Snake

Passed out drunk at a frat campout, Jason awoke naked to find that he was lying by a snake in the grass.

He lay still for a while, but the snake remained. Careful not to move too fast, Jason got hold of a stone near his hand and came down hard on the little snake.

It wasn't a snake.

His frat brothers call him stumpy, so Jason prefers to pee alone.

(c) 2003 Joe R. Lansdale.