
Table of Contents
Title Page
Copyright Page
One
Two
Three
Four
Five
Six
Seven
Eight
Nine
Ten
Eleven
Twelve
Thirteen
Fourteen
Fifteen
Sixteen
Seventeen
Eighteen
RAVES FOR
Deja Demon
A delightfully different take on the paranormal romance theme that will leave fans thirsting for more.
Monsters and Critics
Kenners excellent pacing whips the plot forward while keeping all the emotional turmoil intact. This showdown will change everything!
Romantic Times
Demons Are Forever
[A] wonderful author
a fun premise
excellent characterization, intriguing stories, and snappy dialogue.
Fresh Fiction
Fizzy . . . Kenners trademark cliffhanger finale promises further demonic escapades to come.
Publishers Weekly
This is the third in Kenners splendidly creative series featuring Kate, whose wickedly amusing adventures in demon hunting are a pure paranormal delight.
Booklist
This chapter in Kenners first-person, kick-butt adventures takes a darker turn, and a more serious tone, as Demon Hunter Kate Connor faces long odds and emotional turmoil. The terrific Kenner grabs you and doesnt let go!
Romantic Times
California Demon
Kenner continues to put her fun, fresh twist on mommy-lit with another devilishly clever book.
Booklist
Sassy! [http://Richmond.com] Richmond.com
Plenty of action and humor. Kenner is at her irreverent best . . . delightfully amusing.
The Best Reviews
A fun paranormal adventure that definitely appeals to moms!
Scribes World
More witty, funny, and poignant adventures from the marvelous Kenner.
Romantic Times
Carpe Demon
I LOVED CARPE DEMON! . . . It was great fun; wonderfully clever. Ninety-nine percent of the wives and moms in the country will identify with this heroine. I mean, like who hasnt had to battle demons between car pools and playdates?
Jayne Ann Krentz, New York Times bestselling author of Running Hot
I welcome the novels that decide to be utterly over-the-top and imagine paranormal and superhero lives for their chick-lit heroines. Take Carpe Demon . . .
Detroit Free Press
This book, as crammed with events as any suburban moms calendar, shows you what would happen if Buffy got married and kept her past a secret. Its a hoot.
Charlaine Harris, #1 New York Times bestselling author of the Sookie Stackhouse novels
What would happen if Buffy the Vampire Slayer got married, moved to the suburbs, and became a stay-at-home mom? Shed be a lot like Kate Connor, once a demon/vampire/ zombie killer and now a glorified chauffeur for drill-team practice and Gymboree playdates in San Diablo, California, thats what. But in Kenners sprightly, fast-paced ode to kick-ass housewives, Kate finds herself battling evil once again. Readers will find spunky Kate hard not to root for in spheres both domestic and demonic.
Publishers Weekly
A+! This is a serious keeperI am very ready for the next segment in Kate Connors life!
The Romance Readers Connection
Smart, fast-paced, uniquea blend of sophistication and wit that has you laughing out loud.
Christine Feehan, #1 New York Times bestselling author of Hidden Currents
Tongue-in-cheek...fast-pacing and in-your-face action. Give it a try. Kates a fun character and keeps you on the edge of your seat.
[http://SFReader.com] SFReader.com
Ms. Kenner has a style and delivery all her own
fun and innovative . . . [Carpe Demon] shouldnt be missed.
Fallen Angel Reviews
Youre gonna love this book! A terrific summer read with lots of humor and crazy situations and action.
Fresh Fiction
Kenner scores a direct hit with this offbeat and humorous adventure, which has an engaging cast of characters. Car pools and holy water make an unforgettable mix.
Romantic Times
Titles by Julie Kenner
CARPE DEMON
CALIFORNIA DEMON
DEMONS ARE FOREVER
DEJA DEMON
DEMON EX MACHINA
FIRST LOVE
Anthologies
HELL WITH THE LADIES
(with Kathleen OReilly and Dee Davis)
HELL ON HEELS
(with Kathleen OReilly and Dee Davis)
FENDI, FERRAGAMO, AND FANGS
(with Johanna Edwards and Serena Robar)
Berkley JAM titles by Julie Kenner
THE GOOD GHOULS GUIDE TO GETTING EVEN GOOD GHOULS DO

THE BERKLEY PUBLISHING GROUP
Published by the Penguin Group
Penguin Group (USA) Inc.
375 Hudson Street, New York, New York 10014, USA
Penguin Group (Canada), 90 Eglinton Avenue East, Suite 700, Toronto, Ontario M4P 2Y3, Canada
(a division of Pearson Penguin Canada Inc.)
Penguin Books Ltd., 80 Strand, London WC2R 0RL, England
Penguin Group Ireland, 25 St. Stephens Green, Dublin 2, Ireland (a division of Penguin Books Ltd.)
Penguin Group (Australia), 250 Camberwell Road, Camberwell, Victoria 3124, Australia
(a division of Pearson Australia Group Pty. Ltd.)
Penguin Books India Pvt. Ltd., 11 Community Centre, Panchsheel Park, New Delhi110 017, India
Penguin Group (NZ), 67 Apollo Drive, Rosedale, North Shore 0632, New Zealand
(a division of Pearson New Zealand Ltd.)
Penguin Books (South Africa) (Pty.) Ltd., 24 Sturdee Avenue, Rosebank, Johannesburg 2196,
South Africa
Penguin Books Ltd., Registered Offices: 80 Strand, London WC2R 0RL, England
This book is an original publication of The Berkley Publishing Group.
This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents either are the product of the authors imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, business establishments, events, or locales is entirely coincidental. The publisher does not have any control over and does not assume any responsibility for author or third-party websites or their content.
Copyright Š 2009 by Julie Kenner.
All rights reserved.
No part of this book may be reproduced, scanned, or distributed in any printed or electronic form without permission. Please do not participate in or encourage piracy of copyrighted materials in violation of the authors rights. Purchase only authorized editions.
BERKLEYŽ is a registered trademark of Penguin Group (USA) Inc. The B design is a trademark of Penguin Group (USA) Inc.
PRINTING HISTORY
Berkley trade paperback edition / October 2009
Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data
Kenner, Julie.
Demon ex machina : tales of a demon-hunting soccer mom / Julie Kenner.Berkley trade paperback ed. p. cm.
eISBN : 978-1-101-14529-6
1. Connor, Kate (Fictitious character)Fiction. 2. MothersFiction. 3. Suburban lifeFiction.
4. DemonologyFiction. 5. Domestic fiction. I. Title.
PS3611.E665D463 2009
813.6dc22 2009020288
[http://us.penguingroup.com] http://us.penguingroup.com
One
Stuart! I shouted from my post beside the old Dakota tomb, as the black-clad figure sprinted toward my husband.
Stuart had been crouched near the ground, his forehead creased with concentration as he poked at loose dirt atop an ancient grave site. Now he lurched to his feet, turning as he reached for the dagger he wore sheathed at his hip. The kind of move you saw in martial arts films, where the hero thrusts out a leg and cuts down his opponent with one sweep, then springs on top of the bad guy and presses the tip of his blade to his neck.
My husband, unfortunately, is not an action movie star.
Neither is he a trained Demon Hunter.
And instead of catching his attacker on the approach, thrusting out and defending himself with his blade, my husband toppled backward onto his ass. A string of sailor-quality curses escaped his lips as he rolled sideways trying to avoid the wraith who now leaped through the air, landing with a thud on Stuarts torso, knees on either side of my husbands chest, and both hands tight around his neck.
Kate! Stuart yelled as I dashed forward. This is not what we talked about! He twisted under his attacker, his predicament illuminated by the single lamppost in this section of the cemetery. Off!
Blue eyes under a black ski mask turned to me, and I nodded. The figure rose, peeled off the mask, and flashed a grin so wide and self-satisfied that I couldnt help but laugh.
I dont have any more control over the demons than I do over my daughter, Stuart, I said. Youre the one who wanted to train.
Did I hurt you? Allie asked, offering a black-clad arm and hand to her stepfather.
He took her hand and hauled himself to his feet. If by hurt you mean that I got my ass kicked by a fifteen-year-old kid, then, yeah, I guess you hurt me.
Sorry. Her lips twitched. But Im not fifteen until next week. She turned deliberately to me. And I want a video iPod and my own dagger. She turned, indicating the ivory hilt of the blade sheathed at the small of her back. Not another one of your old ones. Mine. Unless youd rather get me a crossbow? she added, hopefully.
Ill get right on that. I turned my attention back to Stuart. Dont blame Allie, I said. I told her no-holds-barred.
I could have stabbed her!
Your daggers rubber.
Something else we need to discuss, he said, irritably. Allies packing some serious steel.
I crossed my arms over my chest and cocked my head, my expression one I used on the kids at least daily. A little fact that, considering the way he was eyeing me, wasnt lost on Stuart. Shes logged over a hundred training hours with that thing, I said, compelled to soften the blow to his ego.
I know, he said. I do. But Im in a cemetery in the middle of the night in a town that apparently breeds demons. Id like to go out armed with something that packs a little more punch than one of Timmys toys.
The dagger did, in fact, belong to our toddler. A souvenir from a recent trip to SeaWorld. Either that or Peter Pan paraphernalia from the Disney Store. Honestly, its hard to keep track.
Were training, sweetheart, I said. Like you said. Non-lethal is a good thing.
He grimaced, undoubtedly embarrassed by the fact that hed been taken down by a girl who, on some level, probably considered this whole gig fair payback for various groundings and television bans over the years. Even so, his inner politician shined through, and he flashed Allie a genuine smile, the kind that made his eyes twinkle with pride. At any rate, it was a nice move, kid. Your mom teach you that?
Cutter, she said, referring to our martial arts instructor. But Moms definitely got the moves, she added loyally.
Stuart glanced my way, his eyes soft. Yeah, he said. She does at that. He held out a hand, then tugged me close, and I sank against him, this moment of spontaneous affection reminding me that Stuart still loved me despite the secrets Id kept from him. Despite the fact that hed never really known the woman hed married.
My name is Kate Connor, and Im a Level Five Demon Hunter with Forza Scura, a secret arm of the Vatican that, at least in my hometown of San Diablo, California, isnt quite as secret as its supposed to be. Its a whole, big, complicated thing, but ultimately it boils down to my recent return to active duty after a fifteen-year retirement.
Not that Id been looking to return to the workforce. Id been perfectly happy living a quiet suburban life with my not-so-quiet teenager and my even less quiet toddler. But when a demon explodes through your kitchen window intent on killing you, it kind of changes a girls perspective, you know?
So, yeah, Id got back on the job, in secret at first, though my best friend and my daughter learned the truth soon enough.
With Stuart, though, Id clung to anonymity long after it was prudent to do so. The secrets had started to strain our marriage, and when Stuart finally learned the truth, hed reacted with anger and fear. My heart still pinched when I recalled how hed taken our son, Timmy, and moved out of our house, claiming that remaining with me was far too dangerous for a toddler.
Id been heartbroken and furious. But once Id calmed down and been able to think rationally, I had to admit that Stuarts fears werent irrational. No matter how you sliced it, my secret profession boasted a high mortality rate. And trust me when I say that demons arent squeamish about using civilians to achieve their own ends.
Then Stuart had come back, wanting to strengthen our marriage. Wanting to make things work. Id cried tears of relief even as Id silently smothered the guilt brought on by my joy. Because no matter how I tried to spin the situation in my head, there was no escaping the fact that Stuart had brought my baby back into evils crosshairs.
Id fight it.
Id do everything in my power to prevent it.
And Id hunt down like a dog any person or creature who threatened my kid.
But none of that changed the basic paradigm that the world was a dangerous place. Mine, more than most. And every day I did my jobevery time I eradicated another smidgeon of evil from the worldI was ramping up the forces of darkness against myself and my family.
They were keeping score, the bad guys.
And one day, I knew theyd come to settle.
I shivered, and Stuarts arm tightened around me, bringing me back to myself and making me focus on the issue at hand. In the demon-hunting business, distraction could get you killed. And though we might only be training, it was a lesson Id be wise to take to heart.
So what did you do wrong? I asked, moving away from him as I slid into my instructor persona.
Other than wandering around a pitch-black graveyard, you mean? I shifted my focus. The ground caught my attention. I started thinking back, remembering the zombies. And I let down my guard.
Good analysis, I said, duly impressed. When Stuart had first insisted that he wanted to train, Id said no. My husbands no wimp, but at forty-two, and with a gym regimen that consisted of sporadic racquetball games with his buddies from the office, I wasnt certain he was the best candidate.
More than that, notwithstanding the rather huge secret Id kept from him, our marriage had always been one of equals. And I didnt relish the idea of being suddenly in that power position, correcting his technique with weapons, or forcing him to run another mile.
Hed insisted, though, and when hed pointed out that Timmy was safer with two parents who knew how to kick butt, Id had no choice but to cave. And the truth was, he was doing great. He asked the right questions and had enough innate skill that the fight techniques and weapons training came easily to him. Not that I was going to send him out to defend the house against a horde of demonic attackers, but he hadnt injured himself with a knife or crossbow. And I considered that a damn good sign.
In the end, my fear about the shifting balance of power in our marriage turned out to be unfounded. Sure, there were awkward moments, but now that the bubble around my secret life had burst, I was enjoying the new experience of not having to squeeze my husband in around the edges of my reality.
And, yes, getting all hot and sweaty training together does have certain side benefits. And under the right circumstances, even learning to throw a dagger can be a damn sensual experience.
I knew that better than anyone, didnt I?
I shivered, thoughts of my first husband, Eric, intruding where they really didnt belong. Not now. Not with Stuart right there, the wounds on our relationship still raw and tender.
They wont be back, will they? Stuarts question caught me off guard and I cocked my head, confused. Zombies, he clarified. You talked to Father Corletti, right? Worked out a way to keep the beasts out of here?
I did, Allie said, the pride in her voice unmistakable.
Wed recently had a bit of a zombie infestation in San Diablo, and since I was keen on eradicating the smelly little beasts for good, Id promised Allie a birthday party at her choice of venue if she could come up with a solution in less than a week.
It had taken her three days. And I hadnt been sure if I should burst with pride at my daughters resourcefulness and brilliance, or cower in terror from the possibility that shed want to hold her party at home. Wed be forced to sell the house simply because of the destruction wrought by two or three dozen partying teenagers. Either that or bring in a hazmat team for a weeks worth of cleanup.
As it turned out, shed selected the old Palace Theater, a classy choice with a rental price that included a cleanup crew. Bonus all the way around.
We did salt and holy water and then we scattered a powder made from the bones of saints, Allie was saying, her comments directed more to Stuart than to me.
Powder?
She shrugged. I guess they have barrels full of the stuff in the Vatican.
Probably an overstatement, I inserted.
Dunno, she admitted to me, then turned back to Stuart. But Father Corletti overnighted us a couple of pounds, and Daddy and I used your fertilizer spreader toWhat? She leaned in, peering at his face, which did look a little queasy. Its just ground-up bones. Its not like they pulverized living
He held up his hand, and she had the grace to stop. Youre telling me that you and your father came out here to the cemetery with my lawn tools and spread salt and saint bones?
Allie glanced at me, her brow furrowed in confusion. I stared back at her, equally confused. And Stuart looked between the two of us, then sighed. Im seriously considering scheduling time every day, he said. A few moments, all by myself, where I do nothing but sit and ponder the ramifications of what you do and what goes on around here.
I tensed, listening for warning bells in his voice. Signs he was scared or fed up or otherwise ready to bolt on me again. But all I heard was quiet resignation. And, surprisingly, a hint of respect, too.
He met my eyes. She took a fertilizer spreader, he said, as if I hadnt already picked up on that little fact. And because of that, no zombie is rising out of this cemetery.
Is that good or bad? Allie asked, voicing my exact question.
Its a hell of a lot more than Ive managed with the thing. I cant even get the dandelions to stop sprouting. So no vampires rising either, right?
Right, I said. But I already told you I havent seen any vampires in San Diablo.
Better safe than sorry, he said stiffly, and I again regretted the way Id boasted one night, telling him about the time Id fried a few vamps with a Bic lighter and a travel-sized can of Aqua Net. Come on, guys, I said. Timmys going to a birthday party at ten tomorrow, and Id like to get at least a few hours sleep before I spend two hours with fifteen screaming kiddos.
One more go, Stuart said, and I nodded in agreement.
I want you focused, I said to him as Allie pulled the black hood back over her face. Serious eyes peered out from a sea of black, and I turned my attention to my daughter. Youre in the shadows. Use your discretion when to attack, but dont pounce again. I dont think Stuarts ribs can take it.
Probably not manly of me to admit, but your mothers right. Id consider it a personal favor if you didnt break any bones tonight.
No prob, Stuart, she said, then melted into the dark.
Youre on your own, I said, then took a step toward the shadows. The sharp clang of metal against rock stopped me, and I froze, trying to discern the direction from which the sound had come. Allie? I whispered, then jumped as she materialized a few feet in front of me.
Not me, she said, her voice so low I could barely hear it.
I gestured for her to come closer even as I approached Stuart, my muscles tense, my senses hyperalert.
What is it? Stuart mouthed. I shook my head and held up my hand, palm flat, hoping to silently indicate that not only did I not know, but he needed to stay put while I figured it out.
I signaled again to Allie, and she correctly interpreted my hand flapping as orders to get closer to Stuart. I wasnt sure how keen Stuart would be on the concept of a fourteen-year-old girl helping to protect him, but right then I wasnt inclined to tread daintily on his masculine ego. To Allies credit, she got right next to him and took his hand, as if to suggest that he was the one protecting her.
As for me, I moved slowly and silently out of the circle of light. I considered moving them to the dark as well, but decided against it. Id rather be able to see them and know they were safe. In the shadows, anything could happen. A fact of which I was only too aware as I moved through the dark. The night seemed to close in on me, and I shivered, unable to shake the feeling that something was out there. Something other than us. Something watching.
Something waiting.
But waiting for what, I didnt know.
A thick layer of clouds hid a crescent moon, reducing the ambient light to next to nothing. I could barely see my hand in front of my face, and if a demon were crouched in waiting, it was quite likely hed see me before Id see him.
And that realization was my cue to get my family the hell out of there.
I stepped around a tall monument, planning to call to Stuart and Allie. I never got the words out, though, because of the sharp crack of a twig somewhere from the dark in front of Stuart.
I saw him tense and reach out, his hand going for the knife at Allies back even as the figure appeared in front of him, just outside the circumference of light.
Stuart snatched the knife, then hauled back, taking aim even as I raced forward, a sharp cry of No! bursting from my lungs as I recognized the apparition for what it really was.
But it was too late. And all I could do was stand there as the lethal blade flew straight for Eddies heart.
Two
Allies scream joined mine, and I heard Stuarts sharp intake of breath even as the knife whipped, blade over hilt, toward the retired Demon Hunter.
I watched, helpless, as Eddie thrust his arm up in an effort to deflect the impact. But while he still had it going on at eighty-something, those reflexes werent what they used to be, and he missed the knife by a solid two inches, then stumbled back as it connectedhardwith his chest.
No! Allie shouted, racing toward him with me right behind her. Stuart stood frozen, his eyes wide, his hand held in front of him as if it were something contaminated that hed never seen before.
Goddamn, that smarts. The voice, slightly irritated, came from the prone figure of Eddie on the ground, and those curmudgeonly tones danced on my ears like bells tolling my relief.
Allie skidded to a stop at his side, then helped him up, his Oscar the Grouch face more grumpy than usual, though I supposed that was to be expected. He grunted, coughed, and proceeded to rub his head with gusto while Allie made soft noises, as if she were trying to calm an angry dog.
Dressed in black jeans, a black turtleneck, and a black knit cap, Eddie was the very picture of an octogenarian grave robber, and despite the circumstances, I couldnt help my smile. He aimed a gimlet eye at Stuart. You trying to get your guest room back by offing me, pansy boy?
I didnt mean Stuart began, the fact that he was overlooking the pansy part of the equation underscoring exactly how freaked out he was.
Eddie, however, only chuckled. Guess Ill have to quit calling you that, huh? He rubbed his chest. Got something of an arm on you there, slugger. Just gotta learn to hit em with the blade, not the hilt.
Its from lifting all those pansy-ass legal tomes, Stuart said, and Eddies mirth-filled chuckle filled the air. Builds muscle tone.
Little more practice, and youll have the pointy end of those things sliding through demon flesh in no time.
Just so long as I dont take down any raggedly old men.
Heh. I may be old, but Im still spry.
How nice. After months of tension-filled coexistence, the two adult men in my household had finally connected. And all it had taken was for one to almost kill the other. If Id known that, I could have shoved them in the backyard with a handful of knives weeks ago.
You sure youre okay, Gramps? Allie asked, her forehead crinkled with concern. That hit really hard. You coulda broken some ribs.
Eddie thumbed himself on his chest. Rock solid, he said, then held out his hand for her. She took it, leaning in next to him as he swung his arm around her shoulder and allowed her to help haul him to his feet. Dressed as they both were in head-to-toe black, I had to laugh. They looked like an advertisement for multi-generational ninja training, an image with added irony when you considered that they werent actually related, though neither Allie nor Stuart knew that.
And, the truth was, Eddie had truly become Gramps. No, he wasnt Erics grandfather, like Id told Stuart so many months ago before Id settled the then-loopy and involuntarily medicated former Hunter in our guest room. But somewhere between then and now, the fiction had become our reality. Eddie was family. A fact evidenced most strongly by Stuarts recent agreement to have his room wired for cable.
Dont take this the wrong way, I said, lifting my hand up and down as I gestured to Eddies midnight black outfit. But why are you here?
Id asked Eddie to join our little training mission, with both him and Allie playing the role of wandering demons to Stuarts Hunter-in-training. Hed declined. Or, more accurately, hed turned me down flat with a snort and a chuckle and the uniquely unhelpful comment that training Stuart was too little, too late, and if I was going to let my husband go out into the field, then I damn well better be training him to heel.
The sad part? I actually feared Eddie was right.
Eh, Tammys cables down, he said. Decided to call it an early night and see how lawyer-boys training was going. Figured if you wanted me and the kid playing demon, it was the least I could do.
You left a date with your girlfriend because her cable was down? I repeated.
Hell, yeah, he said. Her DVD collection is crap.
Stuart and I exchanged a glance, and I caught the ever-so subtle shake of his head. I exhaled, backing down from my instinctive response to challenge Eddies less-than-romantic approach to dating.
We appreciate the help, I said, but I think were calling it a night.
A snort of protest from Eddie underscored Allies anguished cry of, But! Even Stuart muttered protests.
Although I was probably being paranoid, I didnt back down. Id felt something out there that made the hair on the back of my neck prickle, something other than Eddie lumbering through the dark.
As Eric had recently reminded me before all hell broke loose, Id developed a Hunters instincts over the years. Which meant that my vague sense of paranoia could very well be the minions of hell lining us all up in their sights.
I bit back a sigh, battle weary and tired, but knowing better than to ignore the inevitable. Something was brewing in San Diablo.
So what else was new?
I cocked my head vaguely in the direction of the parking lot. Come on, guys. Im serious. Well do this again next week.
Stuart looked like he was going to join in the protests, but then he took one look at my face and nodded. Good idea. I have some things I need to take care of tonight anyway. Im not sure if he saw the resolve in my eyes or if he was simply backing his wife. Either way, I appreciated it.
Follow us home? I asked. Wed arrived in separate cars, as Stuart had come straight from a dinner meeting.
About an hour behind you, he said. I want to check something at the house. He didnt mean our house, and all of us standing there knew it. Our heads swiveled in unison to the western edge of the cemetery and the cliff face that led up to the Greatwater Mansion, now owned by Dorsey-Connor Development, though the down payment had been so minuscule, I think it was fair to say the bank owned the house more than my husband or his new business partner, Bernie Dorsey.
Theyd owned the place for sixteen days now, the plan being that theyd fix it up, flip it, and make a huge profit. So far, theyd barely dipped their toes in the fix-it-up stage, and even Allie and I had been recruited to help with cleanup and basic upgrades.
Me. The woman who gets flat-head and Phillips screwdrivers confused.
Honestly, there are times when I think that Stuart still doesnt know the woman he married.
The mansion had a checkered history, some colorful owners, and ties to the Golden Age of Hollywood. And though it had fallen onto serious hard times, the extent of the work required had ensured the price was right. Now the trick was to get it back in shape without spending so much money that it ate into the profit potential.
Want to come? he added.
Tempting, but I shook my head. I want to get Timmy, I said. Ill meet you at home. I shot a glance at Eddie. Need a lift?
Eddie knows how to drive, but hasnt bothered to renew his license. For a while, Id been his exclusive chauffeur. Now Tammy had joined the party, and I appreciated the help. Tonight, though, I was guessing hed taken a cab. His girlfriend hadnt struck me as the pushover type.
Heck no, he said, waving toward Stuart. Im going with your boy. Want to see this shack you two keep chattering on about.
Can I come? Allie said. Please? Its not a school night.
Fine by me, Stuart said.
I hesitated, remembering that cold inkling of fear. But the truth was that in my lifein my worldfear had become part of the natural order of things.
Its okay, Mom, my too-wise daughter said. Go get the Timster. Well be fine.
Stuarts forehead creased. Am I missing something? Your Spidey-sense tingling?
I made a face. No. Im fine. Im just
Being a mom, Allie said, with one of her patented eye rolls. She turned to Eddie. This is why Im never gonna get a learners permit. Shes terrified the worlds gonna come crashing down or something once Im behind the wheel of a car.
Or something, I confirmed.
Eddie grunted, then leaned over and scooped up Allies dagger from where it had fallen to the ground. He handed it to Allie, who slid it easily into the holster at her back. Then he closed his hand over the hilt of his own knife and met my eye. Were good, said the octogenarian Dirty Harry.
I cast a quick glance toward Stuart, who nodded. Dont worry, he said, deadpan. I got their backs.
I suppressed a grin. Well, okay then. Ill see you guys at home. Dont stay there all night peeling old wallpaper or something.
And dont you hang back to patrol, Stuart said. Get Timmy, go home, and get some rest.
In the parking lot, I kissed Stuart and Allie, hugged Eddie, and then watched as they all piled into Stuarts Infiniti. I hesitated, my mood melancholy, before climbing into the Odyssey and firing the engine. They drove out first, and I realized I was smiling. For a moment, I didnt know why. And then it hit me: No matter how many times Stuart had told me he was adjusting to the knowledge of my formerly secret life, I hadnt quite believed him.
Tonight, however, wed been a family. A real family, albeit one that hangs out in cemeteries. But a family without secrets between us.
And damned if I didnt like the way that felt.

At least you know hes got good reflexes, Laura said. Oh, to have seen the look on his face.
He looked a little like he did when I told him I was pregnant with Timmyterrified, surprised, and secretly proud of himself. I reached for another muffin, smiling in earnest now. What had seemed serious in the cemetery now qualified as coffee-time gossip with my best friend. No one had been injured, Stuart had learned a lesson, and we had a great family story to tell around the table at Thanksgiving. At least on those years that Stuarts parents didnt join us.
Seriously, though, Laura said as she refilled both our mugs, is he doing okay?
With which? Adjusting to his wifes secret identity? Or learning to be sidekick boy?
Both. She slid into the chair opposite me and took a long sip. For that matter, how are you doing?
Under the circumstances, Im doing just great.
Laura lifted a brow, examining me over the rim of her coffee mug, obviously trying to decide if I was shooting straight or if I was shoving organic fertilizer her way.
Okay, fine, I said, copping to a little bit of fertilizer. On the family front things are going really well, actually. Stuarts demonstrating an excessive amount of togetherness, but its such a novelty that Im not yet teetering on the brink of insanity. And Allies actually keeping her room clean and helping around the house.
Probably afraid that if she doesnt, youll take away her dagger.
Whatever works, I said. Although I am a little concerned about her schoolwork.
Laura nodded sympathetically. I was afraid of that. Mindy said some things.
Warning bells clanged in my head. What kind of things?
What youd expect. That Allies been distracted. Doing her homework, but not doing it well even though shes spending a lot of time in the library. She got up and pushed back from the table, then opened the cabinet above the sinkthe one where she keeps the liquor. Want something with more kick than caffeine?
Do I need it?
Probably not, she said. But I do. Hell of a day here, too.
Oh, hon, I said, the sympathy in my voice real despite the fact that I was not interested in shifting from Allies problems to Lauras. Not just yet.
Laura laughed, obviously reading my expression, then took down a bottle of Baileys Irish Cream, which happens to be one of my not-so-secret vices. Dont worry. Its all about Kate until weve exhausted the subject or the bottle. Whichever comes first.
And then all about Laura, I said, loyally.
Ill hold you to that. She set the ice machine on her refrigerator door to serve crushed ice, filled two small glasses, then topped them both off with Baileys. About three times the expected serving size, but I wasnt in the mood to complain. And considering the way Laura popped back half the glass, I figure she needed it.
Doctor Hunk? I asked, referring to the sexy emergency room doctor shed been dating recently. She topped off the glass, which suggested to me that I was right, but waved the question away. Allie, she said firmly. The problems of a fourteen-year-old outrank minor ripples in my love life.
Problems, I repeated. Not that any of this came as a surprise to me. Not really. I could see how much work she was doing playing Hunter-in-training. And if Id actually focused on the issue, I would have come to the rather rational conclusion that between Hunter training and sleeping and the inevitable vegging in front of the television, there simply werent enough hours in the day for her to be cramming schoolwork in there as well.
Mindy cant figure out whats up with Allie, Laura said. Thats why she came to me, despite the more traditionally accepted teenage approach of parental avoidance. But shes worried. And, honestly, I think shes pissed off, too. No, she corrected. Not pissed. Hurt.
Ironic, isnt it? Allie had spent hours in a near-fugue state as she tried to decide whether or not to tell Mindy about demons, Hunters, and the rest of it. And, yes, I know its all supposed to be secret, but I felt a little hypocritical requiring Allie to sign on to the vow of silence plan considering Id pulled Laura into my confidence. As it turned out, though, she imposed her own closed-mouth policy. The deciding factor was Eric. With Laura and Paul in the midst of a rather acrimonious divorce, Allie decided that the last thing Mindy would want to hear was the news that Allies father had returned from the dead.
At the time, Id considered it a remarkably mature decision, and one I really hadnt believed Allie would stick to. After all, she and Mindy had been best friends for years.
But stick she had, and although I was proud of my daughters ability to keep a secret, I had to concede that there were serious flaws in my daughters vow of silence. Its still her decision to make, though, I said, after confessing as much to Laura.
I know, she said. And whatever Allie decides to do about Mindy is fine. But the schoolworks still a problem, Kate. Finals are coming up, and even though theyre only freshman, weve got to start thinking about college and scholarships and all that stuff.
I nodded. Now that Paul had walked out, financial woes plagued Laura as much as demons plagued me. Because despite a rock-solid attorney and good community-property laws, Laura was still going to be pinching pennies. Apparently Paul had run their finances deep into the red. Laura would get her share of the pie, but the big revelation throughout the process had been the discovery that what shed believed to be fancy Boston cream pie had turned out to be not much more than those little apple confections from McDonalds.
The lesson? Everyone lies. Not just Demon Hunters.
Mindys going to get loads of scholarships, I said, both loyally and truthfully. The kid earned straight-As and still managed to participate in various extracurricular activities. In other words, exactly the kind of kid Allie was not. Shes going to be fine.
Thanks, she said, then cocked her head as if saying, And your kid?
I sighed and rubbed my fingertips to my forehead. I get the problem, but the truth is that shes applying herself like never before. Granted, her focus is on demons and theology and mysterious events in ancient history, but the kids organized and focused and shes doing damn good work. She just needs to direct some of that energy to what the state of California wants her to learn. Manage that, and shell be golden. At the very least, shell survive finals. That was my hope, actually: that I could get her focused and applied these last few weeks. Nail her final exams and shed start sophomore year with a clean slate.
Maybe David can pull some strings and get her credit for independent study, Laura said. Im pretty sure she was joking, but the idea wasnt half bad. After all, what good was it for Allies dead father to have returned to life in the body of one of her teachers if she couldnt even land a decent grade out of the deal?
I frowned and rubbed my temples before taking another sip of Baileys. Only a few months ago, the mention of David or Eric would have put a warm, fuzzy, slightly guilty feeling in my stomach. Now all it did was scare me.
Have you figured anything out? Laura asked, eyeing me with concern. Because she knew as well as I did that the conversation had taken a massive left turn. Wed abandoned the comparatively tame dead-first-husband-in-living-chemistry-teacher topic to Serious Stuff. The big-time. The absolute worst of the worst.
Nothing, I confessed, desperately wishing I had a more satisfactory answer.
Do you want to talk about it?
I shook my head. There are just some things you have to be in the right frame of mind to talk about, and the fact that a demon is growing inside your first husband pretty much tops that list.
Apparently that little hitchhiker had been inside my beloved for a long, long time. Dormant for a while, and more recently peeking out from its slumber to make a few bids for control of the body it was time-sharing with Eric. Not that Id known any of that during our years as hunting and marital partners. And to be honest, I was still coming to grips with this new take on my reality.
Three weeks had passed since Id learned about the demon inside Eric. Three weeks since wed defeated Goramesh and Abaddon. Three weeks since Father Ben had died.
The pain still clung to me. The impotence Id felt in not being able to save him. And now that horrible sense of helplessness was magnified tenfold in the face of Erics distress. Not only because I didnt have answers, but because Eric had made it clear he didnt want me looking for them.
Not that his wishes had stopped me. Id been on the phone daily with Father Corletti, but though hed offered comfort, wed found no practical solutions. How the demon came to be in Eric, he said, was a story for Eric alone to tell. He shared with me only what he knew and thought was relevant to our search for answers: that the demon had lain inside Eric since birth. That it had been bound within, but was now peeking out, seeking to merge with Eric. Seeking to become one.
Clinging to hope, Father and I had been in full research mode, plowing through ancient texts in the hopes of finding similar accounts. But to say the situation was rare would be an understatement, and wed found no precedent, no clues, no secret incantations for either forcing the demon out of Eric or locking him up inside, dormant once again.
My frustration was rising along with my fear. If we didnt figure something out before the demon fully broke free, Eric would be gone, only a demon would be left. And I was a Demon Hunter.
What does Eric say? Laura asked. Whats he doing?
He tells me hes doing fine. After all, hes known about the demon for years and years, I said, a little more icily than I intended. Sorry. I get pissy.
Lauras smile was pure maternal, and I have to admit I appreciated it. Youre entitled.
I frowned because she was right. I was entitled. Eric had known about the demon throughout most of his life and all of our marriage. And yet hed never told me. Hed taken the burden on himself, certain he could figure out a way to solve the problem and free himself. The veil of secrecy had been blown three weeks ago, however, when the culmination of a prophecy had proven that there was a demon inside Eric. I knew the truth now, and while I was angry and frustrated that hed never told me, I was also terrified for the man I loved.
Can you, um, tell? Laura asked, looking extremely uncomfortable. I mean, can you see . . . it?
Not really, I said. His temper is edgier, but it would be, you know?
Stress, Laura said, knowingly.
The truth is, hes not letting me see a lot. He tells me hes in control and hes been doing research. He says hes got a plan and theres no way hes letting the demon get the better of him.
Do you believe him?
I hesitated. I want to. Father says that Erics been looking for a solution for months. Scouring old records and jumping through all sorts of hoops. He even thinks that Eric might have found the answer.
But?
But Eric hasnt officially told Forza. Hasnt even unofficially told Father Corletti. And even though were still patrolling together, hes dodging my questions and shutting me out. Shutting us all out. Me. Father. Forza.
She took my hand in sympathy. Its harder on him than it is on you, she said. Hes all alone. And hes going through a lot.
Yeah, I said. And he needs help. Its not like hes got a sinus infection. This isnt going away simply because he hides in the dark and wishes it gone.
She squeezed my fingers. Im so sorry.
I hate that hes not coming to me, I said, my voice thin as we got down to the heart of the matter.
He probably hates it, too, she said. But I can see why hes not. Youve got Stuart, after all.
I nodded, knowing it was true. Knowing that I was selfish for wanting Eric to still depend on me even after Stuart and I had repaired the rifts in our marriage. I loved him, though, and the thought that he was going through this alone broke my heart.
Have you told Stuart?
Yeah, I said. I told him last week. Id hated doing it. Stuarts acceptance of my world was still understandably fragile. But hed sworn an oath to take me for better or for worse, and hed come back to me promising to honor that oath.
Since a demon-possessed ex-husband definitely counted as a tick-mark in the for worse column, I had to force Stuart to put his money where his mouth was.
Exactly, Laura said, when I explained all of that. Full disclosure. My little girls growing up.
It wasnt easy, I admitted. He left because he was scared of the danger inherent in my job. Now the dangers gotten personal.
It was always personal, Kate.
Score one for Laura.
Are you scared?
Of Eric? The idea of being scared of Eric seemed hugely disloyal. Lets just say Im worried.
What about Allie? Is she worried, too?
Absolutely not. The demon may be coming, I said, but it isnt here. Not yet. Erics still patrolling. Hes killing demons side by side with me. Hes still Eric, I said, filling my voice with certainty. And she hasnt got a clue.
You sure about that?
I hesitated, my chest tight merely from the suggestion. I didnt want to believe, but more than that, I didnt believe. She never heard the description of who could wield the sword, I said, referring to the vaguely worded prophecy that, ultimately, had proven the existence of Erics demonic hitchhiker.
She might have read it. Overheard you talking. Figured it out somehow.
She would have told me, I said, then frowned as Laura stared me down. I knew what she was thinking without her having to say a word. Allie was fourteen years old. And although I might have an exceptionally close relationship with my adolescent Hunter-in-training, I was an idiot if I thought she confided all to me. I caved. Or maybe youre right. Ill pay attention. See if I can figure out if she knows without actually telling her.
Secrets within secrets, Laura said.
Welcome to my world, I deadpanned. Completely screwed up, but always interesting.
Would it help if I told you I was pretty sure my husband actually is a demon?
I almost cracked a smile but managed to bite it back.
Didnt think so, she said.
I can kill him for you, I said. If hes demonic, its totally within my province.
Tempting, she admitted. But probably not the best idea. She got up and started moving around the kitchen, wiping the squeaky-clean counter down with a damp rag and otherwise telegraphing the fact that she didnt know what to say or how to make me feel better. And the hell of it was, I couldnt help her out. I didnt know what I needed, either, except to have Eric back to normal. And I didnt have a clue how to get there. To be brutally honest, after everything that had happened, I wasnt even sure what normal was anymore.
They didnt stay too long at the mansion, Laura said, peering through her kitchen curtains.
Hmm? I said, my mind on Eric and secrets and the messiness of life in general.
Your house, she said. Someones home.
That got my attention. No way, I said. I glanced at the clock. It hasnt even been an hour.
She didnt bother to respond, just stepped to the side, taking the curtain with her so that a triangle of window was revealed. Laura lives one street over, her house backing up to mine, with only a utility easement separating our two properties. From her kitchen window, she had a mostly unobstructed view of our back porch and living room. Our storage shed blocked her view of the kitchen, but at the moment, that didnt matter. Because I saw it, too. The lights on downstairs. And the shadow moving within.
Youll watch him a little longer? I said, nodding toward Timmy, whod been sacked out on the couch when Id arrived, and hadnt moved once during our entire conversation.
Youre going over there? Call Stuart. Hell, call the police.
I considered that plan for about ten seconds before dismissing it. If Stuarts home, Ill know soon enough. If its a demon, Im more qualified than the cops.
And if its a plain, old-fashioned burglar?
Then the odds are good Ill scare him off, I said.
And if not?
I lifted a shoulder. I can handle myself.
Jesus, Kate, she said, but it didnt matter, I already had her kitchen door open, and was slipping my jacket back on. The one with the stiletto conveniently hidden in the sleeve.
Grab the holy water out of my purse and toss it here, I said. Keys, too.
She frowned, but complied. Promise me you wont end up dead, she said.
I stepped over the threshold and onto her back stoop. I promise, I said. It was an oath Id sworn innumerable times. So far, at least, I hadnt broken my word.
I figured that had to count for something.
The house was shadow-free as I approached, and I began to wonder if Laura and I were simply being paranoid. Maybe a cloud had passed over the moon. Maybe headlights hitting the front of the house had transformed my wooden coatrack into a wraith.
Or maybe I was engaging in some serious wishful thinking.
Keeping my senses sharp, I moved toward my house. The lights had been on inside, but I knew that didnt mean the outside was necessarily clear. My intruder could have a companion, and the last thing I wanted was to get jumped on the way to my own ambush. So despite my eagerness to figure out what was going on, I moved slowly and with precision. A good plan in general, actually, considering that the length and breadth of the Timmy-created path of destruction had transformed our yard into a veritable warzone, complete with tiny Timmy toy land mines.
I eased my way around a pile of plastic soldiers, gently kicked aside an inflated beach ball, and skirted the empty dinosaur sandbox.
I moved to my left, edging up against the side of our storage shed, then peered cautiously around the corner, half-expecting a demon to rush me. When none did, I let out a quick sigh and continued forward. I remembered our motion-sensing back-porch light too late, and sprang sideways as it flashed on, hoping it would flash immediately off before my uninvited guest noticed me.
Stock-still in the shadows, I watched the house, frozen for longer than was comfortable until I was certain that Id remained unnoticed.
Then I edged around the front of the storage shed, my back only inches from the structure, staying clear of the lights effective range until I reached the corner of the house.
We have a picture window in the breakfast area that looks out over the backyard. That window had, in fact, been my re-entree into the world of demon hunting, and I found it ironic that I was now on the outside, hands and face pressed to the glass, as I peered inside, hoping to catch sight of a demon.
And, yeah, I really did hope to see something. To my way of thinking, finding a demon in my house was a lot better than not finding a demonand spending the rest of the night wondering what the heck Laura and I had seen.
Unfortunately, my prolonged peering revealed no movement, though I did notice that the light at the top of the stairs was on, as was the overhead light in the living room. The second one we left on almost constantly, so that was no surprise, but the light at the top of the stairs had recently shown signs of shorting out, making it necessary to jiggle the switch in order to get any light at all. Because Im way more afraid of fires than I am of demonsand because Stuart hadnt managed to fix one little switch despite assuring me that he had the skill to tackle an entire mansionId gotten into the habit of making sure the light remained off unless someone was actually going up or down the stairs.
At the moment, that little requirement wasnt satisfied. But whether a demon was breaking my rules or a teenager, I didnt know. Frankly, I considered either possibility equally likely.
Still without evidence of a demonic invasion, I eased toward the porch, less worried this time about the light that burst on at my approach, determined to make me nice and visible to any nearby demons. Fortunately, no attack was forthcoming, and I considered it my lucky evening.
I slid my key into the lock as quietly as possible, twisted, and pushed open the door. In fairness, the creak of the hinges was barely audible, but to my ears, it seemed to ring out like a shot, and I froze in the threshold, senses on alert, ready to take out whatever creature rushed at me.
Since nothing rushed, I stepped inside and quickly keyed in the alarm code, noting with interest that it was, in fact, still armed. Either Laura and I had suffered from a dual hallucination, or my demonic intruder had entered and then reset the alarm behind him.
I glanced around, frowning at the implications. All quiet. No off-putting smells. No heavy footfalls. Not even the eerie scratch of a tree branch against an upstairs window.
As far as I could see, nothing was out of place, either. Stuarts magazines, Allies schoolbooks, Timmys entire Thomas the Tank train set. The room was a complete shambles, but it was a homey kind of clutter, and damned if I didnt feel let down.
I was chastising myself for being ridiculous when a sharp, musical twang rang out. I slipped my right hand into my left sleeve, grasping the hilt of my hidden stiletto. With the blade comfortable in my hand, I turned slowly toward the staircase, an admonition to be careful what you wished for ringing in my head.
The sound had come from above, and I recognized it. Timmys Playskool piano. Clunky colorful keys in a sturdy plastic shell. Virtually indestructible. And loud, too. I should knowId banged against it in the middle of the night often enough.
And now, apparently, I wasnt the only one.
I held my breath, watching the stairs and listening. For the most part, our house is well-built, but there are a few creaky places, and the hallway in front of Tims room is one of them, a fact I learned only too well when he was an infant and Id tried to sneak away as hed drifted off to sleep. It had taken only one step on that creaky floorboard for me to learn my lesson.
An intruder, however, shouldnt be familiar with that little quirk.
Except no sound came. No creaks, no footsteps, no evil cackling.
Well, damn.
Whoever this demon was, he was beginning to piss me off.
I climbed the stairs slowly, avoiding the one creaky step and then the creaky board in front of Timmys room. His Thomas night-light was glowing, casting the room in blue and red shadows. I glanced around, for the first time noticing how menacing Tigger and Pooh can appear in the dark.
A sharp creak sounded to my right, and I shifted as the accordion door moved ever so slightly outward. The door hadnt been completely closed when Id entered, but I was certain the gap hadnt been more than three or so inches. Now it was a good seven inches, and growing.
And, honestly, Id had enough.
Out, I said. We either do this now, or you get out of my house and come back after youve made an appointment.
No answer. Which meant that the demon was either ignoring me, or he didnt have a sense of humor. At this point, I didnt much care. The bastard was in my housein my little boys roomand we were going to end this now.
I crossed the room in two long strides, then grabbed the door with one hand, my knife poised and ready in the other. One quick pull and the entire closet was revealed to me.
Nothing.
Nothing, that is, except Kabit. The giant fuzz ball blinked up at me, then actually had the gall to yawn before stepping out of the closet and carefully circumnavigating the toy piano as he made his way out of Timmys room and back toward the hallway.
Now you walk carefully, I said. You couldnt have stepped a little more lightly a few minutes ago? I caught up with him at the door and hauled the beast into my arms. Naturally, he didnt have the grace to apologize for interrupting my evening. Instead, all I got was a whiff of tuna-scented cat breath. Nice.
I deposited Kabit ungracefully back to the floor, then made a quick round of the upstairs just for good measure. I wasnt entirely sure how both Laura and I could have mistaken the cat for an intruder, but even if wed both seen the devil himself walking through my living room, there was no doubt that the beast was gone now. A fact for which I was grateful, as it was after eleven and I was ready to crash.
Upstairs completed, I did another quick round through the downstairs, then headed to the back door.
That was it. I was done. Nothing to see here, folks. Move on. Finis. Good night.
I yawned, then dealt with the alarm box as I fantasized about one more cup of coffee at Lauras. And another Baileys sounded pretty good, too.
I opened the door, debating the wisdom of two shotsafter all, it had been a trying day. Then I stepped over the threshold, drew in a cleansing breath of cool night air, and screamed.
Three
I bit the scream back and glared at Eric, now standing right in front of me and looking devilishly amused with himself.
Dammit, Eric! Dont do that!
Youre lax, there, Connor, he said, leaning casually on his cane. His mahogany-colored hair glimmered in the porch light, and I saw amusement dance in his silver-gray eyes.
Not lax, I countered. Just irritated. I keep getting attacked by demons who arent really demons.
His face shifted, hardened, and I immediately regretted what Id said. Oh, Eric. Dammit, Im sorry. I wasnt
No, he said. Youre right. Jumped by someone whos not a demon. That would be me.
I swallowed, watching his face. Exhaustion cast shadows beneath his eyes, and I could see the tension . . . and the regret.
It was the regret that made my heart twist, because I didnt understand it. Worse, I knew that if I asked, he wouldnt tell me. I knew, because Id been asking. Night after night, patrol after patrol. Id asked what I could do, how I could help. I wanted to share the burden. I wanted to search for an answer. I wanted to hold him close and tell him it would all be better.
I wanted him to trust me enough to share his pain.
But night after night, he kept his own counsel. And after everything wed shared, that about broke my heart.
I pushed it aside, willing myself not to sink into an emotional quagmire. Why are you here? I heard the harshness in my tone and regretted it. I was angry, yes, but I liked to think I had better control. Apparently I was wrong.
I needed to talk to you.
I tilted my head up, looking at him through narrowed eyes. So talk.
His shoulders sagged, but he stayed silent.
Dammit, Eric, what are you doing here? And why were you in the house? I crossed my arms and stared him down. You were in the house, right?
I had to make sure you were safe.
Well, thats something, I said, hating myself for sounding snippy. Nice to know you still care.
He flinched, and I pushed down a wave of guilt. You know I care, he said, his voice raw.
Do I? I moved closer, my hand going automatically to touch him. I pulled it back, afraid of the connection if I brushed against his skin. Or maybe I was afraid thered be no spark at all. Youre shutting me out, Eric. In all our yearsin everything weve been through togetheryouve never shut me out before. Hed kept secrets, I knew that now, but hed never closed his heart.
Katie, he began, but I shook my head. I couldnt stand to hear another excuse. Another diversion.
Forget it. You want to keep it businesslike, then thats what we do. Just tell me whats happened. Why do you think Im in danger?
He blinked, and I saw confusion in his deep gray eyes. I also saw fear. Dreams, he finally said. Impressions. Dark omens. Hell, I dont know. I just had to see you.
I nodded, trying to conjure a supportive smile as fear rose within me, too. It was happening, I thought. The demon was reaching out, clamoring for control, and leaving the man to rage against shadows.
I clenched my fists and moved closer to this man I loved, again wanting to touch him but not sure that I should. I wasnt afraid of how hed react, but afraid of what Id want. Let me in, Eric, I said. Let me help you.
Its not your problem, he said, his voice unfamiliarly cold. You made your choice.
I swallowed, my throat suddenly thick with tears. Thats not fair, I said. Weve talked about this. I thought you were dead. I loved you, yes, but I moved on.
You love him.
Yes.
Then you have no business with me. Whatevers inside me isnt your concern anymore, Katie.
Youre the father to my daughter, I said. What concerns you will always concern me.
Because of Allie, he said.
Dont make this less than it is, I said, my voice a hairs-breadth from losing control.
And what is that, Kate? he fired back, with vitriol equal to my own. Are you in my bed? Are you even fucking in my life?
I stepped back, then kicked one of Timmys trucks far out into the yard simply because I needed to whale on something. Dammit, Eric, why are you being this way? You know how I feel. I love you. You want me to shout it from the rooftop? Write you a letter? Sing you a freaking ballad? I will. You know I will. But I have a husband. We have a son. You cant ask me to simply walk away from them.
Why not? he countered. Why the hell not? I need you, Kate, he said, his voice breaking. Especially now. Especially with whats happening to me. I cant do this alone.
And yet you wont let me in if I stay with Stuart, I snapped. Thats quite a conundrum. Dammit, I said, my voice softer now. He was in an impossible position. We both were, and right then we werent making it easy on each other. Eric, Im sorry. You know I am. But you also know that Im married. And Im not breaking those vows.
Like I saidyouve already made your choice. I could see the pain in his eyes, could hear the loss in his voice. And I wanted to go to him. Wanted to put my arms around him and hold him close and tell him the Gods honest truth: that I would always love himStuart, demons, and propriety be damned.
But I didnt get the chance, because suddenly he lashed out, the knife that had been sheathed at his side only moments ago now tight in his hand. With the back of his arm, he knocked me off balance. I tumbled to the left, landing hard on a retro-style chaise lounge, the chair and me tumbling backward. I lost my grip on my own blade in the process, the stiletto flying off into the circle of dark that surrounded the porch.
My left arm was trapped between the thick weave of the lounger, and I struggled to untangle myself even as my eyes scanned the porch for another weapon. There was no doubt that I was going to need one. The demon on my porch stood at least six feet tall, with thighs like fence posts. Construction, I thought. Either that or hed been featured in the WWF. Whatever the beasts former life, he was all demon now, and his beefy face curled into a snarl as he kicked out and up, knocking the knife from Erics hand before he lunged at me.
