1953
OF QUALITY
JUDITH
MERRIL, a top-notch science-fiction writer herself, has gained worldwide renown
as the premiere anthologist and critic of imaginative fiction. More and more,
science-fiction is merging with the mainstream of literature, and her
anthologies brilliantly illustrate this exciting development.
Now
Judith Merril displays to the full her encyclopedic knowledge, her rare taste,
and her unequaled sense of the full possibilities of the science-fiction form
in this superlative gathering of the best of the best in science-fiction and
fantasy. This is the one book of the year no science-fiction fan can afford to
miss.
THE BEST OF THE BEST
EDITED BY
Judith Merril
A DELL BOOK
Published
by DELL PUBLISHING CO., INC. 750
Third Avenue New York, N.Y.
10017
Copyright © 1967 by Judith Merril
All
rights reserved
Dell
® TM 681510, Dell Publishing Co., Inc.
Reprinted
by arrangement with Delacorte Press New York, N.Y.
Printed in Canada First Dell printing—August 1968
ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
"The Hoofer," by Walter M. Miller,
Jr., © 1955 by King Size
Publications, Inc.
Reprinted by permission of the author and his
agents, the Harold Matson
Company, Inc. "Bulkhead," by Theodore Sturgeon, © 1955 by Theodore
Sturgeon.
Reprinted by permission of
the author and his agent, Robert P.
Mills.
"The Anything Box," by Zenna
Henderson, © 1956 by Zenna
Henderson. Reprinted by
permission of the author and her agents,
Collins-Knowlton-Wing,
Inc. "Prima Belladonna," by J. G. Ballard, © 1956 by J. G Ballard.
Reprinted
by permission of the author. "Casey Agonistes," by Richard M.
McKenna, © 1958 by Mercury
Press, Inc. Reprinted by permission of Mrs.
Richard McKenna. "A Death in the House," by Clifford D. Simak, © 1959
by Galaxy
Publishing Corp. Reprinted
by permission of the author and his
agent,
Robert P. Mills. "Space-Time for Springers," by Fritz Leiber, © 1958
by Fritz Leiber.
Reprinted
by permission of the author and his agent, Robert P.
Mills.
"Pelt,"
by Carol Emshwiller, © 1958 by Mercury Press, Inc. Reprinted by permission of
the author. "Stranger Station," by Damon Knight, © 1956 by Fantasy
House,
Inc.
Reprinted by permission of the author. "Satellite Passage," by
Theodore L. Thomas, © 1958 by Quinn
Publishing Co., Inc.
Reprinted by permission of the author and
his
agent, Robert P. Mills. "No, No, Not Rogov!," by Cordwainer Smith, ©
1958 by Quinn
Publishing Co., Inc.
Reprinted by permission of the author's
agent, Harry Altshuler.
"Compounded Interest," by Mack Reynolds, © 1956 by Fantasy
House, Inc. Reprinted by
permission of the author and his agent,
the
Scott Meredith Literary Agency, Inc. "Junior," by Robert Abemathy, ©
1955 by Galaxy Publishing Corp.
Reprinted
by permission of the author. "Sense from Thought Divide," by Mark
Clifton, © 1955 by Street
& Smith Publications,
Inc. Reprinted by permission of the author's
agent,
Ann Elmo Agency, Inc. "Mariana," by Fritz Leiber, © 1960 by
Ziff-Davis Publishing Co.
Reprinted
by permission of the author and his agent, Robert P.
Mills.
"Plenitude," by Will Worthington, ©
1959 by Will Worthington. Reprinted by permission of the author and his agent,
Robert P. Mills.
"Day
at the Beach," by Carol Emshwfller, ® 1959 by Carol
Emshwiller. Reprinted by permission of the
author. "Let's Be Frank," by Brian W. Aldiss, © 1957 by Brian W.
Aldiss.
Reprinted by permission of the author.
"The Wonder Horse," by George Byram, © 1957' by The Atlantic
Monthly Company. Reprinted by permission of
the author and his
agents, Curtis Brown, Ltd. "Nobody
Bothers Gus," by Algis Budrys, © 1955 by Street & Smith
Publications, Inc. Reprinted by permission of
the author and
the Scott Meredith Literary Agency, Inc., and
the author's agent,
Candida Donadio. "The Prize of
Peril," by Robert Sheckley, © 1958 by Mercury
Press, Inc. Reprinted by permission of the
author and his agent,
Harry Altshuler.
"The Handler," by Damon Knight, ©
1960 by Greenleaf Publishing Company. Reprinted by permission of the author.
"The Golem," by Avram Davidson, © 1955 by Fantasy House, Inc.
Reprinted by permission of the author.
"The Sound Sweep," by J. G. Ballard, © 1959 by J. G. Ballard.
Reprinted by permission of the author.
"Hickory, Dickory, Kerouac," by Richard Gehman, © 1958 by
HMH Publishing Co., Inc. Reprinted by
permission of the author
and his agents, Littauer & Wilkinson.
"Dreaming Is a Private Thing," by Isaac Asimov, © 1955 by Fantasy
House, Inc. Reprinted by permission of the
author. "The Public Hating," by Steve Allen, © 1955 by Steve Allen.
Reprinted by permission of Holt, Rinehart
& Winston, Inc. "You Know Willie," by Theodore R. Cogswell,
© 1957 by
Fantasy House, Inc. Reprinted by permission
of the author. "One Ordinary Day, with Peanuts," by Shirley Jackson,
© 1954 by
Fantasy House, Inc. Reprinted by permission
of the author's
agents, Brandt & Brandt.
This book is respectfully and gratefully
dedicated to
anthony boucher, knox burger
and jim hawkins, who
taught me.
CONTENTS
Introduction Judith Merril 1
THE HOOFER
Walter M. Miller,
Jr. 9
BULKHEAD
Theodore
Sturgeon 21
THE ANYTHING BOX Zenna Henderson 56
PRIMA BELLADONNA J. G. Ballard 71
CASEY AGONISTES Richard M. McKenna 86
A DEATH IN THE HOUSE Clifford D. Simak 98
SPACE-TIME FOR SPRINGERS Fritz Leiber 119
PELT
Carol
Emshwiller 132
STRANGER STATION Damon Knight 143
SATELLITE PASSAGE Theodore L. Thomas 169
NO, NO, NOT ROGOV! Cordwainer Smith 180
COMPOUNDED INTEREST Mack Reynolds 199
JUNIOR
Robert
Abernathy 213
SENSE
FROM THOUGHT DIVIDE Mark Clifton 221
MARIANA Fritz Leiber
255
PLENITUDE
Will Worthington 261
DAY AT THE BEACH Carol Emshwiller 274
LET'S BE FRANK Brian W. Aldiss
285
THE WONDER HORSE George Byram 295
NOBODY BOTHERS GUS Algis Budrys 310
THE PRIZE OF PERIL Robert Sheckley 325
THE HANDLER
Damon Knight 344
THE GOLEM
Avram Davidson 349
THE SOUND SWEEP J. G. Ballard 355
HICKORY, DICKORY, KEROUAC Richard Gehman 395
DREAMING IS A PRIVATE THING Isaac Asimov 398
THE PUBLIC HATING Steve Allen 415
YOU
KNOW WILLIE Theodore R. Cogswell
423
ONE ORDINARY DAY, WITH PEANUTS Shirley Jackson 428
INTRODUCTION
I don't read introductions myself: not ahead of
time. Anything the author, or his friend or admirer has to say about it may
interest me after I have read the book. Occasionally, I go back to a preface
part way through the book, hoping for some sort of background to place
unfamiliar or difficult material in context; but, that's rare, and there really
ought to be a different label for that kind of introduction.
The
stories in this anthology are not difficult; some of them were surely
unfamiliar in tone or subject when they were first published, in the remote
Sputnik and pre-Sputnik days, but there is nothing in here that needs
footnoting for the ordinary space-age citizen of the sixties. Nevertheless,
custom (and my contract with the publishers) requires that a collection of
this sort have a preface.
I
understand that the basic function of the introduction is advertising. I am
supposed to tell you how good the book is and make you want to read (buy) it.
Quickly, then—this is a very good book. If you are just deciding whether or not
to read (buy) it, i suggest you turn immediately to the first page of the first
story (or any other story); any one of them will be more convincing, and much
more entertaining, than I am likely to be.
Presumably,
I could stop here: perhaps wisely so. But it occurs to me that some of you may,
after reading the stories, be interested in the background from which they
came. Perspective and context I can talk about—at length. The problem becomes
one of where to start and how to slop. Suddenly I still don't want to write an
introduction: I want to write a book.
"Science
fiction isn't a livelihood for you, it's a way of life," a typist
told me once. True.
Science
fiction—by which I mean for the moment the science-fiction field—has been my life,
in large degree, for the last twenty years
or so. I have made my living from it, and derived most of my entertainment and
education through the reading and writing of it. My closest friends and most
uncomfortable enemies were made among the writers and editors and publishers of
SF. My children were raised on its ideas. Books and correspondence files
overrun my living quarters. What traveling I have done has been inspired by
science-fiction happenings or people, and often made possible by professional
connections.
In
short, I am prepared to talk at length about what it (SF, s-f, science fiction, science fantasy, speculative fiction—if) is and
where it fits and who does it and why, and whether it's worth it. I will try to
limit myself only to what applies to this particular book.
Science fiction as a descriptive label has long since lost
whatever validity it might once have had. By now it means so many things to so
many people that—even though there are more and more people to whom it means
something—I prefer not to use it at all, when I am talking about stories. SF (or generically, s-f) allows you to think science fiction if you like, while I think science fable
or scientific fantasy or speculative fiction, or (once in a rare while, because there's little enough of it being
written, by any rigorous definition) science fiction.
(I
am not going to trap myself into attempting a definition of what I mean by science fiction; enough to say that of the stories in this
book, those by Thomas, Reynolds, Byram, Budrys, and Asimov, and Carol
Emshwiller's "Day at the Beach" are all valid examples.)
So I
say SF—but I still think science fiction: like it or not, the label slicks. It has a
ring to it that suits our times: an implicit dialectical synthesis equally
expressive of our acclimatization to the evermore-fantastic facts of daily
life, and the growing popularity of fact-filled fantasy and fiction.
("True stories" have taken over the pop-magazine field; sex becomes
so graphic it ceases to be suggestive; the Timeless West is vanishing before a
flood of dates and names; the Private Eye has become a form-filling-out police
detective, and the psychiatric crime-suspense novel has given way to the
gadget-and-gimmickful spy story.)
In
fact, one of the main difficulties with science fiction as a label for a particular kind of story, or
category of publishing, is a popular reversal of meaning most often applied by
editorial writers for Time-life, political speechmakers, and a certain breed of
science writer teacher: phrases like "a scienceficlional adventure"
or "an accomplishment positively sciencefictional" or "beyond
sciencefiction" mean.
as we all immediately understand, not a fantasy based on science or scientific reasoning, but a truly
astonishing fact.
Aside
from the inversion-process, there is a sideways slippage. To the moviegoer,
"science fiction" has come to mean "horror." A
"science-fiction movie" means The Blob from Time, not Dr. Sfrange-fove. To the comic-book
addict, it means Superman and his many friends. To the TV viewer, it is
beginning to mean "space story" instead of "chiller," as
Star Trek takes over from the Twilight Zone.
And
of course, in book publishing, "science fiction" means either a book
written by an author whose name is familiar to s-f book-buyers, or any
poor-to-mediocre book with fantastic or futuristic elements written by an
unknown. (So Vonnegut's Player Piano was
"science fiction" in 1952, and "caustic social comment"
when it was reissued in 1966; anything by Sturgeon is science fiction; anything
by John Barth or John Hersey is not.)
People read for two reasons: to get away from
reality, and to get closer to it; the ideal story form, I suppose, is the fable,
which does both. In his introduction to the first SF Annual, Orson Welles
suggested that s-f stories are "our modern fables." More recently
there has been much talk (from me among others) about SF as modern myth. II may
seem pretentious to speak of a field which degenerates so readily into mere
adventure story as the replacement for classical philosophy in our time—and yet
this is to some extent the role s-f has been playing. Science-fiction is not
fiction about
science, but fiction which
endeavors to find the meaning in science and in the scientific-technological
society we are constructing.
This
book, then, contains 29 s-f stories, by which I mean a special sort of contemporary writing which
makes use of fantastic or inventive elements to comment on, or speculate
about, society, humanity, life, the cosmos, reality, and any other topic under
the general heading of philosophy. They are, generally speaking, the stories
that looked best to me on rereading, out of all those included in the first
five SF Annuals. That means, among other things, that they were all published
between 1955-1960, a significant half-decade with special import
for speculative fiction.
I started work on the 1st Annual in the fall
of 1955. Two of the stories in this book were first published in January, 1955,
and three more in March—which means one or more was probably written at least
as early as 1953.
1953 was the year Dwight Eisenhower became
President of the United States, and the Korean war ended, and McCarthy became
Chairman of the Senate Committee on Government Operations. Stalin died. The
peptide molecule was synthesized for the first time. Dr. Oppenheimer, the
"father of the H-bomb," was dismissed from government employ as a
bad security risk. John F. Kennedy, the junior Senator from Massachusetts
married society girl, Jacqueline Bouvier. Dylan Thomas died; James Baldwin
published his first novel; William Burroughs wrote Junkie. The Old Alan and the Sea won a Pulitzer for
Hemingway.
1954 was the Supreme Court ruling on integration,
and Dien Bien Phu, and the formation of SEATO. Winston Churchill retired as
Prime Minister; McCarthy was censured by the Senate. The USSR exploded an
H-bomb; the first peace-use atomic power plant was opened in Shippingport, Pa.
Aldous Huxley published a book of his experiences with mescalin. The Doors of Perception.
In
'55, the Salk vaccine for polio was put into use; the CIO and AFL merged; there
were Freedom Riders in the South; the DNA and RNA molecules were synthesized;
Cat on a Hot Tin Roof won the Pulitzer drama prize; nobody paid much attention
to the early publicity releases coming from Washington about the satellites to
be orbited during the International Geophysical Year. The anti-proton was
produced in a laboratory.
'56:
Sen. Kennedy (D„ Mass.) failed to gain the vice-presidential nomination. Fidel
Castro landed in Oriente Province and started fighting his way to Havana. The
U.S. conducted an aerial H-bomb test over Bikini atoll. Premier Diem refused to
allow a Vietnam election. A Walk on the Wild Side and Giovanni's
Room came out, and Around the World in 80 Days brought wide-screen vision to the world. The
Rebel won a Nobel Prize for Camus.
'57
was Kerouac's On the Road and Kennedy's Profiles in Courage; the first Little
Rock ruckus; the Principle of Conservation of Parity, and the Sabin sugarcubes;
O'Neill's long Day's Journey
into Night. Ghana achieved
independence. And in October—Sputnik I.
In
'58, the first atomic submarine was launched; Alaska was admitted to the
Union; the Diner's Club began; the Space Race got underway. '59 was the Castro
victory in Cuba, college students in phone booths, lolita banned and Lady Chatterley sold, the first Soviet moon rockets, and the
Able-Baker rockets in the U.S.
When
the last of the Annuals represented here was published, in 1960, more than 20
satellites had gone up, the lunch-counter sit-ins were starting. The Catcher in
the Rye had become a Big Thing on
INTRODUCTION 5
Campus, Hawaii was the 50th State. Elizabeth
Taylor had found happiness at last with Eddie Fisher, and John F. Kennedy was
campaigning against Richard Nixon for the Presidency.
No
one—well, hardly anyone—had yet heard of the Beatles or Bob Dylan or Dick
Gregory. Malcolm X was barely known outside Harlem. McCarthy was dead, but not
McCarthyism, which seemed to have taken root in the American soul. There was
much concern about science education, and classics were being dropped from
school curricula. Khrushchev had not-been to Disneyland, and people were
starling to worry about China instead of Russia.
This
was the lime, so close and somehow so remote, during which these stories were
written and published. It was a time of adjustments, culmination, transitions,
announcements, rather than new achievements. (The basic satellite designs were
on the drawing boards in 1952; the polio research was completed in 1953; Castro
was already gathering his forces in 1954; and so forth.) This was even more
true inside science fiction.
The
best s-f of the forties had been [often brilliantly) predictive; the overall
lone up through the early fifties was instructive, indeed evangelist; science
fictionists were triumphant prophets of atomic power and space flight, direful
forewarners of atomic war and brainwashing and overpopulation.
In
the early fifties, the bright new ideas and urgent messages were Fewer. Between
1948 and 1952, new writers had poured into the field, and new ideas as well as
new techniques emerged in every issue of the proliferating magazines. Between 1955
and 1960, I think more writers left the field than came into it; the number of
magazine titles fell off sharply; the new-concepts writing began to be found in
RAND reports and NASA releases, more than in s-f. The beginning of the industrial,
political, and technological space age meant the beginning of a new period of
exploration in "the human factor," as opposed to the
"hardware," for both science and science fiction. The interesting new
work tended to emphasize literary qualities rather than philosophic ones. And
by 1955, the field had achieved just enough literary respectability to be able
to serve a vital
function: during the entire period covered by this anthology, it was the
science-fiction magazines that provided the only widely read medium for protest
and dissent in a witch-haunted country.
It
was a curious combination of pressures and circumstances which resulted in the
best American short fiction of that period being published in magazines most
"literary" people (still) were not willing to have seen on their
coffee tables. And it is interesting to note that the sophistication of science
fiction through those years was, to some extent at least, a conscious process.
In 1956, the first Milford Science Fiction
Writer's Conference took place under the joint direction of Damon Knight, James
Blish, and myself. Thirty-odd writers attended, and discussed things like symbolism
in fiction and techniques of criticism, as well as problems of marketing and
plotting. The impact of the week of talks on those who attended was enormous,
and the Conference has continued to function as an arena for serious
professional discourse.
An
indirect result of the Conference was a publication edited for several years by
Theodore Cogswell, called Proceedings of the Institute for Twenty-first Century Studies. PITFCS published articles, limericks,
nonsense stuff, poetry, and letters—most of all, letters. It provided a running
round-robin for everyone professionally involved with s-f—and its full role in
the development of the field, and of some individual writers, is hard to
overestimate.
This anthology, as I said earlier, is made up
of the stories in the first five Annuals that seemed best to me in
retrospect—in a general way.
For
instance, Daniel Keyes' "Flowers for Algernon" is not here, because
it has since been published as a novel even better than the original novelette
version. Eugene lonesco's "Flying High" is missing because I could
not secure permission to reprint. And half a dozen more I'd have liked to
include, there was simply not enough space for.
Beyond
that, there are stories missing here that should by all means be in any volume
called The Best of the
Best—but they were not in
the Annuals to begin with. Some of these were permission problems, some were
editorial restrictions imposed by the publishers, some again, lack of space.
The considerations that go into the makeup of each year's Annual, are complex:
Charles Beaumont's "The Vanishing American," for instance, was
published in Fantasy
and Science Fiction in
1955; there were too many stories from that magazine, and loo many conformity/alienation stories that year, so it dropped out; in
another volume, it would have been a sure
selection.
Some
other authors whose work was significant and popular during the period
involved are not here and were not in the original Annuals because they were
not writing short fiction at the time, or because a great deal of good fiction
from one author does not always add up to individually excellent stories.
INTRODUCTION 7
But
while there are, to my knowledge, at least as many other stories published
between 1955—60 that are just as good as these —these still (and I know I said
it before) are very good indeed.
I have read each of them many times now, and I know.
THE HOOFER
Walter
M. Miller, Jr.
Walter M. Miller, Jr., is best known for his only novel, A Canticle for Liebowitz (Lippincott, 1959); he has also published two
collections of short fiction. Conditionally Human (1962) and The View from the Stars (1965).
Born
in Florida in 1923, Miller served in the Air Corps during World War II as radio
operator and gunner, flying 55 missions over Italy and the Balkans. He began
writing in 1950 during his convalescence from an automobile accident which
interrupted his G.I.-bill studies at the University of Texas. He took his
degree in electrical engineering a year later, and shortly afterward returned
to Florida, where he still lives with his wife and four children.
Miller's
first short story was published in American Mercury and received an Honorable Mention in The Best
American Short Stories
for 1950. Between 1951-1957,
he published approximately 40 stories in the science-fantasy magazines,
including the three novellas in Fantasy & Science Fiction in 1955—57 on which Canticle was
based; among the stories most widely reprinted since are "Command Performance",
"Crucifixus Etiam", "Momenlo Homo", and
"Darfsteller", which won science fiction's annual "Hugo"
award for short fiction in 1955.
He
has also written for television, most notably for the gone-but-not-forgotten Captain Video show of the early fifties.
"The
Hoofer" was first published in Fantastic Universe, September, 1955, and is reprinted from the 1st SF Annual.
They
all knew he
was a spacer because of the white goggle marks on his sun-scorched face, and so
they tolerated him and helped him. They even made allowances for him when he
staggered and fell in the aisle of the bus
while
pursuing the harassed little housewife from seat to seat and cajoling her to
sit and talk with him.
Having
fallen, he decided to sleep in the aisle. Two men helped him to the back of the
bus, dumped him on the rear seat, and tucked his gin bottle safely out of
sight. After all, he had not seen Earth for nine months, and judging by the
crusted matter about his eyelids, he couldn't have seen it too well now, even
if he had been sober. Glare-blindness, gravity-legs, and agoraphobia were
excuses for a lot of things, when a man was just back from Big Bottomless. And
who could blame a man for acting strangely?
Minutes later, he was back up the aisle and
swaying giddily over the little housewife. "How!" he said. "Me
Chief Broken Wing. You wanta Indian wrestle?"
The
girl, who sat nervously staring at him, smiled wanly, and shook her head.
"Quiet
li'l pigeon, aren'tcha?" he burbled affectionately, crashing into the seat
beside her.
Two
men slid out of their seats, and a hand clamped his shoulder. "Come on,
Broken Wing, let's go back to bed."
"My
name's Hogey," he said. "Big Hogey Parker. I was just kidding about
being a Indian."
"Yeah.
Come on, let's go have a drink." They got him on his feet, and led him
stumbling back down the aisle.
"My
ma was half Cherokee, see? That's how come I said it. You wanta hear a war
whoop? Real stuff."
"Never mind."
He
cupped his hands to his mouth and favored them with a blood-curdling proof of
his ancestry, while the female passengers stirred restlessly and hunched in
their seats. The driver stopped the bus and went back to warn him against any
further display. The driver flashed a deputy's badge and threatened to turn him
over to a constable.
"I gotta get home," Big Hogey told
him. "I got me a son now, that's why. You know? A little baby pigeon of a
son. Haven't seen him yet."
"Will you just sit
still and be quiet then, eh?"
Big
Hogey nodded emphatically. "Shorry, officer, I didn't mean to make any
trouble."
When the bus started again, he fell on his
side and lay still. He made retching sounds for a time, then rested, snoring
softly. The bus driver woke him again at Caine's junction, retrieved his gin
bottle from behind the seat, and helped him down the aisle and out of the bus.
Big
Hogey stumbled about for a moment, then sat down hard in the gravel at the
shoulder of the road. The driver paused with one foot on the step, looking
around. There was not even a store at the road junction, but only a freight
building next to the railroad track, a couple of farmhouses at the edge of a
side-road, and, just across the way, a deserted rilling station with a sagging
roof. The land was Great Plains country, treeless, barren, and rolling.
Big Hogey got up and staggered around in
front of the bus, clutching at it for support, losing his duffle bag.
"Hey,
watch the traffic!" The driver warned. With a surge of unwelcome
compassion he trotted around after his troublesome passenger, taking his arm as
he sagged again. "You crossing?"
"Yeah," Hogey
muttered. "Lemme alone, I'm okay."
The
driver started across the highway with him. The traffic was sparse, but fast
and dangerous in the central ninety-mile lane.
"I'm
okay," Hogey kept protesting. "I'm a tumbler, ya know? Gravity's got
me. Damn gravity. I'm not used to gravity, ya know? I used to be a tumbler—hukl—only now I gotta be a hoofer. 'Count of li'l Hogey. You know about li'l
Hogey?"
"Yeah. Your son. Come
on."
"Say, you gotta son? I
bet you gotta son."
"Two
kids," said the driver, catching Hogey's bag as it slipped from his
shoulder. "Both girls."
"Say,
you oughta be home with them kids. Man oughta stick with his family. You oughta
get another job." Hogey eyed him owlishly, wagged a moralistic finger,
skidded on the gravel as they stepped onto the opposite shoulder, and sprawled
again.
The
driver blew a weary breath, looked down at him, and shook his head. Maybe it'd
be kinder to find a constable after all. This guy could get himself killed,
wandering around loose.
"Somebody
supposed to meet you?" he asked, squinting around at the dusty hills.
"Huk!—who, me?" Hogey giggled, belched, and
shook his head. "Nope. Nobody knows I'm coming. S'prise. I'm supposed to
be here a week ago." He looked up at the driver with a pained expression.
"Week late, ya know? Marie's gonna be sore—woo-hoo!—is she gonna be sore!" He waggled his
head severely at the ground.
"Which
way are you going?" the driver grunted impatiently.
Hogey
pointed down the side-road that led back into the hills. "Marie's pop's
place. You know where? 'Bout three miles from here. Gotta walk, I guess."
"Don't,"
the driver warned. "You sit there by the culvert till you get a ride.
Okay?"
Hogey nodded forlornly.
"Now
stay out of the road," the driver warned, then hurried back across the
highway. Moments later, the atomic battery-driven motors droned mournfully, and
the bus pulled away.
Big
Hogey blinked after it, rubbing the back of his neck. "Nice people,"
he said. "Nice buncha people. All hoofers."
With
a grunt and a lurch, he got to his feet, but his legs wouldn't work right. With
his tumbler's reflexes, he fought to right himself with frantic arm motions,
but gravity claimed him, and he went stumbling into the ditch.
"Damn legs, damn crazy
legs!" he cried.
The
bottom of the ditch was wet, and he crawled up the embankment with mud-soaked
knees, and sat on the shoulder again. The gin bottle was still intact. He had
himself a long fiery drink, and it warmed him deep down. He blinked around at
the gaunt and treeless land.
The
sun was almost down, forge-red on a dusty horizon. The blood-streaked sky faded
into sulphurous yellow toward the zenith, and the very air that hung over the
land seemed full of yellow smoke, the omnipresent dust of the plains.
A
farm truck turned onto the side-road and moaned away, its driver hardly
glancing at the dark young man who sat swaying on his dufflebag near the
culvert. Hogey scarcely noticed the vehicle. He just kept staring at the crazy
sun.
He shook his head. It wasn't really the sun.
The sun, the real sun, was a hateful eye-sizzling horror in the dead black pit.
It painted everything with pure white pain, and you saw things by the reflected
painlight. The fat red sun was strictly a phoney, and it didn't fool him any.
He hated it for what he knew it was behind the gory mask, and for what it had
done to his eyes.
With a grunt, he got to his feet, managed to
shoulder the duffle bag, and started off down the middle of the farm road,
lurching from side to side, and keeping his eyes on the rolling distances.
Another car turned onto the side-road, honking angrily.
Hogey
tried to turn around to look at it, but he forgot to shift his footing. He
staggered and went down on the pavement. The car's tires screeched on the hot
asphalt. Hogey lay there for a moment, groaning. That one had hurt his hip. A
car door slammed and a big man with a florid face got out and stalked toward
him, looking angry.
"What
the hell's the matter with you, fella?" he drawled. "You soused? Man,
you've really got a load."
Hogey
got up doggedly, shaking his head to clear it. "Space legs," he prevaricated.
"Got space legs. Can't stand the gravity."
The
burly farmer retrieved his gin bottle for him, still miraculously unbroken.
"Here's your gravity," he grunted. "Listen, fella, you better
get home pronto."
"Pronto?
Hey, I'm no Mex. Honest, I'm just space burned. You know?"
"Yeah.
Say, who are you, anyway? Do you live around here?"
It
was obvious that the big man had taken him for a hobo or a tramp. Hogey pulled
himself together. "Goin' to the Hauptman's place. Marie. You know
Marie?"
The
farmer's eyebrows went up. "Marie Hauptman? Sure I know her. Only she's
Marie Parker now. Has been, nigh on six years. Say—" He paused, then
gaped. "You ain't her husband by any chance?"
"Hogey, that's me. Big
Hogey Parker."
"Well, I'll be—! Get
in the car. I'm going right past
John
Hauptman's place. Boy, you're in no shape to walk it."
He
grinned wryly, waggled his head, and helped Hogey and his bag into the back
seat. A woman with a sun-wrinkled neck sat rigidly beside the farmer in the
front, and she neither greeted the passenger nor looked around.
"They
don't make cars like this anymore," the farmer called over the growl of
the ancient gasoline engine and the grind of gears. "You can have them new
atomics with their loads of hot isotopes under the seat. Ain't safe, I say— eh,
Martha?"
The
woman with the sun-baked neck quivered her head slightly. "A car like this
was good enough for Pa, an' I reckon it's good enough for us," she drawled
mournfully.
Five
minutes later the car drew in to the side of the road. "Reckon you can
walk it from here," the farmer said. "That's Hauptman's road just up
ahead."
He
helped Hogey out of the car and drove away without looking back to see if Hogey
stayed on his feet. The woman with the sun-baked neck was suddenly talking
garrulously in his direction.
It
was twilight. The sun had set, and the yellow sky was turning gray. Hogey was
too tired to go on, and his legs would no longer hold him. He blinked around at
the land, got his eyes focused, and found what looked like Hauptman's place on
a distant hillside. It was a big frame house surrounded by a wheatfield, and a
few scrawny trees. Having located it, he stretched out in the tall grass
beyond the ditch to take a little rest.
Somewhere
dogs were barking, and a cricket sang creaking monotony in the grass. Once
there was the distant thunder of a rocket blast from the launching station six
miles to the west, but it faded quickly. An A-motored convertible whined past
on the road, but Hogey went unseen.
When
he awoke, it was night, and he was shivering. His stomach was screeching, and
his nerves dancing with high voltages. He sat up and groped for his watch, then
remembered he had pawned it after the poker game. Remembering the game and
the results of the game made him wince and bite his lip and grope for the
bottle again.
He
sat breathing heavily for a moment after the stiff drink. Equating time to
position had become second nature with him, but he had to think for a moment
because his defective vision prevented him from seeing the Earth-crescent.
Vega
was almost straight above him in the late August sky, so he knew it wasn't much
after sundown—probably about eight o'clock. He braced himself with another swallow
of gin, picked himself up and got back to the road, feeling a little sobered
after the nap.
He
limped on up the pavement and turned left at the narrow drive that led between
barbed-wire fences toward the Hauptman farmhouse, five hundred yards or so from
the farm road. The fields on his left belonged to Marie's father, he knew. He
was getting close—close to home and woman and child.
He
dropped the bag suddenly and leaned against a fence post, rolling his head on
his forearms and choking in spasms of air. He was shaking all over, and his
belly writhed. He wanted to turn and run. He wanted to crawl out in the grass
and hide.
What
were they going to say? And Marie, Marie most of all. How was he going to tell
her about the money?
Six
hitches in space, and every time the promise had been the same: One more tour, baby, and we'll have enough
dough, and then I'll quit for good. One more time, and we'll
have our stake—enough to open a little business, or buy a house with a mortgage
and get a job.
And
she had waited, but the money had never been quite enough until this time. This
time the tour had lasted nine months, and he had signed on for every run from
station to moon-base to pick up the bonuses. And this time he'd made it. Two
weeks ago, there had been forty-eight hundred in the bank. And now . . .
"Why?"
he groaned, striking his
forehead against his forearms. His arm slipped, and his head hit the top of the
fencepost, and the pain blinded him for a moment. He staggered back into the
road with a low roar, wiped blood from his forehead, and savagely kicked his
bag.
It
rolled a couple of yards up the road. He leaped after it and kicked it again.
When he had finished with it, he stood panting and angry, but feeling better.
He shouldered the bag and hiked on toward the farmhouse.
They're hoofers, that's all—just an
Earth-chained bunch of hoofers, even Marie. And I'm a tumbler. A born tumbler.
Know what that means? It means—God, what does it mean? It means out in Big
Bottomless, where Earth's like a fat moon with fuzzy mold growing on it. Mold,
that's all you are, just mold.
A
dog barked, and he wondered if he had been muttering aloud. He came to a
fence-gap and paused in the darkness. The road wound around and came up the
hill in front of the house. Maybe they were sitting on the porch. Maybe they'd
already heard him coming. Maybe . . .
He
was trembling again. He fished the fifth of gin out of his coat pocket and
sloshed it. Still over half a pint. He decided to kill it. It wouldn't do to go
home with a bottle sticking out of his pocket. He stood there in the night
wind, sipping at it, and watching the reddish moon come up in the east. The
moon looked as phoney as the setting sun.
He
straightened in sudden determination. It had to be sometime. Get it over with,
get it over with now. He opened the fence-gap, slipped through, and closed it
firmly behind him. He retrieved his bag, and waded quietly through the tall
grass until he reached the hedge which divided an area of sickly peach trees
from the field. He got over the hedge somehow, and started through the trees
toward the house. He stumbled over some old boards, and they clattered.
"Shhh!" he hissed, and moved on.
The
dogs were barking angrily, and he heard a screen door slam. He stopped.
"Ho
there!" a male voice called experimentally from the house.
One
of Marie's brothers. Hogey stood frozen in the shadow of a peach tree, waiting.
"Anybody out
there?" the man called again.
Hogey
waited, then heard the man muttering, "Sic 'im, boy, sic 'im."
The
hound's bark became eager. The animal came chasing down the slope, and stopped
ten feet away to crouch and bark frantically at the shadow in the gloom. He
knew the dog.
"Hookey!" he
whispered. "Hookey boy—here!"
The dog stopped barking,
sniffed, trotted closer, and went "Rrrooff!" Then he started sniffing suspiciously again.
"Easy, Hookey, here
boy!" he whispered.
The
dog came forward silently, sniffed his hand, and whined in recognition. Then he
trotted around Hogey, panting doggy affection and dancing an invitation to
romp. The man whistled from the porch. The dog froze, then trotted quickly back
up the slope.
"Nothing,
eh, Hookey?" the man on the porch said. "Chasin' armadillos again,
eh?"
The
screen door slammed again, and the porch light went out. Hogey stood there
staring, unable to think. Somewhere beyond the window lights were—his woman,
his son.
What
the hell was a tumbler doing with a woman and a son?
After
perhaps a minute, he stepped forward again. He tripped over a shovel, and his
foot plunged into something that went squelch and
swallowed the foot past the ankle. He fell forward into a heap of sand, and his
foot went deeper into the sloppy wetness.
He
lay there with his stinging forehead on his arms, cursing softly and crying.
Finally he rolled over, pulled his foot out of the mess, and took off his
shoes. They were full of mud—sticky sandy mud.
The
dark world was reeling about him, and the wind was dragging at his breath. He
fell back against the sand pile and let his feet sink in the mud hole and
wriggled his toes. He was laughing soundlessly, and his face was wet in the
wind. He couldn't think. He couldn't remember where he was and why, and he
stopped caring, and after awhile he felt better.
The
stars were swimming over him, dancing crazily, and the mud cooled his feet, and
the sand was soft behind him. He saw a rocket go up on a tail of flame from the
station, and waited for the sound of its blast, but he was already asleep when
it came.
It
was far past midnight when he became conscious of the dog licking wetly at his
ear and cheek. He pushed the animal away with a low curse and mopped at the
side of his face. He stirred, and groaned. His feet were burning up! He tried
to pull them toward him, but they wouldn't budge. There was something wrong
with his legs.
For
an instant he stared wildly around in the night. Then he remembered where he
was, closed his eyes and shuddered. When he opened them again, the moon had
emerged from behind a cloud, and he could see clearly the cruel trap into which
he had accidentally stumbled. A pile of old boards, a careful stack of new
lumber, a pick and shovel, a sand-pile, heaps of fresh-turned earth, and a concrete mixer—well, it added up.
He
gripped his ankles and pulled, but his feet wouldn't budge. In sudden terror,
he tried to stand up, but his ankles were clutched by the concrete too, and he
fell back in the sand with a low moan. He lay still for several minutes,
considering carefully.
He
pulled at his left foot. It was locked in a vise. He tugged even more
desperately at his right foot. It was equally immovable.
He
sat up with a whimper and clawed at the rough concrete until his nails tore
and his fingertips bled. The surface still felt damp, but it had hardened
while he slept.
He
sat there stunned until Hookey began licking at his scuffed fingers. He
shouldered the dog away, and dug his hands into the sand-pile to stop the
bleeding. Hookey licked at his face, panting love.
"Get away!" he
croaked savagely.
The
dog whined softly, trotted a short distance away, circled, and came back to
crouch down in the sand directly before Hogey, inching forward experimentally.
Hogey
gripped fistfuls of the dry sand and cursed between his teeth, while his eyes
wandered over the sky. They came to rest on the sliver of light—the space
station—rising in the west, floating out in Big Bottomless where the gang
was—Nichols and Guerrera and Lavrenti and Fats. And he wasn't forgetting
Keesey, the rookie who'd replaced him.
Keesey
would have a rough time for a while—rough as a cob. The pit was no playground. The first
time you went out of the station in a suit, the pit got you. Everything was
falling, and you fell with it. Everything. The skeletons of steel, the
tire-shaped station, the spheres and docks and nightmare shapes—all tied
together by umbilical cables and flexible tubes. Like some crazy sea-thing they
seemed, floating in a black
ocean with its tentacles bound together by drifting strands in the dark tide
that bore it.
Everything was pain-bright or dead black, and
it wheeled around you, and you went nuts trying to figure which way was down.
In fact, it took you months to teach your body that all ways were down and that the pit was bottomless.
He became conscious of a
plaintive sound in the wind, and froze to listen. It was a baby crying.
It was nearly a minute before he got the
significance of it. It hit him where he lived, and he began jerking frantically
at his encased feet and sobbing low in his throat. They'd hear him if he kept
that up. He stopped and covered his ears to close out the cry of his
firstborn. A light went on in the house, and when it went off again, the infant's
cry had ceased.
Another rocket went up from the station, and
he cursed it. Space was a disease, and he had it.
"Help!" he cried out suddenly.
"I'm stuck! Help me, help me!"
He knew he was yelling hysterically at the
sky and fighting the relentless concrete that clutched his feet, and after a
moment he stopped.
The light was on in the house again, and he
heard faint sounds. The stirring-about woke the baby again, and once more the
infant's wail came on the breeze.
Make the kid shut up, make the kid shut up ...
But that was no good. It wasn't the kid's
fault. It wasn't Marie's fault. No fathers allowed in space, they said, but it
wasn't their fault either. They were right, and he had only himself to blame.
The kid was an accident, but that didn't change anything. Not a thing in the
world. It remained a tragedy.
A tumbler had no business with a family, but
what was a man going to do? Take a skinning knife, boy, and make yourself a
eunuch. But that was no good either. They needed bulls out there in the pit,
not steers. And when a man came down from a year's hitch, what was he going to
do? Live in a lonely shack and read books for kicks? Be-
cause you were a man, you sought out a woman.
And because she was a woman, she got a kid, and that was the end of it. It was
nobody's fault, nobody's at all.
He stared at the red eye of Mars low in the
southwest. They were running out there now, and next year he would have been on
the long long run ...
But there was no use thinking about it. Next
year and the years after belonged to little Hogey.
He sat there with his feet locked in the
solid concrete of the footing, staring out into Big Bottomless while his son's
cry came from the house and the Hauptman menfolk came wading through the tall
grass in search of someone who had cried out. His feet were stuck tight, and
he wouldn't ever get them out. He was sobbing softly when they found him.
BULKHEAD
Theodore
Sturgeon
Theodore Sturgeon is probably science fantasy's most-reprinted
author: of the hundred-odd short stories, novelettes, and novellas published in
magazines between "Ether Breather" in 1939, and "Tandy's
Story" in 1961, almost all have since appeared in book form; some of the best-known
("Microcosmic God", "Killdozer", "Thunder and
Roses", "Saucer of Loneliness") have been reprinted five or six
times in English-language collections alone. His outstanding novel. More Than Human, won the International Fantasy Award in 1952, and a short story,
"Bianca's Hands", was awarded the British Argosy $1000 prize in 1947.
Born
on Stolen Island in 1918, Sturgeon grew up in Philadelphia with one basic
ambition: to become a circus acrobat. When rheumatic fever made that career
impossible, he worked as a roustabout for a while, then went to sea in the
merchant marine. Sold his first story at eighteen, to McClure's Syndicate for
$5.00; shortly afterwards came ashore to slay, and except for short spells (as
hotel executive, bulldozer operator, literary agent, etc.), has been a
full-time writer since. He now lives in Woodstock, N.Y., with his wife and
their four children.
Sturgeon
has published seven novels (one under the pen name, Frederick R. Ewing, and one
a "novelization" of a movie), and almost a dozen short-story
collections, the latest of which was Sturgeon in Orbit (1964). In September, 1963, the magazine Fantasy & Science Fiction published an issue in his honor, centered on
one of his rare stories of recent years, "When You Care, When You Love".
Since then, most of his time has gone to critical writing (If and National Review, primarily), and to television work; only two
pieces of fiction (in Playboy
and Sports Illustrated) have appeared until the recent Doubleday
anthology. Dangerous Visions,
which included his new
"If All Men Were Brothers, Would You Let Your Sister Marry One?"
"Bulkhead"
was originally published (as "Who?") in Galaxy, and was reprinted in
the collection, A Way Home (Funk & Wagnall, 1955)
and in the 1st SF Annual. Other stories of
Sturgeon's—"The Other Man", "The Comedian's Children", and
"The Man Who Lost the Sea"—appeared in the 2nd, 4th, and 5th SF
Annuals.
■ ■HI
You just don't look through viewports very often.
It's
terrifying at first, of course—all that spangled blackness and the sense of
disorientation. Your guts never get used to sustained free-fall and you feel,
when you look out, that every direction is up, which is unnatural, or that every direction is down, which is sheer horror. But you don't stop looking out there because it's
terrifying. You stop because nothing ever happens out there. You've no
sensation of speed.
You're not going anywhere.
After
the weeks and months, there's some change, sure; but from day to day, you can't
see the difference, so after a while you stop looking for any.
Naturally,
that eliminates the viewports as an amusement device, which is too bad. There
aren't so many things for a man to do during a Long Haul that he can afford to
eliminate anything.
Getting
bored with the infinities outside is only a reminder that the same could
happen with your writing materials, and the music, the stereo and all the rest
of it.
And
it's hard to gripe, to say, "Why don't they install a such-and-such on
these barrels?" because you've already got what a thousand spacemen griped
about long since— many of them men with more experience, more imagination and
less internal resources (that is to say, more need) than you'll ever have.
Certainly more than you have now; this is your first trip and you're just
making the transition from "inside looking out" to "inside
looking on."
It's a small world. It better be a little complicated.
A
lot that has happened in worlds like these would be simple to understand, if
you knew about it. Not knowing is better, though; it keeps you wondering. Some
of it you can figure out, knowing as you do that a lot of men have died in
these things, a lot have disappeared, ship and all, and some (but you don't
know how many) have been taken out of the ships and straight to the laughing
academy.
You
find out fairly soon, for example, that the manual controls are automatically
relayed out, and stay out of temptation until you need them to land. (Whether
they'll switch in if you need them for evasive maneuvering some time, you don't
know yet.) Who died—how many died— because they started playing with the manual
controls? And was it because they decided to quit and go home? Or because they
convinced themselves that the auto-astrogator had bugs in it? Or because they
just couldn't stand all those stationary stars?
Then
there's this: You're alone. You have a shipmate, but even so, you're alone. You
crouch in this little cell in the nose of your ship, with the curving hull to
your left and the flat wall of the midship bulkhead to your right. Because it's
there, that bulkhead, you know that in previous models it wasn't. You can
imagine what happened in some (how many?) ships to make it necessary to seal
you away from your shipmate.
Psychodynamics
has come a long way, but you called this a world; well, reduce a world to two
separate nations and see what happens. Between two confined entities, there's
no mean and no median, and no real way of determining a majority. How many
battered pilots have come home crazed, cooped up with the shredded bodies of
their shipmates?
So
that's easy to understand—you can't trust two human beings together. Not for
long enough. If you don't believe it, look at the bulkhead. It's there because
it has to be there.
Being
a peaceable guy, it scares you a little to know how dangerous you are.
Makes you a little proud, though, doesn't it?
Be
proud of this, too—that they trust you to be alone so much. Sure, there is a shipmate; but by and large you're alone, and that's what's expected of
you. What most people, especially Earthside people, never find out is that a
man who can't be by himself is a man who knows, away down deep, that he's not
good company. You could probably make it by yourself altogether ... but you must admit you're glad you
don't have to. You have access to the other side of the bulkhead, when you need
it. If you need it. It didn't take you too long to figure out you'd use it sparingly.
You have books and you have games, you have
pictures and text tapes and nine different euphorics (with a watchdog
dispenser, so you can never become an addict) all of which help you, when you
need help, to explore yourself. But having another human mind to explore is a
wonderful idea—a wonder tempered by the knowledge—oh, how smart you were to
figure it out in time!—that the other mind is a last resort. If you ever use up
the potentialities it holds for you, you're through, brother!
So
you have endurance contests with yourself to see how long you can leave that
bulkhead alone.
You
go back over your life, the things you've done. People have written whole
novels about 24 hours in a man's life. That's the way you think it all out,
slowly, piece by piece; every feature of every face and the way they were used;
what people did and why. Especially why. It doesn't take any time to remember
what a man did, but you can spend hours in thinking about why he did it.
You
live it again and it's like being a little god, knowing what's going to happen
to everyone.
When
you reported to Base, there was a busload of guys with you. Now you know who
would go all the way through the course and wind up out here; reliving it, you
can put yourself back in the bus again and say, "That stranger across the
aisle is Pegg. He isn't going to make it. He'll go home on furlough three
months from now and he'll try to kill himself rather than come back. The freckled
nape in the seat ahead of you belongs to the redhead Walkinok, who will throw
his weight around during his first week and pay expensively for it afterward.
But he'll make it."
You
make friends with the shy dark guy next to you. His name is Stein and he looks
like a big-brain. He's easy to talk to and smart, the kind of fellow who always
goes straight to the top. And he won't last even until the first furlough; two
weeks is all he can take, and you never see him again. But you remember his
name. You remember everything and you go back over it and remember the memories
in between the memories. Did somebody on that bus have shoes that squeaked?
Back you go and hunt for it. If it happened, you'll remember it.
They
say anyone can recall this way; but for you, with what the psycho-dynamicians
have done to you—or is it for you?—you
can do more of this than anybody. There isn't anything that ever happened in
your whole life that you can't remember. You can start at the beginning and go
all the way through. You can start at the beginning and jump years in a second
and go through an episode again ... get
mad again... fall in love again.
And
when you get tired of the events themselves, you can run them off again, to
find out why. Why did Stein go through those years of study and preparation,
those months of competition, when all the time he didn't want to be in the Space Service? Why did Pegg conceal from himself that he
wasn't fit for the Space Service?
So
you cast back, comb, compare and ponder, keeping busy. If you're careful, just
remembering lasts a long time, wondering why lasts even longer; and in between
times, there are the books and stereos, the autochess and the music ... until you're ready to cast and comb in
your memories again. But sooner or later—later, if you're especially
careful—you'll get restless and your life as it was played out, and the reasons
why it was played just that way, all that gets old. You can think of no new
approach to any of it and learn nothing more from it.
That's
where the centerline bulkhead comes in handy. Its very shape is a friendly
thing to you; the hull on your left is curved, being part of the ship's side,
but the bulkhead is a flat wall. Its constant presence is a reminder that it
has a function, like everything else in your world; that it is, by nature, a
partition; that the existence of a partition presupposes another compartment;
and that the other compartment is the size and shape of this one and designed
for a similar purpose—to be a dwelling for someone.
With
no sound nor sign of occupancy, the bulkhead still attests the life behind it,
just by being there. It's a friendly flatness, a companionable feature of your
world, and its company pervades all your thinking.
You
know it's your last resort, but you know, too, that it's a rich one, and when
at last you're driven to use it, you'll enter another kind of world, more
complex and more engrossing than your own, just for the work it takes to get
from place to place and the mystery of the fog between the places. It's a
mind, another human mind, sharing this prison with you when at last you need
sharing more than anything whatever in all of space. Who is it?
You
think about that. You think a whole lot about that. Back at Base, in your last
year, you and the other cadets thought about that more than anything. If they'd
ever given you the shadow of a hint . . . but no; wondering about it was apparently
part of your training. You knew only that on your Long Haul, you would not be
alone. You had a pretty good idea that the choice of a shipmate for you would
be a surprise.
You
looked around you at mess, in class, in the dormitory; you lay awake at night
dealing out their faces in a sort of solitaire game; and sometimes you thought
about one and said, "That'd be fine. We'd get along." And sometimes
you said, "That stinker? Lock me up with him and that bulkhead won't be tough enough. I'll kill him after the third
day, so help me!"
And
after they tapped you for your first Haul, this was the only thing you were
scared about—who'd be your shipmate. Everything else, you thought you could
handle. You knew your job inside out and backward and it wouldn't whip you: You
were sharp-tuned, fine-honed, ready for anything that was under your own
control. You were even confident about being alone; it wouldn't get you. Not a
chance.
Away
down deep, no man believes he can be driven out of his mind, just as he cannot believe—really
believe—that he will be dead. That's the kind of thing that happens to someone
else.
But this business of a
shipmate—this wasn't under your control. You didn't control who it would be and
you wouldn't control the guy after blastoff. It was the only unknown and
therefore the only thing that scared you.
Amendment: there was a certain amount of
control. The intercom button was on your side of the bulkhead. Leave it alone
and you didn't have to so much as know you had a shipmate until you were good
and ready.
Being
able to shut off a voice isn't control, though. You don't know what your
shipmate will do. Or be.
In
those last tight days before blastoff, there was one thing you became
overwhelmingly aware of. Esprit de corps, they call it. You and the other graduates
were hammered into a mold—and hammered some more until the resiliency was gone
out of you. You were alike and you did things alike because you had grown to
want to. You knew for certain that one of this tight, trustworthy little group
would be picked for you; their training and yours, their whole lives and yours,
pointed toward this ship, this Haul.
Your
presence on this ship summed up your training; your training culminated in your
presence on the ship. Only a graduate cadet was fit to man the ship; the ship
existed solely for the graduate cadet. This was something so self-evident that
you never thought about it.
Not until now.
Because
now, a few minutes ago, you were ready to push that button. You couldn't know
if you'd broken all records for loneliness, for duration of solitary
confinement, but you'd tried. You'd looked through the viewport until it ceased
to mean anything. You'd read until you didn't care any more. You'd lived the
almost-life of the stereos until you couldn't make believe you believed them.
You'd listened to music until it didn't matter. And you'd gone over and over
your life from its very beginnings until you'd completely lost perspective on
it or anything and anyone in it.
You'd
found that you could go back to the viewport and cycle through the whole thing
again, but you'd done that, too, so often that the whole matrix of personal
involvement was emptied out. Then the flatness of the bulkhead made itself
felt. In a way, it seemed to bulge toward you, crowd you against the ship's
side, and you knew it was getting to be time you pushed that button and found
out for sure.
Who?
Pete or Krakow or that crazy redhead
Walkinok? Or Wendover (you all called him Bendover) with all those incomprehensible
shaggy-dog stories? Harris? Beerbelly Flacker or Cohen the Wire-haired Terror?
Or Shank (what you all called him was a shame)? Or Gindes, whose inexplicable
nickname was Mickey Mouse? You'd sort of hoped it would be Gindes, not because
you liked him, but more because he was the one classmate you'd never known very
well. He always used to look on and keep his mouth shut. He'd be much more fun
to explore than, say, old Shank, who was so predictable that you could
practically talk in chorus with him.
So
you've tortured yourself, just for the sake of torture, with your thumb over
the intercom button, until even the torture dried out and blew away.
You pushed.
You
found out, first of all, that the intercom apparently had its own amplifier,
energized when you held the button down, and that it took forever—well, three
or four seconds, anyway—to warm up. First nothing, then a carrier, then the
beginning of a signal; then, at last, the voice of your shipmate, rushing up to
full volume, as loud and as clear as if the bulkhead did not exist. And you get
off that button as if it had turned into a needle; and you're backed against
the outboard bulkhead, deep in shock, physically in silence, but with that
voice going on and on and on unbelievably in your unbelieving brain.
It was crying.
It
wept wearily, as though you had tuned in toward the end of a long session of
wild and lonesome grief. It cried quietly, exhaustedly, without hope. And it
cried in a voice that was joltingly wrong for this place—a light, high voice,
nearly a contralto. It was wrong, altogether wrong.
The wild ideas come first: Stowaway?
You
almost laugh. For days before blastoff, you were drugged and immersed in
high-frequency fields; hypnotized, worked and reworked mentally and physically.
You were passively fed and passively instructed.
You
don't know now and you may never know all they did to you. But you can be sure
it was done inside six concentric rings of "security" of one kind
and another, and you can be sure that your shipmate got the same. What it
amounted to was concentrated attention from
a mob of specialists, every sleeping and waking second from the time you beered
it up at the class farewell dinner to the time the accelerator tug lifted your
ship and carried it screaming up and outward. Nobody was in this ship but those
who belonged in it; that you can absolutely bank on.
Mad
idea, the second. For a while, you don't even dare think it, but with that kind
of voice, that crying, you have to think of something. So you do and you're
scared, scared in a way you've never imagined before, and to a degree you
didn't think was possible. There's a girl in there!
You run those wordless syllables, those tired
sobs, through your mind again, seeking for vocalizations as separated from the
breathy, painful gasping that accompanied them. And you don't know. You just
can't be certain.
So punch the button again. Listen some more.
Or ask.
But you can't. The crazy idea might be true
and you couldn't stand that. They couldn't—they just couldn't— put a girl on
these ships with you and then stow her behind the bulkhead.
Then
you have an instant fantasy about that. You kneel (bumping your skull on the
cover) and feel frantically around the bulkhead, where it meets deck-plates,
nose compartment, overhead, after-bulkhead; and all around your fingers ride
the bead of a weld. You sit back, sweating a little and half-laughing at
yourself. Scratch off one fantasy; there'll be no sliding partitions into any
harems this trip.
You
stop laughing and think. "They couldn't be that cruel!" You're on a test run, sure, and it isn't the
ship that's being tested. You know that and you accept it. But tests, tests ... must you throw a glass vase on a brick
sidewalk to find out if it's brittle? You see one of your own hands going up
and out to check for a panel, a joint again. You sneer at it, at your own hand,
and watch it stop in embarrassment.
Well,
say they weren't that cruel. Whom did they put in there?
Not
Walkinok. Not Shank. Not Harris or Cohen or any cadet. A cadet wouldn't lie
there and cry like that, like a
child, a schoolgirl—a baby. Some stranger,
then.
Now
the anger comes, shouldering out all the fear. They wouldn't! This ship is
everything a cadet was born for— no, made for. That tight leash that bound you
with the others, all your thinking, an easy thing you all shared and never had
to think about—that was a thing that didn't admit strangers.
Aside
from that—beyond that—this wasn't a matter of desecrated esprit; it was a matter of moral justice. Nobody but
a cadet deserves
a ship! What did you give
your life to and what for? Why did you give up marriage, and freedom, and all
the wonderful trivialities called "fun" that made most human lives
worth living? Why did you hold still for Base routines and the hazing you got
from the upper classmen?
Just
to have some stranger, someone who wasn't even a cadet, wander in without
training, shaping, conditioning, experience ...
and get on your ship?
No, it has to be a cadet.
It couldn't be anything else. Even a cadet who could break down and cry—that's
a more acceptable idea than its being a woman or a stranger.
You're still angry, but now it's the kind of
anger that goads you, not the kind that stops you. You push the button. You
hear the carrier, then the beginnings of something else . . . Breathing.
Difficult, broken breathing, the sound of someone too tired to cry any more,
even when crying has changed nothing and there are still more tears to come.
"What the hell are you bawling about?" you yell.
The breathing goes on and on. Finally it
stops for a moment and then a long, whispery, shuddery sigh.
"Hey!" you shout. "Hey—you in there!"
But there is no answer. The breathing is
fainter, more regular. Whoever it is is going to sleep.
You press even harder on the button, as if
that would do any good, and you yell again, this time not even "Hey!"
but a blunter, angrier syllable. You can think only that your shipmate chooses—chooses, by God!—not to answer you.
You're
breathing hard now, but your shipmate isn't.
You hold your breath and listen. You hear the
deep, quiet inhalations, and then a small catch, and a little sigh, the ghost
of half a sob.
"Hey!"
Nothing.
You
let the button go and in the sharp silence that replaces the carrier's faint
hum, the same wordless syllable builds and builds inside you until it bursts
free again. You can tell from the feel of your throat and the ringing in your
ears that it's been a long, long time since you used your voice.
You're
angry and you're hurt from these insults to yourself and to your Service. And
you know what? You feel good. Some of the stereos you have are pretty nice;
they take you right into battle, into the arms of beautiful women, into danger,
and from time to time you could get angry at someone in them. You could—but you
haven't for a long time now. You haven't laughed or been angry ever since . . .
since . . . well, you can't even remember when. You'd forgotten how and you'd
forgotten just when it was you forgot. And now look. The heart's going, the
sweat...
This is fine.
Push the button again, take another little
sip of anger. It's been aging; it's vintage stuff. Go ahead.
You do, and up comes the
carrier.
"Please,"
begs the voice. "Please, please . . . say something else."
Your tongue is paralyzed and you choke,
suddenly, *vhen you swallow wrong. You cough violently, let go the button and
pound yourself on the chest. For a moment, you're in bad shape. Coughing makes
your thinking go in spurts, and your thinking is bouncing up and down on the
idea that, until now, you didn't really believe there was anyone in there at
all. You get your wind and push the button again.
The voice asks, "Are
you all right? On I do anything?"
You
become certain of something eias>. that isn't a voice you recognize. If you ever heard it before, you
certainly don't remember it. Then the content of it hits you. Can 1 do
anything? You
get mad again.
"Yeah,"
you growl. "Hand me a glass of water." You don't have your thumb on
the button, so you just say what pops into your mind. You shake yourself like a
wet bird dog, take a deep breath, and lean on the control again.
Before
you can open your mouth, you're in a hailstorm of hysterical laughter.
"Glass of water . . . uh-uh-uh . . . that's good . . . you don't know what
this means," says the voice, suddenly sober and plaintive. "I've
waited so long. I've listened to your music and the sound from your stereos.
You never talk, you never say anything at all. I never even heard you cough
before."
Part
of your mind reacts to that: Thafs unnatural, not even to cough, or laugh aloud, or hum. Must be a
conditioning. But
most of it explodes at this stranger, this— intruder, talking away like that
without a word of explanation, of apology . . . talking as if that voice of
all voices had a right to be there.
"I
was beginning to think you were deaf and dumb. Or maybe even that you weren't
there at all. That was the thing that scared me the most."
"Shut
up," you hiss, with all the fury, all the deadly warning you can command.
"I
knew they wouldn't," the voice continues happily. "They'd never put
anyone out here by himself. That would be too—" It stops abruptiy as you
release the button.
"My
God!" you think. "The dam has boist! That char-acter'll chunter along
like that for the duration!"
You
press the button quickly, hear "—all alone out here, you get scared to
look out the viewp—" and you cut off again.
That
stuff like an invisible mist you see melting away is all the conjecture, those
great half-formed plans of shipping out with Walkinok or the Wirehaired
Terror.
You
were going to review your courses, remember? Slow and easy—take a week on
spatial ballistics or spectroscopy. Think it all through for a day between
sentences. Or laugh over the time you and the Shank got tanked up at the canteen
and pretended you were going to tie up the CO. and jet him off with Colonel
Provost, the head PD man, for a shipmate. The General would get all the
psychodynamics he needed. The General was always talking psychodynamics,
Provost was always doing psychodynamics.
Well,
it seemed funny at the time, anyway. It wasn't so much the beer. It was knowing
the General and knowing Colonel Provost that made it funny. How funny would it
be with a stranger?
They
give you someone to talk to. They give you someone you haven't anything to
talk to aboutl
That idea of putting a girl
behind the bulkhead, now, that was a horrible idea. It was torture. Well, so's
this. Maybe worse.
A
thought keeps knocking and you finally back off and let it in. Something to do
with the button. You push it and you can hear your shipmate. You release it and
. . . shut off the intercom?
No,
by the Lord, you don't! When you were coughing, you were off that button. Can I do
anything?
Now
what the hell kind of business is this? (And that detached part of your mind
reaches hungrily for the pulses of fury: ah, it feels good!) Do you mean to sit
there and tell me (you rage silently at the PD men who designed this ship) that
even if I don't push that button, my shipmate can hear everything that goes on
with me? The intercom's open on the other side all the time, open on this side
only when I push the button—is that it?
You
turn and glare out the viewport, staring down the cold, distant eye of
infinity, and Where
the hell, you
storm silently, is
my privacy?
This
won't do. It won't do at all. You figured right from the start that you and
your shipmate would be pretty equal, but on a ship, even a little two-passenger
can like this, someone's got to be in command. Given that the other compartment
has the same stereos, the same dispensers, the same food and water and
everything else, and the only difference between these living quarters is that
button— who's privileged? Me, because I get to push the button? Or my shipmate,
who gets to listen in on me when I so much as cough?
"I know!" you think suddenly.
"That's a PD operative in there! A psychodynamics specialist assigned to
observe me!"
You almost laugh out loud;
relief washes over you. PD work is'naturally hush-hush. You'll never know how
many hours during your course you were under hypnosis. It was even rumored
around that some guys had cerebral surgery done by the PD boys and never knew
it. The boys had to work in secret for the same reason you don't stir your
coffee with an ink-stick—PD is one field where the tools must leave no mark.
Well,
fine, fine. At last this shipmate makes some sense: at last you've got an
answer you can accept. This ship, this trip, is of and for a cadet—but it's PD
business. The only non-cadet who'd conceivably be aboard would have to be a PD tech.
So
you grin and reach for the button. Then, remembering the way it works, that
the intercom's open from your side when you're off the button, you draw your hand
back, face the bulkhead, and say easily, "Okay, PD, I'm on to you. How'm I
doing?" You wonder how many cadets tumble to the trick this soon. You push
the button and wait for the answer.
The
answer is "Huh?" in a mixture
of shyness and mystification.
You
let go the button and laugh. "No sense stringing it out, Lieutenant."
(This is clever. Most PD techs are looeys; one or two are master sergeants.
Right or not, you haven't hurt his feelings.) "I know you're a PD
man."
There's
a silence from the other side. Then: "What's a PD man?"
You
get a little sore. "Now see here, Lieutenant,
you don't have to play any more of these psych games." "Gosh, I'm no
lieutenant. I—" You cut him off quickly. "Sergeant, then."
"You got me all wrong," says that damnable high voice. "Well,
you're PD, anyway." "I'm afraid I'm not."
You
can't take much more of this. "Then what the hell are you?"
A
silence. And as it beats by, that anger and that fear of torture begin to
mount, hand in hand. "Well?" you roar.
"Well,"
says the voice, and you can practically see it shuffle its feet. "I'm not
anything. I'm fifteen years old . . ."
You
drag out your senior-class snap; there's a way of talking to fourth and third
classmen that makes 'em jump.
"Mister, you give an account of
yourself, but now. What's your name?" "Skampi."
"Skampi? What the hell kind of a name is
that?" "It's what they call me."
Did you detect a whisper of defiance there? "Sir!" The defiance disappears instantly. "It's
what they call me ... sir."
"And what are you doing on my ship, mister?" A frightened
gulp. "I—I'm sorry—uh—sir. They put me on." "They?"
"At the Base... sir," he amended quickly.
"You
were on the Base just how long, mister?" That "mister" can be a
lead-shot whiplash if you do it right. It was sure being done right.
"I
don't know, sir." You have the feeling the punk's going to burst into
tears again. "They took me to a big laboratory and there were a lot of
sort of booths with machines in them. They asked me all kinds of questions about
did I want to be a spaceman. Well, I did. I always did, ever since I was a kid.
So, after a while, they put me on a table and gave me a shot and when I woke
up, I was here."
"Who gave you a shot? What was his
name?"
"I
never ... I didn't find out, sir."
A pause. "A big man. Old. He had gray hair, very short, and green
eyes."
Provost,
by God. This is PD business, all right, but from where you sit, it's monkey
business.
"You know any spatial ballistics?"
"No, sir. Some day, I—"
"Astrogation?"
"Only what I picked up myself. But I'll—" "Gravity
mechanics? Differentials? Strength of materials? Light-metal fission?
Relativity?"
"Well? Well? Speak up, mister!" "I heard of them, sir."
" 'I heard of them, sir!'" you
mimic savagely. "Do you know what this ship is for?"
"Oh, yes, sir! Everybody knows that.
This is the Long Haul. When you come back from this, you get your commission
and they give you a starshipJ" And if the voice had shuffled its feet
once, now its eyes shone.
"You figure to get a starship,
mister?"
"Well, I—I—"
"You think they give commands to Boy
Scouts just because the Boy Scout wants to go to space awful bad?" No answer.
You
jeer, "Have you got the slightest idea how much training a cadet has to go
through, how much he has to learn?"
"Well, no, but I guess I will." "Sir!"
"Sir.
They put me aboard, all those officers who asked me the questions and
everything. It must be all right. Hey!" he
says excitedly, all the crushed timidity disappearing, to be replaced by a
bubbling enthusiasm. "I
knowl We have all this time
. . . maybe you're supposed to teach me astrogation and relativity and all
that."
Your
jaw drops at the sheer childishness of it. And then something really ugly
drifts up and smothers everything else.
For some reason, your mind flashes back to
the bus, the day you got to Base. You can remember back easily to all the faces
you worked with, those who made it and those who didn't. But your class had
thirty-eight cadets in it and that bus must have held fifty. What happened to the
rest? You'd always assumed they went into other sections— ground crew, computer
men, maintenance. Suppose they'd been sorted out, examined for some special
trait or talent that only the PD men knew about? Suppose they were loaded right
aboard ships, each with a graduate cadet?
And why?
Suppose
these punks, greenhorns, Boy Scouts, children —suppose
they were the ones slated for a commission? Suppose guys like you, thinking all
this while you were the cream of the crop, and the top cream off that—suppose
all along you'd tested out as second-grade material. Suppose you were the one
who did the sweating and cramming and took the hazing and the demerits and the
lousy mess-hall food, not to command a starship, not to get a commission, but
just to be a private tutor to a boy genius who wanted to go to space awful bad?
This
wouldn't make sense anywhere else but in the star-ship service. It barely made
sense there, but look:
A
starship commander might make two trips in his whole career, that's all. Eighteen
years each round trip, with his passengers in coldpacks and a cargo of serums,
refractories, machine tools and food concentrate for the xenologists and
mineralogists who were crazy enough to work out there.
Training
the commander for such a ship was easy, as far as operating knowledge was
concerned, though there was a powerful lot of it. But training him to stay
conscious, awake and aware—and alone—for all those years was something else
again. Few men like that were born; they had to be made.
Most
of your recluses, your hermits, all through history, have been guys who had
things drastically wrong with them. There couldn't be anything wrong with a
starship commander. He had to be captain and deck crew, and know his black-hole
as well (though most of the drive machinery down there was automatic) and stay
alert—stay sane—in a black, mad, weightless emptiness God
never made him for.
Give him more books and
pictures, games and music than even he would have time for and you'd still not
be sure he'd stay sane unless he had some very special inner resources.
These (and one other thing) were what a cadet
was screened for and what he was trained in. PD packed him full of technical
knowledge, psyched him to a fare-thee-well, and when they figured he was
machine-finished and carrying a high gloss, they sealed him in a space can and
threw it out for the Long Haul.
The course was pre-set, and
it might last 14 months, and it might last three years, and after a guy got
back (if he got back), he would be fit to take out a starship or he would not.
As for the shipmate—well, you'd always assumed that PD was looking for a way to
shake down two guys at once so they could be together on a starship.
Maybe,
some day, the ships would carry eight, ten at once, and at last natural human
gregariousness would have a chance to compete with the pall of black distances.
So far, though, psychic disorientation had made everything that was latently
mean and murderous in a man explode into action. Putting more than a single
human being on those boats to nurse them through was just asking for slaughter.
And shipwreck.
The
other thing required of you besides technical ability and these inner
resources is—youth. You're only twenty-two, so full of high-intensity training
that, as Walkinok once said, you feel your brain convolutions are blown out
smooth like a full bladder. And you've compacted this knowledge, coded it, used
it. You're so full of it that it's bound to ooze out onto anyone around you.
You're
twenty-two and you're sealed up in a can with a thirsty-headed fifteen-year-old
who knows nothing, but wants to go to the stars awful bad. And you can forget how stupid he seems to be, too, because you can
bet your bulging cortex that the kid has such an enormous I.Q. that he can
afford to act stupid and cry.
What
a dirty, rotten, lousy deal to put you through all this just to shave seven
years off the age of a starship commander! Next thing you know, they'd put a
diapered baby in with a work-weary sucker of a fine-honed cadet and get three
star trips out of him instead of two!
And
what's to become of you?
After you've done your
generous stint of tutoring, they pin a discharge emblem on your tunic and say,
"Well done, Cadet. Now go raise Brussels sprouts." And you stand at
attention and salute the downy-cheeked squirt in all the gold braid and watch
him ride the gantry crane to the control cabin you've aimed at and sweated for
ever since you were weaned!
You
sprawl there in that living space, so small that you can't stand up in it, and
you look at that bland belly of a bulkhead with its smooth, round navel of a
button, and you think, "Well, there's a lot of guts back of that."
You heave a deep breath, while still the detached part of your mind looks on.
Now it's saying wonderingly, "Aren't you the guy who was scared because
nothing could get him excited any more?" And you speak and your voice
comes out sounding quite different from anything you've ever heard from anyone
before. Maybe you've never been this mad before.
"Who
told you to say that?"
You push the button and listen. "Say
what—uh—sir?"
"About me teaching you. Anybody at
Base?"
He seems to be thinking. "Why, no, sir.
I just thought it would be a good idea."
You don't say anything. You just hold the
button down.
He says diffidently, "Sort of pass the
time?" When you still don't say anything, he adds wistfully, "I'd
try. I'd try awful hard."
You let go the button and
growl, "I just bet you would. You just thought it up all your own little
self, huh?" "Well, yes."
"You're a bright boy. You're a real,
smart, ambitious little louse!"
You push the button real quick, but all you
get is an astonished silence.
You say, real composed, almost gentle,
"That 'louse,' now, that's not just a figure of speech, little boy. I mean
that. I mean you're a crummy little crawler looking to suck blood after
somebody else has done all the work. You know what you do? You just make like
you're all alone in this can. You don't talk to me and you don't listen to me
and I'll do you a favor—I'll forget all about you, too. I'm not going to bat
your eyeballs together just yet, but don't call me generous, little boy—never
that. It's just that I can't reach in there just now."
"No!" That boy can make a real
piteous noise when he wants to. "No, no! Wait—please!"
"Well?"
"I don't under—I mean I'm sorry, Cadet
I'm honest-tc-Pete sorry. I never meant—"
But you cut him off. You lie back and close
your eyes. You're thrumming with fury right down to your toenails.
This, says your internal observer, is all
right. This is living.
So the weeks pass, and so
do more weeks. You shoot a star and make some notes, and wait a while and shoot it again, and
pretty soon you have enough data to fool around with. You get your stylus and
block, and the point darts around the way you want it to, and those old figures
sit up and lie down and rush around just the way you want them to. You laugh
when you do it; wouldn't Junior just love to learn some of these tricks?
Anyway, you figure you're just past the cusp
perihelion of your parabola and you're starting back. You know how far you've
come and when you'll get back. You laugh again. The sound of your voice reminds
you he can hear you, so you crawl over to the bulkhead and push the button.
"Cadet," he says. "Please,
Cadet. Please." His voice is hoarse and weak; the syllables come out as if
they're meaningless from repetition. He's probably been lying in there for
weeks bleating "Cadet—please—Cadet—please" every time you clicked the
stylus against your teeth or set the quadrant on your Sun gun.
You spend a lot of time looking out the
viewport, but you get sick of that and turn to the euphorics. You see a lot of
stereo shows. You are always aware of the button in the bulkhead, but you
ignore it. You read. You get a lot of use out of the octant; it seems you take
a lot more bearings than you have to. And when at last the button starts to be
intrusive, you make a real effort and leave it alone; you figure out something
else to do instead.
You take a careful survey of your instruments
to figure which one you need least, and finally decide on the airspeed indicator.
You've spent plenty of time in a mockup and you know you can compute your
airspeed when you return to Earth by the hull-temperature plus your ground-rise
radar.
You dismount the instrument and take it apart
and get the diamond bearing. You go through the games locker and the equipment
chest until you put together a nickel rod and a coil, and you hook on to your
short-range radio where the oscillations suit you. You cement the diamond to
the tip of the rod, shove the rod through the long axis of the coil. You turn
on the juice and feel (rather than hear) the rod humming softly.
"The phenomenon, dear pupil," you
say, but silently, "is magneto-striction,
whereby the nickel rod contracts slightly in the magnetic field. And since the
field is in oscillation, that diamond on the tip is vibrating like
crazy."
You
get your stylus and, after careful consideration, decide on a triangle'with
round corners, just big enough to shove an arm through comfortably; the three
corners would make peepholes.
All
the while, you have quick fantasies about it. You'll knock the triangular piece
out of the bulkhead and stick your face in the hole and say "Surprise!" and he'll be cowering there, wondering what
goes on. And you'll say "Shake and let bygones be." And he'll jump
over, all eager, and you'll take his hand and drag it through the hole and put
your back against the bulkhead and pull till his shoulder dislocates.
He's
gasping, "Cadet, please," until you get tired of amusing yourself and
haul the wrist around and sink your teeth in it. Then he starts to bleed, and
you just hold him there while "Cadet-please" gets fainter and
fainter, and you explain to him all about differential equations and
mass-ratios.
And
as you're thinking about this, you're going round and round the blunted
triangle with your vibrating diamond. The bulkhead is thick as hell and
tough—it's hull-metal; imagine that, for an inboard bulkhead!—but that's all
right. You've got plenty of time. And bit by bit, your scored line goes deeper.
Every
once in a while, you take a breather. It occurs to you to wonder what you'll
say when you're grappled in and the Colonel sees that hole in the bulkhead. You
try not to wonder about this, but you do all the same, a whole lot. You run it
over in your mind and sometimes the Colonel says, "Good, Cadet. That's
real resourcefulness, the kind I like to see." But other times it doesn't
quite come out that way, especially with the kid dead on one side of the
bulkhead and his blood all over the place on the other side.
So
maybe you won't kill him. You'll just scare him. Have fun with him.
Maybe
he'll talk, too. Maybe this entire Long Haul was set up by PD just to find out
if you'd cooperate with your shipmate, try to teach him what you know, at any
cost. And you know, if you thought more of the Service than you do about your
own dirty career in it, that's just what you'd do. Maybe if you did that,
they'd give you a star-ship, you and the kid both.
So,
anyway, this cutting job is long and slow and suits you fine; no matter what
you think, you go on with it, just because you started. When it's finished
you'll know what to do.
Funny
that the result of this trip was going to be the same as some of those you'd
heard whispered about, where a ship came in with one guy dead and the other . .
.
But
that was the difference. To do a thing like that, those guys must have been
space-happy. You're doing it, sure, but for different reasons. You're no raving
looney. You're slow-and-steady, doing a job, knowing exactly why.
Or
you will, when the time comes. You're real happy this whole time. Then all that
changes.
Just why, you can't know. You turned in and
you slept, and all of a sudden you're wide awake. You're thinking about some lab
work you did. It was a demonstration of eddy-current effects.
There
was a copper disk as thick as your arm and a meter in diameter, swinging from a
rope in the center of the gymnasium. You hauled it up to the high ceiling at
the far end and turned it loose. There was a big electromagnet set up in the
middle of the place, and as the disk reached the bottom of its long swing, it
passed between the poles of the magnet, going like hell. You threw the switch
and the disk stopped dead right where it was and rang like a big gong, though
nothing had touched it.
Then
you remember the sixty zillion measurements you'd taken off a synchro-cosmotron
so huge that it took you four minutes at a fast walk to get from one end to the
other.
You
remember the mockups, the hours and hours of hi-G, no-G; one instrument out,
another, all of 'em, some of 'em; simulated meteorites on collision orbit; manual
landing techniques—until your brains were in your hands and the seat of your
pants, and you did the right things with them without thinking. Exhausted, you
still did it right. Even doped up.
You remember the trips into town with Harris
and Flacker and the others. Something happened to you every time you so much as
walked down a street with those guys. It was a thing you'd never told anyone.
Part of it was something that happened between the townspeople and your group.
Part of it was between your group and yourself. It all added up to being a
little different and a little better . . . but not in a cocky way. In a way
that made you grateful to the long, heavy bulk of a starship and what such
ships are for.
You sit up in your bunk, with that mixed-up,
wideawake feeling, reaching for something you can't quite understand, some
one simple thing that would sum up the huge equipment, the thousands of
measurements, the hours of cramming and the suspense of examinations; the
seat-of-the-pants skills and the pride in town . . .
And now you see what it is.
That kid in there, he could have an I.Q. of
nine goddam hundred and never learn how to put down a ship with all his
instruments out and the gyros on manual. Not by somebody telling him over an
intercom when he's never even sat in a G-seat. He might memorize twelve
thousand slightly varying measurements off a linear accelerator, but he wouldn't
gain that certain important thing you get when you make those measurements
yourself. You could describe the way the copper disk rang when the eddy current
stopped it, but he would have to see it happen before it did to him all
the things it did to you.
You still don't know who
that kid is or why he's here, but you can bet on one thing—he isn't here to
pick your brains and take your job. You don't have to like him and you can be
mad he's aboard instead of Harris or Walky; but get that junk out of your head
right now about him being a menace to you. Goddlemighty Godfrey, where did that
poisonous little crumb in your brain come from? Since when are you subject to
fear and jealousy and insecurity? Since when do you have to guard yourself
against your own imagination?
Come the hell off it, Cadet. You're not that
good a teacher; he's not that much of a monster.
Monster! Did you hear him
cry that time?
You feel twenty pounds lighter (which is odd,
seeing that you're still in free-fall) and as if you'd just washed your face.
"Hey, Krampi!"
You
go push the button and wait. Then you hear a sharp inhalation through nostrils.
A sniff . . . no, you won't call it that.
"Skampi, sir," he
corrects you timidly.
"Okay, whatever you
say. And knock off that 'sir.'"
"Yes, sir. I mean
yes."
"What were you crying
about?"
"When, s—?"
"Okay,"
you break in gently. "You don't have to talk about it."
"No.
I wasn't trying to deny it. I . . . cried twice. I'm sorry you heard me. You
must think ..."
"I don't think,"
you say sincerely. "Not enough."
He
thinks that over and apparently drops it. "I cried right after
blastoff."
"Scared?"
"No . . . yes, I was,
but that wasn't why. I just. . ."
"Take
your time telling-me. Time is what we got nothing else but of."
"It
was just that I—I'd always wanted to be in space. I thought about it in the
daytime and dreamed about it at night. And all of a sudden, there it was,
happening to me for real. I . . . thought I ought to say something and I opened
my mouth to do it and all of a sudden I was crying. I couldn't help it. I guess
I— Crazy, I guess."
"I
wouldn't say so. You can hear and talk and see pictures and get yourself all
ready, but there's nothing like doing it. / know."
"You, you're used to
it."
He seems to want to say
something else; you hold the button down. Finally, with difficulty, he asks,
"You're big, aren't you? I mean you're . . . you know. Big."
"Well, yes."
"I wish I was. I wish I was good for .. . well, something."
"Everybody push you around?"
"Mm."
"Listen," you
say. "You take a human being and put him down next to a starship. They're
not the same size and they're not the same shape, and one of 'em's pretty
insignificant. But you can say that this built
this, not the other way around."
"Y-e-eah." It is
a whisper.
"Well, you're that human being, that
self-same one. Ever think of that?" "No."
"Neither
did I, till now," you admit rapidly. "It's the truth, though."
He says, "I wish I was
a cadet."
"Where do you come
from, kid?"
"Masolo.
It's no place. Jerk town. I like big places with big things going on. Like the
Base."
"Awful lot of people
charging around."
"Yeah,"
he says. "I don't like crowds much, but the Base —it's worth it."
You
sit and look at the bulkhead. It's companionable, suddenly, and sort of
changed, as if it had just grown warm, or quilted. You get a splinter of light
off the bright metal where you've scored it. You think it's down pretty deep. A
man could stand up to it and knock that piece out with a maul, if a man could
stand up, if he had a maul.
You
say, very fast, as if you're afraid something's going to stop you, "Ever
do anything you were really ashamed of? I did when I talked to you the way I
did. I shouldn't've done it like that ...
I don't know what got into me. Yes, I do and I'll tell you. I was afraid you
were a boy genius planted on me to strip my brains and take my command. I got
scared."
It
all comes out like that. You feel much better and at the same time you're glad
Walkinok or Shank aren't around to hear you spout like that.
The
kid's very quiet for a while. Then he says, "One time my mother sent me to
the market and something was a special, I forget what. But anyway I had forty
cents change and I forgot about it. I found it in my pants in school next day
and bought a starship magazine with it and never told her. I used to get every
issue that way after that. She never missed the money. Or maybe she did and
didn't say anything. We were pretty hard up."
You
understand that the kid is trying to give you something, because you
apologized to hrm. You don't say anything more about that. Right here, a
wonder starts to grow. You don't know what it is, but you know that standoff-and-watch
part of your mind is working on it. You say, "Where is this Masolo?"
"Upstate.
Not far from Base. Ever since I was a baby, the axi-tugs were shaking the house
when they took off. There's a big tree outside the house and all the leaves
shiver—with the tugs, you know. I used to climb out a limb and get on the roof
and lie down on my back. Sometimes you could see the starships orbiting. Just
after the Sun goes down, sometimes you can . . ." He swallows; you can
hear it plainly. "I used to put out my hand. It was like a firefly up
there."
"Some firefly,"
you say.
"Yeah. Some firefly,
all right."
Inside
you, the wonder is turning to a large and luminous astonishment. It's still.
inexpressible, so you leave it alone.
The
kid is saying, "I was with two other fellows out by the high school one
time. I was just a kid—eleven, I think. Well, some gorillas from the high
school chased us. We ran and they caught up with us. The other kids started to
fight them. I got over to one side and, when I had a chance, I ran. I ran all
the way home. I wish I'd stayed there with those other two kids.
"They
got the tar kicked out of them and I guess it hurt, but I guess it stopped
hurting after some teacher came along and broke up the fight. But I hurt every
time I think about running away like that. Boy, did those two give me a razzing
when they saw me next day! Boy! So
what I wanted to ask you, you don't think a kid who would run away like that
could be a cadet."
He ends it like that, flat.
No question.
You think about it. You've been in some fine
brawls as a cadet. You're in a bar and someone cracks wise, and your blood
bubbles up, and you wade in, feeling giant-size. But maybe that's just because
of the business of belonging.
You
say carefully, "I think if I was in a fight, I'd rather have a guy on my side
who knew what being scared felt like. Then it would be like having two guys on
my side, instead of one. One of the guys wouldn't care if he got hurt and the
other guy would never want to be hurt that way again. I think a fellow like
that would be a pretty good cadet."
"Well, yeah,"
says the kid, in that funny whisper.
Now
the inner astonishment bursts into sight and you recognize what it is about
this kid.
At
first, you were scared of him, but even when that went away, you didn't like
him. There was no question of liking him or not liking him; he was a different
species that you couldn't have anything to do with.
And
the more you talked with him, the more you began to feel that you didn't have
to set yourself apart from him, that he had a whole lot you didn't have—and
that you could use it. The way he talked, honest and unabashed; you don't know
how to do that. You nearly choked to death apologizing to him.
It
suddenly is very important to get along with this kid. It isn't because the kid
is important. It's because if you can get along with somebody so weak, so wet
behind the ears, and yet in his peculiar way so rich, why you can get along
with anybody, even your own lousy self.
And you realize that this thing of getting
along with him has extension after extension. Somehow, if you can find more
ways to get along with this kid, if you can see more things the way he sees
them with no intolerance and no altitude, you'll tap something in yourself
that's been dried up a long time now.
You
find all this pretty amazing, and you settle down and talk to the kid. You
don't eke it out. You know he'll last all the way back to Base and have plenty
left over. You know, too, that by the time you get there, this kid will know a
cadet can also be a louse. You can give him that much.
The
way you treated him, he was hurt. But you know? He wasn't mad. He doesn't think
he's good enough to get mad at a cadet. He thinks a cadet rates what he does
just by being a cadet.
Well, you are going to fix that
The time goes by and the time comes; the
acceleration tug reaches out and grabs you high above Earth, so, after all that
manual-control drill, you don't have a thing to do but sit there and ride it
down.
The
tug hovers over the compound right near the administration building, which
disappears in a cloud of yellow dust. You sink down and down in the dust cloud
until you think they must be lowering you into a hole in the ground. Then, at
last, there's a slight thump and an inhuman amount of racket as the tug blasts
away free.
After
that, there's only the faint whisper of the air circulator, the settling dust,
and a profoundly unpleasant feeling in calves and chest as the blood gets used
to circulating in a 1-G environment.
"Now
don't you forget, Skampi," you say. You find it difficult to talk; you've
got a wide grin plastered across your face and you can't cast it adrift.
"Just as soon as they're through with you, you come looking for me, hear?
I'll buy you a soda."
You
lean back in your G-chair and hold the bulkhead button.
"I can drink
beer," he says manfully.
"We'll
compromise. We'll make your soda with beer. Listen, kid, I can't promise, but I
know they're fooling with the idea of a two-man crew for starships. How'd you
like to go with me—one trip, anyhow? Of course, you'll have to be conditioned
six ways from the middle, double-time, and it'll be real rough. But—what do you
say?"
And you know? He doesn't say anything!
He laughs, though.
Now here comes Colonel
Provost, the big big brass of Psychodynamics, and a young M.P.
That's all the welcoming committee you'll get. The compound's walled and
locked, and no windows look out on it. They must have unloaded some pretty
sorry objects from these space cans from time to time.
They open the hatch from the outside and you
immediately start coughing like hell. Your eyes say the dust has settled, but
your lungs say no. By the time you have your eyes wiped, the M.P. is inside and
squatting on the deck, cross-legged.
He
says cheerfully, "Hi, kay-dee. This here's a stun gun and if you so much
as squint at me or the Colonel, you get flaked out like a heaving-line."
"Don't
worry about me," you say from behind that silly grin. "I got no
quarrel with anybody and I like it here. Good morning; Colonel."
"Look
out for this one," said the M.P. "Likes it here. He's sick."
"Shut
up, wheelhead," says the Colonel cheerfully. He has his gray crewcut and
barrel torso shoved into the hatch and it's real crowded in that little cabin.
"Well, Cadet, how are we?"
"We're
fine," you say. The M.P. cocks his head a little to one side and gets
bright-eyed. He thinks you're sassing the CO., but you're not. When you say
"we," you mean you and your shipmate.
"Anything special happen?"
The
answer to that is a big fat yes, but it would take forever to tell. It's all
recorded, anyway; PD doesn't miss a trick. But that's from then till now, and
done with. You're concerned from now on. "Colonel, I want to talk to you
right now. It's about my shipmate."
.
The Colonel leans a little further in and slaps the M.P.'s gun hand. He's in
front of the guy, so you can't see his face. "Beat it, wheelhead."
The M.P. clears out. You stagger up out of
the G-seat and climb through the hatch. The Colonel catches your arms as you
stagger. After a long time in free-fall, your knees won't lock as you walk; you
have to stiffen each one as your weight comes on it, and you have to
concentrate. So you concentrate, but that doesn't stop you from talking. You skim
over the whole business, from your long solo to being reduced to meeting your
shipmate, and the hassel you had with yourself over that, and then this thing
that happened with the kid—weeks and weeks of it, and you've only just begun.
"You can pick 'em, sir," you pant
as you lurch along. "Do you always use a little know-nothing kid? Where do
you find 'em? Does it always work out this well?"
"We get a commander
out of every Long Haul," he says.
"Say, that's great, sir!"
"We don't have very many ships," he
says, just as cheerfully.
"Oh," you say.
Suddenly you stop. "Wait, sir! What
about Skampi? He's still locked in on his side of the bulkhead."
"You
first," says the Colonel. You go on into the PD lab. "Up you
go."
You
look at the big chair with its straps and electrodes and big metal hood.
"You
know, they used chairs like these in the French Revolution," you say,
showing off. You're just busting with friendliness today. You never felt like this. You sit in the big chair. "Look, sir, I want to get
started on a project right away. This kid, now—I tell you, he's got a lot on
the ball. He's spaceman right to the marrow bones. He comes from right around
here, that little place up the pike, Ma-solo. He got shook out of his bassinet
by the axi-tugs. He spent his childhood lying on his back on the roof looking
for the starships in orbit. He's—"
"You
talk all the time," the Colonel breaks in mildly. "Sum up, will you?
You made out with your shipmate. You think you could do it again in a
starship. That it?"
"Think
we can try it? Hey, really? Look, can I be the one to tell him, Colonel?"
"Close your mouth and
sit still."
Those
are orders. You sit still. The Colonel gets you strapped in and connected up.
He puts his hand on the switch.
"Where did you say you
came from?"
You
didn't say, and you don't, because the hood swings down and you're surrounded
by a sudden dissonant chord of audio at tremendous amplitude. If you had been
allowed to say, though, you wouldn't have known.
The Colonel doesn't even give you time to be
surprised at this. You sink into blackness.
It gets light again. You
have no idea how much time has passed, but it must be plenty, because, the
sunlight from outside is a different color and slants in a different way through
the Venetian blinds. On a bench nearby is a stack of
minicans with your case number painted on each one— that'd be the tape record
of your Long Haul. There's some stuff in there you're not proud of, but you
wouldn't swap the whole story for anything.
"Hello,
Colonel," you say with your tongue thick.
"You with us again? Good." He looks
at an enlarged filmstrip and back at you. He shows you. It's a picture of the
bulkhead with the triangular score in it. "Magnetostriction vibrator,
with a diamond bearing for a drill bit, hm? Not bad. You guys scare me. I'd
have sworn that bulkhead couldn't be cut and that there was nothing in the
ship that could cut it. You must've been real eager."
"I wanted to kill him. You know that
now," you say happily.
"You
damn near did."
"Aw, now, Colonel! I wouldn't have gone
through with it."
"Come
on," he says, opening the buckles. "Where, sir?"
"To your space can. Wouldn't you like to
have a look at it from the outside?"
"Cadets
aren't permitted—"
"You
qualify," says the old man shortly.
So out you go to the compound. The can still
stands where it was landed.
"Where's
Skampi?" you ask worriedly.
The Colonel just passes you an odd look and
walks on. You follow him up to the can. "Here, around the front."
You walk around to the bow and look up at it.
It's just the shape it ought to be from the way it looked from inside, except
that it looks a little like a picture of a whale caught winking at you.
Winking?
One-eyed!
"Do you mean to tell
me you had that kid in a blind compartment, without so much as a
viewport?" you rage.
The Colonel pushes you. "Sit down. Over
there. On the hatch. You returning heroes and your manic moods . . . sit down!"
You
sit on the edge of the open hatch.
"Sometimes they fall over when I
explain," he says gruffly. "Now what was bothering you?"
"Locking
that kid up in a dark—"
"There isn't a kid. There isn't a dark
cabin. There's no viewport on that side of the can. It's a hydrazine
tank." "But I—but we—but the—" "Where do you come
from?" "Masolo, but what's that to—"
"What
did your mother and all the kids call you when you were a space-struck
teener?" "Scampy. They all—Scampy?" "That's
right," he says bluntly.
Rocked, you cover your
face. "By God! I can remember now, thinking back in detail over my whole
life—it started in
the bus that
day I passed the entrance exams. What is it? Please, what is it?"
