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KIRRITH HAD
NOT BEEN MEANT to ride the wind: I was sure of it. All living things must
ride it someday, the Loreweavers said, The old and the sick rode the wind, as
did the great yellow leaves in the dry season when their edges frayed and
they could no longer hold onto the limbs; but Kirith had been my age, barely
grown to adulthood. We saw the
wind take her, as she crossed the vine bridge toward us from that slender,
leaning trunk which people call the Gray Dawn. It was the Quiet Wind that
pulled her through the vines; not any of the soft or raging sideways breezes
that can be felt on the skin. It was the Quiet Wind, the one that blows
forever downward, in the crownglades and flathomes, indoors and out, silent
and absolutely unceasing. She did not
choose to ride it. Her screams, her stretching arms told us that. One moment
she had been moving forward at a quick bridgestride, strong brown feet curled
to grip the swaying rungs; the next, she was whirling, crashing through woven
shade canopies, diminishing in the blue-green vaults below. Dust filtered
down, flashing in afternoon rays. For a long time after she was gone, none of
us could speak. We could only stare after her. The Quiet
Wind had taken my flute once, when my age was no more than seven or eight
sun-seasons. I remembered how the wind stole it from the fork where I had
propped it, and how I watched it roll and bounce away, never to be returned;
and how I had wept for it, for no flute is exactly like any other. That was
how the wind bore Kirith away. I kept
silence while the people mourned for her as they would for an old one, a sick
one. It was a strange sending, for there was no still, sleeping body to wrap
in leaves and give to the wind; this time the wind had not received, but
taken. I sat on the broken bridge, in the chilly shade of the twisted,
leaning Gray Dawn. Listening to the mourning songs, I peered down through the
jagged hole into the misty void, where sunlight slanted pale and faltering,
where leaf upon leaf hid that impossibly distant Place of Roots, to which
even most of the Loreweavers had never been. I touched the
shattered rungs, rubbed my thumb over the sun faded ends that had given way.
They were as yielding as the dry grasses that grew from bark -- left too long
without replacing, overlooked, since this was a little-traveled path beside a
stouter mainway. Worms had eaten the wood in places; I saw the circling,
haphazard grooves they had bored on the rungs' undersides. Kirith was
gone from her flathome because of forgotten maintenance, because of worms. It
had not been her time. There was no rightness in this, no harmony, and I had
no peace. Even when the last sending song's echoes had vanished, when
children laughed again and harvesters clambered over the trellises and arbors
with their knives, I thought of her, and of the family we might have raised
together. I broke off branches, hurled them as far as I could upward across
the glades, watched as that unfelt downward stream took each one. "Our
mothers teach us to fear you," I said to the Quiet Wind. "Nothing
that has breath may be given to you. What belongs to you is that from which
breath is gone. Why have you taken what was not yet yours?" The wise ones
told me, "Kirith is happier now." Even her mother said so.
"She is in the Glades of the Sun, where there is no wind at all, where
fruit ripens in every season and need not be tended. The dreams that rise
from the Place of Roots to trouble our sleep never rise there." I considered
the wise Loreweavers' words; I tried to imagine Kirith in the Other Trees,
light falling golden on her hair. The dry season came with its yellowing,
with its lengthening and splitting of pods. In turn, the seed season filled
the air with uncountable soft, drifting tufts, each a seed that would nestle
in a fork or on a broad, mossy branch and become another trunk. Rains came
next, sometimes whispering, sometimes roaring, washing the new leaves to
gleam in another season of sun. But Kirith was not here to make garlands of
the earliest white flowers, those that glistened in the cool hollows of the
old, wind-eaten trunks. Pushing my
face close to one such dim grotto, I remembered the rotten rungs of the
bridge. There were worms here, too, devouring the wood, their fat bodies
wriggling in the pulp that was no longer wood. This season the worms angered
me, and I did that which I had never done, nor ever seen done by anyone: I
crushed them under my hands, grinding them into the hard wall, painting the
rough bark with the soft slime they became. Then I fell to the moss, my arms
slick to the elbows with the horror of that which no one had ever done. In
the stillness of the ancient Evening Fork, the vast trunks of Day and Night
rising on either side of me, I heard Kirith's voice in the splash of the
stream, in the sighing of moss curtains. And I could not tell whether she