I managed to yank my arm free, then scurried backward, crablike, dragging my ass and legs over the fallen lounger, and then giving the entire aluminum contraption a hard shove toward the demon. Not that my efforts did much good. The beast avoided my thrust, instead spinning around and catching Eric hard across the face. As Eric tumbled to the ground on the far side of the porch I climbed to my feet, managing to knock over one of the pots in which Id triedand failedto plant tomatoes last spring. I bent down and ripped out a chopstick Id used as a stake, figuring it was a better weapon than nothing.
Not by much, though. A fact that quickly became clear when the demon picked up the crumpled lawn chair and hurled it at me, sending me hurtling backward again before the beast himself followed suit, his giant foot aiming down hard toward my throat. I saw the blow coming, planted my feet, and pushed back hard. My shirt rode up, and my back scraped along the concrete, all the gravel that Timmy loved to throw onto the porch digging into my skin. I winced in pain, but mentally cheered in victory, because Id gained the inches I needed, and that massive foot crunched down on my collarbone and not my windpipe.
A Pyrrhic victory when you considered that I was still on my back with a demon on top of me, but at least I was alive and breathing. And, thank God, Eric was back on his feet and aiming a ferocious crescent kick right at my tormentors skull, his weak leg firmly on the ground, his weight pivoting off the head of his cane.
To sweeten the deal, the demon spun to look back, which meant that Erics flying foot connected hard with Dumbos face. I heard the satisfying crunch of bone and cartilage followed by the low wail of the demon as he backed off, blood gushing from his nose.
You are not my concern, male, he said, his voice liquid through the blood.
Oh, I think I am. The leg came around again, but this time the demon was ready. He caught Erics ankle between his hands and twisted, giving Eric no choice but to shift into the turn or feel his leg snap like a twig. He twisted, which landed him on the ground, momentarily defenseless against the demons onslaught. I, however, was back on my feet.
Still armed with nothing more than a chopstick and determination, I landed a solid kick at the small of the demons back, sending him toppling over even as Eric whipped the blade out from inside his cane and thrust it up toward the falling demon.
The demons wail echoed through the neighborhood, the blade piercing the palm of his hand and extending out the back. A defensive wound, since I was certain that Eric had been aiming for the beasts eye.
Now Eric yanked his blade back, and the demon came along for the ride, ending up nose to nose with Eric.
I was right behind, grabbing for the beasts shoulder, ready to jerk it around and thrust my chopstick deep into its eye, when I saw its back go rigid and heard its low, terrified voice. Odayne! it whispered, then backed away, bowing. Forgive! Forgive!
From my angle, I could see Erics face, and he looked as baffled as I felt. An emotion that did neither of us any good, as it gave the demon time to back farther away, managing to both bow and run at the same time. Do not tell her, it said. I do not wish to invoke her wrath. Please, sire, do not tell her. Do not tell. And then it turned and faced me dead-on. Its lips curled into a snarl, and before I even had time to draw a breath, it took off running toward the back of my yard. In the dim light, I saw it leap the fence, then race westward along the easement.
I didnt even think about going after it. Tonight, the demon could live. Right then, I had more important things to worry about.
I knelt down beside Eric then took his hand. He met my eyes, only to flinch and look away again, focusing on something over my shoulder rather than on me. Its out, I said. Its visible. This demon inside youhe saw it. He named it.
Eric nodded, looking as miserable as Id ever seen him.
How long? I whispered. How long has it been that close to the surface?
He shook his head. I dont know.
What about its name? I pressed. Did you know the demons name? I was flipping through my mental little black book of demons, trying to remember where Id heard that name before, or even if I had. After decades of hunting, many of the demon names started to blur together and, in truth, I was always more interested in killing them than inviting them over for tea.
The research and study of particular demons had always interested Eric more, and he and our first alimentatore, Wilson Endicott, used to spend hours discussing the various patterns of demons throughout the ages. A demon might manifest in one decade, sliding into the body of a ruler or other important person. The beast could set something vile in motion that would survive even the death of the demons host body. Then the demon might wait another decade or two to manifest again, sliding into another body and continuing the project.
Eric and Wilson had always found the demons endgame fascinating. Me, Id been more interested in my own endgame: getting rid of the beasts and making the world safe for, well, everyone.
Shortsighted, maybe, but at least it kept me focused.
Eric, I demanded, realizing he hadnt answered my question. Did you know the demons name?
His brow creased, and he shook his head slowly, but there was no firm reassurance. Instead, he looked slightly baffled, as if there was something familiar about all that was happening, but he couldnt put his finger on it.
I frowned, not liking that idea any more than I liked the idea of a named demon living inside him.
I started pacing, ripping the elastic off my ponytail so I could run my hands through my hair. This is new, I said. The names bad enough, but just the fact that Thor there recognized you is bad. New and bad. Wed been patrolling together, and Eric had taken out his share of demons without hesitation or pretense.
And not once during our weeks of patrols had any demon shaken his hand and called him brother.
Whats changed? I asked, kneeling back down in front of him. Dammit, Eric, whats changed?
Nothing, he said, and I could hear the fire in his temper. Now he climbed to his own feet, paced in front of me. What do you want me to say? That I have dark, evil thoughts? That my vision turns red? That I stand in front of the mirror practicing my evil laugh?
Eric
Because I dont. Its slow and its subtle and its terrifying.
I licked my lips, watching him, seeing the changes in him, trying to measure them as the anger began to rage. That was the trigger, I thought. At least for now. Anger. Frustration. Maybe even fear. All emotions that brought the demon closer to the surface.
How long did we have before the demon needed no trigger at all?
Some bastard in a Miata cut me off yesterday, he said, his voice little more than a whisper. I floored it and tailed him all the way to the county line. Sideswiped him twice. He almost lost control on the narrows, he said, referring to a portion of the Pacific Coast Highway that skimmed a mountain pass, a sheer cliff on one side and a hefty drop down to the Pacific on the other. Fucker managed to pull it out at the last second. One inch more and hed be a stain on the rocks beneath PCH.
I swallowed, stayed perfectly still, and tried to gauge the distance between me and my stiletto, still forlorn in our unkempt yard.
He lifted his eyes to mine and I saw both rationality and regret. I remember that one, he said. I dont think I remember them all.
Jesus, Eric.
Yeah, he said. I could certainly use His help right about now.
I managed a smile, though I wanted to cry. Will I do?
He looked at me, his eyes dark and unreadable. Then he turned and righted the chaise lounge that had been knocked over in the fight. He sat on it, the movement casual, but his expression far from it. Id give anything, he finally said, to keep you away from this.
I flinched, even though I understood the sentiment. He wanted to protect me. To protect my memories of him. I got that. Understood it. And yet thered been a time in our lives when wed been everything to each other, and even the worst secrets had been shared.
Or at least Id thought so.
Without a word, I sank into the chair next to him. But I am here, I said, and Im not going away. I reached over to take his hand. Let me help, Eric. Bring me in. Dont push me back. Bring me in before its too late.
He said nothing.
As for me, I pretty much wanted to scream. Instead, I relied on my toddler-wrangling skills, counted to ten, and tried a different tack altogether.
Her, I said, and saw his head tilt toward me with interest. The demon said you werent supposed to tell her. That he didnt want to invoke her wrath. Who? Who is she?
I dont know, he said, looking at me dead-on. I swear.
And the horrible, awful truth? I didnt believe him.
The man Id once trusted with my life. With my soul. With my body and my secrets.
My first love. My soul mate.
I didnt trust him.
And I swear the pain of that realization pretty much ripped me to shreds.
I saw the flare of anger flash in his eyes and knew hed seen my disloyalty. I cut my gaze away, ashamed. I told you, Katie. I dont know. Im not in control here, or had that little fact escaped your attention?
You are, I said, believing that with all my heart. What I didnt know was how long he could keep control.
So far, Id seen only small signs of the demon. Bursts of temper. Unnecessary risks.
I shivered, remembering how hed almost killed a human recently. Granted, the man had attacked him, but Eric had lost control. Hed reined it in, but that didnt change the fact that hed gone wild in the first place.
That encounter had been my first clue, actually. My first glimpse of the blackness within.
What have you learned? I asked.
He climbed to his feet, then dusted off his pants. Not enough.
Dammit, Eric, look at me. I got up, too, shifting around so that I was right in front of him. You promised me you had a plan. You didnt need help figuring this out, remember? Thats what you said.
I said I didnt want help, he said, his voice like ice.
I flinched, but forced myself not to show it. To lose my emotions in objective practicality. Then whats the plan? What do we have to do to get you back? You. Free and clear. I drew in a ragged breath and cursed myself for the tears that threatened. Dammit, Eric, I need you. You have to know how much I still need you.
Oh, Kate. He pulled me close and held me tight, his touch so familiar it made me want to cry. I clung to him, guilty that I still wanted him so badly, and yet absolutely certain I would feel equally guilty if I didnt.
Itll be okay, I said. Forza managed twice, right? I said, referring to the fact that, in his youth, the demon had been bound inside Eric. There, yes, but impotent.
At least, thats what Id been told. When Eric was a small child, Forza had locked the demon up, deep inside of him, where it had remained dormant until Eric had unwittingly set it free when hed used Cardinal Fire to destroy a demon wed been hunting deep within the catacombs under the city of Rome.
At the time, I hadnt understood how wed not only escaped from an army of demonic minions, but had also managed to destroy the High Demon whod tortured and killed the other ten members of our team. A demon whod been intent on becoming not only corporeal, but also invincible.
Id been fifteen, Eric almost seventeen. And though neither of us knew it, what happened in the vault that night would color our lives forever.
Afterward, wed been separated for debriefing. Father Corletti and our alimentatore Wilson had asked me the usual array of questions, and Id assumed that Eric was in the boys dorm receiving the same careful going-over. As it turns out, it had been a little more complicated than that. Wilson had given Eric the Cardinal Fire as a weapon of last resort, and hed broken about a thousand Forza rules when hed done so.
The Cardinal Fire, Id later learned, destroyed the demons in the chamber with us. But because the demon inside Eric was shielded, it wasnt destroyed. Instead, the bindings were, making the demon free to move, to grow, to thrive.
So whereas my debriefing had been tape recorders and paperwork, Erics had been candles and ceremonies and a dozen priests chanting from ancient texts, calling upon the power of God to bind the demon once again.
It worked. The demon retreated.
But this time, not as deep.
This time, the demon waited, biding time for the opportunity to come forth. And opportunity had knocked when Eric had died when Allie was only nine, his soul and the demons essence thrust into the ether, still bound together. And it was the demon who had led them back to Earth to now reside in another mans body.
While Eric tried to forge a new life, the demon inside grew ever stronger. So strong, in fact, that the binding rituals used twice before no longer worked. I still held out hope that wed find some obscure procedure. Some heretical incantation. Something, anything, that would lock back inside the demon that Id played a part in making stronger.
Because I had indeed played a parta key partin accelerating the demons attack on Eric. After all, I was the one whod used the Lazarus Bones.
I wasnt proud of the way Id played God that night, but I couldnt deny what Id done. After only recently learning that Eric had returned in Davids body, Id been faced with the horror of watching him die again, made worse because Id played such a vivid role in his demise. Because Id been the one who killed him.
Id killed him because I had to. Because hed begged me to. And Id done it in order to prevent a demon from moving in and taking over his body.
Ironic, I thought, now that I knew thered been another demon inside him all along.
I shivered, remembering that night. The way that bitch Nadia had believed shed won. The way the blood had flowed out of Eric as death approached.
At the time, Id only just gotten Eric back, and the thought that he was gone again had ripped me apart.
But Id had the meansId had the Lazarus Bonesand so help me, Id used them. Id brought him back. Or, as Father Corletti would say, Id provided the path for Eric to follow back to life.
And he had, guided for a second time back to corporeal life by that demon inside him.
And in returning to the bodyin again using that demonic trickhed given the demon within a little bit more power.
Father Corletti had told me I didnt cause a demon to be inside Eric, and I knew that was true. But there was no denying that Id helped the demon gain strength.
That was something Id have to live with forever.
As if sensing my need, Eric pushed me back and looked me in the eye. Its going to be okay, he said.
I want to believe that, I said. Even more, I want to help.
You do help, he said. Knowing youre there. Knowing what Im fighting for. Thats more help than you can know.
I started to shake my head, to argue, to insist that I had to do more, but he brushed his finger against my lips and shook his head, silencing me. He reached up and twisted a stray strand of hair around his finger, then leaned in closer, the warmth of his breath teasing my lips until those lips actually touched mine. I gasped, and so help me, I opened my mouth to him.
He groaned, accepting the unspoken invitation and deepening the kiss.
I melted against him, my fingers knotting in the material of his shirt, every ounce of me desperate for what wed once shared, longing for the time when wed truly been partners and he wouldnt shut me out.
Except . . .
I pushed gently away, peering into his eyes. Because I knew now that such a time had never really existed. Not to the extent Id once believed. Id opened my life and my heart to Ericmy partner, my lover, my best friendand Id assumed that hed done the same.
He hadnt.
Hed kept secrets from me. Secrets thatif Id knownmight have spared us the danger now lurking inside him.
I closed my eyes and bit my lip, wondering if, had I known, I would have had the strength not to use the Lazarus Bones. Would I have been able to stand there, with Allie looking on, and let her father die?
So help me, I didnt know. And that made me wonder what I would do tomorrow or the next day or the next. What would I do when the demon finally burst free and I had to make the hardest choice of all?
Katie, he said, his voice cracking. He pressed his hands to my shoulders and his lips to my hair. I closed my eyes, taking some strength from him, but that was all I would take.
I told myself that was all I wanted to take. But that, of course, was a lie.
Dont push me away, Katie.
Im not the one pushing, I said. I turned in his arms. We need to fight this thing, Eric. We need to fight it together.
Except were not together.
I shook my head, not willing to let him go there again. I love my husband, Eric, and nothing is going to change that. I love you, too. But were in a different place now, and you know it. So dont try to lessen whats between you and me by lashing out against Stuart.
Fine. He nodded. Fine. You help. And maybe well figure it out before its too late.
I angled a glance at him, hating myself for suspecting that he was lying, saying what I wanted to hear so that Id shut up and go away. Do you know . . . I mean, have you got any idea how long
How much time I have? How long I can fight back the beast? I winced from the harsh edge of his voice, but nodded. I dont know, he said. Probably not long.
I drew in a breath, tried to digest that information. You dont patrol with Allie anymore, I said. Not without me.
Youve been enforcing that rule for a while. What? he added, apparently catching my surprised expression. You think I hadnt noticed?
Fair enough, I said. But she doesnt go to your apartment, either.
I braced, expecting a fight, but all I got was a simple nod, and that gesture of acquiescence scared me more than anything. Because it set out in sharp relief what we both already knew. The demon was coming closer. The battle was taking its toll. And he didnt want his daughter anywhere near when and if the beast finally burst forth.
We stood silently, both of us acknowledging that unspoken truth, and as we did, I heard a car pull into the driveway, followed by the steady churn of the garage door mechanism kicking into gear.
You should go, I said, then exhaled in frustration as he crossed his arms over his chest and parked himself on a chair. Dammit, Eric.
What? Are we through here? You dont want to discuss strategy? A plan? Research venues?
Youre being an ass, I said, but I didnt have time to elaborate because Allie came barreling out of the kitchen and into the living room. She hit the brakes, skidding to a stop in front of the couch and turning toward the door, probably noticing the back porch light. That was all it took. Her high squeal of Daddy! rang through the house, and she jumped onto the couch, vaulted over the back, and threw open the door.
Hey, baby, he said, standing up and catching her as she launched herself at him.
What are you doing here? Its like the middle of the night.
Its not like it at all, I said. It is the middle of the night.
She rolled her eyes. Mom.
Im just saying. I saw Stuart and Eddie in the living room, their heads swiveling in unison toward the back porch. A flash of something harsh crossed Stuarts face, erased in an instant by a now-familiar political smile.
David, he said, nodding curtly as he stepped onto the patio. Timmy asleep? he asked me.
At Lauras. I was in her kitchen when we saw someone moving in the house, I added. Or thought we did.
A muscle in Stuarts jaw twitched as he turned to face Eric.
I dont need to break and enter, Eric said, taking a step closer to me. Im welcome.
Considering the level of testosterone flying around, I decided this was a good time to send Allie up to bed. But its the weekend! she protested.
And a good thing, too. Considering how far in the toilet your grades are, you need the weekend to study.
But
Go on, Eric said. Ill call you tomorrow.
I could tell she wanted to argue, but one of the benefits of having her father dumped recently back into her life was that Allie tended to be on her best behavior around him. Which translated into a quick nod, a good-night kiss, and a hassle-free departure.
Stuart waited until she disappeared from view before rounding on Eric. Did you come to patrol? To warn us about an imminent demonic threat? To avert the apocalypse?
I came to talk to Kate, Eric said evenly.
Its after midnight, Stuart said. And last time I checked, Kates cell phone worked just fine.
I wanted to talk to her in person.
Stuart took a deep breath, then nodded, as if he was thinking that one over. Honestly, I didnt much like the look of whatever he was thinking, and when he took a step toward Eric, I casually placed myself between the two of them. Lets be clear, Stuart said, moving in close and putting a possessive hand on my shoulder while he stared down Eric. Kates my wife now. And this is my house. Ill admit I was a little freaked out when I learned the truth about youabout all of itbut I came back. I came back, he repeated, and I swore Id fight for her. For my family. So dont think I didnt mean it.
If its a fight you want, Eric said, I think we can work something out.
Eric I said, my voice low and my tone fierce.
But Stuart didnt need my help. Do not, he said. Do not come onto my property and play games with me. I respect that you love my wife. I get that you two have a history beyond anything I can imagine. Most of all, I understand that you lost your family and that you want time with your daughter. I understand it, I acknowledge it, and I even support it. But not like this. You do not show up at my house in the middle of the night to meet clandestinely with my wife. You dont disrupt our household. And whatever personal problems you may have because you landed in some other guys body or because some badass demon wants to pull your chain, you deal with those somewhere else. Not here. Not in my home.
He took another step closer to Eric. Are we clear?
I tensed, waiting for the explosion, but it didnt come. Instead, Eric kept his eyes on Stuart, as if taking his measure, and for the first time finding Stuart adequate. He nodded, short and curt, before turning to face me. Tomorrow, he said. We patrol.
Tomorrow, I acknowledged, then watched as he moved through the dark to the side gate, Stuart clutching tight to my hand.
I dont want him in my house, Stuart said after the gate swung shut.
Inside, I said, opening the back door and leading Stuart in before locking it and resetting the alarm.
I mean it, Stuart said. He isnt welcome here.
I glanced automatically toward the stairs, but saw no evidence that Allie was snooping. Hes the father to my daughter, I said, keeping my voice low as I led him into the kitchen. Im not sleeping with him.
Stuart winced, but had the grace to look chagrined. You love him.
I closed my eyes. That one, I couldnt deny. And when I looked again at Stuart, I didnt see anger or jealousy. All I saw was frustration, and that directed not at me, but at himself.
Oh, God, Kate, he said, sinking into one of the chairs around our battered Formica breakfast table. Im sorry. I trust you. Hell, I even pity you. Not exactly the typical interaction with the former husband weve got going here. But I gotta be honest. He terrifies me.
Hes not taking me from you, I said.
Thats not what I mean. He pushed the chair beside him out with his toe, and I sat down, facing him, and knowing exactly where this was going. Theres a demon inside him, remember? Youre the one who explained it to me. Or have you forgotten?
Of course I havent forgotten, I snapped, though at the moment, I regretted my decision to be quite so forthcoming.
Hes dangerous, Kate.
He wont hurt me.
Maybe, Stuart acknowledged. And maybe not. But what about me? Or Timmy? And even if he doesnt physically hurt Allie . . . He trailed off, leaving me to draw my own conclusions.
Im working on it, I said. Hes working on it.
Stuart looked at me, his eyes seeing more than I wanted. Whatever youre doing, he said, do it faster.
Four
Mommymommymommymommmeeeeeeeee!Get up, Mommy! Up! Up! Up!
I shoved a pillow over my head and rolled over, which was not the way to soothe the savage toddler, who proceeded to march atop the bed humming and screaming and generally making a nuisance of himself.
Wheres your father? I asked. Your sister. Somebody, anybody, help me.
Me, me, me, he said, plunking his little body on my back and aiming a spit-filled whisper toward my ear. Daddy says up, Mommy. Get up now!
I rolled over, saw the empty side of the bed, and smelled a rat. Did Daddy send you to wake me?
He nodded gleefully, then thrust his arms up toward the ceiling. Do that, Mommy!
And despite the fact that I was operating on absolutely no sleep, I tossed my arm above my head, which I considered hugely generous since I knew exactly what was coming.
Sure enough, Timmy leaped on me, his little fingers scratching under my arms in a toddlers version of tickling. I writhed and chuckled and generally pretended hed managed to hit a tickle nerve. He kept it up for about forty seconds, at which point he couldnt stand it any longer. He flopped back on the bed, arms high above his head. Do me, Mommy! Do me!
I dont know, I said, as if I really had an option here. Daddy said Im supposed to get up, not tickle a little boy.
Yes, tickle! he screeched, his little face scrunching up and displaying all the signs of an oncoming tantrum.
Whoa, whoa, I said. I was just kidding. I looked up at the ceiling. Wow! I said, as if amazed. Look at that. Can you reach it?
What? Tantrum forgotten, he turned big eyes upward. Right above you, I said. If you reach really high, you might be able to catch one.
He climbed to his feet, a bit unsteady on the soft mattress and stretched his arms up toward the ceiling, grasping at nothing.
I pounced, pulling him down to the mattress even as my fingers went for his underarms, tickling for all I was worth. He squealed and kicked and screamed and appeared generally delighted with the whole thing. So delighted, in fact, that even when I fell back exhausted on the bed, he bounced and bounced, crying, Again! Again! Again! so many times that Stuart and Allie appeared in the doorway.
Youre stuck now, Allie said. Once he starts, theres no going back. Duh-duh-duh-dummmmmm, she added, in a bad parody of a horror movie soundtrack.
Thanks, I deadpanned. Youre very helpful. You? I asked, shifting my attention from my daughter to Stuart.
Sorry. I got nothing. Except pancakes. How about it, sport? Want to make a trade? Your mothers freedom for a Mickey Mouse pancake with chocolate chip eyes?
Pancakes! he screamed, then leaped off the bed and scurried past his father for the stairs.
Tossed aside for carbohydrates, I said. Isnt it always the way?
Stuart blew me a kiss, then headed out of the room to make good on his promise. I rolled out of bed and headed to the armchair that has never seen a persons tush, seeing as it has throughout our entire marriage served only as a place to hold clothes. I found a pair of sweatpants and tugged them on. I was already wearing a Coronado High PTA T-shirt, so I was now as dressed as I intended to get until after coffee.
I checked the clock, saw that it was painfully early for a Saturday, and decided I had plenty of time before Timmys ten oclock social engagement. I also saw that Allie was still hovering in the doorway looking expectantly in my direction.
Well?
In response, I shoved my feet into fuzzy bunny slippers. Ummm?
Daddy, she said, rolling her eyes. Why was he here? Can I hang out at his place this weekend?
He was here because we had things to discuss, and not this weekend.
But
He has to run into L.A., I lied.
I could go with him.
I bent down and adjusted my bunny slippers so that my daughter wouldnt see the lie on my face. I dont think its convenient this time, kiddo.
But we can ask him, right? I mean, I could call, and
No.
What? Why? Her wail drifted all the way downstairs, and Stuart yelled back up with a curt, I didnt say anything.
But why not? Allie said, trying again with a softer voice.
Your grades, for one, I said, heading for the door. Your father and I are both concerned. I told myself I was feeling no guilt. We were concerned. That just wasnt my reason for keeping my daughter from her father.
As for the real reason, I should feel no guilt there, either. After all, my first job as a mom was to keep my kids safe. And even Eric agreed that Allie was better off not being alone with him.
That simple fact sat like a dead weight in my stomach, and my fingers itched to pick up the phone and try to reach Father Corletti. We were missing something. Something huge. Something that would save Eric if only we could find it. And now, with the demon inside gaining strength and some anonymous She-Demon out there, I feared we had to find it fast.
I frowned, realizing I hadnt told Stuart about our little encounter with Gargantua the Wonder Demon last night. I glanced toward the door, guilt pooling in my gut. Id promised Stuart full disclosure, but I hadnt realized how quickly that would become dicey. Demons attacking in the backyard. Demons buddying up to Eric. That was the kind of stuff that could really worry a man. Hell, it worried me.
Mom!
Hmmm? I turned toward her, but my thoughts were still on Stuart. A short secret, I thought. Thats all. Id gather a little more information, and then Id tell him everything. At the very least, I wanted to figure out who this She-Demon was. If I had to tell Stuart there was another Big Bad with me in its sights, at a minimum I wanted some information about my enemy. To get that, I was going to need help.
Mom!
I smiled negligently at Allie, but my thoughts had drifted to Father Ben. Hed been my alimentatoremy guide, my helperand hed been brutally murdered only weeks before. As always when I thought of him, I felt the stab of regret. Id been too late to save him, and though I knew in my heart that his death wasnt my fault, I couldnt help but shoulder some of the blame. Those ripples again. Hed come to San Diablo to minister to a parish; hed become involved in Forza because hed met me. He had, I thought, deserved better. And at the same time, I knew that he would be proud dying the way he had, defending the innocent against the onslaught of evil.
Mother!
Allies shriek finally broke through my musings. Sorry. What?
I can study at Daddys, she said, her exasperated tone matching her expression.
I shook off thoughts of Stuart and Eric and mysterious female demons and focused on my daughter. Sorry, kid. You study here.
Thats so unfair, she wailed.
Incredibly, I agreed. But until youre the mom, you have to live with my arbitrary and capricious rules. That means no applying for your learners permit until your grades are up
Big deal, she said sulkily, having recently had all her illusions shattered by the previously unknown fact that her fifteenth birthday wasnt the magic day for applying for her permit. That day was fifteen years plus six months. And to a teenager, that extra six months might as well be six years.
I didnt make the rules.
She crossed her arms over her chest and stared me down. Maybe not that one.
I tried not to laugh, but I couldnt help it. Fair enough. I aimed a finger out the door. So whats it going to be? Breakfast with the family or sulking in your room?
Sulking, she said, then turned to slink down the hall. Im pretty sure she expected me to call her back, but I didnt have the energy for a fight. Instead, I called after her, reminding her to use the time to study. My response was a frustrated groan and a firm slamming of the door. Im probably a bad mom, but I couldnt hold back my smile. Because grades and studying and teenage angst had absolutely nothing to do with demons. A tiny bit of normality had snuck into our decidedly abnormal life. And damned if that didnt feel nice.
Youre chipper, Stuart said as I slid into my chair at the table.
Allies banished to her room studying, I said. Im pretty sure Im on her shit list for the day.
Shit list! Timmy shouted, and Stuart cocked an eyebrow while I silently mouthed a contrite, Sorry.
Well, I can see why that puts a spring in your step, said my husband the comedian.
Cant I be in a good mood? Do I have to be sullen just because my daughter is?
What exactly is she sullen about?
I hesitated, our newly established full-disclosure lifestyle at odds with my unilateral decision to postpone the whole full-disclosure thing for a day or two. Im not letting her go to Erics, I said.
Well of course youre not, Stuart agreed, and I saw the moment comprehension hit. And she doesnt understand why.
Sure she does. I smiled. Her grades suck.
Suck! Timmy yelled gleefully, and I took a deep breath and counted to ten. Party now? Timmy asked. He bounced a little in his seat, thrilled at the prospect of festivities, even though the child to be feted was a little demon in her own right. Not literallyin my world, those qualifications had to be added. Not that I blamed little Danielle. Her mother, Marissa, had been my arch-nemesis since Id joined the PTA. And although Id learned to tolerate her, I didnt see any girlie shopping moments in our future. Her eldest, Joann, goes to school with Allie. Little Danielle, the birthday girl, is closer to Timmys age. And since Marisssa had so generously invited us to the party, Id shown my respect, love, and admiration by buying and wrapping a handmade Silly String Shooter, the messiest toy I could find.
I might not be able to stake Marissa, but that didnt mean I had to quietly tolerate her, either.
Now, now, now? Timmy continued to howl.
Soon enough, I said. Lets go get you dressed and well head out the door. The party was at ten and it was only eight-thirty. But I figured wed need a good forty minutes to fight over the outfit. Another twenty to wrap the present (which Timmy had unwrapped yesterday after finding it in the hall closet) and at least fifteen more minutes for me to run into Starbucks and grab the coffee that Id surely need to get me through this thrilling event.
Once we were both cleaned and dressed, I popped my head into Allies room and reminded her that cable was off-limits until shed finished studying. I was rewarded with a grunt, which I assured myself meant that I was fulfilling my parental role. Then I scooped Timmy up and, holding him upside down so that he giggled and squealed and wriggled so much I feared for dropping him, headed down the stairs. Stuart was shrugging into a jacket when we slid to a stop in the entrance hall.
Whats up? I asked.
Running into the office, he said, checking his watch.
On Saturday?
Clark wants a meeting.
Oh. I frowned, processing that tidbit. Clark Curtis was the current lame-duck county attorney and Stuarts boss, although that relationship had turned extremely awkward two weeks ago when Stuart had informed Clark of his intention to back out of the race for county attorney, smearing egg all over Clarks face in the process. You didnt mention it.
He called yesterday. I was planning to tell you after I measured the fallout.
I nodded, glad I wasnt the only one hoarding information. Are you sure you dont want to go back? So far, only Clark and a few key figures knew that Stuart was pulling out of the race. The handlers had decided to keep it quiet while Clark chose a replacement for my defecting husband.
I thought I saw something wistful pass over Stuarts face, but he shook his head. Too much time. Too much energy. He leaned forward and kissed me on the cheek. I have better things to focus on.
I gave him a quick hug, hoping I seemed supportive and not worried. Because no matter what Stuart said, I knew that the bottom line here was unemployment. I couldnt imagine Clark suffering that kind of loss of face and still keeping Stuart on the rolls as an assistant county attorney any longer than was politically correct. Two weeks sounded about right for that purpose, so I had a feeling today was the day Stuart was getting the ax. And since Forza doesnt currently offer health coveragemuch less vision and dentalI felt a slight stirring of discontent for myself and my two offspring.
But I smiled and hugged my husband and wished him good luck . . . and as soon as he was out the door I said a quick prayer and asked for St. Judes intercession. After all, every little bit helps.
Since Timmy absolutely refused to let go of Danielles present, I was struggling to strap him into his car seat with a package on his lap when I heard the front door creak open. I glanced around and saw Eddie shuffle down the sidewalk in his ratty green bathrobe, his finger held up for attention.
Hold up there, girlie. You coming straight back after the kiddie fest?
I mentally ran through my schedule and realized I was. My class on tiling at Home Depot wasnt until two. Yup. What do you need?
Lift to work, he said. Gotta be there at one. Working the afternoon shift.
I raised my brows. Work? This was news to me.
Been putting in a few hours, he said. A fellow needs his spending money.
Oh. I had a sudden image of Eddie working the checkout line at Walmart, and counted the days until he was fired. Somehow I didnt think his generally grouchy attitude fit the corporate profile. Actually, I couldnt think of any jobs where Eddie fit the profile, except Demon Hunter, and he was quite retired from those ranks, his current forays into hunting now focused primarily on announcing how much I still had to learn and how limited Forza was in its view of the world. It would be annoying were he not so often right. So where are you working? I asked.
New shop in Old Town, he said. Doubt youve heard of it.
Really? I pondered the possibilities along with the fact that Eddie seemed so reticent to share the details.
So can you give me a lift or not? If I gotta call a taxi I need to know now. Damn cabs need half a days notice to get anywhere on time.
I licked my lips as a new thought occurred to me. Actually, maybe we could trade favors.
His eyes narrowed, bushy eyebrows twitching like caterpillars. Eh?
I need help, I said. I need an alimentatore.
Ah, Eddie said, all humor draining from his face. Right.
I swallowed, determined not to cry. I could really use the help. Please?
The Vatican aint got a spare? Eddie asked, lightening the mood.
Im sure theyre working on it. I want you, I added, realizing as I spoke how much I meant it.
Do you now? Ya wanna tell me why?
I could have rattled off a hundred reasons, starting with the fact that Eddie had seen things Id only imaginedand Id seen my share of the horrific. I could have cited his knowledge and his experience, not to mention his tenacity. I could have even bribed him with a TiVo box.
Instead, I settled on the one thing that mattered to me most of all. Its because of Eric, I said, and watched as his eye twitched at Erics name. You know about the demon, I said. But theres more. I gave him the quick and dirty overview of what had happened before he and Stuart and Allie had arrived home the night before.
Aint it always the way. Some power-hungry demon moves into town and right away tries to take you out.
Its the job, I deadpanned. Theyre all so jealous.
He snorted. Yeah, theres that. So you want my help tracking She-Ra down.
I did, of course, but it was more than that. The demon scented Eric. I need answers, Eddie. And I need them fast.
Heh, he said. You want an answer? I got one for you right now, free of charge. He poked me in the chest with one bony finger. Shove a knife through his heart before the demon takes root. Kill the boy now and consider yourself lucky.
Hes Allies father, Eddie. She loves him. I paused, then looked him dead in the eye. And so do I.
His shoulders drooped, all the vinegar disappearing from his attitude. Kate.
No, I said, shaking my head. No, you cant say no. You cant walk away from this. I want to help him, Eddie. I have to help him. And I need someone wholl see what I cant.
The demon, you mean. If youre gonna fight it, ya gotta at least say it.
Fine, then, I said, more harshly than I intended. Youll see the demon, Eddie. You wont see the man I love. And I need that. I need your perspective. I cant do this without your help.
And if there is no help?
I dont accept that as a possibility.
And if there is no help? he repeated.
Then Ill take a knife and do exactly what you said. Ive done it before, I said, steely determination keeping my voice from cracking as I remembered the time not so long ago when Id had to make that very sacrifice, not then realizing I also had the means to bring him back to life. If I have to, I can do it again.
This time, we both knew, neither Eric nor the demon would come back.
He raked his fingers through his hair, giving him an even wilder appearance. When hed finished, he looked back at me. You giving me that ride?
Sure, I said, nodding as I struggled to bring my emotions under control. Hed veered wildly off topic, of course, and I wasnt sure if he was giving me time to gather my wits or if this was the way Eddie negotiated. Either way, I was willing to let this play out however it had to, so long as in the end I got what I wanted.
I took a deep breath and focused on his question. But why do you need me? Doesnt Tammy usually drive you?
Eddie let loose with an exasperated snort. Broke up with me last night, he said. Left a message on the machine. What kind of tacky is that?
Since I thought it was the same kind of tacky as breaking a date because of interrupted cable service, I wisely kept my mouth shut.
You play chauffeur today, girlie. Just one way. I can catch a ride home with my peeps.
Your peeps?
Coworkers, he said. You need to pay attention to the lingo, girl.
Hmmm, I said, not at all sure that peeps had made it into the standard employment vernacular. And tomorrow?
He waved a hand. Im off til Monday. Ill figure something out by then.
Youre not going to start driving again, are you? The idea made me cringe.
Dunno, he said. You willing to cart me around? I got work and bingo.
Yeah, I said, now fully suckered into the big picture. I already carpool a toddler and a teenager. I think I have room for an obstinate old man.
Fair enough, he said. But Im crotchety. Not obstinate.
Ill keep that in mind.
And Ill be your alimentatore, girlie girl. But if Im doing it, Im doing it right. I want all your debriefing notes. All your Hunter journals.
I stood up straighter, surprised. Really?
I aint going into the job half-assed.
All right then, theyre yours. Most everythings in the attic and labeled. Whatever you want, you take.
Okay then. His brow furrowed, and he scuffed his slippers on the pavement. And just so were clearIm doing it for you and the girl. Not for him.
I nodded. I know, Eddie. And thats exactly why I want you.
A renegade pirate rushed past me, his hook catching my skirt and jerking me a few steps forward, his bellowing Aaaarggghhhh deafening.
I yanked my skirt free, pressed my back against the wall, and sucked in my gut as five fairy princesses stampeded after him, wands waving, their own squeals and giggles almost masking the still-echoing howl of their marauding quarry.
Across the room, the birthday princess pressed her fists against her hips and gave her mother the evil eye. But I wanna be a pirate! Dont wanna be a stinky princess! I wanna have a hook!
Sweetie, Marissa said, kneeling down so that she was eye level with her traitorous daughter. Youre a little girl.
Im big! Danielle insisted. And I wanna be a pirate. She stamped her foot for emphasis, and I pressed my hands behind my back to prevent me from applauding. For the first time ever, I was not only getting a glimpse of the real Danielle, but I was about to bear witness to my nemesiss meltdown. Toddler birthday parties didnt get much sweeter than that.
A fiver gets you in the pool, Fran said, sidling up next to me. Most everyones betting on Marissa, but I think Danielles gonna come out the winner.
Spot me five, I said. Im good for it.
I see my rugrat, she said, nodding toward the far side of Marissas garage-turned-party-room where little Elena was steering a Playmobil pirate ship over a blue chalk ocean, a pirate patch over one eye, and not one frilly, princessy thing to be seen.
Fran, Im shocked. Go slap a tiara on that kid right this minute.
Fran snorted, which was why we were friends. Ill get right on that, she assured me. Wheres yours?
I pointed to the opposite corner where Timmy and a boy I recognized from church were going at it with plastic cutlasses.
Just like his mommy, Fran said.
What? I asked, a little too sharply.
Fighting, she said innocently, as I tried to figure out what she knew and how she could possibly know it. Self-defense and all that stuff.
Oh. I exhaled in relief. Youre still coming, right? Though my demon-hunting expertise was still a secret with the public at large, the fact that I had some fighting skill had leaked out. Cutters studio is next door to the 7-Eleven near the entrance to our subdivision. Not only does every one of the neighborhood moms visit that store regularly for last-minute grocery items, but most of the kids in the neighborhood take classes from Cutter. And although most of my sessions with the sensei are private, there was no way to keep my workouts secret. And, honestly, no reason to try.
What had started with a few women asking me if Cutter ever did self-defense workshops, eventually evolved into Cutter suggesting that I put together a program and run it out of his dojo. At first Id hesitated, but Allie and Laura had convinced me that I had a community obligation. Youre a demon magnet, Mom, Allie had gently pointed out. You think there would be so many demons traipsing through this neighborhood if we didnt live here? At the very least, teach them how to kick the buggers in the balls and run away. I mean, thats something.
Id gaped at my daughter, decided not to comment on her crudity, and agreed she was right.
And thus began my career as a womens self-defense instructor.
Or, more accurately, that career would begin this evening. So far, Id worked with Cutter, going over a plan for what to teach and studying up on basic theories of self-defense for women that didnt involve years of training in martial arts or street fighting. I had fifteen women signed up for tonights session, Marissa and Fran included.
Can I bring my mom? Fran asked. I told her what I was doing, and she wants in.
Your mom wants self-defense training? Id met Rita once, and was pretty sure that she was capable of eviscerating a bad guy with nothing but sarcasm and a biting wit. That, and the Taser she carried in her purse, which shed happily thrust at anyone who encroached on her personal space.
Shes always keen to kick someone in the nuts, Fran said. But mostly I think she wants to see Eddie. A definite twinkle flickered in her eye. I think shes a little hot for him.
Good lord, I said. Theyd make a pair. And then, because I figured a woman like Rita would keep Eddie on his toes, I told Fran of his newly acquired single status.
Will he be at your class?
Doubtful. Hes working now. In Old Town.
Her brows lifted. Ill pass the info on to my mom, she said, laughing. I feel so covert.
So no class for her? Since Eddie wont be there?
Fran shrugged. With my mom, you just never know.
A flash of pink across the room caught my eye, and I looked over in time to see Danielles wand go flying up toward the ceiling. It narrowly missed the fluorescent lights, then came crashing back down as Danielle jumped and jumped, her giggles mixed with deep-throated Aarghs as Marissa handed the pink-gowned princess a black eye-patch, a hook, and a skull and crossbones bandana.
On my hair, Mommy! Danielle shouted. Looking pained, Marissa knelt down and hid Danielles perfectly perfect curls under a cap of black bandana.
I never thought Id see the day, Fran said, as Danielle took off running, joining forces with four boys who were chasing the princesses in circles around the room.
Kids! Marissa called, climbing up on a step stool. Settle! Settle! Its time to decorate our treasure chests!
The kids werent remotely interested. At forty minutes into the party, theyd already participated in a half dozen organized activities, and I imagine their little brains were fried. I know mine was.
Marissa clapped for attention. The princesses continued to squeal and scream. The pirates continued to chase them. Timmy and his sparring partner joined the game, and even Elena got into the spirit, though she kept switching teams so that no one knew if she was chasing or being chased.
Throughout it all, Marissa stood on the stool, her hands cupped at her mouth, and cried out for attention.
After three tries, she gave up and, shoulders sagging, she came over to stand with Fran and me. She isnt usually like this, she said, her eyes on Danielle who, frankly, looked like she was having the time of her life. Not so Marissa. She had the mortified expression of a gourmet cook who was just outed as having a pantry stocked full of Hamburger Helper.
Theyre having fun, Fran said.
Marissas brows knit together. Its all these other children. Danielle is such an empathetic child. Shes tuning in to their volatile emotions and experiencing their need for shenanigans.
I know exactly what you mean, I said. Timmy often over-empathizes with his contemporaries following a period of close-knit socialization. It can make parenting so trying.
Marissas eyes narrowed as she stared me down, obviously not sure if I was being sarcastic or serious.
Fran, much quicker on the uptake, shoved two fingers in her mouth and let out a wolf-whistle, gaining the kids attention and saving me from the wrath of Marissa that would surely have descended once she worked her way down to the sarcastic side of the equation.
Marissa shot Fran a look of utter mortification. But Fran smiled sweetly and waved an arm to encompass the garage and all the kids in it. I think you have their full attention now.
Marissa managed a tiny har-umph, and I managed not to burst out laughing. Then she clapped her hands and gestured the children closer. Pirates need treasure, she said. So everyone come up here and lets sing the treasure song and get your treasure chest treat!
I had no idea what she was talking about until she reached down and pulled a clear gift bag out of a cardboard box at her feet. She played Vanna White next, showing off all the fabulous prizes in the bag including Glue Dots, plastic doubloons, gemstones, gold ribbon and plain, cardboard treasure chests ripe for the decorating. Then she did something that made all the other moms in the room cringe: She started to sing.
Fifteen gems on a treasure chest! Yo ho ho and were gonna have fun. Come on! Everybody sing! She repeated the song again, shooting a killer glance at Timmy when he bellowed the real Dead Mans Chest lyrics, punching extra loud on the bottle of rum.
I could actually use the rum right about now, Fran said dryly.
I was about to agree when Timmy came running up to me, one hand holding his gift bag, the other holding his crotch. Gotta go, Mommy! Gotta go!
Id better hurry. I plucked Timmy up from around the waist and hauled him into the house, the design of which was essentially a mirror image of mine. Like ours, a small bathroom was situated just off the living room in the hall leading to the study. I hurried Timmy in that direction, trying not to be jealous at the spotless nature of Marissas house. I told myself shed simply cleaned up for the party, but of course I knew better. Unlike me, Marissa didnt engage in the hobby of dust-bunny breeding.
No, no, no! Me go alone! Timmy said, when I stepped into the bathroom with him.
Sweetie . . .
Im big, he said, standing ramrod straight.
Fine, I said, figuring it wasnt worth the battle. Dont use nine pounds of toilet paper, and dont close the door all the way.
He flashed me a winning grin and toddled toward the toilet.
I sighed and fought off a moment of melancholy. They really do grow up fast.
Since Timmy can take longer on the toilet that any child in history, I wandered back toward the living room and idly perused Marissas DVD collection, surprised by the variety I saw there. Id pegged her as someone who watched only PBS and the BBC as a matter of principle, but the shelves were crammed with action films and raucous comedies side by side with A Room with a View and multiple seasons of As Time Goes By.
Had to be her husband, because I wasnt about to adjust my impression of Marissa. Id spent too many years convinced the woman had a stick up her butt.
You doing okay? I called out to Timmy, receiving a curt Yeah, Mommy, in response. About ready? I asked hopefully.
A pause, then, No, Mommy.
With a sigh, I reached into my purse and pulled out my cell phone, checking to make sure I hadnt missed any messages. That task complete, I moved my attention from the DVDs to the pictures hanging in the hall. I was standing there, gazing at a family photo I remembered from Marissas most recent Christmas card and trying to decide when I could schedule time for a family portrait at the mall, when I caught a flash of movement in the hall leading to the bedrooms.
JoAnn? I called, though I didnt actually expect her to answer. Marissa had mentioned that her oldest daughter had escaped the party by scheduling a date with the varsity quarterback to go for ice cream in Old Town. I supposed it could be Marissas husband, but I knew that he was out of town on a business meeting, and in one of the rare moments when Marissas facade had cracked, shed confessed to me that she was furious with him for not figuring out a way to come home on their babys birthday.
For a moment I wondered if hed decided to surprise Marissanot to mention Daniellebut that possibility shattered when the hulking figure in torn black pants and a billowy white shirt stepped out of the shadows and into my view. He had a thick scar across one cheek, and I saw the glint of steel in the knife he held pressed to his side.
His eyes went wide, and his lips smacked as he shifted something in his mouth. You. He grunted, giving me a glimpse of the red-and-white breath mint. Potent and minty fresh, I knew, to hide the demonic stench of his breath. Been lookin for you. Looking for the kiddies, he added, then laughed, as if that was the funniest thing anyone had ever said.
I wasnt amused.
Unfortunately, I also wasnt at all sure what to do next. I could hardly pull out my stiletto and stab him through the eye right there in Marissas hallway. Unlike in the movies, real-life demons dont vanish with a puff when you kill them. Instead, they exit the body with a whoosh, and leave a corpse behind.
I had a feeling Marissa wouldnt be keen on finding a dead body on her cut Berber carpeting.
Mommy? Timmy stuck his head out of the door, then turned and goggled at the demon. Whore you?
Arrgh! the demon said.
And when he lumbered toward my boy, I snatched my knife out of my purse and decided that Marissa would just have to deal.
Five
I rushed forward, giving Timmy a quick shove into the bathroom and slamming the door with a shouted order to Stay. Without breaking my stride I plowed into the demon, pressing the tip of my stiletto against the soft skin just under his eye, and slamming his back up against the wall.
Why are you here? I repeated as Timmy burst out of the door, shrieking for me. Stay back!
The demon grunted, and I saw fear in those eyes. An oddity among the demon population, but right then I was too on edge to think about it. Too furious that the demon had infiltrated not only my everyday world, but someone elses home.
Did she send you? I demanded. Who the hell is she?
II just c-come where they s-send me, he stuttered, and that time, my addled brain did process the fear. It also noted the strong scent of rum, not completely hidden by the mint hed been chewing on.
After that, I saw that the silver knife was a cutlass, and the hand that held it had a prosthetic hook dangling from the wrist. The black pants resembled something Johnny Depp might wear, and I was pretty sure Id seen that white shirt on the puffy pirate shirt episode of Seinfeld.
In other words, Id just attacked the childrens entertainment.
Dammit! I pushed back, switching my knife to my left hand as my right hand rummaged in my purse for the spritzer of holy water.
Mommy!
Kate! Marissas voice echoed behind me, but I wasnt going to turn around. Not for her. Not for Timmy. Not until I was absolutely sure.
I held the bottle up, then sprayed him full on in the face. He blinked and sputtered, but he didnt burn, and I managed to shove my knife and spritzer back into my purse before Marissa trotted up.
What on earth is going on?
She attacked me! the drunken nondemon raged. Sprayed gunk in my face and got on me with a blade!
Marissas eyes went wide. Kate?
Hes drunk, I said with disgust, scooping my now crying little boy into my arms. If you didnt want rum in the song, I figured you didnt want it in the entertainment. And, I added, digging the hole Id created that much deeper, he completely upset Timmy!
She looked from Timmy to me to the pirate with narrowed eyes. Then she leaned forward and sniffed his breath, managing to get in a good whiff despite the fact that Captain Hook slunk back against the wall.
Her nose crinkled and the glare she shot him would have taken a demon down even without a dagger. Unacceptable, she said, then turned away from him as if he were nothing more important than one of those dust bunnies she swept up so efficiently. But, Kate, she said, taking my elbow and pulling me toward the garage, if I dont have a pirate, what are the children going to do now?
Its just a suggestion, I said as I hugged my little boy close and dried his frustrated tears. But why not just let them play?
Oh, my God, Laura said, wiping tears of mirth from the corners of her eyes. Thats enough to make me wish I had a toddler. Just to have been there and seen that. And Marissa didnt even wonder why his face was all wet?
No, I said, scowling at the piece of ceramic tile our instructor had handed out to everyone in the Saturday workshop. She called me on it. Told me she didnt believe Id been worried about a drunk and thought Id been chasing a demon instead.
Right, Laura said. Stupid question.
At least he really was drunk, I said, abandoning the tile to share a frustrated grimace with my friend. Which alleviates some of my guilt for attacking a civilian. Not completely, though. I should never have gotten in his face with a knife, and my only excuse was that this whole business with Eric had put me on edge.
He was drunk, waving a knife, and coming after the kids, Laura said loyally. And he was sucking on a breath mint.
So were you fifteen minutes ago, I pointed out.
But I havent invaded a dead body. Im not all demonic and ooky inside.
Point taken. Demons, as Id instructed Laura, blend in a little too well with the human population. But there are clues, and sewage-rotten breath is a big one. Of course, not being complete idiots, the demons have tried to alleviate that little hygienic deficiency. And although they cant prevent it, they can work damn hard to mask it. Ive known demons to chew parsley, gargle Listerine, and even snack on roasted garlic. Anything to hide the real odor bubbling up from their decaying insides.
So, does David . . . I mean, with Eric being . . . Never mind. She busied herself by sorting the plastic tile spacers. Im not even sure I want to know.
Its a good question, I said. And no. His breath is fine.
Youre sure?
I remembered the kiss wed shared the previous night. Yeah, I muttered. Im sure.
Being my best friend, Laura knew better than to press the topic. And we were prevented from further delving into the quality of my first husbands breath by the distinct throat-clearing and evil eye granted us by Larry the Tile Guy. Since this was the scoring-and-cutting part of the tile class, I wasnt sure why silence was required, but I knew better than to piss off a tile specialist with a knife in his hand.
Actually, the silence suited me. Laura had raised an interesting point, and I couldnt help but wonder what it meant. Because Erics breath was fine despite the fact that a demon was bumping right on the edge of bursting free. So did it mean that halitosis wasnt the demonic barometer wed always thought? Did it mean that the demon wasnt as close to bursting free as we believed?
Or did it simply mean that in thisas in so many other thingsmy beloved Eric was a walking theological and metaphysical enigma.
You two ladies understand the steps? Everything make sense? Larry the Tile Guy asked, interrupting my musings.
Absolutely, I lied to him, unwilling to admit that my demonic mental meanderings had kept me from focusing fully on his tile lecture.
Why dont you give it a whirl? He dragged over a board with Saltillo tiles already laid in, with the exception of a rectangular void smaller than the area of a single Saltillo tile. Cut me that puppy there from one of the bigger tiles. Ill be back in a jiff to see how youre doing.
Right, I said, as he marched to a newly married couple whod recently passed around photos of their new home. I eyed Laura for help.
She held her hands up and leaned back on her heels. Im not the one being drafted to remodel. If knowledge comes my way, Ill take it. But Im not actively seeking it out.
Terrible attitude, I chided.
Isnt it though? She pointed at the bulky gizmo on the floor between us. Earlier, Larry had demonstrated how to use the contraption to score tile, then snap it along the line to form a smaller piece with straight edges. In other words, the machine helped break things. How hard could that be?