"Well, if you want me
to get technical, they call it Dell's hypothesis. It was formulated way back in
the middle of the 20th century by Dudley Dell, which was one of the
pseudonyms of a magazine editor. As I remember it, he later became a lay
analyst and—"
"Please, Colonel!" You're in
trouble.
"Okay, okay," he says soothingly.
"Well, up to that time, psychologists—particularly analysts—had been
banging their heads against a stone wall in certain cases, and sometimes
banging up the patient in the process. Those early therapists knew that
childish feelings and motivations were interfering with adult efficiency and happiness.
When a man would slam out of his house and do a lousy day's work after a fight
with his wife, the doctor would tell him, 'You're acting as if
you were a child rejected
by its mother,' and this was—"
"Colonel, sir, are you
going to please tell me what the hell's with me?"
"I am," he answers calmly.
"This, as I was beginning to explain, was all wrong because the 'as if
concept made the patient disbelieve in this active eight-year-old within him —a
very viable, hard-fighting, eight-year-old it was, too. So when behaviour got
more infantile, the doc would pull his beard, or chin, and say, 'Mm-hmm, schizophrenia,' thereby scaring the
liverwurst out of the patient. Dell stopped all that."
"Dell stopped all that," you
repeat, suffering.
"It was a little thing, that hypothesis
of his—little like
E =
MC8 or Newton's apple—but, oh, my, what happened!"
"Oh, my," you
agree. "What happened?"
"Dell
began directing therapy to the infantile segment, treating it as a living,
thinking, feeling organism. It responded so excellently that it changed the
face of psychoanalysis. Now in your case—you're not going to interrupt?"
You shake your head blankly
but obediently.
"Good.
In your case, an extension of Dell's hypothesis was used. The sum total of your
life up until you took your entrance examinations to this Base was arrested at
the age of 15. A hypnotic barrier was erected so that you could have no access
to any of this. You-^-all of you cadets —literally start a new life here, with
no ties whatever to an earlier one. Your technical education very deliberately
has no reference factors to anything but itself. You learn quickly because your
minds are uncluttered. You never miss your past because we're careful never to
reactivate it.
"When
this approach was first tried, the subjects were graduated with memories only
of their training. Well, it didn't work. Childhood conditioning is too
important to the entire human being to be wiped out without diminishing the
subject in just about every emotional way. So we developed this new system.
That's what we used on you.
"But
we discovered a peculiar thing. Even in untrained adults—as opposed to the
sharp division of pre- and post-entrance you have here—even untrained adults
suffer to greater or lesser degree from internal strife between childhood and
adult interpretations and convictions. An exaggerated example would be a
child's implicit belief in Santa Claus and the Easter bunny, existing at one
and the same time with the adult's realization that these are only legends. The
inner child—the child within the adult—still exists, according to Dell and to
all tests since, and will fight like the very devil for survival, beliefs and
all . . . especially
one whose beliefs and
natural feelings and reactions had been made grounds for punishment or
ridicule.
"The
schism between you and Scampy was extreme; you were, in effect, born on
different planets. To be a complete human being, you had to be rejoined; but to
be integrated successfully, you and Scampy had to learn how to get along
together. For Scampy, this was not difficult—you, even in injustice and
cruelty, were a real live hero-image. But the adult you had a stonier path.
Somewhere within yourself, though, you somehow found an element of tolerance
and empathy, and used it to bridge the gap.
"I may say," the Colonel adds severely,
"that it takes a particularly fine kind of person to negotiate this
difficult merger. You are not usual, Cadet; not usual at all."
"Scampy,"
you murmur. Impulsively, you pull your shirt away from your chest and look down
as if there were something hiding there. "But he talked to me! Don't tell me you've secretly invented
a telepathic converter with bandpass filters!"
"Of
course not. When the barrier was erected between you and Scampy, Scampy was
conditioned to speak sub-vocally—that is, back in the throat and virtually
without lip movement. You have a subminiature transmitter placed surgically in
your pharynx. The button on your bulkhead activated it. There had to be a
button, you see; we couldn't have the two of you speaking at the same time,
which is what persons in the same room invariably do. You can't subvocalize and talk simultaneously. It would have tipped you off. Hence the button."
"I
can't get used to it," you complain. "I can't! I practically saw the boy! Listen, Colonel—can I keep my built-in transmitter and have the
same rig on my starship?"
He
smiles, although you think it hurts his face. "You really want it left as
is?"
"He's a good
kid."
"Very
well—Commander. Dismissed." He marches away.
You look after him, shaking your head. Then
you duck into the space can. You stare at the bulkhead and at the button and at
the scoring on the plate where you came that close
to filling your cabin with your hydrazine supply. You shudder.
"Hey," you call softly. "Scamp!"
You push the button. You hear the carrier.
Then, "I'm thirsty," says Scampy.
You cut out of there and go down to the rec
area and into the short-order bar.
"A
beer," you say. "And put a lump of vanilla ice cream in it. And two
straws."
"You crazy?" asks the man.
"No," you say. "Oh, no!"
THE ANYTHING
BOX
Zenna Henderson
Zenna Henderson is a
schoolteacher ("mostly first grade, but have taught them all—up to Adult
Group Teaching In Eloy now") who has lived all her life in or near Tucson,
Arizona, except for two years in France (teaching in Army schools) and one in
Connecticut. Her first story, "Come On, Wagon" (1951), was included
in a 1965 collection of which The Anything Box
is the title story; "Something Bright" and "Subcommittee",
in the same collection, also appeared in the 6th and 8th SF Annuals. In 1952,
she began writing the "People" stories, for which she is best known;
these have now been collected in two book-length volumes: Pilgrimage: The Book of the People (1962) includes "Pottage", which also appeared in the 1st SF Annual, and "Wilderness", which was in the 3rd. The People: No Different Flesh was
published earlier this year by Doubleday.
"The
Anything Box" first appeared in Fantasy &
Science Fiction, January, 1956, and was included in the 2nd SF Annual.
IsupposEit was
about the second week of school that I noticed Sue-lynn particularly. Of course,
I'd noticed her name before and checked her out automatically for maturity and
ability and probable performance the way most teachers do with their students
during the first weeks of school. She had checked out mature and capable and no
worry as to performance as I had pigeonholed her—setting aside for the moment
the little nudge that said, 'Too quiet"—with my other no-worrys until the
fluster and flurry of the first days had died down a little.
I remember my noticing day.
I had collapsed into my chair for a brief respite from guiding hot little hands
through the intricacies of keeping a crayola within reason
able bounds and the room
was full of the relaxed, happy hum of a pleased class as they worked away, not
realizing that they were rubbing "blue" into their memories as well
as onto their papers. I was meditating on how individual personalities were
beginning to emerge among the 35 or so heterogeneous first graders I had, when
I noticed Sue-lynn —really noticed her—for the first time.
She
had finished her paper—far ahead of the others as usual—and was sitting at her
table facing me. She had her thumbs touching in front of her on the table and
her fingers curving as though they held something between them— something large
enough to keep her fingertips apart and angular enough to bend her fingers as
if for corners. It was something pleasant that she held—pleasant and precious.
You could tell that by the softness of her hold. She was leaning forward a
little, her lower ribs pressed against the table, and she was looking,
completely absorbed, at the table between her hands. Her face was relaxed and
happy. Her mouth curved in a tender half-smile, and as I watched, her lashes lifted
and she looked at me with a warm share-the-pleasure look. Then her eyes blinked
and the shutters came down inside them. Her hand flicked into the desk and out.
She pressed her thumbs to her forefingers and rubbed them slowly together. Then
she laid one hand over the other on the table and looked down at them with the
air of complete denial and ignorance children can assume so devastatingly.
The
incident caught my fancy and I began to notice Sue-lynn. As I consciously
watched her, I saw that she spent most of her free time staring at the table
between her hands, much too unobtrusively to catch my busy attention. She
hurried through even the fun-est of fun papers and then lost herself in
looking. When Davie pushed her down at recess, and blood streamed from her knee
to her ankle, she took her bandages and her tear-smudged face to that comfort
she had so readily—if you'll pardon the expression—at hand, and emerged minutes
later, serene and dry-eyed. I think Davie pushed her down because of her
Looking. I know the day before he had come up to me, red-faced and squirming.
"Teacher," he blurted. "She
Looks!"
"Who
looks?" I asked absently, checking the vocabulary list in my book,
wondering how on earth I'd missed where, one
of those annoying wh words
that throw the children for a loss.
"Sue-lynn. She Looks and Looks!"
"At you?" I asked.
"Well ..."
He rubbed a forefinger below his nose, leaving a clean streak on his upper
lip, accepted the proffered Kleenex and put it in his pocket. "She looks
at her desk and tells lies. She says she can see ..."
"Can see what?" My curiosity picked
up its ears.
"Anything,"
said Davie. "It's her Anything Box. She can see anything she wants
to."
"Does it hurt you for her to Look?"
"Well,"
he squirmed. Then he burst out: "She says she saw me with a dog biting me
because I took her pencil— she said." He started a pellmell verbal
retreat. "She thinks
I took her pencil. I only
found—" His eyes dropped. "I'll give it back."
"I
hope so," I smiled. "If you don't want her to look at you, then don't
do things like that."
"Durn girls," he muttered and
clomped back to his seat.
So I
think he pushed her down the next day to get back at her for the dog-bite.
Several
times after that I wandered to the back of the room, casually in her vicinity,
but always she either saw or felt me coming and the quick sketch of her hand
disposed of the evidence. Only once I thought I caught a glimmer of
something—but her thumb and forefinger brushed in sunlight, and it must have
been just that.
Children don't retreat for no reason at all,
and, though Sue-lynn did not follow any overt pattern of withdrawal, I started
to wonder about her. I watched her on the playground, to see how she tracked
there. That only confused me more.
She had a very regular pattern. When the
avalanche of children first descended at recess, she avalanched along with them
and nothing in the shrieking, running, dodging mass resolved itself into a
withdrawn Sue-lynn. But after ten minutes or so, she emerged from the crowd,
tousle-haired, rosy-cheeked, smutched with dust, one shoelace dangling and,
through some alchemy that I coveted for myself, she suddenly became untousled,
undusty and unsmutched. And there she was, serene and composed on the narrow
little step at the side of the flight of stairs just where they disappeared
into the base of the pseudo-Corinthian column that graced Our Door and her
cupped hands received whatever they received and her absorption in what she
saw became so complete that the bell came as a shock every time.
And
each time, before she joined the rush to Our Door, her hand would sketch a
gesture to her pocket, if she had one, or to the tiny ledge that extended
between the hedge and the building. Apparently she always had to put the
Anything Box away, but never had to go back to get it.
I
was so intrigued by her putting whatever it was on the ledge that once I
actually went over and felt along the grimy little outset. I sheepishly followed
my children into the hall, wiping the dust from my fingertips, and Sue-lynn's
eyes brimmed amusement at me without her mouth's smiling. Her hands
mischievously squared in front of her and her thumbs caressed a solidness as
the line of children swept into the room.
I
smiled too because she was so pleased with having outwitted me. This seemed to
be such a gay withdrawal that I let my worry die down. Better this
manifestation than any number of other ones that I could name.
Some
day, perhaps, I'll learn to keep my mouth shut. I wish I had before that long
afternoon when we primary teachers worked together in a heavy cloud of ditto
fumes, the acrid smell of India ink, drifting cigarette smoke and the constant
current of chatter, and I let Alpha get me started on what to do with our
behaviour problems. She was all raunched up about the usual rowdy loudness of
her boys and the eternal clack of her girls, and I—bless my stupidity —gave her
Sue-lynn as an example of what should be our deepest concern rather than the
outbursts from our active ones.
"You
mean she just sits and looks at nothing?" Alpha's voice grated into her
questioning tone.
"Well,
I can't see anything," I admitted. "But apparently she can."
"But
that's having hallucinations!" Her voice went up a notch. "I read a
book once—■"
"Yes."
Marlene leaned across the desk to flick ashes into the ash tray. "So we
have heard and heard and heard."
"Well!" sniffed Alpha. "It's
better than never reading a book."
"We're waiting," Marlene leaked
smoke from her nostrils, "for the day when you read another book. This
one must have been uncommonly long."
"Oh,
I don't know." Alpha's forehead wrinkled with concentration. "It was
only about—" Then she reddened and turned her face angrily away from
Marlene.
"Apropos
of our discussion—" she said pointedly. "It sounds to me like that
child has a deep personality disturbance. Maybe even a
psychotic—whatever—" Her eyes glistened faintly as she turned the thought
over.
"Oh,
I don't know," I said, surprised into echoing her words at my sudden need
to defend Sue-lynn. "There's something about her. She doesn't have that
apprehensive, hunched-shoulder, don't-hit-me-again air about her that so many
withdrawn children have." And I thought achingly of one of mine from last
year that Alpha had now and was verbally bludgeoning back into silence after
all my work with him. "She seems to have a happy, adjusted' personality,
only with this odd little . . . plus."
"Well,
I'd be worried if she were mine," said Alpha. "I'm glad all my kids
are so normal." She sighed complacently. "I guess I really haven't
anything to kick about. I seldom ever have problem children except wigglers and
yakkers, and a holler and a smack can straighten them out."
Marlene
caught my eye mockingly, tallying Alpha's class with me, and I turned away with
a sigh. To be so happy— well, I suppose ignorance does help.
"You'd
better do something about that girl," Alpha shrilled as she left the room.
"She'll probably get worse and worse as time goes on. Deteriorating, I
think the book said."
I
had known Alpha a long time and I thought I knew how much of her talk to
discount, but I began to worry about Sue-lynn. Maybe this was a disturbance that was more fundamental than the usual run-of-the-mill
that I had met up with. Maybe a child can smile
a soft, contented smile and still have little maggots of madness flourishing
somewhere inside.
Or,
by gorry! I said to myself defiantly, maybe she does have an Anything Box. Maybe she is looking at something precious. Who am I to say no to anything like that?
An
Anything Box! What could you see in an Anything Box? Heart's desire? I felt my
own heart lurch—just a little —the next time Sue-lynn's hands curved. I
breathed deeply to hold me in my chair. If it was her Anything Box, I wouldn't be able to see my heart's desire in it. Or
would I? I propped my cheek up on my hand and doodled aimlessly on my
time-schedule sheet. How on earth, I wondered—not for the first time—do I manage to get myself off on these tangents?
Then
I felt a small presence at my elbow and turned to meet Sue-lynn's wide eyes.
"Teacher?" The
word was hardly more than a breath.
"Yes?"
I could tell that for some reason Sue-lynn was loving me dearly at the moment.
Maybe because her group had gone into new books that morning. Maybe because I
had noticed her new dress, the ruffles of which made her feel very feminine and
lovable, or maybe just because the late autumn sun lay so golden across her
desk. Anyway, she was loving me to overflowing, and since, unlike most of the
children, she had no casual hugs or easy moist kisses, she was bringing her
love to me in her encompassing hands.
"See my box, Teacher?
It's my Anything Box."
"Oh, my!" I said.
"May I hold it?"
After all, I have held—tenderly or
apprehensively or bravely—tiger magic, live rattlesnakes, dragon's teeth, poor
little dead butterflies and two ears and a nose that dropped off Sojie one cold
morning—none of which I could see any more than I could the Anything Box. But I
took the squareness from her carefully, my tenderness showing in my Angers
and my face.
And I received weight and
substance and actuality!
Almost
I let it slip out of my surprised fingers, but Sue-lynn's apprehensive breath
helped me catch it and I curved my fingers around the precious warmness and
looked down, down, past a faint shimmering, down into Sue-lynn's Anything Box.
I was running barefoot through the whispering
grass. The swirl of my skirts caught the daisies as I rounded the gnarled
appletree at the corner. The warm wind lay along each of my cheeks and chuckled
in my ears. My heart outstripped
my
flying feet and melted with a rush of
delight into warm-ness as his arms—
I closed my eyes and swallowed hard, my palms
tight against the Anything Box. "It's beautiful!" I whispered.
"It's wonderful, Sue-lynn. Where did you get it?"
Her
hands took it back hastily. "It's mine," she said defiantly.
"It's mine."
"Of course," I
said. "Be careful now. Don't drop it."
She
smiled faintly as she sketched a motion to her pocket. "I won't." She
patted the pocket on her way back to her seat.
Next day she was afraid to look at me at
first for fear I might say something or look something or in some way remind
her of what must seem like a betrayal to her now, but after I only smiled my
usual smile, with no added secret knowledge, she relaxed.
A
night or so later when I leaned over my moon-drenched window sill and let the
shadow of my hair hide my face from such ebullient glory, I remembered about
the Anything Box. Could I make one for myself? Could I square off this aching
waiting, this out-reaching, this silent cry inside me, and make it into an
Anything Box? I freed my hands and brought them together thumb to thumb,
framing a part of the horizon's darkness between my upright forefingers. I
stared into the empty square until my eyes watered. I sighed, and laughed a little,
and let my hands frame my face as I leaned out into the night. To have magic so
near—to feel it tingle off my fingertips and then to be so bound that I
couldn't receive it. I turned away from the window—turning my back on
brightness.
It
wasn't long after this that Alpha succeeded in putting sharp points of worry
back in my thoughts of Sue-lynn. We had ground duty together, and one morning
when we shivered while the kids ran themselves rosy in the crisp air, she
sizzed in my ear.
"Which one is it? The
abnormal one, I mean."
"I
don't have any abnormal children," I said, my voice sharpening before the
sentence ended because I suddenly realized whom she meant.
"Well,
I call it abnormal to stare at nothing." You could almost taste the acid
in her words. "Who is it?"
"Sue-lynn," I said reluctantly.
"She's playing on the bars now."
Alpha
surveyed the upside-down Sue-lynn whose brief skirts were belled down from her
bare pink legs and half covered her face as she swung from one of the bars by
her knees. Alpha clutched her wizened blue hands together and breathed on them.
"She looks normal enough," she said.
"She is normal!" I snapped.
"Well,
bite my head off!"
cried Alpha. "You're the one that said she wasn't, not me—or is it 'not 1'? I never could remember. Not me? Not I?"
The
bell saved Alpha from a horrible end. I never knew a person so serenely unaware
of essentials and so sensitive to trivia. But she had succeeded in making me
worry about Sue-lynn again, and the worry exploded into distress a few days
later.
Sue-lynn
came to school sleepy-eyed and quiet. She didn't finish any of her work and she
fell asleep during rest time. I cussed TV and Drive-Ins and assumed a night's
sleep would put it right. But next day Sue-lynn burst into tears and slapped
Davie clear off his chair.
"Why
Sue-lynn!" I gathered Davie up in all his astonishment and took
Sue-lynn's hand. She jerked it away from me and flung herself at Davie again.
She got two handfuls of his hair and had him out of my grasp before I knew it.
She threw him bodily against the wall with a flip of her hands, then doubled up
her fists and pressed them to her streaming eyes. In the shocked silence of the
room, she stumbled over to Isolation and, seating herself, back to the class,
on the little chair, she leaned her head into the corner and sobbed quietly in
big gulping sobs.
"What
on earth goes on?" I asked the stupefied Davie who sat spraddle-legged on
the floor fingering a detached tuft of hair. "What did you do?"
"I
only said 'Robber Daughter,'" said Davie. "It said so in the paper.
My mamma said her daddy's a robber. They put him in jail cause he robbered a
gas station." His bewildered face was trying to decide whether or not to
cry. Everything had happened so fast that he didn't know yet if he was hurt.
"It isn't nice to call names," I
said weakly. "Get back into your seat. I'll take care of Sue-lynn
later."
He
got up and sat gingerly down in his chair, rubbing his ruffled hair, wanting to
make more of a production of the situation but not knowing how. He twisted his
face experimentally to see if he had tears available and had none.
"Dura
girls," he muttered and tried to shake his fingers free of a wisp of hair.
I
kept my eye on Sue-lynn for the next half hour as I busied myself with the class. Her sobs soon stopped and her rigid
shoulders relaxed. Her hands were softly in her lap and I knew she was taking
comfort from her Anything Box. We had our talk together later, but she was so
completely sealed off from me by her misery that there was no communication
between us. She sat quietly watching me as I talked, her hands trembling in her
lap. It shakes the heart, somehow, to see the hands of a little child quiver
like that.
That
afternoon I looked up from my reading group, startled, as though by a cry, to
catch Sue-lynn's frightened eyes. She looked around bewildered and then down at
her hands again—her empty hands. Then she darted to the Isolation corner and
reached under the chair. She went back to her seat slowly, her hands squared to
an unseen weight. For the first time, apparently, she had had to go get the
Anything Box. It troubled me with a vague unease for the rest of the afternoon.
Through the days that
followed while the trial hung fire, I had Sue-lynn in attendance bodily, but
that was all. She sank into her Anything Box at every opportunity. And always,
if she had put it away somewhere, she had to go back for it. She roused more
and more reluctantly from these waking dreams, and there finally came a day
when I had to shake her to waken her.
I went to her mother, but she couldn't or
wouldn't understand me, and made me feel like a frivolous gossip-monger taking
her mind away from her husband, despite the fact that I didn't even mention
him—or maybe because I didn't mention him.
"If she's being a bad girl, spank
her," she finally said, wearily shifting the weight of a whining baby from
one hip to another and pushing her tousled hair off her forehead.
"Whatever you do is all right by me. My worrier is all used up. I haven't
got any left for the kids right now."
Well,
Sue-lynn's father was found guilty and sentenced to the State Penitentiary and
school was less than an hour old the next day when Davie came up, clumsily
a-tiptoe, braving my wrath for interrupting a reading group, and whispered
hoarsely, "Sue-lynn's asleep with her eyes open again, Teacher."
We
went back to the table and Davie slid into his chair next to a completely
unaware Sue-lynn. He poked her with a warning finger. "I told you I'd tell
on you."
And
before our horrified eyes, she toppled, as rigidly as a doll, sideways off the
chair. The thud of her landing relaxed her and she lay limp on the green
asphalt tile—a thin paper-doll of a girl, one hand still clenched open around
something. I pried her fingers loose and almost wept to feel enchantment
dissolve under my heavy touch. I carried her down to the nurse's room and we
worked over her with wet towels and prayer and she finally opened her eyes.
"Teacher," she
whispered weakly.
"Yes, Sue-lynn."
I took her cold hands in mine.
"Teacher, I almost got
in my Anything Box."
"No," I answered.
"You couldn't. You're too big."
"Daddy's there,"
she said. "And where we used to live."
I took a long, long look at her wan face. I
hope it was genuine concern for her that prompted my next words. I hope it
wasn't envy or the memory of the niggling nagging of Alpha's voice that put
firmness in my voice as I went on. "That's play-like," I said.
"Just for fun."
Her
hands jerked protestingly in mine. "Your Anything Box is just for fun.
It's like Davie's cowpony that he keeps in his desk or Sojie's jet plane, or
when the big bear chases all of you at recess. It's fun-for-play, but it's not
for real. You mustn't think it's for real. It's only play."
"No!"
she denied. "No!"
she cried frantically and,
hunching herself up on the cot, peering through her tear-swollen eyes, she
scrabbled under the pillow and down beneath the rough blanket that covered her.
"Where
is it?" she cried. "Where is it? Give it back to me, Teacher!"
She flung herself toward me and pulled open
both my clenched hands.
"Where did you put it?
Where did you put it?"
"There
is no Anything Box," I said flatly, trying to hold her to me and feeling
my heart breaking along with hers.
"You
took it!" she sobbed. "You took it away from me!" And she
wrenched herself out of my arms.
"Can't
you give it back to her?" whispered the nurse. "If it makes her feel
so bad? Whatever it is—"
"It's
just imagination," I said, almostly sullenly. "I can't give her back
something that doesn't exist."
Too
young! I thought bitterly. Too young to learn that heart's desire is only
play-like.
Of course the doctor found nothing wrong. Her
mother dismissed the matter as a fainting spell and Sue-lynn came back to class
next day, thin and listless, staring blankly out the window, her hands palm
down on the desk. I swore by the pale hollow of her cheek that never, never again would I take any belief from anyone without replacing it with
something better. What had I given Sue-lynn? What had she better than I had
taken from her? How did I know but that her Anything Box was on purpose to tide
her over rough spots in her life like this? And what now, now that I had taken
it from her?
Well,
after a time she began to work again, and later, to play. She came back to
smiles, but not to laughter. She puttered along quite satisfactorily except
that she was a candle blown out. The flame was gone wherever the brightness of
belief goes. And she had no more sharing smiles for me, no overflowing love to
bring to me. And her shoulder shrugged subtly away from my touch.
Then
one day I suddenly realized that Sue-lynn was searching our class room.
Stealthily, casually, day by day she was searching, covering every inch of the
room. She went through every puzzle box, every lump of clay, every shelf and
cupboard, every box and bag. Methodically she checked behind every row of books
and in every child's desk until finally, after almost a week, she had been
through everything in the place except my desk. Then she began to materialize
suddenly at my elbow every time I opened a drawer. And her eyes would probe
quickly and sharply before I slid it shut again. But if I tried to intercept
her looks, they slid away and she had some legitimate errand that had brought
her up to the vicinity of the desk.
She
believes it again, I thought hopefully. She won't accept the fact that her
Anything Box is gone. She wants it again.
But it is gone, I thought drearily. It's really-for-true gone.
My
head was heavy from troubled sleep, and sorrow was a weariness in all my
movements. Waiting is sometimes a burden almost too heavy to carry. While my
children hummed happily over their fun-stuff, I brooded silently out the window
until I managed a laugh at myself. It was a shaky laugh that threatened to
dissolve into something else, so I brisked back to my desk.
As
good a time as any to throw out useless things, I thought, and to see if I can
find that colored chalk I put away so carefully. I plunged my hands into the
wilderness of the bottom right-hand drawer of my desk. It was deep with a huge
accumulation of anything—just anything—that might need a temporary hiding
place. I knelt to pull out left-over Jack Frost pictures, and a broken bean
shooter, a chewed red ribbon, a roll of cap-gun ammunition, one striped sock,
six Numbers papers, a rubber dagger, a copy of The Gospel According to St. Luke, a miniature coal shovel, patterns for
jack-o'-lanterns, and a pink plastic pelican. I retrieved my Irish linen hankie
I thought lost forever and Sojie's report card that he had told me solemnly
had blown out of his hand and landed on a jet and broke the sound barrier so
loud that it busted all to flitters. Under the welter of miscellany, I felt a
squareness. Oh, happy! I thought, this is where
I put the colored chalk! I cascaded papers off both sides of my lifting hands
and shook the box free.
We
were together again. Outside, the world was an enchanting wilderness of white, the wind shouting softly through
the windows, tapping wet, white fingers against the warm light. Inside all the
worry and waiting, the apartness and loneliness were over and forgotten, their
hugeness dwindled by the comfort of a
shoulder, the warmth of clasping
hands—and nowhere, nowhere was the fear of parting,
nowhere the need to do without again. This was the happy ending. This was—
This was Sue-lynn's Anything Box!
My
racing heart slowed as the dream faded . . . and rushed again at the
realization. I had it here! In my junk drawer! It had been here all the time!
I
stood up shakily, concealing the invisible box in the flare of my skirts. I sat
down and put the box carefully in the center of my desk, covering the top of it
with my palms lest I should drown again in delight. I looked at Sue-lynn. She
was finishing her fun paper, competently but un-joyously. Now would come her
patient sitting with quiet hands until told to do something else.
Alpha
would approve. And very possibly, I thought, Alpha would, for once in her
limited life, be right. We may need "hallucinations" to keep us
going—all of us but the Alphas—but when we go so far as to try to force ourselves,
physically, into the Nevemeverland of heart's desire . . .
I
remembered Sue-lynn's thin rigid body toppling dolllike off its chair. Out of
her deep need she had found—or created? Who could tell?—something too dangerous
for a child. I could so easily bring the brimming happiness back to her
eyes—but at what a possible price!
No,
I had a duty to protect Sue-lynn. Only maturity— the maturity born of the
sorrow and loneliness that Sue-lynn was only beginning to know—could be trusted
to use an Anything Box safely and wisely.
My
heart thudded as I began to move my hands, letting the palms slip down from the
top to shape the sides of—
I
had moved them back again before I really saw, and I have now learned almost to
forget that glimpse of what heart's desire is like when won at the cost of
another's heart.
I sat there at the desk trembling and
breathless, my palms moist, feeling as if I had been on a long journey away
from the little schoolroom. Perhaps I had. Perhaps I had been shown all the
kingdoms of the world in a moment of time.
"Sue-lynn,"
I called. "Will you come up here when you're through?"
She
nodded unsmilingly and snipped off the last paper from the edge of Mistress
Mary's dress. Without another look at her handiwork, she carried the scissors
safely to the scissors box, crumpled the scraps of paper in her hand and came
up to the waste basket by the desk.
"I have something for you, Sue-lynn," I
said, uncovering the box.
Her eyes dropped to the desk top. She looked
indifferently up at me. "I did my fun paper already." "Did you
like it?" "Yes." It was a flat lie.
"Good,"
I lied right back. "But look here." I squared my hands around the
Anything Box.
She
took a deep breath and the whole of her little body stiffened.
"I
found it," I said hastily, fearing anger. "I found it in the bottom
drawer."
She
leaned her chest against my desk, her hands caught tightly between, her eyes
intent on the box, her face white with the aching want you see on children's
faces pressed to Christmas windows.
"Can I have it?"
she whispered.
"It's yours," I
said, holding it out.
Still
she leaned against her hands, her eyes searching my face. "Can I have
it?" she asked again.
"Yes!" I was
impatient with this anticlimax. "But—"
Her
eyes flickered. She had sensed my reservation before I had. "But you must never try to get into it again."
"OK,"
she said, the word coming out on a long relieved sigh. "OK, Teacher."
She
took the box and tucked it lovingly into her small pocket. She turned from the
desk and started back to her table. My mouth quirked with a small smile. It
seemed to me that everything about her had suddenly turned upward—even the
ends of her straight taffy-colored hair. The subtle flame about her that made
her Sue-lynn was there again. She scarcely touched the floor as she walked.
I
sighed heavily and traced on the desk top with my finger a probable size for an
Anything Box. What would Sue-lynn choose to see first? How like a drink after a
drought it would seem to her.
I was startled as a small figure materialized
at my elbow. It was Sue-lynn, her fingers carefully squared before her.
"Teacher," she said softly, all the flat emptiness gone
from her voice. "Any time you want to
take my Anything Box, you just say so."
I
groped through my astonishment and incredulity for words. She couldn't possibly
have had time to look into the Box yet.
"Why,
thank you, Sue-Iynn," I managed. "Thanks a lot. I would like very
much to borrow it some time."
"Would you like it now?" she asked,
proffering it.
"No,
thank you," I said, around the lump in my throat. "I've had a turn
already. You go ahead."
"OK," she murmured.
Then—"Teacher?"
"Yes?"
Shyly
she leaned against me, her cheek on my shoulder. She looked up at me with her
warm, unshuttered eyes, then both arms were suddenly around my neck in a brief
awkward embrace.
"Watch
out!" I whispered laughing into the collar of her blue dress. "You'll
lose it again!"
"No
I won't," she laughed back, patting the flat pocket of her dress.
"Not ever, ever again!"
PRIMA BELLADONNA
J. G. Ballard
J. G. Ballard is
the most controversial author in science fiction today: doubly controversial,
because American fans and critics are still arguing over his latest novel. The Crystal World (1966), while British readers are battling
over his more recent surrealistic short fiction ("condensed novels")
now appearing in New Worlds,
Encounter, and Ambit, but not yet published in the U.S.
Born
in Shanghai in 1930, Ballard was repatriated to England at the age of sixteen,
after his release from a Japanese internment camp. He read medicine at
Cambridge, and won the annual short-story competition there in 1951.
"Prima Belladonna" was the first story he sold, in 1956. He now has
six short-story collections in print in the U.S. and four in England, as well
as four novels. His most recent American book was The Impossible Man (Berkley, 1966). Two new collections are
scheduled shortly, by Berkley, and by Doubleday.
"Prima
Belladonna" originally appeared in Science Fantasy, Dec, 1956, and was reprinted in the 2nd
Annual and in the author's collections, Billenium (U.S.,
1962) and The Four-Dimensional
Nightmare (U.K.,
1963).
I first met jane ciracylides during the Recess, that world slump of
boredom, lethargy and high summer which carried us all so blissfully through
ten unforgettable years, and I suppose that may have had a lot to do with what
went on between us. Certainly I can't believe I could make myself as
ridiculous now, but then again, it might have been just Jane herself.
Whatever else they said
about her, everyone had to agree she was a beautiful girl, even if her genetic
background was a little mixed. The gossips at Vermillion Sands
soon
decided there was a good deal of mutant in her, because she had a rich
patina-golden skin and what looked like insects for eyes, but that didn't
bother either myself or any of my friends, one or two of whom, like Tony Miles
and Harry Devine, have never since been quite the same to their wives.
We
spent most of our time in those days on the wide cool balcony of my apartment
off Beach Drive, drinking beer— we always kept a useful supply stacked in the
refrigerator of my music shop on the street level—yarning in a desultory way
and playing i-Go, a sort of decelerated chess which was popular then. None of
the others ever did any work; Harry was an architect and Tony Miles sometimes
sold a few ceramics to the tourists, but I usually put a couple of hours in at
the shop each morning, getting off the foreign orders and turning the beer.
One
particularly hot lazy day I'd just finished wrapping up a delicate soprano
mimosa wanted by the Hamburg Oratorio Society when Harry phoned down from the
balcony.
"Parker's Choro-FIora?" he said.
"You're guilty of overproduction. Come on up here. Tony and I have
something beautiful to show you."
When
I went up I found them grinning happily like two dogs who had just discovered
an interesting tree.
"Well?" I asked. "Where is
it?"
Tony tilted his head slightly. "Over
there," he indicated.
I
looked up and down the street, and across the face of the apartment house
opposite.
"Careful," he warned me.
"Don't gape at her."
I
slid into one of the wicker chairs and craned my head round cautiously.
"Fourth floor," Harry elaborated
slowly, out of the side of his mouth. "One left from the balcony opposite.
Happy now?"
"Dreaming," I told him, taking a
long slow focus on her. "I wonder what else she can do?"
Harry and Tony sighed thankfully.
"Well?" Tony asked.
"She's
out of my league," I said. "But you two shouldn't have any trouble.
Go over and tell her how much she needs you."
Harry groaned. "Don't you realize, this
one is poetic, emergent, something straight out of the primal apocalyptic sea.
She's probably divine."
The
woman was strolling around the lounge, re-arranging the furniture, wearing
almost nothing except a large abstract metallic hat. Even in shadow the long
sinuous lines of her thighs and shoulders gleamed gold and burning. She was a
walking galaxy of light. Vermillion Sands had never seen anything like her.
"The
approach has got to be equivocal," Harry continued, gazing into his beer.
"Shy, almost mystical. Nothing urgent or grabbing."
The
woman stooped down to unpack a suitcase and the metal vanes of her hat
fluttered over her face. I didn't bother to remind Harry that Betty, his wife
and a girl of considerable spirit, would have firmly restrained him from
anything that wasn't mystical.
"She
must use up about a kilowatt," I calculated. "What do you think her
chemistry is?"
"Who
cares," Harry said. "It doesn't matter to me if it's siliconic."
"In this heat?" I said. "She'd
ignite."
The
woman walked out onto the balcony, saw us staring at her, looked around for a
moment and then went in again.
We
sat back and looked thoughtfully at each other, like three triumvirs deciding
how to divide an empire, not saying too much, and one eye watching for any
chance of a double-deal.
Five minutes later the singing started.
At
first I thought it was one of the azalea trios in trouble with an alkaline pH,
but the frequencies were too high. They were almost out of the audible range, a
thin tremolo quaver which came out of nowhere and rose up the back of the
skull.
Harry and Tony frowned at me.
"Your
livestock's unhappy about something," Tony told me. "Can you quieten
it down?"
"It's not the plants," I told him.
"Can't be."
The
sound mounted in intensity, scraping the edge off my occipital bones. I was
about to go down to the shop when Harry and Tony leaped out of their chairs and
dived back against the wall.
"For chrissake, Steve, look out!"
Tony yelled at me. He pointed wildly at the table I was leaning on, picked up a
chair and smashed it down on the glass top.
I stood up and brushed the
fragments out of my hair.
"What the hell's the
matter?" I asked them.
Tony
was looking down at the tangle of wickerwork tied round the metal struts of the
table. Harry came forward and took my arm gingerly.
"That was close. You
all right?"
"It's gone," Tony said flatly. He
looked carefully over the balcony floor and down over the rail into the street.
"What was it?" I asked.
Harry
peered at me closely. "Didn't you see it? It was about three inches from
you. Emperor Scorpion, big as a lobster." He sat down weakly on a beer
crate. "Must have been a sonic one. The noise has gone now."
After
they'd left I cleared up the mess and had a quiet beer to myself. I could have
sworn nothing had got onto the table.
On
the balcony opposite, wearing a gown of shimmering ionized fiber, the golden
woman was watching me.
I found out who she was the next morning.
Tony and Harry were down at the beach with their wives, probably enlarging on
the scorpion, and I was in the shop tuning up a Khan-Arachnid orchid with the
UV lamp. It was a difficult bloom, with a normal full range of twenty-four
octaves, but like all the tetracot K3 + 25 C5 A9
chorotropes, unless it got a lot of exercise it tended to relapse into neurotic
minor key transpositions which were the devil to break. And as the senior bloom
in the shop it naturally affected all the others. Invariably when I opened the
shop in the mornings it sounded like a madhouse, but as soon as I'd fed the
Arachnid and straightened out one of two pH gradients the rest promptly took
their cues from it and dimmed down quietly in their control tanks, two-time,
three-four, the multi-tones, all in perfect harmony.
There
were only about a dozen true Arachnids in captivity; most of the others were
either mutes or grafts from dicot stems, and I was lucky to have mine at all.
I'd bought the place five years earlier from an old half-deaf man called
Sayers, and the day before he left he moved a lot of rogue stock out to the
garbage disposal scoop behind the apartment block. Reclaiming some of the
tanks, I'd come across the Arachnid, thriving on a diet of algae and perished
rubber tubing.
Why
Sayers had wanted to throw it away I'd never discovered. Before he came to
Vermillion Sands he'd been a curator at the old Kew Conservatoire where the
first choroflora had been bred, and had worked under the Director, Dr. Mandel,
who as a young botanist of twenty-five had discovered the prime Arachnid in the
Guiana forest. The orchid took its name from the Khan-Arachnid spider which
pollinated the flower, simultaneously laying its own eggs in the fleshy ovule,
guided, or as Mandel always insisted, actually mesmerized to it by the
vibrations which the orchid's calyx emitted at pollination-time. The first Arachnid
orchids beamed out only a few random frequencies, but by cross-breeding and
maintaining them artificially at the pollination stage Mandel had produced a
strain that spanned a maximum of twenty-four octaves.
Not
that he's ever been able to hear them. At the climax of his life's work Mandel,
like Beethoven, was stone deaf, but apparently by merely looking at a blossom
he could listen to its music. Strangely, though, after he went deaf he never
looked at an Arachnid.
That
morning I could almost understand why. The orchid was in a vicious mood. First
it refused to feed, and I had to coax it along in a fluoraldehyde flush, and
then it started going ultra-sonic, which meant complaints from all the dog
owners in the area. Finally it tried to fracture the tank by resonating.
The
whole place was in uproar, and I was almost resigned to shutting them down and
waking them all by hand individually—a back-breaking job with eighty tanks in
the shop—when everything suddenly died away to a murmur.
I looked round and saw the
golden-skinned woman walk
in.
"Good morning," I
said. "They must like you."
She laughed pleasantly. "Hello. Weren't
they behaving?"
Under
the black beach robe her skin was a softer, more mellow gold, and it was her
eyes that held me. I could just see them under the wide-brimmed hat. Insect
legs wavered delicately round two points of purple light.
She walked over to a bank of mixed ferns and
stood looking at them, her ample hips cocked to one side.
The
ferns reached out toward her and trebled eagerly in their liquid fluted voices.
"Aren't
they sweet?" she said, stroking the fronds gently. "They need so much
affection."
Her
voice was low in the register, a breath of cool sand pouring, with a lilt that
gave it music.
"I've
just come to Vermillion Sands," she said, "and my apartment seems
awfully quiet. Perhaps if I had a flower, one would be enough, I shouldn't feel
so lonely."
I couldn't take my eyes off
her.
"Yes,"
I agreed, brisk and business-like. "What about something colorful? This
Sumatra Samphire, say? It's a pedigree mezzo-soprano from the same follicle as
the Bay-reuth Festival Prima Belladonna."
"No," she said.
"It looks rather cruel."
"Or
this Louisiana Lute Lily? If you thin out its S02 it'll play some
beautiful madrigals. I'll show you how to do it."
She
wasn't listening to me. Slowly her hands raised in front of her breasts so that
she almost seemed to be praying; she moved toward the counter on which the
Arachnid stood.
"How beautiful it is," she said,
gazing at the rich yellow and purple leaves hanging from the scarlet-ribbed
vibro-calyx.
I followed her across the floor and switched
on the Arachnid's audio so that she could hear it. Immediately the plant came
to life. The leaves stiffened and filled with color and the calyx inflated, its
ribs sprung tautly. A few sharp disconnected notes spat out.
"Beautiful, but
evil," I said.
"Evil?"
she repeated. "No, proud." She stepped closer to the orchid and
looked down into its huge malevolent head. The Arachnid quivered and the spines
on its stem arched and flexed menacingly.
"Careful,"
I warned her. "It's sensitive to the faintest respiratory sounds."
"Quiet,"
she said, waving me back. "I think it wants to sing."
"Those are only key fragments," I
told her. "It doesn't perform. I use it as a frequency—"
"Listen!" She
held my arm and squeezed it tightly.
A
low rhythmic fusion of melody had been coming from the plants around the shop,
and mounting above them I heard a single stronger voice calling out, at first a
thin high-pitched reed of sound that began to pulse and deepen and finally
swelled into full baritone, raising the other plants in chorus about itself.
I'd
never heard the Arachnid sing before and I was listening to it open-eared when
I felt a glow of heat burn against my arm. I turned round and saw the woman
staring intently at the plant, her skin aflame, the insects in her eyes
writhing insanely. The Arachnid stretched out toward her, calyx erect, leaves
like blood-red sabers.
I
stepped round her quickly and switched off the argon feed. The Arachnid sank to
a whimper, and around us there was a nightmarish babel of broken notes and
voices toppling from high C's and L's into discord. Then only a faint
whispering of leaves moved over the silence.
The
woman gripped the edge of the tank and gathered herself. Her skin dimmed and
the insects in her eyes slowed to a delicate wavering.
"Why did you turn it
off?" she asked heavily.
"I'm
sorry," I said. "But I've got ten thousand dollars worth of stock
here and that sort of twelve-tone emotional storm can blow a lot of valves.
Most of these plants aren't equipped for grand opera."
She
watched the Arachnid as the gas drained out of its calyx, and one by one its
leaves buckled and lost their color.
"How much is it?"
she asked me, opening her bag.
"It's
not for sale," I said. "Frankly I've no idea how it picked up those
bars—"
"Will
a thousand dollars be enough?" she asked, her eyes fixed on me steadily.
"I
can't," I told her. "I'd never be able to tune the others without it.
Anyway," I added, trying to smile, "that Arachnid would be dead in
ten minutes if you took it out of its vivarium. All these cylinders and leads
would look a little odd inside your lounge."
"Yes,
of course," she agreed, suddenly smiling back at me. "I was
stupid." She gave the orchid a last backward glance and strolled away
across the floor to the long Tchaikovsky section popular with the tourists.
"
'Pathétique,' " she read off a label at random.
"I'll take this."
I
wrapped up the scabia and slipped the instructional booklet into the crate,
keeping my eye on her all the time.
"Don't
look so alarmed," she said with amusement. "I've never heard anything
like that before."
I
wasn't alarmed. It was just that thirty years at Vermillion Sands had narrowed
my horizons.
"How
long are you staying at Vermillion Sands?" I asked.
"I
open at the Casino tonight," she said. She told me her name was Jane
Ciracylides and that she was a specialty singer.
"Why
don't you look in?" she asked, her eyes fluttering mischievously. "I
come on at eleven. You may find it interesting."
I did. The next morning Vermillion Sands
hummed. Jane created a sensation. After her performance 300 people swore they'd
seen everything from a choir of angels taking the vocal in the music of the
spheres to Alexander's Ragtime Band. As for myself, perhaps I'd listened to
too many flowers, but at least I knew where the scorpion on the balcony had
come from.
Tony
Miles had heard Sophie Tucker singing the St. Louis Blues, and Harry the elder
Bach conducting the B Minor Mass.
They
came round to the shop and argued over their respective performances while I
wresded with the flowers.
"Amazing,"
Tony exclaimed. "How does she do it? Tell me."
"The Heidelberg score," Harry
ecstased. "Sublime, absolute." He looked irritably at the flowers.
"Can't you keep these things quiet? They're making one hell of a
row."
They
were, and I had a shrewd idea why. The Arachnid was completely out of control,
and by the time I'd clamped it down in a weak saline it had blown out over $300
worth of shrubs.
"The
performance at the Casino last night was nothing on the one she gave here
yesterday," I told them. "The
Ring
of the Nibelungs played by Stan Kenton. That Arachnid went insane. I'm sure it
wanted to kill her."
Harry
watched the plant convulsing its leaves in rigid spasmic movements.
"If
you ask me it's in an advanced state of rut. Why should it want to kill
her?"
"Not
literally. Her voice must have overtones that irritate its calyx. None of the
other plants minded. They cooed like turtle doves when she touched them."
Tony shivered happily.
Light dazzled in the street
outside.
I
handed Tony the broom. "Here, lover, brace yourself on that. Miss
Ciracylides is dying to meet you."
Jane
came into the shop, wearing a flame yellow cocktail skirt and another of her
hats.
I introduced her to Harry
and Tony.
"The
flowers seem very quiet this morning," she said. "What's the matter
with them?"
"I'm
cleaning out the tanks," I told her. "By the way, we all want to
congratulate you on last night. How does it feel to be able to name your
fiftieth city?"
She smiled shyly and sauntered away round the
shop. As I knew she would, she stopped by the Arachnid and leveled her eyes at
it.
I wanted to see what she'd say, but Harry and
Tony were all around her, and soon got her up to my apartment, where they had a
hilarious morning playing the fool and raiding my scotch.
"What about coming out with us after the
show tonight?" Tony asked her. "We can go dancing at the
Flamingo."
"But you're both married," Jane
protested coyly. "Aren't you worried about your reputations?"
"Oh, we'll bring the girls," Harry
said airily. "And Steve here can come along and hold your coat."
We played i-Go together. Jane said she'd
never played the game before, but she had no difficulty picking up the rules,
and when she started sweeping the board with us I knew she was cheating.
Admittedly it isn't every day that you get a chance to play i-Go with a
golden-skinned woman with insects for eyes, but nevertheless I was annoyed.
Harry and Tony, of course, didn't mind.
"She's charming," Harry said, after
she'd left. "Who cares? It's a stupid game anyway." "I
care," I said. "She cheats."
The next three or four days at the shop were
an audio-vegetative armageddon. Jane came in every morning to look at the
Arachnid, and her presence was more than the flower could bear. Unfortunately I
couldn't starve the plants down below their thresholds. They needed exercise
and they had to have the Arachnid to lead them. But instead of running through
its harmonic scales the orchid only screeched and whined. It wasn't the noise,
which only a couple of dozen people complained about, but the damage being done
to their vibratory chords that worried me. Those in the 17th Century catalogues
stood up well to the strain, and the moderns were immune, but the Romantics
burst their calyxes by the score. By the third day after Jane's arrival I'd
lost $200 worth of Beethoven and more Mendelssohn and Schubert than I could
bear to think about.
Jane seemed oblivious to
the trouble she was causing me.
"What's
wrong with them all?" she asked, surveying the chaos of gas cylinders and
drip feeds spread across the floor.
"I don't think they like you," I
told her. "At least the Arachnid doesn't. Your voice may move men to
strange and wonderful visions, but it throws that orchid into acute
melancholia."
"Nonsense,"
she said, laughing at me. "Give it to me and I'll show you how to look
after it."
"Are
Tony and Harry keeping you happy?" I asked her. I was annoyed I couldn't
go down to the beach with them and instead had to spend my time draining tanks
and titrating up norm solutions, none of which ever worked.
"They're
very amusing," she said. "We play i-Go and I sing for them. But I
wish you could come out more often."
After
another two weeks I had to give up. I decided to close the plants down until
Jane had left Vermillion Sands. I knew it would take me three months to rescore
the stock, but I had no alternative.
The
next day I received a large order for mixed coloratura herbaceous from the
Santiago Garden Choir. They wanted delivery in three weeks.
"I'm sorry," Jane said, when she
heard I wouldn't be able to fill the order. "You must wish that I'd never
come to Vermillion Sands."
She stared thoughtfully
into one of the darkened tanks.
"Couldn't I score them
for you?" she suggested.
"No,
thanks,'' I said, laughing, "I've had enough of that already."
"Don't be silly, of
course I could."
I shook my head.
Tony and Harry told me I was crazy.
"Her
voice has a wide enough range," Tony said. "You admit it
yourself."
"What
have you got against her?" Harry asked. "She cheats at i-Go?"
"It's
nothing to do with that," I said. "But her voice has a wider range
than you think."
We
played i-Go at Jane's apartment. Jane won ten dollars from each of us.
"I
am lucky," she said, very pleased with herself. "I never seem to
lose." She counted up the bills and put them away carefully in her bag,
her golden skin glowing.
Then Santiago sent me a
repeat query.
I
found Jane down among the cafes, holding off a siege of admirers.
"Have
you given in yet?" she asked me, smiling at the young men.
"I
don't know what you're doing to me," I said, "but anything is worth
trying."
Back
at the shop I raised a bank of perennials up past their thresholds. Jane helped
me attach the gas and fluid lines.
"We'll
try these first," I said. "Frequencies 543-785. Here's the
score."
Jane
took off her hat and began to ascend the scale, her voice clear and pure. At
first the Columbine hesitated and Jane went down again and drew them along with
her. They went up a couple of octaves together and then the plants stumbled and
went off at a tangent of stepped chords.
"Try
K sharp," I said. I fed a little chlorous acid into the tank and the
Columbine followed her up eagerly, the infra-calyxes warbling delicate
variations on the treble clef.
"Perfect," I
said.
It took us only four hours to fill the order.
"You're
better than the Arachnid," I congratulated her. "How would you like a
job? I'll fit you out with a large cool tank and all the chlorine you can
breathe."
"Careful,"
she told me. "I may say yes. Why don't we re-score a few more of them
while we're about it?"
"You're tired," I
said. "Let's go and have a drink."
"Let
me try the Arachnid," she suggested. "That would be more of a
challenge."
Her
eyes never left the flower. I wondered what they'd do if I left them together.
Try to sing each other to death?
"No," I said.
"Tomorrow perhaps."
We
sat on the balcony together, glasses at our elbows, and talked the afternoon
away.
She
told me little about herself, but I gathered that her father had been a mining
engineer in Peru and her mother a dancer at a Lima vu-tavern. They'd wandered
from deposit to deposit, the father digging his concessions, the mother signing
on at the nearest bordello to pay the rent.
"She
only sang, of course," Jane added. "Until my father came." She
blew bubbles into her glass. "So you think I give them what they want at
the Casino. By the way, what do you see?"
"I'm
afraid I'm your one failure," I said. "Nothing. Except you."
She dropped her eyes. "That sometimes
happens," she said. "I'm glad this time."
A
million suns pounded inside me. Until then I'd been reserving judgment on
myself.
Harry and Tony were polite,
if disappointed.
"I
can't believe it," Harry said sadly. "I won't. How did you do
it?"
"That
mystical left-handed approach, of course," I told him. "Ail ancient
seas and dark wells."
"What's she like?" Tony asked
eagerly. "I mean, does she burn, or just tingle?"
Jane sang at the Casino every night from 11 to 3, but apart from that I suppose we were always together. Sometimes
in the late afternoons we'd drive out along the beach to the Scented Desert and
sit alone by one of the pools, watching the sun fall away behind the reefs and
hills, lulling ourselves on the heavy rose-sick air. And when the wind began to
blow cool across the sand we'd slip down into the water, bathe ourselves and
drive back to town, filling the streets and cafe terraces with jasmine and
musk-rose and helianthemum.
On other evenings we'd go down to one of the
quiet bars at Lagoon West, and have supper out on the flats, and Jane would
tease the waiters and sing honeybirds and angel-cakes to the children who came
in across the sand to watch her.
I realize now that I must have achieved a
certain notoriety along the beach, but I didn't mind giving the old women—and
beside Jane they all seemed to be old women —something to talk about. During
the Recess no one cared very much about anything, and for that reason I never
questioned myself too closely over my affair with Jane Ciracylides. As I sat on
the balcony with her looking out over the cool early evenings or felt her body
glowing beside me in the darkness I allowed myself few anxieties.
Absurdly, the only disagreement I ever had
with her was over her cheating.
I remember that I once taxed her with it.
"Do you know you've taken over $500 from
me, Jane? You're still doing it. Even now!"
She laughed impishly. "Do I cheat? I'll
let you win one day."
"But why do you?" I insisted.
"It's more fun to cheat," she said.
"Otherwise it's so boring."
"Where will you go when you leave
Vermillion Sands?" I asked her.
She looked at me in surprise. "Why do
you say that? I don't think I shall ever leave."
"Don't tease me, Jane. You're a child of
another world than this."
"My father came from Peru," she reminded me.
"But you didn't get your voice from
him," I said. "I wish I could have heard your mother sing. Had she a
better voice than yours, Jane?"
"She thought so. My father couldn't stand either of us."
That was the evening I last saw Jane. We'd
changed, and in the half an hour before she left for the Casino we sat on the
balcony and I listened to her voice, like a spectral fountain, pour its golden
luminous notes into the air. The music remained with me even after she'd gone,
hanging faintly in the darkness around her chair.
I
felt curiously sleepy, almost sick on the air she'd left behind, and at 11:30,
when I knew she'd be appearing on stage at the Casino, I went out for a walk
along the beach and a coffee.
As I
left the elevator I heard music coming from the shop.
At
first I thought I'd left one of the audio switches on, but I knew the voice
only too well.
The
windows of the shop had been shuttered, so I got in through the passage which
led from the garage courtyard round at the back of the apartment house.
The
lights had been turned out, but a brilliant glow filled the shop, throwing a
golden fire onto the tanks along the counters. Across the ceiling liquid colors
danced in reflection.
The music I had heard
before, but only in overture.
The
Arachnid had grown to three times its size. It towered nine feet high out of
the shattered lid of the control tank, leaves tumid and inflamed, its calyx as
large as a bucket, raging insanely.
Arched forward into it, her
head thrown back, was Jane.
I ran
over to her, my eyes filling with light, and grabbed her arm, trying to pull
her away from it.
"Jane!" I shouted
over the noise. "Get down!"
She
flung my hand away. In her eyes, fleetingly, was a look of shame.
While
I was sitting on the stairs in the entrance Tony and Harry drove up.
"Where's
Jane?" Harry asked. "Has anything happened to her? We were down at
the Casino." They both turned toward the music. "What the hell's
going on?"
Tony
peered at me suspiciously. "Steve, anything wrong?"
Harry dropped the bouquet he was carrying and
started toward the rear entrance.
"Harry!" I
shouted after him. "Get back!"
Tony held my shoulder.
"Is Jane in there?"
I caught them as they
opened the door into the shop.
"Good God!" Harry yelled. "Let
go of me, you fool!" He struggled to get away from me. "Steve, it's
trying to kill her!"
I jammed the door shut and held them back.
I never saw.Jane again. The three of us
waited in my apartment. When the music died away we went down and found the
shop in darkness. The Arachnid had shrunk to its normal size.
The next day it died.
Where
Jane went to I don't know. Not long afterward the Recess ended, and the big
government schemes came along and started up all the clocks and kept us too
busy working off the lost time to worry about a few bruised petals. Harry told
me that Jane had been seen on her way through Red Beach, and I heard recently
that someone very like her was doing the nightclubs this side out of
Pernambuco.
So
if any of you around there keep a choro-florist's and have a Khan-Arachnid
orchid, look out for a golden-skinned woman with insects for eyes. Perhaps
she'll play i-Go with you, and I'm sorry to have to say it, but she'll always
cheat.
CASEY AGONISTES
Richard McKenna
Richard Milton McKenna (1912-1964) was the author of the
best-selling Harper prize novel. The Sand Pebbles (1962). Born in Idaho, McKenna had "a
desert and cowboy type youth" and joined the Navy promptly at eighteen. He
spent most of ten years stationed in China, decided to become a writer while on
postwar assignment to the Public Information Office. In 1956, three years
after his discharge (as Chief Machinist's Mate), he graduated from the
University of North Carolina, got married the next day, and began writing.
He
was a slow, painstaking writer. His unfinished second novel. The Sons of Martha, was published posthumously by Harper and Row.
His handful of short stories have been widely reprinted, and one, previously
unpublished, appeared in Damon Knight's 1966 Orbit, and received a Nebula Award in 1967.
"Casey
Agonistes" was McKenna's first published story, in the September, 1958, Fantasy & Science Fiction. It was reprinted in the 4th SF Annual and in
the anthology. The Dark Side (Doubleday,
1965). Another story, "Mine Own Ways", was in the 6th Annual.
■
■■■
You can't just plain die.
You got to do it by the book.
That's
how come I'm here in this TB ward with nine other recruits. Basic training to
die.
You
do it by stages. First a big ward, you walk around and go out and they call you
mister. Then, if you got what it takes, a promotion to this isolation ward and
they call you charles. You can't go nowhere, you meet the masks, and you get
the feel of being dead.
Being
dead is being weak and walled off. You hear car noises and see little
doll-people down on the sidewalks, but when they come to visit you they wear
white masks and
nightgowns and talk past you in the wrong
voices. They're scared you'll rub some off on them. You would, too, if you
knew how.
Nobody
ever visits me. I had practice being dead before I come here. Maybe that's how
I got to be charles so quick.
It's
easy, playing dead here. You eat your pills, make out to sleep in the quiet
hours and drink your milk like a good little charles. You grin at their phony
joshing about how healthy you look and feel. You all know better, but them's
the rules.
Sick
call is when they really make you know it. It's a parade—the head doctor and
nurse, the floor nurse Mary Howard and two interns, all in masks and
nightgowns. Mary pushes the wheeled rack with our fever charts on it. The doc
is a tall skinhead with wooden eyes and pinchnose glasses. The head nurse is
fat, with little pig eyes and a deep voice.
The
doc can't see, hear, smell or touch you. He looks at your reflection in the
chart and talks about you like you was real, but it's Mary that pulls down the
cover and opens your pajama coat, and the interns poke and look and listen and
tell the doc what they see and hear. He asks them questions for you to answer.
You tell them how good you feel and they tell him. He ain't supposed to get
contaminated.
Mary's
small, dark and sweet and the head nurse gives her a bad time. One intern is
small and dark like Mary, with soft black eyes and very gentle. The other one
is pink and chubby.
The
doc's voice is high and thin, like he ain't all there below decks. The head
nurse snaps at Mary, snips at the interns, and puts a kind of dog wiggle in
her voice when she talks to the doc.
I'm
glad not to know what's under any of their masks, except maybe Mary's, because
I can likely imagine better faces for them than God did. The head nurse makes
rounds, riding the book. When she catches us out of line, like smoking or being
up in a quiet hour, she gives Mary hell.
She
gives us hell too, like we was babies. She kind of hints that if we ain't
respectful to her and obey her rules maybe she won't let us die after all.
Christ, how I hate that
hag! I hope I meet her in hell.
That's
how it struck me, first day or two in isolation. I'd looked around for old
shipmates, like a guy does, but didn't see any. On the third day one recognized
me. I thought I knew that gravel voice, but even after he told me I couldn't
hardly believe it was old Slop Chute Hewitt.
He
was skin and bones and his blue eyes had a kind of puzzled look like I saw in
them once years ago when a big limey sucker punched him in Nagasaki Joe's. When
I remembered that, it made me know, all right.
He
said glad to see me there and we both laughed. Some of the others shuffled over
in striped bathrobes and all of a sudden I was in like Flynn, knowing Slop
Chute. I found out they called the head doc Uncle Death. The fat nurse was Mama
Death. The blond intern was Pink Waldo, the dark one Curly Waldo, and Mary was
Mary. Knowing things like that is a kind of password.
They
said Curly Waldo was sweet on Mary, but he was a poor Italian. Pink Waldo come
of good family and was trying to beat him out. They were pulling for Curly
Waldo.
When
they left, Slop Chute and me talked over old times in China. I kept seeing him
like he was on the John
D. Edwards, sitting
with a cup of coffee topside by the after fire-room hatch, while his snipes
turned to down below. He wore bleached dungarees and shined shoes and he looked
like a lord of the earth. His broad face and big belly. The way he stoked chow
into himself in the guinea pullman— that's what give him his name. The way he
took aboard beer and samshu in the Kongmoon Happiness Garden. The way he swung
the little ne-sans dancing in the hotels on Skibby Hill. Now .. . Godalmighty! It made me know.
But he still had the big
jack lantern grin.
"Remember
little Connie that danced at the Palais?" he asked.
I remember her, half
Portygee, cute as hell.
"You
know, Charley, now I'm headed for scrap, the on-liest one damn thing I'm sorry
for is I didn't shack with her when I had the chance."
"She was nice," I
said.
"She
was green fire in the velvet, Charley. I had her a few times when I was on the Monocacy. She wanted to shack and I wouldn't never do
it. Christ, Christ, I wish I did, now!"
"I ain't sorry for anything, that I can
think of."
"You'll come to it, sailor. For every
guy there's some one thing. Remember how Connie used to put her finger on her
nose like a Jap girl?"
"Now, Mr. Noble, you mustn't keep arthur
awake in quiet hour. Lie down yourself, please."
It was Mama Death, sneaked
up on us.
"Now
rest like a good boy, charles, and we'll have you home before you know
it," she told me on her way out. v
I thought a thought at her.
The ward had green-gray linoleum, high,
narrow windows, a spar-color overhead, and five bunks on a side. My bunk was
at one end next to the solarium. Slop Chute was across from me in the middle.
Six of us was sailors, three soldiers, and there was one marine.
We
got mucho sack time, training for the long sleep. The marine bunked next to me
and I saw a lot of him.
He
was a strange guy. Name of Carnahan, with a pointed nose and a short upper lip
and a go-to-hell stare. He most always wore his radio earphones and he was all
the time grinning and chuckling like he was in a private world from the rest of
us.
It
wasn't the program that made him grin, either, like I thought first. He'd do it
even if some housewife was yapping about how to didify the dumplings. He
carried on worst during sick call. Sometimes Uncle Death looked across almost
like he could hear it direct.
I
asked him about it and he put me off, but finally he told me. Seems he could
hypnotize himself to see a big ape and then make the ape clown around. He told
me I might could get to see it too. I wanted to try, so we did.
"He's
there," Carnahan would say. "Sag your eyes, look out the corners. He
won't be plain at first.
"Just
expect him, he'll come. Don't want him to do anything.
You just feel.
He'll do what's
natural," he kept telling me.
I
got where I could see the ape—Casey, Carnahan called him—in flashes. Then one
day Mama Death was chewing out Mary and I saw him plain. He come up behind Mama
and—I busted right out laughing.
He
looked like a bowlegged man in an ape suit covered with red-brown hair. He
grinned and made faces with a mouth full of big yellow teeth and he was
furnished like John Keeno himself. I roared.
"Put on your phones so
you'll have an excuse for laughing," Carnahan whispered. "Only you
and me can see him, you know."
Fixing to be dead, you're ready for God knows
what, but Casey was sure something.
"Hell,
no, he ain't real," Carnahan said. "We ain't so real ourselves any
more. That's why we can see him."
Carnahan
told me okay to try and let Slop Chute in on it. It ended we cut the whole gang
in, going slow so the masks wouldn't get suspicious.
It
bothered Casey at first, us all looking at him. It was like we all had a string
on him and he didn't know who to mind. He backed and filled and tacked and
yawed all over the ward not able to steer himself. Only when Mama Death was
there and Casey went after her, then it was like all the strings pulled the
same way.
The
more we watched him the plainer and stronger he got till finally he started
being his own man. He came and went as he pleased and we never knew what he'd
do next except that there'd be a laugh in it. Casey got more and more there for
us, but he never made a sound.
He
made a big difference. We all wore our earphones and giggled like idiots. Slop
Chute wore his big sideways grin more often. Old Webster almost stopped
griping.
There
was a man filling in for a padre came to visitate us every week. Casey would
sit on his knee and wiggle and drool, with one finger between those strong,
yellow teeth. The man said the radio was a Godsend to us patient spirits in our
hour of trial. He stopped coming.
Casey
made a real show out of sick call. He kissed Mama Death smack on her mask,
danced with her and bit her on the rump. He rode piggy back on Uncle Death. He
even took a hand in Mary's romance.
One
Waldo always went in on each side of a bunk to look, listen and feel for Uncle.
Mary could go on either side. We kept count of whose side she picked and how
close she stood to him. That's how we figured Pink Waldo was ahead.
Well,
Casey started to shoo her gently in by Curly Waldo and then crowd her closer to
him. And, you know, the count began to change in Curly's favor. Casey had
something.
If
no masks were around to bedevil, Casey would dance and turn handsprings. He
made us all feel good.
Uncle
Death smelled a rat and had the radio turned off during sick call and quiet
hours. But he couldn't cut off Casey.
Something went wrong with Roby, the cheerful
black boy next to Slop Chute. The masks were all upset about it and finally
Mary come told him on the sly. He wasn't going to make it. They were going to
flunk him back to the big ward and maybe back to the world.
Mary's
good that way. We never see her face, of course, but I always imagine for her a
mouth like Venus has, in that picture you see her standing in the shell.
When
Roby had to go, he come around to each bunk and said good-by. Casey stayed
right behind him with his tongue stuck out. Roby kept looking around for Casey,
but of course he couldn't see him.
He
turned around, just before he left the ward, and all of a sudden Casey was back
in the middle and scowling at him. Roby stood looking at Casey with the saddest
face I ever saw him wear. Then Casey grinned and waved a hand. Roby grinned
back and tears run down his black face. He waved and shoved off.
Casey
took to sleeping in Roby's bunk till another recruit come in.
One
day two masked orderlies loaded old Webster the whiner onto a go-to-Jesus cart
and wheeled him off to x-ray. They said. But later one came back and wouldn't
look at us and pushed Webster's locker out and we knew. The masks had him in a
quiet room for the graduation exercises.
They
always done that, Slop Chute told me, so's not to hurt the morale of the guys
not able to make the grade yet. Trouble was, when a guy went to x-ray on a
go-to-Jesus cart he never knew till he got back whether he was going to see the
gang again.
Next
morning when Uncle Death fell in for sick call Casey come bouncing down the
ward and hit him a haymaker plumb on the mask.
I
swear the bald-headed bastard staggered. I know his glasses fell off and Pink
Waldo caught them. He said something about a moment of vertigo, and made a
quick job of sick call. Casey stayed right behind him and kicked his stern post
every step he took.
Mary favored Curly Waldo's side that day
without any help from Casey.
After that Mama Death really got ugly. She
slobbered loving care all over us to keep us from knowing what we was there
for. We got baths and back rubs we didn't want. Quiet hour had to start on the
dot and be really quiet. She was always reading Mary off in whispers, like she
knew it bothered us.
Casey
followed her around aping her duck waddle and poking her behind now and again.
We laughed and she thought it was at her and I guess it was. So she got Uncle
Death to order the routine temperatures taken rectally, which she knew we
hated. We stopped laughing and she knocked off the rectal temperatures. It was
a kind of unspoken agreement. Casey give her a worse time than ever, but we
saved our laughing till she was gone.
Poor
Slop Chute couldn't do anything about his big, lopsided grin that was louder
than a belly laugh. Mama give him a real bad time. She arthured the hell out of
him.
He
was coming along first rate, had another hemorrhage, and they started taking
him to the clinic on a go-to-Jesus cart instead of in a chair. He was supposed
to use ducks and a bedpan instead of going to the head, but he saved it up and
after lights out we used to help him walk to the head. That made his reflection
in the chart wrong and got him in deeper with Uncle Death.
I
talked to him a lot, mostly about Connie. He said he dreamed about her pretty
often now.
"I figure it means I'm near ready for
the deep six, Charley."
"Figure you'll see Connie then?"
"No.
Just hope I won't have to go on thinking about her then. I want it to be all
night in and no reveille."
"Yeah," I said,
"me too. What ever become of Connie?"
"I
heard she ate poison right after the Reds took over Shanghai. I wonder if she
ever dreamed about me?"
"I bet she did, Slop Chute," I
said. "She likely used to wake up screaming and she ate the poison just to
get rid of you."
He put on his big grin.
"You regret something
too, Charley. You find it yet?"
"Well,
maybe," I said. "Once on a stormy night at sea on the Black Hawk I had a chance to push King Brody over the
side. I'm sorry now I didn't."
"Just come to
you?"
"Hell,
no, it come to me three days later when he give me a week's restriction in
Tsingtao. I been sorry ever since."
"No. It'll smell you
out, Charley. You wait."
Casey
was shadow boxing down the middle of the ward as I shuffled back to my bunk.
It must've been spring because the days were
longer. One night, right after the nurse come through, Casey and Carna-han and
me helped Slop Chute walk to the head. While he was there he had another
hemorrhage.
Carnahan
started for help but Casey got in the way and motioned him back and we knew
Slop Chute didn't want it.
We
pulled Slop Chute's pajama top off and steadied him. He went on his knees in
front of the bowl and the soft, bubbling cough went on for a long time. We kept
flushing it. Casey opened the door and went out to keep away the nurse.
Finally
it pretty well stopped. Slop Chute was too weak to stand. We cleaned him up and
I put my pajama top on him, and we stood him up. If Casey hadn't took half the
load, we'd'a never got him back to his bunk.
Godalmighty!
I used to carry hundred-kilo sacks of cement like they was nothing.
We
went back and cleaned up the head. I washed out the pajama top and draped it on
the radiator. I was in a cold sweat and my face burned when I turned in.
Across
the ward Casey was sitting like a statue beside Slop Chute's bunk.
Next
day was Friday, because Pink Waldo made some crack about fish to Curly Waldo
when they formed up for sick call. Mary moved closer to Curly Waldo and gave
Pink Waldo a cold look. That was good.
Slop
Chute looked waxy, and Uncle Death seemed to see it because a gleam come into
his wooden eyes. Both Waldos listened all over Slop Chute and told uncle what
they heard in their secret language. Uncle nodded, and Casey thumbed his nose
at him.
No
doubt about it, the ways was greased for Slop Chute. Mama Death come back soon
as she could and began to loosen the chocks. She slobbered arthurs all over
Slop Chute and flittered around like women do when they smell a wedding. Casey
give her extra special hell, and we all laughed right out and she hardly
noticed.
That
afternoon two orderly-masks come with a go-to-Jesus cart and wanted to take
Slop Chute to x-ray. Casey climbed on the cart and scowled at them.
Slop Chute told 'em shove off, he wasn't
going.
They
got Mary and she told Slop Chute please go, it was doctor's orders.
Sorry, no, he said.
"Please, for me, Slop
Chute," she begged.
She
knows our right names—that's one reason we love her. But Slop Chute shook his
head, and his big jaw bone stuck out.
Mary—she
had to then—called Mama Death. Mama waddled in, and Casey spit in her mask.
"Now,
arthur, what is this, arthur, you know we want to help you get well and go
home, arthur," she arthured at Slop Chute. "Be a good boy now,
arthur, and go along to the clinic."
She
motioned the orderlies to pick him up anyway. Casey hit one in the mask and
Slop Chute growled, "Sheer off, you bastards!"
The orderlies hesitated.
Mama's
little eyes squinted and she wiggled her hands at them. "Let's not be
naughty, arthur. Doctor knows best, arthur."
The
orderlies looked at Slop Chute and at each other. Casey wrapped his arms and
legs around Mama Death and began chewing on her neck. He seemed to mix right
into her, someway, and she broke and run out of the ward.
She
come right back, though, trailing Uncle Death. Casey met him at the door and
beat hell out of him all the way to Slop Chute's bunk. Mama sent Mary for the
chart, and Uncle Death studied Slop Chute's reflection for a minute. He looked
pale and swayed a little from Casey's beating.
He turned toward Slop Chute and breathed in
deep and Casey was on him again. Casey wrapped his arms and legs around him and
chewed at his mask with those big yellow teeth. Casey's hair bristled and his
eyes were red as the flames of hell.
Uncle
Death staggered back across the ward and fetched up against Carnahan's bunk.
The other masks were scared spitless, looking all around, kind of knowing.
Casey
pulled away, and Uncle Death said maybe he was wrong, schedule it for tomorrow.
All the masks left in a hurry except Mary. She went back to Slop Chute and took
his hand.
"I'm sorry, Slop Chute," she
whispered. "Bless you, Connie," he said, and grinned. It was the last
thing I ever heard him say.
Slop Chute went to sleep, and Casey sat
beside his bunk. He motioned me off when I wanted to help Slop Chute to the
head after lights out. I turned in and went to sleep.
I
don't know what woke me. Casey was moving around fidgety-like, but of course
not making a sound. I could hear the others stirring and whispering in the dark
too.
Then
I heard a muffled noise—the bubbling cough again, and spitting. Slop Chute was
having another hemorrhage and he had his head under the blankets to hide the
sound. Carnahan started to get up. Casey waved him down.
I
saw a deeper shadow high in the dark over Slop Chute's bunk. It came down ever
so gently and Casey would push it back up again. The muffled coughing went on.
Casey
had a harder time pushing back the shadow. Finally he climbed on the bunk
straddle of Slop Chute and kept a steady push against it.
The
blackness came down anyway, little by little. Casey strained and shifted his
footing. I could hear him grunt and hear his joints crack.
I
was breathing forced draft with my heart like to pull off its bed bolts. I
heard other bedsprings creaking. Somebody across from me whimpered low, but it
was sure never Slop Chute that done it.
Casey
went to his knees, his hands forced almost level with his head. He swung his
head back and forth and I saw his lips curled back from the big teeth clenched
tight together.... Then he had the
blackness on his shoulders like the weight of the whole world.
Casey
went down on hands and knees with his back arched like a bridge. Almost I
thought I heard him grunt... and
he gained a little.
Then
the blackness settled heavier, and I heard Casey's tendons pull out and his
bones snap. Casey and Slop Chute disappeared under the blackness, and it
overflowed from there over the whole bed ...
and more . . . and it seemed to fill the whole ward.
It
wasn't like going to sleep, but I don't know anything it was like.
The masks must've towed off
Slop Chute's hulk in the night, because it was gone when I woke up. So was
Casey.
Casey
didn't show up for sick call and I knew then how much he meant to me. With him
around to fight back I didn't feel as dead as they wanted me to. Without him I
felt deader than ever. I even almost liked Mama Death when she charlesed me.
Mary
came on duty that morning with a diamond on her third finger and a brighter
sparkle in her eye. It was a little diamond, but it was Curly Waldo's and it
kind of made up for Slop Chute.
I
wished Casey was there to see it. He would've danced all around her and kissed
her nice, the way he often did. Casey loved Mary.
It
was Saturday, I know, because Mama Death come in and told some of us we could
be wheeled to a special church hooraw before breakfast next morning if we
wanted. We said no thanks. But it was a hell of a Saturday without Casey.
Sharkey Brown said it for all of us—"With Casey gone, this place is like a
morgue again."
Not even Carnahan could call him up.
"Sometimes
I think I feel him stir, and then again I ain't sure," he said. "It
beats hell where he's went to."
Going
to sleep that night was as much like dying as it could be for men already dead.
Music from far off woke me up when it was
just getting
light. I was going to try to cork off again,
when I saw Carna-han was awake.
"Casey's around
somewhere," he whispered.
"Where?" I asked,
looking around. "I don't see him."
"I feel him,"
Carnahan said. "He's around."
The
others began to wake up and look around. It was like the night Casey and Slop
Chute went under. Then something moved in the solarium....
It was Casey.
He
come in the ward slow and bashful-like, jerking his head all around, with his
eyes open wide, and looking scared we was going to throw something at him. He
stopped in the middle of the ward.
"Yea, Casey!"
Carnahan said in a low-clear voice.
Casey looked at him sharp.
"Yea,
Casey!" we all said. "Come aboard, you hairy old bastard!"
Casey
shook hands with himself over his head and went into his dance. He grinned . .
. and I swear to God it was Slop Chute's big, lopsided grin he had on.
For the first time in my whole damn life I
wanted to cry.
A DEATH
IN THE
HOUSE
Clifford D. Simak
Clifford D. Simak left his job as news editor of the
Minneapolis Star
in 1959 to initiate an
educational program, the Science Reading Series, for the Star's sister paper,
the Tribune. The program is now used in 3,500 classrooms,
and has won him a Westinghouse— American Association for the Advancement of
Science Award (1966) and a Minnesota Academy of Science Award (1967) to put
next to his 1953 International Fantasy Award (for City, the novel-length
collection of his "Webster Family" stories), and his two "Hugo's"
(for the novelette, "The Big Front Yard", in 1958, and the novel. Way
Station, 1963).
Born
in 1904 on a Wisconsin farm, Simak worked his way through a one-year teacher's
training course, then taught rural school to earn enough to enter the
University of Wisconsin; but the depression hit early in the midwest farm
country, and in 1929 he left college for his first newspaper job, on the Iron
River, Michigan, Reporter. In 1931, when his first science-fiction story was
published, he was editor of the Reporter. Over
the next few years, he changed jobs and markets regularly, producing only a
handful of science-fiction stories; but by 1939, when he started on the Star,
he had settled down to (what was to remain for twenty years) a fairly steady
production of four or five science-fiction stories a year.
He
has published twelve novels and short-story collections, and three books of
non-fiction. Most recent: Trilabile, Dinosaur and Man (St. Martin's Press, 1966) and Why Call Them Back from Heaven?
(Doubleday, 1967). At present, he divides his time between a weekly science
column for the Star,
work on his Science Reader
Series, and turning out approximately one science-fiction novel a year. A new
novel. The Werewolf Project,
is due from Putnam's
shortly.
"A
Death in the House" was first published in Galaxy, October, 1959, and reprinted in the 5th SF
Annual and in Ideas
in Literature (Merrill,
1966).
HBBB
Oldmoseabrams was out hunting cows when he found the alien.
He didn't know it was an alien, but it was alive and it was in a lot of trouble
and Old Mose, despite everything the neighbors said about him, was not the
kind of man who could bear to leave a sick thing out there in the woods.
It
was a horrid-looking thing, green and shiny, with some purple spots on it, and
it was repulsive even twenty feet away. And it stank.
It
had crawled, or tried to crawl, into a clump of hazel brush, but hadn't made
it. The head part was in the brush and the rest lay out there naked in the
open. Every now and then the parts that seemed to be arms and hands clawed
feebly at the ground, trying to force itself deeper in the brush, but it was
too weak; it never moved an inch.
It
was groaning, too, but not too loud—just the kind of keening sound a lonesome
wind might make around a wide, deep eave. But there was more in it than just
the sound of winter wind; there was a frightened, desperate note that made the
hair stand up on Old Mose's nape.
Old
Mose stood there for quite a spell, making up his mind what he ought to do
about it, and a while longer after that working up his courage, although most
folks offhand would have said that he had plenty. But this was the sort of
situation that took more than just ordinary screwed-up courage. It took a lot
of foolhardiness.
But
this was a wild, hurt thing and he couldn't leave it there, so he walked up to
it and knelt down, and it was pretty hard to look at, though there was a sort
of fascination in its repulsiveness that was hard to figure out—as if it were
so horrible that it dragged one to it. And it stank in a way that no one had
ever smelled before.
Mose,
however, was not finicky. In the neighborhood, he was not well known for
fastidity. Ever since his wife had died almost ten years before, he had lived
alone on his untidy farm and the housekeeping that he did was the scandal of
all the neighbor women. Once a year, if he got around to it, he sort of
shoveled out the house, but the rest of the year he just let things accumulate.
So
he wasn't as upset as some might have been with the way the creature smelled.
But the sight of it upset him, and it took him quite a while before he could
bring himself to touch it, and when he finally did, he was considerably surprised.
He had been prepared for it to be either cold or slimy, or maybe even both. But
it was neither. It was warm and hard and it had a clean feel to it, and he was
reminded of the way a green corn stalk would feel.
He
slid his hand beneath the hurt thing and pulled it gently from the clump of
hazel brush and turned it over so he could see its face. It hadn't any face. It
had an enlargement at the top of it, like a flower on top of a stalk, although
its body wasn't any stalk, and there was a fringe around this enlargement that
wiggled like a can of worms, and it was then that Mose almost turned around and
ran.
But he stuck it out.
He
squatted there, staring at the no-face with the fringe of worms, and he got
cold all over and his stomach doubled up on him and he was stiff with
fright—and the fright got worse when it seemed to him that the keening of the
thing was coming from the worms.
Mose
was a stubborn man. One had to be stubborn to run a runty farm like this.
Stubborn and insensitive in a lot of ways. But not insensitive, of course, to a
thing in pain.
Finally he was able to pick it up and hold it
in his arms and there was nothing to it, for it didn't weigh much. Less than a
half-grown shoat, he figured.
He
went up the woods path with it, heading back for home, and it seemed to him the
smell of it was less. He was hardly scared at all and he was warm again and not
cold all over.
For
the thing was quieter now and keening just a little. And although he could not
be sure of it, there were times when it seemed as if the thing were snuggling
up to him, the way a scared and hungry baby will snuggle to any grown person
that comes and picks it up.
Old
Mose reached the buildings and he stood out in the yard a minute, wondering
whether he should take it to the barn or house. The barn, of course, was the
natural place for it, for it wasn't human—it wasn't even as close to human as a
dog or cat or sick lamb would be.
He
didn't hesitate too long, however. He took it into the house and laid it on what
he called a bed, next to the kitchen stove. He got it straightened out all neat
and orderly and pulled a dirty blanket over it, and then went to the stove and
stirred up the fire until there was some flame.
Then
he pulled up a chair beside the bed and had a good, hard, wondering look at
this thing he had brought home. It had quieted down a lot and seemed more
comfortable than it had out in the woods. He tucked the blanket snug around it
with a tenderness that surprised himself. He wondered what he had that it
might eat, and even if he knew, how he'd manage feeding it, for it seemed to
have no mouth.
"But
you don't need to worry none," he told it. "Now that I got you under
a roof, you'll be all right. I don't know too much about it, but I'll take care
of you the best I can."
By
now it was getting on toward evening, and he looked out the window and saw that
the cows he had been hunting had come home by themselves.
"I
got to go get the milking done and the other chores," he told the thing
lying on the bed, "but it won't take me long. I'll be right back."
Old
Mose loaded up the stove so the kitchen would stay warm and he tucked the thing
in once again, then got his milk pails and went down to the barn.
He
fed the sheep and pigs and horses and he milked the cows. He hunted eggs and
shut the chicken house. He pumped a tank of water.
Then he went back to the house.
It
was dark now and he lit the oil lamp on the table, for he was against
electricity. He'd refused to sign up when REA had run out the line and a lot of
the neighbors had gotten sore at him for being unco-operative. Not that he
cared, of course.
He
had a look at the thing upon the bed. It didn't seem to be any better, or any
worse, for that matter. If it had been a sick lamb or an ailing calf, he could
have known right off how it was getting on, but this thing was different. There
was no way to tell.
He fixed himself some supper and ate it and
wished he knew how to feed the thing. And he wished, too, that he knew how to
help it. He'd got it under shelter and he had it warm, but was that right or
wrong for something like this? He had no idea.
He
wondered if he should try to get some help, then felt squeamish about asking
help when he couldn't say exactly what had to be helped. But then he wondered
how he would feel himself if he were in a far, strange country, all played out
and sick, and no one to get him any help because they didn't know exactly what
he was.
That
made up his mind for him and he walked over to the phone. But should he call a
doctor or a veterinarian? He decided to call the doctor because the thing was
in the house. If it had been in the barn, he would have called the veterinarian.
He
was on a rural line and the hearing wasn't good and he was halfway deaf, so he
didn't use the phone too often. He had told himself at times it was nothing but
another aggravation and there had been a dozen times he had threatened to have
it taken out. But now he was glad he hadn't.
The
operator got old Doctor Benson and they couldn't hear one another too well, but
Mose finally made the doctor understand who was calling and that he needed him
and the doctor said he'd come.
With
some relief, Mose hung up the phone and was just standing there, not doing
anything, when he was struck by the thought that there might be others of these
things down there in the woods. He had no idea what they were or what they
might be doing or where they might be going, but it was pretty evident that the one upon the bed was some sort of
stranger from a very distant place. It stood to reason that there might be more
than one of them, for far traveling was a lonely business and anyone—or
anything —would like to have some company along.
He
got the lantern down off the peg and lit it and went stumping out the door. The
night was as black as a stack of cats and the lantern light was feeble, but
that made not a bit of difference, for Mose knew this farm of his like the back
of his hand.
He
went down the path into the woods. It was a spooky place, but it took more than
woods at night to spook Old Mose. At the place where he had found the thing, he
looked around, pushing through the brush and holding the lantern high so he could
see a bigger area, but he didn't find another one of them.
He
did find something else, though—a sort of outsize birdcage made of metal
lattice work that had wrapped itself around an eight-inch hickory tree. He
tried to pull it loose, but it was jammed so tight that he couldn't budge it.
He
sighted back the way it must have come. He could see where it had plowed its
way through the upper branches of the trees, and out beyond were stars, shining
bleakly with the look of far away.
Mose
had no doubt that the thing lying on his bed beside the kitchen stove had come
in this birdcage contraption. He marveled some at that, but he didn't fret
himself too much, for the whole thing was so unearthly that he knew he had
little chance of pondering it out.
He
walked back to the house and he scarcely had the lantern blown out and hung
back on its peg than he heard a car drive up.
The
doctor, when he came up to the door, became a little grumpy at seeing Old Mose
standing there.
"You
don't look sick to me," the doctor said. "Not sick enough to drag me
clear out here at night."
"I ain't sick,"
said Mose.
"Well,
then," said the doctor, more grumpily than ever, "what did you mean
by phoning me?"
"I
got someone who is sick," said Mose. "I hope you can help him. I would have tried myself, but I don't know how to go about it."
The
doctor came inside and Mose shut the door behind him.
"You got something
rotten in here?" asked the doctor.
"No,
it's just the way he smells. It was pretty bad at first, but I'm getting used
to it by now."
The
doctor saw the thing lying on the bed and went over to it. Old Mose heard him
sort of gasp and could see him standing there, very stiff and straight. Then he
bent down and had a good look at the critter on the bed.
When
he straightened up and turned around to Mose, the only thing that kept him from
being downright angry was that he was so flabbergasted.
"Mose," he yelled, "what is this?"
"I don't know," said Mose. "I
found it in the woods and it was hurt and wailing and I couldn't leave it
there." "You think it's sick?"
"I
know it is," said Mose. "It needs help awful bad. I'm afraid it's
dying."
The
doctor turned back to the bed again and pulled the blanket down, then went and
got the lamp so that he could see. He looked the critter up and down, and he
prodded it with a skittish finger, and he made the kind of mysterious clucking
sound that only doctors make.
Then
he pulled the blanket back over it again and took the lamp back to the table.
"Mose," he said,
"I can't do a thing for it."
"But you're a
doctor!"
"A
human doctor, Mose. I don't know what this thing is, but it isn't human. I
couldn't even guess what is wrong with it, if anything. And I wouldn't know what
could be safely done for it even if I could diagnose its illness. I'm not even
sure it's an animal. There are a lot of things about it that argue it's a
plant."
Then
the doctor asked Mose straight out how he came to find it and Mose told him
exactly how it happened. But he didn't tell him anything about the birdcage,
for when he thought about it, it sounded so fantastic that he couldn't bring
himself to tell it. Just finding the critter and having it here was bad enough,
without throwing in the birdcage.
"I
tell you what," the doctor said. "You got something here that's
outside all human knowledge. I doubt there's ever been a thing like this seen
on Earth before. I have no idea what it
is and I wouldn't try to guess. If I were you, I'd get in touch with the
university up at Madison. There might be someone there who could get it figured
out. Even if they couldn't they'd be interested. They'd want to study it."
Mose
went to the cupboard and got the cigar box almost full of silver dollars and
paid the doctor. The doctor put the dollars in his pocket, joshing Mose about
his eccentricity.
But
Mose was stubborn about his silver dollars. "Paper money don't seem legal,
somehow," he declared. "I like the feel of silver and the way it
clinks. It's got authority."
The doctor left and he didn't seem as upset
as Mose had been afraid he might be. As soon as he was gone, Mose pulled up a
chair and sat down beside the bed.
It
wasn't right, he thought, that the thing should be so sick and no one to
help—no one who knew any way to help it.
He
sat in the chair and listened to the ticking of the clock, loud in the kitchen
silence, and the crackling of the wood burning in the stove.
Looking
at the thing lying on the bed, he had an almost fierce hope that it could get
well again and stay with him. Now that its birdcage was all banged up, maybe
there'd be nothing it could do but stay. And he hoped it would, for already the
house felt less lonely.
Sitting
in the chair between the stove and bed, Mose realized how lonely it had been.
It had not been quite so bad until Towser died. He had tried to bring himself
to get another dog, but he never had been able to. For there was no dog that
would take the place of Towser and it had seemed unfaithful to even try. He
could have gotten a cat, of course, but that would remind him too much of
Molly; she had been very fond of cats, and until the time she died, there had
always been two or three of them underfoot around the place.
But
now he was alone. Alone with his farm and his stubbornness and his silver
dollars. The doctor thought, like all the rest of them, that the only silver
Mose had was in the cigar box in the cupboard. There wasn't one of them who
knew about the old iron kettle piled plumb full of them, hidden underneath the
floor boards of the living room. He chuckled at the thought of how he had them
fooled. He'd give a lot to see his neighbors' faces if they could only know.
But he was not the one to tell them. If they were to find it out, they'd have
to find it out themselves.
He
nodded in the chair and finally he slept, sitting upright, with his chin
resting on his chest and his crossed arms wrapped around himself as if to keep
him warm.
When
he woke, in the dark before the dawn, with the lamp flickering on the table and
the fire in the stove burned low, the alien had died.
There
was no doubt of death. The thing was cold and rigid and the husk that was its
body was rough and drying out—as a corn stalk in the field dries out, whipping
in the wind once the growing had been ended.
Mose
pulled the blanket up to cover it, and although this was early to do the
chores, he went out by lantern light and got them done.
After
breakfast, he heated water and washed his face and shaved, and it was the first
time in years he'd shaved any day but Sunday. Then he put on his one good suit
and slicked down his hair and got the old jalopy out of the machine shed and
drove into town.
He
hunted up Eb Dennison, the town clerk, who also was the secretary of the
cemetery association.
"Eb," he said,
"I want to buy a lot."
"But you've got a
lot," protested Eb.
"That
plot," said Mose, "is a family plot. There's just room for me and
Molly."
"Well,
then," asked Eb, "why another one? You have no other members of the
family."
"I
found someone in the woods," said Mose. "I took him home and he died
last night. I plan to bury him."
"If
you found a dead man in the woods," Eb warned him, "you better notify
the coroner and sheriff."
"In
time I may," said Mose, not intending to. "Now how about that
plot?"
Washing
his hands of the affair entirely, Eb sold him the plot
Having
bought his plot, Mose went to the undertaking establishment run by Albert
Jones.
"Al,"
he said, "there's been a death out at the house. A stranger I found out in
the woods. He doesn't seem to have anyone and I aim to take care of it."
"You
got a death certificate?" asked Al, who subscribed to none of the niceties
affected by most funeral parlor operators.
"Well, no, I
haven't."
"Was there a doctor in
attendance?"