sang, faint and far away, or whether she wept. When I rose,
my limbs stiff and aching, I knew what I must do. I must follow the Quiet
Wind in the direction it had carried her. If she was lost in the Place of
Roots far below, unable to climb the trunks, then I must find her. No one, I
was sure, would give me a blessing for such a journey; not to that sun-forsaken
region from which the night's visions crept. So on the
next morning of gathering, when each with his or her basket would range far
from the flathomes in search of the ripening longfruit, I stuffed my belt's
pouch with nuts, dried berry cakes, and sweet grasses, enough for a climb of
several days. I circled away from my brothers, following the hub of bound
branches past the Vineglade and Voss's Fence. Beyond sight of the others, I
wedged my basket in an old restfork, where seats polished by generations of
passersby lay cradled in aromatic bowers of starbloom. Then I
descended. Hand over hand, by vines, by overgrown trellises, by the steps cut
in mighty boles, I departed from the airy realm. The leaves became fewer as I
went down -- fewer and darker, larger, like heavy cloaks abandoned on hooked
limbs. To sleep, I shared the knothole cave of a twitching silicus, his beard
grown long and tangled. He raised drooping eyelids to regard me, then rolled
to his other side, covered his face with twiggy paws, and continued his
fidgeting slumber. Night fell darker here, where starlight did not penetrate,
where the moon peered for the briefest span through a gap high above. Morning was
scarcely brighter, a gray suffusion of the vaults, boldening only to a somber
twilit blue at noon. The last leaves gave place to oily vines, their ominous
loops thicker than four people could join hands around. There were no steps
or carvings here; I made my way by braided trunks, by the natural stairways
of arches upon arches. Always I was mindful of the Quiet Wind, which tugged
at my ankles on the slippery paths, threatening to pluck me from the trees
and make me ride. The fragrance of new growth was gone, and all the world
seemed damp, dripping, and tainted. Worms must be here, writhing and chewing
beneath every surface. That night I shivered in the open, unwilling to
clamber inside any of the odorous holes, afraid of what might lurk in their
depths. I scarcely slept, listening to the ticking and scratching of
creatures I could not see, things for which I knew no names. The next dawn
was no dawn at all, but the merest paling of the gloom that just allowed me
to pick a creeping course down trunks so massive I could hardly see any curve
to the faces. Their ravaged walls peeled in out-thrust runners large as
platforms, the route faintly lighted by glowing, bulbous growths. Some
shelves let my feet plunge through, left me dangling waist deep in bark above
the void. Half-glimpsed shapes of unsettling lengths and proportions scuttled
away from me, and a dank humidity arose to soak my garments. Vapors formed a
hedge so solid that the sounds of my breathing bounced back loud. Near the
journey's end, when my head spun with weariness and the all-pervading stench,
the descent became easier. What I supposed at first to be enormous limbs shot
out from the boles, dove in sprawling nets of chaos into a mire of blackness.
As I eased gratefully onto the uppermost of these sloping paths, I realized
the livid carpet beneath me was the endless flat surface from which all trees
grow, and that I stood upon those anchoring nether appendages of the trees
themselves. I had come to the Place of Roots. Lower I
hurried now, slipping from root to root, floundering through brakes of sickly
shining hooded stalks; lower and lower, until the midnight morass rose to
meet me, until I came level with the grotesque caves beneath the roots. Glinting in
the pallid light on every side, under every tree marching away into oblivion,
rose jumbled mounds of whitish branches...branches, I thought, and yet
nowhere could I see any of a form or texture I knew. They linked together,
interlocked, some fastened at the ends by gray or brownish cords. I crept to
the edge of the nearest heap, overwhelmed by its size. Here, in the first
such mound alone, lay more of these age-old things than there were leaves in
the crown of the Noon Trunk itself. Some were no longer than my fingers,
brittle, porous in places like a rotting twig, hard overall, but soft and
dark at the core. Some were large as young trunks, four times my height, dry
and rough, half-buried in the muck of seasons unnumbered. But what trunk
could produce such bizarre limbs, and why were they gathered here, clutched
by the roots of the trees that held our flathomes? Crawling lower,
I circled a third of the great stack, staring into the bars and cracked
fragments of its impenetrable shadows. Somehow, I knew, the secrets of the
Quiet Wind lay hidden here, locked in the embrace of these shards.