Right, I said, scowling at the thing. I scooted over to the tiled board and started to measure the empty space. I can do this. Since Laura said nothing, I took that as tacit support and made a quick mark on my tile with the provided pencil. So what about you? I asked, after Id made three marks and was rolling in the satisfaction of a job well done. Since I had to go tackle yet another demon in my backyard, I didnt get the chance to send appropriate sympathy your way.
Maybe you can get something to spread around your lawn, she said. Forget Miracle-Gro, she added, with an announcers affectation. Get some Miracle Go!
It would be a miracle if they did go, I said, feeling rather surly about the topic. Reasonable, I thought. After all, it had always irritated me when Stuart brought his work home with him. But maybe Allies relic-and-holy-water mixture would work, I said, thinking of the cemetery. Ill ask Father Corletti, and if it does
Laura held up a hand, stopping me. Ive been a good friend and put up with a lot, but I really dont want to hear about you spreading crushed up saint bones in your backyard. You end up going to those kinds of extremes, do me a favor and just dont tell me.
Thats what you get for changing the subject, I said. I was all set to lavish sympathy upon you.
You dont even know whats bothering me, she said.
True, I admitted, erasing one of my pencil marks and squinting at the damn tile, which seemed determined to trip me up. But Im an equal opportunity sympathizer. And you dont have the Paul-drama spark in your eyes, I said, referring to her soon-to-be ex-husband and the murderous look that crossed her face whenever she thought of him. Im gonna go with Dr. Hunk.
Yeah, well youll be going far and fast, she said grumpily. He dumped me.
Oh, sweetie, I said, abandoning the tile to grab her hand and give it a sympathetic squeeze. If he dumped you, he must be evil.
She managed a wobbly smile. He didnt seem evil.
Do you want me to take care of him? I asked. Stiletto through the eye. Drown him in holy water? I can do Paul at the same time and call it a two-for-one special.
She rolled her eyes, but she also smiled, and I looked down at my marked-up tile, secretly pleased with myself. Being a best friend might not be as flashy or dangerous as demon hunting, but the job was just as rewarding, if not more so.
What do you do now? she asked, and at first I thought she was talking about her potentially demonic ex-doctor. I quickly realized she meant the tile, however.
Score it? I frowned, trying to remember Larrys list of instructions. Right, I said, positioning the tile on the contraption, so that when I ran the slider thingy down, a slight cut would be made on the line Id drawn. Here goes nothing.
I pulled back slowly, wincing a little at the sound of the blade cutting through rock. Laura peered over my shoulder as I did, the ends of her hair falling into my field of vision. You know, if I pay attention, I could redo the entire house. Wouldnt even look like the same place Paul ever lived.
Its an idea, I said. But if you have the urge to tile, Im hoping youll head to the mansion. Trust me when I say I can use all the help I can get.
Mmm, Laura said. I think Im going to limit my help to the nonphysical. Research. Moral support. That kind of thing.
Wise, I said. You can start with my She-Demon.
No ideas at all about who she is? Laura asked, although she already knew the answer. Wed been over that ground and more during the drive to Home Depot.
Nothing so far. I told Father Corletti what happened, and hes looking into this Odayne demon, but so far he hasnt gotten back to me with anything useful. Actually, I amended, he hasnt gotten back to me with anything at all. I flashed a bright smile her way. But thats okay, because I have you. My super-research gal.
If Im your gal, I guess that makes Eddie your guru, she said. She rocked back on her heels, her expression thoughtful. And hes really going to do the alimentatore thing? she asked. Hes not just pulling your chain?
He was sincere, I said. Hes not going to break promises that will end up hurting Allie.
Well, this should be interesting, which pretty much summed up my feelings. She pointed to the tile. So now you snap it.
I nodded, pressing down on the padded lever to hold my main piece of tile in place, then using my other hand to press down on the overhanging portion. Id lined up the score with the edge of the metal box, and as I pressed against it, sure enoughsnapI found myself holding two pieces of tile.
Nifty trick, I said, shifting the tile to make another score line perpendicular to the first one. I took a few moments to look around the room. Except for a sandy-haired college-age student, everyone seemed to be moving at about the same pace. Which made me feel somewhat better at being both a novice and pathetically slow.
Our work area was near the entrance, and a few people slowed to watch as they came into the store. I saw a tall woman with gorgeous auburn hair holding the hand of a toddler with an orange carrottop and freckles. He looked about Timmys age and was yanking on the womans hand, seemingly desperate to get on with their day. She sipped idly on a Starbucks cup, hesitating near the automatic doors. For a moment, our eyes met, and I smiled, the solidarity of a shopping mom. She looked back blankly, though, and I began to wonder if shed even seen me. Probably mentally running shopping lists in her head.
So where do you think hes working? Laura said. Since wed rode together to Home Depot, wed both seen Eddie head off down Fourth Street, the local car-free promenade near Main Street. Unfortunately, Fourth Street curves sharply, and unless we got out of the car and actually followed him, we couldnt pinpoint his destination. Wed actually considered that as a plan, but since that would make us late for tiling class, wed decided to leave it to another day. Maybe hes doling out ice cream at Baskin-Robbins.
I tried to picture Eddie in a uniform asking kids if they wanted a cherry or sprinkles. Im thinking no. Besides, he said it was a new shop.
She frowned. My old phone had a web browser. I probably could have figured it out by now. But I gave it up for this old thing. She tapped the outer pocket on her purse, which held your standard-issue, telephonically functional phone. It doesnt do a damn thing.
I squinted at it. It doesnt make calls?
She rolled her eyes, looking remarkably like my daughter in the process. Kate, sometimes I wonder about you.
I ignored that, my thoughts having shifted to my missing teenager and toddler. Do you see Timmy and Allie?
She craned her neck and peered around, then shook her head. Are we worried?
I hesitated, then shook my head. I think its okay. Allie said she was going to entertain him, so Im sure theyre off doing something entertaining. Probably playing in tubs in the bathroom fixture section.
Or plucking the petals off flowers in the garden section.
Or emptying the bags of play sand all over the aisles, I said.
I lasted a good twelve seconds before I reached for my own telephonically functional phone and managed to call my daughter despite my lack of Internet and text-messaging capabilities.
Can we go yet? she asked, answering on the first ring.
About fifteen more minutes. If you want to start heading this direction, that would be great.
So you were just calling to check on us? I stayed guiltily silent. Come on, Mom! Were in Home Depot. Even if some demon was stupid enough to jump me here, its not like theres a shortage of weapons. Im looking at a screwdriver, an ax, and a sharp pokey thing right now.
Hardware aisle, I said to Laura. And then to Allie, Is that really the place for Timmy?
Mother.
Fifteen minutes, I said, and hung up. So long as the kid was entertained . . .
Does she know about She? Laura asked. I must have looked baffled, because Laura clarified. Does Allie know about the She that your backyard demon went on about?
Not yet. I havent had the chance to tell her. And I havent figured out how to tell her without mentioning her dads little problem.
How about Stuart? Told him?
I shot her a frustrated look.
Just saying, she said. You need to tell him.
I know. I will. But I want information before I do. I flashed her a wide grin. Thats where you come in.
She looked like she had more to say on the subject, but Larry the Tile Guy showed up. Excellent work, he said, peering down at my cuts. Set it aside and were all going to mix some mortar. Ive got tiles over there for everyone to pick from, so go on and get dibs on a pattern.
We headed that direction along with all the other tile warriors. Does Eric know? Laura asked. Who She is, I mean.
If he does, hes not telling me. I spoke flippantly, but I could tell from Lauras expression that she wasnt buying it.
You okay?
I wasnt entirely sure that I was, but I managed a smile. Peachy.
She looked like she was going to argue, but she didnt get the chance because all of a sudden a huge clatter rang out through the room, accompanied by the dispersal of hundreds of ball bearings across the floor. And there, in front of it all, was my little boy, racing pell-mell for the automatic doors at the front of the store.
Timmy! I shouted, trying to vault over the pile of tile.
Allies own shouts echoed my own, but when she stepped on one of the bearings, her feet went flying out from under her and she landed on her rump, a half dozen onlookers standing stock-still to stare at her, no one offering a hand because of the minefield that was the floor. Timmy! she cried. Stop right now or no ice cream!
The threat didnt work. Not so much because the kid was being disobedient, but because he was freaked. The noise, the people yelling. My kid was no stranger to a high decibel level, but usually in smaller quarters. And without a cadre of employees and customers converging on him.
Mommy! Mommy!
Timmy! Right here!
But he couldnt see me, and those automatic glass doors opened wide, and as Laura and I sprinted forward, all I could think about was my little boy stepping out into that busy parking lot and
Come here, kiddo! Lets go see your mommy.
I positively froze in relief. The redhead Id noticed earlier had scooped him up about six inches beyond the door, and was holding him close, pointing in my direction with a hand holding a Starbucks cup. I got there in a second, which was about a second longer than I wanted. She passed my boy to me and I clutched him close, my heart pounding in my ears, the roar of blood starting to die down around me.
Big noise! Timmy said. Big noise!
Mom! Oh, God, Mom, Im so sorry. There was a box and then he pulled it off the shelf, and those things went everywhere and Allie rubbed her rear, tears streaming down her cheeks, and as much as the fear that still coiled within me made me want to lash out, I pulled it back. All was well, I told myself. All probably would have been well even if hed made it to the parking lot. I would have caught him in time. Nothing to freak out about.
And yet there I was, freaked, and desperately grateful to the stranger whod waylaid my son.
I squeezed Allies hand, a silent promise that all was okay. To the woman, I turned my full attention. They can really get away from you, cant they? she said, smiling down at her own toddler, before I had the chance to say anything.
They can and they do, I said. Thank you so much.
Larry sauntered over and ruffled Timmys hair. Delighted at being the center of attention, Timmy beamed. We all okay over here?
Were good. Ill be right back. Im sorry for the disruption, and well pick up those bearings and
Nah, its cool. We got it. And I could see that they did. Already a crew was clearing the aisle of the mess created by one small boy.
Can I buy you another coffee? Lunch? A small continent? I asked the redhead.
Australia would be nice. Thanks. She cocked her head to the side, eyes narrowed in thought. You look awfully familiar. I thought so earlier, butoh, I know! Cutters studio! Youre going to teach that womens self-defense class!
Do you train there?
She shook her head. Im in that 7-Eleven all the time. She reached down and hauled her boy up to her hip. Im pretty sure he eats baby wipes and Kleenex when Im not looking, she said, and the little boy lifted his eyes toward the ceiling and shook his head in mock exasperation, an affectation so funny on a toddler it had me smiling.
I know the feeling.
Listen, Ive been meaning to pop in and ask about your class. Id love to sign up. Does it start soon?
Ive got a class at four, actually, if you want. Three Saturdays, and then Ill start a new session. Technically, the class was sold out, but I figured Cutter would give me a pass if I squeezed one more student in.
Oh, could I? She bounced junior on her hip. I think about him, you know? And I just want to be safe.
I squeezed my own little boy, clinging to my neck like a monkey. Yeah, I said. I know exactly what you mean.
Best thing to dos just grab em in the nuts, Rita WalkerFrans eighty-six-year-old motherannounced to a smattering of applause. Thatll show him whos boss.
Actually, I said, Rita has a point. The class was scheduled for two hours each Saturday over the course of three weeks, and though Id originally planned to open the class with a discussion of theory, basic awareness, and how to not project yourself as a victim, I soon realized that this group was keen to jump straight into the middle of things. Which left me altering my lesson plan on the fly. And well come back to that in more detail, but for the moment, lets go with it. I signaled to Cutter. Want to give us a hand?
Rita snorted. Aint his hand youre gonna be mangling now, is it?
Guess Im glad I wore a cup, he said.
But did you wear shoes? I asked, with an evil grin.
His brows lifted, and he cocked his head, knowing full well what was coming. Well, hell, he said.
I laughed. Youre the one who suggested I play teacher.
But I never suggested I play victim.
Youre not, I said. That would be me. I turned my attention to the ladies. Okay, now here I am, foolishly standing outside my car rummaging in my purse for my keys. Whats the first thing I did wrong?
You should have put them in your hand before you left the store or your house or whatever.
And you should check under the car. Could be some whack-job on his belly with a knife.
Both right, I said, continuing to pantomime a frustrated shopper. And here comes the bad guy.
I couldnt see him behind me, but from the cackles of laughter, I assumed Cutter had pasted on a Snidely Whip-lash expression and was creeping toward me on tiptoes. I continued to frantically rummage in my pretend purse until I felt his arm snap around my neck, pulling me close.
I reached back and clamped down hard at his groin, thankfully not doing any damageor embarrassing either of us too fullybecause of the cup hed had the foresight to wear. Thats not it, though, ladies. Youd think it would be, but I stepped back and down, smashing the instep of Cutters left foot and eliciting a howl from my injured-yet-helpful sensei.
I turned, flashed him a smile, and let the applause slide over me.
Okay, ladies. Partner up and you try it. Dont grab tight, and stomp down on the mat, not on your partners foot. I dont want any genuine injuries.
Now youre concerned, muttered Cutter.
I made a rude noise and rolled my eyes. Come on, Sean. Be a man.
If youd grabbed me any tighter, I dont think I would be anymore.
Im not terribly worried. As examples of the male species went, Cutter was a prime specimena blackbelt several times over, former military, and loyal to a fault. Hes also damn good-looking, a little fact that I think played at least some part in my sold-out class tonight. Buck up and help me make rounds, I added with a grin.
We spent the next ten minutes circling the practicing women, correcting form and helping them get comfortable grabbing and pounding with all of their strength. Yelling came next, and for that I actually recruited Allie from the childrens room. Since child care is often an issue with women, Id convinced Cutter to let Allie and Mindy come in and babysit. I needed the help, but Ill also admit that I was blatantly manufacturing reasons for the girls to get together. And as I poked my head into the kids room, I had to say that my evil plan seemed to be working. Mindy and Allie were sitting in a circle with the kids, clapping and singing about the farmers dog named Bingo.
Allie popped up when she saw me, letting Mindy take the spotlight. Whatcha need?
Come yell for me, I said. When Allie had first started her own training, Id demanded she work on her yell first. Most women think they can yell, but when actually put in the position, they manage little more than an anorexic squeak. With practice, however, you can learn to bellow on command. And not only does a nice, loud yell prepare you for fighting, it has the added benefits of potentially scaring your attacker, letting your attacker know youre not going to give in easily, and it alerts your Demon Hunter mother who is hopefully nearby and ready to beat the crap out of any demon who even looks at you funny.
We explained all of that (well, the relevant parts, anyway) to the class, and then had Cutter sneak up on Allie. In addition to whipping around and catching him with a solid crescent kick to the shoulder, she burst out with a yell loud enough to wake the dead.
Both moves earned her vigorous applause, even from Mindy, who I saw watching from the doorway.
So there you go, I said. Grab your partner and start blasting eardrums.
It was during that cacophony that the redhead from Home Depot rushed in, her eyes going wide at the spectacle. Her little boy smacked his hands over his ears and scrunched up his face, and since I feared for an imminent tantrum, I hurried over. Sorry! You walked in during the craziest part.
And the loudest, she said. Is there a place for John-John?
I smiled down at John-John and held out my hand. He made a face, but took it, and I nodded toward the back room where the toddler karate classes were usually held. Weve got teenagers amusing the natives, I said. I nodded toward Allie. Including mine once she quits doing the Rebel Yell.
Shes good at it, the woman said.
Im sorry, I said, sticking out my free hand. Im Kate. And I know John-John now. I flashed him another smile, but he scowled and looked away. Honestly, I was thinking Id found little Danielles date for the prom. But I dont think I ever caught your name.
Lisa, she said, her wide smile more than making up for her boys less-than-rosy personality.
I led her and John-John back to the childrens room, with Allie following on our heels. I noticed that Lisa sent the kid away without much fanfare, and decided that was another oddity with the child. Though they were about the same age, Timmys partings were much clingier than this little carrottop and, I have to admit, I think I preferred Timmys way. As much as there were times that the Velcro-child phenomenon could be an annoyance, at the end of the day there wasnt much I loved more than my kid holding me tight in a never-ending hug.
Class moved fast after the yelling session, covering basic things like using whatever is near you as a weapon, to me going through a quick dont try this at home sparring session with Cutter simply because Laura egged us on.
I missed the groin foot-step thing you were talking about, Lisa said when Cutter headed next door to grab a few more bottled waters, making sure we had enough to go round when class was over. Could you run through it with me?
Sure, I said, then pointed to the mat. Youre heading to your car, thinking about your groceries or something equally mundane, not paying attention to your surroundings, when out of the blue
I broke off as I wrapped my arm tight around her neck, pressing just hard enough so that shed know the fear of that pressure on her windpipe, but not so hard as to cut off her ability to breathe.
Mom!
Mrs. Connor!
Allies and Mindys cries rippled through the room, but I had no idea why because as I loosened my grip so that I could turn toward the problem, Lisa slammed her fist back into my crotch, grabbed the inseam of the loose-fitting khakis Id selected for class, and slammed me down onto my back. She was on top of me, her face right in mine, before my brain even had time to process what was going on.
And, with her mouth that close, there was no way to avoid the stench of serious halitosis hidden under the bitter scent of coffee laced with breath mints.
She pressed forward so that her mouth was almost at my ear. Fight back, and my consort will thrust that pencil through your little boys brain.
Who the hell are you? I hissed, keeping my voice low and hopefully out of earshot of the shocked members of my class.
Odayne is hers, she said, making me blink. Under the circumstances, Id made the snap assumption that Lisa was the She-Demon. Apparently, I was wrong. Hers? Whose?
But she didnt answer, instead thrusting a blade up high, and then bringing it flashing down toward my chest.
At the same time, I burst up, head and knees rocking forward as I jerked to the side, managing to off-balance her so that the knife that had been aiming for my chest instead sliced my sleeve and drew a long line of blood.
I howled, a loud, raucous noise, and my head seemed to split open into flashes of red and white as Lisa leaped off me, looking around wildly at the crowd. She kicked out and got me in the ribs, knocking me back as I was trying to rise, all the while screaming for John-John to join her as she sprinted toward the exit.
He raced forward, limping slightly, the irritated toddler face now clearly revealing the malice of a fully grown man.
Or, rather, a fully grown demon.
Dear God, Timmy.
I was up in an instant, racing to the kids room, realizing as I flew that the red and white lights in my head werent from a concussion but from the fire alarm that someone had tripped.
I had no idea who, but I was desperately grateful, especially when I found my little boy screaming in the back room, complaining about the big noise, and his sister fighting back tears as she clutched him in a bear hug. He had a pencil shoved in his ear and a thumb against his eye, Allie said, switching her hug to me as I clutched tight to Timmy, my insides gone to liquid. He was just a little kid, Mom. A baby.
I closed my eyes and breathed in the scent of my own babys hair, trying to stop the trembling inside me. No, I said. He wasnt a baby. He was a demon. And were all lucky to be alive.
Six
Do you believe her? Laura asked, as she moved around my kitchen, randomly opening and closing drawers and straightening whatever out-of-place utensils got caught in her sharp, obsessive gaze. That Lisa isnt the She-Demon, I mean?
Considering she was about to kill me, I dont really see the point of lying, I said, with a glance toward Timmy, who was amusing himself by whapping my clean silverware on the floor. So yeah, Im thinking shes only a minion.
A scary, horrible, freakish minion with a toddler consort. Ick. Major, major, major ick, she added, putting her back into the scrubbing now, so much so that I almost reached out and made her sit downher constant motion was making me jumpybut I understood the reason for her movement. Nervous energy. And Laura, for better or for worse, didnt get the chance to work hers off with a stiletto or a crossbow.
At the same time, Laura wasnt the one with her arm stinging from disinfectant. I scowled and rubbed my hand over the bandage, still more than a little amazed that not only was I alive, but that all of the women in our group believed my off-the-cuff story about how Lisa was a plant to prove the point that even people who are skilled in self-defense (that would be me) can get their ass kicked if theyre not constantly on guard. The lesson was so creative and brilliant, in fact, that the group gave us a standing ovation.
In reality, Laura had realized the knife was real, completely freaked out, and had raced to Cutters office and yanked down the fire alarm, thus accounting for the red and white flashing lights Id seen. The ladies, thankfully, had believed that was part of the fun.
As for Cutter, hed come back after all the drama was over, but when Laura was still hyperventilating. She okay? hed asked, and Id responded with the completely irrelevant comment that Laura was thrilled we were doing the class since it gave her the opportunity to work out her aggressions.
Divorce, Cutter had said knowingly.
Id nodded. That and the guy shes been seeing. Broke up with her, I added, in response to his questioning expression.
It may have been my imagination, but I thought I saw a flash of interest. Since my thoughts were more in tune with attacking female demons and their toddler consorts, however, Id paid it very little mind.
Now in my house with my thoughts free to roam, I had to wonder if there wasnt a little spark between Cutter and my best friend.
I didnt have time to ask Laura, though, because two sets of footsteps pounded on the stairs, and I heard Allie call out for Mindy. Would you just wait? Mindy! Come on
Come on what? Mindy retorted, her tone sharp. Come on and wait around while you make up some stupid story? Im not an idiot, Allie. Somethings up around here, but if you dont want to tell me, thats fine. Thats just fine, she repeated, since obviously it wasnt fine at all. Im tired of the whole stinking thing.
Mindy! Allie said, clomping after her. It was just some freak. The kind of freak thats the reason Moms having the classes in the first place.
I caught Lauras eye. Wasnt that the truth.
Just stay, okay? Allie continued. Weve got finals soon and you promised to help me with algebra.
You know what would help? Mindy shot back. Studying. Wild and crazy, I know, but maybe if you studied instead of whatever else youre into lately, you wouldnt need me to cram with you at the last minute.
Last minute? I mouthed to Laura, but I could see from her innocent expression that shed been impressing on Mindy that even months out from finals was last minute as far as she and their scholarship plans were concerned.
But you have fun with whatever it is youre doing. I already told you, Im going to the movies with Bethany and Emily. And with that, she slammed the door, just as Allie skidded to a halt in the living room, in full view of me and Laura, the misery on her face making my heart break a little.
Allie, I said softly. Tell her. I swiveled to look at Laura, who nodded once, then managed a watery smile.
Its time, Laura said.
Then you do it, Allie said, surly. She doesnt want to hear it from me.
Youre exactly the one she wants to hear it from, Laura said kindly.
Allie shifted from foot to foot. Shes going out. The movies. And shes gonna be pissed.
That youre doing something shes not? I asked.
That I didnt tell her, Allie said.
The longer you wait, the more pissed shell be, Laura said. And I think shell understand. At least give her the chance.
Yeah. Okay, Allie said. But instead of running after Mindy, she ran upstairs.
I caught Lauras eyes. That went well. I drew in a breath. Youll be in the doghouse with her again, too, I added. Laura had recently felt the wrath of Mindy when she and Paul had decided to delay news of their impending divorce until after the holidays. It hadnt been pretty.
Itll be okay, Laura said firmly. This isnt my secret to share. Its yours and Allies. Shell understand that. She moved to the refrigerator and yanked open the door, then pulled out a sticky ketchup bottle and began to rinse it in warm water. I think.
I sat back at the table, feeling no guilt that my best friend was cleaning my kitchen. We all work off our stress differently, and I figured that not pitching in was my little contribution to Lauras mental health and well-being.
After a few moments of scrubbing, she broke the silence with a sigh. That kid. She shivered. That little boy.
I know, I said. But you need to remember that hes not really a little boy. Not anymore.
Lauras eyes cut to Timmy, who was still making music with forks and spoons. I know. But knowing and believing arent always the same thing.
I pushed out of the chair and went over to my kid, who gleefully passed me a serving spoon so I could join the band. I whacked listlessly a couple of times, then couldnt stand it anymore. I hugged him close and was rewarded with his chubby little arms going tight around my neck. I like you, Mommy, he announced, making me laugh. I like you sooooo much!
Good to know, I said. I like you, too, Sport.
At least you have a lead now, right? You can figure out where theyre playing house, hunt them down, beat them up because you know you want to, and then learn everything you can about this She-Demon.
Not a bad plan, I said. Laura certainly had right the part about wanting to beat them up. But I dont have a clue where to start looking.
I do, Allie said from the doorway, making both me and Laura jump. Jeez. Antsy much?
Something like that, I said, then plunked Timmy back onto the floor. He blew me a big kiss, then toddled off to wreak havoc in the living room, the spoon still tight in his hand. I debated between following him to render safe my personal possessions or staying and listening to Allies demon report.
I chose the demons, and hoped I wouldnt regret it.
Allie slapped a printout from the computer on the table in front of us with dramatic flair. L.A. Times Metro section. Page five. Two weeks ago.
Laura grabbed the paper before I did, and since I couldnt stand not knowing, I got up and walked around to stand behind her.
Their deaths warranted only two paragraphs, though I supposed that if the world knew they were actually dead, the story might have been bigger. As it was, the reporter had simply transcribed the facts as he knew them. Apparently the real Lisa and John-John had been hit by a drunk driver in a Hummer going eighty in a thirty-mile-an-hour zone, sending the minivan into a violent rollover. The airbags deployed, presumably saving the mommy and kid despite the rollover and ultimate high-velocity crash into a utility pole. All of which would have been good news if the airbags really had saved them. But despite those fabulous safety features, I knew the truth. Mom and baby had died. And two demons had decided to take up residence.
None of which was reported in the article, of course. Instead, the newspaper reported that a nurse in the following car rushed to assist, found no pulse on either of the victims, and called 911 even as she began CPR. Her efforts, of course, were successful, and the paper lauded her skill and Good Samaritan attitude.
Me, I knew they would have come back even without the breaths and compressions.
Treated for minor abrasions and released, Allie said. The thing is, they were San Diablo residents. But the local paper didnt report it. She shrugged. So we missed it.
One of my habits is to review the daily paper looking for potential new demons. If I find any, I make it a point to try to track them down on patrol. Since I didnt know about Lisa and John-John, they hadnt been on my hunting radar.
Anyway, Allie went on, I guess when they got back to San Diablo they dug in and played good little soldiers until it was time to go shopping for a fight.
Despite the seriousness of the situation, I couldnt help but smile at Allies tough-guy Demon Hunter persona. I might have hesitated to get her involvedmight still be hesitating for that matterbut there was no denying that she had the skills and the attitude.
She clasped her hands in front of her on the table, corporate-meeting style. But what I dont get is how can that little boy be a demon? I thought they could only use grown-up bodies.
Whyd you think that? I asked, channeling Father Corletti and Wilson and any of a half dozen other teachers Id had during my years of training at Forza.
Well, because, because babies are
Innocent, Laura said. And you told us that the souls of the faithful fight. Thats why demons dont slide into every dead body that comes along.
Faith and innocence arent the same thing.
Dear God, Laura said.
I dont know the mechanics of it, I said, speaking briskly so that my thoughts didnt shift to my own little boy. Maybe children arent strong enough yet to fight. All I know is that it happens. But that dead little boys soul is gone and safe, even if his body is being used. And thats what matters.
But if little kids cant fight, then why dont more demons use them? Laura asked.
I shrugged. Limitations of the flesh, Id think. The demons essence is stuck with the body it goes into. It gets some of that preternatural strength, sure, but its stuck in chubby little limbs with an inconvenient center of gravity. And even if the demon can articulate and think and reason better than your average twenty-six-month-old, if it does any of that in public, there goes any hope of blending in.
So whyd this demon slip into John-John?
I dont know. Theyre obviously a team. Maybe those were the only bodies available.
Or maybe the intent was to get Timmy all along, and this was their top-notch evil plan. That from Laura, who was pouring a cup of coffee even while looking so seriously at me it made my stomach twist. Kate, why would they want your little boy?
To hurt Mom, Allie said, and I knew that no matter what, I wasnt underestimating my daughters reasoning skills again.
Lauras eyes met mine. Whoever she is, she wants you bad.
She? Allie repeated. The She-Demon you guys were talking about when I came back in?
I met Lauras eyes, then took a sip of my coffee and nodded.
So who is she? Allie asked. Does she have anything to do with Odayne?
I barely managed not to spit coffee all over the table. Odayne? I repeated. What do you know about Odayne?
Not much, she said. Eddie called and asked me to start some research for him. A demon named Odayne.
I made a mental note to string Eddie up by his toenails. Did Eddie say why?
He said the demons one of Daddys old enemies. Was he giving it to me straight?
As an arrow, I said, pleased to at least not have to concoct a complicated lie. So what have you found?
Nothing. But Eddie did say that Odayne has ties to some female demon, so when you were talking about this She-Demon, I thought maybe there was a connection.
Probably so, I said, then decided to bite the bullet and give her a bit more of the truth. There was a demon in the backyard last night. Wed sent it screaming right before you guys got home. But it mentioned Odayne and the She-Demon both.
She tossed her head back and groaned as only a put-upon teenager can. For crying out loud, Mom, why didnt you tell me? Were supposed to be all open with the demon stuff now, remember?
I remember, and I was going to tell you as soon as I had the chance. I managed a half-shrug. Its Stuart Im keeping the secret from.
Her brows lifted. Youre going to be in so much trouble.
Probably, I admitted. But its my decision. Dont rat me out, okay?
She lifted her hands in surrender. Youre the boss. I only work here. Her eyes narrowed. But thats it, right? Its only Stuart whos secret boy? Ive got the full deal? Because if you want me to be able to do research I need to know
The phone rang, and I jumped up, thrilled to avoid answering that particular question. I snatched the cordless, then sagged with relief when I heard the dulcet tones of Father Corlettis thick accent. Katherine, mia cara, can you speak?
Fran! Hey, yeah, it was quite a trip today, wasnt it? Listen, can you hang on? I left that paperwork you gave me in the bedroom. And the lies, they just keep on coming.
Of course, he said.
I signaled to Allie and Laura, both of whom looked uninterested, then took the phone with me as I jogged up to the master bedroom, locked the door, and then, for good measure, headed all the way through the room and into the bathroom. I knew Allie wouldnt listen in on an extensionwhy would she eavesdrop on a conversation with Franbut if she passed by my room, I didnt want her to overhear anything incriminating.
Secrets within secrets within secrets again . . .
Im sorry to keep you waiting, I said once I was perched on the closed toilet lid, the phone pressed to my ear. Did you learn something? About this Odayne dude?
I did, he said, and I could tell from his voice that it wasnt good.
Tell me, I said. Just tell me and get it over with.
I heard his long sigh, and could picture him taking off his cap and massaging his fingers over the downy tufts that covered his mostly bald head. Odayne is one of the oldest demons, and unique among the demon realm, he began. For one thing, his origin is shrouded in mystery.
His origin? I dont get it. As far as I knew, no one really knew where demons came from, though they had to come from somewhere since we knew that some were older than others. But the where and how of demon creation had never been satisfactorily explained.
When I said all that to Father, he grunted in agreement. This is true. But there are suggestions in the ancient texts that whatever the normal birthing procedure for a demon is, Odayne circumvented it.
Okay, I said, accepting that tidbit even if I didnt understand it. So that makes him different. Maybe thats why hes keen to bind up with Eric. What else?
Weve discovered a most disturbing fact, Father said. Even killed in his true form, Odayne will not die in the manner that other demons do.
But I began, then immediately closed my mouth, realizing I didnt know what to say. Fathers pronouncement went against everything I knew about demons. When they were in a human body, a demon could be stopped but not actually be killed. When you pierce them through the eye, the demonic essence is sucked out of the body. The body turns back into a corpse, but the demon himself isnt dead-dead. Instead, its simply returned to the ether, hovering silent and invisible as it waits for the next unwitting newly dead body to open up.
Since the process of body occupation isnt simpleand since time moves differently in the demonic realmthe dead demon cant just turn around and two seconds later pop into another dead body. Instead, a demon has to wait, bide his time. Which means that although there is a certain amount of futility to my job, the benefits of destroying corporeal demons outweigh the downside that the demons will eventually come back.
But its not all an exercise in futility. The holy grail for a Demon Hunter is to kill a demon in its true formwhen the demon walks the earth not as a human, but as the scaly, slimy monster that populates Hollywood films. The movies, in fact, do such a good job representing demons that I have to believe a few Hunters have moonlighted as Hollywood consultants over the years.
Kill that beast, and the demon is really gone. Poof, end of story. Theres no coming back for a demon killed in its true form.
That was one of the basic truths of my world, and now Father Corletti was telling me it wasnt true at all. Explain, I said, needing to hear him walk me through it so I could get the ramifications straight in my head.
Odayne can live among the ether with his brother demons, Father began. And our archives include records documenting his entry into the newly dead.
Okay, I said, dubiously. So far, Father hadnt cited anything unusual. But thats not whats happened with Eric, right?
Eric is experiencing the manifestation of Odaynes true form.
I cocked my head. I didnt much like the sound of that. Start at the beginning, I said. And go slowly.
To his credit, he did. Apparently, Odaynes true form gestated within a human host, merging and binding with it over the years as host and demon aged and grew. In youth, the demons influence was minimal, segregated within the hosts body and soul as a sort of demonic embryo. Then, in youth, that embryo could even be controlledfrozen, as it wereand the demon would remain in stasis. But if the stasis was broken, as happened in Erics case, the demon would gain power with each passing day, becoming harder and harder to push back or control.
As its demonic adulthood approachedas was apparently happening with Ericthe demon manifested more and more until it merged completely with the human, creating a vile and dangerous hybrid.
To be trapped and tied up with evil, Father said, his voice infinitely sad. I do not think there could be a worse fate.
No, I agreed, my throat thick as I spoke the word. I dont either.
Neither of us said it, but we both knew that Eric was on his way to that very fate. I wouldntcouldntlet it get there.
And if I failed? If I couldnt find a way to bind the demon or banish it from Erics body?
I shivered, knowing only too well what would have to be done.
I closed my eyes, and I asked the question I had to ask. Why didnt you tell me? All these years, and I never knew.
Katherine, he said, releasing my name on a sigh. How I wish things had been different. I cannot say why you were not told at first, other than it was Erics wish. I was not told either, and I am having my own troubles coming to terms with the decision of my superiors to leave me uninformed. I find strength in my faith, of course, but I am still human, and to certain things I would like practical answers.
In my bathroom, thousands of miles away, I nodded agreement.
I was never told the name of the demonI am not sure that anyone, even Eric himself, knew the beasts name. So your information tonight was essential. As for the more basic question of why I did not tell you once I knew the truth? I can only say that I at first withheld the information because I believed the demon to be bound. And later, when you gave your life to another man, there seemed no point in telling you things about a man who was dead and gone, and whose memory you cherished.
And when he came back?
When he came back, you had another family, did you not? And Erics secrets then were truly his own.
It was my turn to sigh. I didnt like his answer at all. Didnt like it, but I did understand it. And I still had questions about how the demon got into Eric in the first place, and about who at Forza knew it was there.
Again, Father Corletti said, those are questions for Eric himself. You and I will work together to eradicate the problem at hand. The problems of the past? Those are between you and Eric.
I closed my eyes and nodded, once again not liking the answer. But I knew I couldnt change Fathers mind, which meant I had to take what I could get. Okay, then. Lets talk about now. How will I know? I said. How will I know when the lines been crossed and the demons out and theres no coming back for Eric?
Ah, mia cara, that I cannot tell you. The most recent archival account of Odaynes growth was recorded in the year five hundred and twenty-seven. It is sketchy at best.
They always are, I said wryly. You said Odayne doesnt die when killed in his true form. What did you mean by that?
Apparently, he returns to an embryonic state, Father said. And he will find a new host.
New, I said. Youre certain?
Nothing is certain, but that is what the archives suggest.
I started pacing my room, trying to get this all straight in my head. I can live with another host, I said, probably selfishly. It might never happen, right? Or he might float around in never-never land for three centuries before landing in someone.
An unsuspecting child, I thought, then fought a shudder. I needed to concentrate on the problem in front of me, not a potential problem that might not even be an issue for centuries.
So we get it out of Eric, I said. We focus on that. Forget binding, thats a dead end. We get it out, and we kill it, and we send it back to the demon nursery to start all over again.
It was a solid plan, I thought, except for the getting it out of Eric part. I was determined to remain confident, though, telling myself that we would find a solution despite the fact that Forza had been working on that very problem for decades, and so had Eric. After all, we had a kick-ass team now. Me, Eddie, Laura. Even Allie if I could figure out a way to set her up as a research drone without letting her know why. And we all worked well under pressure.
Katherine
Hang on, Father, I said, in my groove. Eddie had to have contacts from his old days. Maybe some of them would have an idea. At the very least, it was worth investigating. And then I could
Katherine.
I blinked. Yes?
There is a way.
What?
A way, he repeated. There is a way to kill the demon in its true form. Forever dead, never to leech upon another human. Never to grow within another innocent child.
I bit back a curse, remembering just in time who I was talking to. But thats great. Why didnt you say so before?
It is a weapon, he said, though we have as yet been unable to locate it. We are hopeful, and our research and archival teams are searching for it. Priority one, he said, and I drew in a breath, duly impressed.
A weapon, I repeated. What kind? How does it work?
A dagger with a dual blade, the hilt in the middle. One thrust from either blade and the demon truly dies.
I felt a little trill of excitement that we had a solution, but that quickly burst when the horrible ramifications tumbled down around me. Wait, I said. What a minute. The body.
This demon must not be allowed to continue. If the means exist to eradicate it, we must do so before it claims another innocent.
Wait, wait, wait, I said, pacing frantically now. Just a damn minute. What about the body? The demon is inside Erics body.
Yes, Father said, his voice infinitely sad. Use the dagger to destroy the demon, and you will destroy the man as well.
Seven
Dear God, Laura said, then lowered her voice to a whisper. If what youre saying is right then theres no way to get Eric clear without killing him.
I nodded miserably as I pulled my knees up to my chest and hugged them tight against me. Allie had gotten bored with waiting and had gone upstairs to research. Since I wanted away from prying ears, Laura and I had adjourned to the back porch. While we sat in the nylon-woven lawn furniture, Timmy dumped handfuls of pea gravel from underneath his Playscape into little plastic tubs.
What are you going to do?
Im going to find another way, I said. There had to be an alternative. I couldnt bring myself to believe that in order to save Eric I had to kill him.
Did Father say there was something else you could do?
I shook my head. The archival references are so old that its hard to get any real information, but he did say that some of the really ancient documents actually reference stories of Odayne walking the earth.
People like Eric, she said.
Yeah. But they got clear somehow. They managed to break out of this entanglement. And thats key, I said, because we already know that Odayne and Eric are attached spiritually, not physically. So even if I kill Odaynereally kill himtheres no guarantee thats gonna break Eric free. Just the opposite: I feared that if I truly killed Odayne, then Eric would be trapped in some sort of dead-demon realm for all eternity.
And that was a reality I couldnt comprehend.
Laura leaned over and gripped my hand, hard. If those people got free, then Eric can, too. I mean, they didnt even have the Internet. Weve got Google. Well figure it out, Kate. I promise.
I managed a smile. I like the sound of that. Where do we start?
With what we know. She got up and started pacing. We know the demons name is Odayne. And we know that some missing dagger takes him totally out of commission. She frowned, a little vertical crease appearing above her nose. Actually, how does he know this daggers going to do the trick? I mean, it cant have been tested, right? Cause if it had been, then we wouldnt be worrying with this Odayne demon today.
I conjured up a wisp of a smile. Faith, Laura. Plain, old-fashioned faith.
One elegant eyebrow raised. Personally, Id rather have a warranty.
Yeah, well, that would be good, too.
She bent down to pick up Timmy, who had rushed over, giggling, and thrust his arms into the air, shouting for her to Pick me! Pick me!
How did it start? she asked, bouncing Timmy on her hip. I mean, how did this Odayne dude get inside Eric in the first place?
I dont know, I said, steeling my resolve. But Erics held onto his secrets long enough. When I see him tonight, hes telling me the truth.
I couldnt tell from Lauras eyes if she believed me or not. But that was okay. Right then, I wasnt sure if I believed it myself.
From the front of the house, we heard Stuarts car pull into the driveway. Are you going to tell him?
I shook my head. Lauras lips pursed together in disapproval, but she had the good grace not to say anything. Instead, she passed me my son, who clung like a monkey, giggling and laughing. Then she headed inside, returning a moment later with her purse and Stuart at her heels.
So, anyway, she said, sounding almost bored. Come over after you patrol tonight and you can borrow those knitting needles. As I gaped in confusion, she waved a hand. Hi and bye, Stuart, she said. Im out of here.
Knitting needles? Stuart asked, heading back inside. I followed him, even as I fished madly for an explanation to Lauras completely unexplainable excuse to get me to her house later for a full debriefing. Considering we saw each other regularly for absolutely no reason at all, saddling me with such a lame lie was really bad form. It would, of course, cost her.
Laura used to knit, I explained lamely.
And youre going to start?
Weapons, I blurted. Then I thought about it, and since that wasnt such a bad idea, I repeated myself. Weapons, I said firmly.
Uh-huh, said my clever husband, not in the least convinced. Ive seen the armory you keep in the attic. You want to explain why were adding knitting needles to the arsenal?
Were hunting with knitting needles? Allie asked, coming down the stairs with a yellow pad covered with scribbled notes. Why?
Stuart pointed at her, as if shed justified his very existence. Thank you. See?
What do you mean see? I never denied they were an unusual weapon. And I also never said they were for here.
Allie and Stuart exchanged glances, and I used that few seconds to rack my brain for a more detailed lie and curse my best friend, not necessarily in that order.
Not for here. For the mansion.
Were going to knit at the mansion? Allie asked. What? In front of the fire?
Very funny. Well keep them there. In a basket or something. With yarn. And other knitting accoutrements.
Because? Stuart prompted.
Because a basket full of stilettos and daggers and holy water might make Bernie curious.
That clicked with him, and I saw when understanding filled his eyes, followed by a slight curve to his lips I didnt quite understand. What?
Im just wondering what youre going to do when Lila asks you what youre knitting.
Lila?
Bernies wife. Im sure shell come over once or twice. And Kate, darling, he added, Ive seen the afghans she knits.
I frowned, but Allie collapsed on the couch in peals of laughter. No worries, I said. Ill tell her its Allies hobby. A neat little trick that not only saved me from learning a new skill, but had my daughter remembering just who was the mom in this family.
No fair!
Nope, I agreed. Not fair at all. And speaking of not fair, I added with a nod to her little brother, could you go give him a bath before dinner?
Youre gonna bathe him before dinner? she asked.
No, I said calmly. You are.
She shot a glance toward Stuart andthankfullycut off further argument. Most likely, she assumed I was going to tell Stuart about the demon in the backyard. But the truth was I wanted to talk about much more mundane things. Grown-up things. Normal family things.
And I wanted the time alone with my husband.
As she headed up the stairs I made a mental note to catch her before she came down again. I needed her to stay mum on the backyard demon. For now, at least, I was tangling my daughter in my web of lies. And the truth? Id been living with lies for so many years that that indiscretion caused me no guilt, only the slight twinge of fear that one day Allie, too, would be able to lie like a pro. Even to me.
I closed my eyes against the image, simultaneously proud of my daughter for what she was taking on, and horrified by what I was getting her into.
Stuart tapped my elbow, and I opened my eyes to find a glass of red wine in front of me. Life saver, I said.
Rough day?
Class, I said. The women. Some of them just get to me.
Too dainty?
I couldnt help the laugh. No. Nothing like that. I saw the curiosity on his face, and knew he was about to ask the details of my day. I waved it away. I dont even want to talk about it. Tell me about your day. Youre the one who probably really needs the wine.
The parting was surprisingly amicable, Stuart said, taking a seat at the kitchen table.
I took a sip of wine. Really?
Amicable, but unavoidable.
I searched his face, looking for regrets and second thoughts. I found none, but still wasnt soothed. There was no doubt hed done this for mefor usand I loved him all the more for it. The guilt, however, weighed on me. Youre okay? I asked.
He nodded, then reached out his hand for me and settled me on his lap. Im fine. I wanted this, remember?
You wanted the county attorney job, I reminded him.
He nodded. Do you remember why?
So you could be a big-shot political lawyer dude?
He chuckled. That was my primary goal, yes. After that, I wanted to help. To make a difference. He stroked the pad of his thumb down my cheek. I think I can make a difference helping you, too.
All right, I said, still not completely convinced he was cool with this change in circumstances. But youre sure youre okay?
This time, he outright laughed. Im good, Kate. Really. And now I have more time for the things that are really important to me. With a low growl, he bent me back and started nibbling on my neck. Like remodeling the mansion, he murmured.
I sat up and smacked him. Thanks a lot. I know where I rank.
At the top, sweetheart, he said, his eyes seeing only me. Always.
I started to feel all warm and fuzzy inside, and it wasnt because of the wine. I shifted on his lap, sighed when his arms tightened around me, and leaned in close. Does the top include health benefits? I asked, my sexy murmur mimicking his earlier one.
As Id hoped, he laughed. But he also nodded, which surprised me. I sat up straighter and stared him down. Really?
Its me, Kate. Im not going to do something stupid that leaves my family unprotected.
Oh. I frowned, trying to figure this out. So what did you do?
Im of counsel for Pete Tomlinsons firm. Real estate transactions, handling enough hours to ensure benefits, but not so many I cant work with Bernie. And fight a few demons.
Youve been busy. Apparently I wasnt the only one in the family who kept secrets. First the house speculation, which Id known was out there as a vague maybe someday kind of thing, but had never imagined that hed been working to bring someday into this year, much less this month. Now I find out hes been wheeling and dealing to land soft at a new job. I wasnt sure if I should be flattered he was so meticulous about not upsetting our household bottom line, or frustrated because he hadnt let me in on his plans.
In the interest of self-preservation and fairness, I went with flattered.
Pete knows it may be a temporary position, too. So if the development company takes off, there wont be any hard feelings when I quit to jump in with Bernie full-time.
Im really impressed.
It gets better. Hes actually thinking of investing.
Youre kidding?
Not kidding, but its not definitive. He knows real estates a tricky investment in this market, and although he knows me, he doesnt know Bernie.
Bernies a great guy, I said, thinking of the teddy bear of a man whod been friends with Stuart for years. Take the two of them out to dinner, serve margaritas, and then sit back and let the investment checks roll in.
He leaned forward and kissed me on the nose. Im so glad you said that.
I looked at him, not sure I liked his tone of voice. Should I be worried?
No, he said, but he said it a little too casually, and he appeared to be examining the ceiling closely instead of looking at my face.
I slid off his lap and stood facing him, my legs about shoulder distance apart, my hands loose and ready. I was, I realized, in fighting stance.
Flustered, I stepped back and tried to relax. What? I demanded. What did you do?
Nothing. I told you. He got up and went to the counter to pour himself a fresh glass of wine. I just invited Bernie and Pete over tomorrow night.
That did sound like nothing, which meant I was missing something, or Stuart was holding out on me. And?
And their wives, he said, almost sheepishly. Nothing fancy, though. Just cocktails. Snacks. That kind of thing.
Are you completely insane? I asked, my left arm going immediately out to my side to point toward the living room. Have you seen the state of our house? And I havent cleaned the guest bathroom in over a week, and Timmys been using it regularly, so if you think
Ill clean the bathroom, he said, far too reasonably.
Damn right you will, I muttered.
And the rest of the house, he added. Ive got tonight and tomorrow. Its no big deal. Really.
Yeah, I said, thinking about demons lurking in the bushes. It is.
Why?
Because . . . I sucked in a breath, frustrated that Id walked into that one. Because you dont just go and foist cocktail parties on people. I mean, it made sense when you were running for office, but youre not anymore, and you didnt even think to call? Maybe I have plans tomorrow night.
Do you?
Thats not the point! His lips quivered, which really wasnt the way to get on my good side. I poked him in the chest to accent my ill temper. And why do we have to have this shindig here? Whats wrong with Bernies house?
Im the connection between Pete and Bernie, he said reasonably. But if you dont want to have guests over, Ill work something out.
I closed my eyes, wallowing in guilt.
Dammit, Kate. Whats wrong?
Its fine, I said. Honest. Bad day. Grumpy mood. Its fine. Itll be fine. Chances were good the demon wouldnt come back, right? And I could always make sure Allie and Eddie were paying attention while I socialized.
Be fine? he repeated, his voice rising with speculation. And you dont want guests? What arent you telling me, Kate?
I started to deny it, but didnt. My husband wasnt an attorney for nothing. This just isnt the best time to have people over, okay?
Not okay, he said. Not until you tell me why.
Fine. All right. Okay. A demon showed up. Yesterday, before you got here. And today. At Cutters. I cringed a little and waited for the explosion. Instead, I got icy calm.
And you were going to tell me this when?
I was, I promised. I swear. But yesterday we were so focused on David that I honestly didnt think about it, and when I realized I hadnt told you, I wanted to wait until I had some answers.
You didnt think I might want to help you find those answers? Still flat. Still ice.
Im sorry, I said, knowing I deserved the dressing down and wishing hed raise his voice. Anger, I could battle. This calm unnerved me. I didnt think.
No, he said. You didnt.
He drew in a long breath, then put his wine down so that he could rub his temples. I stayed, Kate. I stayed because I love you. Because I want to make our life work, no matter how surreal it might be. He met my eyes, his firm and demanding. You shut me out once. Now that I know the truth, dont think you can do it again.
I swallowed and nodded. As dressing downs went, that one was relatively painless.
He kissed my cheek. Well make blintzes, he said. Well do it together tomorrow afternoon. Itll be fun.
I looked up at him, this man who was using the words blintz and fun in the same sentence, and all I could think was that even after all my deep confessions, he still didnt know me at all.
You should have called me, Kate, Eric said, his tone harsh and clipped, anger hiding hurt. A woman and a demon child approach you, practically befriend you, and then try to kill you? I think that warrants a call.
Eric
Dont even say it. Im at your side until this goes down, and right now, Im still me. And I intend to do whatever the hell is necessary to stay that way. He turned and met me dead-on. Im not losing, Katie. I fought for this body, and Im damn well staying.
I nodded, though his words sent ripples of worry down my spine. Hed fought for the body. Because the body wasnt his. And someone else wanted to take control now. Someone who just might end up having a hell of a lot more strength than Eric. Literally.
Goddamn it, he said, to no one in particular.
I wasnt trying to shield you, I said. And youre the one who said you werent my partner. Remember?
A hint of a frown touched his lips. Hed come back from a debriefing at Forza without having signed back on as a Hunter. At the time, Id wondered why. Now, of course, I knew the reason. Equal Opportunity Employer or not, Forza wasnt inclined to have a demon on the payroll. Even a dormant one.
They had you on before, I murmured, opening the door for Eric to tell me the full story. The story hed kept from me during our years as partners, our years as lovers.
He said nothing though, just picked up the pace, his eyes searching the dark.
I cursed under my breath and sped up. This night wasnt ending until wed talked, he and I. But I could wait. I didnt like it, but I daily counseled my little boy on the virtue of patience. Far be it for me to make a hypocrite of myself.
We were a few blocks away from the Old Town shopping area, just off Main Street, on a street lined with wooden-frame bungalows with cheerful gardens and brightly painted front porches. We both knew the neighborhood well, as we were only one street over from the house wed moved into a few months before Allie was born. Wed spent countless hours walking these streets, pushing a stroller and talking about nothing. Nothing and everything. And neverwell hardly evertalking about demons. Instead wed planned Allies future. Wed pondered the possibility of getting a dog. And wed had long, involved discussions about what color we should paint the living room.
Id thought we were so normal, like wed climbed over some wall and left it all behind.
Obviously, Id been wrong.
But we werent here tonight to reminisce. Instead, we were looking for a mother and her son. Two demons that I wanted to have a few words with. And then, yes, I wanted to drive stakes through their eyeballs.
Sometimes, its the simple things in life . . .