"Doc Benson came out
last night."
"He should have made
you out one. I'll give him a ring."
He
phoned Doctor Benson and talked with him a while and got red around the gills.
He finally slammed down the phone and turned on Mose.
"I don't know what you're trying to pull
off," he fumed,
"but Doc tells me this thing of yours
isn't even human. I don't take care of dogs or cats or—" "This ain't
no dog or cat."
"I
don't care what it is. It's got to be human for me to handle it. And don't go
trying to bury it in the cemetery, because it's against the law."
Considerably
discouraged, Mose left the undertaking parlor and trudged slowly up the hill
toward the town's one and only church.
He
found the minister in his study working on a sermon. Mose sat down in a chair
and fumbled his battered hat around and around in his work-scarred hands.
"Parson,"
he said, "I'll tell you the story from first to last," and he did. He
added, "I don't know what it is. I guess no one else does, either. But
it's dead and in need of decent burial and that's the least that I can do. I
can't bury it in the cemetery, so I suppose I'll have to find a place for it on
the farm. I wonder if you could bring yourself to come out and say a word or
two."
The minister gave the
matter some deep consideration.
"I'm
sorry, Mose," he said at last. "I don't believe I can. I am not sure
at all the church would approve of it."
"This
thing may not be human," said Old Mose, "but it is one of God's
critters."
The
minister thought some more, and did some wondering out loud, but made up his
mind finally that he couldn't doit.
So
Mose went down the street to where his car was waiting and drove home, thinking about what heels some humans are.
Back
at the farm again, he got a pick and shovel and went into the garden, and there,
in one corner of it, he dug a grave. He went out to the machine shed to hunt up
some boards to make the thing a casket, but it turned out that he had used the
last of the lumber to patch up the hog pen.
Mose
went to the house and dug around in a chest in one of the back rooms which had
not been used for years, hunting for a sheet to use as a winding shroud, since
there would be no casket. He couldn't find a sheet, but he did unearth an old
white linen table cloth. He figured that would do, so he took it to the
kitchen.
He pulled back the blanket and looked at the
critter lying there in death and a sort of lump came into his throat at the
thought of it—how it had died so lonely and so far from home without a creature
of its own to spend its final hours with. And naked, too, without a stitch of
clothing and with no possession, with not a thing to leave behind as a remembrance
of itself.
He
spread the table cloth out on the floor beside the bed and lifted the thing and
laid it on the table cloth. As he laid it down, he saw the pocket in it—if it
was a pocket—a sort of slitted flap in the center of what could be its chest.
He ran his hand across the pocket area. There was a lump inside it. He
crouched for a long moment beside the body, wondering what to do.
Finally
he reached his fingers into the flap and took out the thing that bulged. It was
a ball, a little bigger than a tennis ball, made of cloudy glass—or, at least,
it looked like glass. He squatted there, staring at it, then took it to the
window for a better look.
There
was nothing strange at all about the ball. It was just a cloudy ball of glass
and it had a rough, dead feel about it, just as the body had.
He
shook his head and took it back and put it where he'd found it and wrapped the
body securely in the cloth. He carried it to the garden and put it in the
grave. Standing solemnly at the head of the grave, he said a few short words
and then shoveled in the dirt.
He
had meant to make a mound above the grave and he had intended to put up a
cross, but at the last he didn't do either one of these. There would be
snoopers. The word would get around and they'd be coming out and hunting for
the spot where he had buried this thing he had found out in the woods. So there
must be no mound to mark the place and no cross as well. Perhaps it was for the
best, he told himself, for what could he have carved or written on the cross?
By
this time it was well past noon and he was getting hungry, but he didn't stop
to eat, because there were other things to do. He went out into the pasture and
caught up Bess and hitched her to the stoneboat and went down into the woods.
He
hitched her to the birdcage that was wrapped around the tree and she pulled it
loose as pretty as you please. Then he loaded it on the stoneboat and hauled it
up the hill and stowed it in the back of the machine shed, in the far corner by
the forge.
After
that, he hitched Bess to the garden plow and gave the garden a cultivating that
it didn't need so it would be fresh dirt all over and no one could locate where
he'd dug the grave.
He
was just finishing the plowing when Sheriff Doyle drove up and got out of the
car. The sheriff was a soft-spoken man, but he was no dawdler. He got right to
the point.
"I hear," he
said, "you found something in the woods."
"That I did,"
said Mose.
"I hear it died on
you."
"Sheriff, you heard
right."
"I'd like to see it,
Mose."
"Can't. I buried it.
And I ain't telling where."
"Mose,"
the sheriff said, "I don't want to make you trouble, but you did an
illegal thing. You can't go finding people in the woods and just bury them when
they up and die on you."
"You talk to Doc
Benson?"
The
sheriff nodded. "He said it wasn't any kind of thing he'd ever seen
before. He said it wasn't human."
"Well,
then," said Mose, "I guess that lets you out. If it wasn't human,
there could be no crime against a person. And if it wasn't owned, there ain't
any crime against property. There's been no one around to claim they owned the
thing, is there?"
The sheriff rubbed his chin. "No, there
hasn't. Maybe you're right. Where did you study law?"
"I
never studied law. I never studied nothing. I just use common sense."
"Doc
said something about the folks up at the university might want to look at
it."
"I
tell you, Sheriff," said Mose. "This thing came here from somewhere
and it died. I don't know where it came from and I don't know what it was and I
don't hanker none to know. To me it was just a living thing that needed help
real bad. It was alive and it had its dignity and in death it commanded some
respect. When the rest of you refused it decent burial, I did the best I could.
And that is all there is to it."
"All
right, Mose," the sheriff said, "if that's how you want it."
He
turned around and stalked back to the car. Mose stood beside old Bess hitched
to her plow and watched him drive away. He drove fast and reckless as if he
might be angry.
Mose
put the plow away and turned the horse back to the pasture and by now it was
time to do chores again.
He
got the chores all finished and made himself some supper and after supper sat
beside the stove, listening to the ticking of the clock, loud in the silent
house, and the crackle of the fire.
All night long the house was lonely.
The
next afternoon, as he was plowing corn, a reporter came and walked up the row
with him and talked with him when he came to the end of the row. Mose didn't
like this reporter much. He was too flip and he asked some funny questions, so
Mose clammed up and didn't tell him much.
A
few days later, a man showed up from the university and showed him the story
the reporter had gone back and written. The story made fun of Mose.
"I'm
sorry," the professor said. "These newspapermen are unaccountable. I
wouldn't worry too much about anything they write."
"I don't," Mose
told him.
The
man from the university asked a lot of questions and made quite a point about
how important it was that he should see the body.
But Mose only shook his head. "It's at
peace," he said. "I aim to leave it that way."
The man went away
disgusted, but still quite dignified.
For
several days there were people driving by and dropping in, the idly curious,
and there were some neighbors Mose hadn't seen for months. But he gave them
all short shrift and in a little while they left him alone and he went on with
his farming and the house stayed lonely.
He
thought again that maybe he should get a dog, but he thought of Towser and he
couldn't do it.
One day, working in the
garden, he found the plant that grew out of the grave. It was a funny-looking
plant and his first impulse was to root it out.
But he didn't do it, for
the plant intrigued him. It was a kind he'd never seen before and he decided he
would let it grow, for a while at least, to see what kind it was. It was a
bulky, fleshy plant, with heavy, dark-green, curling leaves, and it reminded
him in some ways of the skunk cabbage that burgeoned in the woods come spring.
There was another visitor, the queerest of
the lot. He was a dark and intense man who said he was the president of a
flying saucer club. He wanted to know if Mose had talked with the thing he'd
found out in the woods and seemed terribly disappointed when Mose told him he
hadn't. He wanted to know if Mose had found a vehicle the creature might have
traveled in and Mose lied to him about it. He was afraid, the wild way the man
was acting, that he might demand to search the place, and if he had, he'd likely
have found the birdcage hidden in the machine shed back in the corner by the
forge. But the man got to lecturing Mose about withholding vital information.
Finally Mose had taken all he could of it, so
he stepped into the house and picked up the shotgun from behind the door. The
president of the flying saucer club said good-by rather hastily and got out of
there.
Farm life went on as usual, with the corn
laid by and the haying started and out in the garden the strange plant kept on
growing and now was taking shape. Old Mose couldn't believe his eyes when he
saw the sort of shape it took and he spent long evening hours just standing in
the garden, watching it and wondering if his loneliness were playing tricks on
him.
The morning came when he found the plant
standing at the door and waiting for him. He should have been surprised, of
course, but he really wasn't, for he had lived with it, watching it of
eventide, and although he had not dared admit it even to himself, he had known
what it was.
For here was the creature he'd found in the
woods, no longer sick and keening, no longer close to death, but full of life
and youth.
It was not the same entirely, though. He
stood and looked at it and could see the differences—the little differences
that might have been those between youth and age, or between a father and a
son, or again the differences expressed in an evolutionary pattern.
"Good morning," said Mose, not
feeling strange at all to be talking to the thing. "It's good to have you
back."
The thing standing in the yard did not answer
him. But that was not important; he had not expected that it would. The one
important point was that he had something he could talk to.
"I'm going out to do the chores,"
said Mose. "You want to tag along?"
It tagged along with him and it watched him
as he did the chores and he talked to it, which was a vast improvement over
talking to himself.
At breakfast, he laid an extra plate for it
and pulled up an extra chair, but it turned out the critter was not equipped to
use a chair, for it wasn't hinged to sit.
Nor did it eat. That bothered Mose at first,
for he was hospitable, but he told himself that a big, strong, strapping
youngster like this one knew enough to take care of itself, and he probably
didn't need to worry too much about how it got along.
After breakfast, he went out' to the garden,
with the critter accompanying him, and sure enough, the plant was gone. There
was a collapsed husk lying on the ground, the outer covering that had been the
cradle of the creature at his side.
Then he went to the machine
shed and the creature saw the birdcage and rushed over to it and looked it over
minutely. Then it turned around to Mose and made a sort of pleading gesture.
Mose went over to it and laid his hands on
one of the twisted bars and the critter stood beside him and laid its hands on,
too, and they pulled together. It was no use. They could move the metal some,
but not enough to pull it back in shape again.
They stood and looked at one another,
although looking may not be the word, for the critter had no eyes to look with.
It made some funny motions with its hands, but Mose couldn't understand. Then
it lay down on the floor and showed him how the birdcage ribs were fastened to
the base.
It
took a while for Mose to understand how the fastening worked and he never did
know exactly why it did. There wasn't, actually, any reason that it should work
that way.
First
you applied some pressure, just the right amount at the exact and correct angle,
and the bar would move a little. Then you applied some more pressure, again the
exact amount and at the proper angle, and the bar would move some more. You did
this three times and the bar came loose, although there was, God knows, no
reason why it should.
Mose
started a fire
in the forge and shoveled
in some coal and worked the bellows while the critter watched. But when he
picked up the bar to put it in the fire, the critter got between him and the
forge and wouldn't let him near. Mose realized then he couldn't—or wasn't
supposed to— heat the bar to straighten it and he never questioned the entire Tightness of it. For, he told himself, this thing must
surely know the proper way to do it.
So
he took the bar over to the anvil and started hammering it back into shape
again, cold, without the use of fire, while the critter tried to show him the
shape it should be. It took quite a while, but finally it was straightened out
to the critter's satisfaction.
Mose
figured they'd have themselves a time getting the bar back in place again, but
it slipped on as slick as could be.
Then
they took off another bar and this one went faster, now that Mose had the hang
of it.
But
it was hard and grueling labor. They worked all day and only straightened out
five bars.
It
took four solid days to get the bars on the birdcage hammered into shape and
all the time the hay was waiting to be cut.
But
it was all right with Mose. He had someone to talk to and the house had lost
its loneliness.
When
they got the bars back in place, the critter slipped into the cage and starting
fooling with a dingus on the roof of it that looked like a complicated basket.
Mose, watching, figured that the basket was some sort of control.
The
critter was discouraged. It walked around the shed looking for something and
seemed unable to find it. It came back to Mose and made its despairing,
pleading gesture. Mose showed it iron and steel; he dug into a carton where he
kept bolts and clamps and bushings and scraps of metal and other odds and ends,
finding brass and copper and even some aluminum, but it wasn't any of these.
And
Mose was glad—a bit ashamed for feeling glad, but glad all the same.
For
it had been clear to him that when the birdcage was all ready, the critter
would be leaving him. It had been impossible for Mose to stand in the way of
the repair of the cage, or to refuse to help. But now that it apparently
couldn't be, he found himself well pleased.
Now
the critter would have to stay with him and he'd have someone to talk to and
the house would not be lonely. It would be welcome, he told himself, to have
folks again. The critter was almost as good a companion as Towser.
Next
morning, while Mose was fixing breakfast, he reached up in the cupboard to get
the box of oatmeal and his hand struck the cigar box and it came crashing to
the floor. It fell over on its side and the lid came open and the dollars went
free-wheeling all around the kitchen.
Out
of the corner of his eye, Mose saw the critter leaping quickly in pursuit of
one of them. It snatched it up and turned to Mose, with the coin held between
its fingers, and a sort of thrumming noise was coming out of the nest of worms
on top of it.
It
bent and scooped up more of them and cuddled them and danced a sort of jig, and
Mose knew, with a sinking heart, that it had been silver the critter had been
hunting.
So
Mose got down on his hands and knees
and helped the critter gather up all the dollars. They put them back into the
cigar box and Mose picked up the box and gave it to the critter.
The
critter took it and hefted it and had a disappointed look. Taking the box over
to the table, it took the dollars out and stacked them in neat piles and Mose
could see it was very disappointed.
Perhaps,
after all, Mose thought, it had not been silver the thing had been hunting for.
Maybe it had made a mistake in thinking that the silver was some other kind of
metal.
Mose
got down the oatmeal and poured it into some water and put it on the stove.
When it was cooked and the coffee was ready, he carried his breakfast to the
table and sat down to eat.
The critter still was standing across the
table from him, stacking and restacking the piles of silver dollars. And now it
showed him with a hand held above the stacks, that it needed more of them. This
many stacks, it showed him, and each stack so high.
Mose sat stricken, with a spoon full of
oatmeal halfway to his mouth. He thought of all those other dollars, the iron
kettle packed with them, underneath the floor boards in the living room. And he
couldn't do it; they were the only thing he had—except the critter now. And he
could not give them up so the critter could go and leave him too.
He ate his bowl of oatmeal without tasting it
and drank two cups of coffee. And all the time the critter stood there and
showed him how much more it needed.
"I can't do it for you," Old Mose
said. "I've done all you can expect of any living being. I found you in
the woods and I gave you warmth and shelter. I tried to help you, and when I
couldn't, at least I gave you a place to die in. I buried you and protected you
from all those other people and I did not pull you up when you started growing
once again. Surely you can't expect me to keep on giving endlessly."
But it was no good. The
critter could not hear him and he did not convince himself.
He got up from the table
and walked into the living room with the critter trailing him. He loosened the
floor boards and took out the kettle, and the critter, when it saw what was in
the kettle, put its arms around itself and hugged in happiness.
They lugged the money out to the machine shed
and Mose built a fire in the forge and put the kettle in the fire and started
melting down that hard-saved money.
There were times he thought he couldn't
finish the job, but he did.
The critter got the basket out of the
birdcage and put it down beside the forge and dipped out the molten silver with
an iron ladle and poured it here and there into the basket, shaping it in place
with careful hammer taps.
It took a long time, for it was exacting
work, but finally it was done and the silver almost gone. The critter lugged
the basket back into the birdcage and fastened it in place.
It was almost evening now and Mose had to go
and do the chores. He half expected the thing might haul out the birdcage and
be gone when he came back to the house. And he tried to be sore at it for its
selfishness—it had taken from him and had not tried to pay him back—it had not,
so far as he could tell, even tried to thank him. But he made a poor job of
being sore at it.
It was waiting for him when he came from the
barn carrying two pails full of milk. It followed him inside the house and
stood around and he tried to talk to it. But he didn't have the heart to do
much talking. He could not forget that it would be leaving, and the pleasure
of its present company was lost in his terror of the loneliness to come.
For now he didn't even have his money to help
ward off the loneliness.
As he lay in bed that night, strange thoughts
came creeping in upon him—the thought of an even greater loneliness than he
had ever known upon this runty farm, the terrible, devastating loneliness of
the empty wastes that lay between the stars, a driven loneliness while one
hunted for a place or person that remained a misty thought one could not define,
but which it was most important one should find.
It was a strange thing for him to be
thinking, and quite suddenly he knew it was no thought of his, but of this
other that was in the room with him.
He tried to raise himself,
he fought to raise himself, but he couldn't do it. He held his head up a
moment, then fell back upon the pillow and went sound asleep.
Next morning, after Mose had eaten breakfast,
the two of them went to the machine shed and dragged the birdcage out. It
stood there, a weird alien thing, in the chill brightness of the dawn.
The critter walked up to it and started to
slide between two of the bars, but when it was halfway through, it stepped out
again and moved over to confront Old Mose.
"Good-by, friend," said Mose. "I'll miss you."
There was a strange stinging in his eyes.
The other held out its hand in farewell, and
Mose took it and there was something in the hand he grasped, something round
and smooth that was transferred from its hand to his.
The thing took its hand away and stepped
quickly to the birdcage and slid between the bars. The hands reached for the
basket and there was a sudden flicker and the birdcage was no longer there.
Mose
stood lonely in the barnyard, looking at the place where there was no birdcage
and remembering what he had felt or thought—or been told?—the night before as
he lay in bed.
Already
the critter would be there, out between the stars, in that black and utter
loneliness, hunting for a place or thing or person that no human mind could
grasp.
Slowly
Mose turned around to go back to the house, to get the pails and go down to the
barn to get the milking done.
He
remembered the object in his hand and lifted his still-clenched fist in front
of him. He opened his fingers and the little crystal ball lay there in his
palm—and it was exactly like the one he'd found in the slitted flap in the body
he had buried in the garden. Except that one had been dead and cloudy and this
one had the living glow of a distant-burning fire.
Looking
at it, he had the strange feeling of a happiness and comfort such as he had
seldom known before, as if there were many people with him and all of them were
friends.
He closed his hand upon it and the happiness
stayed on —and it was all wrong, for there was not a single reason that he
should be happy. The critter finally had left him and his money was all gone
and he had no friends, but still he kept on feeling good.
He
put the ball into his pocket and stepped spryly for the house to get the
milking pails. He pursed up his whiskered lips and began to whistle and it had
been a long, long time since he had even thought to whistle.
Maybe
he was happy, he told himself, because the critter had not left without
stopping to take his hand and try to say good-by.
And
a gift, no matter how worthless it might be, how cheap a trinket, still had a
basic value in simple sentiment. It had been many years since anyone had
bothered to give him a gift.
It was dark and lonely and unending in the
depths of space with no Companion. It might be long before another was
obtainable.
It perhaps was a foolish thing to do, but the
old creature had been such a kind savage, so fumbling and so pitiful and eager
to help. And one who travels far and fast must likewise travel light. There had
been nothing else to give.
SPACE-TIME FOR
SPRINGERS
Fritz Leiber
Fritz
leiber is the author of
seven novels and five short-story collections; since the appearance of his
first story in 1939, he has published close to 200 magazine stories, almost all
science fiction and fantasy, and a large number of critical and scholarly
articles on the combined fields. His work has appeared in more than fifty
anthologies, a number of stories have been dramatized for television, and his
memorable novel. Conjure
Wife, was made into a movie
under the title Burn,
Witch, Burn.
Born in Chicago in 1910, leiber spent his
first years touring with his actor-parents in Robert B. Manlell's Shakespeare
Company. Later, he lived with two maiden aunts in Chicago during the school
year and spent summers at his parents' off-season home on the Jersey shore.. He
began writing while at the University of Chicago (Philosophy, Phi Beta Kappa),
creating with Harry Fischer the background of the first "Grey Mouser"
stories.
He
spent a year studying for the Episcopal ministry, two years acting in his
father's Shakespeare Company, and two years in the movies, during which lime he
initiated a close correspondence with H. P. Lovecraff, a major influence on his
early work. Other jobs included a year of teaching at Occidental College, and
editorial work on an encyclopedia and at Science Digest. Since 1957 he has devoted his full time to
writing.
His
first book was a collection. Night's Black Agents (Arkham House, 1947), followed shortly by the novel. Gather Darkness. He has received two "Hugo" awards;
for The Big Time (1958) and The Wanderer (1964).
Most recent titles: The Night of the Wolf (Ballanline,
1966), and a "novelization," Tarzan and the Valley of Gold.
He
is currently working on a book on the fantasy novel for the University of
Southern Illinois Press and completing a novel version of some of the
"Mouser" stories. A new short-story collection will be published
shortly by Rupert Hart-Davis in England.
Seven Leiber stories have appeared in Ihe SF Annuals: "The Beat
Cluster," in the 7th Annual, also
appeared in the short-story collection, A Pail of
Air. "The Man Who
Made Friends with Electricity" was in the 8th Annual; "237 Talking
Statues, Etc." in the 9th; "Be of Good Cheer" the 10th; "Moon
Duel", the 11th. "Mariana", from the 5th Annual, is also
included in this volume. "Space-Time for Springers" was first
published in Star Science Fiction #4
(Ballantine, 1958), and reprinted in Star of Stars (1960); and in the 4th SF
Annual.
BBII
Gummitch was a
superkitten, as he knew very well, with an I.Q. of about
160. Of course, he didn't talk. But everybody knows that I.Q. tests based on
language ability are very one-sided. Besides, he would talk as soon as they
started setting a place for him at table and pouring him coffee. Ashurbanipal
and Cleopatra ate horsemeat from pans on the floor and they didn't talk. Baby
dined in his crib on milk from a bottle and he didn't talk. Sissy sat at table
but they didn't pour her coffee and she didn't talk—not one word. Father and
Mother (whom Gummitch had nicknamed Old Horsemeat and Kitty-Come-Here) sat at
table and poured each other coffee and they did talk. Q.E.D.
Meanwhile, he would get by
very well on thought projection and intuitive understanding of all human
speech—not even to mention cat patois, which almost any civilized animal could
play by ear. The dramatic monologues and So-cratic dialogues, the quiz and
panel-show appearances, the felidological expedition to darkest Africa (where
he would uncover the real truth behind lions and tigers), the exploration of
the outer planets—all these could wait. The same went for the books for which
he was ceaselessly accumulating material: The Encylopedia of Odors, Anthropofeline
Psychology, Invisible Signs and Secret Wonders, Space-Time for Springers, Slit
Eyes Look at Life, et
cetera. For the present it was enough to live existence to the hilt and soak up
knowledge, missing no experience proper to his age level—to rush about with
tail aflame.
So to all outward appearances Gummitch was
just a vividly normal kitten, as shown by the succession of nicknames he bore
along the magic path that led from blue-eyed infancy toward puberty: Little One,
Squawker, Portly, Bumble (for purring not clumsiness), Old Starved-to-Death,
Fierso, Loverboy (affection not sex), Spook and Catnik. Of these only the last
perhaps requires further explanation: the Russians had just sent Muttnik up
after Sputnik, so that when one evening Gummitch streaked three times across
the firmament of the living room floor in the same direction, past the fixed
stars of the humans and the comparatively slow-moving heavenly bodies of the
two older cats, and Kitty-Come-Here quoted the line from Keats:
Then felt I like some watcher of the skies When a new planet swims into his ken;
it
was inevitable that Old Horsemeat would say, "Ah—Catnik!"
The new name lasted all of three days, to be
replaced by Gummitch, which showed signs of becoming permanent.
The little cat was on the verge of truly
growing up, at least so Gummitch overheard Old Horsemeat comment to
Kitty-Come-Here. A few short weeks, Old Horsemeat said, and Gummitch's fiery
flesh would harden, his slim neck thicken, the electricity vanish from
everything but his fur, and all his delightful kittenish qualities rapidly give
way to the earth-bound singlemindedness of a torn. They'd be lucky, Old
Horsemeat concluded, if he didn't turn completely surly like Ashurbanipal.
Gummitch listened to these predictions with
gay unconcern and with secret amusement from his vantage point of superior
knowledge, in the same spirit that he accepted so many phases of his outwardly
conventional existence: the murderous sidelong looks he got from Ashurbanipal
and Cleopatra as he devoured his own horsemeat from his own little tin pan,
because they sometimes were given canned catfood but he never; the stark idiocy
of Baby, who didn't know the difference between a live cat and a stuffed teddy bear
and who tried to cover up his ignorance by making goo-goo noises and poking
indiscriminately at all eyes; the far more serious—because cleverly hidden—
maliciousness of Sissy, who had to be watched out for warily—especially when you were alone—and
whose retarded—even warped—development, Gummitch knew, was Old Horsemeat and
Kitty-Come-Here's deepest, most secret, worry (more of Sissy and her evil ways
soon); the limited intellect of Kitty-Come-Here, who despite the amounts of
coffee she drank was quite as featherbrained as kittens are supposed to be and
who firmly believed, for example, that kittens operated in the same space-time
as other beings— that to get from here to there they had to cross the space between-—and
similar fallacies; the mental stodginess of even Old Horsemeat, who although he
understood quite a bit of the secret doctrine and talked intelligently to Gummitch
when they were alone, nevertheless suffered from the limitations of his
status—a rather nice old god but a maddeningly slow-witted one.
But
Gummitch could easily forgive all this massed inadequacy and downright
brutishness in his felino-human household, because he was aware that he alone
knew the real truth about himself and about other kittens and babies as well,
the truth which was hidden from weaker minds, the truth that was as
intrinsically incredible as the germ theory of disease or the origin of the
whole great universe in the explosion of a single atom.
As a
baby kitten Gummitch had believed that Old Horse-meat's two hands were hairless
kittens permanently attached to the ends of Old Horsemeat's arms but having an
independent life of their own. How he had hated and loved those two
five-legged sallow monsters, his first playmates, comforters and
battle-opponents!
Well,
even that fantastic discarded notion was but a trifling fancy compared to the
real truth about himself!
The
forehead of Zeus split open to give birth to Minerva. Gummitch had been born
from the waist-fold of a dirty old terrycloth bathrobe, Old Horsemeat's basic
garment. The kitten was intuitively certain of it and had proved it to himself
as well as any Descartes or Aristotle. In a kitten-size tuck of that ancient
bathrobe the atoms of his body had gathered and quickened into life. His
earliest memories were of snoozing wrapped in terrycloth, warmed by Old
Horsemeat's heat. Old Horsemeat and Kitty-Come-Here were his true parents. The
other theory of his origin, the one he heard Old Horsemeat and Kitty-Come-Here
recount from time to time—that he had been the only surviving kitten of a
litter abandoned next door, that he had had the shakes from vitamin deficiency
and lost the tip of his tail and the hair on his paws and had to be nursed back
to life and health with warm yellowish milk-and-vitamins fed from an eyedropper—that
other theory was just one of those rationalizations with which mysterious
nature cloaks the birth of heroes, perhaps wisely veiling the truth from minds
unable to bear it, a rationalization as false as Kitty-Come-Here and Old
Horsemeat's touching belief that Sissy and Baby were their children rather than
the cubs of Ashurbanipal and Cleopatra.
The day that Gummitch had discovered by pure
intuition the secret of his birth he had been filled with a wild instant
excitement. He had only kept it from tearing him to pieces by rushing out to
the kitchen and striking and devouring a fried scallop, torturing it fiendishly
first for twenty minutes.
And
the secret of his birth was only the beginning. His intellectual faculties
aroused, Gummitch had two days later intuited a further and greater secret:
since he was the child^ of humans he would, upon reaching this maturation date
of which Old Horsemeat had spoken, turn not into a sullen torn but into a
godlike human youth with reddish golden hair the color of his present fur. He
would be poured coffee; and he would instantly be able to talk, probably in
all languages. While Sissy (how clear it was now!) would at approximately the
same time shrink and fur out into a sharp-clawed and vicious she-cat dark as her
hair, sex and self-love her only concerns, fit harem-mate for Cleopatra,
concubine to Ashurbanipal.
Exactly
the same was true, Gummitch realized at once, for all kittens and babies, all
humans and cats, wherever they might dwell. Metamorphosis was as much a part of
the fabric of their lives as it was of the insects'. It was also the basic fact
underlying all legends of werewolves, vampires and witches' familiars.
If
you just rid your mind of preconceived notions, Gummitch told himself, it was
all very logical. Babies were stupid, fumbling, vindictive creatures without
reason or speech. What more natural than that they should grow up into mute
sullen selfish beasts bent only on rapine and reproduction? While kittens were
quick, sensitive, subtle, supremely alive. What other destiny were they
possibly fitted for except to become the deft, word-speaking, book-writing,
music-making, meat-getting-and-dispensing masters of the world? To dwell on the
physical differences, to point out that kittens and men, babies and cats, are
rather unlike in appearance and size, would be to miss the forest for the
trees—very much as if an entomologist should proclaim metamorphosis a myth
because his microscope failed to discover the wings of a butterfly in a
caterpillar's slime or a golden beetle in a grub.
Nevertheless
it was such a mind-staggering truth, Gum-mitch realized at the same time, that
it was easy to understand why humans, cats, babies and perhaps most kittens
were quite unaware of it. How safely explain to a butterfly that he was once a
hairy crawler, or to a dull larva that he will one day be a walking jewel? No,
in such situations the delicate minds of man- and feline-kind are guarded by a
merciful mass amnesia, such as Velikovsky has explained prevents us from
recalling that in historical times the Earth was catastrophically bumped by the
planet Venus operating in the manner of a comet before settling down (with a
cosmic sigh of relief, surely!) into its present orbit.
This
conclusion was confirmed when Gummitch in the first fever of illumination tried
to communicate his great insight to others. He told it in cat patois, as well
as that limited jargon permitted, to Ashurbanipal and Cleopatra and even, on
the off chance, to Sissy and Baby. They showed no interest whatever, except
that Sissy took advantage of his unguarded preoccupation to stab him with a
fork.
Later, alone with Old Horsemeat, he projected
the great new thoughts, staring with solemn yellow eyes at the old god, but the
latter grew markedly nervous and even showed signs of real fear, so Gummitch
desisted. ("You'd have sworn he was trying to put across something as deep
as the Einstein theory or the doctrine of original sin," Old Horse-meat
later told Kitty-Come-Here.)
But
Gummitch was a man now in all but form, the kitten reminded himself after these
failures, and it was part of his destiny to shoulder secrets alone when
necessary. He wondered if the general amnesia would affect him when he
metamorphosed. There was no sure answer to this question, but he hoped not—and
sometimes felt that there was reason for his hopes. Perhaps he would be the
first true kitten-man, speaking from a wisdom that had no locked doors in it.
Once he was tempted to speed up the process
by the use of drugs. Left alone in the kitchen, he sprang onto the table and
started to lap up the black puddle in the bottom of Old Horsemeat's coffee cup.
It tasted foul and poisonous and he withdrew with a little snarl, frightened as
well as revolted. The dark beverage would not work its tongue-loosening magic,
he realized, except at the proper time and with the proper ceremonies.
Incantations might be necessary as well. Certainly unlawful tasting was highly
dangerous.
The
futility of expecting coffee to work any wonders by itself was further
demonstrated to Gummitch when Kitty-Come-Here, wordlessly badgered by Sissy,
gave a few spoonfuls to the little girl, liberally lacing it first with milk
and sugar. Of course Gummitch knew by now that Sissy was destined shortly to
turn into a cat and that no amount of coffee would ever make her talk, but it
was nevertheless instructive to see how she spat out the first mouthful,
drooling a lot of saliva after it, and dashed the cup and its contents at the
chest of Kitty-Come-Here.
Gummitch
continued to feel a great deal of sympathy for his parents in their worries
about Sissy and he longed for the day when he would metamorphose and be able as
an acknowledged man-child truly to console them. It was heartbreaking to see
how they each tried to coax the little girl to talk, always attempting it while
the other was absent, how they seized on each accidentally wordlike note in the
few sounds she uttered and repeated it back to her hopefully, how they were
more and more possessed by fears not so much of her retarded (they thought)
development as of her increasingly obvious maliciousness, which was directed
chiefly at Baby . . . though the two cats and Gummitch bore their share. Once
she had caught Baby alone in his crib and used the sharp corner of a block to
dot Baby's large-domed, lightly downed head with triangular red marks.
Kitty-Come-Here had discovered her doing it, but the woman's first action had
been to rub Baby's head to obliterate the marks so that Old Horsemeat wouldn't
see them. That was the night Kitty-Come-Here hid the abnormal psychology
books.
Gummitch
understood very well that Kitty-Come-Here and Old Horsemeat, honestly believing
themselves to be Sissy's parents, felt just as deeply about her as if they actually
were and he did what little he could under the present circumstances to help
them. He had recently come to feel a quite independent affection for Baby—the
miserable little proto-cat was so completely stupid and defenseless—and so he
unofficially constituted himself the creature's guardian, taking his naps
behind the door of the nursery and dashing about noisily whenever Sissy showed
up. In any case he realized that as a potentially adult member of a
felino-human household he had his natural responsibilities.
Accepting
responsibilities was as much a part of a kitten's life, Gummitch told himself,
as shouldering unsharable intuitions and secrets, the number of which
continued to grow from day to day.
There
was, for instance, the Affair of the Squirrel Mirror.
Gummitch had early solved
the mystery of ordinary mirrors and of the creatures that appeared in them. A
little observation and sniffing and one attempt to get behind the heavy
wall-job in the living room had convinced him that mirror beings were
insubstantial or at least hermetically sealed into their other world, probably
creatures of pure spirit, harmless imitative ghosts—including the silent Gummitch
Double who touched paws with him so softly yet so coldly.
Just the same, Gummitch had let his
imagination play with what would happen if one day, while looking into the
mirror world, he should let loose his grip on his spirit and let it slip into
the Gummitch Double while the other's spirit slipped into his body—if, in
short, he should change places with the scentless ghost kitten. Being doomed to
a life consisting wholly of imitation and completely lacking in opportunities
to show initiative—except for the behind-the-scenes judgment and speed needed
in rushing from one mirror to another to keep up with the real Gummitch
—would be sickeningly dull, Gummitch decided,
and he resolved to keep a tight hold on his spirit at all times in the vicinity
of mirrors.
But
that isn't telling about the Squirrel Mirror. One morning Gummitch was peering
out the front bedroom window that overlooked the roof of the porch. Gummitch
had already classified windows as semi-mirrors having two kinds of space on the
other side: the mirror world and that harsh region filled with mysterious and
dangerously organized-sounding noises called the outer world, into which
grownup humans reluctantly-ventured at intervals, donning special garments for
the purpose and shouting loud farewells that were meant to be reassuring but
achieved just the opposite effect. The coexistence of two kinds of space
presented no paradox to the kitten who carried in his mind the 27-chapter
outline of Space-Time
for Springers—indeed,
it constituted one of the minor themes of the book.
This
morning the bedroom was dark and the outer world was dull and sunless, so the
mirror world was unusually difficult to see. Gummitch was just lifting his face
toward it, nose twitching, his front paws on the sill, when what should rear up
on the other side, exactly in the space that the, Gummitch Double normally
occupied, but a dirty brown, narrow-visaged image with savagely low forehead,
dark evil wall-eyes, and a huge jaw filled with shovel-like teeth.
Gummitch was enormously startled and
hideously frightened. He felt his grip on his spirit go limp, and without
volition he teleported himself three yards to the rear, making use of that
faculty for cutting corners in space-time, traveling by space-warp in fact,
which was one of his powers that Kitty-Come-Here refused to believe in and that
even Old Horsemeat accepted only on faith.
Then,
not losing a moment, he picked himself up by his furry seat, swung himself
around, dashed downstairs at top speed, sprang to the top of the sofa, and
stared for several seconds at the Gummitch Double in the wall-mirror—not
relaxing a muscle strand until he was completely convinced that he was still
himself and had not been transformed into the nasty brown apparition that had
confronted him in the bedroom window.
"Now what do you suppose brought that
on?" Old Horse-meat
asked Kitty-Come-Here.
Later
Gummitch learned that what he had seen had been a squirrel, a savage,
nut-hunting being belonging wholly to the outer world (except for forays into
attics) and not at all to the mirror one. Nevertheless he kept a vivid memory
of his profound momentary conviction that the squirrel had taken the Gummitch
Double's place and been about to take his own. He shuddered to think what would
have happened if the squirrel had been actively interested in trading spirits
with him. Apparently mirrors and mirror-situations, just as he had always
feared, were highly conducive to spirit transfers. He filed the information
away in the memory cabinet reserved for dangerous, exciting and possibly useful
information, such as plans for climbing straight up glass (diamond-tipped
claws!) and flying higher than the trees.
These days his thought cabinets were
beginning to feel filled to bursting and he could hardly wait for the moment
when the true rich taste of coffee, lawfully drunk, would permit him to speak.
He
pictured the scene in detail: the family gathered in conclave at the kitchen
table, Ashurbanipal and Cleopatra respectfully watching from floor level,
himself sitting erect on chair with paws (or would they be hands?) lightly
touching his cup of thin china, while Old Horsemeat poured the thin black
steaming stream. He knew the Great Transformation must be close at hand.
At
the same time he knew that the other critical situation in the household was
worsening swiftly. Sissy, he realized now, was far older than Baby and should
long ago have undergone her own somewhat less glamorous though equally
necessary transformation (the first tin of raw horsemeat could hardly be as
exciting as the first cup of coffee). Her time was long overdue. Gummitch found
increasing horror in this mute vampirish being inhabiting the body
of a rapidly growing girl, though inwardly equipped to be nothing but a most blocKlthirsty she-cat. How dreadful to think of Old
Horsemeat and Kitty-Come-Here having to care all their lives for such a
monster! Gummitch told himself that if any opportunity for alleviating his
parents' misery should ever present itself to him, he would not hesitate for
an instant.
Then one night, when the sense of Change was
so burst-ingly strong in him that he knew tomorrow must be the Day, but when
the house was also exceptionally unquiet with boards creaking and snapping,
taps adrip, and curtains mysteriously rustling at closed windows (so that it
was clear that the many spirit worlds including the mirror one must be pressing
very close), the opportunity came to Gummitch.
Kitty-Come-Here
and Old Horsemeat had fallen into especially sound, drugged sleeps, the former
with a bad cold, the latter with one unhappy highball too many (Gummitch knew
he had been brooding about Sissy). Baby slept too, though with uneasy
whimperings and joggings— moonlight shone full on his crib past a window shade
which had whirringly rolled itself up without human or feline agency. Gummitch
kept vigil under the crib, with eyes closed but with widely excited mind
pressing outward to every boundary of the house and even stretching here and
there into the outer world. On this night of all nights sleep was unthinkable.
Then
suddenly he became aware of footsteps, footsteps so soft they must, he thought,
be Cleopatra's.
No,
softer than that, so soft they might be those of the Gummitch Double escaped
from the mirror world at last and padding up toward him through the darkened
halls. A ribbon of fur rose along his spine.
Then
into the nursery Sissy came prowling. She looked slim as an Egyptian princess
in her long, thin, yellow nightgown and as sure of herself, but the cat was
very strong in her tonight, from the flat intent eyes to the dainty canine
teeth slightly bared—one look at her now would have sent Kitty-Come-Here
running for the telephone number she kept hidden, the telephone number of the
special doctor— and Gummitch realized he was witnessing a monstrous suspension
of natural law in that this being should be able to exist for a moment without
growing fur and changing round pupils for slit eyes.
He
retreated to the darkest corner of the room, suppressing a snarl.
Sissy approached the crib and leaned over
Baby in the moonlight, keeping her shadow off him. For a while she gloated.
Then she began softly to scratch his cheek with a long hatpin she carried,
keeping away from his eye, but just barely. Baby awoke and saw her and Baby
didn't cry. Sissy continued to scratch, always a little more deeply. The moonlight
glittered on the jeweled end of the pin.
Gummitch
knew he faced a horror that could not be countered by running about or even
spitting and screeching. Only magic could fight so obviously supernatural a
manifestation. And this was also no time to think of consequences, no matter
how clearly and bitterly etched they might appear to a mind intensely awake.
He
sprang up onto the other side of the crib, not uttering a sound, and fixed his
golden eyes on Sissy's in the moonlight. Then he moved forward straight at her
evil face, stepping slowly, not swiftly, using his extraordinary knowledge of
the properties of space to
walk straight through her hand and arm as they flailed the hatpin at him. When his nose-tip finally paused a fraction
of an inch from hers, his eyes had not blinked once, and she could not look
away. Then he unhesitatingly flung his spirit into her like a fistful of
flaming arrows and he worked the Mirror Magic.
Sissy's
moonlit face, feline and terrified, was in a sense the last thing that
Gummitch, the real Gummitch-kitten, ever saw in this world. For the next
instant he felt himself enfolded by the foul, black blinding cloud of Sissy's
spirit, which his own had displaced. At the same time he heard the little girl
scream, very loudly but even more distinctly, "Mommy!"
That cry might have brought
Kitty-Come-Here out of her grave, let alone from sleep merely deep or drugged.
Within seconds she was in the nursery, closely followed by Old Horsemeat, and
she had caught up Sissy in her arms and the little girl was articulating the
wonderful word again and again, and miraculously following it with the command—
there could be no doubt, Old Horsemeat heard it too— "Hold me tight!"
Then Baby finally dared to cry. The scratches
on his cheek came to attention and Gummitch, as he had known must happen, was
banished to the basement amid cries of horror and loathing, chiefly from
Kitty-Come-Here.
The little cat did not mind. No basement
would be one-tenth as dark as Sissy's spirit that now enshrouded him for
always, hiding all the file drawers and the labels on all the folders, blotting
out forever even the imagining of the scene of first coffee-drinking and first
speech.
In a
last intuition, before the animal blackness closed in utterly, Gummitch
realized that the spirit, alas, is not the same thing as the consciousness and
that one may lose— sacrifice—the first and still be burdened with the second.
Old
Horsemeat had seen the hatpin (and hid it quickly from Kitty-Come-Here) and so
he knew that the situation was not what it seemed and that Gummitch was at the
very least being made into a sort of scapegoat. He was quite apologetic when
he brought the tin pans of food to the basement during the period of the little
cat's exile. It was a comfort to Gummitch, albeit a small one. Gummitch told
himself, in his new black halting manner of thinking, that after all a cat's best friend is his man.
From
that night Sissy never turned back in her development. Within two months she
had made three years' progress in speaking. She became an outstandingly
bright, light-footed, high-spirited little girl. Although she never told anyone
this, the moonlit nursery and Gummitch's magnified face were her first
memories. Everything before that was inky blackness. She was always very nice
to Gummitch in a careful sort of way. She could never stand to play the game
"Owl Eyes."
After
a few weeks Kitty-Come-Here forgot her fears and Gummitch once again had the
run of the house. But by then the transformation Old Horsemeat had always
warned about had fully taken place. Gummitch was a kitten no longer but an
almost burly torn. In him it took the psychological form not of sullenness or
surliness but an extreme dignity. He seemed at times rather like an old pirate
brooding on treasures he would never live to dig up, shores of adventure he
would never reach. And sometimes when you looked into his yellow eyes you felt
that he had in him all the materials for the book Slit Eyes Look at Life—three or four volumes at least—although he
would never write it. And that was natural when you come to think of it, for as
Gummitch knew very well, bitterly well indeed, his fate was to be the only
kitten in the world that did not grow up to be a man.
PELT
Carol Emshwiller
Carol Emshwiller is
more typical of the writers who came into science fiction in the sixties than
of most of the others in this volume. Graduated from the University of Michigan
in 1949, she went to France on a Fulbrighl to study art; when she switched to
writing, she began with science fiction, published some fifteen stories between
1956—1961. Her work was distinctive from the beginning; by 1961, she was
considerably "far-out" for the then-standards of the science-fiction
magazines, and turned her sights to the literary and avant-garde markets. Her work has appeared recently in Transatlantic Review, Cavalier, and the one-shot City Sampler. She
is married to Ed Emshwiller, the science-fiction illustrator and producer of
experimental films {Relativity, Life Lines, Thanatopsis, etc.); they live with their three children in
Wantagh, Long Island.
"Pelt",
originally published in Fantasy & Science Fiction, November,
1958, was reprinted in the 4th SF Annual.
"Day at the Beach", from the 5th Annual,
also appears in this anthology.
■
■■■
She was a
white dog with
a wide face and eager eyes, and this was the planet, Jaxa, in winter.
She
trotted well ahead of the master, sometimes nose to ground, sometimes sniffing
the air, and she didn't care if they were being watched or not. She knew that
strange things skulked behind iced trees, but strangeness was her job. She had
been trained for it, and crisp, glittering Jaxa was, she felt, exactly what she
had been trained for, born for.
I love it, I love it.. . that was in her
pointing ears, her waving tail... I love this place. It was a world of ice, a world with the sound of breaking
goblets. Each time the wind blew they came
shattering down by the trayful, and each time one branch brushed against
another, it was: Skoal, Down the hatch, To the Queen . . . tink, tink, tink.
And the sun was reflected as if from a million cut-glass punch bowls under a
million crystal chandeliers.
She
wore four little black boots, and each step she took sounded like two or three
more goblets gone, but the sound was lost in the other tinkling, snapping,
cracklings of the silver, frozen forest about her.
She
had figured out at last what that hovering scent was. It had been there from
the beginning, the landing two days ago, mingling with Jaxa's bitter air and
seeming to be just a part of the smell of the place, she found it in
crisscrossing trails about the squatting ship, and hanging, heavy and recent,
in hollows behind flat-branched, piney-smelling bushes. She thought of honey
and fat men and dry fur when she smelled it.
There
was something big out there, and more than one of them, more than two. She
wasn't sure how many. She had a feeling this was something to tell the master,
but what was the signal, the agreed upon noise for: We are being watched? There
was a whisper of sound, short and quick, for: Sighted close, come and shoot.
And there was a noise for danger (all these through her throat mike to the
receiver at the master's ear), a special, howly bark: Awful, awful— there is
something awful going to happen. There was even a noise, a low, rumble of sound
for: Wonderful, wonderful fur—drop everything and come after this one. (And she knew a good fur when she saw one. She had been trained to
know.) But there was no sign for: We are being watched.
She'd whined and barked when she was sure
about it, but that had got her a pat on the head and a rumpling of the neck
fur. "You're doing fine, Baby. This world is our oyster, all ours. All we
got to do is pick up the pearls. Jaxa's what we've been waiting for." And
Jaxa was, so she did her work and didn't try to tell him any more, for what was
one more strange thing in one more strange world?
She was on the trail of something now, and
the master was behind her, out of sight. He'd better hurry. He'd better hurry
or there'll be waiting to do, watching the thing, whatever it is, steady on
until he comes, holding tight back, and that will be hard. Hurry, hurry.
She
could hear the whispered whistle of a tune through the receiver at her ear and
she knew he was not hurrying but just being happy. She ran on, eager, curious.
She did not give the signal for hurry, but she made a hurry sound of her own,
and she heard him stop whistling and whisper back into the mike, "So, so,
Queen of Venus. The furs are waiting to be picked. No hurry, Baby." But
morning was to her for hurry. There was time later to be tired and slow.
That
fat-man honeyish smell was about, closer and strong. Her curiosity became two
pronged—this smell or that? What is the
big thing that watches? She kept to the trail she was on, though. Better to be
sure, and this thing was not so elusive, not twisting and doubling back, but up
ahead and going where it was going.
She
topped a rise and half slid, on thick furred rump, down the other side,
splattering ice. She snuffled at the bottom to be sure of the smell again, and
then, nose to ground, trotted past a thick and tangled hedgerow.
She
was thinking through her nose now. The world was all smell, crisp air and sour
ice and turpentine pine . .. and this
animal, a urine and brown grass thing . . . and then, strong in front of her,
honey-furry-fat man.
She
felt it looming before she raised her head to look, and there it was, the smell
in person, some taller than the master and twice as wide. Counting his doubled
suit and all, twice as wide.
This
was a fur! Wonderful, wonderful. But she just stood, looking up, mouth open and
lips pulled back, the fur on the back of her neck rising more from the
suddenness than from fear.
It
was silver and black, a tiger-striped thing, and the whitish parts glistened
and caught the light as the ice of Jaxa did, and sparkled and dazzled in the
same way. And there, in the center of the face, was a large and terrible orange
eye, rimmed in black with black radiating lines crossing the forehead and
rounding the head. That spot of orange dominated the whole figure, but it was a
flat, blind eye, unreal, grown out of fur. At first she saw only that spot of
color, but then she noticed under it two small, red glinting eyes and they were
kind, not terrible.
This was the time for the call: Come, come
and get the great fur, the huge-price-tag fur for the richest lady on earth to
wear and be dazzling in and most of all to pay for. But there was something
about the flat, black nose and the tender, bow-shaped lips and those kind eyes
that stopped her from calling. Something masterlike. She was full of wondering
and indecision and she made no sound at all.
The
thing spoke to her then, and its voice was a deep lullaby sound of buzzing
cellos. It gestured with a thick, fur-backed hand. It promised, offered, and
asked; and she listened, knowing and not knowing.
The words came slowly. This ...
is ... world.
Here
is the sky, the earth, the ice. The heavy arms moved. The hands pointed.
We
have watched you, little slave. What have you done that is free today? Take the
liberty. Here is the earth for your four shoed feet, the sky of stars, the ice to drink. Do something
free today. Do, do.
Nice
voice, she thought, nice thing. It gives and gives ... something.
Her
ears pointed forward, then to the side, one and then the> other, and then
forward again. She cocked her head, but the real meaning would not come clear.
She poked at the air with her nose. Say that again, her whole body said. I almost
have it. I feel
it. Say it once more and
maybe then the sense of it will come.
But
the creature turned and started away quickly, very quickly for such a big
thing, and disappeared behind the trees and bushes. It seemed to shimmer itself
away until the glitter was only the glitter of the ice and the black was only
the thick, flat branches.
The
master was close. She could hear his crackling steps coming up behind her.
She whined softly, more to
herself than to him.
"Ho,
the Queen, Aloora. Have you lost it?" She sniffed the ground again. The
honey-furry smell was strong. She sniffed beyond, zigzagging. The trail was
there. "Go to it, Baby." She loped off to a sound like Chinese wind
chimes, businesslike again. Her tail hung guiltily, though, and she kept her
head low. She had missed an important signal. She'd waited until it was too
late. But was the thing a man, a master? Or a fur? She wanted to do the right
thing. She always tried and tried for that, but now she was confused.
She
was getting close to whatever it was she trailed, but the hovering smell was
still there too, though not close. She thought of gifts. She knew that much
from the slow, lullaby words, and gifts made her think of bones and meat, not
the dry fishy biscuit she always got on trips like this. A trickle of drool
flowed from the side of her mouth and froze in a silver thread across her
shoulder.
She
slowed. The thing she trailed must be there, just behind the next row of
trees. She made a sound in her throat ..
. ready, steady . . . and she advanced until she was sure. She sensed the
shape. She didn't really see it. . . mostly it was the smell and something more
in the tinkling glassware noises. She gave the signal and stood still, a furry,
square imitation of a pointer. Come, hurry. This waiting is the hardest part.
He
followed, beamed to her radio. "Steady, Baby. Hold that pose. Good girl,
good girl." There was only the slightest twitch of her tail as she wagged
it, answering him in her mind.
He
came up behind her and then passed, crouched, holding the rifle before him,
elbows bent. He knelt then, and waited as if at a point of his own, rifle to
shoulder. Slowly he turned with the moving shadow of the beast, and shot, twice
in quick succession.
They
ran forward then, together, and it was what she had expected—a deerlike thing,
dainty hoofs, proud head, and spotted in three colors, large gray-green rounds
on tawny yellow, with tufts of that same glittering silver scattered over.
The
master took out a sharp, flat-bladed knife. He began to whistle out loud as he
cut off the handsome head. His face was flushed.
She
sat down near by, mouth open in a kind of smile, and she watched his face as he
worked. The warm smell made the drool come at the sides of her mouth and drip
out to freeze on the ice and on her paws, but she sat quietly, only watching.
Between
the whistlings he grunted and swore and talked to himself, and finally he had
the skin and the head in a tight, inside out bundle.
Then he came to her and patted her sides over
the ribs with the fiat, slap sound, and he scratched behind her ears and held a
biscuit to her on his thick-gloved palm. She swallowed it whole and then
watched him as he squatted on his heels and himself ate one almost like it.
Then
he got up and slung the bundle of skin and head across his back. "I'll
take this one, Baby. Come on, let's get one more something before lunch."
He waved her to the right. "We'll make a big circle," he said.
She
trotted out, glad she was not carrying anything. She found a strong smell at a
patch of discolored ice and urinated on it. She sniffed and growled at a
furry, mammal-smelling bird that landed in the trees above her and sent down a
shower of ice slivers on her head. She zigzagged and then turned and bit, lips
drawn back in mock rage, at a branch that scraped her side.
She
followed for a while the chattery sound of water streaming along under the ice,
and left it where an oily, lambish smell crossed. Almost immediately she came
upon them—six, small, greenish balls of wool with floppy, woolly feet. The
honey-fat man smell was strong here too, but she signaled for the lambs, the
Come and shoot sound, and she stood again waiting for the master. "Good girl!" His voice had a special praise.
"By God, this place is a gold mine. Hold it, Queen of Venus. Whatever it
is, don't let go."
There
was a fifty-yard clear view here and she stood in plain sight of the little
creatures, but they didn't notice. The master came slowly and cautiously, and
knelt beside her. Just as he did, there appeared at the far end of the clearing
a glittering, silver and black tiger-striped man.
She
heard the sharp inward breath of the master and she felt the tenseness come to
him. There was a new, faint whiff of sour sweat, a stiff silence and a special
way of breathing. What she felt from him made the fur rise along her back with
a mixture of excitement and fear.
The
tiger thing held a small packet in one hand and was peering into it and pulling
at the opening in it with a blunt finger. Suddenly there was a sweep of motion
beside her and five fast, frantic shots sounded sharp in her ear. Two came
after the honey-fat man had already fallen and lay like a huge decorated sack.
The
master ran forward and she came at his heels. They stopped, not too close, and
she watched the master looking at the big, dead tiger head with the terrible
eye. The master was breathing hard and seemed hot. His face was red and puffy
looking, but his lips made a hard whitish line. He didn't whistle or talk.
After a time he took out his knife. He tested the blade, making a small, bloody
thread of a mark on his left thumb. Then he walked closer and she stood and
watched him and whispered a questioning whine.
He
stooped by the honey-fat man and it was that small, partly opened packet that
he cut viciously through the center. Small round chunks fell out, bite-sized
chunks of dried meat and a cheesy substance and some broken bits of clear,
bluish ice.
The
master kicked at them. His face was not red any more, but olive-pale. His thin
mouth was open in a grin that was not a grin. He went about the skinning then.
He
did not keep the flat-faced, heavy head nor the blunt-fingered hands.
The man had to make a sliding thing of two of
the widest kind of flat branches to carry the new heavy fur, as well as the
head and the skin of the deer. Then he started directly for the ship.
It
was past eating time but she looked at his restless eyes and did not ask about
it. She walked before him, staying close. She looked back often, watching him
pull the sled thing by the string across his shoulder and she knew, by the way
he held the rifle before him in both hands, that she should be wary.
Sometimes
the damp-looking, inside-out bundle hooked on things, and the master would
curse in a whisper and pull at it. She could see the bundle made him tired, and
she wished he would stop for a rest and food as they usually did long before
this time.
They
went slowly, and the smell of honey-fat man hovered as it had from the
beginning. They crossed the trails of many animals. They even saw another deer
run off, but she knew that it was not a time for chasing.
Then
another big silver and black tiger stood exactly before them. It appeared
suddenly, as if actually it had been standing there all the time, and they had
not been near enough to see it, to pick it out from its glistening background.
It just stood and looked and dared, and the
master held his gun with both hands and looked too, and she stood between them
glancing from one face to the other. She knew, after a moment, that the master
would not shoot, and it seemed the tiger thing knew too, for it turned to look
at her and it raised its arms and spread its fingers as if grasping at the
forest on each side. It swayed a bit, like bigness off balance, and then it
spoke in its tight-strung, cello tones. The words and the tone seemed the same
as before.
Little
slave, what have you done that is free today? Remember this is world. Do
something free today. Do, do.
She
knew that what it said was important to it, something she should understand, a
giving and a taking away. It watched her, and she looked back with wide,
innocent eyes, wanting to do the right thing, but not knowing what.
The
tiger-fat man turned then, this time slowly, and left a wide back for the
master and her to see, and then it half turned, throwing a quick glance over
the heavy humped shoulder at the two of them. Then it moved slowly away into
the trees and ice, and the master still held the gun with two hands and did not
move.
The
evening wind began to blow, and there sounded about them that sound of a
million chandeliers tinkling and clinking like gigantic wind chimes. A furry
bird, the size of a shrew and as fast, flew by between them with a miniature
shriek.
She
watched the master's face, and when he was ready she went along beside him. The
soft sounds the honey-fat man had made echoed in her mind but had no meaning.
That night the master stretched the big skin
on a frame and afterward he watched the dazzle of it. He didn't talk to her.
She watched him a while and then she turned around three times on her rug and
lay down to sleep.
The
next morning the master was slow, reluctant to go out. He studied charts of
other places, round or hourglass-shaped maps with yellow dots and labels, and
he drank his coffee standing up looking at them. But finally they did go out,
squinting into the ringing air.
It
was her world. More each day, she felt it was so, right feel, right
temperature, lovely smells. She darted on ahead as usual, yet not too far
today, and sometimes she stopped and waited and looked at the master's face as
he came up. And sometimes she would whine a question before she went on .. . Why don't you walk brisk, brisk, and
call me Queen of Venus, Aloora, Galaxa, or Bitch of Betelgeuse? Why don't you
sniff like I do? Sniff, and you will be happy with this place . . . And she
would run on again.
Trails
were easy to find, and once more she found the oily lamb smell, and once more
came upon them quickly. The master strode up beside her and raised his gun . .
. but a moment later he turned, carelessly, letting himself make a loud noise,
and the lambs ran. He made a face, and spit upon the ice. "Come on, Queen.
Let's get out of here. I'm sick of this place."
He turned and made the signal to go back,
pointing with his thumb above his head in two jerks of motion.
But
why, why? This is morning now and our world. She wagged her tail and gave a
short bark, and looked at him, dancing a little on her back paws, begging with
her whole body. "Come on," he said.
She
turned then, and took her place at his heel, head low, but eyes looking up at
him, wondering if she had done something wrong, and wanting to be right and
noticed and loved because he was troubled and preoccupied.
They'd
gone only a few minutes on the way back when he stopped suddenly in the middle
of a step, slowly put both feet flat upon the ground and stood like a soldier
at a stiff, off-balance attention. There, lying in the way before them, was the
huge, orange-eyed head and in front of it, as if at the end of outstretched
arms, lay two leathery hands, the hairless palms up.
She
made a growl deep in her throat and the master made a noise almost exactly like
hers, but more a groan. She waited for him, standing as he stood, not moving,
feeling his tenseness coming in to her. Yet it was just a head and two hands of
no value, old ones they had had before and thrown away.
He
turned and she saw a wild look in his eyes. He walked with deliberate steps,
and she followed, in a wide circle about the spot. When they had skirted the place,
he began to walk very fast.
They
were not far from the ship. She could see its flat blackness as they drew
nearer to the clearing where it was, the burned, iceless pit of spewed and
blackened earth. And then she saw that the silver tiger men were there, nine of
them in a wide circle, each with the honey-damp fur smell, but each with a
separate particular sweetness.
The
master was still walking very fast, eyes down to watch his footing, and he did
not see them until he was there in the circle before them all, standing there
like nine upright bears in tiger suits.
He
stopped and made a whisper of a groan, and he let the gun fall low in one hand
so that it hung loose with the muzzle almost touching the ground. He looked
from one to the other and she looked at him, watching his pale eyes move along
the circle.
"Stay,"
he said, and then he began to go toward the ship at an awkward limp, running
and walking at the same time, banging the gun handle against the air lock as he
entered.
He
had said, Stay. She sat watching the ship door and moving her front paws up and
down because she wanted to be walking after him. He was gone only a few
minutes, though, and when he came back it was without the gun and he was
holding the great fur with cut pieces of thongs dangling like ribbons along
its edges where it had been tied to the stretching frame. He went at that same
run-walk, unbalanced by the heavy bundle, to one of them along the circle.
Three gathered together before him and refused to take it back. They pushed it,
bunched loosely, back across his arms again and to it they added another large
and heavy package in a parchment bag, and the master stood, with his legs wide
to hold it all.
Then
one honey-fat man motioned with a fur-backed hand to the ship and the bundles,
and then to the ship and the master, and then to the sky. He made two sharp
sounds once, and then again. And another made two different sounds, and she
felt the feeling of them . . . Take your things and go home. Take them, these
and these, and go.
They turned to her then and one spoke and
made a wide gesture. This
is world. The sky, the earth, the ice.
They
wanted her to stay. They gave her . . . was it their world? But what good was a
world?
She
wagged her tail hesitatingly, lowered her head and looked up at them... I do want to do right, to please every
body, everybody, but... Then she followed the master into the ship.
The
locks rumbled shut. "Let's get out of here," he said. She took her
place, flat on her side, take-off position. The master snapped the flat plastic
sheet over her, covering head and all and, in a few minutes, they roared off.
Afterward he opened the parchment bag. She
knew what was in it. She knew he knew too, but she knew by the smell. He opened
it and dumped out the head and the hands. His face was tight and his mouth
stiff.
She
saw him almost put the big head out the waste chute, but he didn't. He took it
in to the place where he kept good heads and some odd paws or hoofs, and he put
it by the others there.
Even
she knew this head was different. The others were all slant-browed like she was
and most had jutting snouts. This one seemed bigger than the big ones, with its
heavy, ruffed fur and huge eye staring, and more grand than any of them, more
terrible . . . and yet a flat face, with a delicate, black nose and tender
lips.
The tenderest lips of all.
STRANGER STATION
Damon Knight
Damon Knight has
worked at every conceivable job in science fiction: writer, editor, critic,
translator, anthologist, illustrator, agent. A founder, and now sole Director,
of the Milford Science Fiction Writer's Conference, he also helped to found,
and became first President of, the Science Fiction Writers of America, and
edited the first volume of its annual Nebula Award Stories. He is currently a consulting editor for Berkley Books, and editor of the
Putnam-Berkley Orbit
anthologies of original
science-fiction.
Born
in Oregon in 1922, Knight came to New York in the aftermath of a
science-fiction fan convention in 1941—the same year his first story appeared
in Stirring Science
Stories. In
1950—51, he was editor of the magazine. Worlds Beyond, and
his first book. In Search
of Wonder, a volume of science-fiction criticism for
which he received a "Hugo" award, was published in 1956. Since then
he has published five novels and five story collections, and almost 20
anthologies. He now lives in Milford, Pa., and is married to author Kate
Wilhelm. Latest books: Worlds
to Come, a
juvenile anthology (1967); and a new and enlarged edition of fn Search of
Wonder (Advent, 1967). A
translation of a novel by René Barjavel, Ashes, Ashes, is due shortly.
Knight's
stories have appeared in three SF Annuals: "The Country of the Kind"
was in the 1st, and "The Handler" in the 5th. "Stranger
Station", from the Dec, 1956, Fantasy & Science Fiction, appeared in the 2nd Annual.
The clang of metal echoed hollowly down through the Station's
many vaulted corridors and rooms. Paul Wesson stood listening for a moment as
the rolling echoes died away. The maintenance rocket was gone, heading back to
Home; they had left him alone in Stranger Station.
Stranger Station! The name itself quickened
his imagination. Wesson knew that both orbital stations had been named a
century ago by the then British administration of the satellite service:
"Home" because the larger, inner station handled the traffic of
Earth and its colonies; "Stranger" because the outer station was
designed specifically for dealings with foreigners . . . beings from outside
the solar system. But even that could not diminish the wonder of Stranger
Station, whirling out here alone in the dark-r-waiting for its once-in-two-decades visitor. . . .
One
man, out of all Sol's billions, had the task and privilege of enduring the
alien's presence when it came. The two races, according to Wesson's
understanding of the subject, were so fundamentally different that it was painful
for them to meet. Well, he had volunteered for the job, and he thought he could
handle it—the rewards were big enough.
He
had gone through all the tests, and against his own expectations he had been
chosen. The maintenance crew had brought him up as dead weight, drugged in a
survival hamper; they had kept him the same way while they did their work, and
then had brought him back to consciousness. Now they were gone. He was alone.
... But not quite.
"Welcome
to Stranger Station, Sergeant Wesson," said a pleasant voice. "This
is your alpha network speaking. I'm here to protect and serve you in every way.
If there's anything you want, just ask me."
Wesson
had been warned, but he was still shocked at the human quality of it. The alpha
networks were the last word in robot brains—computers, safety devices, personal
servants, libraries, all wrapped up in one, with something so close to
"personality" and "free will" that experts were still
arguing the question. They were rare and fantastically expensive; Wesson had
never met one before.
"Thanks,"
he said now, to the empty air. "Uh—what do I call you, by the way? I can't
keep saying, 'Hey, alpha network.' "
"One of your recent
predecessors called me Aunt Nettie."
Wesson
grimaced. Alpha network—Aunt Nettie. He hated puns; that wouldn't do. "The
Aunt part is all right," he said. "Suppose I call you Aunt Jane. That
was my mother's sister; you sound like her, a little bit."
"I am honored," said the invisible
mechanism politely. "Can I serve you any refreshments now? Sandwiches? A
drink?"
"Not just yet,"
said Wesson.
He
turned away. That seemed to end the conversation as far as the network was
concerned. A good thing; it was all right to have it for company, speaking when
spoken to, but if it got talkative...
The
human part of the Station was in four segments: bedroom, living room, dining
room, bath. The living room was comfortably large and pleasantly furnished in
greens and tans: the only mechanical note in it was the big instrument console
in one corner. The other rooms, arranged in a ring around the living room; were
tiny: just space enough for Wesson, a narrow encircling corridor, and the mechanisms
that would serve him. The whole place was spotlessly clean, gleaming and
efficient in spite of its twenty-year layoff.
This
is the gravy part of the run, Wesson told himself. The month before the alien came—good food, no work,
and an alpha network for conversation. "Aunt Jane, I'll have a small steak
now," he said to the network. "Medium rare, with hash-brown potatoes,
onions and mushrooms, and a glass of lager. Call me when it's ready."
"Right,"
said the voice pleasantly. Out in the dining room, the autochef began to hum
and cluck self-im-portantly. Wesson wandered over and inspected the instrument
console. Airlocks were sealed and tight, said the dials; the air was cycling.
The Station was in orbit, and rotating on its axis with a force at the
perimeter, where Wesson was, of one g. The
internal temperature of this part of the Station was an even 73°.
The
other side of the board told a different story; all the dials were dark and
dead. Sector Two, occupying a volume some eighty-eight thousand times as great
as this one, was not yet functioning.
Wesson
had a vivid mental image of the Station, from photographs and diagrams—a
500-foot duralumin sphere, onto which the shallow 30-foot disk of the human
section had been stuck apparently as an afterthought. The whole cavity of the
sphere, very nearly—except for a honeycomb of supply and maintenance rooms, and
the all-important,
recently enlarged vats—was one cramped chamber for the alien....
The steak was good, bubbling crisp outside
the way he liked it, tender and pink inside. "Aunt Jane," he said
with his mouth full, "this is pretty soft, isn't it?"
"The
steak?" asked the voice, with a faintly anxious note.
Wesson
grinned. "Never mind," he said. "Listen, Aunt Jane, you've been
through this routine... how many
times? Were you installed with the Station, or what?"
"I
was not installed with the Station," said Aunt Jane primly. "I have
assisted at three contacts."
"Um.
Cigarette," said Wesson, slapping his pockets. The autochef hummed for a
moment, and popped a pack of G.I.'s out of a vent. Wesson lit up. "All
right," he said, "you've been through this three times. There are a
lot of things you can tell me, right?"
"Oh, yes, certainly.
What would you like to know?"
Wesson
smoked, leaning back reflectively, green eyes narrowed. "First," he
said, "read me the Pigeon report—you know, from the Brief History. I want to see if I remember it right."
"Chapter
Two," said the voice promptly. "First contact with a non-Solar intelligence
was made by Commander Ralph C. Pigeon on July 1, 1987, during an emergency
landing in Titan. The following is an excerpt from his official report:
"'While searching for a possible cause for our mental disturbance, we discovered what appeared
to be a gigantic construction of
metal on the far side of the ridge.
Our distress grew stronger with the approach to this construction, which was
polyhedral and approximately five times the length of the Cologne.
"
'Some of those present expressed a wish to retire, but Lt. Acuff and myself had a strong sense of being called
or summoned in some indefinable way. Although our uneasiness was not lessened,
we therefore agreed to go forward and keep radio contact with the rest of the party while they returned to the
ship.
"
'We gained access to the alien construction by
way of a large, irregular opening ...
The internal temperature was minus seventy-five degrees Fahrenheit; the atmosphere appeared to
consist of methane and ammonia . . . Inside the second chamber, an alien
creature was waiting for us. We felt the distress which I have tried to
describe, to a much greater degree than before, and also the sense of summoning
or pleading ... We observed that the creature was exuding a thick yellowish
fluid from certain joints or pores in its surface. Though disgusted, I managed
to collect a sample of this exudate, and it was later forwarded for analysis .
. .'
"The second contact
was made ten years later by Commodore Crawford's famous Titan
Expedition—"
"No,
that's enough," said Wesson. "I just wanted the Pigeon quote."
He smoked, brooding. "It seems kind of chopped off, doesn't it? Have you
got a longer version in your memory banks anywhere?"
There was a pause.
"No," said Aunt Jane.
"There
was more to it when I was a kid," Wesson complained nervously. "I
read that book when I was twelve, and I remember a long description of the
alien . . . that is, I remember its being there." He swung around.
"Listen, Aunt Jane-^-you're a sort of Universal watchdog, that right? You've
got cameras and mikes all over the Station?"
"Yes,"
said the network, sounding—was it Wesson's imagination?—faintly injured.
"Well,
what about Sector Two—you must have cameras up there, too, isn't that so?"
"Yes."
"All
right, then you can tell me. What do the aliens look like?"
There
was a definite pause. "I'm sorry, I can't tell you that," said Aunt
Jane.
"No,"
said Wesson, "I didn't think you could. You've got orders not to, I guess,
for the same reason those history books have been cut since I was a kid. Now,
what would the reason be? Have you got any idea, Aunt Jane?"
There was another pause.
"Yes," the voice admitted.
"Well?"
"I'm sorry, I
can't—"
"—tell you that," Wesson repeated
along with it. "All right. At least we know where we stand."
"Yes, sergeant. Would you like some dessert?"
"No
dessert. One other thing. What happens to Station watchmen, like me, after their tour of
duty?"
"They
are upgraded to Class Seven, students with unlimited leisure, and receive
outright gifts of seven thousand stellors, plus free Class One housing—"
"Yeah,
I know all that," said Wesson, licking his dry lips. "But here's what
I'm asking you. The ones you knew— what kind of shape were they in when they
left here?"
"The
usual human shape," said the voice brightly. "Why do you ask,
sergeant?"
Wesson
made a discontented gesture. "Something I remember from a bull session at
the Academy. I can't get it out of my head; I know it had something to do with
the Station. Just a part of a sentence—'blind as a bat, and white bristles all over.' Now, would that be a description of the alien
... or the watchman when they came to
take him away?"
Aunt Jane went into one of her heavy pauses.
"All right, I'll save you the trouble," said Wesson. "You're
sorry, you can't tell me that."
"I am sorry," said the robot, sincerely.
Aunt Jane was a model companion. She had a
record library of thousands of hours of music; she had films to show him, and
micro-printed books that he could read on the scanner in the living room; or if
he preferred, she would read to him. She controlled the Station's three
telescopes, and on request would give him a view of Earth, or the Moon, or Home....
But there was no news. Aunt Jane would
obligingly turn on the radio receiver if he asked her, but nothing except
static came out. That was the thing that weighed most heavily on Wesson, as
time passed: the knowledge that radio silence was being imposed on all ships in
transit, on the orbital stations, and on the planet-to-space transmitters. It
was an enormous, almost a crippling handicap. Some information could be
transmitted over relatively short distances by photophone, but ordinarily the
whole complex traffic of the spacelanes depended on radio.
But
this coming alien contact was so delicate a thing that even a radio voice, out
here where the Earth was only a tiny disk twice the size of the Moon, might
upset it. It was so
precarious a thing, Wesson thought, that only one man could be allowed in the
Station while the alien was there, and to give that man the company that would
keep him sane, they had to install an alpha network. . . . "Aunt
Jane?"
The voice answered promptly, "Yes, Paul." "This distress
that the books talk about—you wouldn't know what it is, would you?"
"No, Paul."
"Because robot brains don't feel it,
right?" "Right, Paul."
"So
tell me this—why do they need a man here at all? Why can't they get along with
just you?"
A
pause. "I don't know, Paul." The voice sounded faintly wistful.
He
got up from the living-room couch and paced restlessly back and forth.
"Let's have a look at Earth," he said. Obediently, the viewing screen
on the console glowed into life: there was the blue Earth, swimming deep below
him, in its first quarter, jewel-bright. "Switch it off," Wesson
said.
"A
little music?" suggested the voice, and immediately began to play
something soothing, full of woodwinds.
"No," said Wesson. The music stopped.
Wesson's
hands were trembling; he had a caged and frustrated feeling.
The
fitted suit was in its locker beside the air lock. Wesson had been topside in
it once or twice; there was nothing to see up there, just darkness and cold.
But he had to get out of this squirrel-cage. He took the suit down.
"Paul,"
said Aunt Jane anxiously, "are you feeling nervous?"
"Yes," he snarled.
"Then don't go into Sector Two," said Aunt Jane. "Don't
tell me what to do, you hunk of tin!" said Wesson with sudden anger. He
zipped up the front of his suit. Aunt Jane was silent.
The
air lock, an upright tube barely large enough for one man, was the only passage
between Sector One and Sector Two. It was also the only exit from Sector One;
to get here in the first place, Wesson had had to enter the big lock at the
"south" pole of the sphere, and travel all the way down inside by
drop-hole and catwalk. He had been drugged unconscious at the time, of course.
When the time came, he would go out the same way; neither the maintenance
rocket nor the tanker had any space, or time, to spare.
At
the "north" pole opposite, there was a third air lock, this one so
huge it could easily have held an interplanet freighter. But that was nobody's
business—no human being's.
In
the beam of Wesson's helmet lamp, the enormous central cavity of the Station
was an inky gulf that sent back only remote, mocking glimmers of light The near
walls sparkled with hoar-frost. Sector Two was not yet pressurized; there was
only a diffuse vapor that had leaked through the airseal, and had long since
frozen into the powdery deposit that lined the walls. The metal rang cold
under his shod feet; the vast emptiness of the chamber was the more depressing
because it was airless, unwarmed and unlit. Alone, said his footsteps; alone...
He
was thirty yards up the catwalk when his anxiety suddenly grew stronger.
Wesson stopped in spite of himself, and turned clumsily, putting his back to
the wall. The support of the solid wall was not enough. The catwalk seemed
threatening to tilt underfoot, dropping him into the gulf.
Wesson
recognized this drained feeling, this metallic taste at the back of his tongue.
It was fear.
The
thought ticked through his head, They want me to be afraid. But why? Why now? Of what?
Equally
suddenly, he knew. The nameless pressure tightened, like a great fist closing,
and Wesson had the appalling sense of something so huge that it had no limits
at all, descending, with a terrible endless swift slowness. . . .
His first month was up.
The alien was coming.
As
Wesson turned, gasping, the whole huge structure of the Station around him
seemed to dwindle to the size of an ordinary room ... and Wesson with it, so that he seemed to himself like a tiny
insect, frantically scuttling down the walls toward safety.
Behind him as he
ran, the Station boomed.
In the silent rooms, all the lights were
burning dimly. Wesson lay still, looking at the ceiling. Up there, his imagination
formed a shifting, changing image of the alien— huge, shadowy, formlessly
menacing.
Sweat
had gathered in globules on his brow. He stared, unable to look away.
"That
was why you didn't want me to go topside, huh, Aunt Jane?"
"Yes.
The nervousness is the first sign. But you gave me a direct order, Paul."
"I
know it," he said vaguely, still staring fixedly at the ceiling. "A
funny thing ... Aunt Jane?"
"Yes, Paul."
"You won't tell me what it looks like,
right?" "No,
Paul."
"I
don't want to know. Lord, I don't want to
know . . . Funny thing, Aunt Jane, part of me is just pure funk—I'm so scared,
I'm nothing but a jelly—"
"I know," said the voice gently.
"—and part is real cool and calm, as if
it didn't matter. Crazy, the things you think about. You know?" "What
things, Paul?"
He
tried to laugh. "I'm remembering a kids' party I went to' twenty . . .
twenty-five years ago. I was, let's see, I was nine. I remember, because that
was the same year my father died.
"We
were living in Dallas then, in a rented mobilehouse, and there was a family in
the next tract with a bunch of redheaded kids. They were always throwing
parties; nobody liked them much, but everybody always went."
"Tell me about the party, Paul."
He
shifted on the couch. "This one, this one was a Hallowe'en party. I remember
the girls had on black and orange dresses, and the boys mostly wore spirit
costumes. I was about the youngest kid there, and I felt kind of out of place.
Then all of a sudden one of the redheads jumps up in a skull mask, hollering,
'C'mon, everybody get ready for hidenseek.' And he grabs me, and says, 'You
be it,' and before I can
even move, he shoves me into a dark closet. And I hear that door lock behind
me."
He
moistened his lips. "And then—you know, in the darkness—I feel something
hit my face.
You know, cold and clammy,
ljke, I don't know, something dead. ..
.
"I just hunched up on the floor of that
closet, waiting for that thing to touch me again. You know? That thing, cold
and kind of gritty, hanging up there. You know what it was? A cloth glove, full
of ice and bran cereal. A joke. Boy, that was one joke I never forgot.. .. Aunt Jane?" "Yes, Paul."
"Hey,
I'll bet you alpha networks make great psychs, huh? I could lie here and tell
you anything, because you're just a machine—right?"
"Right, Paul,"
said the network sorrowfully.
"Aunt
Jane, Aunt Jane . . . It's no use kidding myself along, I can feel that thing up there, just a couple of yards away."
"I know you can,
Paul."
"I can't stand it,
Aunt Jane."
"You can if you think
you can, Paul."
He
writhed on the couch. "It's—it's dirty, it's clammy. My God, is it going
to be like that for five
months? I
can't, it'll kill me, Aunt Jane."
There
was another thunderous boom, echoing down through the structural members of the
Station. "What's that?" Wesson gasped. "The other ship—casting
off?"
"Yes. Now he's alone,
just as you are."
"Not
like me. He can't be feeling what I'm feeling. Aunt Jane, you don't know ..."
Up there, separated from him only by a few
yards of metal, the alien's enormous, monstrous body hung. It was that poised
weight, as real as if he could touch it, that weighed down his chest.
Wesson had been a space-dweller for most of
his adult life, and knew even in his bones that if an orbital station ever
collapsed, the "under" part would not be crushed but would be hurled
away by its own angular momentum. This was not the oppressiveness of planetside
buildings, where the looming mass above you seemed always threatening to fall:
this was something else, completely distinct, and impossible to argue away.
It
was the scent of danger, hanging unseen up there in the dark, waiting, cold and
heavy. It was the recurrent nightmare of Wesson's childhood—the bloated unreal
shape, no-color, no-size, that kept on hideously falling toward his face.... It was the dead puppy he had
pulled out of the creek, that summer in Dakota...
wet fur, limp head, cold, cold, cold....
With
an effort, Wesson rolled over on the couch and lifted himself to one elbow. The
pressure was an insistent chill weight on his skull; the room seemed to dip and
swing around in slow circles.
Wesson
felt his jaw muscles contorting with the strain as he knelt, then stood erect.
His back and legs tightened; his mouth hung painfully open. He took one step,
then another, timing them to hit the floor as it came upright.
The
right side of the console, the one that had been dark, was lighted. Pressure in
Sector Two, according to the indicator, was about one and a third atmospheres.
The air lock indicator showed a slightly higher pressure of oxygen and argon;
that was to keep any of the alien atmosphere from contaminating Sector One, but
it also meant that the lock would no longer open from either side.
"Lemme see
Earth," he gasped.
The
screen lighted up as he stared into it. "It's a long way down," he
said. A long, long way down to the bottom of that well. ... He had spent ten featureless years as a servo tech in Home
Station. Before that, he'd wanted to be a pilot, but had washed out the first
years—couldn't take the math. But he had never once thought of going back to
Earth.
"Aunt Jane, Aunt Jane,
it's beautiful," he mumbled.
Down
there, he knew, it was spring; and in certain places, where the edge of
darkness retreated, it was morning: a watery blue morning like the sea light
caught in an agate, a morning with smoke and mist in it; a morning of stillness
and promise. Down there, lost years and miles away, some tiny dot of a woman
was opening her microscopic door to listen to an atom's song. Lost, lost, and
packed away in cotton wool, like a specimen slide: one spring morning on Earth.
Black
miles above, so far that sixty Earths could have been piled one on another to
make a pole for his perch, Wesson swung in his endless circle within a circle.
Yet, vast as was the gulf beneath him, all this—Earth, Moon, orbital stations,
ships; yes, the Sun and all the rest of his planets, too—was the merest sniff
of space, to be pinched up between thumb and finger.
Beyond—there was the true gulf. In that deep
night, galaxies lay sprawled aglitter, piercing a distance that could only be
named in a meaningless number, a cry of dismay:
o,o,o....
Crawling
and fighting, blasting with energies too big for them, men had come as far as
Uranus. But if a man had been tall enough to lie with his boots toasting in the
Sun and his head freezing at Pluto, still he would have been too small for that
overwhelming emptiness. Here, not at Pluto, was the outermost limit of man's empire: here the Outside funneled down to meet it, like the
pinched waist of an hour-glass: here, and only here, the two worlds came near
enough to touch. Ours—and Theirs.
Down
at the bottom of the board, now, the golden dials were faintly alight, the
needles trembling ever so little on their pins.
Deep
in the vats, the vats, the golden liquid was trickling down: "Though disgusted, I took a sample of
the exudate and it was forwarded for analysis. . . ."
Space-cold
fluid, trickling down the bitter walls of the tubes, forming little pools in
the cups of darkness; goldenly agleam there, half-alive. The golden elixir. One
drop of the concentrate would arrest aging for twenty years—keep your arteries
soft, tonus good, eyes clear, hair pigmented, brain alert.
That
was what the tests of Pigeon's sample had showed. That was the reason for the
whole crazy history of the "alien trading post"—first a hut on Titan,
then later, when people understood more about the problem, Stranger Station.
Once every twenty years, an alien would come
down out of Somewhere, and sit in the tiny cage we had made for him, and make
us rich beyond our dreams—rich with life ...
and still we did not know why.
Above
him, Wesson imagined he could see that sensed body a-wallow in the glacial
blackness, its bulk passively turning with the Station's spin, bleeding a chill
gold into the lips of the tubes: drip, drop.
Wesson
held his head. The pressure inside made it hard to think; it felt as if his
skull were about to fly apart. "Aunt Jane," he said.
"Yes, Paul." The kindly, comforting
voice: like a nurse.
The
nurse who stands beside your cot while you have painful, necessary things done
to you.
"Aunt
Jane," said Wesson, "do you know why they keep coming back?"
"No," said the
voice precisely. "It is a mystery."
Wesson
nodded. "I had," he said, "an interview with Gower before I left
Home. You know Gower? Chief of the Outworld Bureau. Came up especially to see
me."
"Yes?" said Aunt
Jane encouragingly.
"Said
to me, 'Wesson, you got to find out. Find out if we can count on them to keep
up the supply. You know? There's fifty million more of us,' he says, 'than when
you were born. We need more of the stuff, and we got to know if we can count on
it. Because,' he says, 'you know what would happen if it stopped?' Do you know,
Aunt Jane?"
"It would be,"
said the voice, "a catastrophe."
"That's
right," Wesson said respectfully. "It would. Like, he says to me,
'What if the people in the Nefud area were cut off from the Jordan Valley
Authority? Why, there'd be millions dying of thirst in a week.
"
'Or what if the freighters stopped coming to Moon Base. Why,' he says, 'there'd
be thousands starving and smothering.'
"He
says, 'Where the water is, where you can get food and air, people are going to
settle, and get married, you know? and have kids.'
"He
says, 'If the so-called longevity serum stopped coming .. .' Says, 'Every twentieth adult in the Sol family is due for
his shot this year.' Says, 'Of those, almost twenty per cent are one hundred
fifteen or older.' Says, "The deaths in that group, in the first year,
would be at least three times what the actuarial tables call for.'" Wesson
raised a strained face. "I'm thirty-four, you know?" he said.
"That Gower, he made me feel like a baby."
Aunt Jane made a
sympathetic noise.
"Drip,
drip," said Wesson hysterically. The needles of the tall golden indicators
were infinitesimally higher. "Every twenty years, we need more of the
stuff, so somebody like me has to come out and take it for five lousy months.
And one of them
has to come out and sit
there, and drip.
Why, Aunt Jane? What for?
Why should it matter to them whether we live a long time or not? Why do they
keep on
coming back? What do they take away from here?" But to these questions, Aunt Jane had no reply.
All day and every day, the lights burned cold
and steady in the circular gray corridor around the rim of Sector One. The hard
gray flooring had been deeply scuffed in that circular path before Wesson ever
walked there: the corridor existed for that only, like a treadmill in a squirrel
cage; it said "Walk," and Wesson walked. A man would go crazy if he
sat still, with that squirming, indescribable pressure on his head; and so
Wesson paced off the miles, all day and every day, until he dropped like a dead
man in the bed at night.
He talked, too, sometimes to himself,
sometimes to the listening alpha network; sometimes it was difficult to tell
which. "Moss on a rock," he muttered, pacing. "Told him,
wouldn't give twenty mills for any damn shell. . . . Little pebbles down there,
all colors." He shuffled on in silence for a while. Abruptly: "I
don't see why they couldn't have given me a cat."
Aunt
Jane said nothing. After a moment Wesson went on, "Nearly everybody at
Home has a cat, for God's sake, or a goldfish or something. You're all right,
Aunt Jane, but I can't see you. My God, I mean if they couldn't send a
man or woman for company, what I mean, my God, I never liked cats." He swung around the doorway into the bedroom,
and absent-mindedly slammed his fist into the bloody place on the wall.
"But a cat would have been something," he said.
Aunt Jane was still silent.
"Don't
pretend your damn feelings are hurt, I know you, you're only a damn
machine," said Wesson. "Listen, Aunt Jane, I remember a cereal
package one time that had a horse and a cowboy on the side. There wasn't much
room, so about all you saw was their faces. It used to strike me funny how much
they looked alike. Two ears on the top with hair in the middle. Two eyes. Nose.
Mouth with teeth in it. I was thinking, we're kind of distant cousins, aren't
we, us and the horses. But compared to that thing up there—we're brothers. You know?"
"Yes,"
said Aunt Jane, quietly.
"So
I keep asking myself, why couldn't they have sent a
horse, or a cat, instead of a man? But I guess the answer is, because
only a man could take what I'm taking. God, only a man. Right?"
"Right," said
Aunt Jane, with deep sorrow.
Wesson
stopped at the bedroom doorway again and shuddered, holding onto the frame.
"Aunt Jane," he said in a low, clear voice, "you take pictures
of him up there, don't you?"
"Yes, Paul."
"And
you take pictures of me. And then what happens? After it's all over, who looks
at the pictures?"
"I don't know,"
said Aunt Jane humbly.
"You
don't know. But whoever looks at 'em, it doesn't do any good. Right? We got to
find out, why, why, why ... And we
never do find out do we?"
"No," said Aunt
Jane.
"But
don't they figure that if the man who's going through it could see him, he
might be able to tell something? That other people couldn't? Doesn't that make
sense?"
"That's out of my
hands, Paul."
He.
sniggered. "That's funny. Oh, that's funny." He chortled in his
throat, reeling around the circuit. "Yes, that's funny," said Aunt
Jane. "Aunt Jane, tell me what happens to the watchmen." "... I can't tell you that,
Paul."
He
lurched into the living room, sat down before the console, beat on its smooth,
cold metal with his fists. "What are you, some kind of monster? Isn't
there any blood in your veins, damn it, or oil or anything?"
"Please, Paul—"
"Don't
you see, all I want to know, can they talk? Can they tell anything after their
tour is over?" "... No, Paul."
He
stood upright, clutching the console for balance. "They can't? No, I
figured. And you know why?" "No."
"Up
there," said Wesson obscurely. "Moss on the rock."
"Paul, what?"
"We
get changed," said Wesson, stumbling out of the room again. "We get
changed. Like a piece of iron next to a magnet Can't help it You—nonmagnetic, I
guess. Goes right through you, huh, Aunt Jane? You don't get changed. You stay
here, wait for the next one." "Yes," said Aunt Jane.
"You know," said Wesson, pacing,
"I can tell how he's lying up there. Head that way, tail the other. Am I right?" "...
Yes," said Aunt Jane.
Wesson stopped. "Yes," he said
intently. "So you can tell me what you see up there, can't you,
Aunt Jane?" "No. Yes. It isn't allowed."
"Listen,
Aunt Jane, we'll
die unless we can find
out what makes those aliens tick! Remember that." Wesson leaned against
the corridor wall, gazing up. "He's turning now— around this way.
Right?"
"Right."
"Well, what else is he
doing? Come on, Aunt Jane!"
A pause. "He is
twitching his ..."
"What?"
"I don't know the
words."
"My
God, my God," said Wesson, clutching his head, "of course there
aren't any words." He ran into the living room, clutched the console and
stared at the blank screen. He pounded the metal with his fist. "You've
got to show me, Aunt Jane, come on and show me, show me!"
"It isn't
allowed," Aunt Jane protested.
"You've
got to do it just the same, or we'll die. Aunt
Jane—millions of us, billions, and it'll be your fault, get it, your fault, Aunt Jane!"
"Please,"
said the voice. There was a
pause. The screen flickered to life, for an instant only. Wesson had a glimpse
of something massive and dark, but half transparent, like a magnified insect—a
tangle of nameless limbs, whiplike filaments, claws, wings ...
He clutched the edge of the
console.
"Was that all
right?" Aunt Jane asked.
"Of
course! What do you think, it'll kill me to look at it? Put it back, Aunt Jane,
put it back!"
Reluctantly,
the screen lighted again. Wesson stared, and went on staring. He mumbled
something.
"What?" said Aunt
Jane.
"Life
of my love, I loathe thee," said Wesson, staring. He roused himself after a moment and turned away.
The image of the alien stayed with him as he went reeling into the corridor
again; he was not surprised to find that it reminded him of all the loathsome,
crawling, creeping things the Earth was full of. That explained why he was not
supposed to see the alien, or even know what it looked like— because that fed
his hate. And it was all right for him to be afraid of the alien, but he was
not supposed to hate it. . . why not? Why not?
His
fingers were shaking. He felt drained, steamed, dried up and withered. The one
daily shower Aunt Jane allowed him was no longer enough. Twenty minutes after
bathing, the acid sweat dripped again from his armpits, the cold sweat was
beaded on his forehead, the hot sweat was in his palms. Wesson felt as if there
were a furnace inside him, out of control, all the dampers drawn. He knew that
under stress, something of the kind did happen to a man: the body's chemistry
was altered—more adrenalin, more glycogen in the muscles; eyes brighter,
digestion retarded. That was the trouble—he was burning himself up, unable to
fight the thing that tormented him, or to run from it.
After
another circuit, Wesson's steps faltered. He hesitated, and went into the
living room. He leaned over the console, staring. From the screen, the alien
stared blindly up into space. Down in the dark side, the golden indicators had
climbed: the vats were more than two-thirds filled.
... to fight, or run ...
Slowly
Wesson sank down in front of the console. He sat hunched, head bent, hands
squeezed tight between his knees, trying to hold onto the thought that had come
to him.