Ridiculously, I thought that if I could squirm my way to the center, I might
find the flute snatched from me so long before; and finding it, perhaps I
would understand. As I poked
and prodded, a sharp length came away, clattered across my foot. I lifted it,
turned it in the wan light: a crooked piece bent like my elbow, only curved
and flat. On its inner edge grew a strange row of squarish knobs -- no, not
grown there, but embedded. Recoiling
with a shock of awareness, I lost my footing and sat down hard on the root,
nearly dropping the branch. The squared knobs, I suddenly saw, were teeth.
Teeth like my own, but these were larger than my fist. What sort of tree, I
asked myself in growing dread, sprouts teeth as its fruit? I flung the
object away, watched it plummet with a soft, liquid sound into the mire
below, and lie trapped, a splash of yellow-white against the black. Wiping my
hands on my sodden shirt, revulsed at the touch of the tooth-branch, I looked
around at the lumpish growths that glowed, at the roots ascending to the
trunks. This was the end of all descents, where the Quiet Wind brought all
things it stole -- and where its power ended, for here there was no lower
places here, growing things started their laborious journeys toward the sky. When I gazed
again into the white branches, I cried out, leapt to my feet: now I saw faces
peering out at me. Hard faces they were, dry and white like the teeth and
branches, yet unmistakably faces; these were of the same size as mine, though
their eyes were empty holes, their noses hollow pits, and they had neither
ears nor hair. Yet the teeth...the teeth might have been mine, or those of
anyone in the flathomes. Here and there the faces leered out of the pile,
though none spoke or moved. None, I saw, had bodies, and with relief I told
myself these were not real people at all, but things made, like the husk
dolls with which children played. Then a
whisper passed among the roots behind roes something stirred in the stagnant
world. I turned, and in my exhaustion, in the unreasoning hope that had
brought me to this place, I half expected to see Kirith floundering toward
me. Her hair would shimmer even here with the sunlight that clung to her
wherever she went. She would call to me, dance over the mud; I would catch
her in my arms, and our laughter would ring from the meaningless white
branches. The hollow-eyed faces in the roots would watch us climb together. But it was
not Kirith that loomed monstrous over the roots. Tipping back my head, I
watched a gyring shape rise higher and higher, a bloated, branchless trunk,
horribly segmented and soft -- a tremendous worm. Ropes of ooze trailed from
its belly. It squirmed with slick, sucking noises, its weight shuddering the
wood. Up, down, in hideous spirals, the beast insinuated itself through the
root-caves, through the stacked white branches, which tumbled and rattled
away from its thrusting, eyeless head. Its wrinkled flesh exuded the very
fetor that had brought my dizziness, that permeated all this rotting gulf. Shrinking,
half-fainting, I pressed myself into a hollow as the plunging mouth -- a
circular pit, lined with knife-teeth -- fed on the white branches, on the
tree roots, on anything it encountered. I shrieked, heedless of discovery,
covering my eyes and ears. When I raised
my head, the thing had quested past, length by rippling length, to other
stacks. Still I could hear its ponderous pounding, its slithering wetness,
and still I choked on the air it had defiled. I recall
little of my upward journey; only that, before I climbed the trunks, I
shouted Kirith's name until my voice failed, and that I searched long among
the silent mounds. Now I am old,
and soon I will join Kirith in the Glades of the Sun. I know she waits for me
there; my heart is at ease since I learned she is not lost and wandering in
the dark abyss. I have been a Loreweaver myself, singing of light and beauty,
watching seasons change. Seeds, rain, sun, and drying, the forest renews
itself, its music unceasing. But I understand, too, why the Loreweavers speak
little when the night wind rages in storms, making the limbs twist with deep
groans. There is wisdom in silence, and they find the greatest peace who do
not climb too far seeking truth; for behind every answer lies a greater
mystery. My journeys are finished now, save one. When my breath is gone, I
will be wrapped in leaves and ride the Quiet Wind, borne away amid the
sending songs. I will not linger in that place where the vast, colorless worm
gnaws at the roots of all that we are and know. |