Stuart had wanted to come, had wanted to confront the woman and child whod attacked his wife and baby. But as he hadnt yet joined me on regular patrols, there was no way I would agree to walk him into what I truly hoped would turn into a combat situation. He wasnt happy, but hed agreed, and I had to wonder how many such arguments wed have in the future, and if Id ever be comfortable hunting with him the way Id always been comfortable hunting with Eric.
This is it, Eric said, nodding at a pale blue house with a six-foot privacy fence. We were in the alley behind the house, and I climbed up onto a recycle bin to peer inside.
Dark, I said. Probably rabbited.
Theyre probably crashed in a motel somewhere. We can check the flops along the highway after we patrol here.
I nodded vaguely, then hopped off the bin and tried the back gate. Open.
Come on, I said as I pushed inside and moved slowly to the back door. It wasnt locked either, and we went in carefully, falling easily back into old rhythms as we checked the house, covering each other as we made sure the structure was secure.
Theyre not here, he said when wed circled back to the living room. Lets go.
Wait, I said. I wanted to take a look around. If theyd been living in the house for two weeks, it was possible theyd left something behind that could help us. Information about the She-Demon, or possibly even a forwarding address. You never knew. Demons, like humans, got sloppy. And the longer a demon lived in a human shell, the more human it became.
Without warning, I thought of Eric, wondering if the demon inside him had been humanized. And, too, wondering if Erics humanity would come through should the worst happen.
But no. The worst wasnt going to happen. Not on my watch. Not if there was anything that I could do to prevent it.
What are you thinking? he said, his eyes fixed on me.
I considered dodging the question, but that wouldnt help either of us. Instead, I faced it head on. I need to know, Eric, I said. Everything that happened to you. I deserve the whole story. I cant help younot reallyunless I know everything.
What do you know? he asked, so calmly that I had to clench my hands into fists to keep from lashing out at him. Because what little I did know hadnt come from him. Id had to hunt it down on my own, pry it from other people, while the man Id once loved with all my heart and soul stayed as quiet on the subject as hed always been.
I know what Father Corlettis told me, I said. About how its been inside you all along. And about how the Cardinal Fire unbound it. The later stuff, mostly. The early stufflike how the demon came to be inside youhe said thats for you alone to tell me. I drew in a breath. Its time, Eric. Tell me what I need to know to help you.
We were in the kitchen, and he looked around, as if he hoped Lisa and John-John would leap from the cabinets and put a stop on this conversation.
I took his hands, pulled him until he had no choice but to shift on the bench and face me. Its me, Eric. Its Katie. Whatever you tell me, it will be okay.
For a moment, his eyes searched my face. Then he nodded, one quick jerk of the head before pulling his hands free and pacing in front of me. It wasnt an accident, he said, his voice flat, controlled. There was nothing surprising to them about the fact that there was a demon in me. Just the opposite, actually. Its what they wanted. Its what they planned. He spit the last word out with such vitriol I closed my hands into fists by reflex alone.
Who?
He faced me, and the pain I saw in his eyes about broke my heart. My parents.
Your parents? The words hung there between us, vicious and surreal. But thatsBut you dont know your parents. Dont know anything about them? Obviously he did, of course, but reality was about two steps behind my mouth.
I did, he said. I do.
Dear God. Why didnt you ever tell me? I hadnt meant to ask. I didnt want to sound whiny or needy or hurt. Especially considering we were no longer married, my hurt feelings hardly compared to the pure hellliterallythat Eric was going through.
Why didnt you tell Stuart? he asked.
It was a rhetorical question, of course. Eric knew perfectly well why I hadnt told Stuart about my demon-hunting days. Id married him as Kate, an ordinary widow with an ordinary suburban life. That was the woman Stuart had fallen in love with, and I didnt want him looking at me and seeing another girl.
Yes, that had probably been extraordinarily neurotic of me, but the heart cant always be controlled.
But I knew, I said. I knew about demons and things that go bump in the night.
You knew about evil, he said. You knew what it did and how it could hurt. He stopped pacing long enough to take my chin in his hand. And I couldnt bear the thought that youd look at me the way youre looking right now, with the knowledge that something dark is inside, that it was put there by my parents, and that one of these days, its going to come out.
Thats not how Im looking, I said, forcing my eyes to stay on him.
Isnt it? Its what I think when I look in the mirror every day.
Youre not your parents any more than youre the thing inside you, I said, moving to him and holding his face in my hands so he had no choice but to look into my eyes. Whatever is inside you, its not you. You can beat it back, Eric. You can and you will.
A troubled expression passed over his face. I used to think so, Katie. I really did. Do you think I could have lived with you, had a family with you, loved you if I believed that somehow I was putting you in danger? And I kept looking, even when we were living here, for a way to make it stop. Thats why I kept in contact with Forza. Why I met with Father Oliver and worked with Father Donnelly to become an alimentatore, he added, referring to other secrets hed kept that Id only recently discovered. And now I knew a little bit more about why hed done it.
He drew in a breath and continued. And doing all of that made me feel safe. Like I had it under control. I had to believe that, you know, because I could never have done anything to do you harm. Even after I died, he added, clenching his fists at his sides and then drawing in a deep breath. Do you think I would have sought you out after I came back if I didnt believe I could fight it down? Thats what I used to believe. Thats what I had to believe.
Something tickled on my cheek, and I brushed it away, felt the wetness, and realized I was crying. Used to think so?
Its winning, Katie, he said simply. I tryI try so hardbut its winning. He lashed out, kicking a cabinet so hard it not only made a dent, but made me jump.
Try harder, I said, angry now, too. Dammit, Eric, youve beaten this thing back before. You can do it again.
Every damn day I try. Every. Damn. Day. He drew in a breath, and I saw real fear in his eyes. I go to Mass now, and it hurts, Kate. It hurts inside like a fire is ripping through me.
I swallowed, not wanting to hear this. That was bad, very bad.
A demon can walk on holy ground, but it hurts like hell, and the longer they stay, the more it hurts. Thats one of the best tests, actually, for determining if a creature is a demon. Certainly its more accurate than breath, which could easily be present in a human simply because of poor hygiene.
In the past, Eric had no problems entering the cathedral, but if it now caused him pain . . .
I shook my head, wanting it to all go away. Wanting to fly back in time to the year Allie was born, when we were safe and Odayne was bound up tight, not causing trouble. Not doing anything.
But there was no going back, and even if we could, would I want to? Yes, Id been blissfully ignorant, but the truth was that even then, Eric was tainted, his soul entwined with a demon.
What if he had lived to a ripe old age? What if wed grown old, had grandchildren, and one day died peacefully in our sleep? I believed in heaven, believed in the tenets of my faith, and I believed that despite my lies and my secrets and my multitude of sins, that upon my death, my soul would go to heaven. And though Id never actually sat down and considered the parameters of my afterlife, I think Id always believed that Eric would be there with me. He was my first love so how could he not?
I knew now that Id been both blind and naive. Nothing in this world is a given, and that is true times ten when you walk in the shadow of demons. Eric wouldnt have met me in heaven. He was bound to Odayne, to the demon realm.
Bound to hell, unless we could find a way to untangle Erics soul from the demon.
Well find a way, I said. I dont care if I have to fight until my fingernails bleed and research until my eyes fall out. Were going to get answers, and were going to save you.
I wish I was as confident, he said.
Im confident enough for the both of us.
That sad smile touched his mouth again. Im glad to hear that. But youre setting yourself up for disappointment.
I started to shake my head no, but he took my chin in hand. Yes, he said. I know it. Forza knows it. And Katie, he said, the knife edge coming back into his voice, even your parents knew it.
What? The words seemed to swirl around me, a thick, viscous soup of nonsense. Im notwhat?
He turned away so that I was facing his back, and though I wanted to see his face, my legs didnt seem to be working. So I sat and let his familiar voice wash over me, telling me things Id never known and had never imagined. I was six, maybe seven, he began. Not when the demon first came insidethat was before. That was at birth, maybe even conception. But there were things that had to be done. Rituals that had to be performed to bring the demon out, to infuse him through me. To make us one. His shoulders shook as a shudder passed through him. I wanted to go to him, to hold him, but I couldnt move. I could only listen and hope that it wasnt going to be as bad as I feared.
I dont remember much, but I remember candlelight. And chanting. And the ritual cuts made into my back. They wanted to scar me, Katie, he said, finally turning around. They had to scar me in order to mark me, and I can still feel the sting of the blade digging in, ripping off flesh, and the feel of the salt in the wounds to ensure the scar remained.
Ive seen your back, Eric, I said. Theres no scar.
They finished only part of it, he said. A serpents head, fangs bared, forked tongue lashing out.
Its not there, I insisted. Eric, theres no scar.
His smile was thin. Its there, he said. Even if you cant see it, its there.
Eric
But he held up a hand, cutting me off. No. Let me finish. Because they didnt finish. They didnt bring it out, didnt twine it with me. Not fully, anyway. And not for lack of trying. But they were stopped. The ritual interrupted.
By who? I asked, though I feared I already knew.
Your parents, he said.
They were Demon Hunters?
Not with Forza. I dont think anyone ever really knew where they came from or how they got a bead on what my parents were up to. But they did, and they came, wandering the streets of Rome posing as a young couple on vacation. And they tracked my parents down and they burst into the ritual.
Intent on killing your parents, I said, following the story although I felt numb.
No, he said. Intent on killing me.
But
But nothing, he said. They came in. They tried to take me out. My father wasnt having it, and they fought. I dont remember it. I only know what they told me. But at the end of it, my father and your parents were dead.
And your mother?
Lived three days. Long enough to come out of a coma and tell Wilson everything, he said, referring to the man who would later become myourfirst alimentatore.
Were they with a cult? Did she tell Forza who they were?
She didnt have to, he said. He knew them. My parents were Hunters, Kate.
What? No. Thats impossible. Why would they do that?
They thought they were doing good. Theyd been working with Father Donnelly, and they thought theyd made a breakthrough. A giant step in this centuries-old game we play. He paused and drew in a long breath. They thought theyd figured out a way to castrate the demon and yet steal its strength. They didnt know what they were doing to me, he said, and I knew he had to believe that. Had to believe that his parents had only wanted the best for him because otherwise it was too painful to look at what they did to him, no matter what theyd hoped the endgame would be.
You were supposed to be some sort of Super-Hunter, I said. Stronger, faster, able to anticipate their every move. I frowned, realizing that some of what his parents had planned had actually come through; Eric had always had an uncanny knack for anticipating a demons next move. We used to joke that it was our secret weapon. Apparently, wed been right.
It wouldnt have worked, of course, he said, and your parents stopped it before the ritual was complete. But the demon was still inside me, and Forza needed to make sure it wasnt going to come out. There were rituals. Binding rituals. And they trapped it inside. Bound it tight. Suspended animation, just like in the movies.
How did they know what to do? Did your mom tell them?
Wilson knew, he said, his eyes dark. Hed worked with my parents, but pulled out at the end, tried to convince them they shouldnt go through with what they planned before I was born. And then when I came along, he said I seemed like such a normal baby that he assumed theyd taken his word. Decided they couldnt do it. He was wrong. And before my mom died, she told him everything.
I cringed, both from what his parents had done to him as from the hand that Wilson had played in it. Id trusted Wilson. Believed in him. And Id never once had even an inkling of a clue that he knew secrets about Eric. Or about me, for that matter.
And my parents?
Forza tried to identify them, never managed. But they did track them to a shabby hotel, and apparently they found something that suggested they were traveling with a child.
But they didnt find me?
You were found exactly where they told you. Wandering the streets of Rome.
And Father Corletti? How much of this did he know?
None, Kate, I swear. All he knew was that a child was found, an orphan. And he took you in. He didnt even learn the truth about me until after the mission in the catacombs. After I used the Cardinal Fire. He met my eyes, his sad. Thats when I learned, too. Because the demon was trying to get out, and Forza had to shove it back in. Bind it tight again.
But they did bind it, I said.
He nodded. Weve been over this ground. The demons stronger now.
Maybe, I muttered, my thoughts in turmoil. I stood and began pacing. You were so young, and you carried so much. You should have told me, Eric, I said. Everything we were to each othereverything we are. You should have told me. You shouldnt have gone through it alone.
I didnt want to, Katie, he said, his voice raw. I loved you, and I was so afraid I would lose you. He moved closer, only inches from me, and I took a step backward until my rear pressed against the kitchen countertop of Lisa and John-Johns tidy little house. I was afraid, he repeated. Afraid you wouldnt want me.
The breath hitched in my throat. Never, I whispered. How could you think that?
Kate, he said, and before I could think, his arm hooked around me and pulled me close.
Eric, no
But he kissed me, hard and deep and long, and with such pure need that I thought I would drown in the desperation of that moment. My hands knotted automatically in his shirt, and I opened myself to him, all while my head was screaming for me to stop.
I didnt. I took comfort in the kiss. Comfort in the familiarity, and comfort that this wasnt a demon in my arms.
It was my husband.
Except it wasnt.
My senses rushed back to me, and suddenly mortified by what I was doing, I moved my hands to his shoulders and pushed back. He murmured a protest and pulled me closer, a move that I countered with flat hands against his chest and a forceful shove. No, Eric. We cant.
His eyes, soft and warm, flashed with fury, and I watched, strangely fascinated, as he reined it in.
We need to go, I said, moving sideways along the counter away from him. Lets finish the patrol. I needed to get outside and get some air. Mostly, I needed out and away, and I went, not caring if he was following.
I was a block down the alley when he fell into step beside me.
We were married, Kate. You dont have to be ashamed.
Im married now. Yes, I do.
I heard him sigh and expected an argument, but none came. Instead, we walked in silence, moving through the streets and weaving down alleys.
Nothing jumped out at us. Probably good, considering my mood. I hated myself for my weakness with him, but even when I tried to shove that aside, I was left staring at the bombshell that was my parents. For so long, theyd been ghosts to me. Erics news drove home that theyd been real people. People with names and purposes and a little girl who I could only hope they had loved.
I was sniffling when Eric stopped.
What? I asked, my voice low. Do you see something?
Look, he said.
I followed the direction of his gaze and gasped. Our house. Wed circled through the neighborhood and ended up at our house.
Its for sale, he said, nodding at the realtors sign. Think anyones living in it?
Lets look, I said, though I knew we shouldnt. We crept closer and peered in the windows. Empty. No furniture. No people. Barely even any dust left behind.
Eric grinned, so quick and playful it tweaked my heart. Lets go in.
Are you nuts?
Probably, he said, then moved swiftly to the back of the house. He used his elbow to break a pane of glass, then reached in and flipped the lock, all while I stood there, mortified, not quite able to believe we were really doing this. I want to see it again, he said. I need to.
He stepped inside, and since I wasnt going to hang out on the back porch by myself, I stepped in after him.
The place was as I remembered it. The big kitchen with the glass-front cabinets. The huge pantry that wed rarely filled, being young enough to eat out more than we ate in. The black-and-white tile floor that had at first seemed so silly, but had soon grown on me.
I crossed through to the living room, and there my breath hitched. Eric was sitting on the window seat, grinning like a little kid. Wanna look?
Theres nothing there, I said, unable to keep the laugh out of my voice.
You never know. The elves might have come while we were gone.
I shook my head, but moved closer. Fine. Lets look.
He hopped off the seat and lifted the wood to reveal a compartment probably designed for linens. Wed lived in the house for two months before we even knew the compartment was there, so good was the craftsmanship. Once wed found it, wed acted like giddy children and left presents for each other at disgustingly sappy intervals. Nothing, he said, peering inside. Damn.
I smiled despite the fact that wed found no hidden treasure, because it reminded me of all the silly secret games wed played. Eric had always loved to share secretsit had even become a special game with Allieand it hurt to think now about the huge secret those smaller ones were shielding.
Kate? He was looking at me, watching my face, and I shook my head, forcing my expression back to normal.
Did you try the loose board? I asked. One of the floorboards inside the compartment had come loose, and one Christmas Id hidden his present inside.
He reached in and tugged the board out, then looked in the small space. Nope. Nothing.
Bummer, I said, then sat back on the seat next to him once he closed up the compartment.
There may have been no presents, but the adventure had cleared my mood, and now that we were inside, I knew that Id needed this little excursion as much as Eric had. Wed been a family in this house, and although I once again had a family I loved, it was nice to remember where it had started. After growing up with dorms and living in ratty hotels or even on the street when we hunted, this little house had seemed like a gift of normalcy. Hard to believe Id gone from being a street urchin in Rome to a suburban mom. But I had.
How, I wondered, had I gotten to Rome in the first place?
My parents, I said, the topic bubbling back to the surface. Someone saw them. Someone knows them. Someone at Forza touched their things. A hotel owner spoke with them. I looked at him, saw the sadness on his face, and knew that despite everything happening to him, his heart was breaking for me a little, too. Do you think its in the archives? Their stuff, I mean. Do you think Forza kept it?
I dont know, he said. I really dont. Why dont you tell Father what youve learned? Itll help you to know. What he didnt say was why it would help. If I was losing Eric, it would be nice to gain some history. To have some other piece of my life returned when one was amputated.
I managed a quick smile, though I didnt really feel like smiling. Ill do that, I said, although I wasnt certain I ever would. A part of me was curious, yes. But another part felt kicked in the gut. Id never been one to fantasize about my parents, but what little imagining Id done had cast them as loving people whod wandered astray during their tourist days in Rome and gotten mugged. Probably injured while trying to save me, and then there I was, alone and lost.
Never once had I imagined theyd left me alone to go off playing superhero. It was one thing to fight, I thought. Another completely to risk making your kid an orphan.
I frowned, realizing that I did that, too. I did it every single day. Maybe my kids wouldnt be orphaned, but
I pushed myself to my feet, maternal instincts warring with the need to protect, to fight, to do what I was trained to do. What so few people could do.
What was it Allie had said when shed first found out I was a Demon Hunter? That I was like a cop. Or a soldier.
And shed been right.
What I didwhat I was doing every single daywas right.
But if that was true, then why did it hurt so bad? Why did it feel like the parents I never knew had kicked me in the gut, said a big screw you, and run off to get themselves killed.
Shit, I held up a hand, warding off Erics questions and sympathy. I think were done here. I stood to go.
Katie. His voice was so soft. So Eric. And damned if the tears didnt start flowing.
Dont do this, I said as he stood, too. I dont want to go there. I dont want to cry on your shoulder. I dont want to cry at all.
He moved a step closer, his eyes dark and full of purpose. Whats wrong with my shoulder?
I managed a whisper of a smile. Its not mine anymore. If I was going to cry on anyones shoulder, it should be Stuarts.
Youre not your parents, he said, moving closer and backing me against the wall.
I couldnt help my smile. How do you do that? How do you always know what Im thinking?
Youre part of me, Katie, he said. You always have been.
And because I saw him leaning closerbecause I saw what he wanted and wanted it myselfI shook my head. No.
Were not connected? he asked, his lips brushing mine. You cant say no any more than you can stop breathing.
Eric, I repeated, no.
Hush, he said. And then he took my mouth in his, his lips soft but firm.
I pushed him away, shaking my head, not willing to go there again. I said no.
And I said yes, he spat, then jerked me closer. I gasped, surprised by the fierceness of his touch. Dammit, Kate, youre mine. And then he was on me again, his mouth crushing against mine, his teeth tugging at my lip, biting and claiming, and his hands owning me, touching me.
I tried to speak, tried to find words, but I couldnt, and when his hand dipped under my shirt and found my breast, I gasped not in arousal but in fear.
I bit down hard on his lip, then yanked my head back when he groaned. Let me go, I said, my voice firm, my fear absolutely hidden.
The hell I will, and then his leg was behind mine, pulling me off balance, knocking me to the ground. His shirt had come untucked from his jeans, and as he twisted around, I saw a flash of red, angry scarand it was in the shape of a serpent, fangs bared and tongue forked.
I couldnt even gasp, couldnt process that horrible image, because he was on top of me, his hands at the button of my jeans, and all I could think was that this was not happening.
It was not happening.
I kicked up, not catching him as hard as I wanted in the balls, but managing enough of a whack that he jerked up, and I got a good look at his face.
I gasped as I looked into his eyes.
I gasped, because Id expected to see the beast, the demon.
But it wasnt there. The man looking at methe man attacking mewas Eric.
Eight
For the first time in my life, I was terrified of this man, and I rolled over, clawing at the ground as I tried to scoot out from under him and climb to my feet. I caught another glimpse of his face and the shock I now saw there calmed me some. Id fought Eric before, and although Im strong, hes stronger, and the one thingthe single thingthat kept me from smashing a punch into his jaw and sending him hurtling into unconsciousness was the fact that I knew that if he wanted to, he could take me down in an instant.
Hed stopped, though, and now he was backing off, his eyes dark and lost and telling.
But that didnt mean I felt safe. On the contrary, I felt sick. Nauseated and, yes, afraid.
He moved forward, something dangerous flaring again in those beautiful eyes.
Get back, I hissed. Pull back, or I swear to God I will end this now. Despite my jumbled emotions, I pulled out the very blade that Eric had given me on our third anniversary. I watched him, forcing my hand to remain steady, as I searched his face, desperate for even a glimmer of the Eric I knew.
He took another step toward me. Back! I cried again, but this time I followed with a dose of holy water from the vial in my jacket pocket. Eric howled in pain, his body bucking so hard I feared he would break. But that wasnt really what caught my attention. No, what intrigued me was the telling fact that not a millimeter of his skin was scarred or in any way marred by the holy water.
Im sorry, he wailed. Im sorry, Im sorry. Im so damn sorry.
Eric, I whispered, horrified, but he pushed past me, running out of the house blindly toward the street. I followed, my mind whirling, my only goal to stop him. To let him know that I knew the truththat it hadnt been him, but the demon inside.
At the core, Eric was still Eric.
How much longer he would stay that way, I didnt know. I feared that now that it had started, the change would come faster and faster, spinning him round and round like a whirlpool until Eric and the demon were one, individuality lost along with any hope of getting back the man I loved.
I frowned, the mental image of the demon and Erics increasingly frenetic spinning dance playing at my mind. Wed been trying so hard to find a way to bind the demon or force him out of Eric, and while that definitely needed to be our game plan, maybe we should spend some time searching for a way to simply slow the process. Because if we could gum up the works and keep the demons tentacles from tightening faster and faster, then maybe we could buy some time to find answers.
It was worth discussing with Eddie, I thought, as I raced after Eric, stumbling to a halt as I reached the playground where we used to take Allie.
He had settled into a swing, his heels lost in the sand as he swung mildly back and forth. He turned as I approached: I saw nothing of the demon in his eyes. Instead, I saw regret. And fear.
Did I hurt you?
I took his hand, pressed it tight in mine. No, I said firmly, then followed it with a smile, because I knew he needed that. Absolutely not. Although if your balls feel a bit black-and-blue, Im afraid youve got me to thank for that.
Thank you, he said, with such sincerity it made me wince.
Eric
No. He climbed to his feet. I mean it.
Theres nothing to thank me for.
Under the circumstances, I think beating the crap out of me would be completely justified. A smack in the groin hardly seems sufficient.
You remember? I asked.
Every lousy second. He inhaled deeply through his nose, pressed the heels of his hands to his temples as if warding off a killer headache. Its like being trapped in a dream you cant wake from, only its much worse than seeing yourself walk around naked. Theres no control. Theres only consciousness. And impotence. The air between us seemed to hang silent and heavy before he spoke again, and when he did, it was with infinite regret. I would never hurt you, Kate. You know that, right?
I do, I said, though I feared that in the end, Eric would be the one who hurt me most of all. We really should go, I said, hesitant this time, as my last attempt to leave had ended with me pressed against a wall, panting.
He nodded, then started moving toward the street, his cane tapping the way.
We walked in silence until the weight of the quiet turned unbearable and I had no choice but to speak. What are we going to do, Eric? I considered telling him about the dagger, but the truth was that I couldnt bring myself to. If it came to that, then I suppose I would learn whether or not I had the strength to wield the thing. But I saw no reason to torment Eric with the knowledge that the people he loved were now spending their time searching for a weapon that will kill him, even though it wouldnt save him.
Apparently, though, my worry was for nothing, because it was Eric who raised the subject, surprising me with his soft, whispered declaration that, Theres a dagger, and it can end this for me. For us both.
My breath hitched. Do you have it?
He stopped walking to look at me, his face bland. Ive spent years looking for it, and I havent found a single clue. I dont even know what its supposed to look like, much less where to search for it. For all I know its a myth. Maybe it doesnt even exist at all.
I almost hope it doesnt, I said, my words a whisper as I moved on.
He matched my stride. If it comes down to it, you cant do that.
Do what?
Feel sorry for me. Fight foolishly for me.
Im not a foolish fighter, I said lightly, but he grabbed my arm, pulling me to a stop and looking at me hard, his eyes burning, and not with the light of demon fire.
I mean it, Katie. If it comes to it, you end this thing. With the dagger, with a sharp stick, with a fucking car key. It doesnt matter. But you end it.
Eric
Promise me.
Eric, please I knew I had to, but the thought ripped me to shreds.
Youve done it before, he said, and he was right. At the time, though, Id been confident that hed be free, his soul leaving this plane and finally, thankfully, coming to rest in heaven.
Now, I knew differently. Unless we found a way to untangle Eric from the beast, he would have no reward. He would, for all intents and purposes, become a demon himself. And what would that do to him? I wondered. Over decades, over millennia? Though his soul might start out pure, and though I believed in Erics strength, I didnt know if that strength would last for an eternity. And the thought of Eric sliding into the abyssthe thought of the father of my daughter becoming truly evilit was more than I could bear.
Eric didnt see all that on my face, of that I was certain. But he saw enough, and his own expression softened. You cant make this about me, he said.
Im not making it anything, I countered. It is about you.
I mean it, Kate. You cant let the demon live because you think that sometime, down the road, youll find a way to separate us. You kill that son of a bitch. Kill him, and let me worry about how Ill get free. Because I will. Somehow, eventually, Ill find a way.
I nodded, my throat too thick to talk. I didnt believe himhell, I didnt know what I believedbut I knew that he needed to believe I was there, his backup plan in case his internal struggle against the demon failed.
The hell of it was, though, I didnt want to be the backup. I couldnt, in fact, think of anything I wanted less. You fight, dammit, I said. You fight, and you dont stop fighting.
What do you think Im doing? he said, and his grin was so very Eric that I couldnt help the laugh that bubbled out, only to be cut off in a strangled sort of yelp as a small torpedo rocketed at me from around a shrub and knocked me onto my ass.
Except, of course, it wasnt a rocket. It was a toddler. A demonic toddler to be exact, and its strong, stubby fingers gripped me tight around my neck even as I tried to get my arms under it so I could thrust up and out and break its hold on me.
Off! I tried to shout, but it sounded more like a strangled Urlf! Not that I was worrying about my personal sound track; I was more inclined to worry about breathing. The fact that my attacker was a toddler didnt even faze me right thenwhen hands are closing off your windpipe, the age of those hands is not at the forefront of your mind.
But once Id managed to get some leverage and pry him off with a huge shove that sent him hurtling back onto the sidewalk, the similarities between him and Timmy washed over me. The little bastard was wearing a Disneyland T-shirt, for Gods sake! Id put Timmy in one exactly like that this morning, and while I had my knife ready, and my mind was telling me to take out the lying little bastard, those damned maternal hormones were slowing my hand.
Eric, I saw, had no such compunction.
He leaped, tackling the toddler with every ounce of strength in his body, and then beating on the thing with fists that wouldnt stop no matter how much I yelled out for him to do just that. His shirt rode up as he pummeled the kid, and the scar Id seen earlier seemed to pulse in the thin light of the streetlamps.
My eyes scanned the area as lights came on from nearby houses, and I feared that wed soon hear the shrill siren of police cars, and see the red-and-white flash of lights filling the alley.
Dammit, Eric! Stop! Though right then, I wasnt at all certain whether I was speaking to Eric or the beast inside him.
I was in tears by the time hed finished tormenting the demon, and finally did what he should have done right offslide the razor-sharp point of his favorite stiletto into the demon childs eye.
He let go of the body, watching with flat eyes as it dropped to the ground. He toed the body over so that it lay facedown, and I shivered, colder still when he lifted his face to look dispassionately at me.
Eric, I whispered. Please. It was a child.
It was a demon, he said. And then he turned and walked away, leaving me alone with the body and my thoughts.
A California coastal town, San Diablo boasts both beaches and mountains. Or, more specifically, beaches and craggy foot-hills of mountains. The towns origin dates back to the California missions, and even before San Diablo took that name, the cathedral sat tall and proud at the top of the cliffs, a focal point for what later became the rather artsy, sleepy town of San Diablo.
Id hoped to see Eric at Mass, as his presence there would mean that the demon had fully retreated inside of him. And that, of course, was the reason I kept twisting in my seat to scour the crowded pews. After the third such acrobatic move, Stuart elbowed me and asked me what I was up to. Since I didnt want to remind him of Erics condition (not that I expected him to forget) I muttered an apology and fixed my eyes on the bishop.
The truth was, though, that Id rather be distracted than listen to Mass. Not a particularly devout state of mind, Ill admit, but not one I could shake, not when I used to sit on these very pews and listen to Father Ben celebrate the Mass and deliver his homily. I closed my eyes tight, and felt Allie squeeze my hand. Even Timmy hugged me, his little hands pressing against my face, and though I held my breath and waited for the tantrum, it didnt come.
Little miracles, I thought. They were around me every day.
But it wasnt a little miracle I needed in my life right then.
It was a big one.
And since I was in a church, I closed my eyes and prayed.
After communion, Timmys good behavior wore out, little miracles being limited by their very definition. Fortunately, the tantrum didnt come, but the squirming did. Along with the kicking and the whispering and the whining. In light of a few rotating heads giving me the evil eye (the nondemonic sort), I decided to take Timmy out. I hauled him up so that he clung like a monkey, walked gingerly over Allies feet, and made my way up the aisle, quietly shooshing my little boy, who now insisted that he didnt want to leave.
The moment I stepped through the heavy doors and into the narthex, I saw Eddie, lounging by a bulletin board announcing a fellowship brunch after Mass in the Bishops Hall. Though Catholic, Mass hasnt been tops on Eddies priority list in a long while, definitely not since Ive known him. My immediate reaction was fear, and I hurried to him with a What? Whats happened?
Dont get your panties in a wad, he said. Just trying to do my job. Both of em.
Both of them?
He hooked a finger toward the parking lot. Got Rita out there. Shes gonna give me a lift to work.
Rita? You mean Frans mother?
Dont know any Fran, but Rita said she was in your class yesterday. Dropped by the shop after. Said she was window-shopping, but didnt buy anything. He leaned in closer, his brows waggling. Personally, I think she just wanted to pick me up.
I agreed, but didnt tell him so.
And now shes giving you lifts around town? You two only met yesterday.
He snorted. At our age, you think we want to waste time? He waggled his brows. Gonna take her for dinner and a walk on the beach after. So dont wait up.
I swallowed a laugh, but had to give Rita credit. The woman knew what she wanted, that was for sure.
Ushers pushed open the doors to the sanctuary, and the parishioners started filing out. I eased closer to Eddie as Timmy wiggled to get down, then spread his arms wide and started zooming around me in an impression of a jet. So what have you learned? I asked, because as fascinated as I was by both Rita and Eddies mysterious new job, I was primarily interested in his new employment as my alimentatore.
Eddie, however, wasnt talking. At least not to me. Instead, he addressed the air over my shoulder, telling Blintz boy to head on outside and take the rugrat with him.
I turned to find Stuart standing behind me, a scowl on his face. I asked Eddie to be my temporary alimentatore, I explained.
And I got business to discuss with your lady. And a schedule to keep. You want to get a move on?
Kate Stuart began.
I pushed Timmy toward him. Justplease.
Im not sure if it was the plea in my voice, the exasperation on my face, or his irritation with Eddie in general, but Stuart kissed me on the cheek, scooped up Timmy so that his plane became airborne, and headed toward the main door to shake the bishops hand. I crossed my arms over my chest and silently dared Eddie not to get straight to the point.
This dagger, he began. Forzas just started looking for that, right?
Right, I said. Father Corletti told me that they didnt know the name of the demon within Eric until now. And apparently this daggers unique to Odayne. So no one would have been searching for it before. A problem, of course, since millennia-old daggers dont tend to be easily discoverable on eBay. Not that I particularly wanted the daggerI still wasnt convinced Id be able to use itbut I was smart enough to know that no matter what was going to happen, I at least needed to have every known weapon in my arsenal.
But thats the thing, aint it? Eddie asked.
Thing? I repeated, playing back the conversation in my mind as I wondered where we went astray. What are you talking about?
Eric, he said. Just because Forza wasnt looking doesnt mean Eric wasnt.
Looking for what? Allie said, making me jump a mile.
I thought I saw you go out with Stuart, I said, sounding more accusatory than I meant to.
She shrugged. I came back. Whats the big?
There was, I assured her, no big at all. But as for what we were talking about, I had no clever response. Eddie, however, was winning big-time alimentatore points. That demon thats been dogging your dad, he said. Apparently theres a dagger thatll take the bugger out for good.
Odayne, Allie said. So far I havent found anything about him. She shot me a smirk. Ive got homework that has to come first.
Actually, this one may be hot, I said. Bump it up for a week, and if we havent made progress, youll still have time to cram.
Wait. What? My mother? My mother is telling me to blow off studying?
Not blow off, I said. Just reprioritize. Grades and school and all that stuff were important, of course. And while I had no desire to sacrifice her grades or her college chances, I also wasnt willing to sacrifice her father.
More than that, I knew that she wouldnt be willing to, either.
And while I may not have told her why she was researching, if she did know, I was certain she would shove schoolwork aside in a heartbeat. Which meant that if she later found out the truth about her dad, and learned that I hadnt prioritized this work, then Id be in even more trouble.
I sighed, absolutely stymied. Id promised my family open and honest, but right then I simply didnt see the way to pull that off. Not without breaking young hearts that didnt deserve to be broken.
Allie was still looking at me with arms crossed over her chest and eyes narrowed in disbelief.
What? I demanded.
You tell me.
I closed my eyes and drew in a deep breath, suddenly tired of the whole thing. I want answers, Allie, is that so hard to understand? And as much as I wish it werent always true, youre better at finding them than Laura.
But school, she pressed. Theres something else going on, Mom. You need to tell me. You know Im going to figure it out, and
Just stop it, I snapped, making both her and Eddie jump. I already told you the demons important to your dad and may be back in town. And if thats not reason enough for you to think it should be priority, then Ill just take the assignment and give it to Laura and you can spend the next week redoing all your homework for the year so that you nail your finals cold. But if you want to help, then do it. Dont question it. Dont analyze it. Just do it. Because I need answers, Al. Im not going to be late again. Im not going to lose someone else on my watch.
The words flooded out, along with the tears. And although I managed not to raise my voice, we still caught a few looks from stragglers in the narthex.
To my shame, Allie looked completely chastised, and as she moved to put her arms around me, she glanced through the now-open doors to the altar. She was, I knew, thinking about Father Ben. And although Id started my speech only hoping to convince her to drop her line of questioning, Id ended up there, too, only realizing after the fact how much of the truth I spoke.
I missed him terribly, and Id known the man for less than one year.
Id lost him. I was the Demon Hunter in town, and hed died on my watch.
I felt responsible because I was responsible.
And there was no way in hell I was losing Eric, too.
I couldnt.
I wouldnt.
Problem was, I didnt know how to save him.
Im sorry, Mom. I wasnt thinking.
I returned the tight hug shed wrapped me in. Its okay, baby. Sometimes its raw all over again. I felt her nod, and kissed the top of her head. Head on out and help Stuart with Timmy, okay? Ill be just another minute.
Kay.
And tell Rita Ill be right there. Shes in a red Miata convertible, Eddie said as Allies eyes widened. Cant miss her.
The Padre wasnt your fault, girlie, Eddie said, once Allie was out of earshot. And Eric aint neither.
I know that.
He worked his mouth as he considered me, then blew out a loud breath. We need him. Hate to admit it, but were gonna need that boys help.
No, I said, despite the weight of disloyalty in my gut. Nothing would ever change the fact that I loved Eric, but after what had happened last night, I no longer trusted him. And I certainly didnt trust his ability to keep things secret from Odayne. If we are plotting Odaynes downfall, were going to do it without Eric looking on.
I saw respect in his eyes when Eddie nodded at me. Finally getting to the truth, aint you, girl? I started to answer, but he waved me off. I said we needed Eric. I didnt say we were going to call him up and have him come over for a planning session.
What then?
Hes known about this for how long? His whole life, almost, right?
Since we were teenagers. Since the Cardinal Fire unbound the demon the first time.
And Erics a smart boy, right? Hed be looking for ways, keeping his eyes open, studying myths and legends and hoping to find facts. Hoping to find a way to get rid of the demon inside.
Sure.
Interesting career he chose after quitting the hunting life.
I cocked my head, finally clueing in to where Eddie was going. Because Eric had worked as a rare books librarian, filling the San Diablo County Librarynot to mention his denwith fascinating and unique works, all of which hed handpicked.
And if we were lucky, one of his handpicked books held the answers we needed.
Nine
But if the answer was in his books, wouldnt he have already found it? Laura asked.
We were back at the house, with Allie tucked away upstairs and Stuart and Laura at the kitchen table. Laura was looking thoughtfully at me while Stuart had his nose buried in the newspaper.
Not necessarily, I said. Eric bought a lot of books. I dont think theres any way he could have gone through all of them.
And even if he did, Stuart said, peering at us over the top of the paper, its possible he missed it the first time around.
Eric was pretty good at this research stuff, I said, feeling foolishly overprotective of my now-demonic first husbands skills.
I meant he might have been made to overlook it, Stuart clarified. We have no idea how far the demons influence reaches.
Leave it to the lawyer to suggest the worst-case scenario, Laura said with a grimace.
Way worst-case, I said. The demon was bound back then. It only started to get some serious power after Eric came back inside David, and then even more when I used the Lazarus Bones to bring him back. I clenched my hands at my sides, determined not to kick myself any more about that. My ass was already black-and-blue, and as everyone from Stuart to Father Corletti had told me, Erics present circumstances were not my fault.
But not bound tight, Stuart said. Right?
Maybe, I said, feeling surly because he was right.
I heard a clomp-clomp on the living room floor, and tensed, because it didnt sound like any noise that would normally be moving through my house. Laura saw me, and clutched the edge of the table. What is it?
I shook my head, and put my finger over my lips as I stood up, then moved around the table so that I could see into the living room.
What I saw, just about laid me out flat on the floor. But this time, with humor, not fear.
My little boy, completely naked, except for a pair of black pumps, one of my evening bags, and a smear of red lipstick over his mouth. He looked up at me and smiled. I go shopping! he announced even as I heard a rap at the back door.
I turned and saw Mindy, her hand over her mouth to hold back a laugh. I gestured for her to come in, and she did, her eyebrows midway up her forehead. Its a good look for him, Aunt Kate, she said. Maybe you should tie a red bow to his little
Mindy!
She had the good grace to look embarrassed. Maybe not.
Honestly, I said, refusing to admit out loud that her suggestion was extremely camera-worthy. For that matter, I was deeply regretting not having my own camera handy and charged up. If nothing else, this would be the perfect photo to pull out on prom night.
You looking for your mom? I asked, as Timmy started shaking his butt and announcing that he was dancing.
Allie, she said. If you think shell
Allie! I called up the stairs. Come on down here.
Her Just a sec! floated toward us, followed by the elephantine pounding of feet as she clambered down the stairs, skidding to a stop midway across the living room. She shoved her hands in her pockets. Hey.
Hey. Mindy stared at the floor. So, um, I was thinking that since your parents are having this party thing tonight that maybe we should bribe my mom to let us rent something from Blockbuster and eat popcorn and Chips Ahoy. She looked up at me. I mean, if it would be okay with
Fine, I snapped off, mentally crossing my fingers. Totally fine. I hooked my thumb back toward the breakfast area, then headed that way. Im just going to go check on the stuff, I said lamely, then disappeared, Allies eyes burning a hole in my back.
Since you cant see the part of the living room where the girls were standing from the breakfast table, eavesdropping was easy, as Laura and Stuart had already figured out. Both were absolutely silent and leaning slightly toward the wall, and as much as I wanted to take the moral high ground and give them both a dressing down for not giving the girls their privacy, I couldnt do it. I was too curious myself. And so we all sat silently, listing slightly toward the wall, as our daughters voices slowly rose in pitch and volume.
But your mom said it was okay.
Yeah, but thats because shes not thinking, shes already told me my priority needs to be
What? Mindy demanded. Oh. School, right? Was she totally pissed about the grade on your Her voice dropped, as if she remembered that we could hear everything, and I had to wonder what new project Allie had given short shrift.
There was a long pause as they batted around a few conversational volleys that we couldnt hear, and then Mindys voice rose again. how Im supposed to understand if you wont tell me what youre doing?
Im researching demons, okay? Is that what you want to hear?
I froze, and I saw that Stuart and Laura had done the same. We looked at each other, not breathing, and waited for the other shoe to drop.
When it did, it was hardly the explosion Id expected.
God, said Mindy, this is your big secret? That youre into those stupid Internet role-playing games? I mean, just because theyre not my thing doesnt mean you have to hide them from me. I mean, God, Allie. You want to give me a little more credit?
Maybe you need to give me more credit, Allie shot back. And its not stupid. If you knew anything at all about what I do
Fine. Then show me. Let me log on as Morgana the fairy princess and you can show me what youre doing in your spare time now thats so freaking important you blow off your friends. Cause you are, you know. I wasnt even going to come over today, but I miss you, and youre being a total bitch, and Im tired of it.
I could hear the tears in Mindys voice and moved my hand to cover Lauras, who looked about ready to leap up from the chair and go comfort her offspring.
You want to know more about what Im doing? Fine. I heard the stomping of feet, and then Allies voice from farther away. So, are you coming, or what?
When theyd both trampled upstairs and we heard the door snap shut, I breathed again. Think itll do any good? Laura said.
I guess well know soon enough. I cocked my head, half of me expecting Mindy to run terrified down the stairs, the other half expecting to hear her indignant cry that Allie was a royal bitch for playing with her.
But I heard nothing. And I honestly couldnt decide if that was good or bad.
Cookies, Laura said, standing up and going to my freezer. I think the occasion calls for them. Laura has a tendency to bake when shes nervous. Considering she was in my poorly stocked kitchen rather than her own, though, she was obviously willing to settle for slice and bake. She pulled out a cookie sheet, then opened the freezer and started rummaging for dough while I remained at the table, a dozen things on my mind.
Frustrated, I smacked at Stuarts newspaper with my fork. Well?
Well, we have a plan, he said. Youve got some of Erics old books in the attic, right? Laura and I can start perusing them, and
You and Laura? What about me?
As much as I hate to say it, I assumed that youd take the more direct approach and talk to Eric himself. At the very least, you need to be out patrolling. No matter what Eric did to the little boy, the mothers still hovering.
Shes not really the mother, I said with a shudder even as my eyes cut involuntarily to the picture window in our breakfast room. The thought that Lisa might be out there right now, sneaking silently around my backyard, both creeped me out and pissed me off.
Heres something interesting, Stuart said, laying the paper down and tapping a headline in the Metro section.
I peered over, and skimmed the article upside down. Mr. Albert Preston, one of the residents of the Coastal Mists Nursing Home, had a heart attack during an organized shopping trip to the mall. The paramedic who arrived on scene had been about to call time of death when life miraculously shuddered back into the old man. Naturally, everyone was thrilled.
I grimaced, but Stuart only beamed. Sounds like a demon, doesnt it?
Yeah, I conceded, it does. Id hunted more than a few demons bred at Coastal Mists. For a while, the place had been a veritable demon factory. That had slowed down, thankfully, and more recently my visits to the nursing home on the cliff had been tame. I still kept a presence at the placeI went in regularly to read aloud to the residents and get a whiff of their breathbut lately nothing had gone awry.
So we go tonight? Stuart said, as I goggled at him.
Tonight? I repeated, trying to decide the most politic way of telling my husband he wasnt ready for the real thing. In case you forgot, we have company coming. And whats with the we?
Is this going to be a domestic dispute? Laura asked. Because if it is, Ill just go read a magazine until youre done.
Not a dispute, I said. A calm, rational discussion about the fact that we cant go patrolling tonight, even if I wanted to, because my husband invited over guests. I shot a winning smile at Laura. Apparently, were making blintzes.
She turned toward Stuart, her expression suitably amazed. With Kate? Youre making blintzes with Kate?
I am nothing if not optimistic, my husband the comedian said. I firmly believe Kate is a woman of many hidden talents.
And I firmly believe I married a
My rude comment was cut off by the chime of the front doorbell, which caused Timmy to come squealingstill nakedinto the kitchen to announce the arrival of peoples. Chuckling, Stuart stood and pointed to me. Ill go meet the peoples. You try to come up with an insult that doesnt involve an obscenity.
I flashed him a simpering smile and silently seethed. The things I put up with . . .
More coffee? I asked Laura as Stuart headed away.
One more cup. And then I should get home. Theoretically, I have things to do.
Theoretically?
Laundry, vacuuming, dusting, she said, ticking them off on her fingers. But Ill probably end up researching for you.
Good girl, I said, half listening as Stuart greeted someone at the door. I could hear the deep murmur of his voice, followed by higher-pitched tones. A woman, though I couldnt make out what she was saying.
What I did make out was Timmys high-pitched yelp and Stuarts controlled shout for me to get my ass in there.
It took me about two seconds to arrive, but that was two seconds too many. Lisa was inside, her hands tight on Timmys headhands I knew were strong enough to snap his neck with no effort at all.
Im sorry, Stuart said, talking to me though his eyes never left Lisa.
You didnt know what she looked like, I said.
I should have figured it out.
Hush, Lisa said, pushing Timmy ahead of her as she urged us all toward the living room. I wanted to fight back, to attack, but until I could figure a way to keep Timmy safe through all of this, I was in total cooperation mode.
I should kill him right now, Lisa said. Retribution for your destruction of John-John.
Kill him, and theres nothing shielding you. How long do you think youll last in here without my little boy to hide behind?
Im not worried about a pitiful attack from a human, she said. But she made no move to harm Timmy, and I could only hope that she realized just how much she needed him to keep her alive in that body.
Behind her, I saw Allie step quietly along the upstairs hall to pause at the top of the stairs. She turned and signaled for Mindy to stay back and quiet. I couldnt risk looking at her more directly, not so long as I wanted to keep her presence a secret.
I did, however, risk a glance toward Stuart. He also stood facing Lisa, which meant he was facing Allie as well. I sent him silent instructions to be careful. To keep his eyes on Lisa and to only watch Allie in his peripheral vision.
Fortunately, Allies movements were big enough. She thrust her arms out, mimicking Lisa, then used one arm to smash the other away. I pressed my lips together, terrified of the plan she was suggesting, made all the more dangerous because it required both Stuart and I, and I had no way of knowing if he was understanding Allies spastic gestures.
Such a nice little boy, Lisa was saying, her thumbs stroking his hair. And now that my John-John is gone, I do require a replacement. I think hell do very nicely.
Not in a million, I said, even as Allie counted down with her fingers. Three, two, one
She screamed, the sound so high and piercing Im amazed glass didnt shatter. It didnt need to, though, because the scream itself did the job, causing Lisa to jerk around, loosening her grip on Timmy.
At that moment, I slammed into her at the elbow, then immediately grabbed Timmy by the waist, pulling him down out of Lisas hands as she grappled for him, a split second too late.
As I did that, Stuart tackled her, his high school football days coming in handy. She slammed backward on the floor, and I heard Laura cry out. Stuart! Here! and then a kitchen knife was skidding toward him along the wooden floor. He snatched it up and then thrust it down toward her eye.
But Lisa cried out, No! and damned if Stuart didnt hesitate.
That was all it took. She twisted, knocking him off and then bending his wrist back until his hand opened and she could snatch the knife.
I let go of Timmy and was moving in their direction, but Allie got there first. And as Lisa thrust the knife toward Stuart, Allie kicked out, sending the blade skittering back across the floor toward Laura. Then she reached into her back pocket and pulled out a yellow pencil. With a warlike cry, she thrust it forward, slamming it into Lisas eye before leaping back and breathing hard.
Lisas body wavered, and then flopped sideways off of Stuart, who kicked his way out from under the body and sat there staring at it as the familiar shimmer broke the airthe demon escaping back into the ether.
Oh my God. Oh my God! Mindy pounded down the stairs, her eyes wide. Its true, she said, as I moved back to Timmy, to gather him in my arms. Its really true.
Its true, I confirmed. I looked at Allie. You okay?
She rotated her shoulders, then glanced toward Lisa. For a moment, she looked vaguely ill, then it cleared and she nodded. She was going to kill Timmy and Stuart. Yeah. Im fine.
Mindy looked between Allie and me, her own expression shifting between horror and fear and amazement. From the kitchen, Laura called to her, and she bolted in that direction, losing herself in her mothers embrace.
How about you? I asked Stuart.
Not so good, he admitted. Maybe Im not ready to go patrolling.
Maybe its time I worked harder to make you ready, I said.
I couldnt do it. I could hear the tinge of self-loathing in his voice. She would have killed Timmy. Shes a creature from hell. I know all of that, and I still couldnt manage to shove a knife through her eye.
Its hard, I told him. Harder than you think it will be. I exhaled loudly and caught Allies eye. You did good, kid. Made me proud.
A wisp of a smile touched her mouth. Told you I can handle myself. She cocked her head. And if we start saving now, I can handle myself with a car when Im sixteen.
Dream on, I said, but Ill admit I was smiling.
So what do we do about the body? Stuart asked. Weve got company in just a few hours.
Well, Stuart, I said. Fortunately, we have a really big pantry.
In the end, we decided that the trunk of Stuarts car was a better demon hiding place than the pantry, and with help from Laura and Allie, we had Lisa wrapped up in an old sheet and dumped in the car in no time.
Mindy offered to helpwhich I considered a good sign that we hadnt scarred her for lifebut we all declined her offer. There are some things you dont need to be doing the first time you learn that demons are real, and disposing of the body is one of them.
After dealing with the body, Laura and the girls headed over to Lauras house, taking Timmy with them, because my best friend is a saint. Once the house was empty, Stuart and I turned to the next matter on the agenda, something significantly more scary than demons, at least in my book: cooking.
Do you want to tell me again why were doing this?
Two reasons, Stuart said easily. One, I want my new boss and my partner to know each other socially. It makes it easier if I have to divert time from one of my obligations to another. Makes them seem involved. Like they have a stake in my success in both arenas. And, of course, I want them to know my wife.
I already know them both.
And now theyll know you better.
Are you sure you made the right decision quitting the campaign? I asked. Youre a born politician.
Im not entirely sure thats a compliment.
I only smiled, figuring it was best not to comment.
The corner of his mouth twitched knowingly.
And the second reason? I asked.
Normalcy, he said. This is what normal people do. They have friends over. They drink coffee and eat blintzes and sip wine.
I dont think Ive ever had a blintz at someones house.
Trust me. Blintzes are mandatory. Along with bad jokes and gossip about coworkers.
Patrolling for demons after dark?
Usually not.
Regular weapons training?
As a rule, no.
I shrugged, feigning nonchalance. Sounds like a dull existence, but I suppose we can try it for the night.
He slid his arms around my waist and nuzzled my neck. How many of these have we had, with only you knowing what kind of evil might decide to crash the party?
Several, I admitted.
And I never knew. He stated that as fact, without a hint of regret or disapproval. Nonetheless, I stiffened, my own mind voicing his unspoken accusation.
Im sorry, I said. I did what I thought was best.
And tonight?
I drew in a breath, knowing he was worried. So was I, but I had no intention of letting it show. Tonight, I have you to help me.