If the alien felt a pain as
great as Wesson's—or greater—
Stress might alter the
alien's body chemistry, too.
Life of my love, I loathe thee.
Wesson
pushed the irrelevant thought aside. He stared at the screen, trying to
envisage the alien, up there, wincing in pain and distress—sweating a golden
sweat of horror....
After
a long time, he stood up and walked into the kitchen. He caught the table edge
to keep his legs from carrying him on around the circuit. He sat down.
Humming
fondly, the autochef slid out a tray of small glasses—water, orange juice,
milk. Wesson put the water glass to his stiff lips; the water was cool, and
hurt his throat. Then the juice, but he could drink only a little of it; then
he sipped the milk. Aunt Jane hummed approvingly.
Dehydrated—how
long had it been since he had eaten, or drunk? He looked at his hands. They
were thin bundles of sticks, ropy-veined, with hard yellow claws. He could see
the bones of his forearms under the skin, and his heart's beating stirred the
cloth at his chest. The pale hairs on his arms and thighs—were they blond, or
white?
The blurred reflections in the metal trim of
the dining room gave him no answers—only pale faceless smears of gray. Wesson
felt light-headed and very weak, as if he had just ended a bout of fever. He
fumbled over his ribs and shoulder-bones. He was thin.
He
sat in front of the autochef for a few minutes more, but no food came out.
Evidently Aunt Jane did not think he was ready for it, and perhaps she was
right. Worse
for them than for us, he
thought dizzily. Thafs why
the Station's so far out; why radio silence, and only one man aboard. They
couldn't stand it at all, otherwise. . . . Suddenly he could think of nothing but
sleep—the bottomless pit, layer after layer of smothering velvet, numbing and
soft. . . . His leg muscles quivered and twitched when he tried to walk, but he
managed to get to the bedroom and fall on the mattress. The resilient block
seemed to dissolve under him. His bones were melting.
He woke with a clear head,
very weak, thinking cold and clear: When two alien cultures meet, the stronger must transform the weaker
with love or hate. "Wesson's
Law," he said aloud. He looked automatically for pencil and paper, but
there was none, and he realized he would have to tell Aunt Jane, and let her
remember it.
"I don't understand," she said.
"Never mind, remember
it anyway. You're good at that, aren't you?" "Yes, Paul."
"All right------ 1 want
some breakfast."
He thought about Aunt Jane, so nearly human,
sitting up here in her metal prison, leading one man after another through the
torments of hell . . . nursemaid, protector, torturer. They must have known
that something would have to give. . . . But the alphas were comparatively new;
nobody understood them very well. Perhaps they really
thought that an absolute prohibition could
never be broken.
. . . the stronger must transform the weaker
. . .
I'm the stronger, he thought. And that's the way it's going to be. He stopped at the console, and the screen was
blank. He said angrily, "Aunt Jane!" And with a guilty start, the
screen flickered into life.
Up
there, the alien had rolled again in his pain. Now the great clustered eyes
were staring directly into the camera; the coiled limbs threshed in pain: the
eyes were staring, asking, pleading ...
'Wo,"
said Wesson, feeling his own pain like an iron cap, and he slammed his hand
down on the manual control. The screen went dark. He looked up, sweating, and
saw the floral picture over the console.
The
thick stems were like antennae, the leaves thoraxes, the buds like blind
insect-eyes. The whole picture moved slightly, endlessly, in a slow waiting
rhythm.
Wesson
clutched the hard metal of the console and stared at the picture, with sweat
cold on his brow, until it turned into a calm, meaningless arrangement of lines
again. Then he went into the dining room, shaking, and sat down.
After a moment he said,
"Aunt Jane, does it get worse?"
"No. From now on, it
gets better."
"How long?" he
asked vaguely.
"One month."
A
month, getting "better" . . . that was the way it had always been,
with the watchman swamped and drowned, his personality submerged. Wesson
thought about the men who had gone before him—Class Seven citizenship, with
unlimited leisure, and Class One housing, yes, sure . . . in a sanatorium.
His
lips peeled back from his teeth, and his fists clenched hard. Not me! he thought.
He
spread his hands on the cool metal to steady them. He said, "How much
longer do they usually stay able to talk?"
"You are already talking
longer than any of them." . . .
Then
there was a blank. Wesson was vaguely aware, in snatches, of the corridor walls
moving past, and the console glimpsed, and of a thunderous cloud of ideas that
swirled around his head in a beating of wings. The aliens: what did they want?
And what happened to the watchmen in Stranger Station?
The haze receded a little, and he was in the
dining room again, staring vacantly at the table. Something was wrong.
He
ate a few spoonfuls of the gruel the autochef served him, then pushed it away;
the stuff tasted faintly unpleasant. The machine hummed anxiously and thrust a
poached egg at him, but Wesson got up from the table.
The
Station was all but silent. The resting rhythm of the household machines
throbbed in the walls, unheard. The blue-lit living room was spread out before
him like an empty stage-setting, and Wesson stared as if he had never seen it
before.
He lurched to the console and stared down at
the pictured alien on the screen: heavy, heavy, asprawl with pain in the
darkness. The needles of the golden indicators were high, the enlarged vats
almost full. It's
too much for him, Wesson
thought with grim satisfaction. The peace that followed the pain had not
descended as it was supposed to; no, not this time!
He glanced
up at the painting over the console: heavy crustacean limbs that swayed
gracefully.
He
shook his head violently. / won't let it; I won't give in! He held the back of one hand close to his eyes. He saw the dozens of
tiny cuneiform wrinkles stamped into the skin over the knuckles, the pale hairs
sprouting, the pink shiny flesh of recent scars. I'm human, he thought. But when he let his hand fall
onto the console, the bony fingers seemed to crouch like crustaceans' legs,
ready to scuttle.
Sweating,
Wesson stared into the screen. Pictured there, the alien met his eyes, and it
was as if they spoke to each other, mind to mind, an instantaneous
communication that needed no words. There was a piercing sweetness in it, a
melting, dissolving luxury of change into something that would no longer have
any pain. ... A pull, a calling.
Wesson
straightened up slowly, carefully, as if he held some fragile thing in his mind
that must not be handled roughly, or it would disintegrate. He said hoarsely,
"Aunt Jane!"
She made some responsive noise.
He
said, "Aunt Jane, I've got the answer! The whole thing! Listen, now,
wait—listen!" He paused a moment to collect his thoughts. "When two alien cultures meet, the
stronger must transform the weaker with love or hate. Remember? You said you didn't understand
what that meant. I'll tell
you what it means. When
these—monsters—met Pigeon a hundred years ago on Titan, they knew we'd have to meet again. They're spreading
out, colonizing, and so are we. We haven't got interstellar flight yet, but
give us another hundred years, we'll get it. We'll wind up out there, where they are. And they can't stop us. Because they're not
killers, Aunt Jane, it isn't in them. They're nicer than us. See, they're like the missionaries, and we're the South Sea
Islanders. They
don't kill their enemies,
oh no—perish the thought!"
She
was trying to say something, to interrupt him, but he rushed on. "Listen!
The longevity serum—that was a lucky accident. But they played it for all it's
worth. Slick and smooth—they come and give us the stuff free—they don't ask for
a thing in return. Why not? Listen.
"They
come here, and the shock of that first contact makes them sweat out that golden
gook we need. Then, the last month or so, the pain always eases off. Why?
Because the two minds, the human and alien, they stop
fighting each other. Something gives way, it goes soft and there's a mixing
together. And that's where you get the human casualties of this operation—the
bleary men that come out of here not even able to talk human language any more.
Oh, I suppose they're happy—happier than I am!—because they've got something
big and wonderful inside 'em. Something that you and I can't even understand.
But if you took them and put them together again with the aliens who spent time
here, they could all live
together—they're adapted.
"That's
what they're aiming for!" He struck the console with his fist. "Not
now—but a hundred, two hundred years from now! When we start expanding out to
the stars— when we go a-conquering—we'll have already been conquered! Not by
weapons, Aunt Jane, not by hate—by love! Yes, love! Dirty, stinking, low-down, sneaking
love!"
Aunt
Jane said something, a long sentence, in a high, anxious voice.
"What?"
said Wesson irritably. He couldn't understand a word.
Aunt Jane was silent. "What, what?"
Wesson demanded, pounding the console. "Have you got it through your tin
head, or not? What?"
Aunt
Jane said something else, tonelessly. Once more, Wesson could not make out a
single word.
He
stood frozen. Warm tears started suddenly out of his eyes. "Aunt
Jane—" he said. He remembered, You are already talking longer than any of them. Too
late? Too late? He tensed, then whirled and sprang to the closet where the
paper books were kept. He opened the first one his hand struck.
The black letters were alien squiggles on the
page, little humped shapes, without meaning.
The
tears were coming faster, he couldn't stop them: tears of weariness, tears of
frustration, tears of hate. "Aunt Jane!" he roared.
But it was no good. The curtain of silence
had come down over his head. He was one of the vanguard—the conquered men, the
ones who would get along with their stranger brothers, out among the alien
stars.
The console was not working any more; nothing
worked when he wanted it. Wesson squatted in the shower stall, naked, with a
soup bowl in his hands. Water droplets glistened on his hands and forearms;
the pale short hairs were just springing up, drying.
The
silvery skin of reflection in the bowl gave him back nothing but a silhouette,
a shadow man's outline. He could not see his face.
He
dropped the bowl and went across the living room, shuffling the pale drifts of
paper underfoot. The black lines on the paper, when his eyes happened to light
on them, were worm-shapes, crawling things, conveying nothing. He rolled
slightly in his walk; his eyes were glazed. His head twitched, every now and
then, sketching a useless motion to avoid pain.
Once
the bureau chief, Gower, came to stand in his way. "You fool," he
said, his face contorted in anger, "you were supposed to go on to the end,
like the rest. Now look what you've done!"
"I
found out, didn't I?" Wesson mumbled, and as he brushed the man aside like
a cobweb, the pain suddenly grew more intense. Wesson clasped his head in his
hands with a grunt, and rocked to and fro a moment, uselessly, before he
straightened and went on. The pain was coming in waves now, so tall that at
their peak his vision dimmed out, violet, then gray.
It couldn't go on much
longer. Something had to burst.
He
paused at the bloody place and slapped the metal with his palm, making the
sound ring dully up into the frame of the Station: rroom, rroom.
Faintly an echo came back: boooom.
Wesson
kept going, smiling a faint and meaningless smile. He was only marking time
now, waiting. Something was about to happen.
The
dining-room doorway sprouted a sudden sill and tripped him. He fell heavily,
sliding on the floor, and lay without moving beneath the slick gleam of the
autochef.
The pressure was too great: the autochefs
clucking was
swallowed up in the ringing pressure, and the tall gray walls
buckled slowly in_____
The Station lurched.
Wesson
felt it through his chest, palms, knees, and elbows: the floor was plucked away
for an instant and then swung back.
The
pain in his skull relaxed its grip a little. Wesson tried to get to his feet.
There
was an electric silence in the Station. On the second try, he got up and
leaned his back against a wall. Cluck, said
the autochef suddenly, hysterically, and the vent popped open, but nothing came
out.
He listened, straining to
hear. What?
The
Station bounced beneath him, making his feet jump like a puppet's; the wall
slapped his back hard, shuddered and was still; but far off through the metal
cage came a long angry groan of metal, echoing, diminishing, dying. Then
silence again.
The
Station held its breath. All the myriad clickings and pulses in the walls were
suspended; in the empty rooms the lights burned with a yellow glare, and the
air hung stagnant and still. The console lights in the living room glowed like
witchfires. Water in the dropped bowl, at the bottom of the shower stall, shone
like quicksilver, waiting.
The
third shock came. Wesson found himself on his hands and knees, the jolt still
tingling in the bones of his body, staring at the floor. The sound that filled
the room ebbed away slowly and ran down into the silences: a resonant metallic
hollow sound, shuddering away now along the girders and hull plates, rattling
tinnily into bolts and fittings, diminishing, noiseless, gone. The silence
pressed down again.
The
floor leaped painfully under his body: one great resonant blow that shook him
from head to foot.
A
muted echo of that blow came a few seconds later, as if the shock had traveled
across the Station and back. The bed, Wesson
thought, and scrambled on hands and knees through the doorway, along a floor
curiously tilted, until he reached the rubbery block.
The
room burst visibly upward around him, squeezing the block flat. It dropped back
as violently, leaving Wesson bouncing helpless on the mattress, his limbs
flying. It came to rest, in a long reluctant groan of metal.
Wesson
rolled up on one elbow, thinking incoherently, Air, the air lock. Another blow slammed him down into the
mattress, pinched his lungs shut, while the room danced grotesquely over his
head. Gasping for breath in the ringing silence, Wesson felt a slow icy chill
rolling toward him across the room . . . and there was a pungent smell in the
air. Ammonia! he thought; and the odorless, smothering
methane with it.
His
cell was breached. The burst membrane was fatal: the alien's atmosphere would
kill him.
Wesson
surged to his feet. The next shock caught him off balance, dashed him to the
floor. He arose again, dazed and limping; he was still thinking confusedly, The air lock, get out.
When
he was halfway to the door, all the ceiling lights went out at once. The
darkness was like a blanket around his head. It was bitter cold now in the
room, and the pungent smell was sharper. Coughing, Wesson hurried forward. The
floor lurched under his feet.
Only
the golden indicators burned now: full to the top, the deep vats brimming,
golden-lipped, gravid, a month before the time. Wesson shuddered.
Water
spurted in the bathroom, hissing steadily on the tiles, rattling in the plastic bowl at the bottom of the
shower stall. The lights winked on and off again. In the dining room, he heard
the autochef clucking and sighing. The freezing wind blew harder: he was numb
with cold to the hips. It seemed to Wesson abruptly that he was not at the top
of the sky at all, but down, down at
the bottom of the sea . . . trapped in this steel bubble, while the dark poured
in.
The pain in his head was gone, as if it had
never been there, and he understood what that meant: Up there, the great body
was hanging like butcher's carrion in the darkness. Its death struggles were
over, the damage done.
Wesson gathered a desperate breath, shouted,
"Help me! The alien's dead! He kicked the Station apart—the methane's
coming in! Get help, do you hear me? Do you hear me?"
Silence. In the smothering blackness, he
remembered: She
can't understand me any more. Even if
she's alive.
He turned, making an animal noise in his
throat. He groped his way on around the room, past the second doorway. Behind
the walls, something was dripping with a slow cold tinkle and splash, a forlorn
night sound. Small, hard floating things rapped against his legs. Then he
touched a smooth curve of metal: the air lock.
Eagerly he pushed his feeble weight against
the door. It didn't move. And it didn't move. Cold air was rushing out around
the door frame, a thin knife-cold stream, but the door itself was jammed tight.
The suit! He should have thought of that
before. If he just had some pure air to breathe, and a little warmth in his
fingers . . . But the door of the suit locker would not move, either. The
ceiling must have buckled.
And that was the end, he thought, bewildered.
There were no more ways out. But there had to
be— He pounded on the door until his arms would not lift any more; it did not
move. Leaning against the chili metal, he saw a single light blink on overhead.
The room was a wild place of black shadows
and swimming shapes—the book leaves, fluttering and darting in the air stream.
Schools of them beat wildly at the walls, curling over, baffled, trying again;
others were swooping around the outer corridor, around and around: he could see
them whirling past the doorways, dreamlike, a white drift of silent paper in
the darkness.
The acrid smell was harsher
in his nostrils. Wesson choked, groping his way to the console again. He
pounded it with his open hand: he wanted to see Earth.
But when the little square
of brightness leaped up, it was /the dead body of the alien that Wesson saw.
It hung motionless in the cavity of the
Station, limbs dangling stiff and still, eyes dull. The last turn of the screw
had been too much for it: but Wesson had survived . . .
For a few minutes.
The dead alien face mocked him; a whisper of
memory floated into his mind: We might have been brothers. . . . All at once, Wesson passionately wanted to believe it—■ wanted to
give in, turn back. That passed. Wearily he let himself sag into the bitter now, thinking with thin defiance, It's done—hate wins. You'll have to stop this big giveaway —can't risk
this happening again. And we'll hate you for that—and when we get out to the
stars—
The world was swimming numbly away out of
reach. He felt the last fit of coughing take his body, as if it were happening
to someone else beside him.
The last fluttering leaves of paper came to
rest. There was a long silence in the drowned room.
Then:
"Paul," said the voice of the
mechanical woman brokenly; "Paul," it said again, with the
hopelessness of lost, unknown, impossible love.
SATELLITE PASSAGE
Theodore
L Thomas
Theodore l. Thomas is a patent attorney who started his writing career doing a weekly
science column for the Stamford, Conn., Advocate in
1949, branched out into articles for the science-fiction magazines in 1952 (as
"Leonard Lockhard", sometimes collaborating with another
lawyer-writer, Charles L. Harness). His first fiction appeared in 1953; he has
published about 70 stories in magazines, ranging from Planet Stories to Playboy; still
writes for the Advocate, and also does a science column for Fantasy & Science Fiction. He has written one novel. The Clone (1965) in
collaboration with Kate Wilhelm.
Born
in 1920, Thomas studied chemical engineering at M.I.T., then took a second
degree in law, with time out for the artillery, and for court-martial work in
Japan, during World War II. He now lives, with his' wife and three children, in
Lancaster, Pa., except when they are scuba-diving off their cabin cruiser in
Atlantic coastal waters.
"Satellite
Passage" was reprinted from If (Dec,
1958) in the 4th SF Annual. Thomas' story, "The Far look", also appeared
in the 2nd Annual, and "The Lagging Profession", by
"Lockhard", in the 6th.
The three men bent over the chart and once again computed
the orbit. It was quiet in the satellite, a busy quiet broken by the click of
seeking microswitches and the gentle purr of smooth-running motors. The deep
pulsing throb of the air conditioner had stopped; the satellite was in the
Earth's shadow and there was no need for cooling the interior.
"Well,"
said Morgan, "it checks. We'll pass within fifty feet of the other satellite.
Too close. Think we ought to move?"
Kaufman
looked at him and did not speak. McNary glanced up and snorted. Morgan nodded.
He said, "That's
right. If there's any moving to be done, let
them do it." He felt a curious nascent emotion, a blend of anger and
exhilaration—very faint now, just strong enough to be recognizable. The
pencil snapped in his fingers, and he stared at it, and smiled.
Kaufman
said, "Any way we can' reline this a little? Fifty feet cuts it kind of
close."
They
were silent, and the murmuring of machinery filled the cramped room.
"How's this?" said McNary. "Wait till we see the other
satellite, take a couple of readings on it, and compute the orbit again. We'd
have about five minutes to make the calculations. Morgan here can do it in less
than that. Then we'd know if we're on a collision course."
Morgan
nodded. "We could do it that way." He studied the chart in front of
him. "The only thing, those boys on the other satellite will see what
we're doing. They'll know we're afraid of a collision. They'll radio it down to
Earth, and—you know the Russian mind—we'll lose face."
"That so bad?"
asked Kaufman.
Morgan
stared at the chart. He answered softly. "Yes, I think it is. The Russians
will milk it dry if we make any move to get our satellite out of the way of
theirs. We can't do that to our people."
McNary
nodded. Kaufman said, "Agree. Just wanted to throw it out. We stay put. We
hit, we hit."
The
other two looked at Kaufman. The abrupt dismissal of a serious problem was
characteristic of the little astronomer; Kaufman wasted no time with second
guesses. A decision made was a fact accomplished; it was over.
Morgan
glanced at McNary to see how he was taking it. McNary, now, big as he was, was
a worrier. He stood ready to change his mind at any time, whenever some new
alternative looked belter. Only the soundness of his judgment prevented his
being putty in any strong hands. He was a meteorologist, and a good one.
"You
know," McNary said, "I still can't quite believe it. Two satellites,
one pole-to-pole, the other equatorial, both having apogees and perigees of
different elevations—yet they wind up on what amounts to a collision
course."
Morgan
said, "That's what regression will do for you. But we haven't got any time
for that; we've got to think this out. Let's see, they'll be coming up from
below us at passage. Can we make anything of that?"
There
was silence while the three men considered it. Morgan's mind was focused on
the thing that was about to happen; but wisps of memory intruded. Faintly he
could hear the waves, smell the bite in the salt sea air. A man who had sailed
a thirty-two-foot ketch alone into every corner of the globe never thereafter
quite lost the sound of the sea in his ear. And the struggle, the duel, the
strain of outguessing the implacable elements, there was a test of a man....
"Better
be outside in any case," said Kaufman. "Suited up and outside.
They'll see us, and know we intend to do nothing to avoid collision. Also,
we'll be in a better position to cope with anything that comes along, if we're
in the suits."
Morgan
and McNary nodded, and again there was talk. They discussed the desirability of
radio communication with the other satellite, and decided against it. To keep
their own conversations private, they agreed to use telephone communication
instead of radio. When the discussion trailed off, Kaufman said, "Be some
picture, if we have the course computed right. We stand there and wave at 'em
as they go by."
Morgan
tried to see it in his mind: three men standing on a long, slim tube, and
waving at three men on another. The first rocket passage, and me waving. And
then Morgan remembered something, and the image changed.
He
saw the flimsy, awkward planes sputtering past each other on the morning's
mission. The pilots, detached observers, noncombatants really, waved at each
other as the rickety planes passed. Kindred souls they were, high above the
walks of normal men. So they waved ...
for a while.
Morgan said, "Do you
suppose they'll try anything?"
"Like what?" said
Kaufman.
"Like
knocking us out of orbit if they can. Like shooting at us if they have a gun.
Like throwing something at us, if they've got nothing better to do."
"My
God," said McNary, "you think they might have brought a gun up
here?"
Morgan
began examining the interor of the tiny cabin. Slowly he turned his head,
looking at one piece of equipment after another, visualizing what was packed
away under it and behind it. To the right of the radio was the space-suit
locker, and his glance lingered there. He reached over, opened the door and
slipped a hand under the suits packed in the locker. For a moment he fumbled
and then he sat back holding an oxygen flask in his hand. He hefted the small
steel flask and looked at Kaufman. "Can you think of anything better than
this for throwing?"
Kaufman
took it and hefted it in his turn, and passed it to McNary. McNary did the same
and then carefully held it in front of him and took his hand away. The flask
remained poised in mid-air, motionless. Kaufman shook his head and said,
"I can't think of anything better. It's got good mass, fits the hand well.
It'll do."
Morgan
said, "Another thing. We clip extra flasks to our belts and they look like
part of the standard equipment. It won't be obvious that we're carrying
something we can throw."
McNary gently pushed the flask toward Morgan,
who caught it and replaced it. McNary said, "I used to throw a hot pass at
Berkeley. I wonder how the old arm is."
The
discussion went on. At'one point the radio came to life and Kaufman had a
lengthy conversation with one of the control points on the surface of the
planet below. They talked in code. It was agreed that the American satellite
should not move to make room for the other, and this information was carefully
leaked so the Russians would be aware of the decision.
The
only difficulty was that the Russians also leaked the information that their
satellite would not move, either.
A
final check of the two orbits revealed no change. Kaufman switched off the
set.
"That," he said,
"is the whole of it."
"They're
leaving us pretty much on our own," said McNary.
"Couldn't
be any other way," Morgan answered. "We're the ones at the scene.
Besides"—he smiled his tight smile— "they trust us."
Kaufman
snorted. "Ought to. They went to enough trouble to pick us."
McNary
looked at the chronometer and said, "Three quarters of an hour to passage.
We'd better suit up."
Morgan nodded and reached again into the suit
locker. The top suit was McNary's, and as he worked his way into it, Morgan and
Kaufman pressed against the walls to give him room. Kaufman was next, and then
Morgan. They set out the helmets, and while Kaufman and McNary made a final
check of the equipment, Morgan took several sights to verify their position.
"Luck,"
said Kaufman, and dropped his helmet over his head. The others followed and
they all went through the air-sealing check-off. They passed the telephone wire
around, and tested the circuit. Morgan handed out extra oxygen flasks, three
for each. Kaufman waved, squeezed into the air lock and pulled the hatch closed
behind him. McNary went next, then Morgan.
Morgan
carefully pulled himself erect alongside the outer hatch and plugged the
telephone jack into his helmet. As he straightened, he saw the Earth directly
in front of him. It loomed large, visible as a great mass of blackness cutting
off the harsh white starshine. The blackness was smudged with irregular patches
of orangish light that marked the cities of Earth.
Morgan became aware that McNary, beside him,
was pointing toward the center of the Earth. Following the line of his finger
Morgan could see a slight flicker of light against the blackness; it was so
faint that he had to look above it to see it.
"Storm,"
said McNary. "Just below the equator. It must be a pip if we can see the
lightning through the clouds from here. I've been watching it develop for the
last two days."
Morgan stared, and nodded to himself. He knew
what it was like down there. The familiar feeling was building up, stronger now
as the time to passage drew closer. First the waiting. The sea, restless in
expectancy as the waves tossed their hoary manes. The gathering majesty of the
elements, reaching, searching, striving. . . . And if at the height of the
contest the screaming wind snatched up and smothered a defiant roar from a
mortal throat, there was none to tell of it.
Then
the time came when the forces waned. A slight letup at first, then another.
Soon the toothed and jagged edge
of
the waves subsided, the hard side-driven spray and rain assumed a more normal
direction.
The
man looked after the departing storm, and there was pain in his eyes, longing.
Almost, the words rose to his lips, "Come back, I am still here, do not
leave me, come back." But the silent supplication went unanswered, and the
man was left with a taste of glory gone, with an emptiness that drained the
soul. The encounter had ended, the man had won. But the winning was bitter. The
hard fight was not hard enough. Somewhere there must be a test sufficient to
try the mettle of this man. Somewhere there was a crucible hot enough to float
any dross. But where? The man searched and searched, but could not find it.
Morgan
turned his head away from the storm and saw that Kaufman and McNary had walked
to the top of the satellite. Carefully he turned his body and began placing one
foot in front of the other to join them. Yes, he thought, men must always be on
top, even if the top is only a state of mind. Here on the outer surface of the
satellite, clinging to the metallic skin with shoes of magnetized alloy, there
was no top. One direction was the same as another, as with a fly walking on a
chandelier. Yet some primordial impulse drove a man to that position which he
considered the top, drove him to stand with his feet pointed toward the Earth
and his head toward the outer reaches where the stars moved.
Walking
under these conditions was difficult, so Morgan moved with care. The feet could
easily tread ahead of the man without his knowing it, or they could lag behind.
A slight unthinking motion could detach the shoes from the satellite, leaving
the man floating free, unable to return. So Morgan moved with care, keeping the
telephone line clear with one hand.
When he reached the others, Morgan stopped
and looked around. The sight always gave him pause. It was not pretty; rather,
it was harsh and garish like the raucous illumination of a honkytonk saloon.
The black was too black, and the stars burned too white. Everything appeared
sharp and hard, with none of the softness seen from the Earth.
Morgan
stared, and his lips curled back over his teeth. The anticipation inside him
grew greater. No sound and fury here; the menace was of a different sort.
Looming, quietly foreboding, it was everywhere.
Morgan
leaned back to look overhead, and his lips curled further. This was where it
might come, this was the place. Raw space, where a man moved and breathed in
momentary peril, where cosmic debris formed arrow-swift reefs on which to
founder, where star-born particles traveled at unthinkable speeds out of the
macrocosm seeking some fragile microcosm to shatter.
"Sun."
Kaufman's voice echoed tinnily inside the helmet. Morgan brought his head
down. There, ahead, a tinge of deep red edged a narrow segment of the black
Earth. The red brightened rapidly, and broadened. Morgan reached to one side of
his helmet and dropped a filter into place; he continued to stare at the sun.
McNary said, "Ten
minutes to passage."
Morgan
unhooked one of the oxygen cylinders at his belt and said, "We need some
practice. We'd better try throwing one of these now; not much time left."
He turned sideways and made several throwing motions with his right hand
without releasing the cylinder. "Better lean into it more than you would
down below. Well, here goes." He pushed the telephone line clear of his
right side and leaned back, raising his right arm. He began to lean forward.
When it seemed that he must topple, he snapped his arm down and threw the
cylinder. The recoil straightened him neatly, and he stood securely upright.
The cylinder shot out and down in a straight line and was quickly lost to sight.
"Very
nice," said McNary. "Good timing. I'll keep mine low too. No sense
cluttering the orbits up here with any more junk." Carefully McNary leaned
back, leaned forward, and threw. The second cylinder followed the first, and
McNary kept his footing.
Without
speaking Kaufman went through the preliminaries and launched his cylinder.
Morgan and McNary watched it speed into the distance. "Shooting stars on
Earth tonight," said McNary.
"Quick! I'm off."
It was Kaufman.
Morgan
and McNary turned to see Kaufman floating several feet above the satellite, and
slowly receding. Morgan stepped toward him and scooped up the telephone wire
that ran to Kaufman's helmet. Kaufman swung an arm in a circle so that it
became entangled in the wire. Morgan carefully drew the wire taut and checked
Kaufman's outward motion. Gently, so as not to snap the wire, he slowly reeled
him in. McNary grasped Kaufman's shoulders and turned him so that his feet
touched the metal shell of the satellite.
McNary
chuckled and said, "Why didn't you ride an oxygen cylinder down?"
Kaufman
grunted and said, "Oh, sure. I'll leave that to the idiots in the movies;
that's the only place a man can ride a cylinder in space." He turned to
Morgan. "Thanks. Do as much for you some day."
"Hope
you don't have to," Morgan answered. "Look, any throwing to be done,
you better leave it to Mac and me. We can't be fishing anyone back if things
get hot."
"Right,"
said Kaufman, "I'll do what I can to fend off anything they throw at
us." He sniffed. "Be simpler if we have a collision."
Morgan
was staring to the left. He lifted a hand and pointed. "That it?"
The
others squinted in that direction. After a moment they saw the spot of light
moving swiftly up and across the black backdrop of the naked sky. "Must
be," said Kaufman. "Right time, right place. Must be."
Morgan
proudly turned his back on the sun and closed his eyes; he would need his best
vision shortly now, and he wanted his pupils dilated as much as possible.
"Make anything out yet?" he said.
"No. Little brighter."
Morgan
stood without moving. He could feel the heat on his back as his suit seized the
radiant energy from the sun and converted it to heat. He grew warm at the back,
yet his front remained cold. The sensation was familiar, and Morgan sought to place
it. Yes, that was it—a fireplace. He felt as does a man who stands in a cold
room with his back toward a roaring fire. One side toasted, the other side
frigid. Funny, the homey sensations, even here.
"Damn
face plate." It was Kaufman. He had scraped the front of his helmet
against the outside hatch a week ago. Since then the scratches distracted him
every time he wore the helmet.
Morgan waited, and the exultation seethed and
bubbled and fumed. "Anything?" he said.
"It's
brighter," said McNary. "But—wait a minute, I can make it out.
They're outside, the three of them. I can just see them."
It
was time. Morgan turned to face the approaching satellite. He raised a hand to
shield his face plate from the sun and carefully opened his eyes. He shifted
his hand into the proper position and studied the other satellite.
It
was like their own, even to the three men standing on it, except that the three
were spaced farther apart.
"Any sign of a rifle
or gun?" asked McNary.
"Not
that I see," said Morgan. "They're not close enough to tell."
He
watched the other satellite grow larger and he tried to judge its course, but
it was too far away. Although his eyes were on the satellite, his side vision
noted the bright-lit Earth below and the stars beyond. A small part of his mind
was amused by his own stubborn egocentricity. Knowing well that he was moving
and moving fast, he still felt that he stood motionless while the rest of the
universe revolved around him. The great globe seemed to be majestically turning
under his rooted feet. The harsh brilliances that were the stars seemed to
sweep by overhead. And that oncoming satellite, it seemed not to move so much
as merely swell in size as he watched.
One of the tiny figures on the other satellite
shifted its position toward the others. Sensitive to the smallest detail,
Morgan said, "He didn't clear a line when he walked. No telephone. They're
on radio. See if we can find the frequency. Mac, take the low. Shorty, the
medium. I'll take the high."
Morgan reached to his helmet and began
turning the channel selector, hunting for the frequency the Russians were
using. Kaufman found it. He said, "Got it, I think. One twenty-eight point
nine."
Morgan set his selector, heard nothing at
first. Then hard in his ear burst an unintelligible sentence with the characteristic
fruity diphthongs of Russian. "I think that's it," he said.
He watched, and the satellite increased in size. "No rifle or any
other weapon that I see," said Morgan. "But they are carrying a lot of extra oxygen bottles."
Kaufman
grunted. McNary asked, "Can you tell if it's a collision course yet? I
can't."
Morgan stared at the satellite through
narrowed eyes, frowning in concentration. "I think not. I think it'll
cross our bow twenty or thirty feet out; close but no collision."
McNary's
breath sounded loud in the helmet. "Good. Then we've nothing but the men
to worry about. I wonder how those boys pitch."
Another
burst of Russian came over the radio, and with it Morgan felt himself slip into
the relaxed state he knew so well. No longer was the anticipation rising. He
was ready now, in a state of calm, a deadly and efficient calm—ready for the
test. This was how it always was with him when the time came, and the time was
now.
Morgan
watched as the other satellite approached. His feet were apart and his head
turned sideways over his left shoulder. At a thousand yards, he heard a mutter
in Russian and saw the man at the stern start moving rapidly toward the bow.
His steps were long. Too long.
Morgan
saw the gap appear between the man and the surface of the other ship, saw the
legs kicking in a futile attempt to establish contact again. The radio was
alive with quick, short sentences, and the two men turned and began to work
their way swiftly toward the bit of human jetsam that floated near them.
"I'll be damned,"
said Kaufman. "They'll never make it."
Morgan
had seen that this was true. The gap between floating man and ship widened
faster than the gap between men and floating man diminished. Without conscious
thought or plan, Morgan leaned forward and pulled the jack on the telephone
line from McNary's helmet. He leaned back and did the same to Kaufman,
straightened and removed his own. He threw a quick knot and gathered the line,
forming a coil in his left hand and one in his right, and leaving a large loop
floating near the ship in front of him. He stepped forward to clear Kaufman,
and twisted his body far around to the right. There he waited, eyes fixed on
the other satellite. He crouched slightly and began to lean forward, far
forward. At the proper moment he snapped both his arms around to throw the
line, the left hand throwing
high, the right low. All his sailor's skill
went into that heave. As the other satellite swept past, the line flew true to
meet it. The floating man saw it coming and grabbed it and wrapped it around his
hand and shouted into the radio. The call was not needed; the lower portion of
the line struck one of the walking men. He turned and pulled the line into his
arms and hauled it tight. The satellite was barely past when the bit of human
jetsam was returning to its metallic haven. The two men became three again, and
they turned to face the American satellite. As one man the three raised both
arms and waved. Still without thinking, Morgan found himself raising an arm
with Kaufman and McNary and waving back.
He
dropped his arm and watched the satellite shrink in size. The calmness left
him, replaced by a small spot of emptiness that grew inside him, and grew and
swelled and threatened to engulf him.
Passage
was ended, but the taste in his mouth was of ashes and not of glory.
NO, NO,
NOT ROGOV!
Cordwainer Smith
Paul M. A. Linebarger ("Cordwainer Smith") (1913-1966)
was Professor of Asiatic Politics at the Johns Hopkins School of Advanced
International Studies. At the time of his death, he and his wife. Dr. Genevieve
Linebarger (a political scientist specializing in Southeast Asia), had recently
completed a book. Confrontation and World Peace, based on a tour of Asia and the Pacific in 1964-65.
Dr.
Linebarger was born in Milwaukee, but just barely: "Father wanted a boy
who could be President, so I had to be born in America." He grew up in Chinai "father," a former U.S. Judge in the Philippines, was legal
adviser to Sun Yal-sen. (Years later. Dr. Linebarger's business cards bore his
name in Chinese characters, and at least two pen names, "Felix C.
Forrest" and "Cordwainer Smith," were derived from the literal
translation of the name, Lin Po-lo: Forest of Incandescent Bliss.)
The
first "Smith" story, "Scanners Live in Vain", appeared in a
semiprofessional magazine. Fantasy Book, in 1950, and was immediately reprinted in
Heinlein's classic anthology. Tomorrow the Stars. His first book. You Will Never Be the Same, was published in 1962. The last was Quest of Three Worlds (Ace, 1966).
"No,
No, Not Rogovl" was first published in If, February, 1959, and reprinted in the 5lh
Annual. "A Planet Named Shayol" also appeared in the 7th Annual, and
"Drunkboal" in the 9th.
That
gold shape on the golden steps shook and fluttered like a bird gone mad—like a
bird imbued with an intellect and a soul, and, nevertheless, driven mad by
ecstasies and terrors beyond human understanding. A thousand worlds watched.
Had the ancient calendar continued, this would have been A.D. 13,582,
After defeat, after disappointment, after
ruin and reconstruction, mankind had leaped
among the stars.
Out of the shock of meeting inhuman art, of
confronting nonhuman dances, mankind had made a superb esthetic effort and had
leaped upon the stage of all the
worlds.
The
golden steps reeled. Some eyes that watched had retinas. Some had crystalline
cones. Yet all eyes were fixed upon the golden shape which interpreted "The Glory and Affirmation of Man" in the Inter-World Dance Festival of what might have been A.D. 13,582.
Once
again mankind was winning the contest. Music and dance were hypnotic beyond the
limits of systems, compelling,
shocking to human and inhuman eyes. The dance was a triumph of shock—the shock of dynamic beauty.
The
golden shape on the golden steps executed shimmering intricacies of meaning. The body was gold and still
human. The body was a woman, but more than a woman. On the golden steps, in
golden light, she trembled and fluttered like a bird gone mad.
The ministry of State Security had been
positively shocked when they found that a Nazi agent, more heroic than prudent,
had almost reached N. Rogov.
Rogov
was worth more to the Soviet armed forces than any two air armies, more than
three motorized divisions. His brain was a weapon, a weapon for the Soviet
power.
Since the brain was a
weapon, Rogov was a prisoner.
He didn't mind.
Rogov
was a pure Russian type, broad-faced, sandy-haired, blue-eyed, with whimsy in
his smile and amusement in the wrinkles at the tops of his cheeks.
"Of
course I'm a prisoner," Rogov used to say. "I am a prisoner of State
service to the Soviet peoples. But the workers and peasants are good to me. I
am an academician of the All Union Academy of Sciences, a major general in the
Red Air Force, a professor in the University of Kharkov, a deputy works
manager of the Red Flag Combat Aircraft Production Trust. From each of these I
draw a salary."
Sometimes
he would narrow his eyes at his Russian scientific colleagues and ask them in
dead earnest, "Would I serve capitalists?"
The affrighted colleagues would try to
stammer their way out of the embarrassment, protesting their common loyalty to
Stalin or Beria, or Zhukov, or Molotov, or Bul-ganin, as the case may have
been.
Rogov
would look very Russian: calm, mocking, amused. He would let them stammer.
Then he'd laugh.
Solemnity
transformed into hilarity, he would explode into bubbling, effervescent,
good-humored laughter: "Of course I could not serve the capitalists. My
little Anastasia would not let me."
The
colleagues would smile uncomfortably and would wish that Rogov did not talk so
wildly, or so comically, or so freely.
Rogov
was afraid of nothing. Most of his colleagues were afraid of each other, of the
Soviet system, of the world, of life, and of death.
Perhaps
Rogov had once been ordinary and mortal like other people, and full of fears.
But
he had become the lover, the colleague, the husband of Anastasia Fyodorovna
Cherpas.
Comrade
Cherpas had been his rival, his antagonist, his competitor, in the struggle for
scientific eminence in the frontiers of Russian science. Russian science could
never overtake the inhuman perfection of German method, the rigid intellectual
and moral discipline of German teamwork, but the Russians could and did get
ahead of the Germans by giving vent to their bold, fantastic imaginations.
Rogov had pioneered the first rocket launchers of 1939. Cherpas had finished
the job by making the best of the rockets radio-directed.
Rogov
in 1942 had developed a whole new system of photo-mapping. Comrade Cherpas had
applied it to color film. Rogov, sandy-haired, blue-eyed, and smiling, had recorded
his criticisms of Comrade Cherpas's naïveté
and theoretical unsoundness
at the top-secret meetings of Russian scientists during the black winter
nights of 1943. Comrade Cherpas, her butter-yellow hair flowing down like
living water to her shoulders, her unpainted face gleaming with fanaticism,
intelligence, and dedication, would snarl her own defiance at him,
deriding his Communist theory, pinching at his pride, hitting his hypotheses
where they were weakest.
By 1944 a Rogov-Cherpas quarrel had become
something worth traveling to see. In 1945 they were married.
Their
courtship was secret, their wedding a surprise, their partnership a miracle in
the upper ranks of Russian science.
The emigre press had reported that the great scientist,
Peter Kapitza, once remarked, "Rogov and Cherpas, there is a team. They're
Communists, good Communists; but they're better than that! They're Russian, Russian enough to beat the world. Look at
them. That's the future, our Russian future!" Perhaps the quotation was an
exaggeration, but it did show the enormous respect in which both Rogov and
Cherpas were held by their colleagues in Soviet science.
Shortly
after their marriage strange things happened to them.
Rogov remained happy. Cherpas was radiant.
Nevertheless,
the two of them began to have haunted expressions, as though they had seen
things which words could not express, as though they had stumbled upon secrets
too important to be whispered even to the most secure agents of the Soviet
State Police.
In
1947 Rogov had an interview with Stalin. As he left Stalin's office in the
Kremlin, the great leader himself came to the door, his forehead wrinkled in
thought, nodding, "Da,
da, da."
Even
his own personal staff did not know why Stalin was saying "Yes, yes,
yes," but they did see the orders that went forth marked ONLY BY SAFE
HAND, and TO BE READ AND RETURNED, NOT RETAINED, and furthermore stamped FOR
AUTHORIZED EYES ONLY AND UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCES TO BE COPIED.
Into
the true and secret Soviet budget that year by the direct personal orders of a
noncommittal Stalin, an item was added for "Project Telescope."
Stalin tolerated no inquiry, brooked no comment.
A village which had had a name became
nameless.
A
forest which had been opened to the workers and peasants became military
territory.
Into the central post office in Kharkov there
went a new box number for the village of Ya. Ch.
Rogov
and Cherpas, comrades and lovers, scientists both and Russians both, disappeared
from the everyday lives of their colleagues. Their faces were no longer seen at
scientific meetings. Only rarely did they emerge.
On
the few occasions they were seen, usually going to and from Moscow at the time
the All Union budget was made up each year, they seemed smiling and happy. But
they did not make jokes.
What
the outside world did not know was that Stalin in giving them their own
project, granting them a paradise restricted to themselves, had seen to it that
a snake went with them in the paradise. The snake this time was not one, but
two personalities—Gausgofer and Gauck.
Stalin died.
Beria died too—less willingly. The world went
on.
Everything
went into the forgotten village of Ya. Ch. and nothing came out.
It
was rumored that Khrushchev himself visited Rogov and Cherpas. It was even
whispered that Khrushchev said as he went to the Kharkov airport to fly back to
Moscow, "It's big, big, big. There'll be no cold war if they do it. There
won't be any war of any kind. We'll finish capitalism before the capitalists
can ever begin to fight. If they do it. If they do it." Khrushchev was
reported to have shaken his head slowly in perplexity and to have said nothing
more but to have put his initials on the unmodified budget of Project Telescope
when a trusted messenger next brought him an envelope from Rogov.
Anastasia
Cherpas became a mother. Their first boy looked like the father. He was
followed by a little girl. Then another little boy. The children didn't stop
Cherpas's work. The family had a large dacha and
trained nursemaids took over the household.
Every night the four of
them dined together.
Rogov, Russian, humorous,
courageous, amused.
Cherpas,
older, more mature, more beautiful than ever, but just as biting, just as
cheerful, just as sharp as she had ever been.
But then the other two, two who sat with them
across the years of all their days, the two colleagues who had been visited
upon them by the all-powerful word of Stalin himself.
Gausgofer
was a female: bloodless, narrow-faced, with a voice like a horse's whinny. She
was a scientist and a policewoman, and competent at both jobs. In 1920 she had
reported her own mother's whereabouts to the Bolshevik Terror Committee. In
1924 she had commanded her father's execution. He was a Russian German of the
old Baltic nobility and he had tried to adjust his mind to the new system, but
he had failed. In 1930 she had let her lover trust her a little too much. He
was a Rumanian Communist, very high in the Party, but he had a sneaking
sympathy for Trotsky. When he whispered into her ear in the privacy of their
bedroom, whispered with the tears pouring down his face, she had listened
affectionately and quietly and had delivered his words to the police the next
morning.
With that she came to
Stalin's attention.
Stalin
had been tough. He addressed her brutally, "Comrade, you have some
brains. I can see you know what Communism is all about. You understand
loyalty. You're going to get ahead and serve the Party and the working class,
but is that all you want?" He had spat the question at her.
She was so astonished that
she gaped.
The
old man had changed his expression, favoring her with leering benevolence. He
had put his forefinger on her chest, "Study science, Comrade. Study
science. Communism plus science equals victory. You're too clever to stay in
police work."
Gausgofer
fell in love with Rogov the moment she saw him.
Gausgofer
fell in hate—and hate can be as spontaneous and miraculous as love—with Cherpas
the moment she saw her.
But Stalin had guessed that too.
With
the bloodless, fanatic Gausgofer he had sent a man named B. Gauck.
Gauck
was solid, impassive, blank-faced. In body he was about the same height as
Rogov. Where Rogov was muscular, Gauck was flabby. Where Rogov's skin was fair
and shot through with the pink and health of exercise, Gauck's skin was like
stale lard, greasy, gray-green, sickly even on the best of days.
Gauck's
eyes were black and small. His glance was as cold and sharp as death. Gauck had
no friends, no enemies, no beliefs, no enthusiasms.
Gauck
never drank, never went out, never received mail, never sent mail, never spoke
a spontaneous word. He was rude, never kind, never friendly, never really
withdrawn: He couldn't withdraw any more than the constant withdrawal of all
his life.
Rogov
had turned to his wife in the secrecy of their bedroom soon after Gausgofer
and Gauck came and had said, "Anastasia, is that man sane?"
Cherpas
intertwined the fingers of her beautiful, expressive hands. She who had been
the wit of a thousand scientific meetings was now at a loss for words. She
looked up at her husband with a troubled expression. "I don't know,
comrade ... I just don't know."
Rogov
smiled his amused Slavic smile. "At the least then I don't think Gausgofer
knows either."
Cherpas
snorted with laughter, and picked up her hairbrush. "That she doesn't.
She really doesn't know, does she? I'll wager she doesn't even know to whom he
reports."
That conversation had reached into the past.
Gauck, Gausgofer, bloodless eyes and the black eyes—they remained.
Every dinner the four sat down together.
Every morning the four met
in the laboratory.
Rogov's great courage, high sanity, and keen
humor kept the work going.
Cherpas's flashing genius fueled him whenever
the routine overloaded his magnificent intellect.
Gausgofer
spied and watched and smiled her bloodless smiles; sometimes, curiously enough,
Gausgofer made genuinely constructive suggestions. She never understood the
whole frame of reference of their work, but she knew enough of the mechanical
and engineering details to be very useful on occasion.
Gauck
came in, sat down quietly, said nothing, did nothing. He did not even smoke.
He never fidgeted. He never went to sleep. He just watched.
The laboratory grew and with it there grew
the immense configuration of the espionage machine.
In
theory what Rogov had proposed and Cherpas seconded was imaginable. It
consisted of an attempt to work out an integrated theory for all the electrical
and radiation phenomena accompanying consciousness, and to duplicate the
electrical functions of mind without the use of animal material.
The range of potential
products was immense.
The
first product Stalin had asked for was a receiver, if possible, one capable of
tuning in the thoughts of a human mind and of translating those thoughts either
into a punch tape machine, an adapted German Hellschreiber machine, or phonetic
speech. If the grids could be turned around, the brain-equivalent machine as a
transmitter might be able to send out stunning forces which would paralyze or
kill the process of thought.
At
its best, Rogov's machine was designed to confuse human thought over great
distances, to select human targets to be confused, and to maintain an
electronic jamming system which would jam straight into the human mind without
the requirements of tubes or receivers.
He
had succeeded—in part. He had given himself a violent headache in the first
year of work.
In
the third year he had killed mice at a distance of ten kilometers. In the
seventh year he had brought on mass hallucinations and a wave of suicides in a
neighboring village. It was this which impressed Khrushchev.
Rogov
was now working on the receiver end. No one had ever explored the infinitely
narrow, infinitely subtle bands of radiation which distinguished one human mind
from another, but Rogov was trying, as it were, to tune in on minds far away.
He
had tried to develop a telepathic helmet of some kind, but it did not work. He
had then turned away from the reception of pure thought to the reception of
visual and auditory images. Where the nerve-ends reached the brain itself, he
had managed over the years to distinguish whole packets of microphenomena, and
on some of these he had managed to get a fix.
With
infinitely delicate tuning he had succeeded one day in picking up the eyesight
of their second chauffeur, and had managed, thanks to a needle thrust in just
below his own right eyelid, to "see" through the other man's eyes as
the other man, all unaware, washed their Zis limousine sixteen hundred meters
away.
Cherpas
had surpassed his feat later that winter, and had managed to bring in an entire
family having dinner over in a near-by city. She had invited B. Gauck to have a
needle inserted into his cheekbone so that he could see with the eyes of an
unsuspecting spied-on stranger. Gauck had refused any kind of needles, but
Gausgofer had joined in the experiment and had expressed her satisfaction with
the work.
The espionage machine was
beginning to take form.
Two
more steps remained. The first step consisted of tuning in on some remote
target, such as the White House in Washington or the NATO Headquarters outside
Paris.
The
second problem consisted of finding a method of jamming those minds at a
distance, stunning them so that the subject personnel fell into tears,
confusion, or insanity.
Rogov
had tried, but he had never gotten more than thirty kilometers from the
nameless village of Ya. Ch.
One
November there had been seventy cases of hysteria, most of them ending in
suicide, down in the city of Kharkov several hundred kilometers away, but Rogov
was not sure that his own machine was doing it.
Comrade
Gausgofer dared to stroke his sleeve. Her white lips smiled and her watery eyes
grew happy as she said in her high, cruel voice, "You can do it, comrade. You can do it."
Cherpas looked on with
contempt. Gauck said nothing.
The
female agent Gausgofer saw Cherpas's eyes upon her, and for a moment an arc of
living hatred leaped between the two women.
The three of them went back to work on the
machine.
Gauck sat on his stool and watched them.
It was the year in which Eristratov died that
the machine made a breakthrough. Eristratov died after the Soviet and People's
democracies had tried to end the cold war with the Americans.
It
was May. Outside the laboratory the squirrels ran among the trees. The
leftovers from the night's rain dripped on the ground and kept the earth moist.
It was comfortable to leave a few windows open and to let the smell of the forest
into the workshop.
The
smell of their oil-burning heaters, the stale smell of insulation, of ozone,
and of the heated electronic gear was something with which all of them were
much too familiar.
Rogov
had found that his eyesight was beginning to suffer because he had to get the
receiver needle somewhere near his optic nerve in order to obtain visual
impressions from the machine. After months of experimentation with both animal
and human subjects he had decided to copy one of their last experiments,
successfully performed on a prisoner boy fifteen years of age, by having the
needle slipped directly through the skull, up and behind the eye. Rogov had
disliked using prisoners, because Gauck, speaking on behalf of security,
always insisted that a prisoner used in experiments be destroyed in not less
than five days from the beginning of the experiment. Rogov had satisfied
himself that the skull-and-needle technique was safe, but he was very tired of trying
to get frightened, unscientific people to carry the load of intense, scientific
attentiveness required by the machine.
Somewhat
ill-humored, he shouted at Gauck, "Have you ever known what this is all
about? You've been here years. Do you know what we're trying to do? Don't you
ever want to take part in the experiments yourself? Do you realize how many
years of mathematics have gone into the making of these grids and the
calculation of these wave patterns? Are you good for anything?"
Gauck
had said, tonelessly and without anger, "Comrade professor, I am obeying
orders. You are obeying orders too. I've never impeded you."
Rogov
raved, "I know you never got in my way. We're all good servants of the
Soviet State. It's not a question of loyalty. It's a question of enthusiasm.
Don't you ever want to glimpse the science we're making? We are a hundred years
or a thousand years ahead of the capitalist Americans. Doesn't that excite you?
Aren't you a human being? Why don't you take part? How will you understand me
when I explain it?"
Gauck
said nothing; he looked at Rogov with his beady eyes. His dirty-gray face did
not change expression. Cherpas said, "Go ahead, Nikolai. The comrade can
follow if he wants to."
Gausgofer
looked enviously at Cherpas. She seemed inclined to keep quiet, but then had
to speak. She said, "Do go ahead, comrade professor."
Said
.Rogov, "Kharosho,
I'll do what I can. The
machine is now ready to receive minds over immense distances." He wrinkled
his lip in amused scorn. "We may even spy into the brain of the chief
rascal himself and find out what Eisenhower is planning to do today against the
Soviet people. Wouldn't it be wonderful if our machine could stun him and leave
him sitting addled at his desk?"
Gauck commented,
"Don't try it. Not without orders."
Rogov
ignored the interruption and went on. "First I receive. I don't know what
I will get, who I will get, or where they will be. All I know is that this
machine will reach out across all the minds of men and beasts now living and it
will bring the eyes and ears of a single mind directly into mine. With the new
needle going directly into the brain it will be possible for me to get a very
sharp fixation of position. The trouble with that boy last week was that even
though we knew he was seeing something outside this room, he appeared to be
getting sounds in a foreign language and did not know enough English or German
to realize where or what the machine had taken him to see."
Cherpas
laughed. "I'm not worried. I saw then it was safe. You go first, my
husband. If our comrades don't mind—?"
Gauck nodded.
Gausgofer
lifted her bony hand breathlessly to her skinny throat and said, "Of
course, Comrade Rogov, of course. You did all the work. You must
be the first."
Rogov sat down.
A white-smocked technician brought the
machine over to him. It was mounted on three rubber-tired wheels and it
resembled the small X-ray units used by dentists. In place of the cone at the
head of the X-ray machine there was a long, incredibly tough needle. It had
been made for them by the best surgical steel craftsmen in Prague.
Another
technician came up with a shaving bowl, a brush, and a straight razor. Under
the gaze of Gauck's deadly eyes he shaved an area of four square centimeters on
the top of Rogov's head.
Cherpas
herself then took over. She set her husband's head in the clamp and used a
micrometer to get the skull-fittings so tight and so accurate that the needle
would push through the dura mater at exactly the right point.
All
this work she did deftly with kind, very strong fingers. She was gentle, but
she was firm. She was his wife, but she was also his fellow scientist and his
colleague in the Soviet State.
She
stepped back and looked at her work. She gave him one of their own very special smiles, the secret gay smiles which they
usually exchanged with each other only when they were alone. "You won't
want to do this every day. We're going to have to find some way of getting into
the brain without using this needle. But it won't hurt you."
"Does
it matter if it does hurt?" said Rogov. "This is the triumph of all
our work. Bring
it down."
Cherpas,
her eyes gleaming with attention, reached over and pulled down the handle which
brought the tough needle to within a tenth of a millimeter of the right place.
Rogov
spoke very carefully: "All I felt was a little sting. You can turn the
power on now."
Gausgofer
could not contain herself. Timidly she addressed Cherpas, "May I turn on the power?"
Cherpas
nodded. Gauck watched. Rogov waited. Gausgofer pulled down the bayonet switch.
The power went on.
With
an impatient twist of her hand, Anastasia Cherpas ordered the laboratory
attendants to the other end of the room. Two or three of them had stopped
working and were staring at Rogov, staring like dull sheep. They looked
embarrassed and then they huddled in a white-smocked herd at the other end of
the laboratory.
The
wet May wind blew in on all of them. The scent of forest and leaves was about
them.
The three watched Rogov.
Rogov's
complexion began to change. His face became flushed. His breathing was so loud
and heavy they could hear it several meters away. Cherpas fell on her knees in
front of him, eyebrows lifted in mute inquiry.
Rogov did not dare nod, not with the needle
on his brain.
He
spoke through flushed lips, speaking thickly and heavily,
"Do—not—stop—now."
Rogov himself did not know what was
happening. He had thought he might see an American room, or a Russian room, or
a tropical colony. He might see palm trees, or forests, or desks. He might see
guns or buildings, washrooms or beds, hospitals, homes, churches. He might see
with the eyes of a child, a woman, a man, a soldier, a philosopher, a slave, a
worker, a savage, a religious, a Communist, a reactionary, a governor, a
policeman. He might hear voices; he might hear English, or French, or Russian,
Swahili, Hindi, Malay, Chinese, Ukrainian, Armenian, Turkish, Greek. He did not
know.
None of these things had
happened.
It
seemed to him that he had left the world, that he had left time. The hours and
the centuries shrank up like the meters, and the machine, unchecked, reached
out for the most powerful signal which any human mind had transmitted. Rogov
did not know it, but the machine had conquered time.
The machine had reached the dance, the human
challenger and the dance festival of the year that might have been A.D.
13,582.
Before Rogov's eyes the golden shape and the
golden steps shook and fluttered in a ritual a thousand times more compelling
than hypnotism. The rhythms meant nothing and everything to him. This was
Russia, this was Communism. This was his life—indeed it was his soul acted out
before his very eyes.
For
a second, the last second of his ordinary life, he looked through flesh and
blood eyes and saw the shabby woman whom he had once thought beautiful. He saw
Anas-tasia Cherpas, and he did not care.
His
vision concentrated once again on the dancing image, this woman, those
postures, that dance!
Then
the sound came in—music that would have made a Tschaikovsky weep, orchestras
which would have silenced Shostakovich or Khachaturian forever.
The
people-who-were-not-people between the stars had taught mankind many arts.
Rogov's mind was the best of its time, but his time was far, far behind the
time of the great dance. With that one vision Rogov went firmly and completely
mad.
He
became blind to the sight of Cherpas, Gausgofer, and Gauck. He forgot the
village of Ya. Ch. He forgot himself. He was like a fish, bred in stale fresh
water, which is thrown for the first time into a living stream. He was like an
insect emerging from the chrysalis. His twentieth-century mind could not hold
the imagery and the impact of the music and the dance.
But
the needle was there and the needle transmitted into his mind more than his
mind could stand.
The
synapses of his brain flicked like switches. The future flooded into him.
He fainted.
Cherpas
leaped forward and lifted the needle. Rogov fell out of the chair.
It was Gauck who got the doctors. By
nightfall they had Rogov resting comfortably and under heavy sedation. There
were two doctors, both from the military headquarters. Gauck had obtained
authorization for their services by a direct telephone call to Moscow.
Both
the doctors were annoyed. The senior one never stopped grumbling at Cherpas.
"You
should not have done it, Comrade Cherpas. Comrade Rogov should not have done
it either. You can't go around sticking things into brains. That's a medical
problem. None of you people are doctors of medicine. It's all right for you to
contrive devices with the prisoners, but you can't inflict things like this on
Soviet scientific personnel. I'm going to get blamed because I can't bring
Rogov back. You heard what he was saying. All he did was mutter, 'That golden
shape on the golden steps, that music, that me is a true me, that golden shape,
that golden shape, I want to be with that golden shape,' and rubbish like that.
Maybe you've ruined a first-class brain forever—" He stopped short as
though he had said too much. After all, the problem was a security problem and
apparently both Gauck and Gausgofer represented the security agencies.
Gausgofer
turned her watery eyes on the doctor and said in a low, even, unbelievably
poisonous voice, "Could she have
done it, comrade doctor?"
The doctor looked at Cherpas, answering
Gausgofer, "How? You were there. I wasn't. How could she have done it? Why should
she do it? You were there."
Cherpas
said nothing. Her lips were compressed tight with grief. Her yellow hair
gleamed, but her hair was all that remained, at that moment, of her beauty. She
was frightened and she was getting ready to be sad. She had no time to hate
foolish women or to worry about security; she was concerned with her colleague,
her lover, her husband Rogov.
There
was nothing much for them to do except to wait. They went into a large room and
waited.
The
servants had laid out immense dishes of cold sliced meat, pots of caviar, and
an assortment of sliced breads, pure butter, genuine coffee, and liquors.
None
of them ate much. At 9:15 the sound of rotors beat against the house. The big
helicopter had arrived from Moscow.
Higher authorities took
over.
The higher authority was - a deputy minister, a man named V. Karper.
Karper
was accompanied by two or three uniformed colonels, by an engineer civilian, by
a man from the headquarters of the Communist Party of the Soviet Union, and by
two doctors.
They
dispensed with the courtesies. Karper merely said, "You are Cherpas. I
have met you. You are Gausgofer. I have seen your reports. You are Gauck."
The
delegation went into Rogov's bedroom. Karper snapped, "Wake him."
The
military doctor who had given the sedatives said, "Comrade, you
mustn't—"
Karper
cut him off. "Shut up." He turned to his own physician, pointed at
Rogov. "Wake him up."
The
doctor from Moscow talked briefly with the senior military doctor. He too began
shaking his head. He gave Karper a disturbed look. Karper guessed what he might
hear. He said, "Go ahead. I know there is some danger to the patient, but
I've got to get back to Moscow with a report."
The two doctors worked over
Rogov. One of them gave
Rogov
an injection. Then all of them stood back from the bed.
Rogov
writhed in his bed. He squirmed. His eyes opened, but he did not see the
people. With childishly clear and simple words Rogov began to talk, ". . .
that golden shape, the golden stairs, the music, take me back to the music, I
want to be with the music, I really am the music . . ." and so on in an
endless monotone.
Cherpas
leaned over him so that her face was directly in his line of vision. "My
darling! My darling, wake up. This is serious."
It was evident to all of
them that Rogov did not hear her.
For
the first time in many years Gauck took the initiative. He spoke directly to
the man from Moscow. "Comrade, may I make a suggestion?"
Karper
looked at him. Gauck nodded at Gausgofer. "We were both sent here by
orders of Comrade Stalin. She is senior. She bears the responsibility. All I do
is double check."
The
deputy minister turned to Gausgofer. Gausgofer had been staring at Rogov on the
bed; her blue, watery eyes were tearless and her face was drawn into an
expression of extreme tension.
Karper
ignored that and said to her firmly, clearly, com-mandingly, "What do you
recommend?"
Gausgofer
looked at him very directly and said in a measured voice, "I do not think
that the case is one of brain damage. I believe that he has obtained a
communication which he must share with another human being and that unless one
of us follows him there may be no answer."
Karper barked, "Very
well. But what do we do?"
"Let me follow—into the machine."
Anastasia
Cherpas began to laugh slyly and frantically. She seized Karper's arm and
pointed her finger at Gausgofer. Karper stared at her.
Cherpas
restrained her laughter and shouted at Karper, "The woman's mad. She has
loved my husband for many years. She has hated my presence, and now she thinks
that she can save him. She thinks that she can follow. She thinks that he wants
to communicate with her. That's ridiculous. I will go myself!"
Karper looked about. He selected two of his
staff and stepped over into a corner of the room. They could hear him talking,
but they could not distinguish the words. After a conference of six or seven
minutes he returned.
"You
people have been making serious security charges against each other. I find
that one of our finest weapons, the mind of Rogov, is damaged. Rogov's not just
a man. He is a Soviet project." Scorn entered his voice. "I find that
the senior security officer, a policewoman with a notable record, is charged
by another Soviet scientist with a silly infatuation. I disregard such
charges. The development of the Soviet State and the work of Soviet science
cannot be impeded by personalities. Comrade Gausgofer will follow. I am acting
tonight because my own staff physician says that Rogov may not live and it is
very important for us to find out just what has happened to him and why."
He
turned his baleful gaze on Cherpas. "You will not protest, comrade. Your
mind is the property of the Russian State. Your life and your education have
been paid for by the workers. You cannot throw these things away because of
personal sentiment. If there is anything to be found, Comrade Gausgofer will
find it for both of us."
The
whole group of them went back into the laboratory. The frightened technicians
were brought over from the barracks. The lights were turned on and the windows
were closed. The May wind had become chilly.
The
needle was sterilized. The electronic grids were warmed up.
Gausgofer's
face was an impassive mask of triumph as she sat in the receiving chair. She
smiled at Gauck as an attendant brought the soap and the razor to shave clean
a patch on her scalp.
Gauck
did not smile back. His black eyes stared at her. He said nothing. He did
nothing. He watched.
Karper
walked to and fro, glancing from time to time at the hasty but orderly
preparation of the experiment.
Anastasia
Cherpas sat down at a laboratory table about five meters away from the group.
She watched the back of Gausgofer's head as the needle was lowered. She buried
her face in her hands. Some of the others thought they heard her weeping, but
no one heeded Cherpas very much. They were too intent on watching Gausgofer.
Gausgofer's face became red. Perspiration
poured down the flabby cheeks. Her fingers tightened on the arm of her chair.
Suddenly she shouted at them, "That golden shape on the golden steps."
She
leaped to her feet, dragging the apparatus with her.
No
one had expected this. The chair fell to the floor. The needle holder, lifted
from the floor, swung its weight sidewise. The needle twisted like a scythe in
Gausgofer's brain.
The
body of Gausgofer lay on the floor, surrounded by excited officials.
Karper
was acute enough to look around at Cherpas.
She
stood up from the laboratory table and walked toward him. A thin line of blood
flowed down from her cheekbone. Another line of blood dripped down from a
position on her cheek, one and a half centimeters forward of the opening of her
left ear.
With
tremendous composure, her face as white as fresh snow, she smiled at him.
"I eavesdropped."
Karper
said, "What?"
"I
eavesdropped, eavesdropped," repeated Anastasia Cherpas. "I found out
where my husband has gone. It is not somewhere in this world. It is something
hypnotic beyond all the limitations of our science. We have made a great gun,
but the gun has fired upon us before we could fire it.
"Project Telescope is finished. You may
try to get someone else to finish it, but you will not."
Karper
stared at her and then turned aside. Gauck stood in his way. "What do you
want?"
"To
tell you," said Gauck very softly, "to tell you, comrade deputy
minister, that Rogov is gone as she says he is gone, that she is finished if
she says she is finished, that all this is true. I know."
Karper
glared at him. "How do you know?"
Gauck
remained utterly impassive. With superhuman assurance and calm he said to
Karper, "Comrade, I do not dispute the matter. I know these people, though
I do not know their science. Rogov is done for."
At
last Karper believed him.
They
all looked at Anastasia Cherpas, at her beautiful
hair,
her determined blue eyes, and the two thin lines of blood.
Karper turned to her. "What do we do
now?"
For
an answer she dropped to her knees and began sobbing. "No, no, not Rogov!
No, no, not Rogov!"
And that was all that they
could get out of her. Gauck looked on.
On the golden steps in the golden light, a golden shape danced a dream beyond the limits of all imagination, danced and drew the music to herself until a
sigh of yearning, yearning which
became a hope and a torment, went through the hearts of living things on a thousand worlds.
Edges
of the golden scene faded raggedly
and unevenly into black. The golden dimmed down to a pale gold-silver sheen and
then to silver, last of all to white.
The dancer who had been golden was now a forlorn white-pink figure standing,
quiet and fatigued, on the immense white steps. The applause of a thousand worlds roared in upon her.
She
looked blindly at them. The dance had overwhelmed her, too. Their applause
could mean nothing. The dance was an end in itself. She would have to live,
somehow, until she danced again.
COMPOUNDED INTEREST
Mack Reynolds
Mack Reynolds burst, rather than broke, into print in 1950,
with almost 20 stories in the SF magazines alone. Shortly afterwards, he began
wandering through Europe, Asia, and Africa (with wife, van and typewriter) as
travel editor for Rogue, and his SF production fell to only six or seven
stories a year, on average, and even less when he began concentrating on longer
work. Since 1960, he has written one or two magazine novels a year, and adapted
probably (at least) as many again of his shorter pieces for publication by Ace
Books. His agent claims he is "the most prolific—by published wordage—contemporary
writer of science fiction," and possibly the claim can be upheld, now that
he has settled in Mexico, concentrating almost all his time on science fantasy.
His
latest book (as I write) is The Rival Rigelians (Ace,
1967), and he is reported to be at work on "a major book" to be
published "in connection with the 1968 Mexican Olympics."
Four
Reynolds stories have been reprinted in the SF Annuals: "Freedom" in
the 7th] "Earthlings, Go Home" in the 8th; "Pacifist" in
the 10th; and "Compounded Interest", which was published in Fantasy & Science Fiction, August, 1956, and in the 2nd Annual.
The stranger said
in miserable Italian,
"I wish to see Sior Marin Goldini on business."
The
concierge's manner was suspicious. Through the wicket he ran his eyes over the
newcomer's clothing. "On business, Sior?" He hesitated.
"Possibly, Sior, you could inform me as to the nature of your business, so
that I might inform his Zelenza's
secretary, Vico Letta . .
." He let his sentence dribble away.
The
stranger thought about that. "It pertains," he said finally, "to
gold." He brought a hand from his pocket and
opened it to disclose a half dozen yellow
coins.
"A
moment, Lustrissimo,"
the servant blurted
quickly. "Forgive me. Your costume, Lustrissimo . . ." He let his sentence dribble away again and was
gone.
A
few moments later he returned to swing the door open wide. "If you please,
Lustrissimo, his Zelenza awaits
you."
He
led the way down a vaulted hall to the central court, to the left past a
fountain well to a heavy outer staircase supported by Gothic arches and sided
by a carved parapet. They mounted, turned through a dark doorway and into a
poorly lit corridor. The servant stopped and drummed carefully on a thick
wooden door. A voice murmured from within and the servant held the door open
and then retreated.
Two men were at a rough-hewn oak table. The
older was heavy-set, tight of face and cold, and the other tall and thin and
ever at ease. The latter bowed gently. He gestured and said, "His Zelenza, the Sior Marin Goldini."
The
stranger attempted a clumsy bow in return, said awkwardly, "My name is . .
. Mister Smith."
There
was a moment of silence which Goldini broke finally by saying, "And this
is my secretary, Vico Letta. The servant mentioned gold, Sior, and
business."
The
stranger dug into a pocket, came forth with ten coins which he placed on the
table before him. Vico Letta picked one up in mild interest and examined it.
"I am not familiar with the coinage," he said.
His
master twisted his cold face without humor. "Which amazes me, my good Vico."
He turned to the newcomer. "And what is your wish with these coins, Sior
Mister Smith? I confess, this is confusing."
"I
want," Mister Smith said, "to have you invest the sum for me."
Vico
Letta had idly weighed one of the coins in question on a small scale. He cast
his eyes up briefly as he estimated. "The ten would come to approximately
forty-nine zecchini, Zelenza,"
he murmured.
Marin
Goldini said impatiently, "Sior, the amount is hardly sufficient for my
house to bother with. The bookkeeping alone—"
The
stranger broke in. "Don't misunderstand. I realize the sum is small.
However, I would ask but ten per cent, and would not call for an accounting for
... for one hundred years."
The
two Venetians raised puzzled eyebrows. "A hundred years, Sior? Perhaps
your command of our language . . ." Goldini said politely.
"One hundred
years," the stranger said.
"But
surely," the head of the house of Goldini protested, "it is unlikely
that any of we three will be alive. As God desires, possibly even the house of
Goldini will be a memory only."
Vico
Letta, intrigued, had been calculating rapidly. Now he said, "In one
hundred years, at ten per cent compounded annually, your gold would be worth better
than 700,000 zecchini."
"Quite a bit
more," the stranger said firmly.
"A
comfortable sum," Goldini nodded, beginning to feel some of the interest
of his secretary. "And during this period, all decisions pertaining to the
investment of the amount would be in the hands of my house?"
"Exactly."
The stranger took a sheet of paper from his pocket, tore it in two, and handed
one half to the Venetians. "When my half of this is presented to your
descendants, one hundred years from today, the bearer will be due the full
amount."
"Done,
Sior Mister Smith!" Goldini said. "An amazing transaction, but done.
Ten per cent in this day is small indeed to ask."
"It is enough. And now may I make some
suggestions? You are perhaps familiar with the Polo family?" Goldini scowled.
"I know Sior Maffeo Polo." "And his nephew, Marco?"
Goldini said cautiously, "I understand
young Marco was captured by the Genoese. Why do you ask?"
"He
is writing a book on his adventures in the Orient. It would be a well of
information for a merchant house interested in the East. Another thing. In a
few years there will be an attempt on the Venetian government and shortly
thereafter a Council of Ten will be formed which will eventually become the
supreme power of the republic. Support it from the first and make every effort
to have your house represented."
They stared at him and Marin Goldini crossed
himself unobtrusively.
The
stranger said, "If you find need for profitable investments beyond Venice
I suggest you consider the merchants of the Hanse cities and their soon to be
organized League."
They
continued to stare and he said, uncomfortably, "I'll go now. Your time is
valuable." He went to the door, opened it himself and left.
Marin Goldini snorted.
"That liar, Marco Polo."
Vico
said sourly, "How could he have known we were considering expanding our
activities into the East? We have discussed it only between ourselves."
"The
attempt on the government," Marin Goldini said, crossing himself again.
"Was he hinting that our intriguing is known? Vico, perhaps we should
disassociate ourselves from the conspirators."
"Perhaps
you are right, Zelenza,"
Vico muttered. He picked up
one of the coins again and examined it, back and front. "There is no such
nation," he grumbled, "but the coin is perfectly minted." He
picked up the torn sheet of paper, held it to the light. "Nor have I ever
seen such paper, Zelenza,
nor such a strange
language, although, on closer examination, it appears to have some similarities
to the English tongue."
The House of Letta-Goldini was located now in
the San Toma district, an imposing structure through which passed the proceeds
of a thousand ventures in a hundred lands.
Riccardo
Letta looked up from his desk at his assistant. "Then he really has
appeared? Per
favore, Lio,
bring me the papers pertaining to the, ah, account. Allow me a matter of ten
minutes to refresh my memory and then bring the Sior to me." ...
The
great grandson of Vico Letta, head of the House of Letta-Goldini, came to his
feet elegantly, bowed in the sweeping style of his day, said, "Your
servant, Sior . . ."
The
newcomer bobbed his head in a jerky, embarrassed return of the courtesy, said,
"Mister Smith."
"A
chair, Lustrissimo? And now, pray pardon my abruptness. One's
duties when responsible for a house of the magnitude of Letta-Goldini..."
Mister Smith held out a torn sheet of paper.
His Italian was abominable. "The agreement made with Marin Goldini,
exactly one century ago."
Riccardo
Letta took the paper. It was new, clean and fresh, which brought a frown to his
high forehead. He took up an aged, yellowed fragment from before him and placed
one against the other. They matched to perfection. "Amazing, Sior, but
how can it be that my piece is yellow with age and your own so fresh?"
Mister
Smith cleared his throat. "Undoubtedly, different methods have been used
to preserve them."
"Undoubtedly."
Letta relaxed in his chair, placed fingertips together. "And undoubtedly
you wish your capital and the interest it has accrued. The amount is a sizable
one, Sior; we shall find it necessary to call in various accounts."
Mister
Smith shook his head. "I want to continue on the original basis."
Letta sat upright.
"You mean for another hundred years?"
"Precisely. I have
faith in your management, Sior Letta."
"I
see." Riccardo Letta had not maintained his position in the cutthroat
world of Venetian banking and commerce by other than his own ability. It took
him only a moment to gather himself. "The appearance of your ancestor,
Sior, has given rise to a veritable legend in this house. You are familiar
with the details?"
The other nodded, warily.
"He
made several suggestions, among them that we support the Council of Ten. We
are now represented on the Council, Sior. I need not point out the advantage.
He also suggested we investigate the travels of Marco Polo, which we failed to
do—but should have. Above all in strangeness was his recommendation that
investments be made in the Hanse towns."
"Well, and wasn't that
a reasonable suggestion?"
"Profitable,
Sior, but hardly reasonable. Your ancestor appeared in the year 1300 but the
Hanseatic League wasn't formed until 1358."
The
small man, strangely garbed in much the same manner tradition had it the first
Mister Smith had appeared, twisted his face wryly. "I am afraid I am in no
position to explain, Sior. And now, my own time is limited, and, in view of the
present size of my investment, I am going to request you have drawn up~a
contract more binding than the largely verbal one made with the founders of
your house."
Riccardo
Letta rang a small bell on his desk and the next hour was spent with assistants
and secretaries. At the end of that period, Mister Smith, a sheaf of documents
in his hands, said, "And now may I make a few suggestions?"
Riccardo
Letta leaned forward, his eyes narrow. "By all means."
"Your
house will continue to grow and you will have to think in terms of spreading to
other nations. Continue to back the Hanse cities. In the not too far future a
remarkable man named Jacques Coeur will become prominent in France. Bring him
into the firm as French representative. However, all support should be
withdrawn from him in the year 1450."
Mister Smith stood up, preparatory to
leaving. "One warning, Sior Letta. As a fortune grows large, the jackals
gather. I suggest the magnitude of this one be hidden and diffused. In this
manner temporary setbacks may be suffered through the actions of this prince, or
that revolution, but the fortune will continue."
Riccardo
Letta was not an overly religious man, but after the other had left he crossed
himself as had his predecessor.
There were twenty of them waiting in the year
1500. They sat about a handsome conference table, representatives of half a
dozen nations, arrogant of mien, sometimes cruel of face. Waldemar Gotland
acted as chairman.
"Your
Excellency," he said in passable English, "may we assume this is your
native language?"
Mister
Smith was taken aback by the number of them, but, "You may," he said.
"And
that you wish to be addressed as Mister Smith in the English fashion?"
Smith nodded. "That
will be acceptable."
"Then,
sir, if you will, your papers. We have named a committee, headed by Emil de
Hanse, to examine them as to authenticity."
Smith
handed over his sheaf of papers. "I desired," he complained,
"that this investment be kept secret."
"And
it has been to the extent possible, Excellency. Its size is now fantastic.
Although the name Letta-Goldini is still kept, no members of either family
still survive. During the past century, Excellency, numerous attempts have been
made to seize your fortune."
"To
be expected," Mister Smith said interestedly. "And what foiled
them?"
"Principally
the number involved in its management, Excellency. As a representative from
Scandinavia, it is hardly to my interest to see a Venetian or German corrupt
The Contract."
Antonio
Ruzzini bit out, "Nor to our interest to see Wal-demar Gotland attempt it.
There has been blood shed more than once in the past century, Zelenza."
The papers were accepted as
authentic.
Gotland
cleared his throat. "We have reached the point, Excellency, where the
entire fortune is yours, and we merely employees. As we have said, attempts
have been made on the fortune. We suggest, if it is your desire to continue its
growth ..."
Mister Smith nodded here.
".
. . that a stronger contract, which we have taken the liberty to draw up, be
adopted."
"Very
well, I'll look into it. But first, let me give you my instructions."
There
was an intake of breath and they sat back in their chairs.
Mister
Smith said, "With the fall of Constantinople to the Turks, Venetian power
will drop. The house must make its center elsewhere."
There was a muffled
exclamation.
Mister
Smith went on: "The fortune is now considerable enough that we can afford
to take a long view. We must turn our eyes westward. Send a representative of
the fortune to Spain. Shortly, the discoveries in the west will open up
investment opportunities there. Support men named Hernando Cortez and
Francisco Pizarro. In the middle of the century withdraw our investments from
Spain and enter them in England, particularly in commerce and manufacture.
There will be large land grants in the new world; attempt to have
representatives of the fortune gain some of them. There will be confusion at
the death of Henry VIII; support his daughter Elizabeth.
"You will find, as industry expands in
the northern countries, that it is impractical for a manufacturer to operate
where there are literally scores of saints' days and fiestas. Support such
religious leaders as demand a more, ah, puritanical way of life."
He
wound it up. "One other thing. This group is too large. I suggest that
only one person from each nation involved be admitted to the secret of the
contract,"
"Gentlemen," Mister Smith said in
1600, "turn more to manufacture and commerce in Europe, to agriculture,
mining and accumulation of large areas of real estate in the New World. Great
fortunes will be made this century in the East; be sure that our various houses
are first to profit."
They waited about the conference table in
London. The clock, periodically and nervously checked, told them they had a
full fifteen minutes before Mister Smith was expected.
Sir
Robert took a pinch of snuff, presented an air of nonchalance he did not feel.
"Gentlemen," he said, "frankly I find it difficult to believe
the story legend. Come now, after everything has been said, what does it boil
down to?"
Pierre
Deflage said softly, "It is a beautiful story, messieurs. In the year 1300 a somewhat bedraggled
stranger appeared before a Venetian banking house and invested ten pieces of
gold, the amount to continue for a century. He made certain suggestions that
would have tried the abilities of Nostradamus. Since then his descendants have
appeared each century at this day and hour and reinvested the amount, never
collecting a sou
for their own use, but always
making further suggestions. Until now, messieurs, we
have reached the point where it is by far the largest fortune in the world. I,
for instance, am considered the wealthiest man in France." He shrugged
eloquently. "While we all know I am but an employee of The Contract."
"I
submit," Sir Robert said, "that the story is impossible. It has been
one hundred years since our Mr. Smith has
supposedly appeared. During that period there have been ambitious men and
unscrupulous men in charge of The Contract. They concocted this fantastic tale
for their own ends. Gentlemen, there is no Mr. Smith and never was a Mr. Smith.
The question becomes, shall we continue the farce, or shall we take measures to
divide the fortune and each go our own way?"
A small voice from the doorway said, "If
you think that possible, sir, we shall, have to work still more to make the
contract iron bound. May I introduce myself? You may call me Mr. Smith."
In 1800 he said, "You are to back, for
twelve years, the adventurer Bonaparte. In 1812 drop him. You are to invest
largely in the new nation, the United States. Send a representative to New
York immediately. This is to be a century of revolution and change. Withdraw
support from monarchy . . ." There was a gasp from around the table.
". . . and support the commercial classes. Back a certain Robert Clive in
India. Withdraw all support of Spain in Latin America. In the American civil
war to come, back the North.
"Largely,
gentlemen, this is to be the century of England. Remember that." He looked
away for a moment, off into an unknown distance. "Next century will be
different, but not even I know what lies beyond its middle."
After
he was gone, Amschel Mayer, representative from Vienna, murmured,
"Colleagues, have you realized that at last one of The Contract relicts
makes sense?"
Lord
Windermere scowled at him, making small attempt to disguise his anti-semitism.
"What'd'ya mean by that, sir?"
The
international banker opened the heavy box which contained the documents handed
down since the day of Goldini. He emerged with a medium-sized gold coin.
"One of the original invested coins has been retained all these centuries,
my lord."
Windermere
took it and read. "The United States of America. Why, confound it, man,
this is ridiculous. Someone has been a-pranking. The coin couldn't have
existed in Goldini's day; the colonies proclaimed their independence less than
twenty-five years ago."
Amschel
Mayer murmured, "And the number at the bottom of the coin. I wonder if
anyone has ever considered that it might be a date."
Windermere
stared at the coin again. "A date? Don't be an ass! One does not date a
coin more than a century ahead of time."
Mayer rubbed his beardless face with a
thoughtful hand. "More than six centuries ahead of time, my lord."
Over cigars and brandy they went into the
question in detail. Young Warren Piedmont said, "You gentlemen have the
advantage of me. Until two years ago I knew only vaguely of The Contract in
spite of my prominence in the American branch of the hierarchy. And,
unfortunately, I was not present when Mr. Smith appeared in 1900 as were the rest
of you."
"You
didn't miss a great deal," Von Borman growled. "Our Mr. Smith, who
has all of us tied so tightly with The Contract that everything we own, even to
this cigar I hold in my hand, is his—our Mr. Smith is insignificant, all but
threadbare."
"Then there actually
is such a person," Piedmont said.
Albert
Marat, the French representative, snorted expressively. "Amazingly
enough, messieurs,
his description, even to
his clothes, is exactly that handed down from Goldini's day." He chuckled.
"We have one advantage this time."
Piedmont frowned.
"Advantage?"
"Unbeknown
to Mr. Smith, we took a photo of him when he appeared in 1900. It will be interesting
to compare it with his next appearance."
Warren
Piedmont continued to frown his lack of understanding and Hideka Mitsuki
explained. "You have not read the novels of the so clever Mr. H. G.
Wells7"
"Never heard of
him."
Smith-Winston,
of the British branch, said, "To sum it up, Piedmont, we have discussed
the possibility that our Mr. Smith is a time traveler."
"Time traveler! What
in the world do you mean?"
"This
is the year 1910. In the past century science has made strides beyond the
conception of the most advanced scholars of 1810. What strides will be made in
the next fifty years, we can only conjecture. That they will even embrace
travel in time is mind-twisting for us, but not impossible."
"Why fifty years? It will be a full
century before—" "No. This time Mr. Smith informed us that he is not
to wait until the year 2000 for his visit. He is scheduled for July 16, 1960.
At that time, friends, I am of the opinion
that
we shall find what our Mr. Smith has in mind to do with the greatest fortune the
world has ever seen."
Von
Borman looked about him and growled, "Has it occurred to you that we
eight men are the only persons in the world who even know The Contract
exists?" He touched his chest. "In Germany, not even the Kaiser knows
that I directly own—in the name of The Contract, of course—or control possibly
two thirds of the corporate wealth of the Reich."
Marat
said, "And has it occurred to you that all our Monsieur Smith need do is
demand his wealth and we are penniless?"
Smith-Winston
chuckled bitterly. "If you are thinking in terms of attempting to do
something about it, forget it. For half a millennium the best legal brains of
the world have been strengthening The Contract. Wars have been fought over
attempts to .change it. Never openly, of course. Those who died did so of
religion, national destiny, or national honor. . . . But never has the attempt
succeeded. The Contract goes on."
Piedmont
said, "To get back to this 1960 appearance. Why do you think Smith will
reveal his purpose, if this fantastic belief of yours is correct, that he is a
time traveler?"
"It
all fits in, old man," Smith-Winston told him. "Since Goldini's time
he has been turning up in clothing not too dissimilar to what we wear today. He
speaks English—with an American accent. The coins he first gave Goldini were
American double-eagles minted in this century. Sum it up. Our Mr. Smith desired
to create an enormous fortune. He has done so and I believe that in 1960 we
shall learn his purpose."
He
sighed and went back to his cigar. "I am afraid I shall not see it. Fifty
years is a long time."
They
left the subject finally and went to another almost as close to their hearts.
Von Borman growled, "I contend that if The Contract is to be served,
Germany needs a greater place in the sun. I intend to construct a Berlin to
Baghdad railroad and to milk the East of its treasures."
Marat
and Smith-Winston received his words coldly. "I assure you, monsieur," Marat said,
"we shall have to resist any such plans on your part. The Contract can best
be served by maintaining the status quo; there is no room for
German
expansion. If you persist in this, it will mean war and you recall what Mr.
Smith prophesied. In case of war, we are to withdraw support from Germany and,
for some reason, Russia, and support the allies. We warn you, Borman."
"This
time Mr. Smith was wrong," Borman growled. "As he said, oil is to be
invested in above all, and how can Germany secure oil without access to the
East? My plans will succeed and the cause of The Contract will thus be forwarded."
The
quiet Hideka Mitsuki murmured, "When Mr. Smith first invested his pieces
of gold I wonder if he realized the day would come when the different branches
of his fortune would plan and carry out international conflicts in the name of
The Contract?"
There were only six of them gathered around
the circular table in the Empire State suite when he entered. None had been
present at his last appearance and of them all only Warren Piedmont had ever
met and conversed with anyone who had actually seen Mr. Smith. Now the
octogenarian held up an aged photograph and compared it to the newcomer.
"Yes," he muttered, "they were right."
Mr.
Smith handed over an envelope heavy with paper. "Don't you wish to check
these?"
Piedmont
looked about the table. Besides himself, there was John Smith-Winston, the
second, from England; Rami Mardu, from India; Warner Voss-Richer, of West Germany;
Mito Fisuki, of Japan; Juan Santos, representing Italy, France and Spain.
Piedmont said, "We have here a photo taken of you in 1900, sir; it is
hardly necessary to identify you further. I might add, however, that during the
past ten years we have had various celebrated scientists at work on the
question of whether or not time travel was possible."
Mr.
Smith said, "So I have realized. In short, you have spent my money in
investigating me."
There
was little of apology in Piedmont's voice. "We have faithfully, some of us
for all our adult lives, protected The Contract. I will not deny that the pay
is the highest in the world; however it is only a job. Part of the job consists of protecting The Contract and your interests
from those who would fraudulently appropriate the fortune. We spend millions
every year in conducting investigations."
"You're right, of course. But your
investigations into the possibilities of time travel... ?"
"Invariably
the answer was that it was impossible. Only one physicist offered a glimmer of
possibility."
"Ah, and who was
that?"
"A
Professor Alan Shirey who does his research at one of the California
universities. We were careful, of course, not to hire his services directly.
When first approached he admitted he had never considered the problem but he
became quite intrigued. However, he finally stated his opinion that the only
solution would involve the expenditure of an amount of power so great that
there was no such quantity available."
"I
see," Mr. Smith said wryly. "And following this period for which you
hired the professor, did he discontinue his investigations into time
travel?"
Piedmont made a vague
gesture. "How would I know?"
John
Smith-Winston interrupted stiffly. "Sir, we have all drawn up complete
accountings of your property. To say it is vast is an understatement beyond
even an Englishman. We should like instructions on how you wish us to continue."
Mr.
Smith looked at him. "I wish to begin immediate steps to liquidate."
"Liquidate!" six
voices ejaculated.
"I
want cash, gentlemen," Smith said definitely. "As fast as it can be
accomplished, I want my property converted into cash."
Warner
Voss-Richer said harshly, "Mr. Smith, there isn't enough coinage in the
world to buy your properties."
"There
is no need for there to be. I will be spending it as rapidly as you can convert
my holdings into gold or its credit equivalent. The money will be put back into
circulation over and over again."
Piedmont was aghast. "But why?" He held his hands up
in dismay. "Can't you realize the repercussions of such a
move? Mr. Smith, you must explain the purpose of all
this___ "
Mr. Smith said, "The
purpose should be obvious. And the pseudonym of Mr. Smith is no longer
necessary. You may call me Shirey—Professor Alan Shirey. You see, gentlemen,
the question with which you presented me, whether or not time travel was
possible, became consumingly interesting. I have finally solved, I believe, all fhe problems involved. I need now
only a fantastic amount of power to activate my device. Given such an amount of
power, somewhat more than is at present produced on the entire globe, I
believe I shall be able to travel in time."
"But,
but why? All this, all this . . . Cartels, governments,
wars . . ." Warren Piedmont's aged voice wavered, faltered.
Mr.
Smith—Professor Alan Shirey—looked at him strangely. "Why, so that I may
travel back to early Venice where I shall be able to make the preliminary steps
necessary for me to secure sufficient funds to purchase such an enormous
amount of power output."
"And
six centuries of human history," said Rami Mardu, Asiatic representative,
so softly as hardly to be heard. "Its meaning is no more than this . .. ?"
Professor Shirey looked at
him impatiently.
"Do
I understand you to contend, sir, that there have been other centuries of human
history with more meaning?"
JUNIOR
Robert Abernathy
Robert Abernathy published some 40 science-ficlion stories
between 1942 and 1957. (His lasl story, "Grandma's Lie Soap", was
reprinted in the 2nd Annual SF.) When last heard from (1957), he was living in
Tucson, Arizona, and doing something Highly Classified for a nearby U.S.
Government Establishment—presumably something involving his triplex of
specialties, physics, photography, and Slavonic languages. He has since moved
to Seattle, where rumor has it he is employed at something unclassifiedly
professorial.
"Junior",
which first appeared in Galaxy, January,
1956, and then in the 1st Annual, is reprinted here with the author's
permission, but without any precise knowledge of his whereabouts. Any
information leading to the possibility of paying him for this inclusion will be
deeply appreciated by the editor.
■
■■■
"Junior!"
bellowed Pater.
"Junior!" squeaked Mater, a quavering echo.
"Strayed
off again—the young idiot! If he's playing in the shallows, with this tide
going out . . ." Pater let the sentence hang blackly. He leaned upslope as
far as he could stretch, angrily scanning the shoreward reaches where light
filtered more brightly down through the murky water, where the sea-surface
glinted like bits of broken mirror.
No sign of Junior.
Mater
was peering fearfully in the other direction, toward where, as daylight faded,
the slope of the coastal shelf was fast losing itself in green profundity. Out
there, beyond sight at this hour, the reef that loomed sheltering above them
fell away in an abrupt cliffhead, and the abyss began.
"Oh, oh," sobbed Mater. "He's
lost. He's swum into the abyss and been eaten by a sea monster." Her
slender stem rippled and swayed on its base, and her delicate crown of pinkish
tentacles trailed disheveled in the pull of the ebbtide.
"Pish,
my dear!" said Pater. "There are no sea monsters. At worst," he
consoled her stoutly, "Junior may have been trapped in a tidepool."
"Oh,
oh," gulped Mater. "He'll be eaten by a land monster."
"There
ARE no land monsters!" snorted Pater. He straightened his stalk so
abruptly that the stone to which he and Mater were conjugally attached creaked
under them. "How often must I assure you, my dear, that WE are the highest
form of life?" (And, for his world and geologic epoch, he was quite
right.)
"Oh, oh," gasped
Mater.
Her
spouse gave her up. "JUNIOR!" he roared in a voice that loosened the
coral along the reef.
Round
about, the couple's bereavement had begun attracting attention. In the
thickening dusk tentacles paused from winnowing the sea for their owners'
suppers, stalked heads turned curiously here and there in the colony. Not far
away a threesome of maiden aunts, rooted en brosse to a single substantial boulder,
twittered condolences and watched Mater avidly.
"Discipline!"
growled Pater. "That's what he needs! Just wait till I—"
"Now, dear—■"
began Mater shakily.
"Hi, folks!"
piped Junior from overhead.
His
parents swiveled as if on a single stalk. Their offspring was floating a few
fathoms above them, paddling lazily against the ebb; plainly he had just swum
from some crevice in the reef nearby. In one pair of dangling tentacles he
absently hugged a roundish stone, worn sensuously smooth by pounding surf.
"WHERE HAVE YOU
BEEN?"
"Nowhere,"
said Junior innocently. "Just playing hide-and-go-sink with the
squids."
"With
the other polyps,"
Mater corrected him primly.
She detested slang.
Pater was eyeing Junior with ominous calm.
"And where," he asked, "did you get that stone?"
Junior
contracted guiltily. The surfstone slipped from his tentacles and plumped to
the sea-floor in a flurry of sand. He edged away, stammering, "Well, I
guess maybe ... I might have gone a
little ways toward the beach . . ."
"You
guess! When I was a polyp," said Pater, "the small fry obeyed their
elders, and no guess about it!"
"Now, dear—" said
Mater.
"And
no spawn of mine," Pater warmed to his lecture, "is going to flout my
words! Junior . . . COME HERE."
Junior
paddled cautiously round the homesite just out of tentacle-reach. He said in a
small voice, "I won't."
"DID YOU HEAR
ME?"
"Yes," admitted
Junior.
The
neighbors stared. The three maiden aunts clutched one another with muted
shrieks, savoring beforehand the language Pater would now use.
But Pater said
"Ulp!"—no more.
"Now,
dear," put in Mater quickly. "We must be patient. You know all
children go through larval stages."
"When
I was a polyp . . ." Pater began rustily. He coughed out an accidentally
inhaled crustacean, and started over: "No spawn of mine . . ."
Trailing off, he only glared, then roared abruptly, "SPRAT!"
"I
won't!" said Junior reflexively, and backpaddled into the coral shadows of
the reef.
"That
wallop," seethed Pater, "wants a good polyping. I mean—" He
glowered suspiciously at Mater and the neighbors.
"Dear," soothed Mater, "didn't
you notice . . . ?" "OF COURSE I— Notice what?"
"What
Junior was doing. Carrying a stone. I don't suppose he understands why, just
yet, but . . ."
"A
stone? Ah, uh, to be sure, a stone. Why . ..
Why, my dear, do you realize what this MEANS?"
Pater was once more
occupied with improving Mater's mind. It was a long job, without foreseeable
end—especially since he and his helpmeet were both firmly rooted for life to
the same tastefully decorated homesite (garnished by Pater himself with
colored pebbles, shells, urchins, and bits of coral in the rather rococo style
which had prevailed during Pater's courting days as a free-swimming polyp).
"Intelligence,
my dear," pronounced Pater, "is quite incompatible with motility.
Just think—how could ideas congeal in a brain shuttled hither and yon,
bombarded with ever-changing sense-impressions? Look at the lower species,
which swim about all their lives, incapable of taking root or thought! True
Intelligence, my dear—as distinguished from Instinct, of course—presupposes
the fixed viewpoint!"
He
paused. Mater murmured, "Yes, dear," as she always did at this point.
Junior
undulated past, swimming toward the abyss. He moved a bit heavily now; it was
growing hard for him to keep his maturely thickening afterbody in a horizontal
posture.
"Just
look at the young of our own kind," said Pater. "Scatterbrained
larvae, wandering greedily about in search of new stimuli. But, praise be, they
mature at last into sensible, sessile adults. While yet the unformed intellect
rebels against the ending of carefree polyphood, instinct, the wisdom of
Nature, instructs them to prepare for the great change!"
He nodded wisely as Junior came gliding back
out of the gloom of deep water. Junior's tentacles clutched an irregular basalt
fragment which he must have picked up down the rubble-strewn slope. As he
paddled slowly along the rim of the reef, the adult anthozoans located directly
below looked up and hissed irritable warnings. He was swimming a bit more
easily now, and, if Pater had not been a firm believer in Instinct, he might
have been reminded of the grossly materialistic theory, propounded by some
iconoclast, according to which a maturing polyp's tendency to grapple objects
was merely a matter of taking on ballast.
"See!"
declared Pater triumphantly. "I don't suppose he understands why, just yet. . . but Instinct urges him infallibly to assemble the
materials for his future homesite."
Junior
let the rock fragment fall, and began plucking restlessly at a coral
outcropping.
"Dear," said Mater, "don't you
think you ought to tell him...
?"
"Ahem!" said
Pater. "The wisdom of Instinct—"
"As
you've always said, a polyp needs a parent's guidance," remarked Mater.
"Ahem!"
repeated Pater. He
straightened his stalk and bellowed authoritatively, "JUNIOR! Come
here!"
The prodigal polyp swam
warily close. "Yes, Pater?"
"Junior,"
said his parent solemnly, "now that you are growing up, it behooves you to
know certain facts."
Mater
blushed a delicate lavender and turned away on her side of the rock.
"Very
soon now," said Pater, "you will begin feeling an irresistible urge ... to sink to the bottom, to take root
there in some sheltered location which will be your lifetime site. Perhaps you
even have an understanding already with some—ah—charming young polyp of the
opposite gender, whom you would invite to share your home-site. Or, if not,
you should take all the more pains to make that site as attractive as possible,
in order that such a one may decide to grace it with—"
"Uh-huh,"
said Junior understanding^. "That's what the fellows mean when they say
any of 'em'U fall for a few high-class rocks."
Pater
marshaled his thoughts again. "Well, quite apart from such material
considerations as selecting the right rocks, there are certain—ah—matters we do
not ordinarily discuss."
Mater
blushed a more pronounced lavender. The three maiden aunts, rooted to their
boulder within easy earshot of Pater's carrying voice, put up a respectable
pretense of searching one another for water-fleas.
"No
doubt," said Pater, "in the course of your harum-scarum adventurings
as a normal polyp among polyps, you've noticed the ways in which the lower
orders reproduce themselves—the activities of the fishes, the Crustacea, the
marine worms will not have escaped your attention."
"Uh-huh," said
Junior, treading water.
"You
will have observed that among these there takes place a good deal
of—ah—maneuvering for position. But among intelligent, firmly rooted beings
like ourselves, matters are of course on a less crude and direct plane. What
among lesser creatures is a question of tactics belongs, for us, to the realm
of strategy." Pater's tone grew confiding. "Now, Junior, once you're
settled, you'll realize the importance of being easy in your mind about your
offspring's parentage. Remember, a niche in brine saves trying. Nothing like
choosing your location well in the first place. Study the currents around your
prospective site—particularly their direction and force at such crucial times
as flood-tide. Try to make sure you and your future mate won't be too close
down-current from anybody else's site, since in a case like that accidents can
happen. You understand, Junior?"
"Uh-huh," acknowledged Junior.
"That's what the fellows mean when they say don't let anybody get the
drop on you."
"Well," said Pater flatly.
"But it all seems sort of silly,"
said Junior stubbornly. "I'd
rather just keep moving
around and not have to do all that figuring. And the ocean's full of things I haven't seen yet. I don't
want to grow down!"
Mater paled with shock. Pater gave his spawn
a scalding, scandalized look. "You'll learn! You can't beat Biology,"
he said thickly, creditably keeping his voice down. "Junior, you may
go!"
Junior bobbled off, and Pater admonished
Mater sternly: "We must have patience, my dear! All children pass through
these larval stages ..."
"Yes, dear," sighed Mater.
At long last, Junior seemed
to have resigned himself to making the best of it.
With considerable exertions, hampered by his
increasing bottom-heaviness, he was fetching loads of stones, seaweed and
other debris to a spot downslope, and there laboring over what promised to be
a fairly ambitious cairn. Judging by what they could see of it, his homesite
might even prove a credit to the colony (thus Mater mused) and attract a mate
who would be a good catch (so went Pater's thoughts).
Junior was still to be seen at times along
the reef in company with his free-swimming friends among the other polyps, at
some of whom his parents had always looked askance, fearing they were by no
means well-bred. In fact, there was strong suspicion that some of them—waifs
from the disreputable shallows district in the hazardous reaches just below the
tide-mark—had never been bred at all, but were products of budding, a practice
frowned on in polite society.
However,
Junior's appearance and rate of locomotion made it clear he would soon be done
with juvenile follies. As Pater repeated with satisfaction, you can't beat
Biology; as one becomes more and more bottle-shaped the romantic illusions of
youth must inevitably perish.
"I
always knew there was sound stuff in the youngster," declared Pater
expansively.
"At
least he won't be able to go around with those ragamuffins much longer,"
breathed Mater thankfully.
"What
does the young fool think he's doing, fiddling round with soapstone?"
grumbled Pater, peering critically through the green to try to make out the
details of Junior's building. "Doesn't he know it's apt to slip its place
in a year or two?"
"Look,
dear," hissed Mater acidly, "isn't that the little polyp who was so
rude once ... I wish she wouldn't
keep watching Junior like that. Our northwest neighbor heard positively that she's the child of an only parent!"
"Never
mind," Pater turned to reassure her. "Once Junior is properly rooted,
his self-respect will cause him to keep riffraff at a distance. It's a matter
of psychology, my dear; the vertical position makes all the difference in one's
thinking."
The great day arrived.
Laboriously
Junior put a few finishing touches to his construction—which, so far as could
be seen from a distance, had turned out decent-looking enough, though it was
rather questionably original in design, lower and flatter than was customary.
With
one more look at his handiwork, Junior turned bottom-end-down and sank wearily
onto the finished site. After a minute, he paddled experimentally, but flailing
tentacles failed to lift him—he was already rooted, and growing more
solidly so by the moment
The younger polyps peered from the hollows of
the reef in roundeyed awe touched with fear.
"Congratulations!"
cried the neighbors. Pater and Mater bowed this way and that in acknowledgment.
Mater waved a condescending tentacle to the three maiden aunts.
"I told you so!" said Pater triumphantly.
"Yes, dear," said
Mater meekly.
Suddenly
there were outcries of alarm from the dwellers down-reef. A wave of dismay
swept audibly through all the nearer part of the colony. Pater and Mater looked
round and froze.
Junior
had begun paddling again, but this time in a most peculiar manner—with a rotary
twist and a sidewise scoop which looked awkward, but which he performed so
deftly that he must have practiced it. Fixed upright as he was now on the
platform he had built, he looked for all the world as if he were trying to swim
sidewise.
"He's
gone mad!" squeaked Mater, grasping at the obvious straw.
"I—" gulped Pater, "I'm afraid not."
At
least, they saw, there was method in Junior's actions. He went on paddling in
the same fashion—and now he, and his platform with him, were farther away than
they had been, and growing more remote all the time.
Parts
of the homesite that was not a homesite revolved in some way incomprehensible
to eyes that had never seen the like. And the whole affair trundled along,
rocking at bumps in the sandy bottom, and squeaking painfully; nevertheless, it
moved.
The
polyps watching from the reef swam out and frolicked after Junior, watching
his contrivance go and chattering questions, while their parents bawled at
them to keep away from that.
The
three maiden aunts shrieked faintly and swooned in one another's tentacles. The
colony was shaken as it had not been since the tidal wave.
"COME
BACK!" thundered Pater. "You CAN'T do that!"
"Come back!" shrilled Mater. "You can't do that!" "Come back!" gabbled the neighbors.
"You can't do that!"
But
Junior was past listening to reason. Junior was on wheels.
SENSE FROM THOUGHT DIVIDE
Mark Clifton
"Remembrance and reflection, how allied;
What thin partitions sense from thought divide."
Pope
Alarfc Clifton (1911—1962) had an impact an science fiction entirely out of proportion to
the quantity of his published work. His first two stories, "Star,
Bright" and "What Have I Done?", appeared almost simultaneously
early in 1952 in Astounding
and Galaxy, followed by nine more in rapid succession.
Between 1954 and 1962 there were, altogether, another nine, and four novels.
Yet at one time he seemed to dominate the pages of Astounding (then the leading magazine in the field) so
completely that some disgruntled fans began referring to it as the "Clifton
House Organ."
Born
in Oklahoma, Clifton was teaching rural school when he was thirteen; got fired
for teaching evolution; went to the city and worked his way through
college-equivalency by ghosting papers and theses for enrolled students. He
spent 20 years in personnel work and industrial engineering, retired at
forty-one after a serious illness, and turned to science fiction. His last
novel was Eight Keys
to Eden (1960),
and he wrote one nonficlion book for college students. Opportunity Unlimited (1959).
"Sense
from Thought Divide" first appeared in Astounding, March, 1955, in a slightly longer version; it
is reprinted here from the 1st SF Annual.
His story, "What Now, Little Man?" was in the 5th Annual, and
"Hang Head, Vandall" in the 8th.
■ ■■■
When i opened the door to my secretary's office, I could see her looking up from her desk at the Swami's face with an
expression of fascinated skepticism. The Swami's back was toward me, and on jt
hung flowing folds of a black cloak. His turban was white, except where it had
rubbed against the back of his neck.
"A
tall, dark, and handsome man will soon come into your life," he was
intoning in that sepulchral voice men
habitually use in their dealings with the
absolute.
Sara's
green eyes focused beyond him, on me, and began to twinkle.
"And
there he is right now," she commented dryly. "Mr. Kennedy, Personnel
Director for Computer Research."
The
Swami whirled around, his heavy robe following the movement in a practiced
swirl. His liquid black eyes looked me over shrewdly, and he bowed toward me as
he vaguely touched his chest, lips and forehead. I expected him to murmur,
"Effendi," or "Bwana Sahib," or something, but he must
have felt silence was more impressive.
I
acknowledged his greeting by pulling down one corner of my mouth. Then I
looked at his companion.
The
young lieutenant was standing very straight, very stiff, and a flush of pink
was starting up from his collar and spreading around his clenched jaws to leave
a semicircle of white in front of his red ears.
"Who are you?" I
asked.
"Lieutenant
Murphy." He managed to open his teeth a bare quarter of an inch for the
words to come out. "Pentagon!" His light gray eyes pierced me to see
if I were impressed.
I wasn't.
"Division of Matériel and Supply," he continued in staccato, imitating a machine gun.
I waited. It was obvious he wasn't through
yet. He hesitated, and I could see his Adam's apple travel up above the knot
of his tie and back down again as he swallowed. The pink flush deepened into
brilliant red.
"Poltergeist
Section," he said defiantly.
"What?" The exclamation was out before I could catch
it.
He tried to glare at me, but his eyes were
pleading instead.
"General Sanfordwaithe said you'd
understand." He intended to make it matter of fact in a sturdy, confident
voice, but there was the undertone of a wail. It was time I lent a hand.
"You're West Point,
aren't you?" I asked kindly.
He straightened still more. I hadn't believed
it possible.
"Yes, sir!" He wanted to keep the
gratitude out of his voice, but it was there. And for the first time, he had
spoken the habitual term of respect to me.
"Well,
what do you have here, Lieutenant Murphy?" I nodded toward the Swami who
had been wavering between a proud, free stance and that of a drooping
supplicant.
"According
to my orders, sir," he said formally, "you have requested the
Pentagon furnish you with one half dozen, six, male-type poltergeists. I am
delivering the first of them to you, sir."
Sara's
mouth, hanging wide open, reminded me to close my own.
So
the Pentagon was calling my bluff. Well, maybe they did have something at that.
I'd see.
"Float me over that ash tray there on
the desk," I said casually to the Swami.
He
looked at me as if I'd insulted him, and I could anticipate some reply to the
effect that he was not applying for domestic service. But the humble supplicant
rather than the proud and fierce hill man won. He started to pick up the ash
tray from Sara's desk.
"No,
no!" I exclaimed. "I didn't ask you to hand it to me. I want you to TK it over to me. What's the matter? Can't you even TK a
simple ash tray?"
The lieutenant's eyes were
getting bigger and bigger.
"Didn't
your Poltergeist Section test this guy's aptitudes for telekinesis before you
brought him from Washington all the way out here to Los Angeles?" I
snapped at him.
The lieutenant's lips thinned to a bloodless line.
"I am certain he must have qualified
adequately," he said stiffly, and this time left off the "sir."
"Well, I don't
know," I answered doubtfully. "If he hasn't even enough telekinetic
ability to float me an ash tray across the room—"
The Swami recovered himself
first. He put the tips of his long fingers together in the shape of a
swaybacked steeple, and rolled his eyes upward.
"I am an instrument of
infinite wisdom," he intoned. "Not a parlor magician."
"You mean that with all your infinite
wisdom you can't do it," I accused flatly.
"The vibrations are not favorable—"
he rolled the words sonorously.
"All
right," I agreed. "We'll go somewhere else, where they're
better!"
"The
vibrations throughout all this crass, materialistic Western world—" he
intoned.
"All
right," I interrupted, "we'll go to India, then. Sara, call up and
book tickets to Calcutta on the first possible plane!" Sara's mouth had
been gradually closing, but it unhinged again.
"Perhaps
not even India," the Swami murmured, hastily. "Perhaps Tibet."
"Now
you know we can't get admission into Tibet while the Communists control
it," I argued seriously. "But how about Nepal? That's a fair
compromise. The Maharaja-dhiraja's friendly now. I'll settle for Nepal."
The
Swami couldn't keep the triumphant glitter out of his eyes. He had me.
"I'm
afraid it would have to be Tibet," he said positively. "Nowhere else
in all this troubled world are the vibrations—"
"Oh
go on back to Flatbush!" I interrupted disgustedly. "You know as well
as I that you've never been outside New York before in your life. Your accent's
as phony as the pear-shaped tones of a midwestern garden club president. Can't
even TK a simple ash tray!"
I turned to the amazed
lieutenant.
"Will you come into my
office?" I asked him.
He looked over at the
Swami, in doubt.
"He
can wait out here," I said. "He won't run away. There isn't any
subway, and he wouldn't know what to do. Anyway, if he did get lost, your Army
Intelligence could find him. Give G-2 something
to work on. Right through this door, lieutenant."
"Yes,
sir," he said meekly, and preceded me into my office.
I
closed the door behind us and waved him over to the crying chair. He folded at
the knees and hips only, as if there were no hinges at all in the ramrod of his
back. He sat up straight, on the edge of his chair, ready to spring into
instant charge of battle. I went around back to my desk and sat down.
"Now, lieutenant," I said
soothingly, "tell me all about it."
I could have sworn his square chin quivered
at the note of sympathy in my voice. I wondered, irrelevantly, if the lads at
West Point all slept with their faces confined in wooden frames to get that
characteristically rectangular look.
"You
knew I was from West Point," he said, and his voice held a note of awe.
"And you knew, right away, that Swami was a phony from Flatbush."
"Come
now," I said with a shrug. "Nothing to get mystical about. Patterns.
Just patterns. Every environment leaves the stamp of its matrix on the
individual shaped in it. It's a personnel man's trade to recognize the make of
a person, just as you would recognize the make of a rifle."
"Yes,
sir. I see, sir," he answered. But of course he didn't. And there wasn't
much use to make him try. Most people cling too desperately to the ego-saving
formula: Man cannot know man.
"Look,
lieutenant," I said, getting down to business, "Have you been checked
out on what this is all about?"
"Well,
sir," he answered, as if he were answering a question in class, "I
was cleared for top security, and told that a few months ago you and your Dr.
Auerbach, here at Computer Research, discovered a way to create antigravity. I
was told you claimed you had to have a poltergeist in the process. You told
General Sanfordwaithe that you needed six of them, males. That's about all,
sir. So the Poltergeist Division discovered the Swami, and I was assigned to
bring him out here to you."
"Well
then, Lieutenant Murphy, you go back to the Pentagon and tell General
Sanfordwaithe that—" I could see by the look on his face that my message
would probably not get through verbatim. "Never mind, I'll write it,"
I amended disgustedly. "And you can carry the message."
I punched Sara's button on
my intercom.
"After
all the exposure out there to the Swami," I said, "if you're still
with us on this crass, materialistic plane, will you bring your book?"
"My
astral self has been hovering over you, guarding you, every minute," Sara
answered dreamily.
"Can it take shorthand?"
I asked dryly.
"Maybe I'd better come
in," she replied.
When
she came through the door the lieutenant gave her one appreciative glance, then
returned to his aloof pedestal of indifference. Obviously his pattern was to
stand in majestic splendor and allow the girls to fawn somewhere down near his
shoes. These lads with a glamour-boy complex almost always gravitate toward
some occupation which will require them to wear a uniform. Sara catalogued him
as quickly as I did, and seemed unimpressed. But you never can tell about a
woman; the smartest of them will fall for the most transparent poses.
"General
Sanfordwaithe, dear sir," I began, as she sat down at one corner of my
desk and flipped open her book. "It takes more than a towel wrapped around
the head and some mutterings about infinity to get poltergeist effects. So I am
returning your phony Swami to you with my compliments—"
"Beg
your pardon, sir," the lieutenant interrupted, and there was a certain
note of suppressed triumph in his voice. "In case you rejected our
applicant for the poltergeist job you have in mind, I was to hand you
this." He undid a lovingly polished button of his tunic, slipped his hand
beneath the cloth and pulled forth a long, sealed envelope.
I
took it from him and noted the three sealing-wax imprints on the flap. From
being carried so close to his heart for so long, the envelope was slightly less
crisp than when he had received it. I slipped my letter opener in under the
side flap, and gently extracted the letter without, in any way, disturbing the
wax seals which were to have guaranteed its privacy. There wasn't any point in
my doing it, of course, except to demonstrate to the lieutenant that I
considered the whole deal as a silly piece of cloak and dagger stuff.
After
the general formalities, the letter was brief: "Dear Mr. Kennedy: We
already know the Swami is a phony, but our people have been convinced that in
spite of this there are some unaccountable effects. We have advised your general
manager, Mr. Henry Grenoble, that we are in the act of carrying out our part of
the agreement, namely, to provide you with six male-type poltergeists, and to
both you and him we are respectfully suggesting that you get on with the
business of putting the antigravity units into immediate production."
I folded the letter and tucked it into one side
of my desk pad. I looked at Sara.
"Never
mind the letter to General Sanfordwaithe," I said. "He has successfully cut off my retreat in that direction."
I looked over at the lieutenant. "All
right," I said resignedly, "I'll apologize to the
Swami, and make a try at using him."
I
picked up the letter again and pretended to be reading it. But this was just a
stall, because I had suddenly been struck by the thought that my extreme haste
in scoring off the Swami and trying to get rid of him was because I didn't want
to get involved again with poltergeists. Not any, of any nature.
Old Stone Face, our general manager, claimed
to follow the philosophy of building men, not machines. To an extent he did.
His favorite phrase was, "Don't ask me how. I hired you to tell me."
He hired a man to do a job, and I will say for him, he left that man alone as
long as the job got done. But when a man flubbed a job, and kept on flubbing
it, then Mr. Henry Grenoble stepped in and carried out his own job—general
managing.
He
had given me the assignment of putting antigrav units into production. He had
given me access to all the money I would need for the purpose. He had given me
sufficient time, months of it. And, in spite of all this cooperation, he still
saw no production lines which spewed out antigrav units at some such rate as
seventeen and five twelfths per second.
Apparently
he got his communication from the Pentagon about the time I got mine.
Apparently it contained some implication that Computer Research, under his management,
was not pursuing the cause of manufacturing antigrav units with diligence and
dispatch. Apparently he did not like this.
I
had no more than apologized to the Swami, and received his martyred
forgiveness, and arranged for a hotel suite for him and the lieutenant, when
Old Stone Face sent for me. He began to manage with diligence and dispatch.
"Now you look here, Kennedy," he
said forcefully, and his use of my last name, rather than my first, was a warning.
"I've given you every chance. When you and Auer-bach came up with that
antigrav unit last fall, I didn't ask a lot of fool questions. I figured you
knew what you were doing. But the whole winter has passed, and here it is
spring, and you haven't done anything that I can see. I didn't say anything
when you told General Sanfordwaithe that you'd have to have poltergeists to
carry on the work, but I looked it up. First I thought you'd flipped your lid,
then I thought you were sending us all on a wild goose chase so we'd leave you
alone, then I didn't know what to think."
I nodded. He wasn't
through.
"Now I think you're just pretending the
whole thing doesn't exist because you don't want to fool with it." I
couldn't argue with that.
"For
the first time, Kennedy, I'm asking you what happened?" he said firmly,
but his tone was more telling than asking. So I was going to have to discuss
frameworks with Old Stone Face, after all.
"Henry,"
I asked slowly, "have you kept up your reading in theoretical
physics?"
He
blinked at me. I couldn't tell whether it meant yes or no.
"When we went to school, you and
I—" I hoped my putting us both in the same age group would tend to
mollify him a little, "physics was all snug, secure, safe, definite. A
fact was a fact, and that's all there was to it. But there's been some changes
made. There's the coordinate systems of Einstein, where the relationships of
facts can change from framework to framework. There's the application of multivalued
logic to physics where a fact becomes not a fact any longer. The astronomers
talk about the expanding universe—it's a piker compared to man's expanding
concepts about that universe."
He
waited for more. His face seemed to indicate that I was beating around the
bush.
"That
all has a bearing on what happened," I assured him. "You have to
understand what was behind the facts before you can understand the facts
themselves. First, we weren't trying to make an antigrav unit at all. Dr. Auerbach
was playing around with a chemical approach to cybernetics. He made up some
goop which he thought would store memory impulses, the way the brain stores
them. He brought a plastic cylinder of it over to me, so I could discuss it
with you. I laid it on my desk while I went on with my personnel management
business at hand."
Old
Stone Face opened a humidor and took out a cigar. He lit it slowly and
deliberately and looked at me sharply as he blew out the first puff of smoke.
"The nursery over in the plant had been
having trouble with a little girl, daughter of one of our production women.
She'd been throwing things, setting things on fire. The teachers didn't know
how she did it, she just did it. They sent her to me. I asked her about it. She
threw a tantrum, and when it was all over, Auerbach's plastic cylinder of goop
was trying to fall upward, through the ceiling. That's what happened," I
said.
He
looked at his cigar, and looked at me. He waited for me to tie the facts to the
theory. I hesitated, and then tried to reassure myself. After all, we were in
the business of manufacturing computers. The general manager ought to be able
to understand something beyond primary arithmetic.
"Jennie
Malasek was a peculiar child with a peculiar background," I went on.
"Her mother was from the old country, a Slav. There's the inheritance of a
lot of peculiar notions. Maybe she had passed them on to her daughter. She kept
Jennie locked up in their room. The kid never got out with other children.
Children, kept alone, never seeing anybody, get peculiar notions all by
themselves. Who knows what kind of a coordinate system she built up, or how it
worked? Her mother could come home at night and go about her tasks talking
aloud, half to the daughter, half to herself. 'I really burned that foreman up,
today,' she'd say. Or, 'Oh, boy, was he fired in a hurry!' Or, 'She got herself
thrown out of the place,' things like that."
"So
what does that mean, Ralph?" he asked. His switch to my first name was encouraging.
"To
a child who never knew anything else," I answered, "one who had never
learned to distinguish reality from unreality—as we would define it from our
agreed framework—a special coordinate system might be built up where
'Everybody was up in the air at work, today,' might be taken literally. Under
the old systems of physics that couldn't happen, of course—it says in the
textbooks—but since it has been happening all through history, in thousands of
instances, in the new systems of multivalued physics we recognize it. Under
the old system, we already had all the major answers, we thought. Now that
we've got our smug certainties knocked out of us, we're just fumbling along,
trying to get some of the answers we thought we had.
"We
couldn't make that cylinder activate others. We tried. We're still trying. In
ordinary cybernetics you can have one machine punch a tape and it can be fed
into another machine, but that means you first have to know how to code and
decode a tape mechanically. We don't know how to code or decode a psi effect.
We know the Auerbach cylinder will store a psi impulse, but we don't know how.
So we have to keep working with psi gifted people, at least until we've
established some of the basic laws governing psi."
I
couldn't tell by Henry's face whether I was with him or far far away. He told
me he wanted to think about it, and made a little motion with his hand that I
should leave the room.
I
walked through the suite of executive offices and down a sound-rebuffing
hallway. The throbbing clatter of manufacture of metallic parts made a welcome
sound as I went through the far doorway into the factory. I saw a blueprint
spread on a foreman's desk as I walked past. Good old blueprint. So many
millimeters from here to there, made of such and such an alloy, a hole punched
here with an allowance of five ten-thousandths plus or minus tolerance. Snug,
secure, safe. I wondered if psi could ever be blueprinted. Or suppose you put
a hole here, but when you looked away and then looked back it had moved, or
wasn't there at all?
Quickly,
I got myself into a conversation with a supervisor about the rising rate of
employee turnover in his department. That was something also snug, secure,
safe. All you had to do was figure out human beings.
I spent the rest of the morning on such
pursuits, working with things I understood.
On
his first rounds of the afternoon, the interoffice messenger brought me a
memorandum from the general manager's office. I opened it with some
misgivings.
Mr.
Grenoble felt he should work with me more closely on the antigrav project. He
understood, from his researches, that the most positive psi effects were
experienced during a seance with a medium. Would I kindly arrange for the Swami
to hold a seance that evening, after office hours, so that he might analyze the
man's methods and procedures to see how they could fit smoothly into Company
Operation. This was not to be construed as interference in the workings of my
department but in the interest of pursuing the entire matter with diligence
and dispatch—
The seance was to be held
in my office.
I
had had many peculiar conferences in this room— from union leaders stripping
off their coats, throwing them on the floor and stomping on them; to uplifters
who wanted to ban cosmetics on our women employees so the male employees would
not be tempted to think Questionable Thoughts. I could not recall ever having
held a seance before.
My
desk had been moved out of the way, over into one corner of the large room. A
round table was brought over from the salesmen's report writing room (used
there more for surreptitious poker playing than for writing reports) and placed
in the middle of my office—on the grounds that it had no sharp corners to gouge
people in their middles if it got to cavorting about recklessly. In an
industrial plant one always has to consider the matter of safety rules and
accident insurance rates.
In
the middle of the table there rested, with dark fluid gleaming through clear
plastic cases, six fresh cylinders which Auerbach had prepared in his
laboratory over in the plant.
Auerbach
had shown considerable unwillingness to attend the seance; he pleaded being
extra busy with experiments just now, but I gave him that look which told him
I knew he had just been stalling around the last few months, the same as I had.
If the psi effect had never
come out in the first place, there wouldn't have been any mental conflict. He
could have gone on with his processes of refining, simplifying and increasing
the efficiency ratings of his goop. He would have settled gladly for a chemical
compound which could have added two and two upon request; but when that compound
can learn and demonstrate that there's no such thing as gravity, teaching it
simple arithmetic is like ashes in the mouth.
I said as much to him. I stood there in his laboratory, leaned up against a work bench, and
risked burning an acid hole in the sleeve of my jacket just to put over an air
of unconcern. He was perched on the edge of an opposite work bench, swinging
his feet, and hiding the expression in his eyes behind the window's reflection
upon his polished glasses. I said even more.
"You know," I
said reflectively, "I'm completely unable to understand the attitude of
supposedly unbiased men of science. Now you take all that mass of data about
psi effects, the odd and unexplainable happenings, the premonitions, the
specific predictions, the accurate descriptions of far away simultaneously
happening events. You take that whole mountainous mass of data, evidence,
phenomena—"
A slight turn of his head gave me a glimpse
of his eyes behind the glasses. He looked as if he wished I'd change the
subject. In his dry, undemonstrative way, I think he liked me. Or at least he
liked me when I wasn't trying to make him think about things outside his safe
and secure little framework. But I wasn't going to stop.
"Before
Rhine came along, and brought all this down to the level of laboratory
experimentation," I pursued, "how were those things to be explained?
Say a fellow had some unusual powers, things that happened around him, things
he knew without any explanation for knowing them. I'll tell you. There were two
courses open to him. He could express it in the semantics of spiritualism, or
he could admit to witchcraft and sorcery. Take your pick; those were the only
two systems of semantics available to him.
"We've
got a third one now—parapsychology. If I had asked you to attend an experiment
in parapsychology, you'd have agreed at once. But when I ask you to attend a
seance, you balk! Man, what difference does it make what we call it? Isn't it
up to us to investigate the evidence wherever we find it? No matter what kind
of semantic debris it's hiding in?"
Auerbach shoved himself
down off the bench, and pulled out a beat-up package of cigarettes.
"All right, Kennedy," he said
resignedly, "I'll attend your seance."
The other invited guests were Sara,
Lieutenant Murphy, Old Stone Face, myself, and, of course, the Swami. This was
probably not typical of the Swami's usual audience composition.
Six chairs were placed at
even intervals around the table. I had found soft white lights overhead to be
most suitable for my occasional night work, but the Swami insisted that a blue
light, a dim one, was most suitable for his night work.
I made no objection to that condition. One of
the elementary basics of science is that laboratory conditions may be varied
to meet the necessities of the experiment. If a red-lighted darkness is
necessary to an operator's successful development of photographic film, then I
could hardly object to a blue-lighted darkness for the development of the
Swami's effects.
Neither could I object to the Swami's
insistence that he sit with his back to the true North. When he came into the
room, accompanied by Lieutenant Murphy, his thoughts seemed turned in upon
himself, or wafted somewhere out of this world. He stopped in midstride, struck
an attitude of listening, or feeling, perhaps, and slowly shifted his body back
and forth.
"Ah," he said at last, in a tone of
satisfaction, "there is the North!"
It was, but this was not particularly
remarkable. There is no confusing maze of hallways leading to the Personnel
Department from the outside. Applicants would be unable to find us if there
were. If he had got his bearings out on the street, he could have managed to
keep them.
He picked up the nearest chair with his own
hands and shifted it so that it would be in tune with the magnetic lines of
Earth. I couldn't object. The Chinese had insisted upon such placement of
household articles, particularly their beds, long before the Earth's magnetism
had been discovered by science. The birds had had their directionfinders
attuned to it, long before there was man.
Instead of objecting, the lieutenant and I
meekly picked up the table and shifted it to the new position. Sara and
Auerbach came in as we were setting the table down. Auer-bach gave one quick
lqok at the Swami in his black cloak and nearly white turban, and then looked
away.
"Remember semantics," I murmured to
him, as I pulled out Sara's chair for her. I seated her to the left of the
Swami. I seated Auerbach to the right of him. If the lieutenant was, by
chance, in cahoots with the Swami, I would foil them to the extent of not
letting them sit side by side at least. I sat down at the opposite side of the
table from the Swami. The lieutenant sat down between me and Sara.
The general manager came through the door at
that instant, and took charge immediately.
"All right now," Old Stone Face
said crisply, in his low, rumbling voice, "no fiddle faddling around.
Let's get down to business."
The Swami closed his eyes. .
"Please be
seated," he intoned to Old Stone Face. "And now, let us all join
hands in an unbroken circle."
Henry shot him a beetlebrowed look as he sat
down between Auerbach and me, but at least he was cooperative to the extent
that he placed both his hands on top of the table. If Auerbach and I reached
for them, we would be permitted to grasp them.
I leaned back and snapped off the overhead
light to darken the room in an eerie, blue glow.
We sat there, holding hands, for a full ten
minutes. Nothing happened.
It was not difficult to
estimate the pattern of Henry's mind. Six persons, ten minutes, equals one
man-hour. One man-hour of idle time to be charged into the cost figure of the
antigrav unit. He was staring fixedly at the cylinders which lay in random
positions in the center of the table, as if to assess their progress at this
processing point. He stirred restlessly in his chair, obviously dissatisfied
with the efficiency rating of the manufacturing process.
The Swami seemed to sense the impatience, or
it might have been coincidence.
"There
is some difficulty," he gasped in a strangulated, high voice. "My
guides refuse to come through."
"Harrumph!"
exclaimed Old Stone Face. It left no doubt about what he would do if his guides did not obey orders on the double.
"Someone
in the circle is not a True Believer!" the Swami accused in an incredulous
voice.
In
the dim blue light I was able to catch a glimpse of Sara's face. She was on the
verge of breaking apart. I managed to catch her eye and flash her a stern
warning. Later she told me she had interpreted my expression as stark fear, but
it served the same purpose. She smothered her laughter in a most unladylike
sound somewhere between a snort and a squawk.
The
Swami seemed to become aware that somehow he was not holding his audience
spellbound.
"Wait!"
he commanded urgently; then he announced in awe-stricken tones, "I feel a
presence!"
There
was a tentative, half-hearted rattle of some casta-nets-'-which could have been
managed by the Swami wiggling one knee, if he happened to have them concealed
there. This was followed by the thin squawk of a bugle —which could have
been accomplished by sitting over toward one side and squashing the air out of
a rubber bulb attached to a ten-cent party horn taped to his thigh.
Then
there was nothing. Apparently his guides had made a tentative appearance and
were, understandably, completely intimidated by Old Stone Face. We sat for
another five minutes.
"Harrumph!"
Henry cleared his throat again, this time louder and more commanding.
"That
is all," the Swami said in a faint, exhausted voice. "I have returned
to you on your material plane."
The handholding broke up in
the way bits of metal, suddenly charged positive and negative, would fly
apart. I leaned back again and snapped on the white lights. We all sat there a
few seconds, blinking
in what seemed a sudden
glare.
The Swami sat with his chin dropped down to
his chest. Then he raised stricken, liquid eyes.
"Oh,
now I remember where I am," he said. "What happened? I never
know."
Old
Stone Face threw him a look of withering scorn. He picked up one of the
cylinders and hefted it in the palm of his hand. It did not fly upward to bang
against the ceiling. It weighed about what it ought to weigh. He tossed the
cylinder, contemptuously, back into the pile, scattering them over the table.
He pushed back his chair, got to his feet, and stalked out of the room without
looking at any of us.
The
Swami made a determined effort to recapture the spotlight.
"I'm
afraid I must have help to walk to the car," he whispered. "I am
completely exhausted. Ah, this work takes so much out of me. Why do I go on with
it? Why? Why? Why?"
He
drooped in his chair, then made a valiantly brave effort to rise under his own
power when he felt the lieutenant's hands lifting him up. He was leaning
heavily on the lieutenant as they went out the door.
Sara looked at me dubiously.
"Will
there be anything else?" she asked. Her tone suggested that since nothing
had been accomplished, perhaps we should get some work out before she left.
"No,
Sara," I answered. "Good night. See you in the morning."
She nodded and went out the
door.
Apparently
none of them had seen what I saw. I wondered if Auerbach had. He was a trained
observer. He was standing beside the table looking down at the cylinders. He
reached over and poked at one of them with his forefinger. He was pushing it
back and forth. It gave him no resistance beyond normal inertia. He pushed it a
little farther out of parallel with true North. It did not try to swing back.
So
he had seen it. When I'd laid the cylinders down on the table they were in
random positions. During the seance there had been no jarring of the table, not
even so much as a rap or quiver which could have been caused by the Swami's
lifted knee. When we'd shifted the table, after the
Swami
had changed his chair, the cylinders hadn't been disturbed. When Old Stone Face
had been staring at them during the seance—seance?, hah!—they were lying in
inert, random positions.
But
when the light came back on, and just before Henry had picked one up and tossed
it back to scatter them, every cylinder had been laid in orderly parallel—and
with one end pointing to true North!
I
stood there beside Auerbach, and we both poked at the cylinders some more. They
gave us no resistance, nor snowed that they had any ideas about it one way or
the other.
"It's
like so many things," I said morosely. "If you do just happen to
notice anything out of the ordinary at all, it doesn't seem to mean
anything."
"Maybe
that's because you're judging it outside of its own framework," Auerbach
answered. I couldn't tell whether he was being sarcastic or speculative.
"What I don't understand," he went on, "is that once the
cylinders having been activated by whatever force there was in action —all
right, call it psi—well, why didn't they retain it, the way, the other cylinders
retained the antigrav force?"
I
thought for a moment. Something about the conditional setup seemed to give me
an idea.
"You
take a photographic plate," I reasoned. "Give it a weak exposure to
light, then give it a strong blast of overexposure. The first exposure is
going to be blanked out by the second. Old Stone Face was feeling pretty
strongly toward the whole matter."
Auerbach looked at me,
unbelieving.
"There
isn't any rule about who can have psi talent," I argued. "I'm just
wondering if I shouldn't wire General Sanfordwaithe and tell him to cut
our order for poltergeists down to five."
I spent a glum, restless night. I knew, with
certainty, that Old Stone Face was going to give me trouble. I didn't need any
psi talent for that; it was an inevitable part of his pattern. He had made up
his mind to take charge of this antigrav operation, and he wouldn't let one
bogus seance stop him more than momentarily.
If it weren't so close to direct interference
with my department, I'd have been delighted to sit on the side lines and watch
him try to command psi effects to happen. That would be like commanding some
random copper wire and metallic cores to start generating electricity.
For once I could have overlooked the
interference with my department if I didn't know, from past experience, that
I'd be blamed for the consequent failure. And there was something else, too; I
had the feeling that if I were allowed to go along, carefully and
experimentally, I just might discover a few of the laws about psi. There was
the tantalizing feeling that I was on the verge of knowing at least something.
The Pentagon people had been right. The Swami
was an obvious phony of the baldest fakery, yet he had something. He had
something, but how was I to get hold of it? Just what kind of turns with what
around what did you make to generate a psi force? It took two thousand years
for man to move from the concept that amber was a stone with a soul to the
concept of static electricity. Was there any chance I could find some shortcuts
in reducing the laws governing psi? The one bright spot of my morning was that
Auerbach hadn't denied seeing the evidence of the cylinders pointing North.
It turned out to be the only bright spot. I
had no more than got to my office and sorted out the routine urgencies from
those which had to be handled immediately, when Sara announced the lieutenant
and the Swami. I put everything else off, and told her to send them right in.
The Swami was in an incoherent rage. The
lieutenant was contracting his eyebrows in a scowl and clenching his fists in
frustration. In a voice, soaring into the falsetto, the Swami demanded that he
be sent back to Brooklyn where he was appreciated. The lieutenant had orders to
stay with the Swami, but he didn't have any orders about returning either to
Brooklyn or the Pentagon. I managed, at last, to get the lieutenant seated in a
straight chair, but the Swami couldn't stay still long enough. He stalked up
and down the room, swirling his slightly odorous black cloak on the turns. Gradually
the story came out.
Old Stone Face, a strong
advocate of Do It Now, hadn't wasted any time. From his home he had called the
Swami at his hotel and commanded him to report to the general manager's office
at once. They all got there about the same time, and Henry had waded right in.
Apparently
Henry, too, had spent a restless night. He accused the Swami of inefficiency,
bungling, fraud, deliberate insubordination, and a few other assorted faults
for having made a fool out of us all at the seance. He'd as much as commanded
the Swami to cut out all the shillyshallying and get down to the business of
activating anti-grav cylinders, or else. He hadn't been specific about what the
"or else" would entail.
"Now
I'm sure he really didn't mean—" I began to pour oil on the troubled
waters. "With your deep insight, Swami— The fate of great martyrs
throughout the ages—" Gradually the ego-building phrases calmed him down.
He grew willing to listen, if for no more than the anticipation of hearing more
of them.
He
settled down into the crying chair at last, his valence shifting from outraged
anger to a vast and noble forgiveness. This much was not difficult. To get him
to cooperate, consciously and enthusiastically, might not be so easy.
Each
trade has its own special techniques. The analytical chemist has a series of
routines he tries when he wishes to reduce an unknown compound to its
constituents. To the chemically uneducated, this may appear to be a fumbling,
hit or miss, kind of procedure. The personnel man, too, has his series of
techniques, which may appear to be no more than random, pointless conversation.
I
first tried the routine process of reasoning. I didn't expect it to work; it
seldom does, but it can't be eliminated until it has been tested.
"You
must understand," I said slowly, soothingly, "that our intentions are
constructive. We are simply trying to apply the scientific method to something
which has, heretofore, been wrapped in mysticism."
The
shocked freezing of his facial muscles gave me the answer to that.
"Science
understands nothing, nothing at all!" he snapped. "Science tries to
reduce everything to test tubes and formulae; but I am the instrument of a
mystery which man can never know."
"Well, now," I said reasonably.
"Let us not be inconsistent. You say this is something man was not meant
to know; yet you, yourself, have devoted your life to gaining a greater
comprehension of it."
"I
seek only to rise above my material self so that I might place myself in
harmony with the flowing symphony of Absolute Truth," he lectured me
sonorously. The terminology didn't bother me; the jargon of the sciences sometimes
grows just as esoteric. Maybe it even meant something.
One
thing I was sure it meant. There are two basic approaches to the meaning of
life and the universe about us. Man can know: That is the approach of science,
its whole meaning. There are mysteries which man was not meant to know: That is
the other approach. There is no reconciling of the two on a reasoning basis. I
represented the former. I wasn't sure the Swami was a true representative of
the latter, but at least he had picked up the valence and the phrases.
I
made a mental note that reasoning was an unworkable technique with this
compound. Henry, a past master at it, had already tried threats and abuse. That
hadn't worked. I next tried one of the oldest forms in the teaching of man, a
parable.
I
told him of my old Aunt Dimity, who was passionately fond of Rummy, but
considered all other card games sinful.
"Ah, how well she proves my point,"
the Swami countered. "There is an inner voice, a wisdom greater than the
mortal mind to guide Us—"
"Well
now," I asked reasonably, "why would the inner voice say that Rummy
was O.K., but Casino wasn't?" But it was obvious he liked the point he had
made better than he had liked the one I failed to make.
So I
tried the next technique. Often an opponent will come over to your side if you
just confess, honestly, that he is a better man than you are, and you need his
help. What was the road I must take to achieve the same understanding he had?
His eyes glittered at that.
"First
there is fasting, and breathing, and contemplating self," he murmured
mendaciously. "I would be unable to aid you until you gave me full
ascendancy over you, so that I might guide your every thought—"
I decided to try
inspiration.
"Do
you realize, Swami," I asked, "that the one great drawback throughout
the ages to a full acceptance of psi is the lack of permanent evidence? It has
always been evanescent, perishable. It always rests solely upon the word of
witnesses. But if I could show you a film print, then you could not doubt the
existence of photography, could you?"
I
opened my lower desk drawer and pulled out a couple of the Auerbach cylinders
which we had used the night before. I laid them on top of the desk.
"These
cylinders," I said, "act like the photographic film. They will
record, in permanent form, the psi effects you command. At last, for all
mankind the doubt will be stilled; man will at once know the truth; and you
will take your place among the immortals."
I
thought it was pretty good. It should have done the trick. But the Swami was
staring at the cylinders first in fascination, then fear, then in horror. He
jumped to his feet, without bothering to swirl his robe majestically, rushed
over to the door, fumbled with the knob as if he were in a burning room,
managed to get the door open, and rushed outside. The lieutenant gave me a
puzzled look, and went after him.
I drew a deep breath, and exhaled it audibly.
My testing procedures hadn't produced the results I'd expected, but the last
one had revealed something else—or rather, had confirmed two things we knew
already.
One: The Swami believed himself to be a fraud.
Two: He wasn't.
Both
cylinders were pointing toward the door. I watched them, at first not quite
sure; like the Swami, I'd have preferred not to believe the evidence. But the
change in their perspective with the angles of the desk made the motion
unmistakable.
Almost
as slowly as the minute hand of a watch, they were creeping across the desk toward
the door. They, too, were trying to escape from the room.
I
nudged them with my fingers. They hustled along a little faster, as if
appreciative of the help, even coming from me. I saw they were moving faster,
as if they were learning as they tried it. I turned one of them around.
Slowly
it turned back and headed for the door again. I lifted one of them down to the
floor. It had no tendency to float, but it kept heading for the door. The other
one fell off the desk while I was fooling with the first one. The jar didn't
seem to bother it any. It, too, began to creep across the rug toward the door.
I opened the door for them. Sara looked up.
She saw the two cylinders come into view, moving under their own power.
"Here
we go again," she said, resignedly. The two cylinders pushed themselves
over the door sill, got clear outside my office. Then they went inert. Both
Sara and I tried nudging them, poking them. They just lay there; mission
accomplished. I carried them back inside my office and lay them on the floor.
Immediately both of them began to head for the door again.
"Simple," Sara said dryly,
"they just can't stand to be in the same room with you, that's all."
"You're not just whistling, gal," I
answered. "That's the whole point."
"Have I said something clever?" she
asked seriously. I took the cylinders back into my office and put them in a
desk drawer. I watched the desk for a while, but it didn't change position.
Apparently it was too heavy for the weak force activating the cylinders.
I picked up the phone and called Old Stone
Face. I told him about the cylinders.
"There!" he
exclaimed with satisfaction. "I knew all that fellow needed was a good
old-fashioned talking to. Some day, my boy, you'll realize that you still have
a lot to learn about handling men." "Yes, sir," I answered.
At that, Old Stone Face had a point. If he
hadn't got in and riled things up, maybe the Swami would not have been
emotionally upset enough to generate the psi force which had activated these
new cylinders.
Did that mean that psi was linked with
emotional upheaval? Well, maybe. Not necessarily, but Rhine had proved that
strength of desire had an effect upon the frequency index of telekinesis.
Was there anything at all we knew about psi,
so that we could start cataloguing, sketching in the beginnings of a pattern?
Yes, of course there was.
First,
it existed. No one could dismiss the mountainous mass of evidence unless he
just refused to think about the subject.
'
Second,
we could, in time, know what it was and how it worked. You'd have to give up
the entire basis of scientific attitude if you didn't admit that.
Third,
it acted like a sense, rather than as something dependent upon the intellectual
process of thought. You could, for example—I argued to my imaginary listener—
command your nose to smell a rose, and by autosuggestion you might think you
were succeeding; that is, until you really did smell a real rose, then you'd
know that you'd failed to create it through a thought pattern. The sense would
have to be separated from the process of thinking about the sense.
So
what was psi? But, at this point, did it matter much? Wasn't the main issue one
of learning how to produce it, use it? How long did we work with electricity
and get a lot of benefits from it before we formed some theories about what it
was? And, for that matter, did we know what it was, even yet? "A flow of
electrons" was a pretty meaningless phrase, when you stopped to think
about it. I could say psi was a flow of psitrons, and it would mean as much.
I
reached over and picked up a cigarette. I started fumbling around in the
center drawer of my desk for a match-book. I didn't find any. Without thinking,
I opened the drawer containing the two cylinders. They were pressing up against
the side of the desk drawer, still trying to get out of the room. Single
purposed little beasts, weren't they?
I
closed the drawer, and noticed that I was crushing out my cigarette in the ash
tray, just as if I'd smoked it. My nerves weren't all they should be this morning.
Which
brought up the fourth point, and also took me right back to where I started.
Nerves...
Emotional upheavals.
Rhine's
correlations between interest, belief, and ability to perform...
It seemed very likely that a medium such as
the Swami, whose basic belief was There Are Mysteries, would be unable to
function in a framework where the obvious intent was to unveil those mysteries!
That
brought up a couple more points. I felt pretty sure of them. I felt as if I
were really getting somewhere. And I had a situation which was ideal for
proving my points.
I flipped the intercom key,
and spoke to Sara.
"Will
you arrange with her foreman for Annie Malasek to come to my office right
now?" I asked. Sara is flippant when things are going along all right, but
she knows when to buckle down and do what she's asked. She gave me no personal
reactions to this request.
Yes,
Annie Malesek would be a good one. If anybody in the plant believed There Are
Mysteries, it would be Annie. Further, she was exaggeratedly loyal to me. She
believed I was responsible for turning her little Jennie, the little girl who'd
started all this poltergeist trouble, into a Good Little Girl. In this
instance, I had no qualms about taking advantage of that loyalty.
While I waited for her I called the
lieutenant at his hotel. He was in. Yes, the Swami was also in. They'd just
returned. Yes, the Swami was ranting and raving about leaving Los Angeles at
once. He had said he absolutely would have nothing more to do with us here at
Computer Research. I told Lieutenant Murphy to scare him with tales of the
secret, underground working of Army Intelligence, to quiet him down. And I
scared the lieutenant a little by pointing out that holding a civilian against
his will without the proper writ was tantamount to kidnaping. So if the Army
didn't want trouble with the Civil Courts, all brought about because the
lieutenant didn't know how to handle his man—
The
lieutenant became immediately anxious to cooperate with me. So then I soothed
him. I told him that, naturally, the Swami was unhappy. He was used to
Swami-ing, and out here he had been stifled, frustrated. What he needed was
some credulous women to catch their breath at his awe-inspiring insight and
gaze with fearful rapture into his eyes. The lieutenant didn't know where he
could find any women like that. I told him, dryly, that I would furnish some.
Annie
was more than cooperative. Sure, the whole plant was buzzing about that
foreign-looking Swami who had been seen coming in and out of my office. Sure, a
lot of the Girls believed in seances.
"Why? Don't you, Mr.
Kennedy?" she asked curiously.
I
said I wasn't sure, and she clucked her tongue in sympathy. It must be
terrible not to be sure, so . . . well, it must be just terrible. And I was
such a kind man, too ...
But
when I asked her to go to the hotel and persuade the Swami to give her a
reading, she was reluctant. I thought my plan was going to be frustrated, but
it turned out that her reluctance was only because she did not have a thing to
wear, going into a high-toned place like that.
Sara
wasn't the right size, but one of the older girls in the outer office would
lend Annie some clothes if I would let her go see the Swami, too. It developed
that her own teacher was a guest of Los Angeles County for a while, purely on a
trumped-up charge, you understand, Mr. Kennedy. Not that she was a cop hater or
anything like that. She was perfectly aware of what a fine and splendid job
those noble boys in blue did for us all, but—
In my own office! Well, you
never knew.
Yet,
what was the difference between her and me? We were both trying to get hold of
and benefit by psi effects, weren't we?
And
the important thing was that we could combine our efforts to our mutual
advantage. My interviewer's teacher had quite a large following, and now they
were all at loose ends. If the Swami were willing, she could provide a large
and ready-made audience for him. She would be glad to talk to him about it.
Annie
hurriedly said that she would be glad to talk to him about it, too; that she
could get up a large audience, too. So, even before it got started, I had my
rival factions at work. I egged them both on, and promised that I'd get Army
Intelligence to work with the local boys in blue to hold off making any raids.
Annie
told me again what a kind man I was. My interviewer spoke up quickly and said
how glad she was to find an opportunity for expressing how grateful she was for
the privilege of working right in the same department with such an
understanding, really intellectually developed adult. She eyed Annie sidelong,
as if to gauge the effects of her attempts to set me up on a pedestal, out of
Annie's reach.
I
hoped I wouldn't
start believing either one of them. I hoped I wasn't as inaccurate in my
estimates of people as was my interviewer. I wondered if she were really qualified
for the job she held. Then I realized this was a contest between two women and
I, a
mere male, was simply being used as the pawn. Well, that worked both ways. In a
fair bargain both sides receive satisfaction. I felt a little easier about my
tactical maneuvers.
But
the development of rivalry between factions of the audience gave me an
additional idea. Perhaps that's what the Swami really needed, a little rivalry.
Perhaps he was being a little too hard to crack because he knew he was the only
egg in the basket.
I called
Old Stone Face and told him what I planned. He responded that it was up to me.
He'd stepped in and got things under way for me, got things going, now it was
my job to keep them going. It looked as if he were edging out from under—or
maybe he really believed that.
Before
I settled into the day's regular routine, I wired General Sanfordwaithe, and
told him that if he had any more prospects ready would he please ship me one at
once, via air mail, special delivery.
The recital hall, hired for
the Swami's Los Angeles debut, was large enough to accommodate all the family
friends and relatives of any little Maribel who, having mastered
"Daffodils In May," for four fingers, was being given to the World.
It had the usual small stage equipped with pull-back curtains to give a
dramatic flourish, or to shut off from view the effects of any sudden nervous
catastrophe brought about by stage fright.
I got there, purposely a little late, in hopes
the house lights would already be dimmed and everything in progress; but about
a hundred and fifty people were milling around outside on the walk and in the
corridors. Both factions had really been busy.
Most of them were women, but, to my intense
relief, there were a few men. Some of these were only husbands, but a few of
the men wore a look which said they'd been far away for a long time. Somehow I
got the impression that instead of looking into a crystal ball, they would be
more inclined to look out of one.
It was a little disconcerting to realize that
no one noticed me, or seemed to think I was any different from anybody else. I
supposed I should be thankful that I wasn't attracting any attention. I saw my
interviewer amid a group of Older Girls. She winked at me roguishly, and patted
her heavy handbag significantly. As per instructions, she was carrying a couple
of the Auerbach cylinders.
I
found myself staring in perplexity for a full minute at another woman, before I
realized it was Annie. I had never seen her before, except dressed in factory
blue jeans, man's blue shirt, and a bandanna wrapped around her head. Her
companion, probably another of the factory assemblers, nudged her and pointed,
not too subtly, in my direction. Annie saw me then, and lit up with a big
smile. She started toward me, hesitated when I frowned and shook my head,
flushed with the thought that I didn't want to speak to her in public; then got
a flash of better sense than that. She, too, gave me a conspiratorial wink and
patted her handbag.
My confederates were doing
nicely.
Almost
immediately thereafter a horsefaced, mustached old gal started rounding people
up in a honey sweet, pear shaped voice, and herded them into the auditorium. I
chose one of the wooden folding chairs in the back row.
A
heavy jowled old gal came out in front of the closed curtains and gave a little
introductory talk about how lucky we all were that the Swami had consented to
visit with us. There was the usual warning to anyone who was not of the
esoteric that we must not expect too much, that sometimes nothing at all
happened, that true believers did not attend just to see effects. She reminded
us kitten-ishly that the guides were capricious, and that we must all help by
merging ourselves in the great flowing currents of absolute infinity.
She
finally faltered, realized she was probably saying all the things the Swami
would want to say—in the manner of people who introduce speakers everywhere—and
with a girlish little flourish she waved at someone off stage.
The house lights dimmed. The curtains swirled
up and back.
The Swami was doing all right for himself. He
was seated behind a small table in the center of the stage. A pale violet light
diffused through a huge crystal ball on the table, and threw his dark features
into sharp relief. It gave an astonishingly remote and inscrutable wisdom to
his features. In the pale light, and at this distance, his turban looked quite
clean.
He
began to speak slowly and sonorously. A hush settled over the audience, and
gradually I felt myself merging with the mass reaction of the rest. As I
listened, I got the feeling that what he was saying was of tremendous
importance, that somehow his words contained great and revealing wonders—or
would contain them if I were only sufficiently advanced to comprehend their
true meanings. The man was good, he knew his trade. All men search for truth at
one level or another. I began to realize why such a proportionate few choose
the cold and impersonal laboratory. Perhaps if there were a way to put science
to music—
The
Swami talked on for about twenty minutes, and then I noticed his voice had
grown deeper and deeper in tone, and suddenly, without any apparent transition,
we all knew it was not really the Swami's voice we were hearing. And then he
began to tell members of the audience little intimate things about themselves,
things which only they should know.
He
was good at this, too. He had mastered the trick of making universals sound
like specifics. I could do the same thing. The patterns of people's lives have
multiple similarities. To a far greater extent than generally realized the
same things happen to everyone. The idea was to take some of the lesser known
ones and word them so they seemed to apply to one isolated individual.
For
instance, I could tell a fellow about when he was a little boy there was a
little girl in a red dress with blond pigtails who used to scrap with him and
tattle things about him to her mother. If he were inclined to be credulous,
this was second sight I had. But it is a universal. What average boy didn't,
at one time or another, know a little girl with blond pigtails? What blond
little girl didn't occasionally wear a red dress? What little girl didn't
tattle to her mother about the naughty things the boys were doing?
The
Swami did that for a while. The audience was leaning forward in a rapture of
ecstasy. First the organ tones of his voice soothed and softened. The phrases
which should mean something if only you had the comprehension. The universals
applied as specifics. He had his audience in the palm of his hand. He didn't
need his crystal ball to tell him that.
But
he wanted it to be complete. Most of the responses had been from women. He gave
them the generalities which didn't sound like generalities. They confirmed with
specifics. But most were women. He wanted the men, too. He began to concentrate
on the men. He made it easy.
"I
have a message," he said. "From . . . now let me get it right . . .
from R. S. It is for a man in this audience. Will the man who knew R. S.
acknowledge?"
There
was a silence. And that was such an easy one, too. I hadn't planned to participate,
but, on impulse, since none of the other men were cooperating, I spoke up.
"Robert Smith!" I
exclaimed. "Good old Bob!"
Several
of the women sitting near me looked at me and beamed their approval. One of the
husbands scowled at me.
"I
can tell by your tone," the Swami said, and apparently he hadn't
recognized my tone, "that you have forgiven him. That is the message. He
wants you to know that he is happy. He is much wiser now. He knows now that he
was wrong."
One
of the women reached over and patted me on the shoulder.
But
the Swami had no more messages for men. He was smart enough tQ know where to
stop. He'd tried one of the simplest come-ons, and there had been too much of a
pause. It had almost not come off.
I
wondered who good old Bob Smith was? Surely, among the thousands of applicants
I'd interviewed, there must have been a number of them. And, being applicants,
of course some of them had been wrong.
The Swami's tones, giving one message after
another— faster and faster now, not waiting for acknowledgment or
confirmation—began to sink into a whisper. His speech became ragged, heavy. The
words became indistinguishable. About his head there began to float a pale,
luminescent sphere. There was a subdued gasp from the audience and then
complete stillness. As though, unbreathing, in the depths of a tomb, they
watched the sphere. It bobbed about, over the Swami's head and around him. At
times it seemed as if about to float off stage, but it came back. It swirled
out over the audience, but not too far, and never at such an angle that the
long, flexible dull black wire supporting it would be silhouetted against the
glowing crystal ball.
Then it happened. There was a gasp, a
smothered scream. And over at one side of the auditorium a dark object began bobbing
about in the air up near the ceiling. It swerved and swooped. The Swami's
luminescent sphere jerked to a sudden stop. The Swami sat with open mouth and
stared at the dark object which he was not controlling.
The
dark object was not confined to any dull black wire. It went where it willed.
It went too high and brushed against the ceiling.
There
was a sudden shower of coins to the floor. A compact hit the floor with a flat
spat. A handkerchief floated down more slowly.
"My
purse!" a woman gasped. I recognized my interviewer's voice. Her purse
contained two Auerbach cylinders, and they were having themselves a ball.
In
alarm, I looked quickly at the stage, hoping the Swami wasn't astute enough to
catch on. But he was gone. The audience, watching the bobbing purse, hadn't
realized it as yet. And they were delayed in realizing it by a diversion from
the other side of the auditorium.
"I
can't hold it down any longer, Mr. Kennedy!" a woman gasped out.
"It's taking me up into the air!"
"Hold on, Annie!" I shouted back.
"I'm coming!"
A chastened and subdued Swami sat in my
office the following morning, and this time he was inclined to be cooperative.
More, he was looking to me for guidance, understanding, and didn't mind
acknowledging my ascendancy.
And,
with the lieutenant left in the outer office, he didn't have any face to
preserve.
Later,
last night, he'd learned the truth of what happened after he had run away in a
panic. I'd left a call at the hotel for the lieutenant. When the lieutenant had
got him calmed down and returned my call, I'd instructed him to tell the Swami
about the Auerbach cylinders; to tell the Swami he was not a fake after all.
The
Swami had obviously spent a sleepless night. It is a terrible thing to have
spent years perfecting the art of fakery, and then to realize you needn't have
faked at all. More terrible, he had swallowed some of his own medicine, and all
through the night he had shivered in fear of some instant and horrible
retaliation. For him it was still a case of There Are Mysteries.
And
it was of no comfort to his state of mind right now that the four cylinders we
had finally captured last night were, at this moment, bobbing about in my
office, swooping and swerving around in the upper part of the room, like bats
trying to find some opening. I was giving him the full treatment. The first two
cylinders, down on the floor, were pressing up against my closed door, like
frightened little things trying to escape a room of horror.
The
Swami's face was twitching, and his long fingers kept twining themselves into
King's X symbols. But he was sitting it out. He was swallowing some of the hair
of the dog that bit him. I had to give him A for that.
"I've
been trying to build up a concept of the framework wherein psi seems to function,"
I told him casually, just as if it were all a formularized laboratory
procedure. "I had to pull last night's stunt to prove something."
He
tore his eyes away from the cylinders which were over exploring one corner of
the ceiling, and looked at me.
"Let's
go to electricity," I said speculatively. "Not that we know psi and
electricity have anything in common, other than some similar analogies, but we
don't know they don't. Both of them may be just different manifestations of the
same thing. We don't really know why a magnetized core, turning inside a coil
of copper wire, generates electricity.
"Oh we've got some phrases," I
acknowledged. "We've got a whole structure of phrases, and when you listen
to them they sound as if they ought to mean something—like the phrases you were
using last night. Everybody assumes they do mean something to the pundits. So,
since it is human to want to be a pundit, we repeat these phrases over and
over, and call them explanations. Yet we do know what happens, even if we do
just theorize about why. We know how to wrap something around something and get
electricity.
"Take
the induction coil," I said. "We feed a low-voltage current into one
end, and we draw off a high-voltage current from the other. But anyone who
wants, any time, can disprove the whole principle of the induction coil. All
you have to do is wrap your core with a nonconductor, say nylon thread, and
presto, nothing comes out. You see, it doesn't work; and anybody who claims it
does is a faker and a liar. That's what happens when science tries to investigate
psi by the standard methods.
"You
surround a psi-gifted individual with nonbeliev-ers, and probably nothing will
come out of it. Surround him with true believers; and it all seems to act like
an induction coil. Things happen. Yet even when things do happen, it is usually
impossible to prove it.
"Take
yourself, Swami. And this is significant. First we have the north point effect.
Then those two little beggars trying to get out the door. Then the ones which are
bobbing around up there. Without the cylinders there would have been no way to
know that anything had happened at all.
"Now,
about this psi framework. It isn't something you can turn on and off, at will.
We don't know enough yet for that. Aside from some believers and those
individuals who do seem to attract psi forces, we don't know, yet, what to wrap
around what. So, here's what you're to do: You're to keep a supply of these
cylinders near you at all times. If any psi effects happen, they'll record it.
Fair enough?
"Now,"
I said with finality. "I have anticipated that you might refuse. But
you're not the only person who has psi ability. I've wired General
Sanfordwaithe to send me another fellow; one who will cooperate."
The
Swami thought it over. Here he was with a suite in a good hotel; with an army
lieutenant to look after his earthly needs; on the payroll of a respectable
company; with a ready-made flock of believers; and no fear of the bunco squad.
He had never had it so good. The side money, for private readings alone, should
be substantial.
Further,
and he watched me narrowly, I didn't seem to be afraid of the cylinders.
"I'll cooperate,"
he said.
For three days there was nothing. The Swami
called me a couple times a day and reported that the cylinders just lay around
his room. I didn't know what to tell him. I recommended he read biographies of
famous mediums. I recommended fasting, and breathing, and contemplating self.
He seemed dubious, but said he'd try it.
On
the morning of the third day, Sara called me on the intercom and told me there
was another Army lieutenant in her office, and another . . . gentleman. I
opened my door and went out to Sara's office to greet them.
The
new lieutenant was no more than the standard output from the same production
line as Lieutenant Murphy, but the wizened little old man he had in tow was
from a different and much rarer matrix. As fast as I had moved, I was none too
soon. The character reached over and tilted up Sara's chin as I was coming
through the door.
"Now
you're a healthy young wench," he said with a leer. "What are you
doing tonight, baby?" The guy was at least eighty years old.
"Hey, you, pop!"
I exclaimed in anger. "Be your age!"
He turned around and looked
me up and down.
"I'm
younger, that way, than you are, right now!" he snapped.
A
disturbance in the outer office kept me from thinking up a retort. There were
some subdued screams, some scuffling of heavy shoes, the sounds of some
running feet as applicants got away. The outer door to Sara's office was flung
open.
Framed in the doorway, breast high, floated
the Swami!
He was sitting, cross-legged, on a hotel
bathmat. From both front corners, where they had been attached by loops of
twine, there peeked Auerbach cylinders. Two more rear cylinders were grasped in
Lieutenant Murphy's strong hands. He was propelling the Swami along, mid air,
in Atlantic City Boardwalk style.
The
Swami looked down at us with aloof disdain, then his eyes focused on the old
man. His glance wavered; he threw a startled and fearful look at the cylinders
holding up his bathmat. They did not fall. A vast relief overspread his face,
and he drew himself erect with more disdain than ever. The old man was not so
aloof.
"Harry
Glotz!" he exclaimed. "Why you . . . you faker! What are you doing in
that getup?"
The
Swami took a casual turn about the room, leaning to one side on his magic
carpet as if banking an airplane.
"Peasant!"
He spat the word out and motioned grandly toward the door. Lieutenant Murphy
pushed him through.
"Why,
that no good bum!" the old man shouted at me. "That no-good from
nowhere! I'll fix him! Thinks he's something, does he? I'll show him! Anything
he can do I can do better!"
His
rage got the better of .him. He rushed through the door, shaking both fists
above his white head, shouting imprecations, threats, and pleading to be shown
how the trick was done, all in the same breath. The new lieutenant cast a
stricken look at us and then sped after his charge.
"Looks as if we're finally
in production," I said to Sara.
'That's
only the second one," she said mournfully. "When you get all six of
them, this joint's sure going to be jumping!"
I
looked out of her window at the steel and concrete walls of the factory. They
were solid, real, secure; they were a symbol of reality, the old reality a man
could understand.
"I
hope you don't mean that literally, Sara," I answered dubiously.
MARIANA
Fritz Leiber
"Mariana"
was selected for the 5th SF Annual from Fantastic, Feb.,
1960.
■ ■■■
Mariana had been living in the big villa and hating the tall pine
trees around it for what seemed like an eternity when she found the secret
panel in the master control panel of the house.
The
secret panel was simply a narrow blank of aluminum—she'd thought of it as room
for more switches if they ever • needed any, perish the thought!—between the
air-conditioning controls and the gravity controls. Above the switches for the
three-dimensional TV but below those for the robot butler and maids.
Jonathan
had told her not to fool with the master control panel while he was in the
city, because she would wreck anything electrical, so when the secret panel
came loose under her aimlessly questing fingers and fell to the solid rock
floor of the patio with a musical twing her
first reaction was fear.
Then
she saw it was only a small blank oblong of sheet aluminum that had fallen and
that in the space it had covered was a column of six little switches. Only the
top one was identified. Tiny glowing letters beside it spelled trees and it was on.
When Jonathan got home from the city that
evening she gathered her courage and told him about it. He was neither
particularly angry nor impressed.
"Of
course there's a switch for the trees,"
he informed her deflatingly, motioning the robot
butler to cut bis steak.
"Didn't
you know they were radio trees? I didn't want to wait twenty-five years for
them and they couldn't grow in this rock anyway. A station in the city
broadcasts a master pine tree and sets like ours pick it up and project it
around homes. It's vulgar but convenient."
After
a bit she asked timidly, "Jonathan, are the radio pine trees ghostly as
you drive through them?"
"Of
course not! They're solid as this house and the rock under it—to the eye and to
the touch too. A person could even climb them. If you ever stirred outside
you'd know these things. The city station transmits pulses of alternating
matter at sixty cycles a second. The science of it is over your head."
She
ventured one more question: "Why did they have the tree switch covered
up?"
"So
you wouldn't monkey with it—same as the fine controls on the TV. And so you
wouldn't get ideas and start changing the trees. It would unsettle me, let me tell you, to come home to oaks one day and birches the next. I
like consistency and I like pines." He looked at them out of the
dining-room picture window and grunted with satisfaction.
She
had been meaning to tell him about hating the pines, but that discouraged her
and she dropped the topic.
About
noon the next day, however, she went to the secret panel and switched off the
pine trees and quickly turned around to watch them.
At
first nothing happened and she was beginning to think that Jonathan was wrong
again, as he so often was though would never admit, but then they began to
waver and specks of pale green light churned across them and then they faded
and were gone, leaving behind only an intolerably bright single point of
light—just as when the TV is switched off. The star hovered motionless for what
seemed a long time, then backed away and raced off toward the horizon.
Now
that the pine trees were out of the way Mariana could see the real landscape.
It was fiat gray rock, endless miles of it, exactly the same as the rock on
which the house was set and which formed the floor of the patio. It was the
same in every direction. One black two-lane road drove straight across
it—nothing more.
She disliked the view
almost at once—it was dreadfully lonely and depressing. She switched the
gravity to moon-normal and danced about dreamily, floating over the
middle-of-the-room bookshelves and the grand piano and even having the robot
maids dance with her, but it did not cheer her. About two o'clock she went to
switch on the pine trees again, as she had intended to do in any case before
Jonathan came home and was furious.
However, she found there had been changes in
the column of six little switches. The trees switch no longer had its glowing name. She
remembered that it had been the top one, but the top one would not turn on
again. She tried to force it from "off" to "on" but it
would not move.
All of the rest of the
afternoon she sat on the steps outside the front door watching the black
two-lane road. Never a car or a person came into view until Jonathan's tan
roadster appeared, seeming at first to hang motionless in the distance and then
to move only like a microscopic snail although she knew he always drove at top
speed—it was one of the reasons she would never get in the car with him.
Jonathan
was not as furious as she had feared. "Your own damn fault for meddling
with it," he said curtly. "Now we'll have to get a man out here.
Dammit, I hate to eat supper looking at nothing but those rocks! Bad enough
driving through them twice a day."
She
asked him haltingly about the barrenness of the landscape and the
absence of neighbors.
"Well,
you wanted to live way
out," he
told her. "You wouldn't ever have known about it if you hadn't turned off
the trees."
"There's
one other thing I've got to bother you with, Jonathan," she said.
"Now the second switch—the one next below—has got a name that glows. It
just says house. It's turned on—I haven't touched it! Do you
suppose . . ."
"I
want to look at this," he said, bounding up from the couch and slamming
his martini-on-the-rocks tumbler down on the tray of the robot maid so that she
rattled. "I bought this house as solid, but there are swindles. Ordinarily
I'd spot a broadcast style in a flash, but they just might have slipped me a
job relayed from some other planet or solar system. Fine thing if me and fifty
other multi-mega-buck men were spotted around in identical houses, each
thinking his was unique."
"But if the house is
based on rock like it is . . ."
"That
would just make it easier for them to pull the trick, you dumb bunny!"
They
reached the master control panel. "There it is," she said helpfully,
jabbing out a finger . . . and hit the house switch.
For
a moment nothing happened, then a white churning ran across the ceiling, the
walls and furniture started to swell and bubble like cold lava, and then they
were alone on a rock table big as three tennis courts. Even the master control
panel was gone. The only thing that was left was a slender rod coming out of
the gray stone at their feet and bearing at the top, like some mechanistic
fruit, a small block with the six switches—that and an intolerably bright star
hanging in the air where the master bedroom had been.
Mariana
pushed frantically at the house switch, but it was unlabeled now and locked
in the "off" position, although she threw her weight at it
stiff-armed.
The
upstairs star sped off like an incendiary bullet, but its last flashbulb glare
showed her Jonathan's face set in lines of fury. He lifted his hands like
talons.
"You little
idiot!" he screamed, coming at her.
"No,
Jonathan, no!" she wailed, backing off, but he kept coming.
She realized that the block of switches had
broken off in her hands. The third switch had a glowing name now: Jonathan. She flipped it.
As
his fingers dug into her bare shoulders they seemed to turn to foam rubber,
then to air. His face and gray flannel suit seethed iridescently, like a
leprous ghost's, then melted and ran. His star, smaller than that of the house
but much closer, seared her eyes. When she opened them again there was nothing
at all left of the star or Jonathan but a dancing dark after-image like a
black tennis ball.
She was alone on an
infinite flat rock plain under the cloudless, star-specked sky. The fourth
switch had its glowing name now: stars.
It was almost dawn by her radium-dialed
wristwatch and she was thoroughly chilled, when she finally decided to switch
off the stars. She did not want to do it—in their slow wheeling across the sky
they were the last sign of orderly reality—but it seemed the only move she
could make.
She
wondered what the fifth switch would say. rocks? air? Or
even... ?
She switched off the stars.
The
Milky Way, arching in all its unalterable glory, began to churn, its component
stars darting about like midges. Soon only one remained, brighter even than
Sirius or Venus —until it jerked back, fading, and darted to infinity.
The fifth switch said doctor and it was not on but off.
An
inexplicable terror welled up in Mariana. She did not even want to touch the
fifth switch. She set the block of switches down on the rock and backed away
from it.
But
she dared not go far in the starless dark. She huddled down and waited for
dawn. From time to time she looked at her watch dial and at the night-light
glow of the switch-label a dozen yards away.
It seemed to be growing
much colder.
She
read her watch dial. It was two hours past sunrise. She remembered they had
taught her in third grade that the sun was just one more star.
She
went back and sat down beside the block of switches and picked it up with a
shudder and flipped the fifth switch.
The
rock grew soft and crisply fragrant under her and lapped up over her legs and
then slowly turned white.
She
was sitting in a hospital bed in a small blue room with a white pin-stripe.
A
sweet, mechanical voice came out of the wall, saying, "You have
interrupted the wish-fulfillment therapy by your own decision. If you now
recognize your sick depression and are willing to accept help, the doctor will
come to you. If not, you are at liberty to return to the wish-fulfillment
therapy and pursue it to its ultimate conclusion."
Mariana
looked down. She still had the block of switches in her hands and the fifth
switch still read doctor.
The
wall said, "I assume from your silence that you will accept treatment. The
doctor will be with you immediately."
The inexplicable terror returned to Mariana
with compulsive intensity.
She switched off the doctor.
She was back in the starless dark. The rocks
had grown very much colder. She could feel icy feathers falling on her
face—snow.
She lifted the block of switches and saw, to
her unutterable relief, that the sixth and last switch now read, in tiny
glowing letters: Mariana.
PLENITUDE
Will Worthington
"Will Worlhingion" is the pseudonym of an author who published
ten stories altogether between 1958—1961. "Plenitude" was selected
for the 5th SF Annual from Fantasy & Science Fiction, October, 1959.
"Why can't we go home now, daddy?" asked Mike, the youngest, and the small tanned face I saw there in the skimpy shade of the olive
tree was mostly a matter of eyes—all else, hair, cheeks, thumb-sized mouth,
jelly-bean body and usually flailing arms and legs, were mere accessories' to
the round, blue, endlessly wondering eyes. ("The Wells of 'Why' "... It would make a poem, I thought, if a poem were needed, and if I wasn't so damned tired. And I also thought,
"Oh, God! It begins. Five years old. No, not quite. Four.")
"Because
Daddy has to finish weeding this row of beans," I said. "We'll go
back to the house in a little while."
I
would go back to the house and then I would follow the path around the rocks to
the hot springs, and there I would peel off what was left of my clothes and I would soak myself in the clear but pungent
water that came bubbling—perfect—from a cleft in the rocks to form a pool in
the hollow of a pothole—also perfect. And while I steeped in the mineral water
I could think about the fish which was soon to be broiling on the fire, and I
could think of Sue turning it, poking at it and sprinkling herbs over it as
though it was the first or perhaps the last fish that would ever be broiled and
eaten by human creatures. She would perform that office with the same total and
unreserved dedication with which, since sun-up, she had scraped deerskin,
picked worms from new cabbage-leaves, gathered
firewood, caulked the walls of the cabin where
the old chinking had fallen away or been chewed or knocked away by other hungry
or merely curious creatures, and otherwise filled in the numberless gaps in the
world—trivial things mostly which would not be noticed and could not become
great things in a man's eyes unless she were to go away or cease to be. I don't
think of this because, for all immediate purposes—there are no others—she is
the first Woman in the world and quite possibly—the last.
"Why
don't we live in the Old House in the valley, Daddy?"
It
is All-Eyes again. Make no mistake about it; there is a kind of connectedness
between the seemingly random questions of very small kids. These are the
problems posed by an C/r-logic which is much closer to the pulse of reality
than are any of the pretentious, involuted systems and the mincing nihilations
and category-juggling of adults. It is we who are confused and half-blinded
with the varieties of special knowledge. But how explain? What good is my
experience to him?
"There
are too many old things in the Old House which don't work," I say, even as
I know that I merely open the floodgates of further questions.
"Don't
the funny men work, Daddy? I want to see the funny men! Daddy, I want..."
The
boy means the robots. I took him down to see the Old House in the valley once
before. He rode on top of my haversack and hung on to my hair with his small
fingers. It was all a lark for him. I had gone to fetch some books— gambling
that there might be a bagful of worthwhile ones that had not been completely
eaten by bugs and mice; and if the jaunt turned out depressing for me, it was
my fault, which is to say the fault of memory and the habit of comparing what
has been with what is—natural, inevitable, unavoidable, but oh, God, just the
same . . . The robots which still stood on their size-thirty metal feet looked
like grinning Mexican mummies. They gave me a bad turn even-though I knew what
they were, and should have known what changes to expect after a long, long
absence from that house, but to the kid they were a delight. Never mind
transphenomenality of rusted surfaces and uselessly dangling wires; never mind
the history of a senile generation.
They
were the funny men. I wish I could leave it at that, but of course I can't. I
hide my hoe in the twigs of the olive tree and pick up Mike. This stops the
questions for a while.
"Let's
go home to Mummy," I say; and also, hoping to hold back the questions
about the Old House long enough to think of some real answers, "Now aren't
you glad we live up here where we can see the
ocean and eagles and hot springs?"
"Yeth,"
says Mike firmly by way of making a querulous and ineffectual old man feel
better about his decision. What a comfort to me the little one is!
I
see smoke coming from the chimney, and when we round the last turn in the path
we see the cabin. Sue waves from the door. She has worked like a squaw since
dawn, and she smiles and waves. I can remember when women would exhaust
themselves talking over the phone and eating bonbons all day and then fear to
smile when their beat husbands came home from their respective
nothing-foundries lest they crack the layers of phony "youthful glow"
on their faces. Not like Sue. Here is Sue with smudges of charcoal on her face
and fish-scales on her leather pants. Her scent is of woodsmoke and of sweat.
There is no artificial scent like this—none more endearing nor more completely
"correct." There was a time when the odor of perspiration would have
been more of a social disaster for a woman than the gummata of tertiary pox.
Even men were touched by this strange phobia.
Sue
sees the question on my face and she knows why my smile is a little perfunctory
and strained.
"Chris . . . ?" I
start to ask finally.
"No.
He took his bow and his sleeping-bag. Muttered something about an eight-point
buck."
We
do not need the venison. If anything has been made
exhaustively and exhaustingly clear to the boy it is that our blessings consist
in large part of what we do not need. But this is not the point, and I know it
is not the point.
"Do you think he'll
ever talk to me again, Sue?"
"Of
course he will." She pulls off my sweaty shirt and hands me a towel.
"You know how twelve is. Everything in technicolor and with the throbbiest
possible background music. Everything drags or jumps or swings or everything is
Endsville or something else which it actually isn't. If it can't be turned into
a drama it doesn't exist. He'll get over it."
I
can think of no apt comment. Sue starts to busy herself with the fire, then
turns back to me.
"You
did the best thing. You did what you had to do, that's all. Go take your bath.
I'm getting hungry."
I
make my way up the path to the hot springs and I am wearing only the towel and
the soles of an ancient pair of sneakers held on with thongs. I am thinking
that the hot water will somehow dissolve the layers of sickly thought that
obscure all the colors of the world from my mind, just as it will rid me of the
day's accretion of grime, but at once I know that I am yielding to a vain and
superstitious hope. I can take no real pleasure in the anticipation of my bath.
When
I emerge from the underbrush and come in sight of the outcroppings of rock
where the springs are, I can see Sato, our nearest neighbor and my oldest
friend, making his way along the path from his valley on the other side of the
mountain. I wave at him, but he does not wave back. I tell myself that he is
concentrating on his feet and simply does not see me, but myself answers back
in much harsher terms. Sato knows what happened when I took my older son to the
City, and he knows why my son has not spoken more than a dozen coherent words
since returning. He knows what I have done, and while it is not in the man's
nature to rebuke another or set himself above another or mouth moral
platitudes, there are limits.
Sato
is some kind of a Buddhist. Only vaguely and imperfectly do I understand what
this implies; not being unnecessarily explicit about itself is certainly a
part of that doctrine. But there is also the injunction against killing. And I
am —notwithstanding every meretricious attempt of my own mind to convert that
fact into something more comfortable —a killer. And so ... I may now contemplate what it will mean not merely to have
lost my older son, but also the priceless, undemanding and yet immeasurably
rewarding friendship of the family in the next valley.
"It
was not intentional," I tell myself as I lower my griminess and weariness
into the hot water. "It was necessary. How else explain why we chose . .
. ?" But it isn't worth a damn. I might as well mumble Tantric formulae.
The water feels lukewarm—used.
I go
on flaying myself in this manner. I return to the house and sit down to supper.
The food I had looked forward to so eagerly tastes like raw fungus or my old
sneakers. Nothing Sue says helps, and I even find myself wishing she would go
to hell with her vitamin-enriched cheerfulness.
On our slope of the mountain the darkness
comes as it must come to a lizard which is suddenly immured in a cigar box.
Still no sign of Chris and so, of course, the pumas are more vocal than they
have been all year. I itemize and savor every disaster that roars, rumbles,
creeps, slithers, stings, crushes or bites: everything from rattlers to
avalanches, and I am sure that one or all of these dire things will befall
Chris before the night is over. I go outside every time I hear a sound—which
is often—and I squint at the top of the ridge and into the valley below. No
Chris.
Sue,
from her bunk, says, "If you don't stop torturing yourself, you'll be in
no condition to do anything if it does become necessary." She is right, of course, which makes me mad as
hell on top of everything else. I lie on my bunk and for the ten-millionth time
reconstruct the whole experience:
We had been hacking at
elder bushes, Chris and I. It had been a wet winter and clearing even enough
land for garden truck out of the encroaching vegetation began to seem like
trying to hold back the sea with trowels. This problem and the gloomy knowledge
that we had about one hatful of beans left in the cabin had conspired to
produce a mood in which nothing but hemlock could grow. And I'd about had it
with the questions. Chris had started the "Why" routine at about the
same age as little Mike, but the questions, instead of leveling off as the boy
began to exercise his own powers of observation and deduction, merely became
more involved and challenging.
The worst thing about this
was that I could not abdicate: other parents in other times could fluff off the
questions of their kids with such hopeless and worthless judgments as
"Well, that's how things are," thereby
implying that both the questioner and the questioned are standing passively at
the dead end of a chain of historical cause, or are existen-tially trapped in
the eye of a storm of supernal origin, or are at the nexus of a flock of
processes arising out of the choices of too many other agencies to pinpoint and
blame definitively ... our life, on the other hand, was clearly and in every significant particular
our own baby. It did not merely proceed out of one particular historical
choice, complete with foreseeable contingencies, but was an entire fabric of
choices—ours.
Here was total
responsibility, complete with crowding elder bushes, cold rain, chiggers, rattlers,
bone-weariness and mud. I had elected to live it— even to impose it upon my
progeny—and I was prepared for its hardships, but what galled me was having to
justify it.
"The people in the City don't have to do
this, do they?" ("This" is grubbing
out elder bushes, and he is right. The people in the City do not have to do This. They do not have to hunt, fish, gather or raise their own food. They do
not have to build their own cabins, carry their own water from springs or
fashion their own clothes from the skins of beautiful, murdered—by me—animals.
They do not have to perspire. One of these days I will have to explain that
they do not even have to sleep with their own wives. That of itself should be the answer of answers, but twelve is not yet ready;
twelve cares about things with wheels, things which spin, roar, roll, fly,
explode, exude noise and stench. Would that twelve were fourteen!)
In
the meantime it is dig—hack—heave;
dig—hack— heave! "Come
on, Chris! It isn't sundown yet."
"Why
couldn't we bring an old tractor up here in pieces and put it together and fix
it up and find oil and . . ." (I try to explain for the fifty-millionth
time that you do not simply "fix up" something which is the
outgrowth of an enormous Organization of interdependent Organizations, the
fruit of a dead tree, as it were. The wheel will not be turned back. The kid
distrusts abstractions and generalities, and I don't blame him, but God I'm
tired!) "Let's just clear off this corner by the olive tree, Chris, and
then we'll knock off for the day."
"Are we better than the City-People?"
(This
one hit a nerve. "Better" is a judgment made by people after the fact
of their own decisions. Or there isn't any "Better." As for the
Recalcitrants, of which vague class of living creatures we are members, they
were and are certainly both more and less something than the others were —the City people—the
ones who elected to Go Along with the Organization. Of all the original
Recalcitrant families, I would guess that not ten per cent are now alive. I
would if I had any use for statistics. If these people had something in common,
you would have to go light-years away to find a name for it. I think it was a
common lack of something —a disease perhaps. Future generations will take
credit for it and refer to their origins as Fine Old Stock. I think most of
them were crazy. I am glad they were, but most of them were just weird.
Southern California. I haVe told Chris about the Peters family. They were going
to make it on nothing but papaya juice and stewed grass augmented by East
Indian breathing exercises. Poor squittered-out souls! Their corpses were like
balsa wood. Better? What is Better? Grandfather was going to live on stellar
emanations and devote his energies to whittling statues out of fallen redwoods.
Thank Nature his stomach had other ideas! And God I'm tired and fed up!)
"Dammit,
boy! Tomorrow I'll take
you to the City and let you
answer your own questions!"
And
I did. Sue protested and old Sato just gave me that look which said, "I'm
not saying anything," but I did.
The
journey to the City is necessarily one which goes from bad to worse. As a deer
and a man in the wilderness look for downward paths and lush places if they
would find a river, the signs which lead to the centers of
human civilization are equally recognizable.
You
look for ugliness and senselessness. It is that simple. Look for places which
have been overlaid with mortar so that nothing can grow or change at its will.
Look for things which have been fashioned at great expense of time and energy
and then discarded. Look for tin and peeling paint, for rusted metal, broken
neon tubing, drifts and drifts of discarded containers—cans, bottles, papers.
Look for flies and let your nose lead you where it would rather not go.
What
is the difference between the burrow of a fox
and a huge sheet-metal hand which bears the legend,
in peeling, garish paint: THIS WAY TO PERPETUAL PARMENI-
DEAN
PALACES . . . ? I do not know why one is better than the other, or if it is. I know that present purposes— purposes of intellect—lead one way,
and intuition leads the other. So we resist intuition, and the path of greatest
re-sistence leads us from one vast, crumbling, frequently stinking artifact or
monument to another.