Does that make it better or worse? he asked. I dont have your skill. Im a liability, not an asset. He paused, and I saw the muscle in his cheek working. Im not Eric.
I drew him close, kissed him hard. Youre not, I agreed. And I love you.
You say the sweetest things, he teased, but I was pleased to see that he looked genuinely relieved.
Does that mean I can have a reprieve from cooking? I can put out plates and cups and napkins. Im a great napkin putter-outter.
Togetherness, he said. Trust me.
As it turns out, the cooking extravaganza wasnt quite the horrific ordeal Id expected. Stuart had gone a little crazy printing recipes from [http://allrecipes.com] allrecipes.com, which I thought was incredibly cute, a fact that embarrassed him enough that he refused the apron I teased and taunted and tried to tie around his waist. After that playful interlude, though, we got down to business, and by the time we went upstairs to change for the evening, wed managed not only blintzes but tiny little quiches, a selection of cheese and fruit, and cheesy biscuits with sausage that just about melted in your mouth.
I fully intended to abdicate kitchen duty altogether. There is no shame in passing the job off to the more prepared partner. Especially if it means wed have meals more interesting than meat loaf and pot roast on a semi-regular basis.
I was dressed and ready and trying to convince myself not to dig into the little quiches when the first guest rang the doorbell.
At least, I assumed it was the first guest. After this mornings debacle, I wasnt taking chances, and I peered through the peephole before opening the door to Bernie. I gave him and Lila quick hugs, then sent them back to Stuart as I waited for Pete and his wife to park their car and walk up the drive to the front door.
Beyond them, on the far side of the street, a woman leaned against a sleek black Ferrari. She had dark hair and wore black pants and a black jacket. I couldnt see her face in the dim light, but I didnt need to. I knew her build and the way she moved.
Nadia Aiken.
I frowned, then forced my expression to clear as I welcomed Pete and his wife, now introduced to me as Angie, into my home. I did the kiss-kiss greet-greet thing, and when I turned to look back, the Ferrari and the woman were gone.
Something wrong? Pete asked. A reasonable question as I was still standing in the threshold, the door open wide.
Sorry. Mind wandering. I plastered on a smile and followed them in, wondering if I could have been mistaken. Why would Nadia come back to San Diablo, after all? A Demon Hunter turned bad, shed messed my life up pretty good a few months back, and managed to get out of town before I could stop her, much less before I could drag her kicking and screaming into Forza for adjudication and punishment.
Surely the woman in the street must have been someone else.
But no matter how hard I tried to convince myself, the image of Nadia remained, dogging me through the evening despite my efforts to push her out of my head.
Heres something I think youll all find interesting, Bernie said, when we were all settled in the living room with coffee and brandy. He reached into the tote bag filled with paint chips, fabric samples, and scale drawings of various rooms, then emerged with a small black book. One of Theophilis Monroes journals, he said. He lived in the house, you know.
I did know, actually. The mansion itself had been built in the twenties by a silent film producer. At one point, Theophilis Monroe, a rather nasty black-magic aficionado with ties to San Diablos founding family, had moved in and done some heavy remodeling, some of the details of which had played a key part in our recent defeat of Gora-don. What surprised me was that Bernie had one of Monroes journals. Id been under the impression that theyd all found their way to the cathedral archives.
Monroe incorporated all sorts of demonic symbolism into the house once he got his hands on it, Bernie was telling Pete, who clearly wasnt aware of the bad apple on the founding fathers family tree. The guy was into black magic. A total nutcase, of course, but its fascinating to read about.
Where did you find it? I asked, flipping through the little book.
Under the floorboards of the eastern bedroom, he said. We were working in there this afternoon. Who knows how long its been there.
I glanced up at Stuart, then back down at some of the drawings and phrases that popped out from the page.
My wifes first husband was a rare books expert, he said, with that political smile. And shes developed a bit of an interest along those lines, too. Mind if we keep it for a while? We can skim through it and see what we can pull out to go in the ultimate sale brochure.
Sure, sure, Bernie said affably.
Youre going to push the black-magic connection when you put the house on the market? Angie asked, her nose wrinkling.
Dont knock it, Pete said, patting her hand. The more they push it, the more inclined I am to invest.
She laughed, but I could tell that Bernie realized Pete was serious. He leaned in closer and spoke directly to Angie. You probably dont believe in that kind of stuff, but trust me. People get a whiff of demons and danger, and prices start soaring. All that spookiness just makes a thing more interesting. He shifted his gaze to take in me and Stuart. Dont you agree?
I met Stuarts eye and that was all it took. We burst out laughing, leaving Pete, Bernie, Angie, and Lila to stare at us and wonder what exactly it was about demons we found so funny.
If only they knew.
I dont think Ive been so uncomfortable since I first decided to run for office, Stuart said. All I kept thinking was that there was a body in the garage. Did it show?
You were the epitome of cool, I said. Wed changed into black slacks and T-shirts and called Allie back from Lauras, since I wasnt going patrolling with Stuart without backup. Id left Timmy with Mindy and Laura with a promise to call me if so much as a stray dog ran into the yard. And, yes, to call Eric if for some reason they couldnt reach me.
Eddie was a no-show on this adventure, which I assumed meant that his and Ritas date had gone well. Now Stuart and I were creeping along the western edge of the Coastal Mists Nursing Home, while Allie was doing the same on the eastern side. Ill have Eric come by and pick the body up tomorrow.
Im not entirely sure thats the best idea, Stuart said.
I shrugged. It wasnt as if I had a lot of options. So you choose. We dump it in the landfill, sneak into the crypts, or pass it off to Eric. Now that Father Ben was dead, I was no longer able to easily hide dead bodies in the crypt under the cathedral. Fortunately Ericor rather, Davidhad been able to step up to the plate. As the chemistry teacher at Coronado High, he had developed a foolproof way to dispose of the bodies. A way, frankly, that I didnt care to think too much about.
I aimed a smile at Stuart. Landfill or Eric. Your decision.
Youre cocky when youre right, he said, but he said it with a smile.
Im also right that you dont need to be out patrolling tonight, either. You need more training before getting in the field. Wed had this argument at home once already, but Stuart had won by pointing out that any newly made demon was undoubtedly going to be drawn into the service of Odayne and the She-Demon. While hed been right about that, Id been less inclined to agree with his assessment that he should help me track down and terminate the new demon.
In the end, though, Id given in. I didnt want to go alone, and I didnt want to call Eric. And, yes, Stuart could use some practical training. And since newly made demons are more easily slain than their counterparts whod had time to settle into a body, I figured this was as good a practice case as any.
I know youre worried about me, Stuart said. Dont be.
Youre that confident? I asked.
He shrugged. Flexible, he said. If we dont meet any demons, we can pick a spot with a view of the moon on the ocean and I can make out with my wife. He nodded toward the rolling lawn that extended beyond Coastal Mists, ending at a sheer drop-off overlooking the Pacific.
I can tell youre going to be a very productive patrolling partner.
Depends on your definition of productive, he said, and planted a kiss on me. If we make out with our eyes open, the demons cant sneak up on us.
I laughed, feeling only slightly uncomfortable. Having never been on an official patrol with Stuart before, I hadnt really known what to expect. But if this was a preview of coming attractions, I had to admit I liked the scenario.
The walkie-talkie on my hip buzzed, interrupting the moment. I snatched it up, still amused by the fact that Allie had presented it to me in the car and insisted I wear it. Well be in constant communication, she said. And it even has a GPS chip. You know. In case we get separated.
Whered you get this? Id asked, but shed only smiled.
Mom, do you copy?
I gave a little shake of my head, amused by the military tone. Roger, I responded, my voice low. Do you see something?
Negative, Allie responded.
Well, then what happened to radio silence? I asked. Its hard to sneak up on a demon who can hear us coming.
You really think hes outside? I figured we were gonna go in and wander the halls. You know, skulking in the shadows and stuff.
Skulking is on the agenda, I admitted. For me, anyway. I want you and Stuart to wait out here. This, naturally, raised a protest from both my protégés. Hey, I demanded, eyeing Stuart and hissing at Allie. Whos in charge here?
Fine. Whatever. And thats not why I buzzed you, anyway.
It can wait, I said. Radio silence, remember? Wed arrived at the rec center window, and since I wanted to have a peek, I passed the walkie-talkie to Stuart, then pressed my face up to the glass and peered around. Not surprisingly, the room was entirely empty, the facility completely quiet.
So I was reading through some of the notes that Bernie brought, I heard Allie say over the tinny speaker, making me grit my teeth and shake my head in exasperation. And its the coolest thing. Did you know the house has a safe room? An honest-to-God safe room.
I stepped back from the window, frowning at both the walkie-talkie and the expression of bafflement on Stuarts face. Ask her what part of radio silence she doesnt understand, I demanded, but he merely waved my words away. Honestly, was I the leader here or wasnt I?
What do you mean safe room? Stuart asked. The place was built almost a century ago. Safe rooms werent a standard feature.
Not for home invasions, she said, the trademark Alison Crowe eye roll coming through just fine orally. A Theophilis Monroe-style safe room. You know. To keep out demons.
That perked me up, and I tried to snatch the walkie from Stuart. He scowled and held it tight. What are you talking about? he said.
I guess he wasnt as keen on the demons as everyone thought. Either that or he wasnt as cocky about keeping control of them as we thought.
I tried again and this time managed to snag the walkie. A demon-safe room? As in consecrated ground.
Relics. Holy water. Everything blessed by the pope. Pretty cool stuff.
Which room.
That room down the hall from the kitchen. The one we figured was servants quarters thats only got a bed in it, Allie announced, and I could practically hear the grin in her voice. Honestly, I had to agree. Theophilis Monroe, the big bad black-magic aficionado, running and hiding under the bed when the demons got out of control.
Youre right, I conceded. That is a cool fact. But right now I need you focused and right here. I want you and Stuart watching each others backs while I do a round inside.
Roger that, she said, but before she clicked off, I heard her sharp, terrified intake of breath.
Go! I yelled to Stuart, and we both hauled ass around the side of the building toward the thick stand of trees where Allie had been hiding.
Dammit! I yelled, when I saw her standing next to Eric, his arm tight around his daughters shoulder. Dammit, Allie, you scared me to death.
What? She glanced down at the walkie. Oh. Sorry. I squealed, huh? I just wasnt expecting to see Daddy.
No, I said dryly, looking at Eric. Neither was I.
I saw the article in the paper, he said. I figured youd be hunting.
And you thought we needed help? I asked, my arms crossed over my chest.
I wanted to tell you not to bother. He came after me earlier. I took care of the problem.
You go, Dad! Allie said.
He grinned and kissed her forehead as my chest tightened. I so desperately wanted Allie to know her dad. To hang out with him and be pampered by him and listen to all of his stories. But right then, at that moment, I wanted her the hell away from him.
And I couldnt say a word.
Whats with the walkie-talkies? he asked.
I got them from Eddie, Allie said.
Apparently hes taking the control and coordination aspects of his new position seriously, I added.
I wondered what he was doing in Eyes Only, Eric said.
I blinked. Where?
Eyes Only. Its a new shop in Old Town. Spy equipment.
Youre kidding? I examined his face, saw only amusement, then shared a grin with Stuart.
Eddie with spy equipment, Stuart said dryly. Were going to have to start watching what we say around the house.
That got a laugh out of everyone, including me, and in that brief moment, life seemed normal, even good. We were a family, albeit odd and extended. A team.
Then Eric cocked his head and took my arm to pull me aside. Hold up there, buddy, Stuart said. This isnt your party.
More mine than yours, Eric shot back. The party, that is. Not the woman. Though it was clear from his eyes that he meant me as well. I need to talk to Kate.
Stuart took a step forward, and I stepped between them. It may surprise you to know that the alpha wolf game isnt helping. And I do need to speak to Eric. I looked at Allie. You and Stuart can get in some more training.
I thought Stuart was going to argue, but I stared him down. He must have seen the plea in my eyes, because he nodded, then moved toward Allie. Looks like weve got no targets, he said. What kind of practice can we squeeze in on the lawn of a nursing home?
Allie grinned wide, and as Eric and I walked away, I heard her laugh. Well, I could tell you to drop and give me twenty, but . . .
What is it? I asked when wed moved out of earshot. What really happened?
He knocked on my door, Kate. Knocked on my door, and when I opened it, the bastard bowed and told me he was there to serve.
Did you question him? Ask him about Odayne, get any details at all that we can work with?
I invited him in, shut the door behind him, and slid a blade through his eye, Eric said, sounding more dangerous than Id ever heard him. More dangerous, even, than Id recently seen him.
Dammit, Eric, you should have held him. Should have called me. Interrogation wasnt my strong suit, but I could manage it when I had to. And, honestly, if I was interrogating some badass demon that was somehow involved in dragging Odayne out of my husband and into the world, then interrogating his ass would be a pleasure.
His face darkened, and I was on the verge of revising that earlier observation on his dangerous appearance, because right then he was close to outdoing even himself. Then he seemed to pull it together. I know, he said. Believe me, I know. But I couldnt. Dammit, Kate, I couldnt stop myself.
I nodded, hoping I looked businesslike and determined rather than worried and shaken. This lack of control was bursting forth more and more frequently, and so far, wed found nothing to slow it down. Worse, we had no hints, no leads. No anything.
Theres more, he said, and I looked up at him, certain the worry was written all over my face. Im remembering my dreams.
For the longest time, he could remember only that hed had them. That they were dark. That they were filled with the demon. Impressions of evil and danger. But no specifics.
Are you okay? I asked, taking his hand and hating the thought that he was privy to whatever vile machinations went on in a demons subconscious.
So far it hasnt been too bad, he said with a wry grin. Though I feel a bit like a teenage boy.
I scowled. What are you talking about.
Sex, he said. Violent and brutal, but also hot. Very hot.
Despite the fact that this was only a dream, I felt a knot of jealousy skip into my stomach.
Thats two demons now, coming to me as if Im part of the team. I could hear the torment in his voice, could see it in his eyes. And now these dreams. Wild, sexual dreams. He reached out as if to touch me, but pulled his hand away. I wish I could say its you in them, but its not. He reached out and brushed my cheek, my heart fluttering merely from the touch of his hand. Katie, I dont know who she is, but shes there, with me. And the demon inside. Dear God, he wants her.
Im not sure if it was jealousy or prudence that made me speak then, but I took that opportunity to tell him that I thought Id seen Nadia.
Nadia?
I laid it all out for him. How Id opened the door and seen her standing in the distance.
Youre sure it was her?
No, I admitted. But I have a feeling it was. Especially after hearing about your dream.
She wasnt in my dream, he said stiffly, and I was petty enough to rejoice a little about that.
If shes here, he said, well find her. And whatever shes up to, well stop it.
He reached down and grabbed my hand, the support entirely Eric, and the wash of relief that flooded through me was overpowering. And why not? I needed him on my side and on his game. Because Nadia was bad news for both of us. The last time she was in town, after all, shed used Eric for demon bait, then strung him up and tried to bleed the life from him. Id taken it a step further, of course, and shoved a knife through Erics heart.
Id brought him back to life, but that didnt change the fact that Nadiaa former Hunter gone badpretty much topped my shit list.
Ten
As it always does, Monday arrived on the heels of Sunday, and after what I could only think of as a wild and unpredictable weekend, we fell back into routine. Better than routine, actually, because now that Mindy and Allie were walking the best-friend path again, I didnt have to drive Allie to school. Laura gained that honor.
We need to start the carpool up again, Laura said, but I shook my head and made a sign of the cross as if warding off evil. For years, wed had a neighborhood carpool going, but little by little the riders were dwindling away, schedules altered by pre-class band practice or post-class musical rehearsals. After several rocky attempts at coordinating, I pulled out, practicing what all those self-help books recommend: the power of saying no. Considering that I had a toddler, a teenager, and a constant flood of demons, I had more than enough juggling on my hands, and driving my own daughterand only my daughterto school seemed like a fair and reasonable decision.
Naturally, Id felt like a selfish, guilty bitch.
At the time, Mindy had been going to school early and coming home late. Not only had it driven Laura crazy, but it had meant that our girls hadnt ridden together. Once Mindy was past rehearsals for the musical, the rift between them had widened and they still werent riding together. Now that the rift had healed, I wasnt sure what I was more happy aboutthat my daughter had her best friend back, or that I no longer had to drive her every single day.
Laura, thank goodness, had that honor today, and although Id asked her to come over and help me research after she dropped the girls off, shed said she couldnt this morning.
Actually, shed gone a bit pink, looked down at the cup of coffee we were sharing while the girls got themselves organized, and said she had some things she needed to do beforehand, but that shed meet me at three-thirty to help with Allies party planning.
Whats going on? Id asked, and shed blushed even pinker.
Nothing. Honest. Its nothing. If it turns into something, Ill tell you, but until then, ImOh, hell, Im going to go take the girls to school. And then shed left, leaving me baffled. I ran through a mental list of possibilities, and decided the odds were that she was getting back together with Dr. Hunk. And although I was desperately, pruriently curious, I also knew shed tell me in her own sweet time.
In the meantime, my focus needed to be on demons. And on toddlers, I thought, smiling down at the little boy playing with his trucks on the kitchen floor. My clean kitchen floor, which was amazing in and of itself. But, yes, the house was still spotless, having been scrubbed clean with Stuarts help yesterday before the party. Well, the downstairs anyway. The childrens rooms and their bathroom were still a wreck, but since we hadnt reached a point that would require the health department to step in, I decided not to worry about it.
Stuart had left early for the office and then a run-through of the mansion, so I was on my own watching Timmy. I tossed some of his trucks in a laundry basket, then picked up both the basket and the boy and headed upstairs.
Our attic is of the Brady Bunch variety, the kind that is accessed through a door and stairs rather than some annoying pull-down ladder. The room is finished as well, with drywall over the insulation, though wed never bothered with paint or anything other than plywood flooring.
For years, Id secretly kept my old hunting trunk up there, with my additional equipment tucked away in the storage shed. Now that my secret was no longer secret, my entire arsenal of weapons and books was up here, with the added bonus that they didnt have to be concealed.
I spent fifteen minutes moving daggers, crossbows, and swords back into locked cabinets so that Timmy would have a nice safe area in which to drive his trucks, and then I opened one of the boxes of Erics old books. Allie had already been up here, and shed taken an entire box down to her room. Her reports so far had been limited to an announcement that she couldnt find a dang thing, and I hoped that Id have better luck.
The leather-bound books were musty and fragile, and as I pulled out the top one, tiny bits of desiccated leather stuck to my fingertips. I sat the book carefully on the floor and began to slowly flip pages, forcing myself to concentrate on the words and not let my mind wander.
Research had never been my strong suit; that had always been Erics thing, and now I had to wonder if he really had enjoyed research, or if hed simply been desperate to find his own answers.
Answers that werent, I realized, in the book I was reviewing.
I carefully pulled out another, and then another, both of which I managed to review before Timmy got restless and begged for me to play truck with him. Since truck requires me to lay flat and still and pretend to be a massive highway system, this wasnt the kind of game I could play while multitasking. And though I tried to convince him that he really didnt want to play that game, he was not to be deterred.
Ten minutes, I said, and he jumped up and down, holding up both hands, fingers splayed, and shouting, Ten, ten, ten! at the top of his lungs.
Five minutes into it, I heard Eddies familiar tread on the stairs into the attic, then grimaced as he peered into the room, his grin wide, as Timmy drove a truck up my arm, over my chest, and then down toward my belly button.
Heh, Eddie said, as I scowled in his general direction.
Take my place, I said. And then lets see if you laugh.
Youre missing the humor, girl, he said. Whats funny is that youre down there and Im not. He whipped off a little salute. And now Im off to work. Tonight we can talk about whatever you find in those books. Assuming you ever get off your back and look again.
Very funny. Now go.
He went, and I heard his chuckle all the way down the stairs.
I gave Timmy an extra five minutes of using Mommy as a highway, then sat up, to his extreme and vocal displeasure. Mommys gotta work, kiddo.
NOOOOOO!! he wailed Play truck. PLAY. TRUCK!
At which point I had to either give in and play, or stick to my guns and work.
I chose the middle ground and carried him downstairs for a bribe of a banana and Teddy Grahams.
I love you, Mommy, he said, trucks forgotten now that his face was all smeary with fruit and chocolate crumbs.
I love you, too, munchkin, I said, hauling him from his chair into my lap. I wrapped my arms tight around him and buried my nose in his thick mop hair. I breathed deep of the clean scent of baby shampoo and tried to rid my mind of the memory of that bitch holding my babys head. Honestly, I couldnt bear it, nor could I stomach the thought that she might be gunning for my family.
Too tight, Mommy!
Sorry, kiddo, I said, and loosened my grip. But I had an idea. A little idea, but it might give me some peace of mind.
What we do, Mommy? What we do? Timmy asked as I stood up.
Were getting dressed, I said. And then were going to go have a chat with our friendly neighborhood James Bond.
Eyes Only sits at the southern end of the Promenade, between a coffee shop and a candy store. Timmy and I hit both of them, coffee to fuel me and candy to fuel the kid. Then we pushed open the mirrored door to the spy shop and found Eddie standing behind the counter, his eyes going wide when he saw us.
He recovered quickly enough and snorted. Look whos here.
So its true. I looked around, took in the various spy accoutrements.
Oughta be a detective, he said. What you doing? Tailing me?
You gave Allie the walkies, I said. And Eric saw you in here one day. Wasnt too hard to figure it out.
He shrugged.
Why didnt you tell me?
He snorted. Mans gotta have his secrets, right?
I blinked, baffled. Out of everything we know about each other, youre keeping secret the fact that you work in a spy shop?
Im old and eccentric, he said. You need more explanation than that?
No, I admitted. I think that about covers it.
So you here because you got curious? Or cause you need something.
Both, I said, then pointed to Timmy. Can you track him?
What? You mean like put something on him? Have him swallow a radioactive isotope. Direct a satellite to this location?
I blinked, not certain if he was serious, or if hed been watching too many movies on his new television.
Ha! he said. Gotcha.
Very funny. Seriously, I want to know my kids safe. You got anything like a LoJack for kiddos?
That I can do, he said. He came out from behind the counter and moved through the store with more efficiency than Id ever seen him move through the house. After a few minutes, hed put quite a little pile on the counter and gestured me over for a closer look.
All of these will work, he said. This one heres designed for kiddos, he said, holding up a small pin shaped like a ladybug. Designed for if you lose your kid in the store, though, so its not got much range. This ones not as cute, but its probably more like what you want. He pulled out a black bracelet. Whaddya think, kiddo? Wanna wear jewelry?
Timmys arm enthusiastically shot out, and as soon as I gave a nod, Eddie fastened it onto Timmys arm. There you go, he said, then passed me the other half of the kit and showed me how to work the various controls in order to trigger a panic alarm and a GPS locater. By the time I shoved everything into a complimentary Eyes Only tote bag, I was feeling both high-tech and confident.
You getting one for Allie, too?
Allies a badass Demon Hunter, Eddie, or hadnt you heard? And badass Demon Hunters dont agree to be tagged.
Whoever said she had to agree? He disappeared under the counter and came back out with a tiny box that he opened to reveal a minuscule metallic dot. And whoever said Hollywood got it wrong?
I looked down at the little dot, met Eddies gleaming eyes, and smiled.
The Palace Theater is four blocks from Eddies spy shop, and I filled the distance with a leisurely stroll, stopping in various stores, including a jewelry store where I found a beautiful silver and glass pendant onto which I could stick the microdot without it being visible. I tucked it away, planning to present it to her on Friday at her birthday party.
As soon as we neared the theater, Timmy yanked his hand out of mine and raced forward, screaming for Allie, who had just barreled out the front door with Thomas Marks, the manager, strolling behind her, his expression both tolerant and amused.
Mom! she cried, swinging Timmy up onto her hip. It is so cool. I didnt have any idea how cool when I picked it, but it is so freaking cool!
Considering weve already put down the deposit, Im glad to hear that. Tom, its good to see you again, I added, extending my hand to his to shake. Thanks for letting us come by. I wanted my friend Laura to see the inside, too, since shes my decorating guru. Shell be here any minute.
Not a problem, he said. We love showing off the theater. And you lucked out, too. Usually, we provide a two-hour window before events for decorating, but in your case, well have a work crew in here on Thursday afternoon, which means you can pick up the key anytime after five and take your time fixing the place up.
This is so totally going to rock, Allie said, stepping back until she was actually in the street between two parallel-parked cars.
Built during the Hollywood heyday, the theater was a showcase for all the bells and whistles, pomp and circumstance that had been included in moving picture venues back then. The exterior boasted an art deco style with accents ranging from Egyptian (hieroglyphs etched into marble columns) to Gothic (the gargoyles that peered down from the rooftop). A stand-alone ticket booth sat flush with the sidewalk, its gold highlights gleaming in the sun. Someone on Thomass team had put a mannequin in the ticket takers seat, a jaunty ushers-style hat in red velvet with gold cording on her head, the design matching the uniform in which shed been dressed.
Above the ticket boothand just under the gargoylesan old fashioned marquee announced the theaters availability for private parties. On Friday, though Allie didnt yet know it, that marquee would be filled with a special birthday message, and I couldnt wait to see her eyes when she saw her name up in lights.
An outdoor waiting area filled the space behind the ticket booth, customers kept out of the elements while they waited for the previous shows patrons to exit by a black marble overhang dotted with tiny lights, so that at night the illumination from the lights simulated a starry sky. Those stars shone down on San Diablo. Or, more particularly, on the map of 1924 San Diablo laid out in marble under the waiting patrons feet.
And, of course, on either side of the patrons were walls of glass display cases, showing past and upcoming movies. Thanks to Laura and her computer-goddess best-friend qualities, by Friday evening those cases would be filled with posters of Allie, each showing her at a different age, from babyhood up to just shy of fifteen years.
My step hesitated as the reality struck memy baby was growing up.
I always knew theyd only grow in one direction. I just never expected fast-forward.
I turned to find Laura standing beside me, with Mindy bounding past to catch up with Allie. Thomas was holding one of the glass doors open, patiently waiting for me to get with the program. I did, matching Lauras step as she headed inside. I could just ground her until shes twenty-one. Keep her inside. Keep her my baby.
You could, Laura agreed mildly. But you dont really want to.
No, I didnt. My little girl was growing up, and doing it well. And damned if that didnt make me proud.
It also made me want to cry, which was a little embarrassing with Thomas looking on.
Right, I said, snapping out of it. I turned to Thomas. Youve got things to do, and we need to get the lay of the land and figure out what to buy for decorations. Do you need to stay with us, or can we wander?
Wander all you want, he said. Let me just show you a few highlights. We started in the lobby, with Thomas pointing out the main entertainment center, from which we could pipe music into the rest of the theater. And, of course, you can use the concession stand however you want. It was empty now, but I saw from the gleam in Lauras eyes that she had big plans for it.
What? she said, catching me eyeing her. Put out a few party favors, some extra snacks. We could even sell them. Optional, of course, she added when she saw my raised eyebrows.
But thats a great idea, Allie put in. Cause I already told everyone that I didnt want presents and that we were gonna put together a basket for charity. Im thinking literacy, you know? So if we sell extra snacks and silly party favors, then all that money can go to the literacy fund, too. She nodded firmly to Laura and then turned to me. What do you think?
I think youre an exceptional kid, I said, feeling a little like the Grinch when his heart swelled in the end.
Exceptional enough to get a car on my next birthday?
No, I said, but nice try.
She harrumphed, but her heart wasnt in it, and she and Mindy flounced off to explore the rest of the theater.
Laura and I followed more leisurely. The inside was exceptional, with gold leaf over plaster carvings showing angels and lions and birds surrounding the stage, which was set up for either movies or live performances. Six boxes protruded over the audience, three on each side, and in the back a balcony looked down on the action. Once filled with seats, the balcony area was now a dance floor, and Stuart and I had arranged for a DJ to be tucked in a corner and play the days popular music, as well as a few oldies to satisfy the grown-ups.
While Laura wandered around taking snapshots, I headed onto the actual stage, looking up at the intricate system of flies and counterweights. Allie and Mindy were in the audience, and though I couldnt see them, I could hear them, currently engaged in an involved discussion of the proper proportion of games to disorganized mingling required for the ultimate party. That quickly shifted to the guests, and Allies excited announcement that Charlie had agreed to come.
I frowned, trying to remember if I knew Charlie, and couldnt help but smile when Allie trilled on and on about how hed actually asked her to tell him her favorite color. I was still smiling when something lashed out and caught me across the neck, slamming me back against the wall. An arm. And it was attached to a woman.
Hello, Kate, she said. Youre looking well.
Hello, Nadia, I said, slipping my hand into my purse and curling my fingers around my knife. Id say its nice to see you, but Id be lying.
She stepped back, her laughter low and silky. She looked much the same as she had the last time Id seen hersexy as hell and absolutely lethal.
Shall I call Allie back here? Give her a little kiss, too? Honestly, its hardly been any time at all, but already shes so grown up. She leaned in close, her mouth close to my ear. But heres the big question for you. Is she more like Mommy or Daddy? Darkness or light?
Any closer, and youre going to feel my knife in your eye, I said, hatred pounding in my chest. You hang with the demons, you damn well better bet Im going to treat you like one.
Her hand went to her mouth, fingers covering pursed lips. Why, Kate, Im shocked. Such strong language. What would your children think?
You want strong language? Ill be happy to demonstrate some for you, I said, taking a step closer, and gratified to see she took a corresponding step back.
Tsk-tsk, she said, her eyes burning into mine. So serious. Calm yourself, dearest. Theres no need for fisticuffs. Not yet, anyway. Im only here to deliver a message.
Is that a fact? I shifted, my knife hand at the ready. Whats the message?
Nadia glanced down at my knife, sighed a little. After all weve been through, and you dont trust me. It saddens me, Kate.
Message, Nadia.
Its for Eric, she said. Not for you. Tell him shes waiting. Tell him shes wanting.
Who? I snapped. Who is she?
Tut, tut, Kate. Arent you the inquisitive little one?
Im warning you, Nadia.
You? Warn me? Im shaking. Im positively petrified. She leaned back and smiled. But theres no need to threaten. All will be revealed in good time. And until then, I think we should avoid playing Twenty Questions, dont you? I remained silent, seething, and she cocked her head, as if just realizing something. Isnt it ironic that when I was here last I was trying to put a demon inside him. Silly of me, since there was already one in there with him. Her brow furrowed even as my hand tightened around my knife. I wonder if they would have duked it out in there. Bam! Bam! she said, jabbing out with her fists. Honestly, it would have been something different in the demon trade. Usually all we see is the same old, same old.
Not true, Nadia, I said. I get to see pathetic, simpering bitches like you, whove taken the skills Forza gave them and turned them on their ass, and for what? Some fake sense of power? Youre an idiot, Nadia. And more, I dont like you.
Oh, now Im hurt, truly, and on so many levels. Honestly, how do I respond? Lets try this, she said, her voice hardening. One, I do not simper. Ever. Two, my power is not fake. Three, my IQ puts me significantly higher than the idiot range, and Im confident Ive made the most of my superior intellect. As for the bitch comment, Ill cop to that. Its part of my charm.
Whatever youre up to, I said, youre not going to manage.
Is that a fact? And I suppose you have time to stop me while youre running around like a headless chicken trying to figure out how to save Eric from something he doesnt want stopped anyway.
Get out, I said, her words pissing me off more than they should.
Does darling daughter know? Maybe I should tell her. She took a sideways step, as if she was going to call out for Allie, and I took a forward step, to keep her from doing just that.
What I hadnt expected, but should have, was the leg that whipped out and caught me across the chest as I approached. She knocked me back, then was on top of me before I could blink. She grabbed me by the collar, pressed a kiss to my forehead, and then shoved me back so hard I was certain a Kate-shaped imprint would show in the backstage wall.
Mom! Allie called as I bounced forward, determined to get in a blow of my own. But she was gone. She was gone, and Id been whipped, but good. Mom! Allie called again, rushing toward me. What happened?
What? I scoped out the room, searching for Nadia, but shed disappeared.
Your forehead, Allie said. Is that blood? She rubbed her finger on my forehead, then looked at it, her brow crinkling in confusion. Lipstick?
I considered making something up, then decided she had the right to know. She had a history with Nadia, after all. The bitch had started out as hero material to my daughter and nosedived to a position of utter contempt. If anyone deserved to know that Nadia was back, I thought, it was Allie.
She tensed when I told her, her entire body going stiff and her hands clenching into fists at her sides.
Whos Nadia? Mindy asked.
The queen bee bitch of all time, Allie said, and when I didnt bother to chastise her about the language, Mindys eyes went wide.
Wow. So its, like, personal, huh?
Yeah, I said. You could say that.
It makes sense, though, Allie said. I mean if anyones going to work for some hotshot She-Demon, it would be Nadia.
You have a point, I agreed, as thoughts of Eric and Nadia and vengeful She-Demons filled my mind.
Honestly, I missed the days when all I had to do was go out and hunt demons.
Nowadays, everything was too damn personal.
Eleven
I spent the rest of Monday alternating between reading through Erics old books and trying to get in touch with the man himself. Unfortunately, I was having absolutely no luck on either front. And although the inability to find anything in the books bothered me, the lack of communication with Eric was making me positively frantic, especially now that I knew the She-Demon was waiting and wanting. For all I knew, she wasnt waiting anymore, and Eric was being quiet because the demon inside had taken over, and now it was off on holiday with She-Ra.
By Tuesday morning, my nerves were positively raw, and although I told myself I needed to keep the faith, I feared that Id lost Eric before wed even had a chance to save him.
Give it a rest, Eddie said, as I dialed Erics number for the five hundred and seventy-fifth million time. He downed one last slug of coffee as Rita honked three times outside our front door. Hes probably out boinking some other woman. Probably Nadia, eh? She sure as hell wanted to boink him last time, and what red-blooded male wouldnt want to take a bounce on her? He glanced toward Stuart as if for help. Stuart, being the smart guy that he is, ignored Eddie, turning instead to me.
If this is it, Stuart said, well deal with it. Well figure it out. And you will be okay.
I nodded, not worried about me, but about Eric. Worried that if this was it, then I was going to have to shove a dagger through the eye of a man that I loved.
And, yes, worried that if that was what I needed to do, that Id be unable to bring myself to do it.
Youre going to worry yourself sick, Stuart said, getting up and brushing a hand over my hair. He kissed my head, then tilted it back so he could look in my eyes. Dont make it worse in your head than it really is.
Good advice. The same kind of good advice Id probably dish out to my kids. And yet I was finding it damn hard to take it.
With a promise that I could reach him anytime, Stuart rushed out, hurrying to meet Bernie and a bevy of craftsmen who were descending on the mansion with a flurry of bids.
Allie had already left for school with Laura, Timmy was parked on the sofa watching Dora the Explorer, and I was lost in the kitchen with my fears and Erics phone numbers on speed dial.
To distract myself, I returned to the attic and brought down a stack of Erics books. I spread them out over the table, making silent deals with myselfreview one hundred pages and make a call to Erics cell, another hundred pages and I could call his home. Finish a stack of five books and Id call from Stuarts private line in the study. The one with the caller ID block, just in case Eric was avoiding my phone numbers.
By Tuesday afternoon, Id dialed Erics home and cell phone numbers so many times and from so many phones my speed-dial finger had a callous, and my voice was raw from leaving pleading messages for him to call me.
Completely frantic, I finally broke down and called Stuart to tell him how worried I was, and the fact that Stuart didnt hesitate before dropping whatever project he was working on at the mansion was a testament to how much the fear had crept into my voice. It was he who suggested we drop Timmy at Lauras and then go by Erics apartment. Well look, he said, reasonably. And maybe then well know whats really going on.
Neither of us spoke on the way; how could we with the thickness of my fear sucking up all the useable air in the car? And as soon as Stuart pulled up in front of the building, I was out the door and running up the stairs.
Hes not answering, I told Stuart when he joined me outside Erics door. Im not entirely sure why that surprised me. I hadnt really figured hed be in. After all, Eric was a thorough man, and if he was avoiding me, I would expect him to do a good job of it.
Do you have a key? Stuart asked. I nodded, then saw a flicker of something that might be pain flash in his eyes.
He gave it to me for Allie, I said, pushed by a need to explain.
It doesnt matter, he said. Just open the door.
I wanted to argue until the chill left his voiceeven red-hot anger was better than the ice I heardbut now wasnt the time. I slipped the key in the lock, tried to turn it, and found that it didnt do a damn thing.
I looked at Stuart and shrugged. Apparently I was mistaken. I dont have a key after all.
Back door?
I shook my head. Sliding glass, no outside lock, and were on the third floor.
Then we break the window, he said. And hope he doesnt have an alarm.
He took off his shirt, wrapped it around his hand, and smashed in the side window. Then he carefully pushed the shards of glass away, unlocked the window, and shoved up the sash. Back in a minute, he said, then disappeared inside while I stood there alternating between feeling extraneous and being impressed with Stuarts breaking-and-entering skills.
He opened the door for me and I stepped inside. The apartment smelled musty, as if it had been closed up for days after someone cooked onions, and my nose wrinkled as I poked around, rifling through Erics papers as I tried to find somethinganythingthat would give me a sense of where he was right then. And of how far out the demon had pushed.
Unfortunately, Eric was not in the habit of keeping a diary about his battle with his demonic internal foe, which meant that I did not find a conveniently detailed story. Nor were there clues scribbled on pieces of paper left casually by the bedside.
In other words, I found not one of the types of clues that were regularly discovered by heroes and heroines on television and in the movies. Feeling cheated, I began to look deeper, digging through his clothing drawers and poking my fingers between his mattress and box spring.
Anything? Stuart asked.
I started to shake my head, but as I did, I noticed a floor vent with a loose screw and very little dust on that part of the floor. Hang on, I said, then bent down to peer at it. Theres something in here.
As Stuart bent down beside me, I loosened the screw with my fingers and pulled off the vent cover. A spiral-bound notebook was inside, like the kind a student might use in math class.
Whats in it? Stuart asked.
I flipped through the pages, my mouth going dry as I did. Page after page was covered with intricate, detailed sketches of a double-bladed dagger, an ornately carved hilt in the middle. Its the dagger, I said, looking up to face my husband. Its Erics sketches of a dagger he swore that hed not only never seen, but that hed never even discovered a clue as to its looks or its whereabouts.
Huh, Stuart said, glancing at the spiral with what could only be described as false casualness. From the looks of that, Im inclined to say he lied.
Yeah, I said, wishing desperately for another explanation, but finding none. I know.
It doesnt necessarily mean he has the dagger, Laura said. Stuart and I had spent another hour trying to find either Eric or more clues. Wed failed, and Id put on a facade of false cheer so that he wouldnt feel compelled to hang around and hold my hand. Instead, I waited until he was back out the door, let the facade drop, and headed over to Lauras to retrieve my little boy and wallow in coffee and sympathy. So far, the wallowing was working well, and the grape Popsicle Timmy was sucking on was keeping him quiet and happy.
Maybe hes seen it in dreams, Laura continued. You said he has them sometimes, right? And he cant remember them?
Lately hes been remembering, I said, thinking about the sexual dreams hed described to me.
But not all. Maybe he doesnt even know about the vent. Maybe you snatched the demons notebook and Eric doesnt know about it at all.
Maybe, I agreed. Or maybe he knows damn well whats going on and hes holed up in a cheap motel somewhere screwing Nadias brains out as they walk through every one of those dreams hes been having lately. I balled up my napkin and tossed it across the room. It landed softly, without the kind of crash and blast that would have eased off some of my frustration.
Want a brick? Laura asked.
If I thought youd let me, I admitted, Id say yes.
Sorry. Im probably going to redecorate, but Im not for certain. Maybe later we can go to the mansion and demolish a countertop or something.
At that I did laugh, and that simple act alone had me feeling better. Do you think he is with her? I asked. With Nadia?
I dont know what to think, Laura admitted. It is weird, though. Why didnt Nadia kill you? I mean, she had you, right? You said she jumped out of nowhere and surprised you. So whyd she even talk? Why not just whack you?
Thanks, I said. Just the kind of thing I want to think about.
Its a legitimate question, she said with an apologetic shrug. I may not be able to whack the demons, but I do what I can. And that includes asking the hard questions.
So it was either for old times sake, I said, or for some specific purpose.
Keep you alive for something, she said. But what?
Youre the research gal.
Probably a ceremony. Every time we turn around, theres a ceremony. Ill see what I can figure out.
I glanced at the clock and frowned, amazed at how much of the day had already flown by. I promised Stuart Id go by the mansion and put in a few hours, and Allies meeting us there after her session with Cutter. Want to come, too?
Pink tinged Lauras cheeks. No thanks. Im, uh, busy. But Mindys going. Theyve totally crossed back over the bridge to normal.
I know. Thank goodness. Im not sure about the rules. Would we have been allowed to stay friends if our girls were feuding?
Absolutely, Laura said with a wicked grin. Wed each be spies for the other side.
I laughed, then pushed back from the table. I better get going.
Hang on, she said, then jumped to her feet. Before I could ask what was up, she trotted out of the room, then trotted back a few minutes later with a mailing tube. This is only the first one, but I wanted you to see it.
Me see! Me see! Timmy reached out as Laura opened the tube and slid what looked like a poster out.
Not with purple Popsicle hands you dont, I said as Laura yanked it up and out of reach.
His little face turned red with displeasure. Me. See. Too!!!
Go wash your hands and then you can see, I said, to which he responded by licking the purple off his fingers.
All done! he said, holding out his hands, fingers splayed wide.
I dont think so, buddy, I said, then scooped him up around the tummy and hauled him over to the sink. He laughed and clapped and shoved his fingers under the stream, managing to splatter the front of my shirt with water. I plunked him on the floor, handed him a towel, and we both headed back to the table.
Laura had unrolled the poster and was using a salt-and-pepper shaker along with a creamer bowl and a trivet to hold down the four corners. I took one look at the poster and gasped. Laura, I said. Oh my God. Youre wonderful.
You think so? she said, cocking her head to examine her handiwork. A full-size poster with a pink background and a collage of images. My little girl, from her first day in the hospital to a recent shot of her in Cutters studio, her leg up in the air in the perpetual capture of a crescent kick, and two dozen photos showing stages in between.
I dragged my fingers over Allies face, and looked up at Laura feeling sappily sentimental. Fifteen years, I whispered, even as I sat down and pulled Timmy into my lap, only half-listening as he started humming. I never thought my kids could outdo the fascination and love Id felt that first time Id held each of them, but every day, it grows. Hard to believe what children can do to you, I said to Laura. And its almost scary how much your heart is at risk.
Definitely scary, Laura said. But worth it.
I hugged Timmy so close and so tight that he stopped his rendition of the Wonder Pets theme song. Soft arms went around my neck and he hugged me close. And, because Im a sentimental sap, I started to cry.
I did it! Mindy screeched as the dagger flew from her hand to lodge in the drywall of the mansions entrance hall. Did you see? Did you see? I totally did it!
Thats great, I said, while Allie gave her a hug. Keep practicing and youll be able to do it every time. That, I thought, was saying a lot, especially when you considered theyd been at this for an hour, and Mindy had managed to lodge only one knife in the drywall. More often, the hilt had banged uselessly against the wall, and then the blade had fallen harmlessly to the ground.
Just remember, Allie added, trotting over to pull the blade out of the dented and sliced wall, its all in the wrist. She aimed and let the dagger fly, landing it neatly in the middle of the circle theyd drawn on the drywall with one of Stuarts work pencils.
Wow, Mindy said. This really is pretty cool.
I turned away, smiling at the pleased expression on Allies face, then moved to the far side of the foyer to check on Timmy in the library. The room that had been empty only an hour earlier was now filled with an assortment of toy cars and building blocks, and there was my little boy, passed out on the floor amid what appeared to be an abstract artists rendering of the Los Angeles highway system. He had Boo Bear, his bedraggled blue bear, clutched tight in his arms, and I could hear his soft little snores. I smiled, then stepped back quietly in time to see Stuart coming down the stairs, a clipboard in his hand, and a frown on his face.
Problem?
He shook his head absently. Water leak in the master bathroom. Were going to have to replace the pipes, the drywall, and probably retile the floor.
Oh. Since I had no idea if that was in or out of the budget, I wasnt sure what else to say. Um.
He laughed. Its okay. Im just doing an inventory of the work. So far, theres a lot of it.
Ah, I said, glancing toward the seriously battered wall that had become the focus of target practice.
Dont worry, he said. I already told them its okay.
Good, I said, as Allie rolled her eyes.
Like wed just run around throwing knives at things without asking first.
I apologize for impugning your good sense, I said, causing another more dramatic eye roll from my daughter.
At any rate, Stuart said, doing a valiant job of ignoring us, I wanted to run through some paint swatches with you.
Yeah? I said, mildly pleased. With me?
Ill get a second opinion on whatever we pick out.
Thanks a lot, I said, but not really insulted. Considering I had no confidence in my overall decorating taste, a second opinion was a damn good idea.
He held the paint chips like a hand of cards, then held them up toward the wall. Something off-white for this room, I think, he said, and I nodded. The entrance hall was magnificent, with a gray marble floor, a polished mahogany staircase, and floor-to-ceiling windows. A crystal chandelier above broke the light into thousands of dancing dots of color.
Off-white works, I said. Anything more would take away from the room and the light.
He kissed me on the nose. Perfect.
So when are we going to paint?
Were not, actually. I took the liberty of hiring someone.
I gaped. But Stuart. The budget.
Hes working for a flat two hundred a day. Painting. Tiling. Whatever we need. All we need to do is provide the materials.
I gaped at him. Youre kidding, right? Thats practically theft. And you checked the guy out? Maybe hes a demon looking for a sneaky way to infiltrate himself into our lives. Okay, that was stretching. Demons werent that sneaky as a rule. And while the idea of a demon laying tile might amuse me, the idea didnt reek of reality.
Not everything has to do with demons, Stuart assured me. This is about giving a young guy a solid start. He works on a house like this, its going to help make his reputation. And I told him he could put a sign in our yard. Tile and Woodwork by Joe kind of thing.
His names Joe?
Joe Martin, he said. Hes Petes nephew. Nineteen years old, spent the last year working odd construction, wants to angle his way into high-end remodels, general contracting. I told him that if the price was right, Id help him out.
And the price was definitely right, I said.
Dont knock it. Hes getting fair compensation. At his age, advertising and word-of-mouth are everything.
Behind us, the entrance doors flew open. I whipped around, my free hand reaching for the knife hidden in my jacket sleeve, then stopped when I saw Lila Dorsey, looking much like Dorothy from The Wizard of Oz with a picnic basket over her arm.
Look at you all! Working so hard. I brought snacks, she said, setting the basket down on the tiled foyer floor. Wheres Bernie?
L.A., Stuart said. He found a discount flooring supplier, and hes gone to check out the quality.
She sniffed and shook her head. Honestly, the man carries a cell phone. Youd think he could use it to call me every once in a while. Never mind. Hell just miss out.
She whipped a thin blanket out of the basket and spread it on the floor, then started pulling what appeared to be an endless supply of fruits and cheeses and sparkling waters out of the basket. Well, come on. Its time for a little break.
Allie and Mindy needed no further prodding, and I have to admit that the thought of something cold and sparkly to drink was more than appealing.
Do you knit? Lila asked, glancing toward the basket of yarn and knitting needles that Id completely forgotten about.
That would be Allie, I said, my sweet smile toward my daughter earning me one very firm scowl.
How nice, Lila said. And Id be happy to teach you, too, Kate.
Mom would love that, Allie put in, before I had a chance to decline Lilas invitation. Shes always telling me how much she wants to learn.
My mom, too, Mindy said, as she and Allie caught each others eyes and then burst out into peals of laughter.
Lila looked at me, confused, and I managed a bright smile. Teenagers, I said, as if that explained everything. From the knowing look on Lilas face, I began to think that maybe it did.
As Stuart settled in beside me, I noticed a shadow pass in front of the door that Lila had left open. I tensed, then exhaled with relief as Eric stepped into view.
Beside me, Stuart remained tense, and I had to silently admit that Id relaxed too soon. Eric had been missing for more than a day. For all I knew, he wasnt even Eric anymore.
Wary, I climbed to my feet, shooting glances to Stuart that I hoped made clear that he needed to stay down and silent.
Whats up? I asked, aware of Lilas silent curiosity. I slid my hand over the back of my jeans, reassured by the presence of the switchblade Id tucked into my back pocket even as I felt guilty for wanting protection from this man.
Eric met my eyes, and for a moment I was certain he could read my mind. Then the moment passed, and I saw a glint of humor. I exhaled slowly in relief, cautiously optimistic. Perhaps we hadnt lost him yet.
He looked from me to Stuart. I thought one of you might know someone who could repair a broken window, he said. Seems I had a break-in.
Thats unfortunate, Stuart said smoothly. But dont worry about it. Were happy to help you get it fixed.
Good, Eric said, his eyes no longer on me but on my husband. I figured you could help.
So if thats it I moved forward and took Erics arm, turning him and aiming him toward the front door.
We stopped cold.
Because right there in the doorway was my old buddy Thor, the World Wrestling Federation demon reject who had attacked Eric and me that very first night.
I am here, Thor said, with a deep bow to Eric, to serve you.
Erics arm tightened protectively on mine, even as he twisted around to face Stuart. Go, he said.
I dont think so, Stuart answered, his eyes darting between Thor and Eric.
Eric? I asked, my eyes darting from Stuart to the girls, who were standing stock-still on the far side of the room, Allie positioned in front of Mindy, the knife theyd been throwing tight in her hand. Behind them, I could see Timmy, asleep on the library floor.
Not good. This was so very not good.
Its okay, Eric said. Its okay, I swear. Trust me.
I drew in a breath, saw the confusion on Lilas face, and made a decision, hoping to hell it wasnt the wrong one. Didnt you have something you needed to show Lila upstairs? I asked Stuart, forcing a smile. Why dont you go on? I can deal with this contractor by myself.
Kate.
Contractor? Lila asked.
Highly recommended, I said, forcing a smile. Go on. Bernie would be so upset if you didnt show that thing to Lila.
He wanted to argue, I could see it on his face. But I shook my head and broadened the smile so much my face hurt. Ive got it under control.
He nodded, and helped Lila to her feet. Shes right. I totally forgot, but Bernie wants your opinion on one of the upstairs rooms, and if we hurry, we can probably still catch him before he leaves the supplier.
ButBut Lila sputtered, but she was no match for Stuart who had her up the stairs and out of there. And, bless him, he grabbed a pair of knitting needles on the way. Though how he intended to explain that to Lila, I didnt know.
I had my knife in my hand now, and though I kept my eyes on Thor, I spoke to Allie. Safe room. She wasted no time, just grabbed Mindys hand and took off.
Master, Thor said, with a low bow to Eric.
Out, Eric said. You can serve me by leaving me the hell alone.
I serve you, Thor said once again. And I serve your beloved as well.
Eric cast a sideways look in my direction. She wants you out of here, too.
The demons bland, subservient expression shifted into a sneer. Your true beloved, sire. This one is merely a distraction. This one, he said, lunging toward me, must die.
His motion was so fast, so unexpected, that I barely managed to get clear. As it was, his fingers grazed my shirt as I darted out of his way even as Eric moved in front of me to block the beast.
Get out of here, Eric said to me. Ive got him.
No way. Even if Eric had been one hundred percent, there was no way I was leaving Timmy. That simply wasnt an option, and so instead of leaving, I shifted on my heel and switched direction, running back toward them, Erics curses echoing through the foyer. The demon lashed out, knocking Eric out of the way, though he apologized loudly as he did so. Then he dove at me and managed to catch me around the ankles. I went down with a splat, my knife sliding out across the slick marble floor.