Chris
is alternately nauseated and thrilled. He wants to stay in the palatial
abandoned houses in the outskirts, but I say "no." For one thing, the
rats look like Doberman Pinschers and for another . . . well, never mind what
it is that repels me.
Much
of the city looks grand until we come close enough to see where cement and
plaster, paint and plastic have sloughed away to reveal ruptured tubes and
wires which gleam where their insulation has rotted away, and which are
connected to nothing with any life in it. We follow a monorail track which is
a silver thread from a distance, but which has a continuous ridge of rust and
bird droppings along its upper surface as far as the eye can see. We see more
of the signs which point to the PERPETUAL PARMENIDEAN PALACES, and we follow
them, giving our tormented intuition a rest even while for our eyes and our
spirits there is no relief.
When
we first encounter life we are not sure that it is life.
"They look like huge grapes!"
exclaims Chris when we find them, clustered about a central tower in a huge
sunken place like a stadium. The P. P. Palaces are indeed like huge
grapes—reddish, semitransparent, about fifteen feet in diameter, or perhaps
twenty. I am not used to measuring spaces in such terms any more. The globes
are connected to the central tower, or stem, by means of thick cables ... their umbilicals. A high, wire-mesh
fence surrounds the area, but here and there the rust has done its work in
spite of zinc coating on the wire. With the corn-knife I have brought to defend
us from the rats and God knows what, I open a place in the fence. We are
trespassing, and we know this, but we have come this far.
"Where
are the people?" asks Chris, and I see that he looks pale. He has asked
the question reluctantly, as though preferring no answer. I give none. We come
close to one of the spheres, feeling that we do the wrong thing and doing it
anyway. I see our objective and I point. It is a family of them, dimly visible
like floating plants in an un-cleaned aquarium. It is their frightened eyes we
first see.
I do
not know very much about the spheres except from hearsay and dim memory. The
contents, including the occupants, are seen only dimly, I know, because the
outer skins of the thing are filled with a self-replemshing liquid nutrient
which requires the action of the sun and is augmented by the waste-products of
the occupants. We look closer, moving so that the sun is directly behind the
sphere, revealing its contents in sharper outline.
"Those
are not real people," says Chris. Now he looks a little sick. "What
are all those tubes and wires for if they're real people? Are they robots or
dolls or what?"
I do
not know the purpose of all the tubes and wires myself. I do know that some
are connected with veins in their arms and legs, others are nutrient enemata
and for collection of body wastes, still others are only mechanical tentacles
which support and endlessly fondle and caress. I know that the wires leading to
the metal caps on their heads are part of an invention more voracious and
terrible than the ancient television—direct stimulation of certain areas of the
brain, a constant running up and down the diapason of pleasurable sensation,
controlled by a sort of electronic kaleidoscope.
My
imagination stops about here. It would be the ultimate artificiality, with
nothing of reality about it save endless variation. Of senselessness I will
not think. I do not know if they see constantly shifting masses or motes of
color, or smell exotic perfumes, or hear unending and constantly swelling
music. I think not. I doubt that they even experience anything so immediate and
yet so amorphous as the surge and recession of orgasm or the gratification of
thirst being quenched. It would be stimulation without real stimulus; ultimate
removal from reality. I decide not to speak of this to Chris. He has had
enough. He has seen the wires and the tubes.
I
have never sprung such abstractions as "Dignity" upon the boy. What
good are such absolutes on a mountainside? If there is Dignity in grubbing out
weeds and planting beans, those pursuits must be more dignified than something, because, like all words, it is a meaningless wisp of lint
once removed from its relativistic fabric. The word does not exist until he
invents it himself. The hoe and the rocky soil or the nutrient enema and the
electronic ecstasy: He must judge for himself. That is why I have brought him
here.
"Let's get away from
here," he says. "Let's go home!"
"Good,"
I say, but even as I say it I can see that the largest of the pallid creatures
inside the "grape" is doing something—I cannot tell what—and to my
surprise it seems capable of enough awareness of us to become alarmed. What
frightening creatures we must be—dirty, leather clothes with patches of dried
animal blood on them, my beard and the small-boy grime of Chris! Removed as I
am from these helpless aquarium creatures, I cannot blame them. But my
compassion was a short-lived thing. Chris screamed.
I
turned in time to see what can only be described as a huge metal scorpion
rushing at Chris with its tail lashing, its fore-claws snapping like pruning
shears and red lights flashing angrily where its eyes should have been. A guard
robot, of course. Why I had not foreseen such a thing I will never know. I
supposed at the time that the creature inside the sphere had alerted it.
The
tin scorpion may have been a match for the reactions and the muscles of less
primitive, more "civilized" men than ourselves, or the creators of
the Perpetual Par-menidean Palaces had simply not foreseen barbarians with
heavy corn-knives. I knocked Chris out of the way and dispatched the tin bug,
snipping off its tail-stinger with a lucky slash of the corn-knife and jumping
up and down on its thorax until all its appendages were still.
When
the reaction set in, I had to attack something else. I offer no other
justification for what I did. We were the intruders—the invading barbarians.
All the creatures in the spheres wanted was their security. The man in the
sphere set the scorpion on us, but he was protecting his family. I can see it
that way now. I wish I couldn't. I wish I was one of those people who can
always contrive to have been Right.
I saw
the frightened eyes of the things inside the sphere, and I reacted to it as a
predatory animal reacts to the scent of urea in the sweat of a lesser animal.
And they had menaced my son with a hideous machine in order to be absolutely secure! If I reasoned at all, it was along this line.
The
corn-knife was not very sharp, but the skin of the sphere parted with
disgusting ease. I heard Chris scream, "No! Dad! No!" '. . . but I
kept hacking. We were nearly engulfed in the pinkish, albuminous nutritive which
gushed from the ruptured sac. I can still smell it.
The
creatures inside were more terrible to see in the open air than they had been
behind their protective layers of plastic material. They were dead white and
they looked to be soft, although they must have had normal human skeletons.
Their struggles were blind, pointless and feeble, like those of some kind of
larvae found under dead wood, and the largest made a barely audible mewing
sound as it groped about in search of what I cannot imagine.
I
heard Chris retching violently, but could not tear my attention away from the
spectacle. The sphere now looked like some huge coelenterate which had been
halved for study in the laboratory, and the hoselike tentacles still moved like
groping cilia.
The
agony of the creatures in the "grape" (I cannot think of them as People) when they were first exposed
to unfiltered, unprocessed air and sunlight, when the wires and tubes were torn
from them, and especially when the metal caps on their heads fell off in their
panicky struggles and the whole universe of chilly external reality rushed in
upon them at once, is beyond my imagining; and perhaps this is merciful. This
and the fact that they lay in the stillness of death after only a very few
minutes in the open air.
Memory
is merciful too in its imperfection. All I remember of our homeward journey is
the silence of it.
"Wake up! We have company, old
man!"
It is Sue shaking me. Somehow I did sleep—in
spite of Chris and in spite of the persistent memory. It must be midmorning. I
swing my feet down and scrub at my gritty eyes. Voices outside. Cheerful. How
cheerful?
It is Sato and he has his old horse hitched
to a crude travois of willow poles. It is Sato and his wife and three kids and
my son Chris. There trussed up on the travois is the biggest buck I have seen
in ten years, its neck transfixed with an arrow. A perfect shot and one that
could not have been scored without the most careful and skillful stalking. I
remember teaching him that only a bad hunter ...
a heedless and cruel one . . . would
risk a distant shot with a bow.
Chris
is grinning and looking sheepish. Sato's daughter is there, which accounts for
the look of benign idiocy. I was wondering when he would notice. Then he sees
me standing in the door of the cabin and his face takes on about ten years of
gravity and thought, but this is not for the benefit of the teen-age female.
Little Mike is clawing at Chris and asking why he went away like that and why he
went hunting without Daddy, and several other whys which Chris ignores. His answer is for his old man:
"I'm
sorry, Dad. I wasn't mad at you . . . just sort of crazy. Had to do . . . this.
. . ." He points at the deer. "Anyhow, I'm back."
"And I'm glad," I
managed.
"Dad, those elder
bushes .. ."
"To hell with
them," say I. "Wednesday is soon enough."
Sato
moves in grinning, and just in time to relieve the awkwardness. "Dressed
out this buck and carried it down the mountain by himself." I think of
mountain lions. "He was about pooped when I found him in a pasture."
Sue
holds open the cabin door and the Satos file in. Himself first, carrying a jug
of wine, then Mrs. Sato, grinning greetings. She has never mastered English.
It has not been necessary.
I
drag up what pass for chairs. Made them myself. We begin talking about weeds
and beans, and weather, bugs and the condition of fruit trees. It is Sato who
has steered the conversation into these familiar ways, bless his knowing heart.
He uncorks the wine. Sue and Mrs. Sato, meanwhile, are carrying on one of their
lively conversations. Someday I will listen to them, but I doubt that I will
ever learn how they communicate ...
or what. Women.
I
can hear Chris outside talking to Yuki, Sato's daughter. He is not boasting
about the deer; he is telling her about the fight with the tin scorpion and the
grape-people.
"Are they blind ... the grape-people?" the girl asks.
"Heck
no," says Chris. "At least one of them wasn't. One of them sicced the
robot bug on us. They were going to kill us. And so, Dad did what he had to do.. .."
I don't hear the details over the
interjections of Yuki and little Mike, but I can imagine they are as pungent as the teen-age powers of physiological
description allow. I hear Yuki exclaim, "Oh how utterly germy!" and another language problem occurs to me.
How can kids who have never hung around a drugstore still manage to evolve
languages of their own . . . characteristically adolescent dialects? It is one
more mystery which I shall never solve. I hear little Mike asking for reasons
and causes with his favorite word. "Why, Chris?"
"I'll
explain it when you get older," says Chris, and oddly it doesn't sound
ridiculous.
Sato pours a giant-size
dollop of wine in each tumbler.
"What's the
occasion?" I ask.
Sato studies the wine critically, holding the
glass so the light from the door shines through. "It's Tuesday," he
says.
DAY AT
THE BEACH
Carol Emshwiller
"Day at the Beach", originally
published in Fantasy
& Science Fiction, August,
1959, was reprinted in the 5lh SF Annual,
and in the British anthology. The ABC of Science Fiction (1966).
■ ■■■
"It's Saturday,"
the absolutely hairless woman said, and she pulled at her frayed, green
kerchief to make sure it covered her head. "I
sometimes forget to keep
track of the days, but I marked three more off on the calendar because
I think that's how many I forgot, so this must be Saturday."
Her name was Myra and she had neither
eyebrows nor lashes nor even a faint, transparent down along her cheeks. Once
she had had long, black hair, but now, looking at her pink, bare face, one
would guess she had been a redhead.
Her equally hairless
husband, Ben, sprawled at the kitchen table waiting for breakfast. He wore red
plaid Bermuda shorts, rather faded, and a tee shirt with a large hole under the
arm. His skull curved above his staring eyes more naked-seeming than hers
because he wore no kerchief or hat.
"We used to always go out on
Saturdays," she said, and she put a bowl of oatmeal at the side of the
table in front of a youth chair.
Then she put the biggest bowl between her
husband's elbows.
"I
have to mow the lawn this
morning," he said. "All the more so if it's Saturday."
She went on as if she hadn't heard. "A day like today
we'd go to the beach. I forget a lot of
things, but I remember that."
"If I were you, I just wouldn't think
about it." Ben's empty eyes finally focused on the youth chair and he
turned then to the open window behind him and yelled, "Littleboy,
Littleboy," making the sound run together all L's and Y. "Hey, it's
breakfast, Boy," and under his breath he said, "He won't come."
"But I do think about it. I remember hot dogs and clam chowder and how cool it was
days like this. I don't suppose I even have a bathing suit around any
more."
"It wouldn't be like it used to be."
"Oh, the sea's the same. That's one
thing sure. I wonder if the boardwalk's still there."
"Hah," he said. "I don't have
to see it to know it's all gone for firewood. It's been four winters now."
She sat down, put her elbows on the table and
stared at her bowl. "Oatmeal," she said, putting in that one word
everything she felt about the beach and wanting to go there.
"It's not that I don't want to do better
for you," Ben said. He touched her arm with the tips of his fingers for
just a moment. "I wish I could. And I wish I could have hung on to that
corned beef hash last time, but it was heavy and I had to run and there was a
fight on the train and I lost the sugar too. I wonder which bastard has it
now."
"I know how hard you try, Ben. I do.
It's just sometimes everything comes on you at once, especially when it's a
Saturday like this. Having to get water way down the block and that only when
there's electricity to run the pump, and this oatmeal; sometimes it's just once
too often, and then, most of all, you commuting in all that danger to get food."
"I make out. I'm not the smallest one on that train."
"God, I think that every day. Thank God,
I say to myself, or where would we be now. Dead of starvation that's
where."
She watched him leaning low over his bowl,
pushing his lips out and making a sucking sound. Even now she was still
surprised to see how long and naked his skull arched,
276
Carol Ensbwiller
and
she had an impulse, seeing it there so bare and ugly and thinking of the
commuting, to cover it gently with her two hands, to cup it and make her hands
do for his hair; but she only smoothed at her kerchief again to make sure it
covered her own baldness.
"Is it living, though?
Is it living, staying home all the time, hiding like, in this house? Maybe it's
the rest of them, the dead ones, that are lucky. It's pretty sad when a person
can't even go to the beach on a Saturday."
She was thinking the one thing she didn't
want to do most of all was to hurt him. No, she told herself inside, sternly.
Stop it right now. Be silent for once and eat, and, like Ben says, don't think;
but she was caught up in it somehow and she said, "You know, Littleboy
never did go to the beach yet, not even once, and it's only nine miles
down," and she knew it would hurt him.
"Where is Littleboy?" he said and
yelled again out the window. "He just roams."
"It isn't as if there were cars to worry
about any more, and have you seen how fast he is and how he climbs so good for
three and a half? Besides, what can you do when he gets up so early?"
He was finished eating now and he got up and
dipped a cup of water from the large pan on the stove and drank it. "I'll
take a look," he said. "He won't come when you call."
She began to eat finally,
watching him out the kitchen window and listening to him calling. Seeing him
hunched forward and squinting because he had worn glasses before and his last
pair had been broken a year ago. Not in a fight, because he was careful not to
wear them commuting even then, when it wasn't quite so bad. It was Littleboy
who had done it, climbed up and got them himself from the very top drawer, and
he was a whole year younger. Next thing she knew they were on the floor,
broken.
Ben disappeared out of range of the window
and Littleboy came darting in as though he had been huddling by the door
behind the arbor vitae all the time.
He was the opposite of his big, pink and
hairless parents, with thick and fine black hair growing low over his forehead
and extending down the back of his neck so far that she always wondered if it
ended where hair used to end before, or whether it grew too far down. He was
thin and small for his age, but strong-looking and wiry with long arms and
legs. He had a pale, olive skin, wide, blunt features and a wary stare, and he
looked at her now, waiting to see what she would do.
She only sighed, lifted him and put him
in his youth chair and kissed his firm, warm cheek, thinking, what beautiful
hair, and wishing she knew how to cut it better so he would look neat.
"We don't have any
more sugar," she said, "but I saved you some raisins," and she
took down a box and sprinkled some on his cereal.
Then she went to the door
and called, "He's here, Ben. He's here." And in a softer voice she
said, "The pixy." She heard Ben answer with a whistle and she turned
back to the kitchen to find Littleboy's oatmeal on the floor in a lopsided oval
lump, and him, still looking at her with wise and wary brown eyes.
She knelt down first, and
spooned most of it back into the bowl. Then she picked him up rather roughly,
but there was gentleness to the roughness, too. She pulled at the elastic
topped jeans and gave him two hard, satisfying slaps on bare buttocks. "It
isn't as if we had food to waste," she said, noticing the down that grew
along his backbone and wondering if that was the way the three year olds had
been before.
He made an Aaa, Aaa, sound, but didn't cry, and after that she
picked him up and held him so that he nuzzled into her neck in the way
she liked. "Aaa," he said again, more softly, and bit her just above
the collar bone.
She dropped him down, letting him kind of
slide with her arms still around him. It hurt and she could see there was a
shallow, half-inch piece bitten right out.
"He bit me again," she shouted,
hearing Ben at the door. "He bit me. A real piece out even, and look, he
has it in his mouth still."
"God, what a..."
"Don't hurt him. I already slapped him
good for the floor and three is a hard age." She pulled at Ben's arm.
"It says so in the books. Three is hard, it says." But she remembered
it really said that three was a beginning to be cooperative age.
He let go and Littleboy ran out of the
kitchen back toward the bedrooms.
She
took a deep breath. "I've just got to get out of this house. I mean really
away."
She
sat down and let him wash the place and cross two bandaids over it.
"Do you think we could go? Do you think we could go just one more time
with a blanket and a picnic lunch? I've just got to do something."
"All
right. All right. You wear the wrench in your belt and I'll wear the hammer,
and we'll risk taking the car."
She spent twenty minutes
looking for bathing suits and not finding them, and then she stopped because
she knew it didn't really matter, there probably wouldn't be anyone there.
The picnic was simple
enough. She gathered it together in five minutes, a precious can of tuna fish
and hard, homemade biscuits baked the evening before when the electricity had
come on for a while, and shriveled, worm-eaten apples, picked from neighboring
trees and hoarded all winter in another house that had a cellar.
She heard Ben banging about in the garage,
measuring out gas from his cache of cans, ten miles' worth to put in the car
and ten miles' worth in a can to carry along and hide someplace for the trip
back.
Now that he had decided they would go, her
mind began to be full of what-ifs. Still, she thought, she would not change her mind. Surely once in four years was not too often to risk
going to the beach. She had thought about it all last year too, and now she was
going and she would enjoy it.
She gave Littleboy an apple to keep him busy
and she packed the lunch in the basket, all the time pressing her lips tight
together, and she said to herself that she was not going to think of any more what-ifs, and she was going to have a good time.
Ben had switched after the war from the
big-finned Dodge to a small and rattly European car. They fitted into it
cozily, the lunch in back with the army blanket and a pail and shovel for
playing in the sand, and Littleboy in front on her lap, his hair brushing her
cheek as he turned, looking out.
They started out on the empty road.
"Remember how it was before on a weekend?" she said, and laughed.
"Bumper to bumper, they called it We didn't like it then."
A
little way down they passed an old person on a bicycle, in jeans and a bright
shirt with the tail out. They couldn't tell if it was a man or a woman, but the
person smiled and they waved and called, "Aaa."
The
sun was hot, but as they neared the beach there began to be a breeze and she
could smell the sea. She began to feel as she had the very first time she had
seen it. She had been born in Ohio and she was twelve before she had taken a trip
and come out on the wide, flat sunny sands and smelled this smell.
She
held Littleboy tight though it made him squirm, and she leaned against Ben's
shoulder. "Oh, it's going to be fun!" she said. "Littleboy,
you're going to see the sea. Look, darling, keep watching, and smell. It's
delicious." And Littleboy squirmed until she let go again.
Then,
at last, there was the sea, and it was exactly
as it had always been, huge and sparkling and making a sound like . .. no, drowning out the noises of wars. Like the black sky with
stars, or the cold and stolid moon, it dwarfed even what had happened.
They
passed the long, brick bathhouses, looking about as they always had, but the
boardwalks between were gone, as Ben had said, not a stick left of them.
"Let's stop at the
main bathhouse."
"No,"
Ben said. "We better keep away from those places. You can't tell who's in
there. I'm going way down beyond."
She
was glad, really, especially because at the last bathhouse she thought she saw
a dark figure duck behind the wall.
They
went down another mile or so, then drove the car off behind some stunted trees
and bushes.
"Nothing's
going to spoil this Saturday," she said, pulling out the picnic things,
"just nothing. Come, Littleboy." She kicked off her shoes and started
running for the beach, the basket bouncing against her knee.
Littleboy
slipped out of his roomy sneakers easily and scampered after her. "You can
take your clothes off," she told him. "There's nobody here at
all."
When Ben came, later, after hiding the gas,
she was settled, flat on the blanket in old red shorts and a halter, and still
the same green kerchief, and Littleboy, brown and naked, splashed with his pail
in the shallow water, the wetness bringing out the hairs along his back.
"Look,"
she said, "nobody as far as you can see and you can see so far. It gives
you a different feeling from home. You know there are people here and there in
the houses, but here, it's like we were the only ones, and here it doesn't even
matter. Like Adam and Eve, we are, just you and me and our baby."
He
lay on his stomach next to her. "Nice breeze," he said.
Shoulder
to shoulder they watched the waves and the gulls and Littleboy, and later they
splashed in the surf and then ate the lunch and lay watching again, lazy, on
their stomachs. And after a while she turned on her back to see his face.
"With the sea it doesn't matter at all," she said and she put her arm
across his shoulder. "And we're just part of everything, the wind and the
earth and the sea too, my Adam."
"Eve," he said and smiled and
kissed her and it was a longer kiss than they had meant. "Myra.
Myra." "There's nobody but us."
She
sat up. "I don't even know a doctor since Press Smith was killed by those
robbing kids and I'd be scared."
"We'll
find one. Besides, you didn't have any trouble. It's been so damn long."
She pulled away from his arm. "And I love you. And Littleboy, he'll be way
over four by the time we'd have another one."
She
stood up and stretched and then looked down the beach and Ben put a hand around
her ankle. She looked down the other way. "Somebody's coming," she
said, and then he got up too.
Far
down, walking in a business-like way on the hard, damp part of the sand, three
men were coming toward them.
"You
got your wrench?" Ben asked. "Put it just under the blanket and sit
down by it, but keep your knees under you."
He
put his tee shirt back on, leaving it hanging out, and he hooked the hammer
under his belt in back, the top covered by the shirt. Then he stood and waited
for them to come.
They
were ail three bald and shirtless. Two wore jeans cut off at the knees and
thick belts, and the other had checked shorts and a red leather cap and a
pistol stuck in his belt in the middle of the front at the buckle. He was
older. The others looked like kids and they held back as they neared and let
the older one come up alone. He was a small man, but looked tough, "You
got gas," he said, a flat-voiced statement of fact.
"Just enough to get
home."
"I
don't mean right here. You got gas at home is what I mean."
Myra
sat stiffly, her hand on the blanket on top of where the wrench was. Ben was a
little in front of her and she could see his curving, forward-sloping shoulders
and the lump of the hammer-head at the small of his back. If he stood up
straight, she thought, and held his shoulders like they ought to be, he would
look broad and even taller and he would show that little man, but the other had
a pistol. Her eyes kept coming back to its shining black.
Ben
took a step forward. "Don't move," the little man said. He shifted
his weight to one leg, looking relaxed, and put his hand on his hip near the
pistol. "Where you got the gas to get you home? Maybe we'll come with you
and you might lend us a little of that gas you got there at your house. Where'd
you hide the stuff to get you back, or I'll let my boys play a bit with your
little one and you might not like it."
Littleboy,
she saw, had edged down, away from them, and he crouched now, watching with his
wide-eyed stare. She could see the tense, stringy muscles along his arms and
legs and he reminded her of gibbons she had seen at the zoo long ago. His poor
little face looks old, she thought, too old for three years. Her fingers closed
over the blanket-covered wrench. They'd better not hurt Littleboy.
She
heard her husband say, "I don't know." "Oh, Ben," she said,
"oh, Ben."
The
man made a motion and the two youths started out, but Littleboy had started
first, she saw. She pulled at her wrench and then had to stop and fumble with
the blanket, and it took a long time because she kept her eyes on Little-boy
and the two others chasing.
She
heard a shout and a grunt beside her. "Oh, Ben," she said again, and
turned, but it was Ben on top attacking the other, and the small man was trying
to use his pistol as a club but he had hold of the wrong end for that, and Ben
had the hammer and he was much bigger.
He
was finished in a minute. She watched, empty-eyed, the whole of it, holding the
wrench in a white-knuckled hand in case he needed her.
Afterward,
he moved from the body into a crouching run, hammer in one hand and pistol, by
the barrel, in the other. "You stay here," he shouted back.
She
looked at the sea a few minutes, and listened to it, but her own feelings seemed
more important than the stoic sea now. She turned and followed, walking along
the marks where the feet had swept at the soft sand.
Where
the bushes began she saw him loping back. "What happened?"
"They
ran off when they saw me after them with the other guy's gun. No bullets
though. You'll have to help look now."
"He's lost!"
"He
won't come when you call. We'll just have to look. He could be way out. I'll
try that and you stay close and look here. The gas is buried under that bush
there, if you need it."
"We've
got to find him, Ben. He doesn't know his way home from here."
He
came to her and kissed her and held her firmly across the shoulders with one
arm. She could feel his muscles bunch into her neck as hard almost as the head
of his hammer that pressed against her arm. She remembered a time four years
ago when his embrace had been soft and comfortable. He had had hair then, but
he had been quite fat, and now he was hard and bald, having gained something
and lost something.
He
turned and started off, but looked back and she smiled and nodded to show him
she felt better from his arm around her and the kiss.
I would die if anything happened and we would lose
Littleboy,
she thought, but mostly I would hate to lose Ben. Then the world would
really be lost altogether, and everything would be ended.
She
looked, calling in a whisper, knowing she had to peer under each bush and watch
behind and ahead for scampering things. He's so small when he huddles into a
ball and he can sit so still. Sometimes I wish there was another three-year-old
around to judge him by. I forget so much about how it used to be, before.
Sometimes I just wonder about him.
"Littleboy,
Littleboy. Mommy wants you," she called softly. "Come. There's still
time to play in the sand and there are apples left." She leaned forward,
and her hand reached to touch the bushes.
Later
the breeze began to cool and a few clouds gathered. She shivered in just her
shorts and halter, but it was mostly an inner coldness. She felt she had
circled, hunting, for well over an hour, but she had no watch, and at a time
like this she wasn't sure of her judgment. Still, the sun seemed low. They
should go home soon. She kept watching now, too, for silhouettes of people who
might not be Ben or Littleboy, and she probed the
bushes with her wrench with less care. Every now and then she went back to look
at the blanket and the basket and the pail and shovel, lying alone and far from
the water, and the body there, with the red leather cap beside it.
And
then, when she came back another time to see if all the things were still
there, undisturbed, she saw a tall, two-headed seeming monster walking briskly
down the beach, and one head, bouncing directly over the other one, had hair
and was Littleboy's.
The
sunset was just beginning. The rosy glow deepened as they neared her and
changed the colors of everything. The red plaid of Ben's shorts seemed more
emphatic. The sand turned orangeish. She ran to meet them, laughing and
splashing her feet in the shallow water, and she came up and held Ben tight
around the waist and Littleboy said, "Aaa."
"We'll
be home before dark," she said. "There's even time for one last
splash."
They packed up finally
while Littleboy circled the body
by the blanket, touching it sometimes until
Ben slapped him for it and he went off and sat down and made little cat sounds
to himself.
He
fell asleep in her lap on the way home, lying forward against her with his head
at her neck the way she liked. The sunset was deep, with reds and purples.
She
leaned against Ben. "The beach always makes you tired," she said.
"I remember that from before too. I'll be able to sleep tonight."
They
drove silently along the wide empty parkway. The car had no lights, but that
didn't matter.
"We
did have a good day after all," she said. "I feel renewed."
"Good," he said.
It
was just dark as they drove up to the house. Ben stopped the car and they sat a
moment and held hands before moving to get the things out.
"We
had a good day," she said again. "And Littleboy saw the sea."
She put her hand on the sleeping boy's hair, gently so as not to disturb him
and then she yawned. "I wonder if it really was Saturday."
LET'S BE
FRANK
Brian W. Aldiss
Brian W. Aldiss is the author of some 20 or more books in England and America, and
editor of half a dozen anthologies, as well as a book reviewer. Literary Editor
of the Oxford Mail,
and co-editor (with Harry
Harrison) of Ihe critical journal, S. F. Horizons.
Born
in England in 1925, Aldiss had a tour of Asia with the Army during World War
II, and a lour of Yugoslavia, with his wife, in 1965; they now live just
outside Oxford in what is certainly the only thatched cottage in England with
central heating.
His
first story was published in 1954; in 1955, his first book. The Brightfount Diaries, came out, and he was also in his first
anthology, as author of the prize-winning story in a London Observer contest.
His
first U.S. publication was in 1958; in 1959, there were two novels and a
collection, and there have been one or two books a year since. His 1965 novella, "The Saliva Tree" (title story
of a 1966 Faber collection), won a Science Fiction Writers of America Nebula
Award; and he took a "Hugo" in 1961 for "Hothouse" (part of
the novel of that title, in England—The Long Afternoon of the Earth in the U.S.). His last U.S. book was Who Can Replace a Man? (Harcourt, 1966); a new novel, Cryptozoic, will be out soon from Doubleday.
"Let's
Be Frank", reprinted in the 3rd Annual from Science Fantasy, June, 1957, was Aldiss' first hardcover
publication in the U.S.; it also appears in The ABC of Science Fiction. Three other Annuals contained Aldiss stories:
"Ten-Storey Jigsaw" in the 4th, "Old Hundredth" the 6th,
and "Scarfe's World" in the 11th.
Bill
Four years after
pretty little Anne Boleyn
was executed in the Tower of London, a child was born into the Gladwebb
family—an unusual child.
That
morning, four people stood waiting in the draughty antechamber to milady's
bedroom, where the confinement
was taking place—her mother, an aunt, a
sister-in-law and a page. The husband, young Sir Frank Gladwebb, was not
present; he was out hunting. At length the midwife bustled out to the four in
the antechamber and announced that the Almighty (who had recently become a
Protestant) had seen fit to bless milady with a son.
"Why,
then, do we not hear the child crying, woman?" milady's mother, Cynthia
Chinfont St. Giles, demanded, striding into the room to her daughter. There the
reason for the child's silence became obvious: it was asleep.
It remained in the
"sleep" for nineteen years.
Young
Sir Frank was not a patient man; he suffered, in an ambitious age, from
ambition, and anything which stood between him and his advancement got short
shrift. Returning from the hunt to find his first-born comatose, he was not
pleased. The situation, however, was remedied by the birth of a second son in
the next year, and of three more children in the four years thereafter. All of
these offspring were excessively normal, the boy taking Holy Orders and
becoming eventually the Abbot of St. Duckwirt, where simony supplemented an
already generous income.
The
sleeping child grew as it slept. It stirred in its sleep, sometimes it yawned,
it accepted the bottle. Sir Frank kept it in an obscure room in the manor,
appointing an old harridan called Nan to attend it. In moments of rage, or when
he was in his cups, Sir Frank would swear to run a sword through the child; yet
the words were idle, as those about him soon perceived. There was a strange
bond between Sir Frank and the sleeping child. Though he visited it rarely, he
never forgot it.
On
the child's third birthday, he went up to see it. It lay in the center of a
four-poster, its face calm. With an impulse of tenderness, Sir Frank picked it
up, cradling it, limp and helpless, in his arms.
"It's
a lovely lad, sire," Nan commented. And at that moment the' sleeping child
opened its eyes and appeared to focus them on its father. With a cry, Sir Frank
staggered back dizzily, overwhelmed by an indescribable sensation. He sprawled
on the bed, holding the child tightly to keep it from harm. When the giddy
feeling had gone, he looked and found the child's eyes shut again, and so they
remained for a long while.
The Tudor springs and winters passed, the
sleeping child experiencing none of them. He grew to be a handsome young boy,
and a manservant was engaged for him; still his eyes never opened, except on
the rare occasions when his father—now engrossed in the affairs of court—came
to see him. Because of the weakness which took him at these times, Sir Frank
saw to it that they were few.
Good
King Harry died, the succession passed to women and weaklings, Sir Frank came
under the patronage of Robert Devereaux, Earl of Essex. And in the year of the
coronation of Elizabeth, the sleeping child awoke.
Sir
Frank, now a prosperous forty-one, had gone in to see his first-born for the
first time in thirty months. On the four-poster lay a handsome, pale youth of
nineteen, his straggling growth of beard the very shade of his father's more
luxuriant crop. The manservant was out of the room.
Strangely
perturbed, as if something inexpressible lay just below the surface of his
thoughts, Sir Frank went over to the bed and rested his hands on the boy's
shoulders. He seemed to stand on the brink of a precipice.
"Frank,"
he whispered—for the sleeping child had been given his own name—"Frank,
why don't you wake up?"
In
answer to the words, the youth's eyes opened. The usual wash of dizziness came
and went like a flash; Sir Frank found himself looking up into his own eyes.
He found more than that
He
found he was a youth of nineteen whose soul had been submerged until now. He
found he could sit up, stretch, run a hand marveling through his hair and
exclaim, "By our Lady!" He found he could get up, look long at the
green world beyond his window and finally turn back to stare at himself.
And
all the while "himself" had watched the performance with his own
eyes. Shaking, father and son sat down together on the bed.
"What sorcery is
this?" Sir Frank muttered.
But
it was no sorcery, or not in the sense Sir Frank meant. He had merely acquired
an additional body for his ego. It was not that he could be in either as he
pleased; he was in both at the same time. When the son came finally to
consciousness, it was to his father's consciousness.
Warily, experimenting that day and the next
few days— when the whole household rejoiced at this awakening of the
first-born—Sir Frank found that his new body could do all he could do: could
ride, could fence, could make love to a kitchen wench: could indeed do these
things better than the old body, which was beginning, just a little, to become
less pliant under approaching middle age. His experience, his knowledge, all
were resources equally at the command of either body. He was, in fact, two
people.
A
later generation could have explained the miracle to Sir Frank—though
explaining in terms he would not have understood. Though he knew well enough
the theory of family traits and likenesses, it would have been impossible then
to make him comprehend the intricacy of a chromosome which carries inside
it—not merely the stereotypes of parental hair or temperament—but the secret
knowledge of how to breathe, how to work the muscles to move the bones, how to
grow, how to remember, how to commence the processes of thought ... all the infinite number of secret
"how to's" that have to be passed on for life to stay above jelly
level.
A
freak chromosome in Sir Frank ensured he passed on, together with these usual
secrets, the secret of his individual consciousness.
It
was extraordinary to be in two places at once, doing two different
things—extraordinary, but not confusing. He merely had two bodies which were as
integrated as his two hands had been.
Frank II had a wonderful
time; youth and experience, foresight and a fresh complexion, were united as
never before. The combination was irresistible. The Virgin Queen, then in her
late twenties, summoned him before her and sighed deeply. Then, catching
Essex's eye, she put him out of reach of temptation by sending him off to serve
the ambassador at the court of her brother-in-law, Philip.
Frank II liked Spain. Philip's capital was
gayer, warmer and more sanitary than London. It was intoxicating to enjoy the
best of both courts. It proved also extremely remunerative: the shared
consciousness of Frank I and II was by far the quickest communicational link
between the two rival countries, and as such was worth money. Not that Frank
revealed his secret to a soul, but he let it be known he had a fleet of capable
spies who moved without risk of detection between England and Spain. Burly Lord
Burleigh beamed upon him. So did the Duke of Medina Sidonia.
So
fascinating was it being two people at once, that Frank I was slow to take any
systematic survey of other lurking advantages. An unfortunate tumble from a
horse, however, gave him leisure for meditation. Even then, he might have
missed the vital point, were it not for something that happened in Madrid.
Frank III was born.
Frank
II had passed on the renegade chromosome via a little Spanish courtesan. The
child was called Sancha. There was no coma about him! As if to defy the extreme
secrecy under which the birth took place, he wailed lustily from the start. And
he had the shared consciousness of his father and grandfather.
It
was an odd feeling indeed, opening this new annex to life and experiencing the
world through all the child's weakness and helplessness. There were many
frustrations for Frank I, but compensations too—not the least being closeted
so intimately with the babe's delightful mother.
This
birth made Frank realize one striking, blinding fact: as long as the chromosome
reproduced itself in sufficient dominance, he was immortal! To him, in an
unscientific age, the problem did not present itself quite like that; but he realized
that here was a trait to be kept in the family.
It
happened that Frank had married one of his daughters off to an architect called
Tanyk. This union produced a baby daughter some two weeks after the secret
birth of Frank HI (they hardly thought of him as Sancha). Frank I and II
arranged that III should come to England and marry Miss Tanyk just as soon as
both were old enough; the vital chromosome ought to be latent in her and appear
in her children.
Relations between England
and Spain deteriorating, Frank II came home shortly with the boy Frank III
acting as his page. The fruits of several other liaisons had to be left behind
with their mothers; they had no shared consciousness, only ordinary good red
English blood.
Frank II had been back in the aptly named
Mother Country for only a few months when a lady of his acquaintance presented
him with Frank IV. Frank IV was a girl, christened Berenice. The state of coma
which had ensnared Frank II for so long did not afflict Berenice, or any other
of his descendants.
Another tremendous
adjustment in the shared consciousness had to be made. That also had its
compensations; Frank was the first man ever really to appreciate the woman's
point of view.
So the eventful years
rolled on. Sir Frank's wife died; the Abbey of St. Duckwirt flourished; Frank
II sailed over to Hispaniola; the Armada sailed against England and was
repulsed. And in the next year, Frank III (Sancha), with his Spanish looks and
English money, won the hand of Rosalynd Tanyk, as prearranged. When his father
returned from the New World (with his English looks and Spanish money), it was
in time to see in person his daughter, Berenice, alias Frank IV, also taken in
wedlock.
By this year, Frank I was old and gray and
retired in the country. While he was experiencing old age in that body, he was
experiencing active middle age in his son's and the delights of matrimony in
his grandson's and granddaughter's.
He awaited anxiously the issue of Frank III
(Sancha)'s marriage to his cousin Rosalynd. There was offspring enough. One in
1590. Twins in 1591. Three lovely children —but, alas, ordinary mortals,
without shared consciousness. Then, while watching an indifferent and bloody
play called "Titus Andronicus," two years later, Rosalynd came into
labor, and was delivered—at a tavern in Cheapside— of Frank V.
In the succeeding years, she delivered Franks
VI and VIII. Frank VII sprang from Berenice (Frank IV)'s union. So did Frank
IX. The freak chromosome was getting into its stride.
Full of years, Sir Frank's
body died. The diphtheria which carried him off caused him as much suffering as
it would have done an ordinary man; dying was not eased by his unique gift. He
slid out into the long darkness—but his consciousness continued unabated in
eight other bodies.
It would be pleasant to follow the history of
these Franks (who, of course, really bore different surnames and Christian
names): but space forbids. Suffice it to say that there were vicissitudes—the
old queen shut Frank II in the Tower, Frank VI had a dose of the clap, Frank IX
ruined himself trying to grow asparagus, then newly discovered from Asia.
Despite this, the shared consciousness spread; the five who shared it in this
third generation prospered and produced children with the same ability.
The numbers grew. Twelve in the fourth
generation, twenty-two in the fifth, fifty in the sixth, and in the seventh, by
the time William and Mary came to the throne, one hundred and twenty-four.
These
people, scattered all over the country, a few of them on the continent, were
much like normal people. To outsiders, their relationship was not apparent;
they certainly never revealed it; they never met. They became traders, captains
of ships that traded with the Indies, soldiers, parliamentarians,
agriculturalists; some plunged into, some avoided, the constitutional struggles
that dogged most of the seventeenth century. But they were all—male or female—Franks.
They had the inexpressible benefit of their progenitor's one hundred and
seventy-odd years' experience, and not only of his, but of all the other
Franks. It was small wonder that, with few exceptions, whatever they did they
prospered.
By
the time George III came to the throne and rebellion broke out in the British
colonies in America the tenth generation of Franks numbered 2,160.
The
ambition of the original Frank had not died; it had grown subtler. It had
become a wish to sample everything. The more bodily habitations there were with
which to sample, the more tantalizing the idea seemed: for many experiences,
belonging only to one brief era, are never repeated, and may be gone before
they are perceived and tasted.
Such
an era was the Edwardian decade from 1901 to 1911. It suited Frank's
Elizabethan spirit, with its bounce and vulgarity and the London streets packed
tight with horse vehicles. His manifestations prospered; by the outbreak of
World War I they numbered over three and a half million.
The,
war, whose effect on the outlook and technology of the whole world was to be
incalculable, had a terrific influence on the wide-spread shared consciousness
of Frank.
Many Franks of the sixteenth generation were
killed in the muck of the trenches, he died not once but many times, developing
an obsessive dread of war which never left him.
By
the time the Americans entered the war, he was turning his many thoughts to
politics.
It
was not an easy job. Until now, he had concentrated on diversity in
occupations, savoring them all. He rode the fiery horses of the Camargue; he played in the orchestras of La Scala, Milan; he farmed daffodils in
the Scilly Isles; he built dikes along the Zuyder Zee; filmed with René Clair; preached in Vienna cathedral; operated in Bart's; fished in the
bilious Bay of Biscay; argued with the founder of the Bauhaus. Now he turned
the members of his consciousness among the rising generation into official
posts, compensating for the sameness and grayness of their jobs with the
thought that the change was temporary.
His
plans had not gone far enough before the Second World War broke out. His
consciousness, spread over eleven million people, suffered from Plymouth and
Guernsey to Siam and Hong Kong. It was too much. By the time the war ended,
world domination had become his aim.
Frank's chromosome was now
breeding as true as ever. Blood group, creed, color of skin—nothing was proof
against it. The numbers with shared consciousness, procreating for all they
were worth, trebled every generation.
Seventeenth generation: eleven millions in 1940.
Eighteenth generation: tMrty-three millions in 1965.
Nineteenth generation: a hundred million in 1990.
Twentieth generation: three hundred million in 2015.
Frank was well placed to stand as Member of
Parliament, for all his alter egos could vote for him. He stood as several
members, one of whom eventually became Prime Minister; but the intricacies of
office proved a dismal job. There was, after all, a simpler and far more
thorough way of ruling the country: by simple multiplication.
At this task, all the Franks set to with a will.
By the beginning of the twenty-first century,
Great Britain consisted only of Franks. Like a great multiplicity of mirrors,
they faced each other across counter and club; young or old, fat or thin, rich
or poor, all shared one massive consciousness.
Many modifications in private and public life
took place. Privacy ceasing to exist, all new houses were glass-built, curtains
abolished, walls pulled down. Police went, the entire legal structure vanished
overnight—a man does not litigate against himself. A parody of Parliament
remained, to deal with foreign affairs, but party politics, elections, leaders
in newspapers (even newspapers themselves) were scrapped.
Most
of the arts went. One manifestation of Frank did not care to see another
manifestation of Frank performing. TV, publishing, Tin Pan Alley, film studios
. . . out like lights.
The
surplus Franks, freed from all these dead enterprises and many more, went
abroad to beget more Franks.
All
these radical changes in the habits of the proverbially conservative British
were noticed elsewhere, particularly by the Americans and Canadians. They sent
observers over to report on the scene.
Before
long, the same radical changes were sweeping Europe. Frank's chromosome
conquered everywhere. Peace was guaranteed. . By the end of another century's
ruthless intermarriage, Russia and Asia were engulfed as thoroughly as Europe,
and by the same loving methods. Billions of people: one consciousness.
And then came Frank's first set-back in all
the centuries of his polydextrous existence. He turned his reproductive powers
toward the Americas. He was repulsed.
From
Argentine to Alaska, and all ports in between, the conqueror chromosome failed
to conquer.
The
massive, massed intellect set itself to work on the problem, soon arriving at
the answer. Another chromosome had got there first. Evidence of the truth of
this came when the drastic modifications in domestic and public life which had
swept the rest of the world swept the linked continents of North and South
America. There was a second shared consciousness.
By
various deductions, Frank concluded that the long-dead Frank U's visit to
Hispaniola had scattered some of the vital chromosome there. Not properly
stable at that time, it had developed its own separate shared consciousness,
which had spread through the Americas much as the Frank chromosome had spread
round the rest of the world.
It
was a difficult situation. The Franks and the Hispani-olas shared the globe
without speaking to each other. After a decade of debate, the Franks took an
obvious way out of the impasse: they built themselves a fleet of space ships
and headed into the solar system.
That,
ladies, gentleman and neuters, is a brief account of the extraordinary race
which recently landed on our planet, Venus, as they call it. I think we may
congratulate ourselves that our method of perpetuating our species is so
vastly different from theirs; nothing else could have saved us from that
insidious form of conquest
THE WONDER
HORSE
George Byram
George Byram explains his single excursion
inlo science fantasy as a sort of daydream-on-paper. Born in Mississippi in
1920, Byram grew up in Florida, and, after a desultory two years of college,
wandered west and "fell in love with the vast, mean, windy, cold,
murderous, wonderful country of north-central Wyoming," where (except for
two years in the Army Signal Corps in WW II) he stayed until 1950; then
"caught the universal postwar disease of securityitis," and left the
range to go to work (eventually) as a television announcer.
In
1950, he also sold his first story to Colliers; the next, in 1954, was to the Saturday Evening Post; then a broad assortment including True West, Atlantic and Sports Afield. Meanwhile,
he started a horse-breeding program in Colorado, "paying for what I lose
on the ranch out of what I earn in television and writing." He has
published two novels. The Piper's Tune and
Tomorrow's Hidden
Season.
"The
Wonder Horse" first appeared in Atlantic (August,
1957), and was reprinted in the 3rd Annual.
Webster says a mutation is a sudden variation, the offspring
differing from the parents in some well-marked character or characters—and
that certainly fits Red Eagle. He was foaled of registered parents, both his
sire and dam descending from two of the best bloodlines in the breed. But the
only thing normal about this colt was his color, a beautiful chestnut.
I
attended Red Eagle's arrival into the world. He was kicking at the sac that
enclosed him as I freed his nostrils from the membrane. He was on his feet in
one minute. He was straight and steady on his pasterns by the time his dam had
him licked dry. He had his first feeding before he was five minutes old, and he
was beginning to buck and rear
and prance by the time I got my wits about me
and called Ben.
Ben
came in the other end of the ramshackle barn from the feed lot. He was small as
men go, but big for a jockey. Not really old at forty-two, his hair was gray
and he was old in experience of horses.
Ben
came into the box stall and as he saw the colt he stopped and whistled. He
pushed back his hat and studied the red colt for a full five minutes. Even only
minutes old a horseman could see he was markedly different. The bones from
stifle to hock and elbow to knee were abnormally long. There was unusual length
and slope of shoulder. He stood high in the croup and looked like he was
running downhill. He had a very long underline and short back. All this spelled
uniquely efficient bone levers, and these levers were connected and powered by
the deepest hard-twisted muscles a colt ever brought into this world. Unbelievable
depth at the girth and immense spring to the ribs meant an engine of heart and
lungs capable of driving those muscled levers to their maximum. Red Eagle's nostrils
were a third larger than any we had ever seen- and he had a large, loose
windpipe between his broad jaws. He would be able to fuel the engine with all
the oxygen it could use. Most important of all, the clean, sharp modeling of his
head and the bigness and luster of his eyes indicated courage, will to win. But
because of his strange proportions he looked weird.
"Holy Mary," said
Ben softly, and I nodded agreement.
Ben
and I had followed horses all our lives. I as a veterinarian and trainer for
big breeders, Ben as a jockey. Each of us had outserved his usefulness. Ben had
got too heavy to ride; I had got too cantankerous for the owners to put up
with. I had studied bloodlines and knew the breeders were no longer improving
the breed, but I could never make anyone believe in my theories. One owner
after another had decided he could do without my services. Ben and I had pooled
our savings and bought a small ranch in Colorado. We had taken the mare that
had just foaled in lieu of salary from our last employer. Barton Croupwell had
laughed when we had asked for the mare rather than our money.
"Costello," he said to me,
"you and Ben have twenty-five hundred coming. That mare is nineteen years
old. She could drop dead tomorrow."
"She could have one more foal too,"
I said.
"She could, but it's five to two she
won't."
"That's good enough
odds for the kind of blood she's carrying."
Croupwell was a gambler who raised horses for
only one reason: to make money. He shook his head. "I've seen old codgers
set in their thinking, but you're the worst. I suppose you've got a stallion
picked out—in case this mare'll breed."
"He doesn't belong to you," I said.
That needled him. "I've got stallions
that bring five thousand for a stud fee. Don't tell me they aren't good
enough."
"Their bloodlines are wrong," I
answered. "Mr. Carvel-liers has a stallion called Wing Away."
"Carvelliers' stallions cost money. Are
you and Ben that flush?" He already knew what I had in mind.
"You and Carvelliers trade services,"
I said. "It wouldn't cost you anything to have the mare bred."
•He
threw back his head and laughed. He was a tall, thin man, always beautifully
tailored, with black hair and a line of mustache. "I'm not a
philanthropist," he said. "Do you really want this mare?"
"I said I did."
"You really think she'll get with
foal?" "I'll turn your odds around. I say it's five to two she
will."
"I'll gamble with you," he said.
"I'll send the mare over to Carvelliers'. If she settles I'll take care of
the stud fee. If she doesn't, I keep the mare."
"And my and Ben's twenty-five
hundred?"
"Of course."
"You're no gambler," I said,
looking him in the eye, "but I'll take the bet."
Now, Ben and I were looking at a running
machine that was something new on the face of the earth.
Our ranch was perfect for training the colt.
It was out of the way and we took particular care that no one ever saw Red
Eagle. By the time he was a yearling, our wildest estimate of what he would be
had fallen short. Ben began to ride him when he was a coming two-year-old. By that time he had reached seventeen hands, weighed twelve hundred
pounds, and could carry Ben's hundred and twenty-six as if Ben were nothing. Every
time Ben stepped off him he was gibbering like an idiot. I was little better.
This horse didn't run; he flowed. Morning after morning as Ben began to open
him up I would watch him coming down the track we had dozed out of the prairie
and he looked like a great wheel with flashing spokes rolling irresistibly
forward. Carrying as much weight as mature horses are asked to carry, our stop
watch told us Red Eagle had broken every world record for all distances and
this on an imperfect track. Ben and I were scared.
One
night when the racing season was close upon us, Ben said nervously, "I've
made a few calls to some jockeys I know.
CroupwelTs and Carvelliers' and some others. The best two-year-olds they got
are just normal, good colts. Red Eagle will beat them twenty lengths."
"You've
got to keep him under restraint, Ben. You can't let anybody know what he can
do."
"I
can do anything with him out here by himself. But who knows what he'll do with
other horses?"
"You've got to hold
him."
"Listen,
Cos, I've ridden some of the best and some of the toughest. I know what I can hold and what I can't. If Eagle ever takes it in his head to run,
there'll not he a hell of a lot I can
do about it."
"We've trained him
careful."
"Yes,
but if I've got him figured, he'll go crazy if a horse starts to crowd him.
Another thing, any horseman will see at a glance what we've got. They'll know
we're not letting him extend himself."
We
were standing out by the pine pole paddock and I turned and looked at Red
Eagle. Have you ever seen a cheetah? It's a cat. It runs faster than any other
living creature. It's long-legged and long-bodied and it moves soft and
graceful until it starts to run; then it becomes a streak with a blur of legs
beneath. Red Eagle looked more like a twelve-hundred-pound cheetah than a horse
and he ran the same way.
"Well,
he's a race horse," I said.
"If we don't race him, what'll we do with him?"
"We'll race him," said Ben,
"but things ain't ever goin' to be the same again."
That turned out to be pure
prophecy.
We
decided to start him on a western track. We had to mortgage the ranch to get
the money for his entry fee, but we had him entered in plenty of time. Two days
before the race we hauled him, blanketed, in a closed trailer and put him into
his stall without anyone getting a good look at him. We worked him out at dawn
each morning before any other riders were exercising their horses.
This
track was one where a lot of breeders tried their two-year-olds. The day of the
race the first person I saw was Croupwell. His mild interest told me he already
knew we had an entry. He looked at my worn Levis and string-bean frame.
"What's happened these three years, Costello? You don't appear to have
eaten regular."
"After today it'll be
different," I told him.
"That
colt you have entered, eh? He's not the bet you won from me, is he?"
"The same."
"I
see by the papers Ben's riding. Ben must have lost weight too."
"Not so's you'd
notice."
"You're
not asking a two-year-old to carry a hundred and twenty-eight pounds on its
first start!"
"He's used to Ben," I said
casually.
"Costello,
I happen to know you mortgaged your place to get the entry fee." He was
looking at me speculatively. His gambler's instinct told him something was
amiss. "Let's have a look at the colt."
"You'll
see him when we bring him out to be saddled," I said and walked away.
You
can't lead a horse like that among a group of horsemen without things
happening. Men who spend their lives with horses know what gives a horse reach
and speed and staying power. It didn't take an expert to see what Red Eagle
had. When we took the blanket off him in the saddle paddock every jockey and
owner began to move close. In no time there was a milling group of horsemen in
front of where Ben and I were saddling Eagle.
Carvelliers, a handsome, white-haired
Southern gentleman,
called me to him. "Costello, is that Wing Away's colt?"
"Your signature's on his papers," I
said. "I'll give you fifty thousand dollars for his dam." "She's
dead," I said. "She died two weeks after we'd weaned this colt."
"Put a price on the colt," he said
without hesitation. "He's not for sale," I answered.
"We'll
talk later," he said and turned and headed for the betting windows. Every
man in the crowd followed him. I saw several stable hands pleading with
acquaintances to borrow money to bet on Eagle despite the extra weight he would
be spotting the other horses. By the time the pari-mutuel windows closed, our
horse was the odds-on favorite and nobody had yet seen him run.
"I'm
glad we didn't have any money to bet," said Ben, as I legged him up.
"A dollar'll only make you a dime after what they've done to the
odds."
The
falling odds on Red Eagle had alerted the crowd to watch for him. As the horses
paraded before the stands there was a rippling murmur of applause. He looked entirely
unlike the other eight horses on the track. He padded along, his head bobbing
easily, his long hind legs making him look like he was going downhill. He took
one step to the other mincing throughbreds' three.
I
had gone down to the rail and as Ben brought him by, heading for the
backstretch where the six-furlong race would start, I could see the Eagle
watching the other horses, his ears flicking curiously. I looked at Ben. He was
pale. "How is he?" I called.
Ben
glanced at me out of the corners of his eyes. "He's different."
"Different!" I called back edgily.
"How?" "Your guess is good as mine," Ben called over his
shoulder.
Eagle
went into the gate at his assigned place on the outside as docilely as we'd
trained him to. But when the gate flew open, the rush of horses startled him.
Breaking on top, he opened up five lengths on the field in the first sixteenth
of a mile. The crowd went whoosh with a concerted sigh of amazement.
"Father in heaven, hold him," I heard myself saying.
Through my binoculars, I could see the riders
on the other horses studying the red horse ahead of them. Many two-year-olds
break wild, but no horse opens five lengths in less than two hundred yards. I
saw Ben steadying him gently, and as they went around the first turn, Ben had
slowed him until the pack moved up to within a length.
That
was as close as any horse ever got. Around the turn a couple of riders went
after Eagle and the pack spread briefly into groups of three and two and two
singles. I could see the two horses behind Eagle make their move. Eagle opened
another three lengths before they hit the turn into the stretch and I could see
Ben fighting him. The two that had tried to take the lead were used up and the
pack came by them as all the riders turned their horses on for the stretch
drive. Eagle seemed to sense the concerted effort behind him and his rate of
flow changed. It was as if a racing car had its accelerator floorboarded. He
came into the stretch gaining a half length every time his feet hit the turf.
When
he hit the wire he was a hundred yards ahead of the nearest horse and still
going away. Ben had to take him completely around the track before Eagle
realized there were no horses behind him. By the time Ben walked him into the
winner's circle, Eagle's sides were rising and falling evenly. He was only
damp, not having got himself hot enough to sweat.
The
first thing I remember seeing was Ben's guilty expression. "I tried to
hold him," he said. "When he realized something was trying to outrun
him he got so damn mad he didn't even know I was there."
The
loudspeaker had gone into a stuttering frenzy. Yes, the world's record for six
furlongs had been broken. Not only broken, ladies and gentlemen; five seconds
had been cut from it. No, the win was not official. Track veterinarians had to
examine the horse. Please keep your seats, ladies and gentlemen.
Keep
their seats, hell I Every man, woman, and child was going to see
at close range the horse that could run like that There had been tears in my
eyes as Eagle rolled down the stretch. You couldn't stay calm when you saw what
these people had seen.
The rest of that day sorts itself into
blurred episodes.
First,
the vets checked Eagle's teeth, his registration papers, his date of foaling,
and finally rechecked the number tattooed in his lip to make sure he was a
two-year-old. Then they found that he had not been stimulated. They also found
measurements so unbelievable they seriously questioned whether this animal was
a horse. They went into a huddle with the track officials.
There was loose talk of trying to rule the
Eagle off the tracks. Carvelliers pointed out that Eagle's papers were in
perfect order, his own stallion had sired him, he was a thoroughbred of
accepted bloodlines, and there was no way he could legally be ruled ineligible.
"If that horse is
allowed to run," said one track official, "who will race against
him?"
Croupwell was seated at the conference table,
as were most of the other owners. "Gentlemen," he said suavely,
"aren't you forgetting the handicapper?"
The job of a handicapper is to figure how
much weight each horse is to carry. It is a known fact that a good handicapper
can make any field of horses come in almost nose and nose by imposing greater
weights on the faster horses. But Croupwell was forgetting something. Usually,
only older horses run in handicaps.
I jumped to my feet. "You know
two-year-olds are not generally handicapped," I said. "They race
under allowance conditions."
"True," said Croupwell.
"Two-year-olds usually do run under arbitrary weights. But it is a
flexible rule, devised to fit the existing situation. Now that the situation
has changed, arbitrarily the weights must be changed."
Carvelliers frowned
angrily. "Red Eagle was carrying a hundred and twenty-eight against a
hundred and four for the other colts. You would have to impose such weights to
bring him down to an ordinary horse that you'd break him down."
Croupwell shrugged.
"If that should be true, it is unfortunate. But we have to think of the
good of racing. You know that its lifeblood is betting. There will be no
betting against this horse in any race it's entered."
Carvelliers rose. "Gentlemen," and
the way he said it was an insult, "I have been breeding and racing horses
all my life. It has always been my belief that racing was to improve the breed,
not kill the best horses." He turned to Ben and me. "At your
convenience I would like to speak with you."
Ben and I paid off the loan we'd used for the
entry fee, bought ourselves some presentable clothes, and went up to
Carvelliers' hotel.
"Hello,
Ben; good to see you," he said. "Costello, I owe you an apology. I've
disagreed with you on bloodlines for years. You've proven me wrong."
"You've
been wrong," I agreed, "but Red Eagle is not the proof. He would have
been a good colt if he was normal—maybe the best, but what he actually is has
nothing to do with bloodlines."
"Do you think he's a
mutation—something new?"
"Completely."
"How
much weight do you think he can carry and still win?"
I
turned to Ben and Ben said, "He'll win carrying any weight. He'll kill
himself to win."
"It's
too bad you couldn't have held him," said Carvelliers. "My God, five
seconds cut from the record. Don't fool yourself, they'll weight him until even
tendons and joints such as his can't stand it. Will you run him regardless?"
"What else will there
be to do?"
"Hmmmm. Yes. Well, maybe you're right.
But if they break him down, I have a proposition to make you." We thanked
him and left.
Ben
and I planned our campaign carefully. "We've got to train him with other
horses," Ben told me. "If I can get him used to letting a horse stay
a few lengths behind, I can hold him down."
We
bought two fairly good platers with the rest of our first winnings and hired
neighboring ranch kids to ride them. We began to see men with binoculars on the
hills around our track. We let the Eagle loaf and the boys with the binoculars never
saw any great times.
The
racing world had gone crazy over what Red Eagle had done to the records. But as
time passed and the binocular boys reported he wasn't burning up his home
track, the writers began to hint that it had been a freak performance—certainly
remarkable, but could he do it again? This was the attitude we wanted. Then we
put Red Eagle in his second race, this one a mile and a sixteenth.
It
was a big stakes race for two-year-olds. We didn't enter him until the last
minute. Even so, the news got around and the track had never had such a large
attendance and such little betting. The people didn't dare bet against the
Eagle, but he had only run at six furlongs and they weren't ready to believe in
him and bet on him to run a distance. Because of the low pari-mutuel take, we
were very unpopular with the officials of that track.
"If
there's any way you can do it," I told Ben, "hold him at the
gate."
'Til hold him if I
can."
By
this time Red Eagle had become used to other horses and would come out of the
gate running easily. When they sprung the gate on those crack two-year-olds
that day, Ben had a tight rein and the pack opened a length on the Eagle before
he understood he'd been double-crossed. When he saw horses ahead of him he went crazy.
He
swung far outside and caught the pack before they were in front of the stands.
He'd opened five lengths at the first turn. He continued to accelerate in the
back stretch, and the crowd had gone crazy too. When he turned into the stretch
the nearest thing to him was the starting gate the attendants hadn't quite had
time to pull out of the way. Eagle swerved wide to miss the gate and then, as
if the gate had made him madder, really turned it on. When he crossed the
finish line the first horse behind him hadn't entered the stretch. I sat down
weakly and cried. He had cut ten seconds
off the world's record for a mile and a sixteenth.
The
pandemonium did not subside when the race was over. Front-page headlines all
over the world said, "New Wonder Horse Turns Racing World
Topsy-turvy." That was an understatement
"The
next time we run him," I told Ben, "they'll put two sacks of feed and
a bale of hay on him."
Ben
was gazing off into the distance. "You can't imagine what it's like to sit
on all that power and watch a field of horses go by you backward, blip, like
that. You know something, Cos? He still wasn't flat out."
"Fine," I said sarcastically.
"We'll run him against Mercedes and Jaguars."
Well, they weighted him. The handicapper
called for one hundred thirty-seven pounds. It was an unheard-of weight for a
two-year-old to carry, but it wasn't as bad as I had expected.
At home we put the one thirty-seven on him
and eased him along for a few weeks. He didn't seem to notice the weight. The
first time Ben let him out he broke his own record. I kept tabs on his legs and
he never heated in the joints or swelled.
We entered him in the next race to come up.
It rained for two days before the race and the track was a sea of mud. Some
thought the "flying machine," as Red Eagle was beginning to be
called, could not set his blazing pace in mud.
"What do you think?" I asked Ben. "He's never run in
mud."
"Hell, Cos, that horse don't notice what
he's running on. He just feels the pressure of something behind him trying to
outrun him and it pushes him like a jet."
Ben was right. When the pack came out of the
gate that day, Red Eagle squirted ahead like a watermelon seed squeezed from
between your fingers. He sprayed the pack briefly with mud, then blithely left
them, and when he came down the stretch he was completely alone.
During the next several races, three things became apparent. First, the
handicapper had no measuring stick to figure what weight Eagle should carry.
They called for one hundred forty, forty-two, then forty-five, and Eagle came
down the stretch alone. The second thing became apparent after Eagle had won
carrying one forty-five. His next race he started alone. No one would enter
against him. Third, Eagle was drawing the greatest crowds in the history of
racing.
There were two big races left that season.
They were one day and a thousand miles apart. The officials at both tracks were
in a dilemma. Whichever race Eagle entered would have a huge crowd, but it
would be a walkaway and that crowd would bet its last dollar on Eagle, because
the track was required by law to pay ten cents on the dollar. The officials
resolved their dilemma by using the old adage:
You
can stop a freight train if you put enough weight on it. Red Eagle was required to carry the
unheard-of weight of one hundred and seventy pounds. Thus they hoped to encourage
other owners to race against us and at the same time they'd have Eagle's
drawing power.
Ben
grew obstinate. "I don't want to hurt him and that weight'll break him
down."
"Great,"
I replied. "Two worn-out old duffers with the world's greatest horse end
up with two platers, a sandhills ranch, and the winnings from a few
races."
"I
know how you feel," said Ben. "The only thing you could have got out
of this was money, but I get to ride him."
"Well," I said, trying to be
philosophical about it, "I get to watch him and that's almost as good as
riding him." I stopped and grabbed Ben's arm. "What did I say?"
Ben jerked his arm away.
"You gone nuts?"
"Get
to watch him! Ben, what's happened every time the Eagle's run?"
"He's broke a
record," said Ben matter-of-factly.
"He's
sent several thousand people into hysterics," I amended.
Ben
looked at me. "Are you thinking people would pay to see just one horse
run?"
"Has
there ever been more than one when the Eagle's run? Come on. We're going to
enter him."
We entered Eagle in the next to the last race
of the season. What I'd expected happened. All the other owners pulled out.
They weren't having any of the Eagle even carrying a hundred and seventy
pounds. They all entered in the last race. No horse, not even the Eagle—they
thought—had the kind of stamina to make two efforts on successive days with a
plane trip sandwiched between, so they felt safe.
The officials at the second track were
jubilant. They had the largest field they had ever run. The officials at the
first track had apoplexy. They wanted to talk to us. They offered plane fare
and I flew down.
"Would
you consider an arrangement," they asked, "whereby you would withdraw
your horse?"
"I would not," I
replied.
"The public won't attend a
walkaway," they groaned, "even with the drawing power of your
horse." What they were thinking of was that ten cents on the dollar.
"That's
where you're wrong," I told them. "Advertise that the wonder horse is
running unweighted against his own record and you'll have a sellout."
Legally,
they could not call off the race, so they had to agree.
On
the way home I stopped off at Carvelliers'. We had a long talk and drew up an
agreement. "It'll work," I said. "I know it will."
"Yes,"
agreed Carvelliers, "it will work, but you must persuade Ben to run him
just once carrying the hundred and seventy. We've got to scare the whole racing
world to death."
"I'll persuade
him," I promised.
When
I got home I took Ben aside. "Ben," I said, "every cow horse has
to carry more than a hundred and seventy pounds."
"Yeah,
but a cow horse don't run a mile in just over a minute."
"Nevertheless,"
I said, "he'll run as fast as he can carrying that weight and it doesn't
hurt him."
"But
a cow horse has pasterns and joints like a work horse. They just ain't built
like a thoroughbred."
"Neither is Red
Eagle," I answered.
"What's
this all about? You already arranged for him not to carry any weight."
"That's for the first
race."
"First
race! You ain't thinkin' of
runnin' in both of them?"
"Yes,
and that second one will be his last race. I'll never ask you to ride him
carrying that kind of weight again."
"You
ought to be ashamed to ask me to ride him carrying it at all." Then what
I had said sunk in. "Last
race! How do you know it'll
be his last race?"
"I forgot to tell you
I had a talk with Carvelliers."
"So you had a talk
with Carvelliers. So what?"
"Ben,"
I pleaded, "trust me. See what the Eagle can do with a hundred and
seventy."
"All
right," said Ben grudgingly, "but I ain't goin' to turn him on."
"Turn him on!" I snorted. "You
ain't ever been able to turn him off."
Ben
was surprised but I wasn't when Red Eagle galloped easily under the weight. Ben
rode him for a week before he got up the nerve to let him run. Eagle was still
way ahead of every record except his own. He stayed sound.
When
we entered him in the second race all but five owners withdrew their horses.
These five knew their animals were the best of that season, barring our colt.
And they believed that the Eagle after a plane ride, a run the day before, and
carrying a hundred and seventy pounds was fair competition.
At
the first track Eagle ran unweighted before a packed stand. The people jumped
and shouted with excitement as the red streak flowed around the track, racing
the second hand of the huge clock that had been erected in front of the odds
board. Ben was worried about the coming race and only let him cut a second off
his previous record. But that was enough. The crowd went mad. And I had the
last ammunition I needed.
The
next day dawned clear'and sunny. The track was fast. Every seat in the stand
was sold and the infield was packed. The press boxes overflowed with writers,
anxiously waiting to report to the world what the wonder horse would do. The
crowd that day didn't have to be told. They bet their last dollar on him to
win.
Well,
it's all history now. Red Eagle, carrying one hundred and seventy pounds, beat
the next fastest horse five lengths. All the fences in front of the stands were
torn down by the crowd trying to get a close look at the Eagle. The track lost
a fortune and three officials had heart attacks.
A meeting was called and they pleaded with us
to remove our horse from competition.
"Gentlemen,"
I said, "we'll make you a proposition. You noticed yesterday that the gate
for Eagle's exhibition was the largest that track ever had. Do you understand?
People will pay to watch Eagle run against time. If you'll guarantee us two
exhibitions a season at each major track and give us sixty per cent of the
gate, we'll agree never to run the Eagle in competition."
It was such a logical move that they wondered
they
hadn't
thought of it themselves. It worked out beautifully. Owners of ordinary horses
could run them with the conviction that they would at least be somewhere in
the stretch when the race finished. The officials were happy, because not only
was racing secure again, but they made money out of their forty per cent of the
gates of Eagle's exhibitions. And we were happy, because we made even more
money. Everything has been serene for three seasons. But I'm a little concerned
about next year.
I
forgot to tell you the arrangement Carvelliers and I had made. First, we had
discussed a little-known aspect of mutations: namely, that they pass on to
their offspring their new characteristics. Carvelliers has fifty brood mares on
his breeding farm, and Red Eagle proved so sure at stud that next season fifty
carbon copies of him will be hitting the tracks. You'd never believe it, but
they run just like their sire, and Ben and I own fifty per cent of each of
them. Ben feels somewhat badly about it, but, as I pointed out, we only
promised not to run the Eagle.
NOBODY BOTHERS
GUS
Aigis
Budrys
Algis Budrys is in a sense the prototype writer for this
anthology: first published in 1952, he had an immediate success, wrote
prolifically through the fifties, and tapered off, after 1957, to a full stop
in the early sixties. Typically, too, his work was primarily sociological and
psychological in orientation.
In no
other way is Budrys typical of anything. The son of a Free Lithuanian diplomat,
he came to the U.S. at the age of five in 1936; wrote his first story (science
fiction) six years later, and sold his first (science fiction) ten years after
that. He had half a dozen books in print, and was widely published in
magazines, in and out of s-f, when he moved to Chicago in 1961 to become editor
of Regency Books, and then editorial director of Playboy's book-publishing division.
Except
for a few articles tEsquire,
Saturday Evening Post), he
virtually stopped writing until 1966, when his first suspense story, "The
Master of the Hounds", was nominated for an "Edgar" award, and
he began selling to the SF magazines again. A new science-fiction novel is now
completed, and a suspense novel is in work.
Budrys'
work has appeared in three Annuals: "Silent Brother" and "The
Edge of the Sea" were in the 2nd and 4th; "Nobody Bothers Gus"
was first published in Astounding
in November, 1955, under
the pseudonym, "Paul Janvier," and reprinted in the 1st Annual.
Two years
earlier,
Gus Kusevic had been driving slowly down the narrow back road into Boonesboro.
It
was good country for slow driving, particularly in the late spring. There was
nobody else on the road. The woods were just blooming into a deep, rich green
as yet unburned by summer, and the afternoons were still cool and fresh. And,
just before he reached the Boonesboro town line, he saw the locked and
weathered cottage standing for sale on its quarter-acre lot.
He had pulled his roadcar up to a gentle
stop, swung sideways in his seat, and looked at it.
It
needed paint; the siding had gone from white to gray, and the trim was faded.
There were shingles missing here and there from the roof, leaving squares of
darkness on the sun-bleached rows of cedar, and inevitably, some of the
windowpanes had cracked. But the frame hadn't slouched out of square, and the
roof hadn't sagged. The chimney stood up straight.
He
looked at the straggled clumps and windrowed hay that were all that remained of
the shrubbery and the lawn. His broad, homely face bunched itself into a quiet
smile along its well-worn seams. His hands itched for the feel of a spade.
He
got out of the roadcar, walked across the road and up to the cottage door, and
copied down the name of the real estate dealer listed on the card tacked to the
doorframe.
Now it was almost two years later, early in
April, and Gus was top-dressing his lawn.
Earlier
in the day he'd set up a screen beside the pile of topsoil behind his house,
shoveled the soil through the screen, mixed it with broken peat moss, and
carted it out to the lawn, where he left it in small piles. Now he was
carefully raking it out over the young grass in a thin layer that covered only
the roots, and let the blades peep through. He intended to be finished by the
time the second half of the Giants-Kodiaks doubleheader came on. He
particularly wanted to see it because Halsey was pitching for the Kodiaks, and
he had something of an avuncular interest in Halsey.
He worked without waste motion or excess
expenditure of energy. Once or twice he stopped and had a beer in the shade of
the rose arbor he'd put up around the front door. Nevertheless, the sun was hot;
by early afternoon, he had his shirt off.
Just
before he would have been finished, a battered flivver settled down in front
of the house. It parked with a flurry of its rotors, and a gangling man in a
worn serge suit, with thin hair plastered across his tight scalp, climbed out
and looked at Gus uncertainly.
Gus had glanced up briefly while the flivver
was on its silent way down. He'd made out the barely-legible "Falmouth
County Clerk's Office" lettered over the faded paint on its door,
shrugged, and gone on with what he was doing.
Gus
was a big man. His shoulders were heavy and broad; his chest was deep, grizzled
with thick, iron-gray hair. His stomach had gotten a little heavier with the
years, but the muscles were still there under the layer of flesh. His upper
arms were thicker than a good many thighs, and his forearms were enormous.
His
face was seamed by a network of folds and creases. His flat cheeks were marked
out by two deep furrows that ran from the sides of his bent nose, merged with
the creases bracketing his wide lips, and converged toward the blunt point of
his jaw. His pale blue eyes twinkled above high cheekbones which were covered
with wrinkles. His close-cropped hair was as white as cotton.
Only
repeated and annoying exposure would give his body a tan, but his face was
permanently browned. The pink of his body sunburn was broken in several places
by white scar tissue. The thin line of a knife cut emerged from the tops of his
pants and faded out across the right side of his stomach. The other significant
area of scarring lay across the uneven knuckles of his heavy-fingered hands.
The
clerk looked at the mailbox to make sure of the name, checking it against an
envelope he was holding in one hand. He stopped and looked at Gus again,
mysteriously nervous.
Gus
abruptly realized that he probably didn't present a reassuring appearance. With
all the screening and raking he'd been doing, there'd been a lot of dust in the
air. Mixed with perspiration, it was all over his face, chest, arms, and back.
Gus knew he didn't look very gentle even at his cleanest and best-dressed. At
the moment, he couldn't blame the clerk for being skittish.
He tried to smile
disarmingly.
The
clerk ran his tongue over his lips, cleared his throat with a slight cough, and
jerked his head toward the mailbox. "Is that right? You Mr.
Kusevic?"
Gus nodded. "That's
right. What can I do for you?"
The
clerk held up the envelope. "Got a notice here from the County
Council," he muttered, but he was obviously much more taken up by his effort to equate
Gus with the rose arbor, the neatly edged and carefully tended flower beds, the
hedges, the flagstoned walk, the small goldfish pond under the willow tree, the
white-painted cottage with its window boxes and bright shutters, and the
curtains showing inside the sparkling windows.
Gus waited until the man was through with his
obvious thoughts, but something deep inside him sighed quietly. He had gone
through this moment of bewilderment with so many other people that he was quite
accustomed to it, but that is not the same thing as being oblivious.
"Well,
come on inside," he said after a decent interval. "It's pretty hot
out here, and I've got some beer in the cooler."
The
clerk hesitated again. "Well, all I've got to do is deliver this
notice—" he said, still looking around. "Got the place fixed up real
nice, don't you?"
Gus
smiled. "It's my home. A man likes to live in a nice place. In a
hurry?"
The
clerk seemed to be troubled by something in what Gus had said. Then he looked
up suddenly, obviously just realizing he'd been asked a direct question.
"Huh?"
"You're
not in any hurry, are you? Come on in; have a beer. Nobody's expected to be a
ball of fire on a spring afternoon."
The
clerk grinned uneasily. "No...
nope, guess not." He brightened. "O.K.! Don't mind if I do."
Gus
ushered him into the house, grinning with pleasure. Nobody'd seen the inside of
the place since he'd fixed it up; the clerk was the first visitor he'd had
since moving in. There weren't even any delivery men; Boonesboro was so small
you had to drive in for your own shopping. There wasn't any mail carrier service,
of course—not that Gus ever received any mail.
He
showed the clerk into the living room. "Have a seat. I'll be right
back." He went quickly out to the kitchen, took some beer out of the
cooler, loaded a tray with glasses, a bowl of chips and pretzels, and the beer,
and carried it out.
The
clerk was up, looking around the library that covered two of the Jiving room
walls.
Looking at his expression, Gus realized with
genuine regret that the man wasn't the kind to doubt whether an obvious clod
like Kusevic had read any of this stuff. A man like that could still be talked
to, once the original misconceptions were knocked down. No, the clerk was too
plainly mystified that a grown man would fool with books. Particularly a man
like Gus; now, one of these kids that messed with college politics, that was
something else. But a grown man oughtn't to act like that.
Gus
saw it had been a mistake to expect anything of the clerk. He should have known
better, whether he was hungry for company or not. He'd always been hungry for company, and it was time he
realized, once and for all, that he just plain wasn't going to find any.
He
set the tray down on the table, uncapped a beer quickly, and handed it to the
man.
"Thanks,"
the clerk mumbled. He took a swallow, sighed loudly, and wiped his mouth with
the back of his hand. He looked around the room again. "Cost you a lot to
have all this put in?"
Gus
shrugged. "Did most of it myself. Built the shelves and furniture; stuff
like that. Some of the paintings I had to buy, and the books and records."
The
clerk grunted. He seemed to be considerably ill at ease, probably because of
the notice he'd brought, whatever it was. Gus found himself wondering what it
could possibly be, but, now that he'd made the mistake of giving the man a
beer, he had to wait politely until it was finished before he could ask.
He
went over to the TV set. "Baseball fan?" he asked the clerk.
"Sure!"
"Giants-Kodiaks ought to be on." He
switched the set on and pulled up a hassock, sitting on it so as not to get one
of the chairs dirty. The clerk wandered over and stood looking at the screen,
taking slow swallows of his beer.
The second
game had started, and Halsey's familiar figure appeared on the screen as the
set warmed up. The lithe young lefthander was throwing with his usual boneless
motion, apparently not working hard at all, but the ball was whipping past the
batters with a sizzle that the home plate microphone was picking up clearly.
Gus nodded toward Halsey. "He's quite a
pitcher, isn't he?"
The
clerk shrugged. "Guess so. Walker's their best man, though."
Gus
sighed as he realized he'd forgotten himself again. The clerk wouldn't pay much
attention to Halsey, naturally.
But
he was getting a little irritated at the man, with his typical preconceptions
of what was proper and what wasn't, of who had a right to grow roses and who
didn't.
"Offhand,"
Gus said to the clerk, "could you tell me what Halsey's record was, last
year?"
The
clerk shrugged. "Couldn't tell you. Wasn't bad— I remember that much. 13-7, something like that."
Gus nodded to himself.
"Uh-huh. How'd Walker do?"
"Walker!
Why, man, Walker just won something like twenty-five games, that's all. And
three no-hitters. How'd Walker do? Huh!"
Gus
shook his head. "Walker's a good pitcher, all right— but he didn't pitch
any no-hitters. And he only won eighteen games."
The
clerk wrinkled his forehead. He opened his mouth to argue and then stopped. He
looked like a sure-thing bettor who'd just realized that his memory had played
him a trick.
"Say—I
think you're right! Huh! Now what the Sam Hill made me think Walker was the guy?
And you know something—I've been talking about him all winter, and nobody once
called me wrong?" The clerk scratched his head. "Now, somebody pitched them games! Who the dickens was
it?" He scowled in concentration.
Gus
silently watched Halsey strike out his third batter in a row, and his face
wrinkled into a slow smile. Halsey was still young; just hitting his stride. He
threw himself into the game with all the energy and enjoyment a man felt when
he realized he was at his peak, and that, out there on the mound in the sun, he
was as good as any man who ever had gone before him in this profession.
Gus
wondered how soon Halsey would see the trap he'd set for himself.
Because
it wasn't a contest. Not for Halsey. For Christy Mathewson, it had been a
contest. For Lefty Grove and
Dizzy Dean, for Bob Feller and Slats Gould,
it had been a contest. But for Halsey it was just a complicated form of
solitaire that always came out right.
Pretty
soon, Halsey'd realize that you can't handicap yourself at solitaire. If you
knew where all the cards are; if you knew that unless you deliberately cheated
against yourself, you couldn't help but win—what good was it? One of these
days, Halsey'd realize there wasn't a game on Earth he couldn't beat; whether
it was.a physical contest, organized and formally recognized as a game, or
whether it was the billion-triggered pinball machine called Society.
What
then, Halsey? What then? And if you find out, please, in the name of whatever
kind of brotherhood we share, let me know.
The clerk grunted. "Well, it don't
matter, I guess. I can always look it up in the record book at home."
Yes,
you can, Gus commented silently. But you won't notice what it says, and, if you
do, you'll forget it and never realize you've forgotten.
The
clerk finished his beer, set it down on the tray, and was free to remember what
he'd come here for. He looked around the room again, as though the memory were
a cue of some kind.
"Lots
of books," he commented.
Gus nodded, watching Halsey walk out to the
pitcher's mound again.
"Uh
... you read 'em all?" Gus shook
his head.
"How
about that one by that Miller fellow? I hear that's a pretty good one."
So.
The clerk had a certain narrow interest in certain aspects of certain kinds of
literature.
"I
suppose it is," Gus answered truthfully. "I read the first three
pages, once." And, having done so, he'd known how the rest of it was going
to go, who would do what when, and he'd lost interest. The library had been a
mistake, just one of a dozen similar experiments. If he'd wanted an academic
familiarity with human literature, he could just as easily have picked it up by
browsing through bookstores, rather than buying the books and doing substantially
the same thing at home. He couldn't hope to extract any emotional empathies, no
matter what he did.
Face it, though; rows of even useless books
were better than bare wall. The trappings of culture were a bulwark of sorts,
even though it was a learned culture and not a felt one, and meant no more to him than the culture of the Incas. Try as he
might, he could never be an Inca. Nor even a Maya or an Aztec, or any kind of
kin, except by the most tenuous of extensions.
But
he had no culture of his own. There was the thing; the emptiness that
nevertheless ached; the rootlessness, the complete absence of a place to stand
and say: "This is my own."
Halsey
struck out the first batter in the inning with three pitches. Then he put a
slow floater precisely where the next man could get the best part of his bat on
it, and did not even look up as the ball screamed out of the park. He struck
out the next two men with a total of eight pitches.
Gus
shook his head slowly. That was the first symptom; when you didn't bother to be
subtle about your handicapping any more.
The
clerk held out the envelope. "Here," he said brusquely, having
finally shilly-shallied his resolution up to the point of doing it despite his
obvious nervousness at Gus' probable reaction.
Gus
opened the envelope and read the notice. Then, just as the clerk had been
doing, he looked around the room. A dark expression must have flickered over
his face, because the clerk became even more hesitant. "I... I want you to know I regret this. I
guess all of us do."
Gus
nodded hastily. "Sure, sure." He stood up and looked out the front
window. He smiled crookedly, looking at the top-dressing spread carefully over
the painstakingly rolled lawn, which was slowly taking form on the plot where
he had plowed last year and picked out pebbles, seeded and watered, shoveled
topsoil, laid out flower beds ... ah,
there was no use going into that now. The whole plot, cottage and all, was
condemned, and that was that.
"They're . . . they're turnin' the road
into a twelve-lane freight highway," the clerk explained. Gus nodded absently.
The
clerk moved closer and dropped his voice. "Look— I was told to tell you
this. Not in writin'." He sidled even closer, and actually looked around
before he spoke. He laid his hand confidentially on Gus' bare forearm.
"Any
price you ask for," he muttered, "is gonna be O.K., as long as you
don't get too greedy. The county isn't paying this bill. Not even the state,
if you get what I mean."
Gus
got what he meant. Twelve-lane highways aren't built by anything but national
governments.
He got more than that. National governments
don't work this way unless there's a good reason.
"Highway between Hollister and
Farnham?" he asked.
The clerk paled. "Don't know for
sure," he muttered.
Gus
smiled thinly. Let the clerk wonder how he'd guessed. It couldn't be much of a
secret, anyway—not after the grade was laid out and the purpose became
self-evident. Besides, the clerk wouldn't wonder very long.
A
streak of complete perversity shot through Gus. He recognized its source in his
anger at losing the cottage, but there was no reason why he shouldn't allow
himself to cut loose.
"What's your name?" he asked the
clerk abruptly. "Uh . .. Harry
Danvers." '
"Well,
Harry, suppose I told you I could stop that highway, if I wanted to? Suppose I
told you that no bulldozer could get near this place without breaking down,
that no shovel could dig this ground, that sticks of dynamite just plain
wouldn't explode if they tried to blast? Suppose I told you that if they did
put in the highway, it would turn soft as ice cream if I wanted it to, and run
away like a river?"
"Huh?"
"Hand me your pen."
Danvers reached out mechanically and handed
it to him. Gus put it between his palms and rolled it into a ball. He dropped
it and caught it as it bounced up sharply from the soft, thick rug. He pulled
it out between his fingers, and it returned to its cylindrical shape. He unscrewed
the cap, flattened it out into a sheet between two fingers, scribbled on it,
rolled it back into a cap, and, using his fingernail to draw out the ink which
was now part of it, permanently inscribed Danvers' name just below the surface
of the metal. Then he screwed the cap on again and handed the pen back to the
county clerk. "Souvenir," he said.
The clerk looked down at it.
"Well?"
Gus asked. "Aren't you curious about how I did it and what I am?"
The
clerk shook his head. "Good trick. I guess you magician fellows must
spend a lot of time practicing, huh? Can't say I could see myself spendin' that
much working time on a hobby."
Gus
nodded. "That's a good, sound, practical point of view," he said.
Particularly when all of us automatically put out a field that damps curiosity,
he thought. What point of view could you
have?
He
looked over the clerk's shoulder at the lawn, and one side of his mouth twisted
sadly.
Only
God can make a tree, he thought, looking at the shrubs and flower beds. Should
we all, then, look for our challenge in landscape gardening? Should we become
the gardeners of the rich humans in their expensive houses, driving up in our
old, rusty trucks, oiling our lawnmowers, kneeling on the humans' lawns with
our clipping shears, coming to the kitchen door to ask for a drink of water on
a hot summer day?
The
highway. Yes, he could stop the highway. Or make it go around him. There was no
way of stopping the curiosity damper, no more than there was a way of willing
his heart to stop, but it could be stepped up. He could force his mind to labor
near overload, and no one would ever even see the cottage, the lawn, the rose arbor, or the battered old man,
drinking his beer. Or rather, seeing them, would pay them absolutely no
attention.
But
the first time he went into town, or when he died, the field would be off, and
then what? Then curiosity, then investigation, then, perhaps a fragment of
theory here or there to be fitted to another somewhere else. And then what?
Pogrom?
He
shook his head. The humans couldn't win, and would lose monstrously. That was why he couldn't leave the humans a clue. He had no taste for
slaughtering sheep, and he doubted if his fellows did.
His
fellows. Gus stretched his mouth. The only one he could be sure of was Halsey.
There had to be others, but there was no way of finding them. They provoked no
reaction from the humans; they left no trail to follow. It was only if they
showed themselves, like Halsey, that they could be seen. There was,
unfortunately, no private telepathic party line among them.
He
wondered if Halsey hoped someone would notice him and get in touch. He wondered
if Halsey even suspected there were others like himself. He wondered if anyone
had noticed him, when Gus Kusevic's name had been in the
papers occasionally.
It's
the dawn of my race, he thought. The first generation—or is it, and does it
matter?—and I wonder where the females are.
He turned back to the clerk. "I want
what I paid for the place," he said. "No more."
The
clerk's eyes widened slightly, then relaxed, and he shrugged. "Suit
yourself. But if it was me, I'd soak the government good."
Yes,
Gus thought, you doubtless would. But I don't want to, because you simply
don't-take candy from babies.
So
the superman packed his bags and got out of the human's way. Gus choked a
silent laugh. The damping field. The damping-field. The thrice-cursed,
ever-benevolent, foolproof, autonomic, protective damping field.
Evolution
had, unfortunately, not yet realized that there was such a thing as human
society. It produced a being with a certain modification from the human stock,
thereby arriving at practical psi. In order to protect this feeble new species,
whose members were so terribly sparse, it gave them the perfect camouflage.
Result:
When young Augustin Kusevic was enrolled in . school, it was discovered that he
had no birth certificate. No hospital recalled his birth. As a matter of brutal
fact, his human parents sometimes forgot his existence for days at a time.
Result:
When young Gussie Kusevic tried to enter high school, it was discovered that he
had never entered grammar school. No matter that he could quote teachers'
names, textbooks, or classroom numbers. No matter if he could produce report
cards. They were misfiled, and the anguished interviews forgotten. No one
doubted his existence—people remembered the fact of his being, and the fact of
his having acted and being acted upon. But only as though they had read it in
some infinitely boring book.
He
had no friends, no girl, no past, no present, no love. He had no place to
stand. Had there been such things as ghosts, he would have found his fellowship
there.
By
the time of his adolescence, he had discovered an absolute lack of involvement
with the human race. He studied it, because it was the salient feature of his
environment. He did not live with it. It said nothing to him that was of
personal value; its motivations, morals, manners and morale did not find
responsive reactions in him. And his, of course, made absolutely no impression
on it.
The
life of the peasant of ancient Babylon is of interest to only a few historical
anthropologists, none of whom actually want to be Babylonian peasants.
Having
solved the human social equation from his dispassionate viewpoint, and caring
no more than the naturalist who finds that deer are extremely fond of green
aspen leaves, he plunged into physical release. He discovered the thrill of
picking fights and winning them; of making somebody
pay attention to him by smashing his nose.
He
might have become a permanent fixture on the Manhattan docks, if another
longshoreman hadn't slashed him with a carton knife. The cultural demand on him
had been plain. He'd had to kill the man.
That
had been the end of unregulated personal combat. He discovered, not to his
horror but to his disgust, that he could get away with murder. No investigation
had been made; no search was attempted.
So
that had been the end of that, but it had led him to the only possible evasion
of the trap to which he had been born. Intellectual competition being
meaningless, organized sports became the only answer. Simultaneously regulating
his efforts and annotating them under a mound of journalistic record-keeping,
they furnished the first official continuity his life had ever known. People
still forgot his accomplishments, but when they turned to the records, his name
was undeniably there. A dossier can be misfiled. School records can disappear.
But something more than a damping field was required to shunt aside the
mountain of news copy and statistics that drags, ball-like, at the ankle of
even the mediocre athlete.
It
seemed to Gus—and he thought of it a great deal—that this chain of progression
was inevitable for any male of his kind. When, three years ago, he had
discovered Halsey, his hypothesis was bolstered. But what good was Halsey to
another male? To hold mutual consolation sessions with? He had no intention of
ever contacting the man.
The clerk cleared his throat. Gus jerked his
head around to look at him, startled. He'd forgotten him.
"Well,
guess I'll be going. Remember, you've only got two months."
Gus
gestured noncommittally. The man had delivered his message. Why didn't he
acknowledge he'd served his purpose, and go?
Gus
smiled ruefully. What purpose did homo nonde-scriptus serve, and where was he going? Halsey was already walking downhill along
the well-marked trail. Were
there others? If so, then
they were in another rut, somewhere, and not even the tops of their heads
showed. He and his kind could recognize each other only by an elaborate process
of elimination; they had to watch for the people no one noticed.
He
opened the door for the clerk, saw the road, and found his thoughts back with
the highway.
The
highway would run from Hollister, which was a railroad junction, to the Air
Force Base at Farnham, where his calculations in sociomathematics had long ago
predicted the first starship would be constructed and launched. The trucks
would rumble up the highway, feeding the open maw with men and material.
He
cleaned his lips. Up there in space, somewhere; somewhere outside the Solar
System, was another race. The imprint of their visits here was plain. The
humans would encounter them, and again he could predict the result; the humans
would win.
Gus
Kusevic could not go along to investigate the challenges that he doubted lay
among the stars. Even with scrapbooks full of notices and clippings, he had
barely made his career penetrate the public consciousness. Halsey, who had
exuberantly broken every baseball record in the books, was known as a
"pretty fair country pitcher."
What
credentials could he present with his application to the Air Force? Who would
remember them the next day if he had any? What would become of the records of
his inoculations, his physical check-ups, his training courses? Who would
remember to reserve a bunk for him, or stow supplies for him, or add his
consumption to the total when the time came to allow for oxygen?
Stow
away? Nothing easier. But, again; who would die so he could live within the
tight lattice of shipboard economy? Which sheep would he slaughter, and to
what useful purpose, in the last analysis?
"Well, so long,"
the clerk said.
"Good-by," Gus
said.
The
clerk walked down the flagstones and out to his flivver.
I think, Gus said to himself, it would have
been much better for us if Evolution had been a little less protective and a
little more thoughtful. An occasional pogrom wouldn't have done us any harm. A
ghetto at least keeps the' courtship problem solved.
Our seed has been spilt on
the ground.
Suddenly,
Gus ran forward, pushed by something he didn't care to name. He looked up
through the flivver's open door, and the clerk looked down apprehensively.
"Danvers, you're a sports fan," Gus
said hastily, realizing his voice was too urgent; that he was startling the
clerk with his intensity.
"That's right," the clerk answered,
pushing himself nervously back along the seat.
"Who's heavyweight
champion of the world?"
"Mike Frazier.
Why?"
"Who'd
he beat for the title? Who used to be champion?"
The
clerk pursed his lips. "Huh! It's been years— Gee, I don't know. I don't
remember. I could look it up, I guess."
Gus
exhaled slowly. He half-turned and looked back toward the cottage, the lawn,
the flower beds, the walk, the arbor, and the fish pond under the willow tree.
"Never mind," he said, and walked back into the house while the clerk
wobbled his flivver into the air.
The
TV set was blaring with sound. He checked the status of the game.
It
had gone quickly. Halsey had pitched a one-hitter so far, and the Giants'
pitcher had done almost as well. The score was tied at 1-1, the Giants were at bat, and it was the last out in the ninth inning. The
camera boomed in on Halsey's face.
Halsey
looked at the batter with complete disinterest in his eyes, wound up, and threw
the home-run ball.
THE PRIZE
OF PERIL
Robert Sheckley
Robert
Sheckley was born in New York City in 1928, but grew
up In Maplewood, N. J. After high school, he spent two years in Korea with the
occupation forces, then enrolled in N.Y.U. in 1948; graduated in '51, and sold
his first story the same year; published ten stories in '52, and close to fifty
in '53. His first book, Untouched by Human Hands, was published in 1954, and he has hardly slowed down since, although his
short-story production tapered off sharply after 1957, in favor of novels and
scriptwriting. He has now published 17 books, among them The Game of X, a spy
novel, and Mlndswap
(Delacorte, 1966). His
television and film credits include The People Trap, and
The Tenth Victim,
which he wrote twice------- as a short story, "The
Seventh
Victim", in 1953, and as a "novelization" of the film based on
the first version. Three other stories are now being filmed, and a new novel. Maze of
Mirrors, will
be published by Delacorte in 1968.
"The Prize of Peril" was reprinted
in the 4th SF Annual, from Fantasy &
Science Fiction,
May, 1958.
Raeder lifted his
head cautiously
above the window sill. He
saw the fire escape, and below it a narrow alley. There was a weatherbeaten
baby carriage in the alley, and three garbage cans. As he watched, a
black-sleeved arm moved from behind the farthest can, with something shiny in
its fist. Raeder ducked down. A bullet smashed through the window above his
head and punctured the ceiling, showering him with plaster.
Now
he knew about the alley. It was guarded, just like the door.
He
lay at full length on the cracked linoleum, staring at the bullet hole in the
ceiling, listening to the sounds outside the door. He was a tall man with
bloodshot eyes and a two-day stubble. Grime and fatigue had etched lines into
his face. Fear had touched his features, tightening a muscle here and twitching
a nerve there. The results were startling. His face had character now, for it
was reshaped by the expectation of death.
There was a gunman in the alley and two on
the stairs. He was trapped. He was dead.
Sure, Raeder thought, he still moved and
breathed; but that was only because of death's inefficiency. Death would take
care of him in a few minutes. Death would poke holes in his face and body,
artistically dab his clothes with blood, arrange his limbs in some grotesque
position of the graveyard ballet . . . Raeder bit his Up sharply. He wanted to
live. There had to be a way.
He rolled onto his stomach and surveyed the
dingy cold-water apartment into which the killers had driven him. It was a
perfect little one-room coffin. It had a door, which was watched, and a fire
escape, which was watched. And it had a tiny windowless bathroom.
He
crawled to the bathroom and stood up. There was a ragged hole in the ceiling,
almost four inches wide. If he could enlarge it, crawl through into the
apartment above...
He
heard a muffled thud. The killers were impatient. They were beginning to break
down the door.
He
studied the hole in the ceiling. No use even considering it. He could never
enlarge it in time.
They were smashing against the door, grunting
each time
they struck. Soon the lock would tear out, or the hinges
would pull out of the rotting wood. The door would go
down, and the two blank-faced men would enter, dusting
off their jackets____
But
surely someone would help him! He took the tiny television set from his pocket.
The picture was blurred, and he didn't bother to adjust it. The audio was clear
and precise.
He
listened to the well-modulated voice of Mike Terry addressing his vast
audience.
". . . terrible spot," Terry was saying. "Yes, folks, Jim Raeder is in a truly
terrible predicament. He had been hiding, you'll remember, in a third-rate
Broadway hotel under an assumed name. It seemed safe enough. But the bellhop
recognized him, and gave that information to the Thompson gang."
The
door creaked under repeated blows. Raeder clutched the little television set
and listened.
"Jim Raeder just managed to escape from the hotel!
Closely
pursued, he entered a brownstone at one fifty-six West End Avenue. His
intention was to go over the roofs. And it might have worked, folks, it just
might have worked. But the roof door was locked. It looked like the end. . . .
But Raeder found that apartment seven was unoccupied and unlocked. He entered .
. ."
Terry
paused for emphasis, then cried: "—and now he's trapped there, trapped like a rat in a cagel The Thompson
gang is breaking down the door! The fire escape is guarded! Our camera crew,
situated in a near-by building, is giving you a closeup now. Look, folks, just
look! Is there no hope for Jim Raeder?"
Is
there no hope? Raeder
silently echoed, perspiration pouring from him as he stood in the dark,
stifling little bathroom, listening to the steady thud against the door.
"Wait
a minute!" Mike
Terry cried. "Hang
on, Jim Raeder, hang on a little longer. Perhaps there is hope! I have an urgent call from one of our viewers, a call on the Good
Samaritan Line! Here's someone who thinks he can help you, Jim. Are you
listening, Jim Raeder?"
Raeder waited, and heard the hinges tearing
out of rotten wood.
"Go
right ahead, sir," said Mike Terry. "What
is your name, sir?"
"Er—Felix Bartholemow."
"Don't be nervous, Mr.
Bartholemow. Go right ahead."
"Well,
OK. Mr. Raeder," said
an old man's shaking voice, "I used to live at one five six West End Avenue. Same apartment
you're trapped in, Mr. Raeder—fact! Look, that bathroom has got a window, Mr. Raeder. It's been painted over, but it has got a—"
Raeder pushed the television set into his
pocket. He located the outlines of the window and kicked. Glass shattered,
and daylight poured startlingly in. He cleared the jagged sill and quickly
peered down.
Below was a long drop to a
concrete courtyard.
The
hinges tore free. He heard the door opening. Quickly Raeder climbed through the
window, hung by his fingertips for a moment, and dropped.
The
shock was stunning. Groggily he stood up. A face appeared at the bathroom
window.
"Tough luck," said the man, leaning
out and taking careful aim with a snub-nosed .38.
At that moment a smoke bomb exploded inside
the bathroom.
The killer's shot went wide. He turned,
cursing. More smoke bombs burst in the courtyard, obscuring Raeder's figure.
He could hear Mike Terry's frenzied voice
over the TV set in his pocket. "Now run for it!" Terry was screaming. "Run, Jim Raeder, run for your life. Run now, while the killer's eyes are filled with smoke. And thank Good Samaritan
Sarah Winters, of three four one two Edgar Street, Brockton, Mass., for
donating five smoke bombs and employing the services of a man to throw
them!"
In a
quieter voice, Terry continued: "You've saved a man's life today, Mrs. Winters. Would you tell our
audience how it—"
Raeder wasn't able to hear any more. He was
running through the smoke-filled courtyard, past clotheslines, into the open
street.
He
walked down 63d Street, slouching to minimize his height, staggering slightly
from exertion, dizzy from lack of food and sleep.
"Hey you!"
Raeder
turned. A middle-aged woman was sitting on the steps of a brownstone, frowning
at him.
"You're
Raeder, aren't you? The one they're trying to kill?"
Raeder started to walk
away.
"Come inside here,
Raeder," the woman said.
Perhaps
it was a trap. But Raeder knew that he had to depend upon the generosity and
goodheartedness of the people. He was their representative, a projection of
themselves, an average guy in trouble. Without them, he was lost. With them,
nothing could harm him.
Trust
in the people, Mike Terry had told him. They'll never let you down.
He
followed the woman into her parlor. She told him to sit down and left the room,
returning almost immediately with a plate of stew. She stood watching him while
he ate, as one would watch an ape in the zoo eat peanuts.
Two children came out of the kitchen and
stared at him.
Three
overalled men came out of the bedroom and focused a television camera on him.
There was a big television set in the parlor. As he gulped his food, Raeder
watched the image of Mike Terry, and listened to the man's strong, sincere,
worried voice.
"There he is, folks," Terry was saying. "There's Jim Raeder now, eating his
first square meal in two days. Our camera crews have really been working to
cover this for you! Thanks, boys. . . . Folks, Jim Raeder has been given a
brief sanctuary by Mrs. Velma O'Dell, of three forty-three Sixty-Third Street.
Thank you, Good Samaritan O'Dell! It's really wonderful how people from all
walks of life have taken Jim Raeder to their hearts!"
"You better
hurry," Mrs. O'Dell said.
"Yes, ma'am,"
Raeder said.
"I don't want no
gunplay in my apartment."
"I'm almost finished,
ma'am."
One
of the children asked, "Aren't they going to kill him?"
"Shut up," said
Mrs. O'Dell.
"Yes, Jim," chanted Mike Terry, "you'd better hurry. Your killers aren't
far behind. They aren't stupid men, Jim. Vicious, warped, insane—yes! But not
stupid. They're following a trail of
blood—blood from your torn hand, Jim!"
Raeder hadn't realized until now that he'd
cut his hand on the window sill.
"Here,
I'll bandage that," Mrs. O'Dell said. Raeder stood up and let her bandage
his hand. Then she gave him a brown jacket and a gray slouch hat.
"My husband's
stuff," she said.
"He has a disguise, folks!" Mike Terry cried delightedly. "This is something new! A disguise! With seven hours to go until he's safe!"
"Now get out of
here," Mrs. O'Dell said.
"I'm going,
ma'am," Raeder said. "Thanks."
"I
think you're stupid," she said. "I think you're stupid to be involved
in this."
"Yes, ma'am."
"It just isn't worth
it,"
Raeder
thanked her and left. He walked to Broadway, caught a subway to 59th Street,
then an uptown local to
86th.
There he bought a newspaper and changed for the Manhassett through-express.
He
glanced at his watch. He had six and a half hours to go.
The subway roared under Manhattan. Raeder
dozed, his bandaged hand concealed under the newspaper, the hat pulled over his
face. Had he been recognized yet? Had he shaken the Thompson gang? Or was someone
telephoning them now?
Dreamily
he wondered if he had escaped death. Or was he still a cleverly animated
corpse, moving around because of death's inefficiency? (My dear, death is so laggard these days! Jim Raeder walked about for hours
after he died, and actually answered people's questions before he could be decently buried!)
Raeder's
eyes snapped open. He had dreamed something ...
unpleasant. He couldn't remember what.
He closed his eyes again and remembered, with
mild astonishment, a time when he had been in no trouble.
That
was two years ago. He had been a big, pleasant young man working as a truck
driver's helper. He had no talents. He was too modest to have dreams.
The
tight-faced little truck driver had the dreams for him. "Why not try for a
television show, Jim? I would if I had your looks. They like nice average guys
with nothing much on the ball. As contestants. Everybody likes guys like that.
Why not look into it?"
So
he had looked into it. The owner of the local television store had explained
it further.
"You
see, Jim, the public is sick of highly trained athletes with their trick
reflexes and their professional courage. Who can feel for guys like that? Who
can identify? People want to watch exciting things, sure. But not when some
joker is making it his business for fifty thousand a year. That's why organized
sports are in a slump. That's why the thrill shows are booming."
"I see," said Raeder.
"Six
years ago, Jim, Congress passed the Voluntary Suicide Act. Those old senators
talked a lot about free will and self-determinism at the time. But that's all
crap. You know what the Act really means? It means that amateurs can risk their
lives for the big loot, not just professionals. In the old days you had to be a
professional boxer or footballer or hockey player if you wanted your brains
beaten out legally for money. But now that opportunity is open to ordinary
people like you, Jim." "I see," Raeder said again.
"It's
a marvelous opportunity. Take you. You're no better than anyone, Jim. Anything
you can do, anyone can do. You're average. I
think the thrill shows would go for you."
Raeder
permitted himself to dream. Television shows looked like a sure road to riches
for a pleasant young fellow with no particular talent or training. He wrote a letter
to a show called Hazard
and enclosed a photograph
of himself.
Hazard
was interested in him. The
JBC network investigated, and found that he was average enough to satisfy the
wariest viewer. His parentage and affiliations were checked. At last he was
summoned to New York, and interviewed by Mr. Moulian.
Moulian
was dark and intense, and chewed gum as he talked. "You'll do," he
snapped. "But not for Hazard. You'll
appear on Spills.
It's a half-hour daytime
show on Channel Three."
"Gee," said
Raeder.
"Don't
thank me. There's a thousand dollars if you win or place second, and a
consolation prize of a hundred dollars if you lose. But that's not
important."
"No, sir."
"Spills
is a little show. The JBC network uses it as a testing
ground. First- and second-place winners on Spills move on to Emergency. The prizes are much bigger on Emergency."
"I know they are,
sir."
"And
if you do well on Emergency
there are the first-class
thrill shows, like Hazard
and Underwater Perils, with their nationwide coverage and enormous
prizes. And then comes the really big time. How far you go is up to you."
"I'll do my best,
sir," Raeder said.
Moulian
stopped chewing gum for a moment and said, almost reverently, "You can do
it, Jim. Just remember. You're the people, and the people can do anything."
The way he said it made Raeder feel
momentarily sorry for Mr. Moulian, who was dark and frizzy-haired and pop-eyed,
and was obviously not the
people.
They
shook hands. Then Raeder signed a paper absolving the JBC of all responsibility should he lose his life, limbs or reason during
the contest. And he signed another paper exercising his rights under the
Voluntary Suicide Act. The law required this, and it was a mere formality.
In three weeks, he appeared
on Spills.
The
program followed the classic form of the automobile race. Untrained drivers
climbed into powerful American and European competition cars and raced over a
murderous twenty-mile course. Raeder was shaking with fear as he slid his big
Maserati into the wrong gear and took off.
The
race was a screaming, tire-burning nightmare. Raeder stayed back, letting the
early leaders smash themselves up on the counter-banked hairpin turns. He crept
into third place when a Jaguar in front of him swerved against an Alfa-Romeo,
and the two cars roared into a plowed field. Raeder gunned for second place on
the last three miles, but couldn't find passing room. An S-curve almost took
him, but he fought the car back on the road, still holding third. Then the lead
driver broke a crankshaft in the final fifty yards, and Jim ended in second
place.
He
was now a thousand dollars ahead. He received four fan letters, and a lady in
Oshkosh sent him a pair of argyles. He was invited to appear on Emergency.
Unlike
the others, Emergency
was not a competition-type
program. It stressed individual initiative: For the show, Raeder was knocked
out with a non-habit-forming narcotic. He awoke in the cockpit of a small
airplane, cruising on autopilot at ten thousand feet. His fuel gauge showed
nearly empty. He had no parachute. He was supposed to land the plane.
Of course, he had never
flown before.
He
experimented gingerly with the controls, remembering that last week's
participant had recovered consciousness in a submarine, had opened the wrong
valve, and had drowned.
Thousands of viewers watched spellbound as this
average man, a man just like themselves, struggled with the situation just as
they would do. Jim Raeder was them. Anything
he could do, they could do. He was representative of the people.
Raeder managed to bring the ship down in some
semblance of a landing. He flipped over a few times, but his seat belt held.
And the engine, contrary to expectation, did not burst into flames.
He staggered out with two broken ribs, three
thousand dollars, and a chance, when he healed, to appear on Torero.
At
last, a first-class thrill show! Torero paid
ten thousand dollars. All you had to do was kill a black Miura bull with a
sword, just like a real trained matador.
The
fight was held in Madrid, since bullfighting was still illegal in the United
States. It was nationally televised.
Raeder
had a good cuadrilla.
They liked the big,
slow-moving American. The picadors really leaned into their lances, trying to
slow the bull for him. The banderilleros tried
to run the beast off his feet before driving in their banderillas. And the second matador, a mournful man from
Algeciras, almost broke the bull's neck with fancy cape work.
But
when all was said and done it was Jim Raeder on the sand, a red muleta clumsily gripped in his left hand, a sword in
his right, facing a ton of black, blood-streaked, wide-horned bull.
Someone
was shouting, "Try for the lung, hombre. Don't
be a hero, stick him in the lung." But Jim only knew what the technical
adviser in New York had told him: Aim with the sword and go in over the horns.
Over
he went. The sword bounced off bone, and the bull tossed him over its back. He
stood up, miraculously un-gouged, took another sword and went over the horns
again with his eyes closed. The god who protects children and fools must have
been watching, for the sword slid in like a needle through butter, and the bull
looked startled, stared at him unbelievingly, and dropped like a deflated
balloon.
They
paid him ten thousand dollars, and his broken collar bone healed in
practically no time. He received twenty-three fan letters, including a
passionate invitation from a girl in Atlantic City, which he ignored. And they
asked him if he wanted to appear on another show.
He
had lost some of his innocence. He was now fully aware that he had been almost
killed for pocket money. The big loot lay ahead. Now he wanted to be almost
killed for something worthwhile.
So
he appeared on Underwater
Perils, sponsored
by Fair-lady's Soap. In face mask, respirator, weighted belt, flippers and
knife, he slipped into the warm waters of the Caribbean with four other
contestants, followed by a cage-protected camera crew. The idea was to locate
and bring up a treasure which the sponsor had hidden there.
Mask
diving isn't especially hazardous. But the sponsor had added some frills for
public interest. The area was sown with giant clams, moray eels, sharks of
several species, giant octopuses, poison coral, and other dangers of the deep.
It was a stirring contest. A man from Florida
found the treasure in a deep crevice, but a moray eel found him. Another diver
took the treasure, and a shark took him. The brilliant blue-green water became
cloudy with blood, which photographed well on color TV. The treasure slipped to
the bottom and Raeder plunged after it, popping an eardrum in the process. He
plucked it from the coral, jettisoned his weighted belt and made for the
surface. Thirty feet from the top he had to fight another diver for the
treasure.
They
feinted back and forth with their knives. The man struck, slashing Raeder
across the chest. But Raeder, with the self-possession of an old contestant,
dropped his knife and tore the man's respirator out of his mouth.
That
did it. Raeder surfaced, and presented the treasure at the stand-by boat. It
turned out to be a package of Fair-lady's Soap—"The Greatest Treasure of
All."
That
netted him twenty-two thousand dollars in cash and prizes, and three hundred
and eight fan letters, and an interesting proposition from a girl in Macon,
which he seriously considered. He received free hospitalization for his knife
slash and burst eardrum, and injections for coral infection.
But best of all, he was invited to appear on
the biggest of the thrill shows, The Prize of Peril.
And that was when the real trouble began. . .
.
The
subway came to a stop, jolting him out of his reverie. Raeder pushed back his
hat and observed, across the aisle, a man staring at him and whispering
to a stout woman. Had they recognized him7
He stood up as soon as the doors opened, and
glanced at his watch. He had five hours to go.
At the Manhasset station he stepped into a
taxi and told the driver to take him to New Salem.
"New
Salem?" the driver asked, looking at him in the rear vision mirror.
"That's right."
The driver snapped on his radio. "Fare
to New Salem. Yep, that's right. New Salem."
They
drove off. Raeder frowned, wondering if it had been a signal. It was perfectly
usual for taxi drivers to report to their dispatchers, of course. But
something about the man's voice. . .
"Let me off
here," Raeder said.
He
paid the driver and began walking down a narrow country road that curved
through sparse woods. The trees were too small and too widely separated for
shelter. Raeder walked on, looking for a place to hide.
There
was a heavy truck approaching. He kept on walking, pulling his hat low on his
forehead. But as the truck drew near, he heard a voice from the television set
in his pocket. It cried, "Watch out!"
He
flung himself into the ditch. The truck careened past, narrowly missing him,
and screeched to a stop. The driver was shouting, "There he goes! Shoot,
Harry, shoot!"
Bullets
clipped leaves from the trees as Raeder sprinted into the woods.
"It's
happened again!" Mike
Terry was saying, his voice high-pitched with excitement. "I'm afraid Jim Raeder let himself be
lulled into a false sense of
security. You can't do that, Jim! Not with your life at stake! Not with killers pursuing
you! Be careful, Jim, you still have four and a half hours to go!"
The
driver was saying, "Claude, Harry, go around with the truck. We got him
boxed."
"They've
got you boxed, Jim Raeder!" Mike Terry cried. "But they haven't got you yet! And you can thank Good Samaritan
Susy Peters of twelve Elm Street,
South Orange, New Jersey, for that warning shout just when the truck was
bearing down on you. We'll have little Susy on stage in just a moment.... Look, folks, our
studio helicopter has arrived on the scene. Now you can see Jim Raeder
running, and the killers pursuing, surrounding him ..."
Raeder
ran through a hundred yards of woods and found himself on a concrete highway,
with open woods beyond. One of the killers was trotting through the woods
behind him. The truck had driven to a connecting road, and was now a mile away,
coming toward him.
A
car was approaching from the other direction. Raeder ran into the highway,
waving frantically. The car came to a stop.
"Hurry!" cried the blond young
woman driving it.
Raeder
dived in. The woman made a U-turn on the highway. A bullet smashed through the
windshield. She stamped on the accelerator, almost running down the lone killer
who stood in the way.
The
car surged away before the truck was within firing range.
Raeder
leaned back and shut his eyes tightly. The woman concentrated on her driving,
watching for the truck in her rear-vision mirror.
"Ifs
happened again!" cried
Mike Terry, his voice ecstatic. "Jim Raeder has been plucked again from the jaws of death, thanks to Good Samaritan Janice
Morrow of four three three Lexington
Avenue, New York City. Did you ever see anything like it, folks? The way Miss
Morrow drove through a fusillade of
bullets and plucked Jim Raeder from the mouth of
doom! Later we'll interview Miss Morrow and get her reactions. Now, while Jim
Raeder speeds away— perhaps to safety, perhaps to further peril—we'll have a
short announcement from our sponsor. Don't go away! Jim's got four hours and
ten minutes until he's safe. Anything can
happen!"
"OK,"
the girl said. "We're off the air now. Raeder, what in the hell is the
matter with you?"
"Eh?"
Raeder asked. The girl was in her early twenties. She looked efficient,
attractive, untouchable. Raeder noticed that she had good features, a trim
figure. And he noticed that she seemed angry.
"Miss," he said,
"I don't know how to thank you for—"
"Talk
straight," Janice Morrow said. "I'm no Good Samaritan. I'm employed
by the JBC network."
"So
the program had me rescued!" "Cleverly reasoned," she said.
"But why?"
"Look, this is an expensive show,
Raeder. We have to turn in a good performance. If our rating slips, we'll all
be in the street selling candy apples. And you aren't cooperating."
"What?
Why?"
"Because you're terrible," the girl
said bitterly. "You're a flop, a fiasco. Are you trying to commit suicide?
Haven't you learned anything
about survival?"
"I'm
doing the best I can."
"The Thompsons could have had you a
dozen times by now. We told them to take it easy, stretch it out. But it's like
shooting a clay pigeon six feet tall. The Thompsons are co-operating, but they
can only fake so far. If I hadn't come along, they'd have had to kill
you—air-time or not."
Raeder
stared at her, wondering how such a pretty girl could talk that way. She
glanced at him, then quickly looked back to the road.
"Don't
give me that look!" she said. "You chose
to risk your life for money, buster. And plenty of money! You knew the score.
Don't act like some innocent little grocer who finds the nasty hoods are after
him. That's a different plot."
"I
know," Raeder said.
"If
you can't live well, at least try to die well."
"You
don't mean that," Raeder said.
"Don't
be too sure. ... You've got three
hours and forty minutes until the end of the show. If you can stay alive, fine.
The boodle's yours. But if you can't, at least try to give them a run for the
money."
Raeder
nodded, staring intently at her.
"In
a few moments we're back on the air. I develop engine trouble, let you off.
The Thompsons go all out now. They kill you when and if they can, as soon as
they can. Understand?"
"Yes,"
Raeder said. "If I make it, can I see you some time?"
She
bit her lip angrily. "Are you trying to kid me?" "No. I'd like to
see you again. May I?"
She looked at him curiously. "I don't
know. Forget it. We're almost on. I think your best bet is the woods to the
right. Ready?"
"Yes. Where can I get in touch with you?
Afterward, I mean."
"Oh, Raeder, you aren't paying
attention. Go through the woods until you find a washed-out ravine. It isn't
much, but it'll give you some cover."
"Where can I get in touch with
you?" Raeder asked again.
"I'm in the Manhattan telephone
book." She stopped the car. "OK, Raeder, start running." He opened
the door.
"Wait," she leaned over and kissed
him on the lips. "Good luck, you idiot. Call me if you make it." And
then he was on foot, running into the woods.
He ran through birch and pine, past an
occasional split-level house with staring faces at the big picture window. Some
occupant of those houses must have called the gang, for they were close behind him
when he reached the washed-out little ravine. Those quiet, mannerly,
law-abiding people didn't want him to escape, Raeder thought sadly. They wanted
to see a killing. Or perhaps they wanted to see him narrowly escape a killing.
It came to the same thing,
really.
He
entered the ravine, burrowed into the thick underbrush and lay still. The
Thompsons appeared on both ridges, moving slowly, watching for any movement.
.Raeder held his breath as they came parallel to him.
He
heard the quick explosion of a revolver. But the killer had only shot a
squirrel. It squirmed for a moment, then lay still.
Lying
in the underbrush, Raeder heard the studio helicopter overhead. He wondered if
any cameras were focused on him. It was possible. And if someone were watching,
perhaps some Good Samaritan would help.
So
looking upward, toward the helicopter, Raeder arranged his face in a reverent
expression, clasped his hands and prayed. He prayed silently, for the audience
didn't like religious ostentation. But his hps moved. That was every man's
privilege.
And a real prayer was on his lips. Once, a
lip-reader in the audience had detected a fugitive pretending to pray, but actually just reciting
multiplication tables. No help for that man!
Raeder
finished his prayer. Glancing at his watch, he saw that he had nearly two hours
to go.
And
he didn't want to die! It wasn't worth it, no matter how much they paid! He
must have been crazy, absolutely insane to agree to such a thing....
But
he knew that wasn't true. And he remembered just how sane he had been.
One week ago he had been on the Prize of
Peril stage, blinking in
the spotlight, and Mike Terry had shaken his hand.
"Now, Mr. Raeder," Terry had said
solemnly, "do you understand the rules of the game you are about to
play?" Raeder nodded.
"If you accept, Jim Raeder, you will be
a hunted man for a week. Killers will follow you, Jim. Trained killers, men wanted by the law for other
crimes, granted immunity for this single killing under the Voluntary Suicide
Act. They will be trying to kill you, Jim.
Do you understand?"
"I
understand," Raeder said. He also understood the two hundred thousand
dollars he would receive if he could live out the week.
"I
ask you again, Jim Raeder. We force no man to play for stakes of death."
"I want to play,"
Raeder said.
Mike
Terry turned to the audience. "Ladies and gentlemen, I have here a copy
of an exhaustive psychological test which an impartial psychological testing
firm made on Jim Raeder at our request. Copies will be sent to anyone who
desires them for twenty-five cents to cover the cost of mailing. The test shows
that Jim Raeder is sane, well-balanced, and fully responsible in every
way." He turned to Raeder. "Do you still want to enter the contest,
Jim?"
"Yes, I do."
"Very
well!" cried Mike Terry. "Jim Raeder, meet your would-be killers!"
The
Thompson gang moved on stage, booed by the audience.
"Look at them, folks," said Mike
Terry, with undisguised contempt. "Just look at them! Antisocial,
thoroughly vicious, completely amoral. These men have no code but the
criminal's warped code, no honor but the honor of the cowardly hired killer.
They are doomed men, doomed by our society which will not sanction their
activities for long, fated to an early and unglamorous death."
The audience shouted
enthusiastically.
"What
have you to say, Claude Thompson?" Terry asked.
Claude,
the spokesman of the Thompsons, stepped up to the microphone. He was a thin,
clean-shaven man, conservatively dressed.
"I
figure," Claude Thompson said hoarsely, "I figure we're no worse than
anybody. I mean, like soldiers in a war, they kill.
And look at the graft in government, and the unions. Everybody's got their
graft."
That
was Thompson's tenuous code. But how quickly, with what precision, Mike Terry
destroyed the killer's rationalizations! Terry's questions pierced straight to
the filthy soul of the man.
At
the end of the interview Claude Thompson was perspiring, mopping his face with
a silk handkerchief and casting quick glances at his men.
Mike
Terry put a hand on Raeder's shoulder. "Here is the man who has agreed to
become your victim—if you can catch him."
"We'll
catch him," Thompson said, his confidence returning.
"Don't
be too sure," said Terry. "Jim Raeder has fought wild bulls—now he
battles jackals. He's an average man. He's the people—who mean ultimate doom to you and your
kind."
"We'll get him,"
Thompson said.
"And
one thing more," Terry said, very softly. "Jim Raeder does not stand
alone. The folks of America are for him. Good Samaritans from all corners of
our great nation stand ready to assist him. Unarmed, defenseless, Jim Raeder
can count on the aid and goodheartedness of the people, whose representative he is. So don't be too
sure, Claude Thompson! The average men are for Jim Raeder— and there are a lot
of average men!"
Raeder thought about it, lying motionless in
the underbrush. Yes, the
people had
helped him. But they had helped the killers, too.
A
tremor ran through him. He had chosen, he reminded himself. He alone was
responsible. The psychological test had proved that.
And
yet, how responsible were the psychologists who had given him the test?
How responsible was Mike Terry for offering a poor man so much money? Society
had woven the noose and put it around his neck, and he was hanging himself with
it, and calling it free will.
Whose fault?
"Aha!" someone
cried.
Raeder
looked up and saw a portly man standing near him. The man wore a loud tweed
jacket. He had binoculars around his neck, and a cane in his hand.
"Mister," Raeder
whispered, "please don't tell—"
"Hi!"
shouted the portly man, pointing at Raeder with his cane. "Here he
is!"
A
madman, thought Raeder. The damned fool must think he's playing Hare and
Hounds.
"Right over
here!" the man screamed.
Cursing,
Raeder sprang to his feet and began running. He came out of the ravine and saw
a white building in the distance. He turned toward it. Behind him he could
still hear the man.
"That
way, over there. Look, you fools, can't you see him yet?"
The
killers were shooting again. Raeder ran, stumbling over uneven ground, past
three children playing in a tree house.
"Here he is!" the
children screamed. "Here he is!"
Raeder
groaned and ran on. He reached the steps of the building, and saw that it was a
church.
As
he opened the door, a bullet struck him behind the right kneecap.
He fell, and crawled inside the church.
The
television set in his pocket was saying, "What a finish, folks, what a finish! Raedefs been hit! He's been
hit, folks, he's crawling now, he's in pain, but he hasn't given up! Not Jim
Raeder!"
Raeder lay in the aisle near the altar. He
could hear a child's eager voice saying, "He went in there, Mr. Thompson.
Hurry, you can still catch him!"
Wasn't
a church considered a sanctuary? Raeder wondered.
Then
the door was flung open, and Raeder realized that the custom was no longer
observed. He gathered himself together and crawled past the altar, out the back
door of the church.
He
was in an old graveyard. He crawled past crosses and stars, past slabs of
marble and granite, past stone tombs and rude wooden markers. A bullet exploded
on a tombstone near his head, showering him with fragments. He crawled to the
edge of an open grave.
They
had received him, he thought. All of those nice average normal people. Hadn't
they said he was their representative? Hadn't they sworn to protect their own?
But no, they loathed him. Why hadn't he seen it? Their hero was the cold,
blank-eyed gunman, Thompson, Capone, Billy the Kid, Young Lochinvar, El Cid,
Cuchulain, the man without human hopes or fears. They worshiped him, that dead,
implacable, robot gunman, and lusted to feel his foot in their face.
Raeder
tried to move, and slid helplessly into the open grave.
He lay on his back, looking at the blue sky.
Presently a black silhouette loomed above him, blotting out the sky. Metal
twinkled. The silhouette slowly took aim.
And
Raeder gave up all hope forever. "WAIT, THOMPSON!" roared the
amplified voice of Mike Terry.
The revolver wavered.
"It is one second past five o'clock! The week is up! JIM
RAEDER HAS WON!"
There was a pandemonium of cheering from the
studio audience.
The Thompson gang, gathered around the grave,
looked sullen.
"He's won, friends, he's won!" Mike Terry cried. "Look, look on your screen! The police
have arrived, they're taking the Thompsons away from their victim—the victim
they could not kill. And all this is thanks to you, Good Samaritans of America.
Look, folks, tender hands are lifting Jim Raeder from the open grave that was
his final refuge. Good
Samaritan
Janice Morrow is there. Could this be the beginning of a romance? Jim seems to have fainted, friends, they're giving
him a stimulant. He's won two hundred thousand dollars! Now we'll have a few
words from Jim Rae-der!"
There was a short silence.
"That's
odd," said
Mike Terry. "Folks,
I'm afraid we can't hear from Jim just now. The doctors are examining him. Just
one moment..."
There
was a silence. Mike Terry wiped his forehead and smiled.
"It's
the strain, folks, the terrible strain. The doctor tells me . . . Well, folks,
Jim Raeder is temporarily not himself. But it's only temporary! JBC is hiring
the best psychiatrists and psychoanalysts in the country. We're going to do
everything humanly possible for this gallant boy. And entirely at our own
expense."
Mike
Terry glanced at the studio clock. "Well, it's about time to sign off, folks. Watch for the
announcement of our next great thrill
show. And don't worry, I'm sure that very soon we'll have Jim Raeder back with
us."
Mike
Terry smiled, and winked at the audience. "He's bound to get well, friends. After all, we're all pulling for him!"
THE HANDLER
Damon Knight
"The Handler" was selected for the
5th SF Annual from Rogue,
August, 1960.
When the big man came in, there was a movement in the room like a lot
of bird dogs pointing. Piano player quits pounding, the two singing drunks shut
up, all the beautiful people with cocktails in their hands stop talking and
laughing.
"Pete!"
the nearest women shrilled, and he walked straight into the room, arms around
two girls, hugging them tight. "How's my sweetheart? Susy, you look good
enough to eat, but I had it for lunch. George, you pirate"—he let go both
girls, grabbed a bald blushing little man and thumped him on the arm— "you
were great, sweatheart, I mean it, really great. Now HEAR THIS!" he
shouted, over all the voices that were clamoring Pete this, Pete that.
Somebody
put a martini in his hand and he stood holding it, bronzed and tall in his
dinner jacket, teeth gleaming white as his shirt cuffs. "We had a
show!" he told them.
A
shriek of agreement went up, a babble of did we have a show my God Pete listen a show—
He held up his hand. "It was a good
show!"
Another shriek and babble.
"The
sponsor kinda liked it—he just signed for another one in the fall!"
A
shriek, a roar, people clapping, jumping up and down. The big man tried to say
something else, but gave up, grinning, while men and women crowded up to him.
They were all trying to shake his hand, talk in his ear, put their arms around
him.
"I
love ya alll"
he shouted. "Now what
do you say, let's live a little!"
The murmuring started again as people sorted
themselves out. There was a clinking from the bar. "Jesus, Pete," a
skinny pop-eyed little guy was saying, crouching in adoration, "when you
dropped that fishbowl I thought I'd pee myself, honest to God—"
The
big man let out a bark of happy laughter. "Yeah, I can still see the look
on your face. And the fish, flopping all over the stage. So what can I do, I get down there on my knees—" The big man did so, bending over and
staring at imaginary fish on the floor. "And I say, 'Well, fellows, back
to the drawing board!' "
Screams
of laughter as the big man stood up. The party was arranging itself around him
in arcs of concentric circles, with people in the back standing on sofas and
the piano bench so they could see. Somebody yelled, "Sing the goldfish
song, Pete!"
Shouts of approval,
please-do-Pete, the goldfish song.
"Okay,
okay." Grinning, the big man sat on the arm of a chair and raised his
glass. "And a vun, and a doo—vere's de moosic?" A scuffle at the
piano bench. Somebody banged out a few chords. The big man made a comic face
and sang, "Ohhh . . . how I wish ...
I was a little fish . . . and when I want some quail ... I'd flap my little tail."
Laughter,
the girls laughing louder than anybody and their red mouths farther open. One
flushed blonde had her hand on the big man's knee, and another was sitting
close behind him.
"But seriously—"
the big man shouted. More laughter.
"No,
seriously," he said in a vibrant voice as the room quieted, "I want
to tell you in all seriousness I couldn't have done it alone. And incidentally
I see we have some foreigners, litvaks and other members of the press here tonight,
so I want to introduce all the important people. First of all, George here, the
three-fingered band leader—and there isn't a guy in the world could have done
what he did this afternoon—George, I love ya." He hugged the blushing
little bald man.
"Next
my real sweetheart, Ruthie, where are ya. Honey, you were the greatest, really
perfect—I mean it, baby—" He kissed a dark girl in a red dress who cried a
little and hid her face on his broad shoulder. "And Frank—" He
reached down and grabbed the skinny pop-eyed guy by the sleeve. "What can
I tell you? A sweetheart?" The skinny guy was blinking, all choked up; the
big man thumped him on the back. "Sol and Ernie and Mack, my writers,
Shakespeare should have been so lucky—" One by one, they came up to shake the
big man's hand as he called their names; the women kissed him and cried.
"My stand-in," the big man was calling out, and "my caddy,"
and "now," he said, as the room quieted a little, people flushed and
sore-throated with enthusiasm, "I want you to meet my handler."
The room fell silent. The big man looked
thoughtful and startled, as if he had had a sudden pain. Then he stopped
moving. He sat without breathing or blinking his eyes. After a moment there was
a jerky motion behind him. The girl who was sitting on the arm of the chair got
up and moved away. The big man's dinner jacket split open in the back, and a
little man climbed out. He had a perspiring brown face under a shock of black
hair. He was a very small man, almost a dwarf, stoop-shouldered and round-backed
in a sweaty brown singlet and shorts'. He climbed out of the cavity in the big
man's body, and closed the dinner jacket carefully. The big man sat motionless
and his face was doughy.
The
little man got down, wetting his lips nervously. Hello, Fred, a few people
said. "Hello," Fred called, waving his hand. He was about forty, with
a big nose and big soft brown eyes. His voice was cracked and uncertain.
"Well, we sure put on a show, didn't we?"
Sure
did, Fred, they said politely. He wiped his brow with the back of his hand.
"Hot in there," he explained, with an apologetic grin. Yes, I guess
it must be Fred, they said. People around the outskirts of the crowd were beginning
to turn away, form conversational groups; the hum of talk rose higher. "Say,
Tim, I wonder if I could have something to drink," the little man said.
"I don't like to leave him—you know—" He gestured toward the silent
big man.
"Sure, Fred, what'll it be?"
"Oh—you know—a glass of beer?"
Tim brought him a beer in a pilsener glass and
he drank it thirstily, his brown eyes darting nervously from side to side. A
lot of people were sitting down now; one or two were at the door leaving.
"Well,"
the little man said to a passing girl, "Ruthie, that was quite a moment
there, when the fishbowl busted, wasn't it?"
"Huh?
Excuse me, honey. I didn't hear you." She bent nearer.
"Oh—well, it don't
matter. Nothing."
She
patted him on the shoulder once, and took her hand away. "Well, excuse me,
sweetie, I have to catch Robbins before he leaves." She went on toward the
door.
The
little man put his beer glass down and sat, twisting his knobby hands together.
The bald man and the pop-eyed man were the only ones still sitting near him. An
anxious smile flickered on his lips; he glanced at one face, then another.
"Well," he began, "that's one show under our belts, huh,
fellows, but I guess we got to start, you know, thinking about—"
"Listen,
Fred," said the bald man seriously, leaning forward to touch him on the
wrist, "why don't you get back inside?"
The
little man looked at him for a moment with sad hound-dog eyes, then ducked his
head, embarrassed. He stood up uncertainly, swallowed and said,
"Well—" He climbed up on the chair behind the big man, opened the
back of the dinner jacket and put his legs in one at a time. A few people were
watching him, unsmiling. "Thought I'd take it easy a while," he said
weakly, "but I guess—" He reached in and gripped something with both
hands, then swung himself inside. His brown, uncertain face disappeared.
The
big man blinked suddenly and stood up. "Well, hey there," he called, "what's a matter with this party anyway?
Let's see some life, some action—" Faces were lighting up around him.
People began to move in closer. "What I mean, let me hear that beat!"
The
big man began clapping his hands rhythmically. The piano took it up. Other
people began to clap. "What I mean, are we alive or just waiting for the
wagon to pick us up? How's that again, can't hear you!" A roar of pleasure as he cupped his hand to his ear.
"Well, come on,
let
me hear it!" A louder roar. Pete, Pete; a gabble of voices. "I got
nothing against Fred," said the bald man earnestly in the middle of the
noise. "I mean for a square he's a nice guy." "Know what you
mean," said the pop-eyed man, "I mean like he doesn't mean it." "Sure," said the bald man, "but, Jesus, that
sweaty undershirt and all . . ." Then they both burst out laughing as the
big man made a comic face, tongue lolling, eyes crossed. Pete, Pete, Pete; the
room was really jumping; it was a great party, and everything was all right far
into the night.
THE GOLEM
Avram Davidson
Avram Davidson is the author of nine books
(plus one, Joy/eg, in collaboration with Ward Moore) and editor of three, two
of them being the annual collections of The Best from Fantasy & Science Fiction, representing his two years as editor of that
magazine. His first crime story took first prize in the 1957 Ellery Queen's Mystery
Magazine contest,
and in 1962 he edited a fact-crime collection. Crimes and Chaos.
The
title story of his first collection of short stories. Or All the Seas with Oysters, won a "Hugo" in 1958, and was also
included in the 4th SF Annual. (Two others, "Now Let Us
Sleep" and "No Fire Burns" appeared in the 3rd and 5th Annuals.)
His first hardcover collection, and first hardcover novel, Bumberboom, are
both scheduled by Doubleday for this year.
Davidson
says he "was born during the halcyon days of the Millard Filmore
administration; he has one son, Ethan; and now lives at Mon Tsourice, the
family plantation on Mauritius, where he raises dodoes for the export
market." The facts are, he left Yonkers some time after his birth in 1923,
for California, where he studied sheep raising and wrote scholarly articles
until the publication of his first story, "My Boyfriend's Name is
Jello", in 1954.
"The
Golem" was his second story, in Fantasy &
Science Fiction,
March, 1955; it is
reprinted from the 1st SF Annual, and also appeared in Or All the Seas with Oysters.
■ ■■■
The
gray-faced person came
along the street where old Mr. and Mrs. Gumbeiner lived. It was afternoon, it
was autumn, the sun was warm and soothing to their ancient bones. Anyone who
attended the movies in the twenties or the early thirties has seen that street
a thousand times. Past these bungalows with their half-double roofs Edmund
Lowe walked arm-in-arm with Leatrice Joy and Harold Lloyd was chased by
Chinamen waving hatchets. Under these squamous palm trees Laurel kicked Hardy
and Woolsey beat Wheeler upon the head with codfish. Across these
pocket-handkerchief-sized lawns the juveniles of the Our Gang Comedies pursued
one another and were pursued by angry
fat men in golf knickers. On this same street—or perhaps on some other one of
five hundred streets exactly like it.
Mrs.
Gumbeiner indicated the gray-faced person to her husband.
"You
think maybe he's got something the matter?" she asked. "He walks kind
of funny, to me."
"Walks
like a golem," Mr. Gumbeiner said indifferently. The old
woman was nettled.
"Oh,
I don't know," she said. "I think
he walks like your cousin, Mendel."
The
old man pursed his mouth angrily and chewed on his pipestem. The gray-faced
person turned up the concrete path, walked up the steps to the porch, sat down
in a chair. Old Mr. Gumbeiner ignored him. His wife stared at the stranger.
"Man
comes in without a hello, goodby, or howareyou, sits himself down and right
away he's at home. . . . The chair is comfortable?" she asked. "Would
you like maybe a glass tea?"
She turned to her husband.
"Say
something, Gumbeiner!" she demanded. "What are you, made of
wood?"
The old man smiled a slow, wicked, triumphant
smile.
"Why
should I say anything?" he asked the air.
"Who am I? Nothing, that's who."
The stranger spoke. His voice was harsh and
monotonous. "When you learn who—or, rather, what—I am, the flesh will
melt from your bones in terror." He bared porcelain teeth.
"Never
mind about my bones!" the old woman cried. "You've got a lot of nerve
talking about my bones!"
"You
will quake with fear," said the stranger. Old Mrs. Gumbeiner said that she
hoped he would live so long. She turned to her husband once again.
"Gumbeiner, when are you going to mow
the lawn?"
"All mankind—" the stranger began.
"Shah!
I'm talking to my husband. ... He talks eppis kind of funny, Gumbeiner, no?"
"Probably
a foreigner," Mr. Gumbeiner said, complacently.
"You
think so?" Mrs. Gumbeiner glanced fleetingly at the stranger. "He's
got a very bad color in his face, nebbich.
I suppose he came to California for his
health."
"Disease, pain,
sorrow, love, grief—all are nought to—"
Mr. Gumbeiner cut in on the
stranger's statement.
"Gall
bladder,'-' the old man said. "Guinzburg down at the shule looked exactly the same before his operation. Two professors they had in
for him, and a private nurse day and night."
"I am not a human
being!" the stranger said loudly.
"Three
thousand seven hundred fifty dollars it cost his son, Guinzburg told me. 'For you,
Poppa, nothing is too expensive—only get well,' the son told him."
"I am not a human being!"
"Ai,
is that a son for you!" the old woman said, rocking her head. "A
heart of gold, pure gold." She looked at the stranger. "All right,
all right, I heard you the first time. Gumbeiner! I asked you a question. When
are you going to cut the lawn?"
"On
Wednesday, odder
maybe Thursday, comes the
Japaneser to the neighborhood. To cut lawns is his profession. My profession is to be a glazier—retired."
"Between
me and all mankind is an inevitable hatred," the stranger said. "When
I tell you what I am, the flesh will melt—"
"You said, you said already," Mr.
Gumbeiner interrupted.
"In Chicago where the winters were as
cold and bitter as the Czar of Russia's heart," the old woman intoned,
"you had strength to carry the frames with the glass together day in and
day out. But in California with the golden sun to mow the lawn when your wife
asks, for this you have no strength. Do I call in the Japaneser to cook for you
supper?"
"Thirty
years Professor Allardyce spent perfecting his theories. Electronics,
neuronics—"
"Listen,
how educated he talks," Mr. Gumbeiner said, admiringly. "Maybe he
goes to the University here?"
"If
he goes to the University, maybe he knows Bud?" his wife suggested.
"Probably
they're in the same class and he came to see him about the homework, no?"
"Certainly
he must be in the same class. How many classes are there? Five in ganzen: Bud showed me on his program card." She
counted off on her fingers. 'Television
Appreciation and Criticism, Small Boat
Building, Social Adjustment, The American Dance . . . The American Dance—nu,
Gumbeiner—"
"Contemporary
Ceramics," her husband said, relishing the syllables. "A fine boy,
Bud. A pleasure to have him for a boardner."
"After thirty years spent in these
studies," the stranger, who had continued to speak unnoticed, went on,
"he turned from the theoretical to the pragmatic. In ten years' time he
had made the most titanic discovery in history: he made mankind, all mankind, superfluous: he made me."
"What
did Tillie write in her last letter?" asked the old man.
The old woman shrugged.
"What should she write? The same thing.
Sidney was home from the Army, Naomi has a new boy friend—" "He made me!"
"Listen,
Mr. Whatever-your-name-is," the old woman said; "maybe where you came
from is different, but in this country
you don't interrupt people the while they're talking. . . . Hey. Listen—what dó
you mean, he made
you? What kind of talk is
that?"
The
stranger bared all his teeth again, exposing the too-pink gums.
"In
his library, to which I had a more complete access after his sudden and as yet
undiscovered death from entirely natural causes, I found a complete collection
of stories about androids, from Shelley's Frankenstein through Capek's R.U.R. to Asimov's—"
"Frankenstein?"
said the old man, with interest. "There used to be Frankenstein who had
the soda.-wasser place on Halstead Street: a Litvack, nebbich."
"What
are you talking?" Mrs. Gumbeiner demanded. "His name was
Frankenf/ja/, and it wasn't on Halstead, it was on Roosevelt."
"—clearly shown that all
mankind has an instinctive antipathy towards androids and there will be an
inevitable struggle between them—"
"Of
course, of course!" Old Mr. Gumbeiner clicked his teeth against his pipe.
"I am always wrong, you are always right. How could you stand to be
married to such a stupid person all this time?"
"I don't know," the old woman said.
"Sometimes I wonder, myself. I think it must be his good looks." She began to laugh. Old Mr.
Gumbeiner blinked, then began to smile, then took his wife's hand.
"Foolish
old woman," the stranger said; "why do you laugh? Do you not know I have come to destroy you?"
"What!"
old Mr. Gumbeiner shouted. "Close your mouth, you!" He darted from
his chair and struck the stranger with the flat of his hand. The stranger's
head struck against the porch pillar and bounced back.
"When you talk to my
wife, talk respectable, you hear?"
Old
Mrs. Gumbeiner, cheeks very pink, pushed her husband back in his chair. Then
she leaned forward and examined the stranger's head. She clicked her tongue as
she pulled aside the flap of gray, skin-like material.
"Gumbeiner, look! He's
all springs and wires inside!"
"I told you he was a golem,
but no, you wouldn't
listen," the old man said.
"You said he walked like a golem."
"How could he walk
like a golem unless he was one?"
"All right, all
right.. . . You broke him, so now fix him."
"My
grandfather, his light shines from Paradise, told me that when MoHaRaL—Moreynu
Ha-Rav Low—his memory for a blessing, made the golem in Prague, three hundred? four hundred years ago? he wrote on his
forehead the Holy Name."
Smiling
reminiscently, the old woman continued, "And the golem cut the rabbi's wood and brought his water and guarded the ghetto."
"And one time only he disobeyed the
Rabbi Low, and
Rabbi Low erased the Shem
Ha-Mephorash from
the
golem's forehead and the golem fell down like a dead one.
And they put him up in the attic of the shule and
he's still
there today if the Communisten haven't sent him to Mos-
cow____ This is not just a story," he said.
"Avadda not!" said the old woman.
"I myself have seen both the shule and the rabbi's grave," her husband said, conclusively.
"But
I think this must be a different kind golem, Gumbeiner. See, on his forehead: nothing written."
"What's the matter, there's a law I can't write something there? Where is that
lump clay Bud brought us from his class?"
The
old man washed his hands, adjusted his little black skullcap, and slowly and
carefully wrote four Hebrew letters on the gray forehead.
"Ezra
the Scribe himself couldn't do better," the old woman said, admiringly.
"Nothing happens," she observed, looking at the lifeless figure
sprawled in the chair.
"Well,
after all, am I Rabbi Low?" her husband asked, deprecatingly.
"No," he answered. He leaned over and examined the exposed mechanism.
"This spring goes here . . . this wire comes with this one ..." The figure moved. "But this
one goes where? And this one?"
"Let
be," said his wife. The figure sat up slowly and rolled its eyes loosely.
"Listen,
Reb Golem," the old man said, wagging his finger.
"Pay attention to what I say—you understand?"
"Understand..."
"If
you want to stay here, you got to do like Mr. Gum-beiner says."
"Do-like-Mr.-Gumbeiner-says.. ."
"That's
the way I like to hear a golem talk. Malka, give here the mirror from the pocketbook. Look, you see
your face? You see on the forehead, what's written? If you don't do like Mr.
Gumbeiner says, he'll wipe out what's written and you'll be no more
alive."
"No-more-alive..."
"That's
right. Now, listen. Under
the porch you'll find a lawnmower. Take it And cut the lawn. Then come back.
Go."
"Go . . ." The figure shambled down
the stairs. Presently the sound of the lawnmower whirred through the quiet air
in the street just like the street where Jackie Cooper shed huge tears on
Wallace Beery's shirt and Chester Conk-lin rolled his eyes at Marie Dressier.
"So
what will you write to Tillie?" old Mr. Gumbeiner asked.
"What
should I write?" old Mrs. Gumbeiner shrugged. "I'll write that the
weather is lovely out here and that we are both, Blessed be the Name, in good
health."
The
old man nodded his head slowly, and they sat together on the front porch in
the warm afternoon sun.
THE SOUND
SWEEP
J. G. Ballard
Six Ballard stories have appeared in the SF
Annuals.
"Prima
Belladonna" (2nd Annual) and "The Insane Ones" (the 8th) were
also included in the 1962 collection, Billenium.
"The
Terminal Beach" (in the 10th) was also the title story of two (only partly
matching) collections: one from Berkley in 1964, and one in England (Gollancz),
which also included "The Volcano Dances" and "The Drowned
Giant" (both in the 11th). "Giant" (titled "Souvenir"
in Playboy) also appeared in the first annual Nebula Award Stories (both 1966).
"The
Sound Sweep", originally published in Science Fantasy, February, 1960, was reprinted in The Voices
of Time (Berkley, 1962), and The Four-Dimensional Nightmare (Gollancz, 1963), as well as in the 5th SF Annual.
1
By
midnight Madame
Gioconda's headache had become intense. All day the derelict walls and ceiling
of the sound stage had reverberated with the endless din of traffic accelerating
across the mid-town flyover which arched fifty feet above the studio's roof, a
frenzied hypomaniac babel of jostling horns, shrilling tires, plunging brakes
and engines that hammered down the empty corridors and stairways to the sound
stage on the second floor, making the faded air feel leaden and angry.
Exhausting
but at least impersonal, these sounds Madame Gioconda could bear. At dusk,
however, when the flyover quietened, they were overlaid by the mysterious
clapping of her phantoms, the sourceless applause that rustled down onto the
stage from the darkness around her,
at first a few scattered ripples from the
front rows that soon spread to the entire auditorium, mounting to a tumultuous
ovation in which she suddenly detected a note of sarcasm, a single shout of
derision that drove a spear of pain through her forehead, followed by an uproar
of boos and catcalls that filled the tortured air, driving her away toward her
couch where she lay gasping helplessly until Mangon arrived at midnight,
hurrying onto the stage with his sonovac.
Understanding
her, he first concentrated on sweeping the walls and ceiling clean, draining
away the heavy depressing underlayer of traffic noises. Carefully he ran the
long snout of the sonovac over the ancient scenic flats (relics of her previous
roles at the Metropolitan Opera House) which screened in Madame Gioconda's
makeshift home—the great collapsing Byzantine bed (Othello) mounted against the microphone turret; the
huge framed mirrors with their peeling silverscreen (Orpheus) stacked in one corner by the bandstand; the
stove (Trovatore) set up on the program director's podium; the
gilt-trimmed dressing table and wardrobe (Figaro) stuffed with newspaper and magazine cuttings.
He swept them methodically, moving the sonovac's nozzle in long strokes,
drawing out the dead residues of sound that had accumulated during the day.
By
the time he finished the air was clear again, the atmosphere lightened, its
overtones of fatigue and irritation dissipated. Gradually Madame Gioconda
recovered. Sitting up weakly, she smiled wanly at Mangon. Mangon grinned back
encouragingly, slipped the kettle onto the stove for Russian tea, sweetened by
the usual phenobarbitone chaser, switched off the sonovac and indicated to her
that he was going outside to empty it.
Down in the alley behind the studio he
clipped the sonovac onto the intake manifold of the sound truck. The vacuum
drained in a few seconds, but he waited a discretionary two or three minutes
before returning, keeping up the pretense that Madame Gioconda's phantom
audience was real. Of course the cylinder was always empty, containing only the
usual daily detritus—the sounds of a door slam, a partition collapsing
somewhere or the kettle whistling, a grunt or two, and later, when the
headaches began, Madame Gioconda's pitiful moanings. The riotous applause,
that would have lifted the roof off the Met, let alone a small radio station,
the jeers and hoots of derision were, he knew, quite imaginary, figments of
Madame Gioconda's world of fantasy, phantoms from the past of a once great
prima donna who had been dropped by her public and had retreated in her
imagination, each evening conjuring up a blissful dream of being once again
applauded by a full house at the Metropolitan, a dream that guilt and resentment
turned sour by midnight, inverting it into a nightmare of fiasco and failure.
Why
she should torment herself was difficult to understand, but at least the
nightmare kept Madame Gioconda just this side of sanity and Mangon, who revered
and loved Madame Gioconda, would have been the last person in the world to
disillusion her. Each evening, when he finished his calls for the day, he would
drive his sound truck all the way over from the West Side to the abandoned
radio station under the flyover at the deserted end of F Street, go through
the pretense of sweeping Madame Gioconda's apartment on the stage of studio 2,
charging no fee, make tea and listen to her reminiscences and plans for
revenge, then see her asleep and tiptoe out, a wry but pleased smile on his
youthful face.
He
had been calling on Madame Gioconda for nearly a year, but what his precise
role was in relation to her he had not yet decided. Oddly enough, although he
was more or less indispensable now to the effective operation of her fantasy
world, she showed little personal interest or affection for Mangon; but he
assumed that this indifference was merely part of the autocratic personality of
a world-famous prima donna, particularly one very conscious of the tradition,
now alas meaningless, Melba—Callas—Gioconda. To serve at all was the privilege.
In time, perhaps, Madame Gioconda might accord him some sign of favor.
Without him, certainly, her prognosis would
have been poor. Lately the headaches had become more menacing, as she insisted
that the applause was growing stormier, the boos and catcalls more vicious.
Whatever the psychic mechanism generating the fantasy system, Mangon realized
that ultimately she would need him at the studio all day, holding back the
enveloping tides of nightmare and insanity with dummy passes of the sonovac.
Then, perhaps, when the dream crumbled, he would regret having helped her to
delude herself. With luck though she might achieve her ambition of making a
comeback. She had told him something of her scheme—a serpentine mixture of
blackmail and bribery—and privately Mangon hoped to launch a plot of his own to
return her to popularity. By now she had unfortunately reached the point where
success alone could save her from disaster.
She was sitting up when he returned, propped
back on an enormous gold lamé cushion, the single lamp at the foot of the
couch throwing a semicircle of light onto the great flats which divided the
sound stage from the auditorium. These were all from her last operatic role—The Medium—and represented a complete interior of the
old spiritualist's séance chamber, the one coherent feature in Madame
Gio-conda's present existence. Surrounded by fragments from a dozen roles, even
Madame Gioconda herself, Mangon reflected, seemed compounded of several
separate identities. A tall regal figure, with full shapely shoulders and
massive rib-cage, she had a large handsome face topped by a magnificent
coiffure of rich blue-black hair—the exact prototype of the classical diva.
She must have been almost fifty, yet her soft creamy complexion and small
features were those of a child. The eyes, however, belied her. Large and
watchful, slashed with mascara, they regarded the world around her balefully,
narrowing even as Mangon approached. Her teeth too were bad, stained by
tobacco and cheap cocaine. When she was roused, and her full violet lips curled
with rage revealing the blackened hulks of her dentures and the acid flickering
tongue, her mouth looked like a very vent of hell. Altogether she was a
formidable woman.
As
Mangon brought her tea she heaved herself up and made room for him by her feet
among the debris of beads, loose diary pages, horoscopes and jeweled address
books that littered the couch. Mangon sat down, surreptitiously noting the time
(his first calls were at 9:30 the next morning and loss of sleep deadened his
acute hearing), and prepared himself to listen to her for half an hour.
Suddenly she flinched, shrank back into the
cushion and gestured agitatedly in the direction of the darkened bandstand.
"They're
still clapping!" she shrieked. "For God's sake sweep them away,
they're driving me insane. Oooohh . . ." she rasped theatrically,
"over there, quickly ... !"
Mangón leapt
to his feet. He hurried over to the bandstand and carefully focused his ears
on the tiers of seats and plywood music stands. They were all immaculately
clean, well below the threshold at which embedded sounds began to radiate
detectable echoes. He turned to the corner walls and ceiling. Listening very
carefully he could just hear seven muted pads, the dull echoes of his footsteps
across the floor. They faded and vanished, followed by a low threshing noise
like blurred radio static—in fact Madame Gio-conda's present tantrum. Mangón could almost distinguish the individual
words, but repetition muffled them.
Madame
Gioconda was still writhing about on the couch,
evidently not to be easily placated, so Mangón climbed
down off the stage and made his way through the auditorium to where he had
left his sonovac by the door. The power lead was outside in the truck but he was
sure Madame Gioconda
would fail to notice.
For
five minutes he worked away industriously, pretending to sweep the bandstand
again, then put down the sonovac and returned to the couch.
Madame
Gioconda emerged from the cushion, sounded the air
carefully with two or three slow turns of the head, and smiled at him.
"Thank
you, Mangón/'
she said silkily, her eyes
watching him thoughtfully. "You've saved me again from my assassins.
They've become so cunning recently, they can even hide from you."
Mangón smiled
ruefully to himself at this last remark. So he had been a little too
perfunctory earlier on; Madame Gioconda was
keeping him up to the mark.
However,
she seemed genuinely grateful. "Mangón, my
dear," she reflected as she remade her face in the mirror of an enormous
compact, painting on magnificent green eyes like a cobra's, "what would I do without you? How can I ever repay you for looking after me?"
The questions, whatever their sinister
undertones (had he detected them, Mangon would have been deeply shocked) were
purely rhetorical, and all their conversations for that matter entirely
one-sided. For Mangon was a mute. From the age of three, when his mother had
savagely punched him in the throat to stop him crying, he had been stone dumb,
his vocal cords irreparably damaged. In all their endless exchanges of
midnight confidences, Mangon had contributed not a single spoken word.
His
muteness, naturally, was part of the attraction he felt for Madame Gioconda.
Both of them in a sense had lost their voices, he to a cruel mother, she to a
fickle and unfaithful public. This bound them together, gave them a shared
sense of life's injustice, though Mangon, like all innocents, viewed his
misfortune without rancor. Both, too, were social outcasts. Rescued from his
degenerate parents when he was four, Mangon had been brought up in a succession
of state institutions, a solitary wounded child. His one talent had been his
remarkable auditory powers, and at fourteen he was apprenticed to the
Metropolitan Sonic Disposal Service. Regarded as little better than garbage
collectors, the sound-sweeps were an outcast group of illiterates, mutes (the
city authorities preferred these—their discretion could be relied upon) and
social cripples who lived in a chain of isolated shacks on the edge of an old
explosives plant in the sand dunes to the north of the city which served as
the sonic dump.
Mangon
had made no friends among the sound-sweeps, and Madame Gioconda was the first
person in his life with whom he had been intimately involved. Apart from the
pleasure of being able to help her, a considerable factor in Mangon's devotion
was that until her decline she had represented (as to all mutes) the most
painful possible reminder of his own voiceless condition, and that now he could
at last come to terms with years of unconscious resentment.
This
soon done, he devoted himself wholeheartedly to serving Madame Gioconda.
Inhaling moodily on a black cigarette clamped
into a long jade holder, she was outlining her plans for a comeback. These had
been maturing for several months and involved nothing less than persuading
Hector LeGrande, chairman-in-chief of Video City, the huge corporation that
transmitted a dozen TV and radio channels, into providing her with a complete
series of television spectaculars. Built around Madame Gioconda and lavishly
dressed and orchestrated, they would spearhead the international revival of
classical opera' that was her unfading dream.
"La Scala, Covent Garden, the Met—what
are they now?" she demanded angrily. "Bowling alleys! Can you believe,
Mangon, that in those immortal theaters where I created my Tosca, my Butterfly,
my Briinnhilde, they now have"—she spat out a gust of smoke—"beer and
skittles!"
Mangon
shook his head sympathetically. He pulled a pencil from his breast pocket and
on the wrist-pad stitched to his left sleeve wrote: Mr. LeGrande?
Madame Gioconda read the
note, let it fall to the floor.
"Hector? Those lawyers poison him. He's
surrounded by them, I think they steal all my telegrams to him. Of course
Hector had a complete breakdown on the spectaculars. Imagine, Mangon, what a
scoop for him, a sensation! 'The great Gioconda will appear on television!' Not
just some moronic bubblegum girl, but the Gioconda in person."
Exhausted
by this vision Madame Gioconda sank back into, her cushion, blowing smoke
limply through the holder.
Mangon wrote: Contract?
Madame
Gioconda frowned at the note, then pierced it with the glowing end of her
cigarette.
"I
am having a new contract drawn up. Not for the mere 300,000 I was prepared to
take at first, not even 500,000. For each show I shall now demand precisely one million dollars. Nothing less! Hector will have to
pay for ignoring me. Anyway, think of the publicity value of such a figure.
Only a star could think of such vulgar extravagance. If he's short of cash he
can sack all those lawyers. Or devalue the dollar, I don't mind."
Madame
Gioconda hooted with pleasure at the prospect. Mangon nodded, then scribbled
another message: Be
practical.
Madame Gioconda ground out her cigarette.
"You think I'm raving, don't you, Mangon? 'Fantastic dreams, million-dollar
contracts, poor old fool.' But let me assure you that Hector will be only too
eager to sign the contract. And I don't intend to rely solely on his good
judgment as an impresario." She smirked archly to herself.
What else?
Madame Gioconda peered round the darkened
stage, then lowered her eyes.
"You
see, Mangon, Hector and I are very old friends. You know what I mean, of
course?" She waited for Mangon, who had swept out a thousand honeymoon
hotel suites, to nod and then continued, "How well I remember that first
season at Bayreuth, when Hector and I . . ."
Mangon
stared unhappily at his feet as Madame Gioconda outlined this latest venture
into blackmail. Certainly she and LeGrande had been intimate friends—the
cuttings scattered around the stage testified frankly to this. In fact, were it
not for the small monthly check which LeGrande sent Madame Gioconda she would
long previously have disintegrated. To turn on him and threaten ancient
scandal (LeGrande was shortly to enter politics) was not only grotesque but
extremely dangerous, for LeGrande was ruthless and unsentimental. Years
earlier he had used Madame Gioconda as a stepping stone, reaping all the
publicity he could from their affair, then abruptly kicking her away.
Mangon fretted. A solution to her predicament
was hard to find. Brought about through no fault of her own, Madame Gioconda's
decline was all the harder to bear. Since the introduction a few years earlier
of ultrasonic music, the human voice—indeed, audible music of any type—had gone
completely out of fashion. Ultrasonic music, employing a vastly greater range
of octaves, chords and chromatic scales than perceptible to the human ear,
provided a direct neural link between the sound stream and the auditory lobes,
generating an apparently sourceless sensation of harmony, rhythm, cadence and
melody uncontaminated by the noise and vibration of audible music. The
rescoring of the classical repertoire allowed the ultrasonic audience the best
of both worlds. The majestic rhythms of Beethoven, the popular melodies of
Tchaikovsky, the complex fugal elaborations of Bach, the abstract images of Schoenberg—
all these were raised in frequency above the threshold of conscious audibility.
Not only did they become inaudible, but the original works were rescored for
the much wider range of the ultrasonic orchestra, became richer in texture,
more profound in theme, more sensitive, tender or lyrical as the ultrasonic
arranger chose.
The first casualty in this change-over was
the human voice. This alone of all instruments could not be rescored, because
its sounds were produced by nonmechanical means which the neurophonic engineer
could never hope, or bother, to duplicate.
The earliest ultrasonic recordings had met
with resistance, even ridicule. Radio programs consisting of nothing but
silence interrupted at half-hour intervals by commercial breaks seemed absurd.
But gradually the public discovered that the silence was golden, that after
leaving the radio switched to an ultrasonic channel for an hour or so a pleasant
atmosphere of rhythm and melody seemed to generate itself spontaneously around
them. When an announcer suddenly stated that an ultrasonic version of Mozart's
Jupiter Symphony or Tchaikovsky's Pathétique had just been played the listener identified the real source.
A second advantage of ultrasonic music was
that its frequencies were so high they left no resonating residues in solid
structures, and consequently there was no need to call in the sound-sweep.
After an audible performance of most symphonic music, walls and furniture
throbbed for days with disintegrating residues that made the air seem leaden
and tumid, an entire room virtually uninhabitable.
An
immediate result was the swift collapse of all but a few symphony orchestras
and opera companies. Concert halls and opera houses closed overnight. In the
age of noise the tranquilizing balms of silence began to be rediscovered.
But
the final triumph of ultrasonic music had come with a second development—the
short-playing record, spinning at 900 r.p.m., which condensed the 45 minutes of
a Beethoven symphony to 20 seconds of playing time, the three hours of a
Wagner opera to little more than two minutes. Compact and cheap, SP records
sacrificed nothing to brevity. One 30-second SP record delivered as much neurophonic
pleasure as a natural length recording, but with deeper penetration, greater
total impact.
Ultrasonic
SP records swept all others off the market. Sonic LP records became museum
pieces—only a crank would choose to listen to an audible full-length version of
Siegfried or the Barber of Seville when he could have both wrapped up inaudibly
inside the same five-minute package and appreciate
their full musical value.
The heyday of Madame Gioconda was over.
Unceremoniously left on the shelf, she had managed to survive for a few months
vocalizing on radio commercials. Soon these too went ultrasonic. In a
despairing act of revenge she bought out the radio station which fired her and
made her home on one of the sound stages. Over the years the station became
derelict and forgotten, its windows smashed, neon portico collapsing, aerials
rusting. The huge eight-lane flyover built across it sealed it conclusively
into the past.
Now Madame Gioconda proposed to win her way
back at stiletto-point.
Mangon watched her impassively as she ranted
on nastily in a cloud of purple cigarette smoke, a large seedy witch. The
phenobarbitone was making her drowsy and her threats and ultimatums were
becoming disjointed.
". . . memoirs too, don't forget,
Hector. Frank exposure, no holes barred. I mean . . .' damn, have to get a
ghost. Hotel de Paris at Monte, lots of pictures. Oh, yes, I kept the
photographs." She grubbed about on the couch, came up with a crumpled soap
coupon and a supermarket pay slip. "Wait till those lawyers see them.
Hector—" Suddenly she broke off, stared glassily at Mangon and sagged
back.
Mangon
waited until she was finally asleep, stood up and peered closely at her. She
looked forlorn and desperate. He watched her reverently for a moment, then
tiptoed to the rheostat mounted on the control panel behind the couch, damped
down the lamp at Madame Gioconda's feet and left the stage.
He
sealed the auditorium doors behind him, made his way down to the foyer and
stepped out, sad but at the same time oddly exhilarated, into the cool midnight
air. At last he accepted that he would have to act swiftly if he was to save
Madame Gioconda.
2
Driving
his sound truck into the city shortly after nine the next morning, Mangon
decided to postpone his first call— the weird Neo-Corbusier Episcopalian
Oratory sandwiched among the office blocks in the downtown financial sector—
and instead turned west on Mainway and across the park toward the white-faced
apartment batteries which reared up above the trees and lakes along the north
side.
The
Oratory was a difficult and laborious job that would take him three hours of
concentrated effort. The Dean had recently imported some rare 13th Century
pediments from the Church of St. Francis at Assisi, beautiful sonic matrices rich
with seven centuries of Gregorian chant, overlaid by the timeless tolling of
the Angelus. Mounted into the altar they emanated an atmosphere resonant with
litany and devotion, a mellow, deeply textured hymn that silently evoked the
most sublime images of prayer and meditation.
But
at 50,000 dollars each they also represented a terrifying hazard to the clumsy
sound-sweep. Only two years earlier the entire north transept of Rheims
Cathedral, rose window intact, purchased for a record 1,000,000 dollars and
re-erected in the new Cathedral of St. Joseph at San Diego, had been drained of
its priceless heritage of tonal inlays by a squad of illiterate sound-sweeps
who had misread their instructions and accidentally swept the wrong wall.
Even
the most conscientious sound-sweep was limited by his skill, and Mangon, with
his auditory supersensitivity, was greatly in demand for his ability to sweep
selectively, draining from the walls of the Oratory all extraneous and
discordant noises—coughing, crying, the clatter of coins and mumble of
prayer—leaving behind the chorales and liturgical chants which enhanced their
devotional overtones. His skill alone would lengthen the life of the Assisi
pediments by twenty years; without him they would soon become contaminated by
the miscellaneous traffic of the congregation. Consequently he had no fears
that the Dean would complain if he failed to appear as usual that morning.
Halfway
along the north side of the park he swung off into the forecourt of a huge
forty-story apartment block, a glittering white cliff ribbed by jutting
balconies. Most of the apartments were Superlux duplexes occupied by show business
people. No one was about, but as Mangon entered the hallway, sonovac in one
hand, the marble walls and collimns buzzed softly with the echoing chatter of
guests leaving parties four or five hours earlier.
In
the elevator the residues were clearer—confident male tones, the sharp
wheedling of querulous wives, soft negatives of amatory blondes, punctuated by
countless repetitions of "dahling." Mangon ignored the echoes, which
were almost inaudible, a dim insect hum. He grinned to himself as he rode up to
the penthouse apartment; if Madame Gioconda had known his destination she
would have strangled him on the spot.
Ray Alto, doyen of the ultrasonic composers
and the man more than any other responsible for Madame Gio-conda's decline, was
one of Mangon's regular calls. Usually Mangon swept his apartment once a week,
calling at three in the afternoon. Today, however, he wanted to make sure of
finding Alto before he left for Video City, where he was a director of program
music.
The
houseboy let him in. He crossed the hall and made his way down the black glass
staircase into the sunken lounge. Wide studio windows revealed an elegant
panorama of park and midtown skyscrapers.
A white-slacked young man sitting on one of
the long slab sofas—Paul Merrill, Alto's arranger-—waved him back.
"Mangon,
hold on to your dive breaks. I'm really on reheat this morning." He
twirled the ultrasonic trumpet he was playing, a tangle of stops and valves
from which half a dozen leads trailed off across the cushions to a cathode tube
and tone generator at the other end of the sofa.
Mangon
sat down quietly and Merrill clamped the mouthpiece to his lips. Watching the
ray tube intently, where he could check the shape of the ultrasonic notes, he
launched into a brisk allegretto sequence, then quickened and flicked out a
series of brilliant arpeggios, stripping off high P and Q notes that danced
across the cathode screen like frantic eels, fantastic glissandos that raced up
twenty octaves in as many seconds, each note distinct and symmetrically exact,
tripping off the tone generator in turn so that escalators of electronic chords
interweaved the original scale, a multichannel melodic stream that crowded the
cathode screen with exquisite, flickering patterns. The whole thing was
inaudible, but the air around Mangon felt vibrant and accelerated, charged with
gaiety and sparkle, and he applauded generously when Merrill threw off a final
dashing riff.
"Flight
of the Bumble Bee," Merrill told him. He tossed the trumpet aside
and switched off the cathode tube. He lay back and savored the glistening air
for a moment. "Well, how are things?"
Just
then the door from one of the bedrooms opened and Ray Alto appeared, a tall,
thoughtful man of about forty, with thinning blond hair, wearing pale blue
sunglasses over cool eyes.
"Hello,
Mangon," he said, running a hand over Man-gon's head. "You're early
today. Full program?" Mangon nodded. "Don't let it get you
down." Alto picked a dictaphone off one of the end tables, carried it
over to an armchair. "Noise, noise, noise—the greatest single
disease-vector of civilization. The whole world's rotting with it, yet all they
can afford is a few people like Mangon fooling around with sonovacs. It's hard
to believe that only a few years ago people completely failed to realize that
sound left any residues."
"Are
we any better?" Merrill asked. "This month's Transonics claims that eventually unswept sonic resonances
will build up to a critical point where they'll literally start shaking
buildings apart. The entire city will come down like Jericho."
"Babel,"
Alto corrected. "Okay, now, let's shut up. We'll be gone soon, Mangon. Buy
him a drink would you, Paul."
Merrill
brought Mangon a Coke from the bar, then wandered off. Alto flipped on the
dictaphone, began to speak steadily into it. "Memo 7: Betty, when does the copyright on Stravinsky lapse? Memo 8: Betty, file melody for projected nocturne: L, L sharp, BB, Y flat, Q,
VT, L, L sharp. Memo 9: Paul, the bottom three octaves of the
ultra-tuba are within the audible spectrum of the canine ear— Congrats on the SP of the Anvil Chorus last night; about three million dogs thought
the roof had fallen in on them. Memo 10: Betty—"
He broke off, put down the microphone. "Mangon, you look worried."
Mangon,
who had been lost in reverie, pulled himself together and shook his head.
"Working too hard?" Alto pressed.
He scrutinized Mangon suspiciously. "Are you still sitting up all night
with that Gioconda woman?"
Embarrassed,
Mangon lowered his eyes. His relationship with Alto was, obliquely, almost as
close as that with Madame Gioconda. Although Alto was brusque and often irritable
with Mangon, he took a sincere interest in his welfare. Possibly Mangon's
muteness reminded him of the misanthropic motives behind his hatred of noise,
made him feel indirectly responsible for the act of violence Mangon's mother
had committed. Also, one artist to another, he respected Mangon's phenomenal
auditory sensitivity.
"She'll
exhaust you, Mangon, believe me." Alto knew how much the personal contact
meant to Mangon and hesitated to be overcritical. "There's nothing you
can do for her. Offering her sympathy merely fans her hopes for a comeback. She
hasn't a chance."
Mangon
frowned, wrote quickly on his wrist-pad: She WILL sing again!
Alto
read the note pensively. Then, in a harder voice, he said, "She's using
you for her own purposes, Mangon. At present you satisfy one whim of hers—the
neurotic headaches and fantasy applause. God forbid what the next whim might
be."
She is a great artist.
"She
was," Alto pointed out. "No more, though, sad
as it is. I'm afraid that the times change."
Annoyed
by this, Mangon gritted his teeth and tore off another sheet: Entertainment, perhaps. Art, no!
Alto
accepted the rebuke silently; he reproved himself as much as Mangon did for
selling out to Video City. In his four years there his output of original
ultrasonic music consisted of little more than one nearly finished symphony—
aptly titled Opus
Zero—shortly to receive
its first performance, a few nocturnes and one quartet. Most of his energies
went into program music, prestige numbers for spectaculars and a mass of
straight transcriptions of the classical repertoire. The last he particularly
despised, fit work for Paul Merrill, but not for a responsible composer.
He
added the sheet to the two in his left hand and asked, "Have you ever heard
Madame Gioconda sing?"
Mangon's
answer came back scornfully: No! But you have. Please describe.
Alto laughed shortly, tore up the sheets and
walked across to the window.
"All right, Mangon, you've made your
point. You're carrying a torch for art, doing your duty to one of the few
perfect things the world has ever produced. I hope you're equal to the
responsibility. La Gioconda might be quite a handful. Do you know that at one
time the doors of Covent Garden, La Scala and the Met were closed to her? They said Callas had temperament, but she
was a girl guide compared with Gioconda. Tell me, how is she? Eating
enough?"
Mangon held up his Coke
bottle.
"Snow?
That's tough. But how does she afford it?" He glanced at his watch.
"Dammit, I've got to leave. Clean this place out thoroughly, will you? It
gives me a headache just listening to myself think."
He
started to pick up the dictaphone but Mangon was scribbling rapidly on his pad:
Give Madame Gioconda a job.
Alto
read the note, then gave it back to Mangon, puzzled. "Where? In this
apartment?" Mangon shook his head. "Do you mean at V.C.? Singing?" When Mangon began to nod vigorously he looked
up at the ceiling with a despairing groan. "For heaven's sake, Mangon, the
last vocalist sang at Video City over ten years ago. No audience would stand
for it. If I even suggested such an idea they'd tear my contract into a
thousand pieces." He shuddered, only half-playfully. "I don't know about
you, Mangon, but I've got my ulcer to support."
He
made his way to the staircase, but Mangon intercepted him, pencil flashing
across the wrist-pad: Please.
Madame Gioconda will start blackmail soon. She is desperate. Must sing again.
Could arrange make-believe program in research studios. Closed circuit.
Alto folded the note carefully, left the
dictaphone on the staircase and walked slowly back to the window.
"This
blackmail. Are you absolutely sure? Who, though, do you know?" Mangon
nodded, but looked away. "Okay, I won't press you. LeGrande, probably,
eh?" Mangon turned round in surprise, then gave an elaborate parody of a
shrug.
"Hector
LeGrande. Obvious guess. But there are no secrets there, it's all on open
file. I suppose she's just threatening to make
enough of an exhibition of herself to block his governorship." Alto pursed
his lips. He loathed Le-Grande, not merely for having bribed him into a way of
life he could never renounce, but also because, once having exploited his
weakness, LeGrande never hesitated to remind Alto of it, treating him and his
music with contempt. If Madame Gioconda's blackmail had the slightest hope of
success he would have been only too happy, but he knew LeGrande would destroy
her, probably take Mangon too.
Suddenly
he felt a paradoxical sense of loyalty for Madame Gioconda. He looked at
Mangon, waiting patiently, big spaniel eyes wide with hope.
"The
idea of a closed circuit program is insane. Even if we went to all the trouble
of staging it she wouldn't be satisfied. She doesn't want to sing, she wants to
be a star. It's the trappings of stardom she misses—the
cheering galleries, the piles of bouquets, the greenroom parties. I could
arrange a half-hour session on closed circuit with some trainee technicians—a few
straight selections from Tosca and Butterfly, say, with even a sonic piano accompaniment,
I'd be glad to play it myself—but I can't provide the gossip columns and
theater reviews. What would happen when she found out?" She wants to SING.
Alto
reached out and patted Mangon on the shoulder. "Good for you. All right,
then, I'll think about it. God knows how we'd arrange it. We'd have to tell her
that she'll be making a surprise guest appearance on one of the big
shows—that'll explain the absence of any program announcement and we'll be
able to keep her in an isolated studio. Stress the importance of surprise, to
prevent her from contacting the newspapers . . . Where are you going?"
Mangon
reached the staircase, picked up the dictaphone and returned to Alto with it.
He grinned happily, his jaw working wildly as he struggled to speak. Strangled
sounds quavered in his throat.
Touched,
Alto turned away from him and sat down. "Okay, Mangon," he snapped
brusquely, "you can get on with your job. Remember, I haven't promised
anything." He flicked on the dictaphone, then began: "Memo 11: Ray..."
It
was just after four o'clock when Mangon braked the sound truck in the alley
behind the derelict station. Overhead the traffic hammered along the flyover,
dinning down into the cobbled walls. He had been trying to finish his rounds
early enough to bring Madame Gioconda the big news before her headaches began.
He had swept out the Oratory in an hour, whirled through a couple of movie
theaters, the Museum of Abstract Art, and a dozen private calls in half his
usual time, driven by his almost overwhelming joy at having won a promise of
help from Ray Alto.
He
ran through the foyer, already fumbling at his wrist-pad. For the first time in
many years he really regretted his muteness, his inability to tell Madame
Gioconda orally of his triumph that morning.
Studio
2 was in darkness, the rows of seats and litter of old programs and ice
cream cartons reflected dimly in the single light masked by the tall flats. His
feet slipped in some shattered plaster fallen from the ceiling and he was out
of breath when he clambered up onto the stage and swung round the nearest flat.
Madame Gioconda had gone!
The
stage was deserted, the couch a rumpled mess, a clutter of cold saucepans on
the stove. The wardrobe door was open, dresses wrenched outwards off their
hangers.
For
a moment Mangon panicked, unable to visualize why she should have left,
immediately assuming that she had discovered his plot with Alto.
Then
he realized that never before had he visited the studio until midnight at the
earliest, and that Madame Gioconda had merely gone out to the supermarket. He
smiled at his own stupidity and sat down on the couch to wait for her, sighing
with relief.
Suddenly
the words struck him like the blows of
a pole-ax!
As
vivid as if they had been daubed in letters ten feet deep, they leapt out from
the walls, nearly deafening him with their force.
"You grotesque old witch, you must be
insane! You ever
threaten me again and I'll have you destroyed! LISTEN, you pathetic—"
Mangon spun round helplessly, trying to
screen his ears. The words must have been hurled out in a paroxysm of abuse,
they were only an hour old, vicious sonic scars slashed across the immaculately
swept walls.
His
first thought was to rush out for the sonovac and sweep the walls clear before
Madame Gioconda returned. Then it dawned on him that she had already heard the
original of the echoes—in the background he could just detect the muffled
rhythms and intonations of her voice.
All too exactly, he could
identify the man's voice.
He
had heard it many times before, raging in the same ruthless tirades, when,
deputizing for one of the sound-sweeps, he had swept out the main board room at
Video City.
Hector
LeGrande! So Madame Gioconda had been more desperate than he thought.
The bottom drawer of the dressing table lay
on the floor, its contents upended. Propped against the miiTor was an old silver portrait frame, dull and verdigrised, some cotton wool
and a tin of cleansing fluid next to it. The photograph was one of LeGrande,
taken twenty years earlier. She must have known LeGrande was coming and had
searched out the old portrait, probably regretting the threat of blackmail.
But the sentiment had not
been shared.
Mangon
walked round the stage, his heart knotting with rage, filling his ears with
LeGrande's taunts. He picked up the portrait, pressed it between his palms, and
suddenly smashed it across the edge of the dressing table.
"Mangon!"
The
cry riveted him to the air. He dropped what was left of the frame, saw Madame
Gioconda step quietly from behind one of the flats.
"Mangon,
please," she protested gently. "You frighten me." She sidled
past him toward the bed, dismantling an enormous purple hat. "And do clean
up all that glass, or I shall cut my feet."
She
spoke drowsily and moved in a relaxed, sluggish way that Mangon first assumed
indicated acute shock. Then she drew from her handbag six white vials and lined
them up carefully on the bedside table. These were her favorite confectionery—so LeGrande had sweetened the pill with another check. Mangon began to
scoop the glass together with his feet, at the same time trying to collect his
wits. The sounds of LeGrande's abuse dinned the air, and he broke away and ran
off to fetch the sonovac.
Madame
Gioconda was sitting on the edge of the bed when he returned, dreamily dusting
a small bottle of bourbon which had followed the cocaine vials out of the handbag.
She hummed to herself melodically and stroked one of the feathers in her hat.
"Mangon,"
she called when he had almost finished. "Come here."
Mangon put down the sonovac
and went across to her.
She
looked up at him, her eyes suddenly very steady. "Mangon, why did you
break Hector's picture?" She held up a piece of the frame. 'Tell me."
Mangon hesitated, then scribbled on his pad: I am sorry. 1 adore you very much. He said such foul things
to you.
Madame Gioconda glanced at the note, then
gazed back thoughtfully at Mangon. "Were you hiding here when Hector
came?"
Mangon
shook his head categorically. He started to write on his pad but Madame
Gioconda restrained him.
"That's
all right, dear. I thought not." She looked around the stage for a moment,
listening carefully. "Mangon, when you came in could you hear what Mr.
LeGrande said?"
Mangon nodded. His eyes flickered to the
obscene phrases on the walls and he began to frown. He still felt LeGrande's
presence and his attempt to humiliate Madame Gioconda.
Madame
Gioconda pointed around them. "And you can actually hear what he said even
now? How remarkable. Mangon, you have a wondrous talent."
I am sorry you have to süßer so much.
Madame
Gioconda smiled at this. "We all have our crosses to bear. I have a
feeling you may be able to lighten mine considerably." She patted the bed
beside her. "Do sit down, you must be tired." When he was settled she
went on. "I'm very interested, Mangon. Do you mean you can distinguish
entire phrases and sentences in the sounds you sweep? You can hear complete
conversations hours after they have taken place7"
Something
about Madame Gioconda's curiosity made Mangon hesitate. His talent, so far as
he knew, was unique, and he was not so naive as to fail to appreciate its potentialities.
It had developed in his late adolescence and so far he had resisted any
temptation to abuse it. He had never revealed the talent to anyone, knowing
that if he did his days as a sound-sweep would be over.
Madame
Gioconda was watching him, an expectant smile on her lips. Her thoughts, of
course, were solely of revenge. Mangon listened again to the walls, focused on
the abuse screaming out into the air. Not complete conversations. Long fragments, up to twenty syllables.
Depending on resonances and matrix. Tell no one. I will help you have revenge
on LeGrande.
Madame
Gioconda squeezed Mangon's hand. She was about to reach for the bourbon bottle
when Mangon suddenly remembered the point of his visit. He leapt off the bed
and started frantically scribbling on his wrist-pad.
He
tore off the first sheet and pressed it into her startled hands, then filled
three more, describing his encounter with the musical director at V.C., the
latter's interest in Madame Gioconda and the conditional promise to arrange
her guest appearance. In view of LeGrande's hostility he stressed the need for
absolute secrecy.
He
waited happily while Madame Gioconda read quickly through the notes, tracing
out Mangon's childlike script with a long scarlet fingernail. When she
finished, he nodded his head rapidly and gestured triumphantly in the air.
Bemused,
Madame Gioconda gazed uncomprehendingly at the notes. Then she reached out and
pulled Mangon to her, taking his big faunlike head in her jeweled hands and
pressing it to her lap.
"My
dear child, how much I need you. You must never leave me now."
As she
stroked Mangon's hair her eyes roved questingly around the walls.
The miracle happened shortly before eleven
o'clock the next morning.
After breakfast, sprawled across Madame
Gioconda's bed with her scrapbooks, an old gramophone salvaged by Mangon from
one of the studios playing operatic selections, they had decided to drive out
to the stockades—the sound-sweeps left for the city at nine and they would be
able to examine the sonic dumps unmolested. Having spent so much time with
Madame Gioconda and immersed himself so deeply in her world, Mangon was eager
now to introduce Madame Gioconda to his. The stockades, bleak though they
might be, were all he had to show her.
For
Mangon, Madame Gioconda had now become the entire universe, a source of
certainty and wonder as potent as the sun. Behind him his past life fell away
like the discarded chrysalis of a brilliant butterfly, the gray years of his
childhood at the orphanage dissolving into the magical kaleidoscope that
revolved around him. As she talked and murmured affectionately to him, the drab
flats and props in the studio seemed as brightly colored and meaningful as the
landscape of a mescaline fantasy, the air tingling with a thousand vivid echoes of her voice.
They
set off down F Street at ten, soon left behind the dingy warehouses and
abandoned tenements that had enclosed Madame Gioconda for so long. Squeezed
together in the driving cab of the sound truck they looked an incongruous
pair—the gangling Mangon, in zip-fronted yellow plastic jacket and yellow
peaked cap, at the wheel, dwarfed by the vast flamboyant Madame Gioconda,
wearing a parrot-green cartwheel hat and veil, her huge creamy breast
glittering with pearls, gold stars and jeweled crescents, a small selection of
the orders that had showered upon her in her heyday.
She had breakfasted well, on one of the vials
and a tooth glass of bourbon. As they left the city she gazed out amiably at
the fields stretching away from the highway, and trilled out a light recitative
from Figaro.
Mangon
listened to her happily, glad to see her in such good form. Determined to spend
every possible minute with Madame Gioconda, he had decided to abandon his calls
for the day, if not for the next week and month. With her he at last felt
completely secure. The pressure of her hand and the warm swell of her shoulder
made him feel confident and invigorated, all the more proud that he was able to
help her back to fame.