I cursed and clawed at the floor, trying to get purchase, but the demon was hauling me back toward him. I relaxed, planning to attack anew once hed pulled me closer, but before that happened, he let go of me. I flipped over, and realized that Eric had tackled the beast. They were on the floor now, each one struggling for the upper hand.
Blade! Eric shouted. Kate, kick me your blade!
The knife Id dropped was right at my feet, and I hesitated only a second. And then, praying that I wasnt reading Eric wrongpraying that this wasnt a demonic ruse to gain my trustI thrust my leg out and sent the knife skittering across the floor to Eric.
His fingers closed tight around it, and even as Thor screamed out Odaynes name, Eric slid the blade home.
Dont call me that, he said with a sneer. The names Eric. And if you cant remember that, you lousy son of a bitch, you can call me David.
Then he pushed the body off of him, laid back on the tile, and sighed.
I took the time for one quick glance toward the library, saw that Timmy had managed to sleep through the whole thing, then slid across the floor to rest my head in the crook of Erics arm.
Thanks, I said.
You would have handled it.
Yeah, I agreed. But Im glad you were here to do it. I rolled over and propped myself up on my elbow. Ive been worried that Id lost you.
A sad smile touched his lips, but he shook his head. Maybe for a little bit you did, he admitted. I dont really remember.
I hesitated, but knew I had to ask. Was it Nadia?
His brow furrowed. Shes really here then?
Gave me a message for you. I met his eyes. Shes waiting. And shes wanting. I sat up, then took his hand. Do you know who? Who this She-Demon is?
He shook his head, and when his lips curved around the word no, I was both disappointed and relieved. Relieved that he hadnt fallen that much further into the abyss, but disappointed he had no new help to give us.
Beside me, he shifted, and I sat straighter, suddenly wary. What?
He didnt meet my eyes. I dont know who she is, he repeated. But I think Ive been with her. Kate, I think thats where I was.
Oh. I swallowed, hoping he could see how much his words shook me. Well. Thats
Troubling, he suggested.
I almost lied, but knew that I couldnt. Not to him. Yes, I said. But you found your way back. I squeezed his hand hard, pushing down my own fear. You found your way back, and youre going to hang on.
Im back, he admitted, but I didnt like his tone or the way his silver-gray eyes skimmed over me.
Eric? What is it?
He didnt have a chance to answer me, though, because Stuarts overly loud voice echoed down from the upstairs. Id really like to show you a few more rooms.
Later, Lila said. Bernies not even answering his phone. Well have our snack, and the upstairs will keep.
Get him, I hissed to Eric, nodding toward the body. We dragged it toward the kitchen as Stuarts and Lilas footsteps echoed down the stairs.
I think I left some cutlery in the kitchen the last time I was in here, Lila said, and I sighed with exasperation and looked helplessly at Eric.
He, thank goodness, kept his cool. He opened the cabinet doors under the sink and shoved Thors head inside. Then he crouched down and started muttering about pipes and fittings.
Lila stepped in, opened up a drawer at the opposite end of the counter, and looked curiously toward Eric.
Plumber, I said brightly. Weve got a leak.
We have a lot of them, Stuart said, stepping into the kitchen and immediately into his role. After he finishes under there, maybe we can have him take a look at the upstairs.
Great, I said, with a huge smile toward Lila. I think the girls got distracted. You head on back to the picnic and well be right there.
Her smile matched mine, and with a handful of silverware now in her hand, she practically bounced back to the foyer. I sent Stuart a desperate glance, and he followed her out.
Bring him, I said to Eric, who followed me toward the safe room, dragging Thor behind him. He dumped him at the threshold, only jumping slightly when Allie squealed Daddy! and shot off the bed to hug her father.
I stood there with a body at my feet, no useful help, and a slightly nosy woman in the foyer. Mindy, I said. Come give me a hand.
As Allie clung to her dad, Mindy and I dragged the body into the room and then shoved it under the bed. Sorry, I said to her. But thanks.
Are you kidding? That was the coolest. I got to hide a demon. I mean, like wow.
Wow indeed, I said with a smile. Come on girls, back to Lila before she gets curious.
Allie nodded, then broke away from Eric, still standing just outside the entrance to the safe room. I frowned, suddenly uncomfortable, and I kept my eyes on him as I stepped out of the safe room as the girls rushed ahead for snacks.
Thanks, I said, watching his face.
Not a problem.
Thor definitely had it in for me. A shadow seemed to cross his face, his silver eyes darkening. What? I asked. Eric, what is it?
Nothing, he said, his voice remote. But he didnt understand.
I swallowed, feeling suddenly cold. Understand what?
He smiled, then reached out to stroke my hair. That youre not to be harmed. That we dont want to harm one single hair on this perfect head.
And then he leaned forward and kissed my forehead. And so help me, for the first time in my life, I shuddered under Erics touch.
I didnt sleep. Instead, I lay in bed, my forehead seeming to burn under Erics kiss, and my heart twisting in fear. Hed told me that we didnt mean me any harm, but who was we? Eric and Odayne? Odayne and his beloved?
And why were they allowing me to remain safe? Out of Erics love for me? Or was there some other, more nefarious reason?
My fists clenched in the sheets, my mind whirling. What was I supposed to do now that the demon was truly mixed up with Eric? Maybe not completely, but there was no denying that Erics soul was poisoned, and I was no longer sure there was a way back.
I tossed in bed, and at some point sleep must have come, though it was filled with dreams of fire and knives and Nadia bending close over Erics naked body. And Eric turning his head to look at me, telling me they wouldnt harm me and that I had to watch, watch, watch as he descended to rule in Hell.
I woke up with a scream caught in my throat, then almost released it when I saw the faces looming over me.
Dammit! What are you two doing?
Nasty dreams? Eddie said.
Are you okay? Allie asked at the same time.
Beside me, Stuart stirred, and I could tell the moment he realized we had company. He stiffened, then sat up. Kate, he began. Why is half the household standing over our bed?
I havent got a clue, I said grumpily, but I plumped up the pillow behind my back and sat up to hear the answer to that very question.
Its Lilith, Allie said. Liliths the She-Demon.
I swallowed a gasp and looked at Eddie, who nodded seriously. Lilith is one of the worlds oldest and most powerful demons. A creature who existed even before the world was formed. A vengeful female who legend said mated first with Adam, then cursed all men when he bound himself to Eve. Are you sure?
Allie nodded. Ive been doing all sorts of research, and I finally found a reference to Odayne and a lover.
My gaze shifted back to Eddie, and he shrugged.
Forza doesnt know anything about this, I said.
Yeah. I know. I found it in some online role-playing games.
Allie!
No, its good information, she protested. I contacted the guy who plays under Odaynes name. And hes like some theology buff. Got a Ph.D. and everything. And he did all this research and found these love poems. Only they werent really poems. They were more like prayers. But not to God. They were to Lilith, and he said he found them in the archives of some disbanded satanic cult. At least thats what he thought, but it turned out not to be satanic at all. It was goddess worship. Only not a benevolent god. It was a cult that worshipped Lilith.
I was staring open-mouthed at my daughter. You found all this out by going to online gaming sites?
She shrugged. Forzas not the only group out there that knows stuff about demons.
Shes a smart kid, Eddie said, giving her a gruff hug.
That she is, Stuart muttered.
So what did these poems or prayers say?
Thats just it, Allie said. They were prayers for the safe return of her beloved.
I thought Liliths whole thing was that she had no use for men, I said.
Allie shrugged. Guess she found one she could stand, cause the poems were more like love songs, you know? About how Lilith and her mate were one, and each was the heart and soul of the other. Sappy stuff, but creepy, too. And a little bit sad, even, because he was gone, you know? Trapped. Im not really sure how, but bound I guess. Like the time Andramelech was bound in Solomons Stone, she added, referring to a vile demon who had been trapped inside a stone that God had once given to Solomon. The stone had eventually been cut down and placed in a ring, and now that ring was safe inside the Vatican. But the poems mention her mates name. And its Odayne. And I guess Lilith is, you know, like really in love with him.
Lilith and Odayne, I said, as ice-cold fear shimmered through my veins. This was worsemuch worsethan Eric merely having a demon trapped inside. Now he had a demon inside that one of the most vile and powerful demons in history wanted released.
You did great work, sweetie, I said, smiling despite my fear. Amazing work.
Thanks, she said, preening.
Now I need you to go check on your brother.
Her smile faded. Why?
Because I think I hear him.
I dont.
Then I think you need to go get dressed for school, I said.
Its still early.
Allie. I injected a warning into my voice.
God! If you want to get rid of me just say so!
I want to get rid of you, I said, then saw the temper flare in her eyes.
Thats so unfair! she wailed. I figure this stuff out and I dont even get to hang for the planning session. Im not a kid! Im fifteen!
Not until Friday, youre not.
I waited for her to make some sarcastic comment, but none came. Instead, she stormed away, muttering.
As soon as she was out the door, Eddie turned serious eyes on me. We need to find that dagger, he said. And we need to find it soon.
Forget the dagger, Stuart said. If we cant find it, we take that demon out the old-fashioned way. A knife through the eye.
Hell just come back, Eddie said. Born into someone else.
Forgive me if Im more worried about my family than someone elses future problem.
Eddie nodded. We look for the dagger, he said. And if we dont find it, we do it your way.
Either way, Erics dead and trapped, I said. His soul will be tied to this demon for eternity. Theres got to be a way to unbind them, I said. We just havent found it yet.
And were running out of time. Kate Stuart began, but Eddie held up a hand to cut him off.
With these two, theres no halfway, he said. Liliths evil. And Odaynes the mate of the first evil. And now that powers waking up inside your boy. You willing to risk that? You willing to risk your kids?
I closed my eyes and shook my head. Of course I wasnt. No matter whateven if it meant sacrificing Ericmy kids had to come first.
You find that dagger, and you use it, Stuart said. And if you dont, you can be damn sure that I will.
Twelve
After the announcement of Liliths descent into San Diablo, Id assumed the day couldnt get any worse. I was, of course, wrong. And as I stood in bare feet amidst a sea of dishwasher bubbles, I listened as Laura rattled off fact after fact after fact about my new nemesis. Im not sure if a broken dishwasher is really on the same par as a vile uber-demon, but in my current mood, both seemed equally horrible.
Shes a badass, all right, Laura said, frowning at her laptop.
Thats a given if shes come to San Diablo, I said dryly. All we ever seem to get are badasses. I dropped another towel on the floor and moved it around with my toe, trying to sop up some soapsuds. I dont know what Timmy shoved into the dishwasher, but after an expensive service call, Im sure the plumber would be more than happy to tell me when he finally fit me into his busy schedule.
In the meantime, I was more energized than ever about finding a way to unbind Eric from Odayne, and while Laura researched Lilith on the computer, I finished going through all of Erics books in the attic.
By the time I closed the last book, my head was pounding, my eyes were swimming, and I was mightily discouraged.
Nothing?
Not in these, I confirmed. Nothing that seems to even touch on Odayne or unbinding a demon from a soul. And as if those questions arent enough, I cant stop thinking about what Eric said. About how they didnt want to hurt me. It doesnt make sense.
Eric loves you, she said. Hed fight to keep you safe.
Maybe, I said. But I wasnt sure I believed it.
I caught Laura glancing up at the clock. You need to go?
Sorry, she said.
I brushed off the apology. As much as I like the idea of having my own personal research minion, I know that you have a life beyond demons. That is, of course, why Im training Allie.
Damn, Laura said. Im about to be outsourced.
She tucked her computer under her arm and promised to spend some time researching later. Every little bit helped. If anything, Allie and her online gaming research had proved that point.
I left not long after she did, hauling a screaming, cranky little boy around to various errands that Id been ignoring. Home Depot for Stuart and the grocery store for the family being tops of my list. Capn Crunch! Timmy wailed in the cereal aisle. Please, Mommy! Please, please, please!
And, because I am a sucker with a fondness for those crispy little orange-colored bites, I caved, earning myself a tight hug and a firm, I love you, Mommy.
Sugary cereals. The way to every childs heart.
When we finally got back home, I settled Timmy in his room for a nap, and began unloading the car. Three hours of shopping and two dozen bags and I still didnt have any new clothes. Somehow, it just didnt seem fair.
I was shoving two Snickers bars into the freezer when Allie and Mindy came barreling inside, backpacks flying as they tossed them onto the kitchen table. Then they both fell into chairs and demanded ice cream.
Hello? Do I look like your personal serving wench?
A little, Allie said.
Around the eyes, Mindy added.
Here. Allie reached into her backpack and pulled out a report covered in clear plastic.
I took it, then smiled when I saw the cover. Lilith. Bitch Demon from Hell. By Allie Crowe and Mindy Dupont.
We had free periods today, Mindy said. And access to the computer lab.
This is great, I said seriously, flipping through the pages. Theyd included various images of Lilith theyd located online (though how they accessed sites relating to demonology from the school I didnt know, and figured I shouldnt ask). More important was the history section, which included a few accounts of possession by Lilith herself.
Its not common, Allie said when I mentioned the reference to her. But its happened before. And the really interesting thing, she said, moving to stand by me so she could point to the relevant sections of the report, is this right here.
I started to skim the language myself, but Mindy chimed in. Every time shes possessed someone, there have been hints that Odaynes burst out in some poor sap. Thats what he does, she explained. He grows inside humans and then when hes like a grown-up demon he takes over and the person is just buried inside.
Its nasty stuff, Allie said, while I made fascinated noises and hoped that they couldnt tell that not only did I already have this information, but that it worried me greatly.
Youve done terrific work, girls, I said, closing the report and trying to change the subject. But school is for schoolwork. I dont want your grades to suffer. Especially yours, I said, aiming a stern glance toward Mindy. Your moms counting on scholarships.
They both rolled their eyes at that, and then Mindy shook her head in a gesture I recognized as Lauras when shed reached the point of exasperation.
She tugged her backpack toward her and started pulling out folders. All done, she said. And we even did extra credit work. Were totally on the ball, Aunt Kate. I swear.
Honest, Allie confirmed when I glanced her way. Me, too. All caught up.
Well, I said, then stayed silent since I didnt know where to go from there. Homework done before reaching home was a new precedent in my household. And if this was the boon from getting Mindy involved then I couldnt help but wish that Allie had shared our deep, dark secrets months ago.
So since were all caught up, can I sleep over at Mindys?
Moms got a date coming over, but its just Cutter, and well totally stay out of their way.
Cutter? I repeated.
The girls exchanged glances. You didnt know?
I hid a frown, wondering why Laura hadnt mentioned it and trying not to feel slighted or jealous. Daily, I seemed to be learning how little the people most important in my life shared with me. No, no, I said. My mind was just somewhere else. And if youre sure a sleepovers okay with Laura then its okay with me.
Awesome, Allie said. And can we go patrolling tonight?
Not tonight. Ive been checking the paper. No new leads.
You dont have to come. Just Mindy and me. I want to take her. And a slow nights a good one to start on, right?
I aimed a severe look in her direction. Are you insane? Of course youre not going patrolling on your own.
But
No. Now go get your stuff for tonight before I change my mind. Honestly, Allie! Patrolling? What on earth are you thinking?
She didnt tell me what she was thinking. Instead, they both skulked away, leaving me alone in the kitchen with thoughts of Lilith and Odayne and Cutter and Laura. In other words, a mishmash of thoughts sufficient to spur a headache in the strongest of women.
Which was why I didnt feel in the least bit weak when I went to the freezer and snagged one of my candy bars. Not only did I need it, I deserved it.
I was finishing up my second Snickers when the girls clambered back down the stairs. I got a quick kiss from Allie, and then they were gone. I watched the door slam shut behind them, and fought a sense of loss. For a moment, I considered calling Laura, then I remembered her date.
With Cutter.
Honestly.
I started pacing, needing to get my mind off my friend and back onto the more serious problem of my first husband. And since I had no brilliant new ideas on that front, I decided to head upstairs and see if my trusty alimentatore had figured anything out. I was halfway up the stairs when I remembered that Rita had come by earlier, and theyd headed out to the movies. For a Wednesday night, romance certainly seemed to be in the air. And, yeah, I was feeling a little sorry for myself when the garage door opened and Stuart walked in.
The dishwashers dead, Eddies at the movies, the girls are sleeping at Lauras, and shes got a date with Cutter, I announced. How was your day?
Good, he said. Ive got a deal closing on Friday.
I examined his face. Youre liking it?
I am. But dont think I like it so much that youre going to convince me to stop training.
Ill keep that in mind, I said.
So should I go change? he asked. We can go out tonight.
I shook my head, suddenly realizing I had a much better idea. Not a good night for patrolling, I said, moving closer to him and closing my hand around his tie. So Ill just give you a tip today, okay?
Fair enough, he said, keeping his eyes on mine.
Dagger. Eyes. And only the eyes. Dont forget.
I wont forget, he said. Or, rather, he tried to say it. I caught him in a kiss that effectively cut off his words. I could tell I surprised him, but my husbands a big-shot attorney, and he recovers from surprise quickly. He deepened the kiss, making my entire body weak and tingly. Upstairs? he asked.
Here, I said, then grinned when I saw his brows lift.
Really? he asked.
Damn right, I said, kissing him again, backing him toward a wall and fumbling with his clothes.
He got with the program quickly enough, and while Id like to say that Stuart knows how to follow directions, here quickly became there, and we ended up sweaty, satisfied, and naked in the living room, rolled up in each others arms on the floor, half-covered by the afghan I keep on the sofa.
Well, that was a nice welcome home, Stuart said. Wheres Timmy?
Either asleep in his room, I said, or getting an eyeful at the top of the stairs. We both glanced that direction, relieved to find there was no small child peering down at us.
I love you, I said, then kissed him, this time warm and sweet rather than hot and desperate.
I know, he said. I love you, too. He pulled me close, and we stayed like that, the wood floor beneath us growing more and more uncomfortable, but neither of us wanting to get up and break the spell.
The phone, however, managed that.
I sighed and climbed to my feet, frowning when I saw that it was Laura. I thought you had a date, I said.
Oh. I heard the guilt in her voice. Right. About that. I was going to tell you, but
Its okay. Really. But is it true? Youre dating Cutter? I tried to decide how I felt about that. I had nothing going on with the mannothingbut Id always had the impression he was a little attracted to me. So was I going to be jealous now that he was hot for my best friend?
I told myself I wasnt, and hoped that I meant it.
No! Laura said, but then qualified it with a soft, Well, maybe.
Youre not sure?
Im working for him, she said. His office manager quit, and since I used to do administrative stuff for Paul, I offered to fill in until he found someone. And now hes hired me officially.
And tonight? Was that admin stuff?
I could practically hear the blush over the phone.
Dont answer, I said, managing to keep the chuckle out of my voice. And Ill only say this. I know Cutter. I like Cutter. And we already know hes not a demon. I figure those are some serious points in his favor.
Yeah, she said. And he kisses great, too.
Laura! And that time I really did laugh.
She did, too. Listen, I didnt call to talk about the man in my living room
Hes still there?
I need to talk to Mindy, she said as a knot of fear settled in my gut. Her dad wants her to come on Wednesday, but
Laura, I said sharply. Mindys not here.
What? Did you let them go to the mall?
No, I said slowly. I let them go to your house.
Shit, she said. I cant believe it. I cant believe theyd do that.
They wanted to go patrolling. I said no.
You dont think theyd go by themselves, do you?
I considered it, remembered too clearly what Allie had asked. But I couldnt believe shed actually go through with it. No, I finally said. Allie knows shes not a match for a demon. She wouldnt put Mindy in that kind of danger. Shed only go patrolling if I was with her. Or, I added, realizing the awful truth, if her dad was with her.
Allie has no idea why Erics dangerous, Laura said.
I know. Stuart was beside me, the fear in my voice having brought him over. He clung tight to my hand and watched my face. Get over here, I said. And in the meantime, Ill call Eric.
I dialed Erics cell as I climbed back into my clothes, and both Stuart and I managed to be dressed by the time Laura and Cutter arrived at my house. Straight to voice mail, I said. His home phone and his cell.
What do we do? Laura asked, clinging hard to Cutters hand. To his credit, he didnt ask one question, though I knew he had to be baffled.
You and Cutter go back to your house in case they come back. Stuart stays here. And Im going to go see if I can find Eric.
Her eyes were wide and worried, but she nodded.
Be careful, Stuart said as I slipped on my jacket, checked my stiletto, and made sure I had enough holy water in the vial in my purse.
Trust me, I said. If hes out patrolling with them, the only one who has to worry tonight is Eric.
I kept trying, constantly pushing the redial button on my phone as I sped over the San Diablo streets toward the beach.
Hello?
Eric? I almost slammed into the back of a Mercedes I was so surprised to hear his voice. Where the hell are you?
At home. Why?
Mindy and Allie. Are they with you?
No. He said, his voice sharpening. Why?
Youre sure? Dammit, Eric, if youve taken them out patrolling, Im
I said they arent here. Im not him. Im not Odayne. And still you dont fucking trust me.
Trust? I snapped back, remembering his words at the mansion. Remembering the look in his eye. Dammit, Eric, youve been lying to me.
What the hell are you talking about?
Never seen the dagger? No clue where it is or what it looks like? Youve got drawings of it, Eric. A whole notebook of drawings and notes.
The hell I do, he said, but the force had gone out of his voice, and I stayed quiet, realizing that he needed to process the words. Jesus, Katie. I didnt know.
I drew in a breath and gripped the steering wheel tighter, desperately wanting to believe him, but not knowing if I should. And, yes, knowing that even if what he said was true, that in and of itself was terrifying.
You really dont know where the girls are? I asked, this time more softly.
I dont, he said. But Ill come over. Ill help you look.
Thanks, but
My phone beeped and I pulled it away from my ear long enough to look at it, then let out a relieved breath when I saw that the call was coming from Allie.
Its her, I said.
If theres trouble, call me.
I promised I would, then clicked over to my daughter, and was immediately blasted by a stream of Im sorry, Im sorry, Im sorry!
Theyre safe, Stuart said, taking the phone from Allie. Come home.
I did, cutting over the streets in record time to find both girls sitting quiet and forlorn on the sofa. Laura and Cutter had come back, and now they were pacing the living room with Stuart.
We werent going to patrol on our own, Allie said the moment I came in. Honest. And so we headed to Daddys.
I saw Cutters brow furrow at that, but decided that now wasnt the time to worry about it.
I talked to him, I said, anger rising. He swore he hadnt seen you.
He didnt, Allie said, quickly rising to his defense. We saw him.
And Nadia, Mindy added.
They were going upstairs. You know. To his apartment.
And we didnt figure it would be a good idea to interrupt.
No, I said, forcing my voice to stay calm. I dont expect it would be.
So we came back.
How? Stuart asked. Neither of you has a car.
Joann, Allie said. She was going to the beach to meet some guy, and we tagged along. And then when we said we werent staying at Daddys, she brought us back. I think she decided to blow off her date.
Good, I said, wondering if all the teenagers in town had gone insane. Maybe there was a full moon or something.
This conversation isnt over, Laura said to Mindy. Home. Now.
And you, I said to Allie. Upstairs.
As soon as they all left, I looked at Stuart, my head shaking. Its all spiraling out of control, I said.
You need to tell her, Stuart said. She needs to understand the truth about her father.
I know, I said, rubbing my forehead. But its two different issues, isnt it? And even if everything was peachy keen with Erichell, even if none of us in this house knew a damn thing about demonsshe still shouldnt have done this. She shouldnt have gone out on her own. She knows better, I said, thinking back to the lastand only other timethat shed snuck out of the house. A time when shed nearly gotten killed.
I know, said Stuart gently. But keep in mind that she came back on her own. Allies a good kid.
At that, I raised my eyebrows.
The operative word being kid, he admitted. But she reined it in. Thats more than a lot of fourteen-year-olds would do.
I nodded, but I didnt say anything. Because the truth was, that was what worried me. Because fourteen became fifteen and that became sixteen.
And with each year came more independence. More defiance. And definitely more danger.
I woke to the sound of someone moving stealthily through the house, and without even realizing I was moving, I was out of bed with my stiletto in my hand.
Whasgoinon? Stuart mumbled as he pulled my now-empty pillow toward him.
Just getting a snack. Go back to sleep. If there was a demon downstairs, Stuart would be pissed in the morning. But Id rather deal with his irritation about missing the action than have to watch his back while I checked out our house.
I moved slowly down the hall, avoiding the creaky spot as I peeked my head in Timmys room. Hed managed to maneuver himself completely upside down, and now his feet were on his pillow, and Boo Bear was clutched tight in his arms. He snored softly as he slept, sounding a little snotty and wheezy, and I made a mental note to put him to bed tomorrow with a humidifier and some Vicks VapoRub. Until then, Id cover him with an extra blanket, but Id do it after I checked the rest of the house.
I pulled the door closed and moved on to Allies room, which was bathed in the soft pink glow of the wall flowers shed picked up from Ikea. Plastic blooms with lights behind them, six of which now outlined her window in stark contrast to the opposing wall with its martial arts posters and display cases for swords and knives. The latter were new, as Allie had only recently started haunting thrift stores and flea markets for bits of antique weaponry. On the whole, I had no objections; after all, if she wanted to be a Hunter, I wanted her to be the best, most focused Hunter she could be. The combination of focus and training and interest translated to skill.
But at the same time, Ill admit I missed the posters of the boy band of the moment and the hours on the telephone in the evening talking with her friends about absolutely nothing. Id never had the high school experience; Id never really had the chance to be a teenage girl. And Id desperately wanted my daughter to have a different kind of childhood.
Sometimes things dont turn out the way you planned. And though I mourned my daughters lost innocence, Im honest enough to admit, privately, to a hum of self-satisfaction and pride, that she wanted to be like me.
Right then, I feared she might be doing exactly that.
She wasnt in her bed, which meant that either it was Allie I had heard moving quietly through the house, or else shed heard the sound, too, and had slipped out of bed to go battle our intruder.
Not an option I cared for, and I was back out the door and moving quietly down the stairs even as the possibility occurred to me. I told myself she was simply restless; after all, the alarm hadnt tripped, and I was certain Id set it. Probably she was curled up on the couch reading a romance, or sitting at the kitchen table stuffing her face with forbidden ice cream, and when I saw her I was going to feel downright foolish for getting so worked up over nothing.
That was it, I told myself. Nothing major. Just a teenager.
Even so, I moved with care, watching my back as I slipped through the living room, peering into shadows as I made my way toward the darkened kitchen.
Not one light was on downstairs, the only illumination coming from the light under the stovetop vent hood that I keep on as a matter of habit. It glowed a muted yellow, the anorexic light barely illuminating the kitchen beyond.
Still, I saw nothing moving in the dark and heard nothing rustling in the shadows. And as I moved closer, my worry spiked. My daughter wasnt in her bedroom, she wasnt in the living room, and the kitchen was too dark and too quiet.
Shit, shit, shit.
I told myself it was nothing. That I was unreasonably worried. That I would have heard a struggle if a demon had broken in and gotten to my daughter.
And I was damn certain that she wasnt going to be sneaking out again. Not after what had happened earlier in the evening.
So what was going on?
I didnt know, and that scared me, the tempo of my heart accentuating my fear. Training, however, took over and I moved with purpose and stealth into the breakfast area.
I was, honestly, prepared for anything.
Anything, that is, but what I saw: my daughter, head down at the table, shoulders shaking with muted sobs.
I was at her side in a heartbeat. Allie. I put my arms around her and she jumped, her eyes wild, then focused as she looked at me. She gasped, then threw her arms around me, pressed her face to my chest, and cried and cried and cried.
Id stooped to hug her, and now I balanced on my heels, one hand holding the side of the table so that we both wouldnt topple over. With my free hand I stroked her hair while I made soothing mommy noises, all the while mentally racing through the various possibilities that had brought on such histrionics.
This, I knew, was more than the fact that shed gotten into trouble earlier. True, Allie was a good kid and rarely got into the kind of trouble shed seen last night, but she also had a thick skin. More than that, she was smart enough to know when she deserved the trouble that came her way. If she was mad about her dressing-down, it was because she knew she deserved it. But these werent the sobs of a kid who was angry at herself. These were the sobs of a breaking heart.
I remembered the conversation Id overheard at the theater, and wondered if I needed to go out and kick Charlies butt. But even that didnt feel right. This wasnt about a boy.
And as my heart twisted in my chest, I had the low, sinking feeling that I did know why her heart was breaking.
Allie. Gently, I pushed her head off of me and scooted back, releasing myself from her hold. I took her hands in mine, then tugged another chair out with my foot. I sat down, still holding her hands and looking into her miserable, tear-streaked face. What is it?
You shoulda told me, Mom, she said, then wiped her dripping nose with the sleeve of her baseball-style jersey. God, Mom, why didnt you tell me?
I winced, wanting to pull her close again and tell her Id kept secrets only because I wanted to protect her. But I couldnt go there yet. Not without knowing exactly what was upsetting her. What is it you think you know, Allie? What havent I told you? I swallowed, praying she didnt know the truth about her father.
But even before she spoke, I knew from the pain in her eyes that my prayers would go unanswered today. She knew.
So help me, somehow, shed learned the truth about Eric.
Allie, I repeated, this time with more urgency. Tell me.
Its Daddy, she said, her words sucking all my hope from the room. Theres a demon inside my dad. The words came out barely intelligible, strangled with sobs, and she was back in my arms again, my hands stroking, my voice murmuring, and my mind thinking murderous thoughts about Erics parents for what they had done to their son. For what they were doing to my family.
I dont know how long we stayed like that, me holding her, stroking her, loving her. And wishing like hell I could make the hurt go away. When she was little, Id nursed her with kisses, smiley-face bandages and Bactine. Somehow, I didnt think that would work tonight.
When her sobs finally gave way to sniffles and then struggled, gasping breaths, I leaned back, one hand still touching, but trying to give her some space. She looked up at me with red, puffy eyes that held nothing but sadness.
You knew all along, she said, her voice as flat as cardboard. Why didnt you tell me?
A thousand lies sprang to mind, but I settled for the truth. This, I said, nodding at her. I wanted to spare you this.
How? Its there. Its in him.
Maybe not forever, I said, and saw the tiniest bit of hope in her eyes. Maybe not if I can help it.
And me, she said. You have to let me help.
Could I stop you?
That earned me a smile. No way.
Didnt think so. I brushed her hair out of her eyes and forced myself not to pull her close again. She was growing up, my girl, and shed proved numerous times that she could stand on her own. How did you find out?
I guess I didnt really know until right now. But it was all there, you know? Id seen all the signs, but I hadnt really started putting them together until I was doing this research. But it made sense. Daddys temper lately. Its kinda sharp, you know?
I did know. I wasnt certain that Allie had noticed, but apparently, she had.
And you didnt want me to patrol with him alone, and every time I said I was going over there, you freaked.
I didnt freak, I said indignantly.
Like, duh. You so totally did.
Maybe a slight discomfort, I said, but not a freak-out.
She shrugged. And then I started this research, about Odayne. And theres all this stuff about how hes bound inside a person until the time when he bursts forth. And I thought about the Alien movies, and how the creature bursts out and how in the last one it was like Ripley was the creatures mom or something and
I held up a hand. Allie, sweetheart, I havent got a clue what youre talking about.
She sighed, and I felt like the most clueless mother on the planet. Theres Odayne, she said curtly. Bound in a human. Then theres Daddy. And his temper, your freakoutishness, and it all just came together. She blinked owlishly at me. But I still wasnt sure. I still didnt really know. And I hated myself for even thinking it. But now . . . youre here . . . and you said . . . and theres no way to avoid it. Because its true. Oh, God. Its really true.
It was my turn to sigh. Oh, baby, I said, stroking her hair. Im so sorry. I managed a small smile. But theres one thing you got wrong. I didnt freak out.
She rolled her eyes. Delude yourself all you want. You totally freaked.
Maybe a little, I admitted. Dont tell? Itll tarnish my kick-ass Demon Hunter persona.
My lips are sealed, she said, following that up with the genuine smile Id been hoping for.
We sat in silence for a moment, watching Kabit stalk around, probably wondering why no one was hopping up to get him a kitty treat.
How? she asked. How can he have . . . you know . . . inside him?
I considered telling her that I didnt know and that it didnt matter, but I couldnt manage it. Instead, I got up and went to the freezer, then returned with two frozen Snickers bars.
Its bad, huh? she asked.
Its definitely not good, I agreed. And I dont know everything. But I do know that it started with Erics parents. With your grandparents, I said. And then I drew in a breath and told her exactly what I knew.
She didnt speak a word while I told her the story Id parsed together from what Eric had told me, from Father Corlettis input, and from my own experience. And when I finished the story, she dried her tears, nodded, and whispered, Thank you.
I held tight to her hand. Are you okay?
Yeah. I mean, no. Not really. But I guess I will be. I guess I dont really have a choice, do I?
I shook my head, more proud and more sad than I could ever remember being. And never had I felt more exhausted.
Its not even four, I said, after I was pretty certain the tears had passed and werent coming back. You can still catch a few hours before school.
She nodded then pushed back from the table and stood. I pulled her down for a quick kiss, but stayed there as she moved toward the living room. She stopped in the doorway and turned back to me. Well save him, right? Odaynes not going to win, is he? Were going to get Daddy back?
I felt the tears well in my eyes as I looked back at my daughter, wishing I could lie and tell her that I knew everything would be all right.
I couldnt, though. Not to Allie. Not anymore.
So I said the truth, which was the best I could do.
I hope so, kiddo. Were going to try like hell, and I really, really hope so.
I found Eddie already in the living room recliner when I stumbled, blinking, down the stairs. I hadnt gotten nearly enough sleep, but the dishwasher repair guy was supposed to be coming sometime between eight and noon, and if I wasnt awake, hed be there at eight. If I was awake, of course, hed pull into the driveway at eleven-fifty. Thats why I prefer demons; with repairmen, you can never win.
The pull of coffee was dragging me toward the kitchen, but the little black-and-white composition book in Eddies lap snagged my attention and halted my progress. And why wouldnt it? The little book contained my notes; all the experiences Id had as a Demon Hunter in San Diablo.
Light reading? I asked, dryly.
He glanced up, peering at me from half-moon reading glasses. I never talked to my Rice Krispies, he said, giving the page a thump with his thumb and forefinger. Defamation of character. Thats what this is. Talk to my cereal. Phhhbt.
I stared at him for a moment, considered arguing with him, and decided that without coffee, Id only lose the battle. So I left him and continued on.
Not surprisingly, he shuffled into the kitchen after me. Honestly, woman. These reports read like a diary. Wheres the detail? The analysis?
I pulled out the carafe and found it empty, which caused me to silently curse my husband. Hed rolled out of bed and into the shower at seven, and Id heard the garage door rise forty-five minutes later. Hed had plenty of time to make coffee, but did he? Noooo. Probably planning to drive by Starbucks, which was all good and well except that it would have been nice if hed made a pot for me.
I stomped to the freezer to pull out the bag of ground coffee as Eddie droned on about the lack of quality in my accounts. Neither the lack of coffee nor Eddie did much to improve my mood. I tend to wake up needing an infusion of caffeine. Couple that with a lack of sleep, and Im pretty much a walking nightmare until the first brewed cup.
I shuffled back to Mr. Coffee, dumped the grounds into the basket, and pushed the button to start, then turned around and faced Eddie, who was muttering about my embarrassing lack of details. Fueled or not, I figured I didnt have a choice. In case you forgot, Id been retired for fifteen years when I put that report together. Id only done it out of habit, too, pulling a composition book out of the box of miscellaneous school supplies I pick up every August on the cheap. I didnt even consider it a report. More like notes to myself. Besides, its not like you werent there for most of that stuff.
Aint even like you were keeping accurate notes. He snorted. Rice Krispies, my fanny.
I hid my smile, both amused by his reaction and also pleased that he truly didnt seem to recall just how loopy hed been when Id found him drugged up in the Coastal Mists Nursing Home.
Dont know what youre smiling about, he said, and I made a valiant effort to wipe the smirk from my mouth. Now this heres a bit more helpful, he said, holding up a more recent book.
I groaned. Youre actually reading all of my reports?
Hey now, girlie. As your alimentatore, I have to warn you that impudence will not be tolerated.
Ill make a note of it.
And damn straight I am. Every single one of them. We got a situation here with Eric, and nobody in the worlds closer to that boy than you are. So Im reading and Im learning. He tapped the composition book, then tapped his head. Its all bubbling away in here, mixing together like a soup. If theres a link, a fact, something we overlooked, Ill find it. You can count on Eddie.
I believed him. Despite the fact that he looked absolutely harmless standing there in faded blue flannel pajamas, his chin as bristly as a cactus and his eyebrows like caterpillars about to crawl away, I absolutely believed him. And to prove it, I tossed my arms around him and gave him a big hug, satisfied when I pulled away to find him blushing.
Youre distracting me, woman, he said. I got questions for you.
Shoot, I said.
Right here, he said, flipping pages and finally tapping the pages. This bit about you and Eric tied together. What did Father C mean by that?
I frowned, remembering how Father Corletti had dropped that little bomb on me. Remember when I was afraid that maybe Id opened the way for a demon to move into Eric by using the Lazarus Bones?
He snorted. I remember. Not much to worry about after all, seeing as the beastie was already inside him.
I grimaced. Yeah, well, Father Corletti told me that I didnt open the door for anything new and bad to come back down into Eric. But he did tell me one thing that happened. And its a big thing.
Tied together, Eddie said, tapping the page. Spit it out, girl.
Its just what it sounds like, I said. Or at least Father Corletti says so. Were tied to each other. Or, rather, hes tied to me. Its like I made him a part of me or something. If I die, he dies.
Eddie leaned back in his chair, looking smug. And there you go.
I gaped at him, confused. And there IOh! Why didnt I see it before?
You really do have a free pass, girlie girl. They kill you, they kill your boy, too.
But why would they care? The demon can still live in Erics body, right?
Didnt before, Eddie said. Eric died in San Francisco. Body was buried and Erics soul and the demon shot out into the ether.
I frowned, because he was absolutely right. But the first demon tried to kill me. So did Lisa.
Maybe they werent following the party line. You said yourself Eric told you he didnt want a hair on your head harmed.
Yeah, I said. But hes Eric.
Is he? Was he that day? Right then?
I licked my lips, not wanting to answer. But Eddie was right. No matter how much I twisted it around to look at it, there was no escaping the fact that Eddie was right. I told him as much, too, then watched his smug expression broaden. But you did talk to the Rice Krispies, I said, unable to resist.
He snorted. Dont mean nothing. Youre only crazy if they talk back.
Who? Allie asked, bounding into the kitchen in a knee-length T-shirt.
I glanced at the clock. Ten past eight.
Cereal, Eddie said.
Oh, she said, then looked to me for help.
I wasnt biting. Why arent you at school?
Hello? Up like half the night, remember? You were with me. She eyed the hissing coffeemaker. Is it ready?
Get in line, I said. Honestly, Allie, you cant just decide to stay home and
Ive got a bead on Lilith, she announced, effectively shutting me up and causing Eddie to put down the composition book he was undoubtedly about to begin cross-examining me with.
Say again? I said.
Lilith, she said, looking firmly at me and Eddie in turn. I figured it out. I know where to find her. I know exactly who she is. More important, I know exactly what she wants.
Thirteen
She wants to be like her lover, Allie said. Like Odayne. Can I have a Pop-Tart?
Come again? Eddie said, but I got it. I got it, and I didnt like it.
She wants humanity, I said. Not simply to be in a human body, but she wants a taste of a human soul. Oh, God.
Allie nodded, and since I was making no progress toward her breakfast, she got up and went to the pantry herself.
Nadia, I said, feeling more than a little sick. Shes time-sharing with Nadia.
Thats what I figured, too, Allie said, from inside the pantry. Dont we have strawberry ones? I ignored that, knowing that her mind wasnt going to stay on tasty breakfast treats for long. You said she was really strong in the theater, right?
I grimaced and absently rubbed my shoulder. I assumed shed been working out. Apparently she was being a little more industrious than that.
But its not the same, right? Shes not inside Nadia the same way that Odaynes inside Daddy?
No, I agreed. Shes not.
When a demon possesses a human, theres a Linda Blair/ Exorcist thing going on. Spinning heads, frothing at the mouth. The whole Hollywood spiel. But if a human willingly allows a demon to move in and share the body, then theres no external sign. Cooperation is key. Its different from what was happening with Erichis soul was involved, not the bodyand Lilith and Nadia werent actually one. Not yet anyway.
Time-sharing isnt going to be enough for Lilith, I said, standing and starting to pace. Shes been around since before time began. She doesnt understand humanity, but she wants to. And shes not going to want to do it by halves.
Shell want to merge. Entwine her essence with Nadias soul.
Nadia doesnt know. She couldnt possibly have gone willingly into this arrangement if she believed she was going to lose herself.
Allie rolled her eyes. Mom. Please. This is Nadia were talking about. For one, the bitch is totally delusional, and probably figures itll only turn out good for her. And for two, if theres power at the end of it, shes gonna be all over it.
Once again, my kid was right. Rough around the edges, but right.
How, though? I asked, thinking aloud. How would she manage?
Ceremony, Eddie said. What else.
I gawked at him. You know of a ceremony like that?
Hell no, he said. But you been around as long as I have, you learn one things for certain. Someway, somewhere, someones gonna come up with another damn ceremony.
I smiled, remembering that Laura had said something very similar.
Eddie shoved back from the table as the sharp beep of a horn sounded. Thats Rita. You two get on that.
Us? Youre the alimentatore.
So I am, girlie. But its your mans ass on the line, and between you two and the bitch, I think its personal. He paused, his attention turning to Allie. Call Forza first, though. Let em know what you got.
Forza, I repeated. You, the Lone Ranger of alimentatores is actually pulling Forza into the loop? On purpose?
Like I said when this started, this aint for me. Its for the kid. And if Forzas got a bead on this ceremony Liliths got planned, then we need to know. And that was some damned clever hoops the kid jumped through. Forza ought to know the kids got the goods.
The kids sitting right there, I pointed out.
So she is, he said, and a wide smile split his face. Youre doing damn good there, kid. Course I wouldnt expect anything less from my granddaughter. He winked, then turned and headed for the door, leaving Allie and me shaking our heads in wonder.
So should I? Call, I mean? She glanced at the clock, as if it held answers. What time is it in Rome now?
Just after five in the afternoon, I answered automatically. Go ahead and call. If you cant get Father Corletti directly, ask him to call back as soon as he can. Tell him its urgent.
Shouldnt you call?
Go on, I said, as the doorbell rang. And go in Stuarts study. Thats probably the dishwasher guy.
As it turned out, I was right; it was the dishwasher guy. Or, at least, it was a guy wearing a brown work shirt with Mr. Appliance embroidered on it. Under the circumstances, I didnt intend to take any chances.
I led him through the house to the kitchen, and once he was peering into my dishwasher, I took a vial of holy water out of my purse and poured it into one of Timmys plastic Dora the Explorer glasses. Then, feeling only slightly foolish, I marched over beside Mr. Appliance. See anything?
A sword, he said, which was so utterly completely off the beaten dishwasher path that I immediately tensed, certain Id invited into my home a demon with a sense of humor.
What? I said, and when he pulled his head out of the mechanism, I tossed the contents of the cup on his face, then watched as he spit and spluttered, but absolutely didnt burn.
Okay, time for me to be more than a little embarrassed.
Im so sorry! I tripped, I lied. And now youre all wet. Oh, dear. I passed him a towel, all the while silently chastising him for mentioning a sword. I mean, honestly. What was the man thinking? Are you okay?
Fine, he said, drying himself off. Usually its a burst hose instead of a customer dousing me, but Im used to getting wet on the job. He rocked back on his heels and pointed to the inside of my dishwasher. You got yourself a little army in there, he said. Plugging up the drain.
I do? I leaned over and peered in, for the first time noticing the green plastic arm extending up, waving a sword as if about to launch an attack on the silverware. I see, I said. I cast a backward glance toward the living room, where my own little demon sat innocently watching the Backyardigans . I have a feeling I know how that happened.
Oh yeah, he said cheerfully. See it all the time. You want I should fix?
I half-considered dumping the job on Stuart, who I firmly believed should have found the army when Id first complained of escaping bubbles. But I owed Mr. Appliance for a service call anyway, and I didnt think it would take too long to free the army. Besides, if I didnt get the thing fixed, Id be spending another day or two washing dishes by hand, and that was something I really wasnt looking forward to.
Once he was happily disassembling the dishwasher, I headed out into the living room to check on Timmy, who was singing along merrily about a Yeti. I gave him a kiss, found myself thoroughly ignored in favor of Nickelodeon, and continued on toward Stuarts study. Allie was hanging up the phone as I came in, grinning broadly. You got through to Father?
He told me I did really awesome work.
You did, I agreed. Does he have any ideas about the binding ceremony between her and Nadia?
Not yet, but hes going to check the archives and get back to us. But Mom, he said I should come to Rome! He said Id like looking over the resources and that hed totally love to meet me.
I know he would, I said, smiling.
No, Mom. You dont get it. Her eyes were bright and excited. He didnt say it because he has to ask you first, but Im positive that he was gonna tell me I could go there and train. He thinks Im good, Mom. He says I take after you.
My smile broadened. Did he?
Uh-huh. And Daddy, too, only I know he meant the nondemon stuff, you know?
Im sure he meant the nondemon stuff, I said, once again struck cold by the fact that throughout our entire relationship, the demon stuff had always been hidden under the surface.
So can I?
I blinked. Can you what?
She rolled her eyes and sighed, deeply frustrated with her idiot mother. Can I go to Rome and train?
Oh. The question caught me off guard, and I sat down.
Please, please, please! I mean, I should, right? Thats what Hunters do, unless theyre rogue. Isnt it?
Its what Hunters do, I admitted. And although I couldnt believe I was even letting this conversation progress, I heard myself asking, Is it what you want to do?
Are you kidding? She looked at me with the same bafflement and amazement I would have seen if Id asked if she wanted her own car. I mean, duh.
Not the most articulate, but she got the point across.
Youre sure? No hesitations? Just duh?
Her brow crinkled, making a line appear above her nose. Well, yeah. I mean, I want to do this. Is that bad?
Is that bad? The question rattled around inside me as I considered my answer. What should I tell her? What did I wish someone would have told me, all those years ago?
Not that Id had a choice, not really. Id been raised in the life. For the life.
But it was nice to live in a fantasy world where I had a say in deciding my destiny.
Mom? Its not that complicated a question.
I wasnt sure I agreed with that, but I caught the undertone of teenage impatience and abandoned my own musings. Tell me this, I said. Why?
She blinked. Why? Why what?
Why do you want to go to Rome? Why do you want to be a Hunter?
Are you kidding? Why wouldnt I?
I could think of a lot of reasons, not the least of which was the fact that if she walked awayif she went to college and got a job in a bankthe odds were good that no one she knew would ever again have a demon inside them, she wouldnt spend her life fearing for the next attack, and shed most likely survive to see her own grandchildren. I could have said all that, but I didnt. Instead, I simply said her name. She heard the rest in my voice. Like Ive always said, Ive got a smart kid.
I cant walk away simply because it scares me, she said. I mean, could you?
I did, I reminded her. Your father and I both walked away because we wanted a family. Neither one of us thought this was a good life for kids.
Well, see?
See what? As far as I knew, I hadnt just brilliantly bolstered one of her arguments.
It doesnt matter what you do, Mom. It finds you. It finds you, and it sucks you back in. And the second time you didnt walk away, she added, pointing a stern finger in my direction. You didnt have to sign back up with Forza, right? But you did, and you told me why. Do you remember?
Not specifically, I said dryly. But Im sure it was profound.
It was. You said you had the ability to fight evil, and that meant you had the responsibility, too.
Youre right, I said, touched that shed not only listened so well, but had taken my words to heart. That was profound.
More than profound, Mom. Its true. This is big stuff, you know? The biggest. And most of the people out there dont even know whats going on. Its like a secret war, you know? And for whatever reason, I got drafted.
You could dodge, I said. Head up to Canada.
Ha-ha. Forget drafted. I enlisted. Signed up with eyes wide open because I think this is important. And yeah, I get the risks, and yeah, I know you might not get grandkids. But its good. Its good versus evil, and its not sponsored by Nintendo, and evil keeps getting her claws in, you know? And if I can help stop thatif I can do even the tiniest little thingthen I think its worth it. And oh, God, Mom, youre crying!
I am not, I lied.
Do you really think it would be a terrible mistake?
I shook my head. No. On the contrary, I think that was one hell of a mature speech from a girl who doesnt even have her learners permit.
Yeah? She preened a little. Cool. So I can go?
Im not saying no, I said. But I am saying that I think youre too young.
Too young! But you were only fourteen!
And I didnt have a family, I said. Give it some time, see if you still want it.
I will, she said grumpily.
I laughed. Allie, give me a break. Im not saying no. But I dont want you to rush it. And I also want to see what your dad thinks about it.
She swallowed, then licked her lips. We both knew that I wouldnt be asking her dad anything about her soon.
One or two more days, I said firmly. One or two more and then well go to his apartment and ask him together.
Okay, she said, her voice small. Then she seemed to buck up as she turned to grin at me. Maybe hell think fifteens not too young.
I sighed. Loudly.
There is one other reason I want to do it, you know.
Yeah? Whats that?
Being a Hunter is just too dang cool.
I think thats the last of them, Betty Lackland said, plunking five more musty, leather-bound books on the table where Laura and I had settled ourselves in the San Diablo County Library. Wed come here after dropping Timmy at day care and Allie at school, armed with the appropriate note from her mother to excuse her tardiness.
We werent only in the library, though. We were in the rare books room, a section that was both well-stocked and well-renowned, due in large part to Erics efforts when he worked here.
I, of course, had assumed he was happily ensconced in your average, everyday rare books librarian job. Pulling in items of interest, cataloging them, slapping Library of Congress or Dewey Decimal numbers on them, or doing whatever it was that librarians did.
Naturally, Id assumed wrong.
My husband had been using his acquisitions budget to acquire rare books and manuscripts that touched on his situation. That maybe even documented similar situations. More important, one that maybe documented a way out.
At least, I hoped he had. Id already reviewed all the books hed acquired personally. If we didnt find a clue in the library, I feared I was running out of ideas.
So were hoping he either didnt get around to reviewing all these book, or whatever cure he found didnt work right the first time, right? Laura said as Betty left the room. It still seems like a long shot to me.
I nodded; wed been over this ground before. If Eric had figured a way out of his unwanted relationship with a tag-along demon, he would have done whatever was necessary to put that information into effect. The fact that Odayne was still with him meant he hadnt found the answers in his books. Either that, or it meant hed tried the answer and it didnt work.
All this ceremonial stuff, it has to happen in just the right time and in just the right way, I said. If he tried it and something didnt go the way it was supposed to, its possible he wrote it off as a bogus ceremony.
And trying again could do the trick, she said. She scowled at the mile-high stack of books Betty had brought in. You want the top of the stack or the bottom?
Lets just grab and go, I said, then watched as she pulled a book from the top and carefully opened it. I followed suit, only to discover that my selection was in Latin.
Great, I said. If the answers in here, well never find it. Unlike the books at home, which Eric could have filled with bookmarks and marked with sticky notes, these public books would have to be marked less obviously.
Look for bits of paper between the pages, she suggested. He might have marked a page and forgotten. He might have even written in the book with pencil.
I lifted a brow, thinking of my bibliophile husband. Probably not, I said. But Ill keep my eyes open. Figuring that any book with a solution to our problem would have been opened, poured over, and possibly photocopied, I closed the book and examined the side, looking to see if there was any place where the pages didnt slide together just so, any place where the spine seemed stretched. Any indication at all to indicate that a book had sat open and developed even the slightest hint of a crease.
Naturally, I found nothing. Not surprising, considering it was not only my first book to examine, but that Id picked it from the stack at random. Still, hope springs eternal. Since there were apparently no shortcuts, though, I flipped slowly through the musty pages looking for anythingannotation, marking, even creepy illustrationsthat might suggest we were on the right track.
I found nothing. And five books later, Id still found nothing. My nose, however, tickled from the dust.
At least this wasnt like searching through old records in the cathedral archives. Those boxes were kept in the basement and, at least until reviewed, not kept very tidy. Dust wasnt my problem then, bugs were. Libraries, thank goodness, were blissfully bug-free.
Anything? I asked Laura as she closed a leather-bound volume with fancy gold writing.
Not a thing. Are we wasting time?
I frowned. I guess we wont know that until were done looking.
She glanced up at the clock. You staying or coming with me? Since Laura was working that night at Cutters, our plan was for her to pick up Allie and Mindy and take them with her. Convenient for me since Allie could get in an extra class. As for Mindy, she could either cheer her friend on or do homework.
Im staying, I said. Ill pick up the girls after class and take them to my house after we pick up Timmy. If you want Mindy to stay the night . . . I added, letting my voice trail off into suggestiveness.
Were not that serious yet, she said. Honestly, I still cant figure out why hes interested in me at all.
I shrugged. Brains and good looks, I said. After all, you can balance his books. And you do look cute in a gi, even if your crescent kicks are for shit.
Laura laughed, which was just the reaction I was going for.
Fine. Okay. Im off. She nodded at the still tall but significantly less intimidating pile of books. Ill expect a full report in the morning.
If my eyes dont fall out from the strain, youll have it.
An hour later, I was beginning to think that I hadnt been exaggerating. My eyes were dry and sandy, and no matter how many times I blinked, I couldnt seem to clear them. My throat felt scratchy, most likely from the mustiness of the old books. And I was absolutely certain that the windowless walls of the rare books room were closing in on me.
In other words, I wanted the hell out of there.
There were, however, only three books left. At least in this batch. Betty had come bounding in twenty minutes earlier to inform me that shed forgotten to tell me about five titles that had been shipped down to UCLA as part of an inter-library loan. Shed requested the books return and promised shed call me when they were in.
Oh, yay.
In the meantime, in the spirit of thoroughness, I had to look through this last trio of tomes. I pulled the top book off and turned to the first page. When I saw that it was in Latin, I almost put it aside, but, honestly, I was too afraid of missing something important. So I flipped pages, looking for familiar Latin words or clues that Eric had found something interesting in the book. About two-thirds of the way in, I found what I was looking fora page, completely missing. It had been ripped free, leaving a scar of jagged, yellowed paper behind. And although my Latin is for shit, I could at least catch the gist of the words on the surrounding pages. The section was talking about trapping and binding evil. And if the missing page was specific to Odayne, then Id just found what we were looking for.
Too bad it had gone missing.
Frowning, I made a note of the book, then left the rare books room and headed for the circulation desk. The rare books dont circulate, right?
Thats right, Betty said. Im sorry its inconvenient, but its the only way we can ensure the integrity of the material.
Right. No problem. I totally get it. But is it possible to tell me whose pulled a particular book?
Well, now, I dont know. She pressed her fingertips to her mouth, and I could just imagine her head filling with concerns about policy, privacy, and the First Amendment.
I just dont want to duplicate work with my team, I said, hoping that made sense despite the fact that Id never given her specifics as to why I wanted to look at Erics acquisitions, much less laid out for her the duties of my imaginary team. If I can review the list for this book, I can rule things out quickly enough.
Her lips pursed as she checked the computer, then relaxed as she looked back at me. I dont suppose I can do much damage telling you one name, now can I?
Just one? Since when?
Since Eric died, dear. These books dont get that much use. Fine collection he pulled together, dont get me wrong. But it doesnt get much practical use, you see.
Right. So, um, who looked at the book?
David Long. She peered up at me. Do you know him, dear?
I nodded, smiled bright, and tried not to let her see that my insides were churning. Oh, yes. Hes on the team, all right. How long ago did he request the book? I expected her to cite a date that corresponded more or less to Erics return in Davids body. After all, surely he would have come straight here and started to research the problem again.
So I wasnt at all prepared when Betty beamed owlishly at me from behind her silver frames, then firmly announced that David had been in only three short days before.
That recent? I asked. Youre sure? I was leaning against the counter, trying unsuccessfully to lean in and see her computer screen.
Of course, dear. Is something wrong?
No, I said, trying to convince myself as much as Betty. Of course not. Thanks so much for checking. I started to step away, then thought of another question. Has Mr. Long been to the rare books room often?
You are a hard taskmaster, arent you? she asked as she tapped keys. But its good to check up on your employees. Hmmm. She peered up at me. I hope your Mr. Long isnt supposed to come regularly, because the last time he was here wasgoodnessfour years ago.
I swallowed. David was still David four years ago.
And when he was in the other day, I asked, did he request any other books?
Her eyes scanned the monitor as her fingers clicked. Then she shook her head. No, just this one. She peered at my face. Youre sure theres not a problem?
Positive, I said. But I couldnt escape the reality that something was very, very wrong. Yes, it was possible that David was simply continuing the research hed started as Eric. And it was possible hed decided to do that by focusing on one random book.
More likely, though, was the scenario that played through my mind. That the page in question held my answerand the demon inside Eric didnt want me to have it.
The possibility turned my stomach, because if the answer lay on a page out of a rare booka page that had been stolenI had no way of getting that information back. It wasnt as if I could run down to Barnes & Noble and pick myself up another copy.
Dammit, Eric, I muttered. Couldnt you have fought? My fear, of course, was that he couldnt. That he was through fighting, and that Id run out of time.
Im sorry, dear? Betty said.
Nothing. Im wondering, is there a way to find out if other copies of that book exist?
Well, let me see. She began tapping at the keyboard, her rhythm more or less in tune with the rhythm of my own tapping foot. I can only access copies that have been databased online, andwhy yes. The Harry Ransom Center at the University of Texas has a copy, theres a facsimile copy in Prague, andoh! The Vatican library has a copy as well. She looked up at me. With a book this old, I wouldnt be surprised to learn those are the only copies in existence, she said, but I was no longer listening. My mind had stopped working at the mention of the Vatican.
Right there. The information was right there at Father Corlettis fingertips and theyd missed it. Most likely because the binding spell was unique to Odayne, and until a few days ago, no one had realized it was him we were dealing with.
Betty, you are a saint, I said, then leaned across the counter to give her a quick hug. I need to run, but Ill be back. I was gone before she had a chance to answer, my cell phone out, and my finger already pressed over the speed-dial button for Father Corletti.
Before I pushed, the phone buzzed in my hand. Irritated, I saw that it was Allie. Not now, honey. Ive got to call
Mom! Oh, God, Mommy!
Instantly, my heart was pounding, and I was racing for my car. Are you all right? Whats happened? Where
Cutters, she said. Im fine. Were fine. But, oh God, Mom! Get here fast.
Fourteen
I found the closed sign on the door when I got to Cutters, and the door locked. I was on the verge of smashing a rock through the glass when Laura rushed forward, looking both frazzled and exhausted. Thank God youre here, she said after shed unlocked the door and ushered me in. Cutter wanted to call the police, and he thinks Im crazy for
What happened? I interrupted, but by that time, I didnt need to ask. Wed passed the partition that blocked part of the view of the workout area from the front doors, and I could see for myself well enough.
What happened was that a demon had died, stabbed through the eye with a Maybelline mascara wand.
I turned and found Allie, who shrugged and looked slightly green. Mindy was doing her makeup, she said. It was handy.
Dammit, Kate, Cutter said. Im calling the cops. I should have called fifteen minutes ago. I dont know what the hell I was thinking.
No. Id been looking at the demonthe old man from Coastal Mists that Eric assured us hed killed. His face was now scarred with what I realized were holy water burns. Allie had been thorough, I thought, and felt a quick stab of pride. Now I looked up at Cutter and shook my head. You have to trust me on this, Sean, but this isnt a matter for the police.
In case you hadnt noticed, theres a body on my floor.
Yeah, I agreed. Under the circumstances, thats going to be inconvenient.
The crypt? Laura suggested. She was crouched on the ground near Mindy, who sat with her back to the wall, hugging her knees to her chest.
Are you okay? I asked her.
Mindy managed a quavering smile. I told Allie I thought all of this was cool. Now, Im not so sure. She looked at me with big brown eyes brimming with tears. It was gonna kill us, Aunt Kate. It was absolutely gonna kill us, and Allie stopped it.
Thats the only reason I havent called the cops, Cutter said. Jesus, Allie. Whats going to happen to her?
Laura gave Mindys head a kiss and then moved over to Cutter, getting right in his face. Allies going to be fine, she said. She didnt kill anyone.
I saw Cutters eyes shift to Allie, who shrugged and nodded. Hes not a person, Cutter. I swear to God.
But hes a body, I said firmly, trying to keep my mind on the problem. Cutter we could deal with. The body, we needed to get rid of. And the crypts are out of the question. The bishop doesnt know about the demons, and now isnt the time to tell him.
Demons. Cutters single word came out on a breath, and while I heard surprise, I also thought I heard a wisp of understanding. Or, maybe I was imagining things.
Should we take the body to Daddy? Allie asked.
I shook my head. Erics not going to be able to help us this time. I toed the demon, reining in the desire to kick the shit out of the corpse for attacking people I loved. He came in here? Attacked you?
Allie nodded. Said he was going to kill me and then all the rest of us. He meant it, too. Cutter went after him, and the demon knocked him all the way back there, she said, pointing to the far wall. Musta really hurt, but it gave me time to get my spritzer bottle out of my backpack, because I remembered what you said about not assuming anything.
Someones in the process of killing you, you defend yourself and worry about the demon/human thing later, I said. But good girl for remembering.
Yeah, well, I got him in the face, you know. And the water burned the shit out of him.
Water? Cutter said. That wasnt mace? Acid?
Holy water, I said, keeping my eyes on Allie. Then what?
I started whaling on him while he was clawing his face, and I shouted for Mindy to toss me something pointy, and she did and, well, there you go.
I couldnt hold the professional veneer any longer. I pulled her close and squeezed my eyes shut, afraid that once I started crying, I wouldnt be able to stop.
Hes dead, Mom, Allie said. Its over, and were all safe.
I nodded, snuffled, and pulled my head up. Hes dead, all right, I said. And apparently for the second time.
What? Laura asked, but I could tell from Allies expression that she already knew what I was going to say.
This is the man from the paper. The one we were going after at Coastal Mists.
Laura frowned. But I thought David told you that hed killed it.
David? Cutter asked. David Long?
Apparently he lied, I said, ignoring Cutter.
Youre right, then, Laura said. We cant ask him to do something about the body. Landfill?
I shook my head. Too dangerous. Hang on. Ive got an idea. I pulled out my cell phone, preparing to call Father Corletti and beg for a disposal team. Id been denied them in the pastwith Forza having all sorts of economic cutback problems, there simply werent teams availablebut in the past Id had other options.
Wait, Cutter said. Just wait a damn minute. What in the name of God is going on?
Hes got that right, Allie said, then started laughing so hard that I had to write it off to post-trauma hysterics.
Demons? Bodies? Holy water? Answers, Kate. And this time, I really want them.
I nodded. For a long time, Id known the day would come when Id share the truth with Cutter. And why not? I liked him. More than that, I trusted him.
I mean it, he said, apparently taking my silence for hesitation. Tell me whats going on. He reached out and took Lauras hand, pulling her slightly closer to him as he spoke.
I looked at the two of them and, in spite of everything else, I smiled. Go ahead, Laura, I said, as I moved across the room with my phone. Tell him everything.
Nobody leaves, nobody moves, I said, pointing to the cluster of people now in my living room. It was after six now, and Id insisted Stuart come home with pizza, which was now getting cold on the kitchen counter as everyone waited for me to finish running through my instructions. Im only going to be gone an hour or so, and I want everyone inside, safe and sound, when I get back.
We cant live like this every day, Kate, Stuart said. And the demon is dead.
There are always more demons, I countered. Suddenly tired, I sank down on the couch next to him. Everyone important to me was in that room. Stuart, Eddie, Allie, Timmy. Then Laura and Mindy and Cutter. The only one missing was Eric, and the fact that he wasnt in the roomwas no longer welcome in the roomhad thrown off my equilibrium.
Please, I said, all of my exhaustion flowing into my voice. Just for tonight. Dont argue. Eat pizza. Play stupid board games. Just let me have this one night of knowing youre together and that youre safe.
And what about us worrying about you? Stuart said.
I drew in a breath and shot Eddie a quick glance. Theyre not going to kill me.
Im still not understanding why that is, Laura said, an admission that Allie immediately seconded.
I dont understand how it works, either, I admitted. All I know is what Father Corletti told me, and considering Eric confirmed that they dont want to kill me, we have to assume its true.
That youre tied to Eric. Or at least to his soul, Stuart said, speaking through near-clenched teeth. I didnt blame him. Hard enough to know your wife still had ties to another man, and worse still if that man was turning out to be a demon.
I nodded, trying to keep my thoughts and demeanor in professional debrief mode. Right. When I brought him back from the dead
What? That from Cutter, but I chose to ignore it, figuring Laura could add in that detail later.
the magic worked a connection. If I die, he dies.
He-Daddy? Or he-Odayne?
I met my daughters eyes, and had to smile when I saw that she was standing straight and tall, using the same tricks I did to remain objective. Or, at least, as objective as possible. Honestly, I dont know. The connections with Eric, so it makes sense that hes the one who would die.
But that must kill Odayne, too, Laura said. Otherwise, I dont think theyd much care. I mean, theyre just interested in getting him a body, right? Him and Lilith. A matching set.
I had to agree. Right. Theyre being careful with me, because if Eric dies, then its San Francisco all over again, I said, referring to Erics death back when Allie was nine. Eric and Odayne would be back in the ether, and theyd have to wait for another chance to pop into a body. And that could take years, even decades.
The ether? Cutter asked, and this time I took pity on him.
Its where most demons are. Think of it as another dimension. Theyre only a problem to us if they manage to become corporeal. You know, get into a body.
A dead body, he said, this time looking to Laura, who nodded confirmation.
Mindy lifted her hand, as if she was in class. So youre safe right now because if they kill you, then Eric dies and Odayne goes poof with him?
I nodded. Looks that way.
Stuart moved to my side and took my hand. They may not be able to kill you, but they can hurt you, he said.
I managed a watery smile, knowing all too well that the hurt he referred to wasnt physical. At least not to me. Yeah. I know. I swallowed thickly, afraid the tears would start up again if I looked at Allie or Mindy or Laura. The tears had already flowed once, when we were still at Cutters waiting for the disposal team that Father Corletti had ordered up from Los Angeles. Theyd made great time, actually, and I think the sight of the team, in their matching scrub shirts and with their white cargo van, so efficient and controlled, had driven the truth home to Cutter. The shocked look on his face had vanished, replaced with a ferocity I knew only too well. He might not be trained at hunting demons, but he was one of the best fighters I knew, and if anything happened while I was gone, I felt better knowing he was there to fight.
I pushed up off the couch. Enough, I said. Its time. I couldnt put it off any longer. There were too many things about which I had to confront Eric. The dead demon. The missing page. Lock the doors. Dont let anybody in. Be safe.
Mom, Allie said, but this time without the eye roll. We know.
Call me if Father Corletti calls back, I said. Hed promised to go straight to the archives and look for the book with the missing page. With any luck, wed have a binding spell for Odayne by morning.
Okay, I said. Im off. I headed toward the garage, Stuarts I love you floating after me.
I paid attention as I backed the van out of the driveway, carefully watching to make sure no one managed to sneak inside the garage as the door was open. I saw nothing, and thought that was, at least, something. Now, alone in the car, I could finally let myself go. I didnt cryI didnt have the time for that sort of luxurybut it felt like the tears were flooding my insides. Fear and worry and utter horror that my dangerous world had intruded so far into the real world.
Except it was all real, wasnt it? Demons and monsters and things that wanted to hurt me and my family and my friends. All real and all horrible, and what had happened today at Cutters only underscored how impotent I really was. Even with all my training, all my knowledge, all of my secret peepholes into the messy netherworld. None of it mattered. Not really. Not when the demons were going to use the people I care about to get to me.
I wanted to say that I was a strong enough person that I could withstand their dirty tactics, but I wasnt sure that I was. Theyd gotten to me this time, and the one person I needed to pull me back to center wasnt going to be able to help me. I knew thatwas absolutely certain Id lost himbut damned if I wasnt going to try to get him back. Because if I could save him, then maybe I could save all of us.
Hang on, Eric, I said, not realizing how tightly I was holding the steering wheel. Dammit, fight.
I called his apartment from the road and got no answer. That was fine. If he was screening my calls, Id confront him when I saw him. And if he really was gone, well, that was fine, too. Id break in and search his apartment. With any luck, Id find the page from the book. With even more luck, the part of him that was still Eric had left it there for me to find.
My fear was that I wouldnt find it and that Father Corletti wouldnt find it.
My fear was that the page was gone for good, the binding spell lost to the sands of time.
And without that spell, then there was no way to bind Odayne. No way, at least, that I knew of. Though I had to admit that my knowledge of binding demons was limited. I was much more of a kill them and be done with it kind of girl.
And, of course, binding Odayne wasnt my only problem. The truth was that Lilith was as big a problem as Odayne, if not bigger. Odayne was simply more personal because hed moved into my husband. But Lilith was not the kind of demon I needed gunning for me and my family, and if I did manage to stop Odayne, I was going to have to deal with her wrath, and that would really, really, really not be pretty.
Too bad there wasnt some way to bind her. Some sort of two-for-one special would be good, actually. Something. Anything.
But nothing brilliant jumped to mind, most probably because this really wasnt my turf. For that matter, until this whole mess with Eric, the only bound demon Id ever really had to deal with was Andramelech, trapped inside Solomons Stone. Then again, I corrected myself, that had to do with Eric, too. Hed trapped the demon, after all, unknowingly sacrificing himself in the process, his soul getting sucked out of his body even at the instant the demon was sucked into the stone.
Wait.
I played that back in my head, my eyes narrowing as I thought about what I knew about Solomons Stone. It could be used to trap a demon. All the person doing the trapping had to do was jam their fingerthe one wearing the ringinto the eye of the demon. But the person trapping it had to be willing to make the ultimate sacrificetheir soul sucked out and up into the ether.
What would happen if Eric wore the stone and jammed his finger into Liliths eye?
Suddenly excited, I dialed my house, then waited impatiently until Stuart put Eddie on the line.
Sounds like a damn fine plan for trapping her, but it makes Eric your scapegoat. Hes gonna get stuck back in the dead zone.
What if we combine the attack on Lilith with an unbinding ceremony? Then wouldnt Eric stay and Odayne be sucked out?
Dont know, Eddie said. Dont really know.
Can we research it? I mean, its an idea, right? And its a way to get rid of Lilith. Shes dangerous, Eddie. And shes never going to give up. Shes going to go after my family.
Ill call Rome, he said. Ill get the stone here. At the very least, he said, its a weapon. And we need all the weapons we can get.
I hung up feeling slightly ill, because I couldnt imagine sacrificing Eric back to the ether. If we could find an unbinding ritual, then maybe it wouldnt come to that, but I had to confess that I was losing hope. My options seemed to be closing in around me, and my goal of saving Eric was beginning to waver against the bigger goal of keeping my children safe and alive.
I hated having the choice thrust upon me, but I also knew which way I was going to choose. For my children.
Always, always for my children.
I drew in a breath as I turned on Erics street and prayed that it wouldnt come to that. I wanted to unwrap Eric from Odayne and fight side by side with him to nail Lilith and her demon lover. And all I could do was hope that Eric was still enough inside Davids body that he could help me make that wish come true.
It was perhaps a foolish wish, but I couldnt get it out of my mind. No matter how many secrets hed kept from me, I knew that one thing was trueEric loved me. And if there was any wayany way at allfor him to help me on this quest to save him, I knew damn well that he would find that way.
I found a spot right in front and pulled in, then raced up the stairs to his apartment. I pounded on the door, got no answer, and tried the knob. It turned easily, and I pushed the door open.
Then I froze.
The scene before me reeked of déjŕ vu. Nadia on Erics lap in the chair nearest the door. Erics hands on her, his eyes blind with passion.
The last time Id walked in on such a scene, Eric had been mortified. This time, I dont think he even noticed me as Nadia impaled herself over and over and over on him, her fingernails digging into his shoulders.
I should have looked awayI wanted to look awaybut somehow I couldnt. And because of that, the smug smile on Nadias face when she turned to look at me hurt that much more.
We have company, darling, she said, pushing Eric back as he bent forward to suckle at her naked breast. His head turned slowly, and I saw his eyes widen as he looked at me. I saw more, too. I saw recognition. I saw Eric.
No. That wasnt him. That wasnt the man I loved. It was Odayne and only Odayne, and with my chin high, I took a step inside the room. Odayne, I said. He wont let you stay, you know. Erics a fighter. More than that, hes a winner.
At that, the body I knew as Eric only laughed. What makes you think he hasnt already won? I am victory. We, he said, in that painfully familiar voice. We are victory.
He rose then, his back displayed to me, and I saw the bulging, horrible scar on his back. The serpent, and it seemed to be staring right at me.
I shook my head and, unable to bear it any longer, shifted my gaze to Nadia. Im going to kill you, I said, slowly and softly. Im going to take you out, watch you die, and then Im going to dance on your hollow, lifeless body.
Temper, temper, she said. And dont even think about it. We are very strong. And if we choose to, we will crush you like a bug.
We, I repeated. You and Lilith.
What a good little student you are. Of course. We are one now.
Not completely, I said. Not yet.
Do you think you can stop us? You cannot. We are strong. We are timeless. And we are ever so patient.
Youre evil and youre vile, and Im going to end you.
How?
I stayed silent, and she laughed, the sound surprisingly girlish. You enjoy your heroic fantasies, darling. The rest of us will live in reality.
I took another step closer, my fists clenched tight at my sides.
Ah, ah, she said, and suddenly there was a knife in her hand, its tip pressing into the flesh over Erics heart. I froze. Eric, I noticed, smiled.
You wont kill him, I said. You want him too much.
Clever girl, she said. But killing him wont send my darling away. Not this time. Hes twined enough inside the body now. Not fully. Not yet. But close. With her free hand, she stroked his cheek, the gesture so gentle, so loving, it made me sick. Kill the flesh and the demon will still live, here, inside this body.
And Eric? I asked, hating myself for asking, and fearing that I already knew the answer.
This time, Erics head turned to look at me. He will be with us, of course. He is always with us.
It makes the human in me happy, Nadiaor, rather, Lilithsaid. She likes him, you see. And I think you already know that he likes her. Likes her very, very much I believe.
I couldnt stay. Couldnt watch the two of them anymore, couldnt listen to the horrible things Lilith was saying. Or that Odayne was saying through Erics mouth.
And as much as I wanted to, I knew I couldnt take them on. Not and survive.
And if I didnt survive, then neither would my family.
I turned away, my back to them before either could see the tears, and pulled the door open. I hurried out, Nadias laughter echoing after me.
Id hoped to get away. To at least get into the car before the tears came, but my control wasnt cooperating, and I stumbled down the steps with tears streaming down my face. I cried for Eric, trapped in a body he didnt want to be in. And I cried for myself, unable to erase the picture of my beloved Eric with another woman, even though I knew it wasnt really Eric at all.
I cried because I wanted to save him and I had no idea how.
And I cried because I was tired. I was so damn tired.
Youre a fool, Nadia said, and I whipped around to find her behind me, now wearing one of Erics shirts and nothing else.
Careful, I said. Youll catch cold.
Stay away from me, Kate. Dont get ideas. Dont think you can play the hero and win this round. Youve won too many times, darling. Youve used up your quota. She leaned in close, her face only inches from mine. Its my turn, sweetheart. Its my turn to win.
I tried to think of a snappy comeback, honestly I did, but my mind wasnt sharp enough. My reflexes were a hell of a lot sharper, and I kicked up with my knee at the same time I smashed forward with my head. I caught her hard in the crotch at the same time I smashed her nose. A second later, I had her by the shoulders and sent her tumbling down so that her bare ass skidded hard on the rough concrete sidewalk.
Her face curved with fury, and she stood, eyes black now, the whites totally gone.
I stepped back, realizing Id crossed a line. Realizing for the first time that Lilith was no ordinary demon and that Id just fucked up, but good.
You wont kill me, I said, praying that Eddie was right. You cant kill me.
The hell I cant, she said, her voice seeming to reverberate throughout me. But you are right. I wont. Do you know why?
Something squeezed at my throat, and I realized it was her hand. I blinked, not at all sure how shed moved that fast. My body was icy with fear, but I fought it. Told myself to steady. I wasnt dying today. Not now.
A small comfort considering there were lots of ways to hurt me. Lots of ways to make me beg for death. And lots of ways to punish me without ever giving me that sweet release.
Do. You. Know. Why? she repeated.
I die, he dies, I said, working hard to speak with my throat held so tight. And all this work is for nothing. Theyre both gone. Back to the ether. And your precious Odayne will have to start all over again in some other body.
Her brows lifted. Arent you the clever one? But youre wrong. So very wrong.
The hell I am.
Something like that, she said with a smile. The truth is that if you die, Eric dies. Eric dies, but Odayne stays, warm and cozy in that body I like so much.
I swallowed, trying to process what she was telling me. Because what she was sayingwhat I was hearingwas that my death was the unbinding spell Id been looking for.
Thats right, Nadia said, apparently reading my thoughts. Odayne is within the flesh now, and there he will remain.
You lie, I said. If that were true, youd be trying to kill me right now. Yet even as I spoke the words, I knew that she was telling the truth. And I also knew why she wouldnt kill mewhy she wouldnt release Erics soul from Odayne. It was for the reason Allie saidLilith wanted that brush with humanity, and she wanted her lover to have a bit of humanity as well.
You understand, she said. I see it in your eyes. I want my beloved back. Is that so hard for you to understand, Katie-kins? Is it so hard for you to see how we are alike? You should be supporting me, not hunting me. For that matter, she said, with a flick of her wrist, you should be down on your knees worshipping me.
And then I was. Shed tossed me down like so much garbage and the hand that had been on my throat was now on the top of my head, grasping my hair, tilting my head back so that I had no choice but to look at her.
I have her in me now, the Hunter who vexes you so. Her humanity flows in this body that I now fill. We are not yet one, but we will be soon enough, and when that happens I will be open to all the pleasures of your world. I will wish to share them with my beloved. And for that, he must feel the sting of humanity, too. For that, he needs his counterpart. The human soul with which he has been twined lo these many years.
It was an empty threat, then, I said. Inside. When you threatened Eric with the knife.
She laughed then, and her hand shook as it did, jerking at my hair and making me wince. Not at all. Kill the flesh, and the soul lives inside. Once Odayne is fully bound to the flesh, the death of Erics body will not break the bind between them.
I licked my lips, my mind racing. I had no reason to doubt what she said, but at the same time, she hadnt shoved the knife into Erics heart. There could only be one reason why she held back, and that was that Odayne still wasnt yet fully bound in the flesh. He was emerging, but the game wasnt over yet. Which meantor at least I hoped it meantthat there was still time to save Eric.
But killing me is different than killing the body, I said. The Lazarus Bones tied my soul to Erics. Kill me, and you free Erics soul. And your lover loses his grip on humanity. I managed a smile. Quite the conundrum, Im sure. It must really irk you not to be able to kill me.
Not at all. Im a patient woman, after all. After so many millennia, patience comes quite easily to me. And once Odayne and Eric are fully bound, the ties between you and your husband will be broken. He will no longer be yours; he will be fully mine. And once that happens, dearest, I assure you that I will kill you without hesitation.
Hes fighting it, I said. I dont care what show you put on for me in there. Erics fighting it.
Yes, she said. He is. But that hardly matters. Hes losing the battle. Hes tiring. Hes weakening. And even if he werent, Im unwilling to take chances.
Youre going to do something, I said, thinking of all those ceremonies Eddie was talking about. Something to fuse Odayne and Eric.
Clever girl. I merely intend to hurry the process along.
How? When?
Such curiosity! But it doesnt matter. Theres nothing you can do to stop it. And once its done, I promise Ill put you out of your misery. You can thank me for that later.
Youll never touch me, I said, but considering she had me by the hair, Im certain my words lacked their full impact.
Oh, I assure you I will. And in the meantime, dearest, I may not be able to kill you, but I know how to hurt you. You, and those you love.
And with that, she hauled back with her free hand. Lightning fast, her fist flew at me, and with her other hand holding my head in place, there was nowhere to go. I screamed when she made contact, the world turning red, then gray, then black.
And as my head hit the pavement, I was vaguely aware that she was gone.
And after that, all was black.
Fifteen
The light tap at my bedroom door startled me, and I lifted my head from the pillow, my fingers still stroking Timmys hair. Id been lying there for an hour, my little boy asleep beside me, and Id been watching him. Just watching. And trying hard not to think.
Hey, Allie said, poking her head inside. Daddy called.
That got me moving, and I sat up, angering the headache that was pounding against my eyes. I dont know how long Id lain unconscious and sprawled out on the sidewalk in front of Erics apartment, but it was long enough to make my muscles stiff. Id gone home and moved straight for the bedroom, taking Timmy with me, only giving Stuart the barest overview of what had happened as he taped up my broken nose.
What did he say? I asked, and saw Allie wince at the nasal quality of my voice.
She came over slowly and sat on the edge of the bed, careful not to wake her sleeping brother. He said to tell you he was sorry, she said, and I felt the tears start to well. And that you shouldnt give up on him because hes going to beat this. He says he doesnt know what happened. That it was important for me to tell you that he doesnt remember any of it. That it was Odayne, and he was inside, but he was lost and he couldnt get out.
But hes out now.
She nodded, her own eyes brimming. And he said that he loved me. And that I was supposed to tell you that he loves you, too. She drew in a deep breath. Mom, what happened?
I shook my head. Never was I going to tell her that truth. The demon, I said simply. The demon is taking over, and Lilith is right there moving it along.
And Nadia?
As far as Im concerned, theyre one and the same.
She licked her lips. Can we really stop her? I mean, shes, like, hugely powerful.
We have to, I said, refusing to harbor any doubts. Its the only hope your dad has. Stop Lilith, and he can fight Odayne. Buy some time. But if we cant stop her, shes going to do the binding ceremony, and Eric really will be lost. I reached over and squeezed her hand. I need to talk to Stuart and Eddie, okay? Dont you have some research to do?
Tons, she said. Does that mean I dont have to worry about homework?
No school for you tomorrow, I said. Or Friday.
Next week?
This will be over by next week, I said firmly. One way or another, its going to be finished.
She stood up and moved to the door, then paused and looked back at me. I called everyone and canceled my party.
Allie! It was, of course, the right thing to do. Ill confess, though, that I was amazed that shed done it.
Theyre trying to hurt you through us. I figured they wouldnt hesitate to go after a bunch of my friends. Slaughter a bunch of innocent teenagers, and She broke off with a shrug. Well, you know.
Youre absolutely right, I said, coming to a decision. And youre still having the party.
She frowned. Are you nuts?
Not with your friends. But with us. The family. Laura. Mindy. I tried to smile, but stopped when it made my nose hurt. You deserve it, and we wont be in any more danger in the theater than at home. And though I didnt say it, the truth was that we were probably in less danger. After all, home had a multitude of windows and doors whereas the theater had only the main entrance and one fire exit. And if nothing else, it was another evening during which I would know everybodys exact location.
You really mean it?
Absolutely, I said. Well bring extra holy water, stock away a few weapons, and pray, I said. Itll be smaller than we planned, but itll still be a party.
Yes. She made a pumping motion with her fist, then flashed me the kind of grin that assured me Id made the right decision. And, Mom? Sorry about your nose.
My fingers automatically rose to brush my battered nose, and I winced. Thats okay, I said. I was getting tired of seeing the same reflection every time I looked in the mirror. Stuart and Eddie, I reminded her. Can you get them for me now?
Right.
She scooted out, and a few moments later my husband and Eddie trundled in. Stuart immediately came to the bed and put his arm around me. Eddie paced, hands shoved deep into his pockets.
The stones supposed to arrive on Friday. I talked to Father Corletti this morning.
So thats the plan, then, I said. We get the stone, we corner Lilith, and we hope for the best.
How are we going to corner Lilith? Stuart asked.
Eric, I said. We use him as bait. I looked up, met my husbands eyes. She loves him, you see. We get him awaymake her think hes in dangerand shell come. Shell come, and well be ready.
That she-bitch is wicked strong, Eddie said.
Sos the stone. It held Andramelech. Itll hold her. I spoke firmly, but I couldnt help the way my confidence wavered. Wont it?
Eddie drew in a breath, then nodded. I think so. So long as we can get through the ceremony before she rips the skin from our bones. And so long as Erics willing to jam his finger into the queen bitchs eye. So, yeah. Except for those few minor points, then yeah. I think itll work.
I swallowed. Good, I said, with more confidence than I felt. The truth was, I didnt feel much at all except numb. Id taken a beating, both emotionally and physically. And what I wanted right then more than anything was for this all to be over. What about the book? I asked.
Gone missing from the Vatican library, Eddie said. Last time anyone saw it was right around the time Eric went back to Rome to work through some of his issues.
Shit, I said, and heard both Eddie and Stuart grunt in agreement. I looked from one to the other, and my feeling of being at loose ends dissipated. No matter what, I wasnt alone in this. Thank you both, I said.
For what? Stuart asked, while Eddie harumphed and turned a bright shade of pink.
For helping. For understanding. I dont know, I said, suddenly flustered. Just for being there.
Stuart sighed and took both my hands in his. I dont know Eric. Not really. And what I know, I dont much like. No, dont say anything, he added, when I started to protest. Its jealousy, and I know that. But I dont have to like the guy to know that I would never, ever wish whats happening to him on anyone. Worst enemy or my wifes first husband. I love you, Kate, and you love him. So theres no question. Of course Ill help.
Thank you, I said, then shot a sad smile toward Eddie. Are we pretty sure that itll be Odayne whos sucked into the ether?
He shook his head. Mildly sure. But it could be Eric. Or it could be both of them. As far as we know its never been done before, but if we do the ceremony in the safe room, then the demon is going to want to leaveits gonna want to get the hell out of there, no pun intended. And Father Corletti agrees that thatll increase our odds. He shrugged. Its the best we can do. Its a risk, though. For all of us, and mostly for Eric. You willing to take that risk, girl?
I nodded. I dont think we have a choice. I took Stuarts hand and tugged him down next to me on the bed. I need to talk to Stuart for a minute, okay?
Youre doing good, girl, Eddie said, looking me hard in the eyes. Damn good.
I managed a smile, then cringed because the movement hurt my nose. He chuckled, then headed out of the room.
Theres another way, I told Stuart as soon as Eddie was gone. If we screw up and cant bind Lilith and she gets the ceremony started to twine Odayne and Eric together, theres still one way left that can save Erics soul. I licked my lips, hating what I was about to say. If I die, Eric not only dies, but his soul goes free. Lilith pretty much admitted that little loophole.
Wait, wait, wait. He stared at me as if Id gone insane. There is no way youre
No, I agreed. Im not. I cant. I pressed my palm against his cheek. I wont do it. But I looked away then, tears filling my eyes. I feel so guilty. Theres a solution. A way to save a mans soul. A man I love, and Stuart, I really do love him. Its right there, and I can reach out and touch it. But I cant take it. I cant.
Of course you cant, Stuart said, holding me close as I clung to him. You cant, he repeated. And Eric wouldnt want you to.
About that, though, I wasnt so sure. Because thered been a time in my life when I would have willingly gone into the abyss to save Erics soul, and when I was certain he would have done the same to save mine.
But I wasnt that girl anymore, and my future now lay with the man who now held me in his arms, gently stroking my hair.
I would try to save Eric, yes. But I wasnt going to sacrifice my life or my family to do it.
Federal Express delivered the ring with Solomons Stone Thursday morning with advertised swiftness. All good and well, but the stone was useless to us without both Eric and Lilith.
So whats the plan? Allie asked, bouncing Timmy on her lap and popping dry Lucky Charms into her mouth. Im only eating these cause I need the sugar for energy. Next week, Im totally going back to Kashi.
Mellow! Timmy said, picking out a green marshmallow. Wanna eat mellows!
Get your own bowl, twerp, Allie said, but she reached across the table to fill her own bowl up higher to share.
Dont feed him that, I said automatically, but the odds of me pursuing that particular point were slim. My mind was too occupied with other things to worry about basic childhood nutrition. Since Im not going to be with you, I want all of you to stay at the mansion today, I said. For that matter, I want you in the safe room. Laura and Mindy and Cutter, too, I added, picking up the phone to call Lauras house.
She answered on the first ring, and I told her what I wanted. Hang on a sec, she said, then came back to the phone not two minutes later. Well meet you there, she said, and I couldnt help but smile.
Tell Cutter I said good morning.
We were just going over some figures for the studio, she said, but I could hear the smile in her voice.
Ive got work, Stuart said, then he caught the expression on my face. Fortunately, Ive already put a wireless router in the mansion. Ill have one of the paralegals e-mail me the agreements to review.
Ritall keep, Eddie said. Hate to break our first date, but sometimes allowances gotta be made.
I collapsed into an empty chair nursing my cup of coffee. I love you guys. We pull this off, and Liliths history.
Allie looked at me, her blue eyes wide and innocent. Yeah, she said. And theres a good chance that Daddys history, too.
I held out my hand, and she took it, squeezing hard. I hoped that only Odayne would be thrust into the ether when Lilith was bound in the ring, but I couldnt guarantee it.
Hes smart, your daddy, Eddie said. And he loves you. Hell find his way back. He did it once before.
He had help then, she said. He got to piggyback on the demon.
It is done, though, I said. Father Corletti said so. Not often, but its done. If anyone can do it, your father can.
Hell be someone else. He might be in China or Russia or the South of France. And he could be in the ether for decades. Times different there, right?
But hell be back, I said more firmly. Back and without a demon. His soul his own. I swallowed, my throat suddenly tight with second thoughts, even though I knew this was for the best. More than thatit was perfect. The only clean solution. Or as clean as it could be considering we had to get Eric to cooperate and Lilith in the trap.
When I thought about it that way, the solution wasnt so perfect. On the contrary, I had to wonder if we were screwed.
Theres no other solution, I said, as much to them as to myself. I pushed back from the table, unable to sit still. We need to get going.
Allie and Stuart exchanged glances, but didnt argue. They both headed out of the kitchen to gather their stuff, Allie passing Timmy off to me on the way.
I plopped him on the counter and peeled a banana, trading bites with him as we waited.
You dont have anything you want to take? I asked Eddie.
He patted the pocket of the oversized shirt he was wearing. Ian Fleming. Seeing as Im working in the intelligence trade now, I figure I gotta know the literature.
I laughed. Couldnt argue with that.
We aint gonna live like this forever, girl.
This works the way I want it to, and we wont have to.
We took the van, figuring if they needed to leave for some reasonand I warned them that theyd better notthey could take Lauras car. In fact, Laura and crew were waiting for us when we got there, not having had to waste time gathering toddler toys the way I had, remembering at the last minute that there was no way Timmy was going to last in an empty house without a variety of amusing distractions.
At the mansion, I waited until they were tucked away inside the safe room, and then I kissed my family good-bye and promised to be back soon.
Be careful, Mom, Allie said. They cant kill you, but . . . She trailed off, as if saying it would make it come true.
I brushed my fingertips lightly over my bruised and swollen nose. I know, I said, and then I left the family I loved to go try to save a man I loved.
Sixteen
I couldnt find him. I went all over San Diablo, checking the fancy hotels and the dives, Erics apartment, and Nadias old digs.
I walked the beach. I roamed the parks. And I found no sign of him.
When I got back to the mansion, I found my family and friends camped out in the safe room.
Stay or go? Stuart asked.
Home, I said.
Allie frowned. Do you think thats okay?
I nodded. I couldnt be certain, of course, but instinct told me that Nadia would want to keep herself and Eric as far away from me and mine as possible until after shed bound herself to Lilith and until after Odayne was bound to Eric. Any other scenario, and Eric might try to break free, might fight her and help me.
Which at least explained why Id had no luck in that department. But the tiny bit of good news was thatassuming I was rightwe were all safe for the night.
I told everyone my thoughts, and they agreed. Damn good reasoning, Eddie said. Course Liliths a crazy bitch and you cant predict crazy, but Id say the odds are in our favor.
Not a completely rousing endorsement, but it was good enough, and we piled back in our cars and headed home. Id asked Cutter and Laura to stay at our house, but Laura had declined. Cutter, however, promised to stick close by. And that, I figured, was something.
Timmy was asleep by the time we got home, and I tucked him gently in bed, with Stuart looking over my shoulder. Allie needs you, he said. And then I need you, too.
I kissed him hard and long. A promise, I said. Ill see you in a few.
He pressed a soft kiss to my nose, and I headed down the hall for Allies room, where I found her already curled up in bed.
Hey, I said, climbing in beside her and pulling her close. You okay?
Hes in there, Mom, she said, her voice barely a whisper. Hes in there and hes fighting, and we have to find him and get him out. Promise me. Promise me this is going to work.
I drew in a noisy breath. You know I cant promise that, baby.
Do it anyway.
I felt the ring in my pocket press into my hip. The stone that was going to solve our problems. The panacea that was going to make Lilith go away. I promise, I said, and I damn sure hoped I wouldnt have to break it.
Sleep here with me tonight?
I thought of Stuart alone in our bed, and knew that he would understand. Absolutely, I said, and held her tight. The last time shed snuggled in my bed, shed been nine, and wed just learned that her father had been murdered. Shed slept with me for three solid months, and then shed announced one day that she was doing okay, and that she needed to be a big girl and go back to her own bed. She hadnt backpedaled. Not once.
Id been proud of her then for knowing it was time to grow up.
And I was proud of her now for being grown up enough to ask me to be there for her.
Were going to stop Lilith and were going to free your father.
I know you are, she said. I love you, Mom.
I love you, too, baby, I said, and then I fell asleep with wisps of tears on my eyes.
Friday arrived as an oasis of sanity in a week gone mad. Id fallen down on the job with regard to Allies party preparations, and that meant that today I wasnt going to worry about Erics whereabouts or fear an imminent attack from Lilith or Nadia or whoever the hell she was today. Instead, I was going to run around to grocery stores and party-supply stores. I was going to buy fancy little cupcakes. And I was going to desperately, frantically wonder what on earth the mother of the fifteen-year-old birthday girl was supposed to wear to a party.
Because even without all her friends thereeven without her father as part of the crowdI still wanted to make this the best birthday possible for Allie. I wanted, at least a little, to live inside the illusion that not only would everything be okay, but that it was already fine and dandy.
Foolish, I know, but for a few hours I needed the foolishness. Honestly, I think we all did.
Before all of that, however, I had to see the birthday girl herself, and so I tiptoed into her room with a wrapped package under my arm and a toasted bagel in my hand, a single candle stuck atop a schmear of cream cheese. Despite the fact that my wide and varied talents do not include singing, I belted out Happy Birthday, causing my normally groggy-in-the-morning daughter to sit bolt upright, a smile wide across her face.
Hey, she said. Im fifteen.
I know, I said. I was there when you were born.
She smirked and held out her hand for the bagel. Do I get to make a wish?
Absolutely, I said, and although she didnt tell me what she wished for, I knew. I was wishing for the same thing, even without flaming breakfast products.
So, she said casually, after taking a bite from her birthday bagel. Is that for me?
I pulled the package out from under my arm and looked at it, feigning surprise. Huh. Now where on earth did that come from?
Gimme! she squealed, and bounced on the bed in pretty much the same manner as when she was six.
Stuart and I got you some more presents that you can open tonight at the party, I said. But this ones from me.
Yeah? She hefted the box, which Id wrapped in the Sunday comics since I could find no wrapping paper in our house. About fourteen inches long and five inches wide with a depth of about two inches. And she was examining every bit of it. Hmmm, she said, pressing her ear close and shaking it. A dagger, she said smugly. I knew it.
Allie, I said, with a shake of my head. You wont know for sure until you open it.
Good point, she said, and ripped into the paper with a laugh. In seconds, she was down to the box, which she sat on her lap as she tugged the lid off. I fought a smile as she looked at the beautiful necklace with the silver pendant. The one Id bought at the jewelry store near Eddies spy shop. Oh, wow, she whispered. And though I knew she was expecting a different present and was desperately hiding her disappointment, she drew it out and hooked it around her neck. Its amazing. Thanks.
Youre welcome, I said, still trying not to smile. I thought the colors would coordinate nicely with the leather of the sheath.
Oh, she said, confused. Then her eyes narrowed and she peered up at me. Sheath?
I shrugged and nodded toward the box. With a scowl, she lifted it, her face lighting up as she realized that the weight was a bit more significant than an empty box would be. She tugged out the paper on which the necklace had rested and revealed a pearl-handled steel dagger tucked into a rich, brown leather sheath.
Wow, she said, taking it out and stroking a finger reverentially over the finely crafted handle. Really? For me?
Got your initials and everything, I said, motioning for her to turn it over. There, engraved on the blade, were the initials AECAlison Elizabeth Crowe. Its yours, baby. You earned it.
She caught me in a huge bear hug and, thankfully, had enough presence of mind to leave the knife on the bed when she did so. This is awesome, Mom. And this is going to be the best birthday ever.
I smiled and hugged her back, but I saw the shadow in her eyes. Not quite the best birthday, I thought. But for today, at least, maybe we could all pretend.
Actually, it turned out that pretending wasnt really required. The day passed so swiftly with preparationsand so safely without signs of brooding or attacking demonsthat none of us thought of much other than getting everything ready at the theater. We really dont have to go all out, she said, over and over. I told everyone Im sick, remember? That the partys off. So its not like we have to fix the place up still.
Actually, we do, I said firmly, and when I saw the smile bloom on her face, I knew that Id saidand donethe right thing.
The day passed in such a demon-free haze that after a few hours I couldnt help but second-guess Allies decision to disinvite her friends from the party. Certainly, it was shaping up to be a demon-free night.
More than that, though, the lack of activity on the demon-front was starting to make me nervous.
After all, if Lilith was busy harassing me, that meant they didnt have time to plan for this massive binding spell. But she wasnt harassing. She wasnt even watching from afar and sneering creepily. She simply wasnt there.
And neither was Eric.
And, yeah, I was worried. Because how did I know she hadnt already performed whatever ceremony she intended to perform? A ceremony to speed up the bond between Eric and Odayne; a ceremony about which I still knew no details despite days of searching.
Theres nothing you can do, Stuart said as he held up the end of a Happy Birthday banner. But if it helps, I dont think its over. I think we still have a chance to save him.
Why? I asked, needing to hear reason and not merely hope.
Because if it were over, Lilith wouldnt stay away. Shed come to gloat. And, he added, his eyes flat and hard, shed come to kill.
Despite that cheery prospect, Stuarts analysis made me feel better, and I finished the party preparations in a reasonably good mood, my Eric/Lilith problems tucked as far away in my mind as possible.
We finished fifteen minutes before Laura arrived with Mindy and Cutter. I let them into the concession area through the ornate front door, and was about to lock up again when Eddie arrived with Rita on his arm. I drew in a worried breath and shot him a fierce look over Allies head, but he just shrugged without looking the slightest bit remorseful or worried about bringing another person into the fold.
This looks so totally awesome, Aunt Kate, Mindy said, looking around at the lobby decorated with streamers, Happy Birthday banners, and well over fifty helium balloons. Wed inflated another ten with old-fashioned lung-power, and Timmy was busy racing around, bopping the balloons with his fists and head as he tried to keep them airborne.
What? No praise for your mother? countered Laura, and I had to laugh. Shed finished the posters documenting Allies fifteen years on the planet, and they filled each of the ten display cases, four inside the theater, and six outside surrounding the ticket office.
Mom, Mindy said, with an eye roll I was sure shed learned from my daughter.
As she and Allie wandered the room, looking at all the posters, Rita shuffled up to them, then thrust a present into Allies hand. Nice girl like you, I heard her say, gotta have one of these. Aint no two ways about it. And though I couldnt see what was in the box, I did hear Allies delighted laugh after she opened it. She hugged Rita, then tucked something black and squarish into her back pocket before following up with a second hug.
I cast a glance toward Eddie, but he only shrugged.
Across the room, Mindy had grabbed Allies hand. The posters are a blast, but did you see the marquee? I mean, how awesome is that? You got a picture of it, right?
Marquee? Allie turned to look at me, and I realized that she hadnt yet seen it. Wed come in through the fire door off the alley in the back.
Come on, I said, leading everyone out through the glass front doors. We gathered near the old-fashioned ticket booth and looked up at the marquee that protruded out over the sidewalk. The sun had set, the only illumination now from the streetlights and the white glow of the backlighting on the marquee, highlighting the words wed ordered for the occasion: Happy Birthday, Allie! Congrats on Fifteen Fabulous Years!
Oh, wow! she squealed. Thats so cool. Thats so totally awesome. She flung her arms around me, then around Stuart, who hugged her back enthusiastically. Can we get a picture? Can you fit me and the sign in? she asked, jogging over to stand beneath it.
Sure, I said, lifting my camera to my eye. But when I looked through the viewfinder, Allie wasnt smiling in my direction. Instead, she was looking across the street, her expression somehow both wistful and scared. Allie?
Her eyes darted toward me, then back across the street. I turned and saw nothing at first. Then a truck that had been blocking my line of sight moved, and I saw Eric standing there.
Daddy? The pain in Allies voice coupled with the raw longing seemed to grab me by the heart and squeeze.
He kept his eyes on her, moving slowly into the street, ignoring the horns and curses from drivers who had to slam on their brakes to avoid hitting him.
Eric! I called. What are you doing?
He didnt look at me, but he did lift his hands, as if in surrender. But rather than reassure me, the gesture made my blood run cold.
I think he must have realized the move was a misstep, too, because a split second later he burst into a run, practically launching himself from street to sidewalk. And Allie, so desperate to have her father back, stayed put one second too long, so that when she finally did turn away and start to run back toward me, his fingers were close enough to reach, and his hand closed around the back of her shirt and pulled her, kicking and screaming, close to him.
Around me, pandemonium broke out, but it seemed like white noise to me. Everything was happening in slow motion. Id lunged forward when Eric was still in the street, and so I was close to them now, the blade Id kept in my back pocket already in my hand.
Eric was ready for me, though, and he grabbed Allie around the waist, then used her as a human shield, twisting her so that the force of her legs thrust out in front of her caught me across the waist, knocking me to the ground, and sending my blade flying.
No! Allie screamed.
Behind me, everyone rushed forward, then stopped when Eric yanked Allies new dagger from the sheath at her waist and thrust the tip against her jugular. I wish to spend time with my daughter on her birthday, he said, in a voice far removed from Erics. I very much suggest you dont make a move for your fallen knife.
On the street, cars honked and people stared, and I was certain it was only a matter of time before someone called 911 and the police came. Fine with me, actually. Right then, I was happy for any distraction I could get.
Eric, no! I called, but he only smiled at me.
Names are important, Katie. If you wish to speak to me, call me by my proper name.
I am, I said, calculating whether I could take another step forward.
He grabbed her tighter. Allie yelped, and I froze in place. My name is Odayne, he said. Say it. Say it.
Odayne, I whispered, then felt the slow trickle of a tear sliding down my face.
Excellent. He leaned down to speak closer to Allies ear, still loud enough that I could hear him. Now you be a good girl and come spend time with Daddy, he said. He took a step backward, and I could see that the pressure of the knife against her neck had loosened. He had her walking backward, and Allie kept her eyes frozen on me, just as I kept mine on her. Behind me, my friends and family might as well have evaporated. Right then, my whole world centered on my daughter. On saving her.
Too bad I didnt have a clue how to do that.
They took another step backward, and I could see the fear on Allies face. She stumbled, reaching out for her father for balance, then jerking her arm away quickly as if realizing who shed reached for. I heard him chuckle, as if he realized, too.
And then I saw something else. I saw Allie, quick as lightning, thrust her hand into her back pocket, as if shed planned the move all along, as if shed stumbled on purpose. Even as she did, I heard Ritas sharp intake of breath behind me, and before I even had time to process that oddity, Allies hand was back out, and the black box Rita had given her was tight in her hand, and it was pressed against Erics body, and he was shaking, screaming, his eyes wide with pain.
Taser, Rita breathed even as Stuart called out for me to catch.
I turned just in time to grab the knife hed sent flying. I snatched it out of the air, positioned it in my hand, and as my daughter dived sideways and down to the ground, I sent the blade hurtling through the air toward Eric, then raced forward toward my daughter.
He dodged the knife, but it still struck him, slicing deep into his upper arm.
His yowl of pain echoed around us, and for a moment, I feared he would go after Allie again. Wed reached each other, though, and now I thrust her behind me, then stood facing Eric.
A split second of indecision crossed his face, and then he raced once again into the street. I hesitated, and then broke into a run after him, snatching my fallen knife as I went.
I didnt catch him.
A delivery truck in the road slowed me down, and by the time I reached the opposite sidewalk, hed slipped between two buildings. I followed to the alley, but he was gone. I could search for him, I knew, but I abandoned that plan quick enough, certain that the more prudent option was to go back to my family. To stay with them and keep them safe and whole.
By the time I got back, a uniformed officer was on the scene, summoned apparently by a passerby whod seen Eric with the knife to Allies throat.
We told him what had happened, leaving out the demon parts, of course. And also leaving out Erics identity. The story, as relayed by us, centered on an attack by an unknown man on a fifteen-year-old girl who, thankfully, had a Taser handy. My knife-throwing skills didnt come up, and the officer had no evidence of any blade other than the one the Good Samaritan had reported at Allies throat.
Although the officer urged us to make a formal report, we begged off, assuring him that Allie was fine, that the encounter was nothing more nefarious than your average mugging, and that the best thing for Allie was to get her mind off the mugging by returning to her birthday celebration.
Back in the theater, I locked the door behind us, sagged against the glass, and let the tears Id been holding back flow.
Turn it off, girlie, Eddie said, even as Stuart held me close. You gotta turn it off if youre gonna fight him.
I lifted my head and met Eddies eyes. He was right, of course, but what he advocated was easier said than done.
As I pulled away from Stuart, nodding reassurance when his brows rose in question, the ringing of Allies phone shattered our uncomfortable silence.
She answered, and I could tell from her expression who was on the other end of the line.
She listened, her mouth open a little, and by the time I reached her side, she had ended the call, having not spoken one single word.
With eyes brimming with tears, she looked up at me. Daddy, she said. Not Odayne. That was really Daddy.
My heart fluttered in my chest. What did he say?
That he was sorry. That . . . That I should try to have a happy birthday. And, she added, her breath hitching as she fought sobs, that I should remember that he loves me, and he always has. Her eyes met mine. When he hung up, he said good-bye. And I think it was more than just hanging up the phone, you know? But he was back. Really back. Hed gotten free. Somehow hed gotten loose long enough to call me. Only now . . . now, Im scared.
I understood the sentiment; I was scared, too.
Can you go? she asked. Can you go get him now? Now, before Odayne comes back?
Beside me, Stuart took Allies hand. Im not sure thats such a good idea.
They wont kill you, she said. Youre the only one who can get him.
If shes right, Eddie said, and hes gotten free of Odayne, nows the time. Maybe the last chance, too. If Odayne keeps taking over, were gonna lose the chance to get that ring on Erics finger. And if we lose that chance, then there aint no way of stopping Lilith.
We dont have a way to unbind him, I said. If Odayne goes into the ether, Eric goes with him.
Please, Allie said. I know Daddy. And hed rather be incorporeal with a demon than alive on Earth with us dead.
The truth of her words cut through me, and I nodded, knowing that she was right.
Well go stay in the safe room so you dont have to worry about us. But please, please. You have to try.
Stuart squeezed my hand, but whether it was in fear or reassurance, I didnt know. And, I suppose, it didnt matter. Because Allie and Eddie were right. If Eric was Eric, then I had a small window of opportunity to bring him into our plan.
I had no choice.
It was time to ask him to use the ring with Solomons Stone.
It was time to ask him to sacrifice himself in order to save the rest of us.
Odayne.
I wanted to kill him.
I wanted to kill him for putting Allies life in danger. For breaking her heart.
And I wanted to kill him for sneaking into the man that I loved and hiding him away, piece by piece.
I wanted him gone, and the ring that could accomplish that was snug inside my pocket. The ring that could bring an end to this if only I could make all the pieces fit together. Send Odayne back to the ether. Trap Lilith. Destroy everything shed worked for. Destroy everything she loved, if a creature such as her really could love.
And in doing so, Id be condemning Erics soul to be bound to a demon. But there was no other way. The ritual to unbind him from Odayne was lost, ripped from the book by Erics own hand. Or, to be more accurate, by Odayne.
We were, I realized, all out of options.
I moved through the night fueled by hate and, yes, by fear, too. Lives were on the line now. The lives of people I loved. My children. My family.
And somehow, someway, we were going to end this. And soon.
First, I had to find Eric.
He wasnt at his apartment. Fortunately, neither was Nadia, and I counted that as a blessing even as I feared that Odayne had surfaced again and had gone to her.
I told myself not to believe that.
Eric had to be alone because I needed him to be alone, and I refused to accept any other possibility.
So I stalked through his apartment, trying to think where he would go. If Eric had any semblance of control, hed go someplace where I could find him. Someplace he had a connection to. The high school. A hotel wed stayed at. Someplace wed shared. Someplace where hed been only Eric and the demon hadnt yet intruded.
Someplace like the house.
As soon as the thought entered my mind, I knew I was right. Not only was the house standing empty, but I knew it was on his mind. I raced out of his apartment and stumbled blindly to the car, making record time to our old neighborhood. I slammed on the brakes in front of the house, skidding half off the driveway and onto the tidy lawn.
My stomach tightened as I saw that there were no other cars and the house was dark. If he wasnt there, I was seriously screwed, as I was all out of ideas. But once I got to the front door, I knew that I was right. The realtors lockbox had been ripped off the door, and the frame had been busted. The door swung open easily, and I stepped inside, wary.
Eric? I called, but heard only silence in response.
I moved through the house, checking the rooms, feeling more and more despondent as I found each room empty.
I didnt really know despair, though. Not until I got to the bathroom.
Not until I opened the door and found Eric in the bathtub, his slit wrists flowing blood into the inky red water.
No! I cried, and bounded across the room in one gigantic leap. I pulled the drain on the old clawfoot tub and slapped his face, relieved when he blinked at me, then more relieved when I saw his eyes focus. Shit, Eric. Shit, shit, shit.
I wore a denim jacket, and now I used my knife to slice it to ribbons, binding his wrists tight to staunch the flow of blood.
What were you thinking? I shouted, as tears streamed down my face. What the hell could you possibly be thinking?
Without blood, he whispered, the demon will be weak. At least for a while. Time enough for you . . . Time enough for you to fight. And she cant bind me without blood. The ceremony, he said. The ceremony to bind me to Odayne. To speed the process. It requires my blood. Gotta get rid of it. Flush it away. Make it go.
No, I said again. Without blood, you die, you stupid, stupid man.
He was fading on me, and I smacked him hard in the face again, then took him by the shoulders and shook him. Dont you dare die on me, Eric. Dont you dare.
I checked his wrists again, saw that the bleeding had essentially stopped. The water was out of the tub, and he was shivering now in wet clothes.
Wait here, and if you even think about taking those ties off your wrists I will kill you with my bare hands the second I get back. Do you understand me?
He didnt answer, but his lip curved up, just slightly, as I stood and raced from the room back to the car. I grabbed a couple of Timmys blankets along with a package of juice boxes and my workout bag, then practically flew back inside, fearing the worst. But Eric was just how Id left him, and I started to breathe again once I saw him.
How long? How long have you been sitting here bleeding?
Not long, he said, his voice weak. Had to. Allie. I hurt
That wasnt you, I said sharply. That was Odayne.
That was me, he said firmly. Or it will be soon enough.
It damn well will be if you kill yourself, I said. Dear God, Eric, youll be twined with him forever.
But I wont know, Kate. I wont know. Its not consciousness like we have now. Ive been there, remember? And trust me Kate: I wont know.
I closed my eyes. But I will.
I cant do this, he said as I started to wrangle him out of his wet clothes. I had a T-shirt and the pants from a gi in my bag, and I was determined to get him in dry clothes and out of the bathroom. I cant stay like this and risk hurting Allie. Risk hurting you.
You wont, I said, although I didnt believe it. Id been at the theater, after all. And, of course, he knew that.
Dear God, I almost destroyed her.
You didnt, I said. Shes safe and you fought your way back out.
This time, he said. And neither one of us spoke the horrible truth: that it had been close. And if Allie hadnt had Ritas Taser, she could well be dead.
There wont be a next time, I said, my voice firm. We have a plan. We know how to end this.
He looked at me blankly, then shook his head. Some things. Some things Ive been able to keep from him. To hide. Ive had to fight, because when the demon comes out, he knows. He gets into my head. But there are a few things that I know. Things he wont let me tell, but still secrets that I keep.
I shook my head, not understanding. What secrets? What does the demon know?
He doesnt want me to use it. It would be the end of him.
My eyes went wide. The dagger! Eric, you do know where the dagger is? Tell me. Where is it?
His face contorted in pain, and I saw the scar on his back begin to bulge.
No, I cried. Dont even think about it. Forget the dagger. We dont need the dagger. We have another plan. I swallowed, and held his hands close. We can get rid of Lilithdo her in forever. And shes vile, Eric. You know how bad. So thats a huge thing. Because if we dont get rid of her, shes never going to leave us alone. Never going to leave Allie alone.
I waited, expecting him to speak, but he stayed silent.
I hesitated only a moment longer, and then continued. And although we cant kill Odayne, we can make him start all over. I drew in a shaky breath. Its going to be hard, but not any harder than this. Not any harder than what you planned to do. I licked my lips, looked him dead in the eye, and told him the plan to use the ring with Solomons Stone.
So I end up dead, he said after I had explained. Dead and still tied to that beast. I thought you said you had a solution.
Dammit, Eric, its the best solution we can find. The ceremony to unbind you from Odayne has been lost, I said, resisting the urge to blame him. But youll come back. Odaynes going to grow inside another body, you know he is. And while hes growing, you can be searching for a way out. And maybe the next time you can find your way free.
Maybe, he said, his voice harsh, angry. Not that I could blame him. The solution was hardly the best.
Theres another way, he said.
How? If there is, then tell me.
Do you love me, Katie?
My heart hitched. You know that I do.
Then come with me. Take me. Your life and mine.
I opened my mouth, certain Id misunderstood him, and just as sure that I hadnt. Eric . . . You cant ask me that. Allie. Timmy.
Were bound, Kate, he said. Did you know that they are, too? Odayne and Lilith. She created him for herself. Couldnt abide the thought of any other male except one shed rendered on her own. So she created him, breathed life into him. Loved him. Loves me.
His voice had gone a little singsong, and I shivered. Eric. Stop.
Its almost poetic.
Stop, I shouted, and saw with satisfaction that the dreamy look in his eyes cleared. Dont talk like this.
About their love? Or about ours? I thought you loved me, Katie. I thought we were soul mates.
This isnt something you can ask.
Why not? You love me?
Of course I do, I said, tears falling freely.
Then this is the solution. You know it as well as I do. Were bound, and we always have been.
I shook my head, horrified that hed ask me to take my own life, to toss away what God had given me and sacrifice my children in the process . . .
Although I knew that it had to be the demon talking, I still couldnt bear it, and I stood up, moved to the far side of the room and watched him with my back against the wall. I tried to speak, tried to tell him how, and tried to tell him why, but I couldnt find the words. And in the end, I simply stood there, watching him, and slowly shaking my head.
He watched me a moment. Are you going to die for me, Katie? he asked, as I watched the scar on his back begin to pulse with life.
I shook my head. No. And the Eric I know would never ask me to.
Funny, he said. The Katie I know would never say no.
Seventeen
In the safe room, I said to Eric. You have to go in.
No, he said. I cant. The pain.
You have to, I said, feeling close to hysterics. You know its the only way. Youre still weak, the demon will retreat inside, and if youre in the safe room, itll keep him at bay.
We were back at the mansion, the tension between us thick, and we hardly had the time for a heart-to-heart or to exchange warm fuzzies.
In the end, Eric had agreed to wear the ring. Hed agreed to the plan. And although it broke my heart to know that this was the last night Id see him on this earth, I comforted myself with the knowledge that he really was Eric. Because only Eric would have made the decision to sacrifice himself for Allie and me. More, I knew Eric was a fighter. Hed find a way out of the ether again, and he wouldnt give up until his soul was free.
Shell come for you, right? Shell come here? She can find you?
Shell come, he said. I told you, theyre bound.
Then the safe room makes even more sense. If the demons in pain . . .
I trailed off because there was no need to finish.
I know, he said. I know I have to. He drew in a breath. I can do it, he said, twisting the ring hed already placed on his finger. I have to do it.
Im right here, I said, and I think he knew that I meant more than the merely physical.
Since he was still unsteady, he had his arm around my shoulder, his other hand holding his cane. He stumped forward, then stopped when the safe room came into view. The door was open, and Allie was on the floor, peering out as if shed been keeping vigil, her face streaked with tears.
Daddy?
I watched him close his eyes, then hold out his hands for her. Im sorry, he whispered. Im so, so sorry.
She took a step forward, as if ready to run from the room to him, but I stopped her with a curt warning.
But, Mom!
You dont leave the room, I said, my eyes going from her to the others. None of you. I turned to Eric. Go on, then.
He hurried to Allie, his arms held wide, his face revealing a hint of the pain he felt entering the room. He buried it, though, and when she hesitated only a moment before rushing into his arms, the pain on his face evaporated completely, replaced by a wistful sadness that both broke my heart and filled me with relief.
Mindy, I noticed, remained in the far corner, her back to the wall and her eyes never leaving Eric.
Allie stepped back, her eyes on his wrists, bound as they were in strips of denim. What did you do? she asked.
I never meant to hurt you, he whispered. Id rather die than hurt you, he said, as more tears spilled down her cheeks.
This room . . . His hands clenched into fists, and through the thin, white T-shirt Id given him, I thought I saw the scar on his back writhe beneath his shirt.
Eric? I whispered.
He turned to me, his face tight, his skin pale. He clenched his hands into fists, and there was no denying the struggle going on inside this man. Shes coming. Dear God, shes practically here.
And, yes, she sure as hell was.
It started slowly. So slowly that I thought at first Eric was wrong. That a heavy truck was rumbling up the street. Or that we were feeling the first rumbles of an earthquake.
But trucks couldnt shake down a mansion, and earthquakes didnt go on for eternity.
And as we stood there, huddled in the safe room, the world around us began to rumble, the walls of the mansion shaking, and dust filling the air.
Around us, the walls seemed to scream as the foundation and framing were wrenched apart, the power of Lilith cutting a path in front of her, and we watched as the flooring in the kitchen and the hallway leading up to the safe room seemed to split, tiles bursting and flying, the walls cracking and shaking.
I slammed the door to the safe room shut and gestured for everyone to get in the middle of the room. The walls and floor and ceiling had been imbibed with the bones of saints, but that didnt stop the room itself from shaking as she tore through the rest of the house. And even as the world shook around us, my stomach clenched from the fear I saw on the face of everyone in that room with me.
Everyone, except Eric. There was no fear there. Only despair. And pain.
And then, with one horrible, dusty explosion, the door to the safe room exploded, splinters flying as I shouted for everyone to get back.
Allie jumped immediately, scooping up Timmy with one hand, and grabbing Mindy with the other even as Cutter jerked Laura and Rita to the far wall. Stuart moved to stand beside me, but Eddie hauled him back by the elbows, and I shouted out, crying for him to go, because I couldnt split my focus by worrying about my husband even while I worried about our plan.
I stood side by side with Eric, my hand clasped tightly in his even as the walls of the safe room began to crack and split.
And still, we hadnt seen her.
She is among the first of the demons, Eric said, his voice holding a soft, almost sensual reverence that had me looking at him sharply. She is strong.
Quite the understatement, I thought, in light of what she was doing to the house. And the truth was, Id never run across anything like this. Never met a corporeal demon with the power to destroy. In true form, yes. But as a human, never.
Lilith was a rare creature. Rare and terrifying and as she walked into view, the floor popping and churning and bursting apart as if blazing her path, I squared my shoulders and forced myself not to show my fear.
Eric? I whispered, desperate to know that it was still the man I knew beside me, and not the demon I despised. Because if Odayne had returnedif our plan was over before it had even begunthen I really would be afraid.
Its me, he said, and I exhaled in relief. Hes trying, but Im winning. For the moment. But, Kate, he added, ifif this is the endI want you to know
But he never got to say it. Because suddenly she was there. Right there, larger than life and filling the doorway.
And with a single hand extended in invitation, she called to him.
No, I said, stepping in front.
Her eyes barely even cut in my direction, and she surely never touched me, but it didnt matter. I was thrown backward, landing so hard against the back wall of the safe room that the impact cracked the plaster.
Mom!
Kate! Stuart was at my side in an instant, but I was already struggling to my feet.
Now! I cried to Eric. Now, before its too late!
And as I held my breath, he stepped out of the room and then, as her lips curled up in a victorious smile, he thrust his finger up and fast, going straight for her eye.
I held my breath, as I knew everyone around me was doing. It was going to work. It had to work.
And as we watched, the ring shattered, shards from the stone suddenly flying everywhere, the dust of the destroyed gemstone seeming to sparkle in the light.
I heard screaming, someone calling out, No! at the top of their lungs. And it was only when my throat hurt that I realized it was me.
Our chance to stop her had failed, the ring destroyed and useless. And as she smiled at meas the bitch moved to the very edge of the safe room and actually smiled at meI couldnt suppress the wave of revulsion that swept through me.
Odayne stood beside her now, the light inside that I knew was Eric slowly dying. He turned his head to look at her with such adoration it made my heart break, and when he turned to me, I could barely see through the tears. Its there, he said, the words coming out in a croak as if he was having to fight to force them past his lips. With the hidden. Like a secret. Find it. Use it.
And then the light faded, and he turned dead eyes on Allie. Come with me.
She took a step back, fear and revulsion and utter sadness on her face.
I moved to stand in front of her. All of us moved to stand in front of her. Were okay. They cant come in the room. I looked at Eric. Even he cant come in the room anymore.
Well said, Kate darling, Lilith said, her voice seemingly amplified in the small room. And so true. Fortunately, entering wont be necessary. She held out her hand. Come, child.
Never, Allie said, the strength in her voice making me proud.
Come, child, she repeated, and this time, Allie took a step toward her.
Mom? Mom, whats happening? The panic was unmistakable, as was the fact that she was moving forward, with slow, deliberate steps.
No, I said. No, no, no. I held on to her arms even as Stuart and Cutter and Laura grabbed on to her legs and Eddie held her around her waist.
Pitiful, Lilith said, and with one violent jerk, Allie was ripped from us.
Her screams seemed to sear my brain as she flew through the air to Liliths waiting arms. I raced forward, but was thrown back again, as was everyone else. And by the time Id climbed once again to my feet and raced out of the safe room, they were gone.
Just like that, theyd gone.
My knees went weak, my legs collapsing beneath me, and suddenly I was on the floor, Stuarts arms around me, his voice telling me wed find her, wed find her, that we were going to find her.
How? I forced the word out past the despair I felt. Allie and Eric. I couldnt bear it.
The tracking dot, Eddie said, crouching down beside me. Thats what you bought it for, right? Dont tell me you forgot to use it.
Got it, Eddie said, doing something to a tiny computer screen that he swore was tuned in to the microdot Id placed on Allies necklace. Theyre heading for the national forest.
On our way, Stuart said, steering the car into a sharp U-turn. It was the three of us alone in the car, chasing an electronic beep, desperate to find my daughter. At first Id told Stuart not to come, but hed refused, then casually reminded me that wed be wasting precious time by arguing. Shes my daughter, too, he said, and there was no wayno way in hellI was arguing with a statement like that.
Wed left the rest behind, Cutter and Laura and Mindy and Rita in the safe room with Timmy. It was an illusion at best. If Lilith wanted my son, wed just learned well enough that we couldnt stop her. But I couldnt think about that now. All I could think about right now was getting Allie back.
Id get her back, or Id die trying.
And if I could take Lilith down with me, so much the better.
Not that I could see any way of that happening. The bitch was powerful. Too powerful. The most I could hope for was to get my daughter back and to escape. And to hope that once Lilith had her lover, that she would go off on some sort of demonic honeymoon and leave the rest of my family alone.
Id lose Ericdear God, I could hardly bear to think of itbut if my kids were safe . . .
I knew, of course, why they wanted Allie. Id realized the moment Lilith had taken her. Eric had told me, though I dont think hed ever realized that his daughter was in danger. They needed his blood for the ceremony to bind him and Odayne. But Erics blood was no more, because Erics body was dead and buried. Davids blood would never suffice, not for that kind of magic.
And the only remaining blood of Eric Crowe flowed in the veins of his daughter.
I prayed that they needed only a drop. If they needed a sacrifice . . . Well, I couldnt even bear to think of it.
Have we got any chance at all? Stuart asked. Any chance of stopping her?
Cars stocked, Eddie said. Made sure it was before we left for the party. Trunks full of holy water super shooters and a few more Tasers. Got a selection of knives and crossbows. And I got a few handguns, too. Wont stop the bitch, but shell look a damn sight less pretty with a chunk of her face missing. And we got one other thing, too. If you kill Odayne, youre gonna hurt her. Gonna hurt her bad.
Except to do that, Stuart said, as he sped along the Coast Highway toward the cutoff to the canyon, we need that dagger. And weve never found it.
Dont even really know it existed, Eddie said, his eyes on the tracking device. If it did, youd think Odayne woulda found it. Found it and hidden it away just in case Eric was tempted to pass it on in one of his lucid moments.
Eric looked, I said, twisting around to speak to Eddie, who was in the backseat. He would have told me if he
What? Eddie said, his eyes narrowed as he peered at my face.
Here! I shouted, grabbing Stuarts arm. Turn here.
You cant get to the national forest through here, Stuart said.
Do it! I shouted, with such force that he complied, apparently without thinking. I know where the dagger is.
You sure? Eddie asked. Cause our girls in trouble, and if we take too long . . .
Im sure, I said, hoping, praying that I was right. Hoping that Erics cryptic words about the hidden and the secret had been a message and not mere ramblings.
I pointed the turns out to Stuart, and when he slammed on the brakes in front of the house Id once shared with Eric, I had the door open before the car had completely halted. I raced toward the house, burst through the broken doorway, and threw myself down in front of the window seat. I pried it open and found nothing, then broke my fingernails as I clawed open the loose board.
And there it was. The dagger. Odayne must have forced Eric not to tell me. But Eric had fought. And though he couldnt speak it directly, hed managed to hide it for me. And hed managed to give me a clue.
It was a magnificent weapon. An ornate hilt in the middle from which a curved blade extended on either side. As a whole, it formed a deadly crescent, but I also realized that the blades could slide apart at the hilt and it could be used as two daggers.
Theyre bound, I thought as I raced with my prize back to the car. Eric had explained how Lilith and Odayne were essentially one and the same.
So that should mean that if this dagger was capable of killing Odayne, then it should also be capable of killing Lilith as well.
The trick, of course, would be getting close enough to her to do it.
That, however, Id worry about when we got there.
We still have a chance, I said, climbing back into the car. We still have a chance to rescue Allie and destroy Lilith, too. Hurry, I said, but it wasnt necessary.
Stuart had already pulled away from the curb, and we were speeding back the way we came, heading toward the forest.
Heading for my daughter and the battle still to come.

As we hit the main entrance to the national forest, I realized that we didnt need the GPS tracker anymore. I knew where we were going. The Stone Table, I said. Discovered by botanists who had been investigating plant life, the table was in a near-inaccessible part of the forest, well off the beaten path, and experts assumed it had been used in ancient times by native tribes performing various rituals.
You cant be sure Stuart said.
I gave him a wry look. I can. Nadias used it before. Shes the one who broke it, I added, referring to the way the table had broken clean down the center in the midst of a demonic ritual not too long ago. The resultthough not the causehad made the local papers, with historical experts speculating all sorts of reasons for the tables destruction, most arguing that a small earthquake had rendered the table unstable.
Right, he said, making a hard left onto a walking trail as I gasped. He pushed the Infiniti as hard as he could for as long as he could, but soon it became clear that the car would go no farther. Out, he said. We run the rest of the way.
Eddie? I glanced quickly down at the tracking device. Im right, arent I?
Looks like, he confirmed, already half out of the car.
We grabbed gear from the trunk and started hauling ass toward the table, using our blades to cut through the growth where necessary. In fact, though, the path was clear. Lilith had come before us, and as shed blown a path through the mansion, shed cut a path through the forest.
Apparently, she wasnt terribly worried about being followed. Considering what Id seen her do, I couldnt say I blamed her.
I held up a finger to my lips, signaling the others to be quiet as we approached. A group of trees stood off the path at the edge of the clearing where the Stone Table stood. We eased that way, using the cover of the trees to remain hidden as we assessed the situation. And the situation really wasnt good.
Lilith moved in front of the remains of the Stone Table, her palm split open, and she marked the table with her blood, readying it for the ritual.
Odayne leaned against one broken half, his expression as he looked at her one of utter adoration. My baby lay on the other slab, bound there, her shirt ripped to form a V over her chest. The necklace had been ripped away, probably tossed to the ground somewhere, and I said a silent thank-you that theyd kept it on her neck long enough for us to find her.
Tears streamed down her face, but she was quiet, her jaw set in a firm line, and her eyes hard. She was terrified, yet she was holding. Dear God, my baby was holding.
I only hoped I could do the same.
Beside me, Stuart silently squeezed my hand, and when he looked at me, a thousand words passed between us. Words of comfort and hope and love. But it wasnt until he whispered, We will get her, and that bitch will die, that the sob broke free. I pressed my hand over my mouth, determined to be silent. Determined to be strong. Because I couldnt save Allie if I broke down.
Right then, she needed a Hunter, not her mother, and thats just what I intended to be.
Eddie pressed a hand to my forehead, his voice barely audible. You steady?
I nodded, then straightened my shoulders. Yeah. I was steady.
I figure your boy and I will go in full blast with the holy water, he said, his voice little more than a whisper. You go in straight and fast with the dagger. She knows we know how strong she is. She wont be expecting a straight-on attack. And because she is one hell of a strong she-bitch, we gotta take her down first. We dont manage that, and I think its safe to say were all dead.
He was right, and I knew it. And although the plan had riskshuge, horrible risksI didnt have a better one. More than that, we were running out of time. Lilith had finished marking the table. Now she was positioning herself in front of it, Odayne and Allie behind her, an athame held high in her hand. I swallowed, imagining that ceremonial knife being thrust down into my daughter, and I knew with a desperate certainty that this was not a ceremony Allie would survive.
Even if they only needed a drop of her blood, Lilith would kill my daughter. Not because she was mine, but because she was Erics. She would do it because it would prove, once and for all, that Odayne and Eric had fully merged. Eric wouldnt stop her. Instead, his grief and guilt would force him inside, even as her demonic lover took control of the body.
I held the double-bladed dagger at the hilt in the middle, ready to thrust it hard into Liliths eye, relishing the moment when I could do that. On three, I said, then counted down, the men beside me with super-squirter water guns at the ready.
On three, we burst out, rushing forward even as Allies screams of Mom! and Stuart! and Gramps! filled my ears. I kept my focus on Lilith who, I was rather distressed to see, didnt look the least bit surprised. The blasts of holy water from Stuart and Eddie were sizzling on her skin, rising as steam, but not leaving the familiar welts. Not a good signdefinitely not a good signand I could only hope that her false sense of security came from the fact that she didnt know we had the dagger.
Now, Kate! Stuart screamed, even as Odayne leaped from the table to knock the squirt gun from Stuarts hands. I couldnt worry about thathad to trust that Stuart could take care of himselfand I launched myself forward, landing on Lilith with enough force that she was knocked backward. I didnt hesitate, simply shoved the blade down, hard, into her eye, then pulled it free again, my breath hitching as I waited for the familiar moment when the demon would leave. I waited for her to drop down, destroyed, as foretold in the daggers legend.
That didnt happen.
She was fine. The bitch was fine. And I was straddling the strongest demon Id ever encountered walking the earth. A demon that could toss me across the park with only the force of her mind.
Little fool, she hissed. Do you think Im so easy to kill?
I said nothingmy thoughts racingand I realized she was right. I was a fool. Id believed that the connection between her and Odayne would have allowed the weapon against him to kill her, too, and Id risked all our lives by following that hunch. A foolish hunch.
A wrong hunch, that was now going to get us all killed.
I met her eyes, saw the pure hatred there, and knew then that I wasnt going down. Not without a fight.
Let. My. Daughter. Go.
Her lips curved into a sneer. No.
Bitch! I screamed, undone by both fury and fear, and without thinking, I brought the blade down, hacking at Nadias face with the razor-sharp blade.
Beloved! Beside us, Odayne kicked Stuart to the ground. His face and arms were covered with burns from Stuarts holy water, but he appeared not to notice. He rushed toward Lilith, plucked me off of her, and thrust his fist hard into my gut.
All the air left my body and I gasped, the dagger still tight in my hand. My eyes locked on his face as I tried to process the fact that Eric was attacking me. I knew I had to lash outto get him with the daggerbut this was Eric. I couldnt help believing that Eric would fight his way back to the surface. That he would break free.
It was Eric, or so I thought.
And I hesitated.
I hesitated, and it cost me, because as his fingers tightened around my neckas his thumbs pressed down against my windpipe, I kicked uselessly, the world turning gray and the dagger slipping from my fingers. Slipping away now that Id finally realized that the dagger really was my only chance.
Id lost that chance, I knew. And as the world began to fade around me, I saw both Eric and the demon in those silver-gray eyes. And knew for certain that Id lost him at last.
Around me, I could hear Allies cries, but there was nothingnothingI could do.
And then a sharp scream rent the sky, and pure, sweet air flowed into my lungs. I was on the ground, hed dropped me, and as I looked up, I realized that it was Eric who had screamed. Eric, with one blade of the dagger still thrust into his eye.
And Stuart standing there, the one who had wielded it. For the first time in his hunting career, hed wielded a knife and thrust it straight into a demons eye.
Into Erics eye.
You did it, Eddie whispered, as Stuart clutched my hand. Killed the demon, in its true form.
I didnt say the otherthat Eric was dead, too. I couldnt think about that. Couldnt think about the fact that Eric had died for me already, dead and gone when Odayne had tried to kill me.
Or maybe not, Stuart said, and as we watched Erics body writhe on the ground. I saw the familiar shimmer emerge from the wound in his eye, but instead of disappearing, it took form. And as I lay on the ground, still gasping for breath, the shimmer became a beast, and the beast became solid, and the beast became Odayne.
He was alive. His flesh gray and scaled. His fingers clawed. His eyes bulbous and red.
He was alive, and he was free of Eric.
And he was right there. Right there to kill or be killed.
I lunged for Erics body and the knife still lodged in his eye, and was shocked to see him stuttering for breath. I had no time to do anything about that, not with a demon about to swallow me whole. Gently, I disconnected the knives, leaving one blade in Eric. I closed my hand over the other half, but didnt move. I didnt want them to realize. I couldnt let them know. And so I stayed near Eric, listening to his slow, gasping breaths, and turned my head to see what horrors lay behind me.
Lilith had moved beside the monster Odayne, her eyes full of mirth. There was no concern at all on her face, and once again, I feared that I was wrong. That I didnt understand how this worked.
But I had to be right. I had to. Because if I wasnt, then we all were truly dead.
Beside her, Odayne roared, and Lilith screamed, Kill her! Kill the one who stole your humanity. Kill her, my beloved. Kill her in my name!
And with that, I whipped around. And as the snarling beast lunged for me, I thrust the dagger home, sliding it deep into the true demons chest and spilling a black mass of demon blood.
There was a flash of light and then the world seemed to turn red all around us. I heard Allie scream, and I felt the hair on my body stand up, as if lightning had struck only inches away.
Then the red passed and the world shifted back to normal, and when I looked around, Odayne was gone, and Lilith with him.
Eric had been right. They were bound.
And the death of Odayne in his true form had destroyed Lilith as well.
She hadnt known, hadnt even suspected that her love for Odayne would ultimately provide the means to kill her.
It was over.
We were alone, and Allie was safe, and Eric was alive.
I crouched again at his side, not certain if Id find Eric in the body or a new demon or even the original David, back to claim what was his.
But as I leaned over him, all questions faded.
It was Eric.
He was back. And, miraculously, he was alive.
Eighteen
Not too long now, the nurse said, her eyes kind despite her stern expression. You two relatives?
I I began, but Allie cut me off.
No, she said, turning flat eyes on me. Not relatives.
My heart twisted in my chest, and I took a deep breath as the nurse nodded briskly. Nonfamily visiting hours ends in ten minutes. But you go on in and visit. Maybe you can cheer him up. I wouldve thought a man who survived what he went through would have a smile on his face, but not our Mr. Long, she said. A quick smile flitted across her face, and she fluttered her hands as if maybe, just maybe, she thought shed spoken out of turn.
These things take time, I said, taking Allies hand and giving it a quick squeeze as I led her toward the door to Erics room. Hed been moved down from ICU that morning, and this was the first time wed been allowed to see him, the ICU visits having been restricted only to relatives.
As Allie had pointed out, we were only a friend and a student.
Are you okay? I asked, pausing outside the heavy wooden door. That wasnt your father who did that to you. It was the demon. Odayne had taken over.
I kept my voice firm and hard, as if by force alone I could will myself to believe what I was telling Allie. But the truth, I knew, was so very different. Odayne may have come out fighting, but Eric had still been in there, too. Hed been inside when it was happening, and he hadnt saved Allie, and he hadnt saved me.
I wanted to be the bigger person, to see Eric as the victim. But I was having one hell of a hard time with that.
Harder still was my certain knowledge that we might never have gotten here if hed shared his secrets with me all those years ago. Wed been good together, or so Id thought. And yet that essential trust had never been there.
Id thought it had, but Id been wrong.
No way, though, was I going to let what happened destroy Allies love for her father, no matter how intense my own doubts might be.
It really is okay, Mom. She squeezed my hand. Honest. My head totally gets it. Ive just gotta get my heart with the program.
He loves you, Al. Nothing will ever change that.
She looked at me, her eyes older than her fifteen years. Im not the only one who got hurt. Do you want me to say the same thing right back at you?
A whisper of a smile touched my lips, and I pressed a soft kiss to her forehead. I love you, I said, then grabbed hold of the handle and pushed the door open.
I saw his face first. His one eye closed, the area around it the deep purple of a stormy twilight. I could see nothing of the other, now-useless, eye, completely covered as it was with white gauze and surgical tape. The blade had sliced through the optic nerve before burying itself ten centimeters into his brain and missing his carotid artery by less than a millimeter. Hed lost the sight in his right eye, but that seemed a small price to pay for life. For his soul.
For himself.
A miracle, the doctors had said, and I had to admit I agreed. I believed in miracles, after all. But I knew better than to rely on them.
His bland, gray face shifted as his mouth curved up into a small smile. Company, he rasped, and when he opened his one eye, his smile grew bigger before fading as his eye clouded with worry. He held out his hand to Allie, and I could see the pain flicker across his face. Not from the surgery, but from the memories of what had happened. What hed done.
Im sorry, baby, he said. Im so, so sorry.
The dam broke then, my daughters stony face collapsing into a waterfall of tears. She rushed to him, taking his hand and perching on the hospital bed so close to him I winced for fear shed accidentally rip out a tube or something.
Its okay, Eric said, apparently reading my mind, and with that simple comment, my heart swelled a little.
Pretty crowded in this tiny room, I said. But at least youre not sharing.
Its the lap of luxury, he said, and Allie giggled.
You two havent had much time alone recently, I said. How about I go get a coffee for me and a soda for Allie. Id smuggle contraband in for you, but I dont want to get my hand slapped by the nurses.
That would be great, Eric said, the light blooming in his eyes telling me all I needed to know.
Allie? Soda? I asked, although I was really asking if it was okay for me to leave. She knew it, too, and answered with a quick nod. Great. Anything. Thanks.
I shot Eric one last look, our eyes lingering together for only a moment before I slid back through the door and parked myself on one of the uncomfortable plastic chairs in the hallway. And then, silently, I began to cry. Not huge gasping sobs, but silent tears that streamed down my cheeks as if cleansing me of fear and stress. This chapter was finally over. Erics body was clean, his soul free.
The past still loomed between us, though. A wall of secrets and harsh memories that I knew wed have to work through, brick by brick. It had, I realized now, always been there. Those secrets stacked up between us. Only recently had I been able to see it.
Hed shared his secrets too late, and it had almost cost him his soul. Almost cost him his daughter. My daughter.
That wasnt something I knew how to forgive.
You okay, honey? A squat nurse in Scooby-Doo scrubs handed me a tissue, and I realized that my cheeks were still wet. Hes doing real good. Dont you worry.
Thanks. Im fine.
Only five minutes left. You hold on and lets make sure you get your turn. She pushed open the door and I heard her relay the five-minute warning to Allie and Eric. A moment later, she came out, with Allie trailing behind.
He said he wanted to talk to you alone.
I never did get that soda for you, I said.
Ill go. Meet you back here in five. She hurried off down the hall without waiting for my answer.
I took a deep breath and went back into the room, was greeted by Erics wide smile.
Shes remarkable, he said.
Yeah. She is. Resilient, too.
So were we, he reminded me.
I sat in the chair Allie had abandoned, but I said nothing.
Katie. He reached for my hand, but I pulled it back, held my hands together in my lap.
I see, he said, then drew in a long breath. Well, at least that makes this easier. Im leaving San Diablo. I need to work this out.
I tilted my head, suddenly realizing what he meant. The demons gone, I said slowly, working to keep the fear out of my voice. We beat it.
Its gone, he agreed. But I have to figure this out. What I am. What I did. He looked at me hard. Kate, Im leaving.
His words hit me with the force of a slap. And though I opened my mouth to speak, he held up a hand to cut me off. I did this. Me. Do you think I can look at you, knowing what I did to you? What I did to Allie? Do you think I can live every day knowing that I almost killed both of you? His voice, soft but harsh, slid over the room on an undercurrent of rage. Or that Stuart saved you. And not from a distant threat, but from me. Do you think I can live with that?
Do you think I can? I spat back. But youre her father, and you cant just run away from this.
Im not running. Dont you see? Dont you see what Id become? If it was only the demon, Id have handed over the dagger to Nadia. Let her destroy it. But it was me in there, too, Kate, with enough control to keep my own secrets, even from a bastard who was living inside my head.
And in the end, you used that control to save us. You told me where youd hidden the dagger.
Thats not enough, he said. It doesnt make up for anything.
No, I thought, it didnt. But I didnt say that. Instead, I forced myself to meet his eyes. I can live with it, I said. I can deal. For Allies sake, we both have to.
Maybe you can, he said. But I cant.
She loves you, I whispered. And so did I, I thought. Despite everything that had happened, I loved him still. And I mourned the loss of what had once been between us.
He closed his eyes, and I felt a twinge of guilt, as if Id been playing dirty. Im sorry, Katie, he said, and I knew then that it was over.
Id lost him.
And Allie was the one whod pay the dearest price.
I dropped Allie at home, expecting to find Stuart there, holding tight to Timmy as had been his habit in these days since the battle. He was gone, though, and so I left my daughter with Eddie and her brother, then hurried to the mansion.
I had no way of knowing that hed be therehe hadnt told Eddie where he was goingyet I was certain I was right. And when I walked in, I found him sitting on the bottom step of the battered staircase, surveying the destruction.
There was a lot to survey. Deep gouges marred the beautiful wood flooring. Wallpaper hung in strips from the walls. Scorch marks marred the ceiling. And spiderweb cracks danced across what little glass was left in the doors to the balcony.
The entire wall between the entrance and the front parlor had crumbled to the ground, and now lay in a pile of wooden splinters and plaster rubble.
Stuart, I said, and then stopped. There really werent words.
Id been staying away, he said, his attention on the floor, the ceiling, anywhere but me. Staying home with you. With Allie. With Timmy. Watching television. Drinking beer. Pretending there was one thingjust one thingin our life that didnt kill or maim or hurt.
Stuart, please. I tried, but Im not sure the words came out. My throat was too thick, too clogged with unshed tears.
He stood and moved toward me, kicking debris out of his way as he did. I was going to buy this place for us, he said. Id worked it out with Bernie and everything. It seemed like the perfect house for our crazy family, especially once I learned about the safe room.
I swallowed, unreasonably touched by the gesture. And feeling horribly guilty for all the years Id kept my own secretsbuilding between Stuart and me a wall as impenetrable as the one Eric had built, and which I despised.
I realized now my mistake. Id clung to a past I didnt even fully understand so hard that Id risked my future with Stuart. A good man, who loved me.
The second man in my life who I loved with all my heart.
I could picture Timmy in here with his trains, he continued, getting underfoot even though wed tell him to keep them upstairs. And Allie would turn the attic into a workout room. I figured that much was inevitable. And youd be that much closer to the beach and Old Town and the cemetery for patrols. Not that demons roam cemeteries very often, he said, holding up a hand as though I were about to interrupt him. But there was something so very Demon Hunterish about having a house that overlooked a graveyard. He turned once, taking in the room with a sigh. We worked so hard to make this place special. And all of it was destroyed in less than ten minutes.
I realized then that I was crying. It still is special, I said, hearing the desperation in my voice. And all of this is fixable.
The house, maybe, he said, and the first jolt of fear shot through me, that wall Id built taking on form and substance. My mistakes and secrets crying out to me. Mocking me.
I shoved the fears away, forcing myself not to cry. What are you saying, Stuart? I asked, even though I didnt want to ask. Didnt want to know.
Im sorry, Kate, he said, as I felt the world fall out from underneath my feet. I thought being together was enough. I thought I could stomach it. Out there, in the world, and us standing together to keep it at bay. But it came in, Kate. It touched our family. It touched our lives, and thats not something I can live with. Its not something I want Timmy to live with.
Im his mother no matter what, I said, forcing my voice to stay calm as fear sparked through me. Nothing can change that. Not ever.
No, Stuart agreed. Nothing can. He met my eyes.
Im sorry, Kate.
I shook my head, as if the force of my will could change his direction. You told me once you were going to fight for me. For us. But youre not fighting, Stuart. Youre running away. And youre punishing me for being the woman I am. I wanted to fight him. Wanted to get a rise out of him, have this out, and have our life get back to normal.
Stuart, however, was having none of that. Instead he simply looked at me with that calm, media-ready face. I love you, Kate. Nothing will ever change that.
My legs gave out, and I slid to the floor, hugging my knees to my chest and rocking. Then stay, I said, resorting to begging. Please, please stay.
I cant, he said simply. Im sorry, but I cant.
I sat on the mansions broken and battered flagstone balcony, looking out over the cemetery toward the ocean and the setting sun.
Days had passed since Stuart had moved out of our house, since Eric had packed his car and driven south toward Los Angeles.
In my whole life, Id loved only two men, and now they were gone.
Stuart wasnt ass enough to deny me access to Timmy, so I was still seeing my little boy every day, thanks to Lauras willingness to play intermediary. I hated putting her in that position, but she swore she didnt mind. It was, she said, only temporary, and I desperately hoped she was right. The thought of divorce and custody arrangements and shuttling my baby back and forth for years and years overwhelmed me. And every time I let my mind go there, I began to cry all over again.
Mom?
I closed my eyes, willing the tears to stop flowing, needing to be strong for my daughter. But I couldnt manage it. Id been fighting for too damn long, and the strength I tried to compel eluded me.
I pressed my forehead to my knees, then felt Allies soft hand press against my back.
Itll be okay, she said, and her voice was so calm, so full of strength, that it compelled me to turn my head and look at my daughter through the haze of tears.
You grew up, I said. Sometime when I wasnt looking, you managed to grow up.
Maybe a little, she said modestly, but I could see the pleasure in her eyes. And I had really excellent help.
She sank down on the balcony beside me, mimicking my pose, arms around her knees, toes pointed out toward the ocean. Hes not gone forever, you know, she said. And before I could ask which of our men she was referring to, she amended the statement. Theyll be back. Both of them. I know a little bit about how they feel, she said. And Im certain theyre not gone for good.
She took her gaze off the Pacific long enough to meet my eyes, her steady gaze unblinking and sure, filled with far more maturity than I gave her credit for. My heart stuttered in my chest, and I put my arm around her, sighing as she leaned her head against me.
I sighed, too, overcome suddenly by a need to be parented. To have firm, sure arms hold me tight and rock me and tell me that everything was going to be all right. An image of Father Corletti filled my head, and the tears threatened again. My breath hitched as I fought them back, but not soon enough to escape Allies notice.
Mom?
Rome, I said. Its not a lazy beach vacation, but we can go for a couple of weeks. Let you meet Father. Try out some formal training. See the sights. I managed a smile. Will that do?
Her eyes widened as she nodded, and I watched the melancholy vanish from her face, her sad memories undoubtedly shoved aside by fantasies of swordplay on the Forza training floor.
As for me, I settled comfortably into the idea of going home. I needed the visit. I needed to get centered again. To go back to my roots. And I needed to get past what had become my new habitjumping when the phone rang or the doorbell chimed, expecting it to be Eric or Stuart.
The real truth was that I didnt really know what Id do if the two men I loved walked back into my life. Things had changed, and there was no going back. But hopefully, with time, wed move slowly forward.
And as the horizon burst into a cacophony of orange and red, one emotion fought its way upstream through the pain to settle quietly around my heart.
Hope.
Right then, that was enough.
Mom! Have you seen my passport?
I took a deep breath, carefully slid our plane tickets back into my purse, and aimed the evil eye at my daughter, whod come careening into the kitchen, ponytail bouncing, her mouth pursed in frustration.
Alison Elizabeth Crowe, the shuttle is supposed to be here in less than fifteen minutes, and now you tell me you cant find your passport?
Did you check your desk drawer? Laura asked, stifling a yawn. Despite the fact that we were heading out even before the sun, Laura and Mindy had come over to see us off.
Want me to help you look? Mindy asked. Under the bed, maybe? God! Im so jealous. I want to go to Rome.
I shot Laura a quick look, but she gave me the slightest shake of her head. Wed talked about her and Mindy joining us for a few days, but as we hadnt yet made specific plans, Laura didnt want to say anything and get Mindys hopes up.
Eddie rattled the newspaper and snorted. You check the purse, girlie?
Allie rolled her eyes, then held up her leather backpack. Im not taking a purse, Gramps.
He tapped his chest, and I watched Allies cheeks go pink. Oh. Right. She reached beneath her shirt and tugged out a black travelers wallet. She unzipped it, rifled through it, and smiled sheepishly at everyone in the room. Got it.
Im very glad to hear it, I said, as Laura hid her smile behind the rim of her coffee cup.
I drew in a breath and looked around the kitchen, wondering what I was forgetting. Ill call you when we get settled. You dont mind playing Internet liaison?
I told you I didnt, Laura said. Stuart had temporarily settled himself and Timmy in Bernies beach cottage, and the lure of tidal pools and the nearby Playscape was keeping my little boy occupied. Id gone over there last night to say good-bye, and Stuart had conveniently remembered urgent business at the office. But since I had no intention of not seeing Timmy during our Roman holiday, Laura had set up my laptop with video chatting. That alone would have qualified her for sainthood, but the fact that she had offered to watch Timmy during Stuarts working hours meant that I could see my little boy across the miles each and every day.
The arrangement eased some of my guilt about leaving. Guilt or no, I knew I had to go. Timmy would survive Mommys long vacation, and Allie needed this. For that matter, so did I.
You taking that knife? Eddie said. The one demon boy gave you? That earned him a scowl from everyone in the room, and he tossed his hands up and harumphed. What? Its true, aint it?
Yes, I said, thinking of the double-action blade that Eric had once given me. Of course. Its in my suitcase.
Wont be there when you get to Italy, he said, crossing his arms over his chest and leaning back.
Excuse me?
His caterpillar-like eyebrows twitched. They search. They search, then they take what they want. Its a whole big conspiracy.
I stared him down. No its not.
Eh, do what you want then, but mark my words, he added, pointing a bony finger at me. Youre gonna get to your hotel, unpack, and that knifes gonna be gone.
Were staying at a hotel? Allie asked, her voice suddenly frantic. I thought were were gonna stay in the Forza dorms. Mom!
We are, I told her. To Eddie, I added, Youve been watching too many movies.
Your loss, he said, which had me rolling my eyes again.
Im going to go make sure weve got luggage tags on everything, I said, then moved to the hallway. Which is where I was when Laura found me, rummaging in my suitcase for the knife Id decided to leave behind.
Sucker, she said.
He might be right. Besides, I can get another knife in Rome.
Her brows rose slightly. Are you going to need one? Youre going to see Father Corletti and let Allie get a taste of real training, right? Maybe do some sightseeing? Its not like youre going to be sliding into the catacombs hunting demons.
She had a point, but I only shrugged, noncommittal. If Id learned one thing for certain, it was to never take a demon for granted.
The sharp toot of a horn sounded outside, and my eyes darted to Lauras, even as a surge of excitement mixed with grief swept through me, making me more than a little unsteady. Were really going. I cant believe were really going. Part of me wished we were already gone, both so that I could see the place Id once known as home, and also so that I could escape the sadness that clung to me as I walked the halls of this house. Another part of me didnt ever want to leave, wanted instead to cling to that sadness. Because the longer I held on to it, the longer it was real. And if it was real, there was a possibility Id have that life again. A happy, suburban life with my husband, my kids, and my cat.
Those days, I knew, were behind me.
I just didnt want to accept reality.
You okay? Laura asked, looking so hard at me I was certain she could read my mind.
I will be. Ten hours in coach will set me right. I gave her a hug, then hauled my carry-on bag to my shoulder as Allie and Mindy bounded into the room.
The shuttles here! Come on, Mom! Lets go! She jumped in front of me, yanked open the door, then froze, emitting a tiny puff of air that formed into a single word: Oh.
Alarmed, I rushed to her side, expecting a demonic horde. Instead, I saw Stuart.
The Infiniti was parked in the drive, and my husband stood beside it, my sleepy son curled in his arms. At his feet were a suitcase, a briefcase, and a Thomas the Tank backpack.
I opened my mouth, but no sound came out.
Oh my God! Allie hooted, then ran to give him a hug. She stared down at the suitcases. Youre coming? Youre coming, too?
Stuart put a hand on her head, then looked at me. He said nothing, but reached into his briefcase and held up two plane tickets and two passports. It was easier to run than to fight, he said. But Ive been doing a lot of thinking, and Ive come to the rather astounding conclusion that life isnt always easy.
No, I said, managing to talk through the tears that had begun to silently stream down my face. No, it really isnt.
A pair of headlights cut through the night, and the airport shuttle slid to a halt in front of the house. Stuart looked over his shoulder at it, then looked at me. What do you say? You ready for the next adventure?
The band that had been constricting my heart for so many days loosened, and I nodded. Yeah, I said, taking a step toward him. Toward my family. Yeah, I really am.