He
tapped on the windshield as they swung off the highway onto the narrow dirt
track that led toward the stockades. Here and there among the dunes they could
see the low ruined outbuildings of the old explosives plant, the white
galvanized iron roof of one of the sound-sweeps' cabins. Desolate and
unfrequented, the dunes ran on for miles. They passed the remains of a gateway
that had collapsed to one side of the road; originally a continuous fence
ringed the stockade, but no one had any reason for wanting to penetrate it. A
place of strange echoes and festering silences, overhung by a gloomy miasma of
a million compacted sounds, it remained remote and haunted, the graveyard of
countless private babels.
The
first of the sonic dumps appeared two or three hundred yards away on their
right. This was reserved for aircraft sounds swept from the city's streets and
municipal buildings, and was a tightly packed collection of sound-absorbent
baffles covering several acres. The baffles were slightly larger than those in
the other stockades; twenty feet high, and fifteen wide, each supported by
heavy wooden props, they faced each other in a random labyrinth of alleyways,
like a store lot of advertisement hoardings. Only the top two or three feet
were visible above the dunes, but the changed air hit Mangon like a hammer, a
pounding niagara of airliners blaring down the glideway, the piercing whistle
of jets jockeying at take-off, the ceaseless mind-sapping roar that hangs like
a vast umbrella over any metropolitan complex.
All around, odd sounds shaken loose from the
stockades were beginning to reach them. Over the entire area, fed from the
dumps below, hung an unbroken phonic high, invisible but nonetheless as
tangible and menacing as an enormous black thundercloud. Occasionally, when
super-saturation was reached after one of the summer holiday periods, the sonic
pressure fields would split and discharge, venting back into the stockades a
nightmarish cataract of noise, raining onto the sound-sweeps not only the
howling of cats and dogs, but the multilunged tumult of cars, express trains,
fairgrounds and aircraft, the cacophonic mu-sique concrete of civilization.
To Mangon the sounds reaching them, though
scaled higher in the register, were still distinct, but Madame Gio-conda could
hear nothing and felt only an overpowering sense of depression and irritation.
The air seemed to grate and rasp. Mangon noticed her beginning to frown and
hold her hand to her forehead. He wound up his window and indicated to her to
do the same. He switched on the sonovac mounted under the dashboard and let it
drain the discordancies out of the sealed cabin.
Madame
Gioconda relaxed in the sudden blissful silence. A little farther on, when they
passed another stockade set closer to the road, she turned to Mangon and began
to say something to him.
Suddenly
she jerked violently in alarm, her hat toppling. Her voice had frozen! Her
mouth and lips moved frantically, but no sounds emerged. For a moment she was
paralyzed. Clutching her throat desperately, she filled her lungs and
screamed.
A
faint squeak piped out of her cavernous throat, and Mangon swung round in alarm
to see her gibbering apo-plectically, pointing helplessly to her throat.
He
stared at her bewildered, then doubled over the wheel in a convulsion of silent
laughter, slapping his thigh and thumping the dashboard. He pointed to the
sonovac, then reached down and turned up the volume.
".
. . aaauuuoooh," Madame Gioconda heard herself groan. She grasped her hat
and secured it. "Mangon, what a dirty trick, you should have warned
me."
Mangon
grinned. The discordant sounds coming from the stockades began to fill the
cabin again, and he turned down the volume. Gleefully, he scribbled on his
wrist-pad: Now
you know what it is like!
Madame
Gioconda opened her mouth to reply, then stopped in time, hiccupped and took
his arm affectionately.
4
Mangon
slowed down as they approached a side road. Two hundred yards away on their
left a small pink-washed cabin stood on a dune overlooking one of the
stockades. They drove up to it, turned into a circular concrete apron below the
cabin and backed up against one of the unloading bays, a battery of
red-painted hydrants equipped with manifold gauges and release pipes running
off into the stockade. This was only twenty feet away at its nearest point, a
forest of door-shaped baffles facing each other in winding corridors, like a
set from a surrealist film.
As
she climbed down from the truck Madame Gioconda expected the same massive wave
of depression and overload that she had felt from the stockade of aircraft
noises, but instead the air seemed brittle and frenetic, darting with sudden
flashes of tension and exhilaration.
As
they walked up to the cabin Mangon explained: Party noises—company for me.
The twenty or thirty baffles nearest the
cabin he reserved for these screened him from the miscellaneous chatter that
filled the rest of the stockade. When he woke in the mornings he would listen
to the laughter and small talk, enjoy the gossip and wisecracks as much as if
he had been at the parties himself.
The
cabin was a single room with a large window overlooking the stockade, well
insulated from the hubbub below. Madame Gioconda showed only a cursory
interest in Mangon's meager belongings, and after a few general remarks came
to the point and went over to the window. She opened it slightly, listened
experimentally to the stream of atmospheric shifts that crowded past her.
She
pointed to the cabin on the far side of the stockade. "Mangon, whose is
that?"
Gallagher's.
My partner. He sweeps City Hall, University, V.C., big mansions on 5th and A.
Working now.
Madame
Gioconda nodded and surveyed the stockade with interest. "How fascinating.
It's like a zoo. All that talk, talk, talk. And you can hear it all." She snapped back her bracelets with swift
decisive flicks of the wrist.
Mangon
sat down on the bed. The cabin seemed small and dingy, and he was saddened by
Madame Gioconda's disinterest. Having brought her all the way out to the dumps
he wondered how he was going to keep her amused. Fortunately the stockade
intrigued her. When she suggested a stroll through it, he was only too glad to
oblige.
Down at the unloading bay he demonstrated how
he emptied the tanker, clipping the exhaust leads to the hydrant, regulating
the pressure through the manifold and then pumping the sound away into the
stockade.
Most
of the stockade was in a continuous state of uproar, sounding something like a
crowd in a football stadium, and as he led her out among the baffles he picked
their way carefully through the quieter aisles. Around them voices chattered
and whined fretfully, fragments of conversation drifted aimlessly over the air.
Somewhere a woman pleaded in thin nervous tones, a man grumbled to himself,
another swore angrily, a baby bellowed. Behind it all was the steady background
murmur of countless TV programs, the easy patter of announcers, the endless
monotones of race-track commentators, the shrieking audiences of quiz shows,
all pitched an octave up the scale so that they sounded an eerie parody of
themselves.
A
shot rang out in the next aisle, followed by screams and shouting. Although she
heard nothing, the pressure pulse made Madame Gioconda stop.
"Mangon,
wait. Don't be in so much of hurry. Tell me what they're saying."
Mangon
selected a baffle and listened carefully. The sounds appeared to come from an
apartment over a launderette. A battery of washing machines chuntered to themselves,
a cash register slammed interminably, there was a dim almost subthreshold echo
of a 60-cycle hum from an SP record player.
He shook his head, waved
Madame Gioconda on.
"Mangon,
what did they say?"
she pestered him. He
stopped again, sharpened his ears and waited. This time he was more lucky, an
overemotional female voice was gasping, ". . . but if he finds you here
he'll kill you, he'll kill us both, what shall we do .. ." He started to scribble down this outpouring, Madame
Gioconda craning breathlessly over his shoulder, then recognized its source and
screwed up the note.
"Mangon, for heaven's sake, what was it?
Don't throw it away! Tell me!" She tried to climb under the wooden superstructure
of the baffle to recover the note, but Mangon restrained her and quickly
scribbled another message: Adam and Eve. Sorry.
"What, the film? Oh, how ridiculous!
Well, come on, try again."
Eager to make amends, Mangon picked the next
baffle, one of a group serving the staff married quarters of the University.
Always a difficult job to keep clean, he struck paydirt almost at once.
". . . my God, there's Bartók
all over the place, that damned Steiner woman, I'll swear she's sleeping with
her. .."
Mangon took it all down, passing the sheets
to Madame Gioconda as soon as he covered them. Squinting hard at his crabbed
handwriting, she gobbled them eagerly, disappointed when, after half a dozen,
he lost the thread and stopped.
"Go on, Mangon, what's the matter?"
She let the notes fall to the ground. "Difficult, isn't it? We'll have to
teach you shorthand."
They
reached the baffles Mangon had just filled from the previous day's rounds.
Listening carefully he heard Paul Merrill's voice: ". . . month's Transonics claims that . . . the entire city will come
down like Jericho."
He wondered if he could persuade Madame
Gioconda to wait for fifteen minutes, when he would be able to repeat a few
carefully edited fragments from Alto's promise to arrange her guest appearance,
but she seemed eager to move deeper into the stockade.
"You
said your friend Gallagher sweeps out Video City, Mangon. Where would that
be?"
Hector
LeGrande. Of course, Mangon realized, why had he been so obtuse. This was the
chance to pay the man back.
He
pointed to an area a few aisles away. They climbed between the baffles, Mangon
helping Madame Gioconda over the beams and props, steering her full skirt and
wide hat brim away from splinters and rusted metalwork.
The task of finding LeGrande was simple. Even
before the baffles were in sight Mangon could hear the hard unyielding bite of
the tycoon's voice, dominating every other sound from the Video City area.
Gallagher in fact swept only the senior dozen or so executive suites at V.C.,
chiefly to relieve their occupants of the distasteful echoes of Le-Grande's
voice.
Mangon steered their way among these,
searching for
LeGrande's
master suite, where anything of a really confidential nature took place.
There
were about twenty baffles, throwing off an unending chorus of "Yes, H.
L.," "Thanks, H. L.," "Brilliant, H. L." Two or three
seemed strangely quiet, and he drew Madame Gioconda over to them.
This
was LeGrande with his personal secretary and PA. He took out his pencil and
focused carefully.
".
. . of Third National Bank, transfer two million to private holding and
threatened claim for stock depreciation . . . redraft escape clauses,
including nonliability purchase benefits..."
Madame
Gioconda tapped his arm but he gestured her away. Most of the baffle appeared
to be taken up by dubious financial dealings, but nothing that would really
hurt LeGrande if revealed.
Then he heard—
". . . Bermuda Hilton. Private Island,
with anchorage,
have the beach cleaned up, last time the water was full of
fish.... I don't care, poison them,
hang some nets out. ...
Imogene will fly in from Idlewild as Mrs. Edna Burgess,
warn customs to stay away____ "
".
. . call Cartier's, something for the Contessa, 17 carats say, ceiling of ten
thousand. No, make it eight thousand. ..."
"... hat-check girl at Tropicabana. Usual dossier
..."
Mangon
scribbled furiously, but LeGrande was speaking at rapid dictation speed and he
could get down only a few fragments. Madame Gioconda barely deciphered his
handwriting, and became more and more frustrated as her appetite was whetted.
Finally she flung away the notes in a fury of exasperation.
"This
is absurd, you're missing everything!" she cried. She pounded on one of
the baffles, then broke down and began to sob angrily. "Oh, God, God, God, how ridiculous! Help me, I'm going insane...."
Mangon hurried across to her, put his arms
round her shoulders to support her. She pushed him away irritably, railing at
herself to discharge her impatience. "It's useless, Mangon, it's stupid of
me, I was a fool—"
"STOP!"
The cry split the air like the blade of a
guillotine.
They both straightened, stared at each other
blankly. Mangon put his fingers slowly to his lips, then reached out
tremulously and put his hands in Madame Gioconda's. Somewhere within him a
tremendous tension had begun to dissolve.
"Stop,"
he said again in a rough but quiet voice. "Don't cry. I'll help you."
Madame Gioconda gaped at him with amazement.
Then she let out a tremendous whoop of triumph.
"Mangon,
you can talk! You've got your voice back! It's absolutely astounding! Say
something, quickly, for heaven's sake!"
Mangon
felt his mouth again, ran his fingers rapidly over his throat. He began to
tremble with excitement, his face brightened, he jumped up and down like a
child.
"I
can talk," he repeated wonderingly. His voice was gruff, then seesawed
into a treble. "I can talk," he said louder, controlling its pitch.
"I can talk, I can talk, 7 can talk!" He
flung his head back, let out an ear-shattering shout. "I CAN TALK! HEAR
ME!" He ripped the wrist-pad off his sleeve, hurled it away over the
baffles.
Madame
Gioconda backed away, laughing agreeably. "We can hear you, Mangon. Dear
me, how sweet." She watched Mangon thoughtfully as he cavorted happily in
the narrow interval between the aisles. "Now don't tire yourself out or
you'll lose it again."
Mangon
danced over to her, seized her shoulders and squeezed them tightly. He suddenly
realized that he knew no diminutive or Christian name for her.
"Madame
Gioconda," he said earnestly, stumbling over the syllables, the words that
were so simple yet so enormously complex to pronounce. "You gave me back
my voice. Anything you want—" He broke off, stuttering happily, laughing
through his tears. Suddenly he buried his head in her shoulder, exhausted by
his discovery, and cried gratefully, "It's a wonderful voice."
Madame
Gioconda steadied him maternally. "Yes, Mangon," she said, her eyes
on the discarded notes lying in the dust. "You've got a wonderful voice,
all right." Sotto voce, she added, "But your hearing is even more
wonderful."
Paul Merrill switched off the SP player, sat
down on the arm of the sofa and watched Mangon quizzically.
"Strange.
You know, my guess is that it was psychosomatic."
Mangon
grinned. "Psychosemantic," he repeated, garbling the word
half-deliberately. "Clever. You can do amazing things with words. They
help to crystallize the truth."
Merrill
groaned playfully. "God, you sit there, you drink your Coke, you
philosophize. Don't you realize you're supposed to stand quietly in a corner,
positively dumb with gratitude? Now you're even ramming your puns down my
throat. Never mind, tell me again how it happened."
"Once
a pun a time—" Mangon ducked the magazine Merrill flung at him, let out a
loud "Olee!"
For the last two weeks he
had been en fête.
Every
day he and Madame Gioconda followed the same routine; after breakfast at the
studio they drove out to the stockade, spent two or three hours compiling their
confidential file on LeGrande, lunched at the cabin and then drove back to the
city, Mangon going off on his rounds while Madame Gioconda slept until he
returned shortly before midnight. For Mangon their existence was idyllic; not
only was he rediscovering himself in terms of the complex spectra and patterns
of speech—a completely new category of existence—but at the same time his
relationship with Madame Gioconda revealed areas of sympathy, affection and
understanding that he had never previously seen. If he sometimes felt that he
was too preoccupied with his side of their relationship and the extraordinary
benefits it had brought him, at least Madame Gioconda had been equally well
served. Her headaches and mysterious phantoms had gone, she had cleaned up the
studio and begun to salvage a little dignity and self-confidence, which made
her single-minded sense of ambition seem less obsessive. Psychologically, she
needed Mangon less now than he needed her, and he was sensible to restrain his
high spirits and give her plenty of attention. During the first week Mangon's
incessant chatter had been rather wearing, and once, on their way to the
stockade, she had switched on the sonovac in the driving cab and left Mangon
mouthing silently at the air like a stranded fish. He had taken the hint
"What about the sound-sweeping?"
Merrill asked. "Will you give it up?"
Mangon shrugged. "It's my talent, but
living at the stockade, let in at back doors, cleaning up the verbal garbage—
it's a degraded job. I want to help Madame Gioconda. She will need a secretary
when she starts to go on tour."
Merrill
shook his head warily. "You're awfully sure there's going to be a sonic
revival, Mangon. Every sign is against it."
"They
have not heard Madame Gioconda sing. Believe me, I know the power and wonder of
the human voice. Ultrasonic music is great for atmosphere, but it has no content.
It can't express ideas, only emotions."
"What
happened to that closed circuit program you and Ray were going to put on for
her?"
"It—fell
through," Mangon lied. The circuits Madame Gioconda would perform on would
be open to the world. He had told them nothing of the visits to the stockade,
of his power to read the baffles, of the accumulating file on LeGrande. Soon
Madame Gioconda would strike.
Above
them in the hallway a door slammed, someone stormed through into the apartment
in a tempest, kicking a chair against a wall. It was Alto. He raced down the
staircase into the lounge, jaw tense, fingers flexing angrily.
"Paul,
don't interrupt me until I've finished," he snapped, racing past without
looking at them. "You'll be out of a job, but I warn you, if you don't
back me up one hundred per cent I'll shoot you. That goes for you too, Mangon,
I need you in on this." He whirled over to the window, bolted out the
traffic noises below, then swung back and watched them steadily, feet planted
firmly in the carpet. For the first time in the three years Mangon had known
him he looked aggressive and confident.
"Headline,"
he announced. "The Gioconda is to sing again! Incredible and terrifying
though the prospect may seem, exactly two weeks from now the live uncensored
voice of the Gioconda will go out coast-to-coast on all three V.C. radio
channels. Surprised, Mangon? It's no secret, they're printing the bills right
now. Eight-thirty to nine-thirty, right up on the peak, even if they have to
give the time away."
Merrill sat forward. "Bully for her. If
LeGrande wants to drive the whole ship into the ground, why worry?"
Alto
punched the sofa viciously. "Because you and I are going to be on board!
Didn't you hear me? Eight-thirty, a fortnight today! We have a program on then. Well, guess who our guest star is?"
Merrill
struggled to make sense of this. "Wait a minute, Ray. You mean she's
actually going to appear—she's going to sing—in
the middle of Opus
Zero?" Alto
nodded grimly. Merrill threw up his hands and slumped back. "It's crazy,
she can't. Who says she will?"
"Who
do you think? The great LeGrande." Alto turned to Mangon. "She must
have raked up some real dirt to frighten him into this. I can hardly believe
it."
"But
why on Opus Zero?" Merrill pressed. "Let's switch the première to the week after."
"Paul,
you're missing the point. Let me fill you in. Sometime yesterday Madame
Gioconda paid a private call on LeGrande. Something she told him persuaded him
that it would be absolutely wonderful for her to have a whole hour- to herself
on one of the feature music programs, singing a few old-fashioned songs from
the old-fashioned shows, with a full-scale ultrasonic backing. Eager to give
her a completely free hand he even asked her which of the regular programs
she'd like. Well, as the last show she appeared on ten years ago was canceled
to make way for Ray Alto's Total Symphony you
can guess which one she picked."
Merrill
nodded. "It all fits together. We're broadcasting from the concert studio.
A single ultrasonic symphony, no station breaks, not even a commentary. Your
first world première
in three years. There'll be
a big invited audience. White tie, something like the old days. Revenge is
sweet." He shook his head sadly. "Hell, all that work."
Alto snapped, "Don't worry, it won't be
wasted. Why should we pay the bill for LeGrande? This symphony is the one piece
of serious music I've written since I joined V.C. and it isn't going to be
ruined." He went over to Mangon, sat down next to him. "This
afternoon I went down to the rehearsal studios. They'd found an ancient sonic
grand somewhere and one of the old-timers was accompanying her. Mangon, it's
ten years since she sang last. If she'd practiced for two or three hours a day
she might have preserved her voice, but you sweep her radio station, you know
she hasn't sung a note. She's an old woman now. What time alone hasn't done to
her, cocaine and self-pity have." He paused, watching Mangon searchingly.
"I hate to say it, Mangon, but it sounded like a cat being
strangled."
You
lie, Mangon thought icily.
You are simply so ignorant,
your taste in music is so debased, that you are unable to recognise real
genius when you see it. He looked at Alto with contempt, sorry for the man, with his absurd
silent symphonies. He felt like shouting: / know what silence is! The voice of the Gioconda is a stream of gold, molten and pure, she will find it
again as I found mine. However,
something about Alto's manner warned him to wait.
He
said, "I understand." Then, "What do you want me to do?"
Alto
patted him on the shoulder. "Good boy. Believe me, you'll be helping her
in the long run. What I propose will save all of us from looking foolish. We've
got to stand up to LeGrande, even if it means a one-way ticket out of V.C.
Okay, Paul?" Merrill nodded firmly and he went on, "Orchestra will
continue as scheduled. According to the program Madame Gioconda will be
singing to an accompaniment by Opus Zero, but
that means nothing and there'll be no connection at any point. In fact she
won't turn up until the night itself. She'll stand well down-stage on a special
platform, and the only microphone will be an aerial about twenty feet
diagonally above her. It will be live—but her voice will never reach it. Because you, Mangon, will be in the cue-box
directly in front of her, with the most powerful sonovac we can lay our hands
on. As soon as she opens her mouth you'll let her have it. She'll be at least
ten feet away from you so she'll hear herself and won't suspect what is
happening."
"What about the audience?" Merrill
asked.
"They'll
be listening to my symphony, enjoying a neuro-phonic experience of sufficient
beauty and power, I hope, to distract them from the sight of a blowzy prima
donna gesturing to herself in a cocaine fog. They'll probably think she's
conducting. Remember, they may be expecting her to sing but how many people
still know what the word really
means? Most of them will assume its
ultrasonic." "And LeGrande?"
"He'll be in Bermuda. Business
conference." 5
Madame
Gioconda was sitting before her dressing table mirror, painting on a face like
a Halloween mask. Beside her the gramophone played scratchy sonic selections
from Traviata. The stage was still a disorganized jumble,
but there was now an air of purpose about it.
Making
his way through the flats, Mangon walked up to her quietly and kissed her bare
shoulder. She stood up with a flourish, an enormous monument of a woman in a
magnificent black silk dress sparkling with thousands of sequins.
"Thank
you, Mangon," she sang out when he complimented her. She swirled off to a
hat-box on the bed, pulled out a huge peacock feather and stabbed it into her
hair.
Mangon
had come round at six, several hours before usual; over the past two days he
had felt increasingly uneasy. He was convinced that Alto was in error, and yet
logic was firmly on his side. Could Madame Gioconda's voice have preserved
itself? Her spoken voice, unless she was being particularly sweet, was harsh
and uneven, recently even more so. He assumed that with only a week to her
performance nervousness was making her irritable.
Again
she was going out, as she had done almost every night. With whom, she never
explained; probably to the theater restaurants, to renew contacts with agents
and managers. He would like to have gone with her, but he felt out of place on
this plane of Madame Gioconda's existence.
"Mangon,
I won't be back until very late," she warned him. "You look rather
tired and pasty. You'd better go home and get some sleep."
Mangon noticed he was still wearing his
yellow peaked cap. Unconsciously he must already have known he would not be
spending the night there.
"Do
you want to go to the stockade tomorrow?" he asked.
"Hmmmh
... I don't think so. It gives me
rather a headache. Let's leave
it for a day
or two."
She turned on him with a tremendous smile,
her eyes glittering with sudden affection.
"Good-by,
Mangon, it's been wonderful to see you." She bent down and pressed her
cheek maternally to his, engulfing him in a heady wave of powder and perfume.
In an instant all his doubts and worries evaporated, he looked forward to
seeing her the next day, certain that they would spend the future together.
For
half an hour after she had gone he wandered around the deserted sound stage,
going through his memories. Then he made his way out to the alley and drove
back to the stockade.
As the day of Madame Gioconda's performance
drew closer Mangon's anxieties mounted. Twice he had been down to the concert
studio at Video City, had rehearsed with Alto his entry beneath the stage to
the cue-box, a small compartment off the corridor used by the electronics
engineers. They had checked the power points, borrowed a sonovac from the
services section—a heavy duty model used for shielding VIP's and commentators
at airports— and mounted its nozzle in the cue-hood.
Alto
stood on the platform erected for Madame Gio-conda, shouted at the top of his
voice at Merrill sitting in the third row of the stalls.
"Hear anything?"
he called afterward.
Merrill shook his head.
"Nothing, no vibration at all."
Down
below Mangon flicked the release toggle, vented a long drawn-out
"Fiivweeee! . .. Foouuurrr! ... Thrreeeee! ... Twooooo! . ..
Onnneeee... !"
"Good
enough," Alto decided. Chicago-style, they hid the sonovac in a
triple-bass case, stored it in Alto's office.
"Do
you want to hear her sing, Mangon?" Alto asked. "She should be
rehearsing now."
Mangon hesitated, then
declined.
"It's
tragic that she's unable to realize the truth herself," Alto commented.
"Her mind must be fixed fifteen or twenty years in the past, when she sang
her greatest roles at La Scala. That's the voice she hears, the voice she'll
probably always hear."
Mangon
pondered this. Once he tried to ask Madame Gioconda how her practice sessions
were going, but she was moving into a different zone and answered with some
grandiose remark. He was seeing less and less of her, whenever he visited the
station she was either about to go out or else tired and eager to be rid of
him. Their trips to the stockade had ceased. All this he accepted as
inevitable; after the performance, he assured himself, after her triumph, she
would come back to him.
He noticed, however, that he
was beginning to stutter.
On the final afternoon, a few hours before
the performance that evening, Mangon drove down to F Street for what was to be
the last time. He had not seen Madame Gio-conda the previous day and he wanted
to be with her and give her any encouragement she needed.
As
he turned into the alley he was surprised to see two large removal vans parked
outside the station entrance. Four or five men were carrying out pieces of
furniture and the great scenic flats from the sound stage.
Mangon
ran over to them. One of the vans was full; he recognized all Madame Gioconda's
possessions—the rococo wardrobe and dressing table, the couch, the huge
Desde-mona bed, up-ended and wrapped in corrugated paper—as he looked at it he
felt that a section of himself had been torn from him and rammed away
callously. In the bright daylight the peeling threadbare flats had lost all
illusion of reality; with them Mangon's whole relationship with Madame
Gioconda seemed to have been dismantled.
The
last of the workmen came out with a gold cushion under his arm, tossed it into
the second van. The foreman sealed the doors and waved on the driver.
"W
. . . wh . . . where are you going?" Mangon asked him urgently.
The
foreman looked him up and down. "You're the sweeper, are you?" He
jerked a thumb toward the station. "The old girl said there was a message
for you in there. Couldn't see one myself."
Mangon
left him and ran into the foyer and up the stairway toward Studio 2. The
removers had torn down the blinds and a gray light was flooding into the dusty
auditorium. Without the flats the stage looked exposed and derelict.
He raced down the aisle, wondering why Madame
Gioconda had decided to leave without telling him.
The
stage had been stripped. The music stands had been kicked over, the stove lay
on its side with two or three old pans around it, underfoot there was a
miscellaneous Utter of paper, ash and empty vials.
Mangon
searched around for the message, probably pinned to one of the partitions.
Then
he heard it screaming at him from the walls, violent and concise.
"GO
AWAY YOU UGLY CHILD! NEVER TRY TO SEE ME AGAIN!"
He
shrank back, involuntarily tried to shout as the walls seemed to fall in on
him, but his throat had frozen.
As he entered the corridor below the stage
shortly before eight-twenty, Mangon could hear the sounds of the audience
arriving and making their way to their seats. The studio was almost full, a
hubbub of well-heeled chatter. Lights flashed on and off in the corridor, and
oblique atmospheric shifts cut through the air as the players on the stage
tuned their instruments.
Mangon
slid past the technicians manning the neuro-phonic rigs which supplied the
orchestra, trying to make the enormous triple-bass case as inconspicuous as
possible. They were all busy checking the relays and circuits, and he reached
the cue-box and slipped through the door unnoticed.
The box was almost in darkness, a few rays of
colored light filtering through the pink and white petals of the chrysanthemums
stacked over the hood. He bolted the door, then opened the case, lifted out the
sonovac and clipped the snout into the cannister. Leaning forward, with his
hands he pushed a small aperture among the flowers.
Directly
in front of him he could see a velvet-lined platform, equipped with a
white metal rail to the center of which a large floral ribbon had been tied.
Beyond was the orchestra, disposed in a semicircle, each of the twenty members
sitting at a small boxlike desk on which rested his instrument, tone generator
and cathode tube. They were all present, and the light reflected from the ray
screens threw a vivid phosphorescent glow onto the silver wall behind them.
Mangon propped the nozzle of the sonovac into
the aperture, bent down, plugged in the lead and switched on.
Just
before eight twenty-five someone stepped across the platform and paused in
front of the cue-hood. Mangon crouched back, watching the patent leather shoes
and black trousers move near the nozzle.
"Mangon!"
he heard Alto snap. He craned forward, saw Alto eyeing him. Mangon waved to him
and Alto nodded slowly, at the same time smiling to someone in the audience, then turned on his heel
and took his place in the orchestra.
At
eight-thirty a sequence of red and green lights signaled the start of the
program. The audience quietened, waiting while an announcer in an offstage
booth introduced the program.
A
compere appeared on stage, standing behind the cue-hood, and addressed the
audience. Mangon sat quietly on the small wooden seat fastened to the wall,
staring blankly at the cannister of the sonovac. There was a round of applause,
and a steady green light shone downward through the flowers. The air in the
cue-box began to sweeten, a cool motionless breeze eddied vertically around him
as a rhythmic ultrasonic pressure wave pulsed past. It relaxed the confined
dimensions of the box, and had a strange mesmeric tug that held his attention.
Somewhere in his mind he realized that the symphony had started, but he was too
distracted to pull himself together and listen to it consciously.
Suddenly,
through the gap between the flowers and the sonovac nozzle, he saw a large
white mass shifting about on the platform. He slipped off the seat and peered
up.
Madame
Gioconda had taken her place on the platform. Seen from below she seemed
enormous, a towering cataract of glistening white satin that swept down to her
feet. Her arms were folded loosely in front of her, fingers flashing with blue
and white stones. He could only just glimpse her face, the terrifying witchlike
mask turned in profile as she waited for some offstage signal.
Mangon
mobilized himself, slid his hand down to the trigger of the sonovac. He waited,
feeling the steady subliminal music of Alto's symphony swell massively within
him, its tempo accelerating. Presumably Madame Giocon-da's arranger was waiting
for a climax at which to introduce her first aria.
Abruptly Madame Gioconda looked forward at
the audience and took a short step to the rail. Her hands parted and opened
palms upward, her head moved back, her bare shoulders swelled.
• The wave front pulsing through the cue-box
stopped, then soared off into a continuous unbroken crescendo. At the same time
Madame Gioconda thrust her head out, her throat muscles contracted powerfully.
As
the sound burst from her throat Mangon's finger locked rigidly against the
trigger guard. An instant later, before he could think, a shattering blast of
sound ripped through his ears, followed by a slightly higher note that appeared
to strike a hidden ridge halfway along its path, wavered slightly, then
recovered and sped on, like an express train crossing lines.
Mangon
listened to her numbly, hands gripping the barrel of the sonovac. The voice
exploded in his brain, flooding every nexus of cells with its violence. It was
grotesque, an insane parody of a classical soprano. Harmony, purity, cadence
had gone. Rough and cracked, it jerked sharply from one high note to a lower,
its breath intervals uncontrolled, sudden precipices of gasping silence which
plunged through the volcanic torrent, dividing it into a loosely connected
sequence of bravura passages.
He barely recognized what she was singing:
the Toreador song from Carmen.
Why she had picked this he
could not imagine. Unable to reach its higher notes she fell back on the
swinging rhythm of the refrain, hammering out the rolling phrases with tosses
of her head. After a dozen bars her pace slackened, she slipped into an extempore
humming, then broke out of this into a final climactic assault.
Appalled,
Mangon watched as two or three members of the orchestra stood up and
disappeared into the wings. The others had stopped playing, were switching off
their instruments and conferring with each other. The audience was obviously
restive; Mangon could hear individual voices in the intervals when Madame
Gioconda refilled her lungs.
Behind
him someone hammered on the door. Startled, Mangon nearly tripped across the
sonovac. Then he bent down and wrenched the plug out of its socket. Snapping
open the two catches beneath the chassis of the sonovac, he pulled off the
cannister to reveal the valves, amplifier and generator. He slipped his fingers
carefully through the leads and coils, seized them as firmly as he could and
ripped them out with a single motion. Tearing his nails, he stripped the
printed circuit off the bottom of the chassis and crushed it between his hands.
Satisfied,
he dropped the sonovac to the floor, listened for a moment to the caterwauling
above, which was now being drowned by the mounting vocal opposition of the
audience, then unlatched the door.
Paul
Merrill, his bow tie askew, burst in. He gaped blankly at Mangon, at the blood
dripping from his fingers and the smashed sonovac on the floor.
He seized Mangon by the shoulders, shook him
roughly.
"Mangon, are you
crazy? What are you trying to do?"
Mangon
attempted to say something, but his voice had died. He pulled himself away from
Merrill, pushed past into the corridor.
Merrill
shouted after him. "Mangon, help me fix this! Where are you going?"
He got down on his knees, started trying to piece the sonovac together.
From
the wings Mangon briefly watched the scene on the stage. ■
Madame
Gioconda was still singing, her voice completely inaudible in the uproar from
the auditorium. Half the audience were on their feet, shouting toward the
stage and apparently remonstrating with the studio officials. All but a few
members of the orchestra had left their instruments, these sitting on their
desks and watching Madame Gioconda in amazement.
The
program director, Alto and one of the comperes stood in front of her, banging
on the rail and trying to attract her attention. But Madame Gioconda failed to
notice them. Head back, eyes on the brilliant ceiling lights, hands gesturing
majestically, she soared along the private causeways of sound that poured
unrelentingly from her throat, a great white angel of discord on her homeward
flight.
Mangon
watched her sadly, then slipped away through the stage hands pressing around
him. As he left the theater by the stage door a small crowd was gathering by
the main entrance. He flicked away the blood from his fingers, then bound his
handkerchief round them.
He walked down the side street to where the
sound truck
was
parked, climbed into the cab and sat still for a few minutes, looking out at
the bright evening lights in the bars and shop-fronts.
Opening
the dashboard locker, he hunted through it and pulled out an old wrist-pad,
clipped it into his sleeve.
In
his ears the sound of Madame Gioconda singing echoed like an insane banshee.
He
switched on the sonovac under the dashboard, turned it full on, then started
the engine and drove off into the night.
HICKORY, DICKORY,
KEROUAC
Richard Gehman
Richard Gehman owns nine typewriters ond an unknown number
of pen-names. Since leaving the Army for the freelance life in 1946, he has
written some of everything for virtually everybody. (Reputedly, he once wrote six
pieces for a single issue of Cosmopolitan, under six different names, in three
days.) Born in Lancaster, Pa., he now lives wtih his wife and four children in
Kent Cliffs, N.Y. His recent books include fiogart (Gold Medal, 1965), Haphazard Gourmet (Scribner, 1966), ond Playboy's Playboy (Trident, 1966).
So
far as I know, "Hickory, Dickory, Kerouac" was his only venture into
fantasy—but I wouldn't have known about this one, either, since it appeared
originally (in the March, 1958 Playboy) under
the pseudonym of "Martin Scott." It is reprinted here from the 4th SF
Annual.
It was a
season of great restlessness and change for mice
everywhere, a stirring time, a time of moods and urges and moves. The mouse
felt it; his whiskers trembled in anticipation. One night there was a party in
a stall, and an old badger came. He sat there drinking red wine and aspirin
gravely, staring at a young and excitable squirrel who had been on cashews for
months.
"It's
the time, man!" the squirrel kept saying to the badger,
but the mouse knew the message was for him. It had to be for him; the badger
had fallen asleep after his third Sneaky Pete. That was the badger's way of
rebellion. No squirrel could bug him.
The
mouse got the message. He was quite possibly the hippest mouse that ever crept.
He dug. He dug everything —he dug with his sharp little eyes, he dug with his
pointy little nose, he dug with his little claws (under each of which
he kept a bit of dirt at all times, in case
he might be invited to the Actors' Studio). The mouse dug the gray mice that
lived in the universe that was his house, he dug the brown mice that were
padded down in the vast unreachable reaches of the fields, and he dug the
mice-colored mice that lived nowhere but stayed ever on the road. He even dug
rats. Oh, how he dug; he dug the whole world, and he dug his hole-world. He was
with it, he was of it, he was in. This mouse was a cat.
He
was well-known, too. He had eaten some pages of verse in some tiny magazines—Trap, Silo Review and Barley—and
they had heard of him in San Francisco, where there was a small but pulsating
and mysterious mouse revival swinging. But the season of restlessness caught
him and he was hung, and although he had finished chewing three pages of a novel,
he said to his mother, "Dad, I got to go."
There
was reason enough: nothing charged him. He'd been on pot. Nothing. He'd gone on pot again;
still nothing. He'd then gone on pan, kettle, roaster, colander, soup spoon; he'd tried everything in the kitchen cabinet.
No kicks.
The
word was out—he'd seen it in the squirrel's eyes that night at the party. The
hipsters had a new kick. Go on clock, the
word came. Man,
get with the clock-way; man, it's time; make it, man, it's timeless.
The
mouse rushed first to the First National Corn Crib, where all the squares kept
their hoards. He started to spit— but he dug it too much, there was too much
love in him for squares and everybody else, they were all Zenned up like he
was, and he could not do it. He changed his mind, then changed it again. He
rushed on. Man, this was living! He rushed over to a haystack where a beetle
had a pad and gnawed anarchist poetry. He seized six of the beetle's legs and
shook them violently. The beetle opened three of his four eyes and regarded the
mouse with utter serenity. He was stoned, but he had so many eyes he could be
stoned and still see everything.
"Come on," the mouse cried.
The
beetle said nothing. That was what was so great about him, the mouse knew; he
dug and he never spoke, like the crazy old mixed-up Zenners.
HICKORY, DICKORY, KEROUAC 397
It was time to go again; time to go on time.
The mouse ran and ran and ran and ran and finally he was there, at the clock.
There it stood, wild as a skyscraper, tall and proud and like all America with
a moon-face above it, waving its hands inscrutably and passively, cool as you
please. The mouse wished he had a chick to dig it with him but knew that was
childish; he was himself,
he was with, in, of and it. The realization made his tail twitch. His ears rattled. Then the music
came, long and mysterious, like some great old song chanted all the way from
Tibet:
Hickory, dickory ...
It
was the moment of truth: reds and greens and blues crowded in and permeated his
little red eyes, he broke out in a cold sweat, he broke in out of a hot sweat.
Dock!
That was it. He ran up, he ran down. Nothing
happened.
Hickory, dickory, dock! the unearthly music came again.
"I dig!" the
mouse screamed, and ran up and down again.
"I'm
on the clock, Dad!" he cried to no one in particular.
Breathless, he shouted it again. A spider, observing him icily from a corner,
shrugged and wondered what the younger generation was coming to.
The
mouse glanced at the spider. That second was when he knew the truth. Pot was no
good, pan was no good, clock was just as bad. There was no escaping it. In the
final analysis, he had to look inward. He walked home slowly and chewed up the
rest of his novel. Today he is rich, a trustee of the First National Corn Crib,
and is thinking of eating another book as soon as he can find the time away
from his job. The badger is dead, the beetle has turned chiropractor, and only
God digs. Hickory,
dickory, dock.
DREAMING IS
A PRIVATE
THING
Isaac Asimov
Isaac
Asimov is the author (or editor, or collaborative author) of more than 80
books: science fiction, mystery, popular science, scientific textbooks,
juveniles, and philosophic essays. His short stories and articles have appeared
in publications ranging from Esquire to Astonishing Stories to TV Guide to the Bulletin of Atomic Scientists; although writing and lecturing engagements
now prevent his maintaining a teaching schedule, he is an Associate Professor
of Biochemistry at the Boston University School of Medicine.
Born
in Russia in 1920, Asimov was not yet three years old when his family moved to
Brooklyn, N.Y. He sold his first story at the age of eighteen; three years
later, when he took his M.A. in Chemistry at Columbia, he had sold almost two
dozen more, including the first of the positronic robot stories (postulating
the now classic "three laws of robotics") recently reprinted in I,
Robot (1962) and The Rest of the Robots (1965). The stories composing The Foundation Trilogy (1964) were largely written while he was
working for his Ph.D., after wartime service at the Naval Air Experimental
Station in Philadelphia.
Asimov's nonfiction career began with a
curious article in 1948 entitled "The Endochronic Properties of
Resublimated Thiotimoline", which was responsible for his being the first
science candidate for a Ph.D. to be asked a science-fiction question during his
oral examination. In 1950, when his first S-F book (Pebble in the Sky) was published, he began writing his first textbook. By 1958, nonfiction
writing was occupying him almost exclusively: among (many) other things, he
began the monthly science articles still running in Fantasy & Science Fiction, and published (in 1960) the first edition of
the recently revised, monumental. New Intelligent Man's Guide to Science (Basic Books, 1965). He is now (among other things) working on a
volume called It's
Mentioned in the Bible, and
a book on Greek history.
He
is also, happily, returning at last to writing some fiction (notably,
"Eyes Do More Than See" in the 11th Annual).
"Dreaming
is a Private Thing" first appeared in the December, 1955, Fantasy & Science Fiction; it is reprinted here, from
the 1st SF Annual,
with the author's permission. His stories,
"Each an Explorer" and "Let's Gel Together" also appeared
in the 2nd and 3rd Annuals, and an article, "The Thunder-Thieves", in
the 4th.
Jesse weill looked up from his desk. His old spare body,
his sharp high-bridge nose, deep-set shadowy eyes and amazing shock of white
hair had trademarked his appearance during the years that Dreams, Inc. had
become world-famous.
He said, "Is the boy
here already, Joe?"
Joe
Dooley was short and heavyset. A cigar caressed his moist lower lip. He took it
away for a moment and nodded. "His folks are with him. They're all
scared."
"You're
sure this is not a false alarm, Joe? I haven't got much time." He looked
at his watch. "Government business at two."
"This
is a sure thing, Mr. Weill." Dooley's face was a study in earnestness. His
jowls quivered with persuasive intensity. "Like I told you, I picked him
up playing some kind of basketball game in the schoolyard. You should've seen
the kid. He stunk. When he had his hands on the ball, his own team had to take
it away, and fast, but just the same he had all the stance of a star player.
Know what I mean? To me it was a giveaway."
"Did you talk to
him?"
"Well,
sure. I stopped him at lunch. You know me." Dooley gestured expansively
with his cigar and caught the severed ash with his other hand. " 'Kid,' I said—"
"And he's dream
material?"
"I said, 'Kid, I just
came from Africa and—'"
"All
right." Weill held up the palm of his hand. "Your word I'll always
take. How you do it I don't know, but when you say a boy is a potential
dreamer, I'll gamble. Bring him in."
The
youngster came in between his parents. Dooley pushed chairs forward and Weill
rose to shake hands. He smiled at the youngster in a way that turned the
wrinkles of his face into benevolent creases.
"You're Tommy
Slutsky?"
Tommy nodded wordlessly. He was about ten and
a little small for that. His dark hair was
plastered down un-convincingly and his face was unrealistically clean. Weill
said, "You're a good boy?"
The
boy's mother smiled at once and patted Tommy's head maternally (a gesture which did not soften the anxious
expression on the youngster's face). She said, "He's always a very good
boy."
Weill
let this dubious statement pass. "Tell me, Tommy," he said, and held
out a lollipop which was first hesitantly considered, then accepted. "Do
you ever listen to dream-ies?"
"Sometimes," said Tommy, in an
uncertain treble.
Mr.
Slutsky cleared his throat. He was broad-shouldered and thick-fingered, the
type of laboring man who, every once in a while, to the confusion of eugenics,
sired a dreamer. "We rented one or two for the boy. Real old ones."
Weill
nodded. He said, "Did you like them, Tommy?" "They were sort of
silly."
"You think up better ones for yourself,
do you?"
The
grin that spread over the ten-year-old features had the effect of taking away
some of the unreality of the slicked hair and washed face.
Weill
went on, gently, "Would you like to make up a dream for me?"
Tommy was instantly embarrassed. "I
guess not."
"It won't be hard. It's very easy.
—Joe."
Dooley
moved a screen out of the way and rolled forward a dream-recorder.
The youngster looked owlishly at it.
Weill
lifted the helmet and brought it close to the boy. "Do you know what this
is?"
Tommy shrank away. "No."
"It's
a thinker. That's what we call it because people think into it. You put it on
your head and think anything you want."
"Then what happens?"
"Nothing at all. It feels nice."
"No," said Tommy, "I guess I'd
rather not."
His
mother bent hurriedly toward him. "It won't hurt, Tommy. You do what the
man says." There was an unmistakable edge to her voice.
Tommy stiffened and looked as though he might
cry, but he didn't. Weill put the thinker on him.
He
did it gently and slowly and let it remain there for some 30 seconds before
speaking again, to let the boy assure himself it would do no harm, to let him
get used to the insinuating touch of the fibrils against the sutures of his
skull (penetrating the skin so finely as to be almost insensible), and finally
to let him get used to the faint hum of the alternating field vortices.
Then he said, "Now
would you think for us?"
"About what?"
Only the boy's nose and mouth showed.
"About
anything you want. What's the best thing you would like to do when school is
out?"
The
boy thought a moment and said, with rising inflection, "Go on a
stratojet?"
"Why
not? Sure thing. You go on a jet. It's taking off right now." He gestured
lightly to Dooley, who threw the freezer into circuit.
Weill
kept the boy only five minutes and then let him and his mother be escorted from
the office by Dooley. Tommy looked bewildered but undamaged by the ordeal.
Weill
said to the father, "Now, Mr. Slutsky, if your boy does well on this test,
we'll be glad to pay you five hundred dollars each year until he finishes high
school. In that time, all we'll ask is that he spend an hour a week some
afternoon at our special school."
"Do
I have to sign a paper?" Slutsky's voice was a bit hoarse.
"Certainly. This is business, Mr.
Slutsky." "Well, I don't know. Dreamers are hard to come by, I
hear."
"They are. They are. But your son, Mr.
Slutsky, is not a dreamer yet. He might never be. Five hundred dollars a year
is a gamble for us. It's not a gamble for you. When he's finished high school,
it may turn out he's not a dreamer, yet you've lost nothing. You've gained
maybe four thousand dollars altogether. If he is a dreamer, he'll make a nice living and you certainly haven't lost
then."
"He'll need special
training, won't he?"
"Oh,
yes, most intensive. But we don't have to worry about that till after he's
finished high school. Then, after two years with us, he'll be developed. Rely
on me, Mr. Slutsky."
"Will you guarantee
that special training?"
Weill,
who had been shoving a paper across the desk at Slutsky, and punching a pen
wrong-side-to at him, put the pen down and chuckled, "Guarantee? No. How
can we when we don't know for sure yet if he's a real talent? Still, the five
hundred a year will stay yours."
Slutsky
pondered and shook his head. "I tell you straight out, Mr. Weill— After
your man arranged to have us come here, I called Luster-Think. They said
they'll guarantee training."
Weill sighed. "Mr. Slutsky, I don't like
to talk against a competitor. If they say they'll guarantee training, they'll
do as they say, but they can't make a boy a dreamer if he hasn't got it in him,
training or not. If they take a plain boy without the proper talent and put him
through a development course, they'll ruin him. A dreamer he won't be, that I
guarantee you. And a normal human being he won't be, either. Don't take the
chance of doing it to your son.
"Now
Dreams, Inc. will be perfectly honest with you. If he can be a dreamer, we'll
make him one. If not, we'll give him back to you without having tampered with
him and say, 'Let him learn a trade.' He'll be better and healthier that way. I
tell you, Mr. Slutsky—I have sons and daughters and grandchildren so I know
what I say—I would not allow a child of mine to be pushed into dreaming if he's
not ready for it. Not for a million dollars."
Slutsky
wiped his mouth with the back of his hand and reached for the pen. "What
does this say?"
"This
is just an option. We pay you a hundred dollars in cash right now. No strings
attached. We'll study the boy's reverie. If we feel it's worth following up,
we'll call you in again and make the five-hundred-dollar-a-year deal. Leave
yourself in my hands, Mr. Slutsky, and don't worry. You won't be sorry."
Slutsky signed.
Weill
passed the document through the file slot and handed an envelope to Slutsky.
Five
minutes later, alone in the office, he placed the un-freezer over his own head
and absorbed the boy's reverie intently. It was a typically childish daydream.
First Person was at the controls of the plane, which looked like a compound of
illustrations out of the filmed thrillers that still circulated among those who
lacked the time, desire or money for dream-cylinders.
When
he removed the unfreezer, he found Dooley looking at him.
"Well,
Mr. Weill, what do you think?" said Dooley, with an eager and proprietary
air.
"Could
be, Joe. Could be. He has the overtones and for a ten-year-old boy without a
scrap of training it's hopeful. When the plane went through a cloud, there was
a distinct sensation of pillows. Also the smell of clean sheets, which was an
amusing touch. We can go with him a ways."
"Good." Joe
beamed happily at Weill's approval.
"But
I tell you, Joe, what we really need is to catch them still sooner. And why
not? Some day, Joe, every child will be tested at birth. A difference in the
brain there positively must be and it should be found. Then we could separate
the dreamers at the very beginning."
"Hell,
Mr. Weill," said Dooley, looking hurt. "What would happen to my job
then?"
Weill
laughed. "No cause to worry yet, Joe. It won't happen in our lifetimes. In
mine, certainly not. We'll be depending on good talent scouts like you for many
years. You just watch the playgrounds and the streets"—Weill's gnarled
hand dropped to Dooley's shoulder with a gentle, approving pressure—" and
find us a few more Hillarys and Janows and Luster-Think won't ever catch
us.—Now get out. I want lunch and then I'll be ready for my 2 o'clock appointment. The government, Joe, the government." And he
winked portentously.
Jesse
Weill's 2 o'clock appointment was with a young man,
apple-cheeked, spectacled, sandy-haired and glowing with the intensity of a man
with a mission. He presented his credentials across Weill's desk and revealed
himself to be John J. Byrne, an agent of the Department of Arts and Sciences.
"Good
afternoon, Mr. Byrne," said Weill. "In what way can I be of
service?"
"Are
we private here7" asked the agent. He had an unexpected baritone.
"Quite private."
"Then,
if you don't mind, I'll ask you to absorb this." Byrne produced a small
and battered cylinder and held it out between thumb and forefinger.
Weill
took it, hefted it, turned it this way and that and said with a
denture-revealing smile, "Not the product of Dreams, Inc., Mr.
Byrne."
"I
didn't think it was," said the agent. "I'd still like you to absorb
it. I'd set the automatic cutoff for about a minute, though."
"That's
all that can be endured?" Weill pulled the receiver to his desk and
placed the cylinder in the unfreeze compartment. He removed it, polished
either end of the cylinder with his handkerchief and tried again. "It
doesn't make good contact," he said. "An amateurish job."
He
placed the cushioned unfreeze helmet over his skull and adjusted the temple
contacts, then set the automatic cutoff. He leaned back and clasped his hands
over his chest and began absorbing.
His
fingers grew rigid and clutched at his jacket. After the cutoff had brought
absorption to an end, he removed the unfreezer and looked faintly angry.
"A raw piece," he said. "It's lucky I'm an old man so that such
things no longer bother me."
Byrne
said stiffly, "It's not the worst we've found. And the fad is
increasing."
Weill
shrugged. "Pornographic dreamies. It's a logical development, I
suppose."
The
government man said, "Logical or not, it represents a deadly danger for
the moral fiber of the nation."
"The
moral fiber," said Weill, "can take a lot of beating. Erotica of one
form or another has been circulated all through history."
"Not
like this, sir. A direct mind-to-mind stimulation is much more effective than
smoking-room stories or filthy pictures. Those must be filtered through the
senses and lose some of their effect in that way."
Weill
could scarcely argue that point. He said, "What would you nave me
do?"
"Can you suggest a
possible source for this cylinder?"
"Mr. Byrne, I'm not a
policeman."
"No, no, I'm not
asking you to do our work for us. The
Department
is quite capable of conducting its own investigations. Can you help us, I
mean, from your own specialized knowledge? You say your company did not put
out that filth. Who did?"
"No
reputable dream-distributor. I'm sure of that. It's too cheaply made."
"That could have been
done on purpose."
"And no professional
dreamer originated it."
"Are
you sure, Mr. Weill? Couldn't dreamers do this sort of thing for some small
illegitimate concern for money— or for fun?"
"They
could, but not this particular one. No overtones. It's two-dimensional. Of
course, a thing like this doesn't need overtones."
"What do you mean,
overtones?"
Weill laughed gently,
"You are not a dreamie fan?"
Byrne
tried not to look virtuous and did not entirely succeed. "I prefer
music."
"Well,
that's all right, too," said Weill, tolerantly, "but it makes it a
little harder to explain overtones. Even people who absorb dreamies might not
be able to explain if you asked them. Still they'd know a dreamie was no good
if the overtones were missing, even if they couldn't tell you why. Look, when
an experienced dreamer goes into reverie, he doesn't think a story like in the
old-fashioned television or book-films. It's a series of little visions. Each
one has several meanings. If you studied them carefully, you'd find maybe five
or six. While absorbing them in the ordinary way, you would never notice, but
careful study shows it. Believe me, my psychological staff puts in long hours
on just that point. All the overtones, the different meanings, blend together
into a mass of guided emotion. Without them, everything would be flat,
tasteless.
"Now
this morning, I tested a young boy. A ten-year-old with possibilities. A cloud
to him isn't just a cloud, it's a pillow too. Having the sensations of both, it
was more than either. Of course, the boy's very primitive. But when he's
through with his schooling, he'll be trained and disciplined. He'll be
subjected to all sorts of sensations. He'll store up experience. He'll study
and analyze classic dreamies of the past. He'll leam how to control and direct
his thoughts, though, mind you, I have always said that when a good dreamer
improvises—"
Weill
halted abruptly, then proceeded'in less impassion-ated tones, "I shouldn't
get excited. All I'm trying to bring out now is that every professional dreamer
has his own type of overtones which he can't mask. To an expert it's like
signing his name on the dreamie. And I, Mr. Byrne, know all the signatures. Now
that piece of dirt you brought me has no overtones at all. It was done by an
ordinary person. A little talent, maybe, but like you and me, he can't
think."
Byrne
reddened a trifle. "Not everyone can't think, Mr.
Weill, even if they don't make dreamies."
"Oh,
tush," and Weill wagged his hand in the air. "Don't be angry with
what an old man says. I don't mean think as
in reason. I mean think as
in dream. We all can dream after a fashion, just like
we all can run. But can you and I run a mile in under four minutes? You and I can talk but are we Daniel Websters? Now when I think of a steak, I
think of the word. Maybe I have a quick picture of a brown steak on a platter. Maybe you have a better pictori-alization of
it and you can see the crisp fat and the onions and the baked potato. I don't
know. But a dreamer
. . . He sees it and smells
it and tastes it and everything about it, with the charcoal and the satisfied
feeling in the stomach and the way the knife cuts through it and a hundred
other things all at once. Very sensual. Very sensual. You and I can't do
it."
"Well
then," said Byrne, "no professional dreamer has done this. That's
something anyway." He put the cylinder in his inner jacket pocket. "I
hope we'll have your full cooperation in squelching this sort of thing."
"Positively, Mr.
Byrne. With a whole heart."
"I
hope so." Byrne spoke with a consciousness of power. "It's not up to
me, Mr. Weill, to say what will be done and what won't be done, but this sort
of thing"—he tapped the cylinder he had brought—"will make it awfully
tempting to impose a really strict censorship on dreamies."
He rose. "Good day, Mr. Weill."
"Good day, Mr. Byrne.
I'll hope always for the best."
Francis
Belanger burst into Jesse Weill's office in his usual steaming tizzy, his
reddish hair disordered and his face aglow with worry and a mild perspiration.
He was brought up sharply by the sight of Weill's head cradled in the crook of
his elbow and bent on the desk until only the glimmer of white hair was
visible.
Belanger swallowed.
"Boss?"
Weill's head lifted.
"It's you, Frank?"
"What's the matter,
boss? Are you sick?"
"I'm
old enough to be sick, but I'm on my feet. Staggering, but on my feet. A
government man was here."
"What did he
want?"
"He
threatens censorship. He brought a sample of what's going round. Cheap dreamies
for bottle parties."
"God damn!" said
Belanger, feelingly.
"The
only trouble is that morality makes for good campaign fodder. They'll be
hitting out everywhere. And to tell the truth, we're vulnerable, Frank."
"We
are? Our stuff is clean. We
play up adventure and romance."
Weill
thrust out his lower lip and wrinkled his forehead. "Between us, Frank, we
don't have to make believe. Clean? It depends on how you look at it. It's not
for publication, maybe, but you know and I know that every dreamie has its
Freudian connotations. You can't deny it."
"Sure, if you look for it. If you're a psychiatrist—"
"If
you're an ordinary person, too. The ordinary observer doesn't know it's there
and maybe he couldn't tell a phallic symbol from a mother image even if you
pointed them out. Still, his subconscious knows. And it's the connotations
that make many a dreamie click."
"All
right, what's the government going to do? Clean up the subconscious?"
"It's
a problem. I don't know what they're going to do. What we have on our side, and
what I'm mainly depending on, is the fact that the public loves its dreamies
and won't give them up.—Meanwhile, what did you come in for? You want to see me
about something, I suppose?"
Belanger
tossed an object onto Weill's desk and shoved his shirt-tail deeper into his
trousers.
Weill
broke open the glistening plastic cover and took out the enclosed cylinder. At
one end was engraved in a too-fancy script in pastel blue: Along the Himalayan Trail. It bore the mark of Luster-Think.
"The Competitor's Product." Weill
said it with capitals and his lips twitched. "It hasn't been published
yet. Where did you get it, Frank?"
"Never mind. I just
want you to absorb it."
Weill
sighed. "Today, everyone wants me to absorb dreams. Frank, it's not
dirty?"
Belanger
said testily, "It has your Freudian symbols. Narrow crevasses between the
mountain peaks. I hope that won't bother you."
"I'm
an old man. It stopped bothering me years ago, but that other thing was so
poorly done, it hurt.—All right, let's see what you've got here."
Again
the recorder. Again the unfreezer over his skull and at the temples. This time,
Weill rested back in his chair for fifteen minutes or more, while Francis
Belanger went hurriedly through two cigarettes.
When
Weill removed the headpiece and blinked dream out of his eyes, Belanger said,
"Well, what's your reaction, boss?"
Weill
corrugated his forehead. "It's not for me. It was repetitious. With
competition like this, Dreams, Inc. doesn't have to worry yet."
"That's
your mistake, boss. Luster-Think's going to win with stuff like this. We've got
to do something."
"Now, Frank—"
"No, you listen. This
is the coming thing."
"This?"
Weill stared with
half-humorous dubiety at the cylinder. "It's amateurish. It's repetitious.
Its overtones are very unsubtle. The snow had a distinct lemon sherbet taste.
Who tastes lemon sherbet in snow these days, -Frank? In the old days, yes.
Twenty years ago, maybe. When Lyman Harrison first made his Snow Symphonies for
sale down south, it was a big thing. Sherbet and candy-striped mountain tops
and sliding down chocolate-covered cliffs. It's slapstick, Frank. These days it
doesn't go."
"Because,"
said Belanger, "you're not up with the times, boss, I've got to talk to
you straight. When you started the dreamie business, when you bought up the
basic patents and began putting them out, dreamies were luxury stuff. The
market was small and individual. You could afford to turn out specialized
dreamies and sell them to people at high prices."
"I know," said Weill, "and we've kept that up. But also we've opened a rental business for the masses."
"Yes,
we have and it's not enough. Our dreamies have subtlety, yes. They can be used
over and over again. The tenth time you're still finding new things, still
getting new enjoyment. But how many people are connoisseurs? And another thing.
Our stuff is strongly individualized. They're First Person."
"Well?"
"Well,
Luster-Think is opening dream-palaces. They've opened one with three hundred
booths in Nashville. You walk in, take your seat, put on your unfreezer and get
your dream. Everyone in the audience gets the same one."
"I've
heard of it, Frank, and it's been done before. It didn't work the first time
and it won't work now. You want to know why it won't work? Because in the first
place, dreaming is a private thing. Do you like your neighbor to know what
you're dreaming? In the second place, in a dream palace the dreams have to
start on schedule, don't they? So the dreamer has to dream not when he wants to
but when some palace manager says he should. Finally, a dream one person likes,
another person doesn't like. In those three hundred booths, I guarantee you, a
hundred and fifty people are dissatisfied. And if they're dissatisfied, they
won't come back."
Slowly,
Belanger rolled up his sleeves and opened his collar. "Boss," he
said, "you're talking through your hat. What's the use of proving they
won't work? They are working. The word came through today that
Luster-Think is breaking ground for a thousand-booth palace in St. Louis.
People can get used to public dreaming, if everyone else in the same room is
having the same dream. And they can adjust themselves to having it at a given
time, as long as it's cheap and convenient.
"Damn it, boss, it's a social affair. A
boy and a girl go to a dream-palace and absorb some cheap romantic thing with
stereotyped overtones and commonplace situations, but still they come out with
stars sprinkling their hair. They've had the same dream together. They've gone
through identical sloppy emotions. They're in tune, boss. You bet they go back to the
dream-palace, and all their friends go, too." "And if they don't like
the dream?" "That's the point. That's the nub of the whole thing.
They're
bound to like it. If you prepare Hillary specials with wheels within wheels
within wheels, with surprise twists on the third-level undertones, with clever
shifts of significance and all the other things we're so proud of, why,
naturally, it won't appeal to everyone. Specialized dreamies are for
specialized tastes. But Luster-Think is turning out simple jobs in Third Person
so both sexes can be hit at once. Like what you've just absorbed. Simple,
repetitious, commonplace. They're aiming at the lowest common denominator. No
one will love it, maybe, but no one will hate it."
Weill
sat silent for a long time and Belanger watched him. Then Weill said,
"Frank, I started on quality and I'm staying there. Maybe, you're right.
Maybe dream-palaces are the coming thing. If so we'll open them, but we'll use
good stuff. Maybe Luster-Think underestimates ordinary people. Let's go slowly
and not panic. I have based all my policies on the theory that there's always a
market for quality. Sometimes, my boy, it would surprise you how big a
market."
"Boss—"
The sounding of the intercom interrupted
Belanger. "What is it, Ruth?" said Weill.
The
voice of his secretary said, "It's Mr. Hillary, si/. He wants to see you
right away. He says it's important."
"Hillary?"
Weill's voice registered shock. Then, "Wait five minutes, Ruth, then send
him in."
Weill
turned to Belanger. "Today, Frank, is definitely not one of my good days.
A dreamer should be at home with his thinker. And Hillary's our best dreamer,
so he especially should be at home. What do you suppose is wrong with
him?"
Belanger,
still brooding over Luster-Think and dream-palaces, said shortly, "Call
him in and find out."
"In
one minute. Tell me, how was his last dream? I haven't absorbed the one that came
in last week."
Belanger
came down to earth. He wrinkled his nose. "Not so good."
"Why not?"
"It
was ragged. Too jumpy. I don't mind sharp transitions for the liveliness, you
know, but there's got to be some connection, even if only on a deep
level."
"Is it a total
loss?"
"No
Hillary dream is a total
loss. It took a lot of
editing though. We cut it down quite a bit and spliced in some odd pieces he'd
sent us now and then. You know, detached scenes. It's still not Grade A, but it
will pass."
"You told him about
this, Frank?"
"Think
I'm crazy, boss? Think I'm going to say a harsh word to a dreamer?"
And
at that point the door opened and Weill's comely young secretary smiled Sherman
Hillary into the office.
Sherman
Hillary, at the age of 31, could have
been recognized as a dreamer by anyone. His eyes, though un-spectacled, had
nevertheless the misty look of one who either needs glasses or who rarely
focuses on anything mundane. He was of average height but underweight, with
black hair that needed cutting, a narrow chin, a pale skin and a troubled look.
He
muttered, "Hello, Mr. Weill," and half-nodded in hangdog fashion in
the direction of Belanger.
Weill
said, heartily, "Sherman, my boy, you look fine. What's the matter? A
dream is cooking only so-so at home? You're worried about it?—Sit down, sit
down."
The
dreamer did, sitting at the edge of the chair and holding his thighs stiffly
together as though to be ready for instant obedience to a possible order to
stand up again.
He said, "I've come to
tell you, Mr. Weill, I'm quitting."
"Quitting?"
"I don't want to dream
anymore, Mr. Weill."
Weill's
old face looked older now than at any time during the day. "Why,
Sherman?"
The dreamer's lips twisted. He blurted out,
"Because I'm not living,
Mr. Weill. Everything
passes me by. It wasn't so bad at first. It was even relaxing. I'd dream evenings,
weekends when I felt like it or any other time. And when I felt like it I
wouldn't. But now, Mr. Weill, I'm an old pro. You tell me I'm one of the best
in the business and the industry looks to me to think up new subtleties and new
changes on the old reliables like the flying reveries, and the worm-turning
skits."
Weill said, "And is anyone better than
you, Sherman? Your little sequence on leading an orchestra is selling steadily
after ten years."
"All right, Mr. Weill. I've done my
part. It's gotten so I don't go out any more. I neglect my wife. My little girl
doesn't know me. Last week we went to a dinner party— Sarah made me—and I don't
remember a bit of it. Sarah says I was sitting on the couch all evening just
staring at nothing and humming. She said everyone kept looking at me. She cried
all night. I'm tired of things like that, Mr. Weill. I want to be a normal
person and live in this world. I promised her I'd quit and I will, so it's
goodby, Mr. Weill." Hillary stood up and held out his hand awkwardly.
Weill
waved it gently away. "If you want to quit, Sherman, it's all right. But
do an old man a favor and let me explain something to you."
"I'm not going to change my mind,"
said Hillary. "I'm not going to try to make you. I just want to explain
something. I'm an old man and even before you were born I was in this business,
so I like to talk about it. Humor me, Sherman? Please?"
Hillary
sat down. His teeth clamped down on his lower lip and he stared sullenly at his
fingernails.
Weill
said, "Do you know what a dreamer is, Sherman? Do you know what he means
to ordinary people? Do you know what it is to be like me, like Frank Belanger,
like your wife Sarah? To have crippled minds that can't imagine, that can't
build up thoughts? People like myself, ordinary people, would like to escape
just once in a while this life of ours. We can't. We need help.
"In olden times it was books, plays,
movies, radio, television. They gave us make-believe, but that wasn't- important.
What was important was that for a little while our own
imaginations were stimulated. We could think of handsome lovers and beautiful
princesses. We could be attractive, witty, strong, capable—everything we
weren't.
"But
always the passing of the dream from dreamer to absorber was not perfect. It
had to be translated into words in one way or another. The best dreamer in the
world might not be able to get any of it into words. And the best writer in the
world could put only the smallest part of his dreams into words. You
understand?
"But
now, with dream-recording, any man can dream. You, Sherman, and a handful of
men like you supply those dreams directly and exactly. It's straight from your
head into ours, full strength. You dream for a hundred million people every
time you dream. You dream a hundred million dreams at once. This is a great
thing, my boy. You give all those people a glimpse of something they could not
have by themselves."
Hillary mumbled, "I've done my share."
He rose desperately to his feet. "I'm through. I don't care what you say.
And if you want to sue me for breaking our contract, go ahead and sue. I don't
care."
Weill
stood up too. "Would I sue you?—Ruth," he spoke into the intercom,
"bring in our copy of Mr. Hillary's contract."
He waited. So did Hillary and Belanger. Weill
smiled faintly and his yellowed fingers drummed softly on his desk.
His
secretary brought in the contract. Weill took it, showed its face to Hillary
and said, "Sherman, my boy, unless you want to be with me, it's not right you should stay."
Then
before Belanger could make more than the beginning of a horrified gesture to
stop him, he tore the contract into four pieces and tossed them down the
waste-chute. "That's all."
Hillary's
hand shot out to seize Weill's. "Thanks, Mr. Weill," he said,
earnestly, his voice husky. "You've always treated me very well, and I'm
grateful. I'm sorry it had to be like this."
"It's all right, my
boy. It's all right."
Half
in tears, still muttering thanks, Sherman Hillary left.
"For the love of Pete, boss, why did you
let him go?" demanded Belanger. "Don't you see the game? He'll be
going straight to Luster-Think. They've bought him off."
Weill
raised his hand. "You're wrong. You're quite wrong. I know the boy and
this would not be his style. Besides," he added dryly, "Ruth is a
good secretary and she knows what to bring me when I ask for a dreamer's
contract. The real contract is still in the safe, believe me.
"Meanwhile,
a fine day I've had. I had to argue with a father to give me a chance at new
talent, with a government man to avoid censorship, with you to keep from
adopting fatal policies, and now with my best dreamer to keep him from leaving.
The father I probably won out over. The government man and you, I don't know.
Maybe yes, maybe no. But about Sherman Hillary, at least, there is no question.
The dreamer will be back." "How do you know?"
Weill
smiled at Belanger and crinkled his cheeks into a network of fine lines.
"Frank, my boy, you know how to edit dreamies so you think you know all
the tools and machines of the trade. But let me tell you something. The most
important tool in the dreamie business is the dreamer himself. He is the one
you have to understand most of all, and I understand them.
"Listen.
When I was a youngster—there were no dreamies then—I knew a fellow who wrote
television scripts. He would complain to me bitterly that when someone met him
for the first time and found out who he was, they would say: Where do you get those crazy ideas?
"They
honestly didn't know. To them it was an impossibility to even think of one of
them. So what could my friend say? He used to talk,to me about it and tell me:
'Could I say, "I don't know"? When I go to bed I can't sleep for
ideas dancing in my head. When I shave I cut myself; when I talk I lose track of
what I'm saying; when I drive I take my life in my hands. And always because
ideas, situations, dialogues are spinning and twisting in my mind. I can't tell
you where I get my ideas. Can you tell me, maybe, your trick of not getting ideas, so I, too, can have a little peace?'
"You
see, Frank, how it is. You can stop work here anytime. So can I. This
is our job, not our life. But not Sherman Hillary. Wherever he goes, whatever
he does, he'll dream. While he lives, he must think; while he thinks, he must dream.
We don't hold him prisoner, our contract isn't an iron wall for him. His own
skull is his prisoner. He'll be back. What can he do?"
Belanger
shrugged. "If what you say is right, I'm sort of sorry for the guy."
Weill nodded sadly, "I'm sorry for all of
them. Through the years, I've found out one thing. It's their business: making
people happy. Other
people."
THE PUBLIC
HATING
Steve Allen
Stephen
Patrick Valentine William Allen is the author of six books (most recently: letter to a Conservative, 1965) and about 2,000 songs, among them
"Gravy Waltz" (for which he won a Grammy Award), "This Could Be
the Start of Something," and "Picnic." Born in New York City in
1921, he became a radio announcer in 1942, worked as comedian, disc jockey,
scriptwriter, actor, musician, in radio, films, and television until (and
after) starting his own TV show in 1950.
"The
Public Hating" was selected for the 1st Annual from Bluebook, January,
1955, and was included in Allen's first short-story collection. Fourteen for Tonight (1955).
The
weather was a little cloudy on that September 9, 1978, and here and there in the crowds that surged
up the ramps into the stadium people were looking at the sky and then at their
neighbors and squinting and saying, "Hope she doesn't rain."
On
television the weatherman had forecast slight cloudiness but no showers. It
was not cold. All over the neighborhood surrounding the stadium, people poured
out of street-cars and busses and subways. In ant-like lines they crawled
across streets, through turnstiles, up stairways, along ramps, through gates,
down aisles.
Laughing
and shoving restlessly, damp-palmed with excitement, they came shuffling into
the great concrete bowl, some stopping to go to the restrooms, some buying popcorn,
some taking free pamphlets from the uniformed attendants.
Everything
was free this particular day. No tickets had been sold for the event. The
public proclamations had
simply been made in the newspapers and on TV,
and over 65,000 people had responded.
For
weeks, of course, the papers had been suggesting that the event would take
place. All during the trial, even as early as the selection of the jury, the
columnists had slyly hinted at the inevitability of the outcome. But it had
only been official since yesterday. The television networks had actually gotten
a slight jump on the papers. At six o'clock the government had taken over all
network facilities for a brief five-minute period during which the announcement
was made.
"We
have all followed with great interest," the Premier had said, looking calm
and handsome in a gray double-breasted suit, "the course of the trial of
Professor Kette-ridge. Early this afternoon the jury returned a verdict of
guilty. This verdict having been confirmed within the hour by the Supreme
Court, in the interests of time-saving, the White House has decided to make the
usual prompt official announcement. There will be a public hating tomorrow. The
time: 2:30 p.m. The place: Yankee Stadium in New York City.
Your assistance is earnestly requested. Those of you in the New York area will
find. . . ."
The
voice had gone on, filling in other details, and in the morning, the early
editions of the newspapers included pictures captioned, "Bronx couple
first in line," and "Students wait all night to view hating" and
"Early birds."
By
one-thirty in the afternoon there was not an empty seat in the stadium and
people were beginning to fill up a few of the aisles. Special police began to
block off the exits and word was sent down to the street that no more people
could be admitted. Hawkers slipped through the crowd selling cold beer and
hot-dogs.
Sitting
just back of what would have been first base had the Yankees not been playing
in Cleveland, Frederic Traub stared curiously at the platform in the middle of
the field. It was about twice the size of a prize-fighting ring. In the middle
of it there was a small raised section on which was placed a plain wooden kitchen
chair.
To
the left of the chair there were seating accommodations for a small group of
dignitaries. Downstage, so to speak, there was a speaker's lectern and a
battery of microphones. The platform was hung with bunting and pennants.
The crowd was beginning to
hum ominously.
At
two minutes after two o'clock a small group of men filed out onto the field
from a point just back of home plate. The crowd buzzed more loudly for a moment
and then burst into applause. The men carefully climbed a few wooden steps,
walked in single file across the platform, and seated themselves in the chairs
set out for them. Traub turned around and was interested to observe high in the
press box, the winking red lights of television cameras.
"Remarkable,"
said Traub softly to his companion.
"I suppose," said
the man. "But effective."
"I
guess that's right," said Traub. "Still, it all seems a little
strange to me. We do things rather differently."
"That's what makes
horse-racing," said his companion.
Traub listened for a moment to the voices
around him. Surprisingly, no one seemed to be discussing the business at hand.
Baseball, movies, the weather, gossip, personal small-talk, a thousand-and-one
subjects were introduced. It was almost as if they were trying not to mention
the hating.
His friend's voice broke in
on Traub's reverie.
"Think
you'll be okay when we get down to business? I've seen 'em keel over."
"I'll
be all right," said Traub. Then he shook his head. "But I still can't
believe it."
"What do you
mean?"
"Oh,
you know, the whole thing. How it started. How you found you could do it."
"Beats
the hell out of me," said the other man. "I think it was that guy at
Duke University first came up with the idea. The mind over matter thing has
been around for a long time, of course. But this guy, he was the first one to
prove scientifically that mind can control matter."
"Did it with dice, I
believe," Traub said.
"Yeah, that's it. First he found some
guys who could drop a dozen or so dice down a chute of some kind and actually
control the direction they'd take. Then they discovered the secret—it was
simple. The guys who could control the dice were simply the guys who thought they could.
"Then one time they got the idea of
taking the dice into an auditorium and having about 2,000 people concentrate
on forcing the dice one way or the other. That did it. It was the most natural
thing in the world when you think of it. If one horse can pull a heavy load so
far and so fast it figures that 10 horses can pull it a lot farther and a lot
faster. They had those dice fallin' where they wanted 'em 80 percent of the
time."
"When
did they first substitute a living organism for the dice?" Traub asked.
"Damned
if I know," said the man. "It was quite a few years ago and at first
the government sort of clamped down on the thing. There was a little last-ditch
fight from the churches, I think. But they finally realized you couldn't stop
it."
"Is this an unusually large crowd?"
"Not
for a political prisoner. You take a rapist or a murderer now, some of them
don't pull more than maybe twenty, thirty thousand. The people just don't get
stirred up enough."
The
sun had come out from behind a cloud now and Traub watched silently as large
map-shaped shadows moved majestically across the grass.
"She's warming
up," someone said.
"That's right," a
voice agreed. "Gonna be real nice."
Traub
leaned forward and lowered his head as he retied the laces on his right shoe
and in the next instant he was shocked to attention by a guttural roar from the
crowd that vibrated the floor.
In
distant right center-field, three men were walking toward the platform. Two
were walking together, the third was slouched in front of them, head down, his
gait unsteady.
Traub had thought he was going to be all
right but now, looking at the tired figure being prodded toward second base,
looking at the bare, bald head, he began to feel slightly sick.
It
seemed to take forever before the two guards jostled the prisoner up the stairs
and toward the small kitchen chair.
When
he reached it and seated himself the crowd roared again. A tall, distinguished
man stepped to the speaker's lectern and cleared his throat, raising his right
hand in an appeal for quiet. "All right," he said, "all
right."
The
mob slowly fell silent. Traub clasped his hands tightly together. He felt a
little ashamed.
"All
right," said the speaker. "Good afternoon, ladies and gentlemen. On
behalf of the President of the United States I welcome you to another Public
Hating. This particular affair," he said, "as you know is directed
against the man who was yesterday judged guilty in United States District Court
here in New York City—Professor Arthur Ketteridge."
At the mention of Ketteridge's name the crowd
made a noise like an earthquake-rumble. Several pop-bottles were thrown,
futilely, from the center-field bleachers.
"We
will begin in just a moment," said the speaker, "but first I should
like to introduce the Reverend Charles Fuller, of the Park Avenue Reborn
Church, who will make the invocation."
A
small man with glasses stepped forward, replaced the first speaker at the
microphone, closed his eyes, and threw back .his head.
"Our
Heavenly Father," he said, "to whom we are indebted for all the
blessings of this life, grant, we beseech Thee, that we act today in justice
and in the spirit of truth. Grant, O Lord, we pray Thee, that what we are about
to do here today will render us the humble servants of Thy divine will. For it
is written the
wages of sin is death. Search deep into this man's heart for the
seed of repentance if there be such, and if there be not, plant it therein, O
Lord, in Thy goodness and mercy."
There
was a slight pause. The Reverend Fuller coughed and then said,
"Amen."
The crowd, which had stood quietly during the
prayer, now sat down and began to buzz again.
The
first speaker rose. "All right," he said. "You know we all have
a job to do. And you know why we have to do it."
"Yes!" screamed thousands of
voices.
"Then
let us get to the business at hand. At this time I would like to introduce to you a very great American who, to use the old
phrase, needs no introduction. Former president of Harvard University, current
adviser to the Secretary of State, ladies and gentlemen, Dr. Howard S.
Welt-mer!"
A wave of applause vibrated
the air.
Dr. Weltmer stepped forward, shook hands with
the speaker, and adjusted the microphone. "Thank you," he said.
"Now, we won't waste any more time here since what we are about to do will
take every bit of our energy and concentration if it is to be successfully
accomplished. I ask you all," he said, "to direct your unwavering
attention toward the man seated in the chair to my left here, a man who in my
opinion is the most despicable criminal of our time—Professor Arthur Ketteridge!"
The mob shrieked.
"I
ask you," said Weltmer, "to rise. That's it, everybody stand up. Now,
I want every one of you ... I
understand we have upwards of seventy thousand people here today ... I want every single one of you to stare
directly at this fiend in human form, Ketteridge. I want you to let him know by
the wondrous power,that lies in the strength of your emotional reservoirs, I
want you to let him know that he is a criminal, that he is worse than a
murderer, that he has committed treason, that he is not loved by anyone,
anywhere in the universe, and that he is, rather, despised with a vigor equal
in heat to the power of the sun itself!"
People
around Traub were shaking their fists now. Their eyes were narrowed; their
mouths turned down at the corners. A woman fainted.
"Come on,"
shouted Weltmer. "Let's feel it!"
Under
the spell of the speaker Traub was suddenly horrified to find that his blood
was racing, his heart pounding. He felt anger surging up in him. He could not
believe he hated Ketteridge. But he could not deny he hated something.
"On
the souls of your mothers," Weltmer was saying, "on the future of
your children, out of your love for your country, I demand of you that you unleash
your power to despise. I want you to become ferocious. I want you to become as
the beasts of the jungle, as furious as they in the defense of their homes. Do
you hate this man?"
"Yes!" roared the
crowd.
"Fiend!" cried Weltmer, "Enemy
of the people— Do you hear, Ketteridge?"
Traub watched in dry-mouthed fascination as
the slumped figure in' the chair straightened up convulsively and jerked at his
collar. At this first indication that their power was reaching home the crowd
roared to a new peak of excitement.
"We
plead," said Weltmer, "with you people watching today on your
television sets, to join with us in hating this wretch. All over America stand
up, if you will, in your living rooms. Face the East. Face New York City, and
let anger flood your hearts. Speak it out, let it flow!"
A
man beside Traub sat down, turned aside, and vomited softly into a
handkerchief. Traub picked up the binoculars the man had discarded for the
moment and fastened them on Ketteridge's figure, twirling the focus-knob furiously.
In a moment the man leaped into the foreground. Traub saw that his eyes were
full of tears, that his body was wracked with sobs, that he was in obvious
pain.
"He
is not fit to live," Weltmer was shouting. "Turn your, anger upon
him. Channel it. Make it productive. Be not angry with your family, your
friends, your fellow citizens, but let your anger pour out in a violent
torrent on the head of this human devil," screamed Weltmer. "Come on!
Let's do it! Let's get it over with!"
At
that moment Traub was at last convinced of the enormity of Ketteridge's crime,
and Weltmer said, "All right, that's it. Now let's get down to brass
tacks. Let's concentrate on his right arm. Hate it, do you hear? Burn the flesh
from the bone! You can do it! Come on! Burn him alive!"
Traub stared unblinking through the
binoculars at Ketteridge's right arm as the prisoner leaped to his feet and
ripped off his jacket, howling. With his left hand he gripped his right forearm
and then Traub saw the flesh turning dark. First a deep red and then a livid
purple. The fingers contracted and Ketteridge whirled on his small platform
like a dervish, slapping his arm against his side.
"That's it," Weltmer called.
"You're doing it You're
doing it. Mind over matter! That's it. Bum
this offending flesh. Be as the avenging angels of the Lord. Smite this devil!
That's it!"
The
flesh was turning darker now, across the shoulders, as Ketteridge tore his
shirt off. Screaming, he broke away from his chair and leaped off the platform,
landing on his knees on the grass.
"Oh,
the power is wonderful," cried Weltmer. "You've got him. Now let's
really turn it on. Come on!"
Ketteridge
writhed on the grass and then rose and began running back and forth,
directionless, like a bug on a griddle.
Traub
could watch no longer. He put down the binoculars and staggered back up the
aisle.
Outside
the stadium he walked for 12 blocks before he hailed a cab.
YOU KNOW
WILLIE
Theodore R. Cogswell
Theodore R. Cogswell Is an Associate Professor of English at
Keystone College in Pennsylvania. Primarily a poet and songwriter, he published
thirty science-fantasy stories between 1952-1958, with only an occasional title
since then; a collection. The Waff Around the World, was published in 1962.
Born
in Ohio in 1918, Cogswell graduated from high school just in time to join the
International Brigade in Spain; back home, he wandered his way through several
colleges, with time out for the Pacific Theatre in World War II, and wound up
leaching English at the University of Minnesota, where Gordon Dickson and Poul
Anderson got him interested in writing science fantasy.
He
also was the founder and editor of the unique and sorely miked authors'
journal, the Proceedings of the Institute of Twenty-first
Century Studies.
Two of his songs, "Radiation Blues"
and "Blowup Blues", were reprinted in the 6th Annual. "You Know
Willie" originally appeared in Fantasy & Science
Fiction, May, 1957; it is reprinted here from the 3rd
SF Annual.
In the old
days there wouldn't have been any fuss about
Willie McCracken shooting a Negro, but these weren't the old days. The judge
sat sweating, listening to the voice from the state capital that roared through
the telephone receiver.
"But you can't hang no white man for
shooting no nigger!"
"Who said anything about hanging?"
said the voice impatiently. "I want it to look good, that's all. So don't
make it any half hour job—take two weeks if you have to."
The judge obediently took two weeks. There
was a long
424 Theodore Cogswell
parade
of witnesses for the defense and an equally long one for the prosecution, and
through it all the jury, having been duly instructed beforehand, sat gravely,
happy for a respite from the hot sun and fields—and the cash money that was
accruing to each of them at the rate of three dollars a day. A bright young
man was down from the capital to oversee all major matters, and as a result,
the trial of Willie McCracken was a model of juridical propriety.
The
prosecution made as strong a case against Willie as it could without bringing
in such prejudicial evidence as that the little garage the dead man had opened
after he came back from Korea had been taking business away from the one Willie
ran at an alarming rate, or that it was common knowledge that Willie was the
Thrice High Warlock of the local chapter of The Knights of the Flaming Sword
and in his official capacity had given the deceased one week to get out of town
or else.
There
were two important witnesses. One was very old and very black, the other wasn't
quite as young as she used to be but she was white. The first could technically
be classed as a witch—though there was another and more sonorous name for what
she was in the forgotten tribal language she used on ritual occasions—but
contrary to the ancient injunction, she had not only been permitted to live,
but to flourish in a modest fashion. There were few in the courtroom who had
not at one time or another made secret use of Aunt Hattie's services. And
although most of the calls had been for relatively harmless love potions or protective
amulets, there were enough who had called with darker things in mind to cause
her to be treated with unusual respect
Aunt
Hattie was the town's oldest inhabitant—legend had it that she was already a
grown woman when Lincoln larcenously freed the slaves—and the deceased had been
her only living blood relative.
Having
been duly sworn, she testified that the defendant, Willie McCracken, had come
to her cabin just as she was getting supper, asked for the deceased, and then
shot him between the eyes when he came to the door.
She
was followed by Willie's wife, a plumpish little blonde in an over-tight dress
who was obviously enjoying all the attention she was getting. She in turn swore
that Willie had been home in bed with her where he belonged at the time in
question. From the expressions on the jurymen's faces, it was obvious that they
were thinking that if he hadn't been, he was a darned fool.
There were eight Knights of the Flaming Sword
sitting around the table in Willie's kitchen. Willie pulled a jug from the
floor beside him, took a long swallow, and wiped his mouth nervously with the
hairy back of his hand. He looked up at the battered alarm clock on the shelf
over the sink and then lifted the jug again. When he set it down Pete Martin
reached over and grabbed it.
"Buck
up, Willie boy," he said as he shook the container to see how much was
left in it. "Ain't nobody going to get at you with us here."
Willie
shivered. "You ain't seen her squatting out under that Cottonwood every night like I have." He reached out
for the jug but Martin laughed and pulled it out of reach.
"You
lay off that corn and you won't be seeing Aunt Hattie every time you turn
around. The way you've been hitting the stuff since the trial it's a wonder you
ain't picking snakes up off the table by now."
"I
seen her, I tell you," said Willie sullenly. "Six nights running now
I seen her plain as day just sitting out under that tree waiting for the moon
to get full." He reached for the jug again but Martin pushed his hand
away.
"You've
had enough. Now you just sit there quiet like while I talk some sense. Aunt
Hattie's dead and Jackson's dead and they're both safe six foot under. I don't
blame you for getting your wind up after what she yelled in the courtroom
afore she keeled over, but just remember that there ain't no nigger the Knights
can't take care of, dead or alive. Now you go upstairs and get yourself a
little shut-eye. You're plumb beat. I don't think you've had six hours good
sleep since the finish of the trial. You don't notice Winnie Mae losing any
rest, do you?"
Willie
kneaded his bald scalp with thick fingers. "Couldn't sleep," he said
hoarsely. "Not with her out there. She said he'd come back first full moon
rise and every night it's been getting rounder and rounder."
"He
comes back, we'll fix him for you, Willie," said Martin in a soothing voice.
"Now you do like I said. Moon
426 Theodore Cogswell
won't
be up for a good two hours yet. You go get a little sleep and we'll call you in
plenty of time."
Willie
hesitated and then got to his feet and lumbered up the stairs. He was so tired
he staggered as he walked. When he got into the dark bedroom he pulled off his
clothes and threw himself down on the brass bed beside Winnie Mae. He tried to
keep awake but he couldn't. In a moment his heavy snores were blending with her
light delicate ones.
The
moonlight was strong and bright in the room when Willie woke. They hadn't
called him! From the kitchen below he heard a rumble of voices and then drunken
laughter. Slowly, as if hypnotized, he swung his fat legs over the side of the
bed and stumbled to the window. He tried to keep from looking but he couldn't.
She would be there, squatting beneath the old cottonwood, a shriveled little
black mummy that waited . . . waited . . . waited . . .
Willie
dug his knuckles suddenly into his eyes, rubbed hard, and then looked again.
There was nothing! Nothing where the thick old trunk met the ground but a dusty
clump of crab grass. He stood trembling, staring down at the refuse-littered
yard as if it was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen. There was
something healing in the calm flood of moonlight. The hard knot he had been
carrying inside his head dissolved and he felt strong and young again. He
wanted to shout, to caper around the room.
Winnie Mae mumbled in her sleep and he turned
to look at her. Her thin cotton nightgown was bunched up under her arms and she
lay, legs astraddle, her plump body gleaming whitely in the moonlight. She
whimpered as she pulled herself up out of her slumber and then closed her arms
around the heavy body that was pressing down on her.
"Remember
me," he whispered, "I'm Willie. You kuow Willie."
She giggled and pulled him tighter against
her. Her breath began to come faster and her fingers made little cat clawings
on his back. As she squirmed under him her hands crept higher, over his
shoulders, up his neck . . .
There
was a sudden explosion under him and a caterwauling scream of sheer horror.
Willie jerked back as her nails raked across his face, and then he felt a
sudden stabbing agony as she jabbed up with her knee. He staggered away from
the bed, his hand cupped over his bleeding face.
His
hands! Time slid to a nightmarish stop as his finger tips sent a message
pulsing down through nerve endings that his bald scalp had somehow sprouted a
thick mop of kinky hair. He jerked his hands down and held them cupped before
him. The fresh blood was black. in the moonlight, and not only the blood. He
spun toward the cracked mirror and saw himself for the first time. The flabby
body with its sagging belly was gone. In its place was that of a dark-skinned
stranger . . . but not a stranger.
His
fingers crept across his forehead looking for the small red bullet hole that
was no longer there.
And
then time started to rush forward again. Winnie Mae's screaming went on and on
and there was a rushing of heavy feet up the stairs from the kitchen.
He
tried to explain but there was a new softness to his speech that put the lie to
his stumbling words. When the door burst open he stood for a moment, hands stretched
out in supplication.
"No," he
whimpered. "I'm Willie. You know Willie."
As
they came slowly out of the shadows he broke. He took one slow step backward,
and then two, and then when he felt the low sill press against his calves,
turned and dove out the window onto the sloping roof. When he got to the ground
he tried again to explain but somebody remembered his gun.
Willie as he had been would have been run to
ground within the mile, but his new lithe body carried him effortlessly
through the night. If it hadn't been for the dogs he might have got away.
Someone
had a deck of cards and they all drew. Pete Martin was low man so he had to go
back after the gasoline.
ONE ORDINARY
DAY, WITH PEANUTS
Shirley Jackson
Shirley Jackson (1919—1965) wrote comparatively little
outright fantasy; virtually everything she wrote, whether macabre suspense
novel or domestic essay, was illuminated with a rare consciousness of the
fantastic quality of reality (and/or the reality of the fantastic and
incredible), a perception of truths one level farther in than those available
to most of us.
Her
most famous story was "The Lottery", first published in The New
Yorker in 1948, and then in the 1949 collection of the same title. Among her
other books were Life Among the Savages, We Have Always Lived in the Castle, The Bird's Nest and The Magic of Shirley Jackson. Most
of her short stories appeared in the larger-circulation quality magazines—Harper's, Story, Mademoiselle, American
Mercury, etc.—and
in such national women's magazines as Woman's Home Companion and McCalls. Five
short stories were published in Fantasy & Science Fiction between 1953 and 1958, including "One Ordinary Day, With
Peanuts" (January, 1955), which is reprinted here from the 1st Sf Annual.
Mr.
John
Philip
Johnson
shut his front door behind
him and came down his front steps into the bright morning with a feeling that
all was well with the world on this best of all days, and wasn't the sun warm
and good, and didn't his shoes feel comfortable after the resoling, and he knew
that he had undoubtedly chosen the precise very tie which belonged with the day
and the sun and his comfortable feet, and, after all, wasn't the world just a
wonderful place? In spite of the fact that he was a small man, and the tie was
perhaps a shade vivid, Mr. Johnson irradiated this feeling of well-being as he
came down the steps and onto the dirty sidewalk, and he smiled at people who
passed
him,
and some of them even smiled back. He stopped at the newsstand on the corner
and bought his paper, saying "Good morning"
with real conviction to the man who sold him the paper and the two or three
other people who were lucky enough to be buying papers when Mr. Johnson skipped
up. He remembered to fill his pockets with candy and peanuts, and then he set
out to get himself uptown. He stopped in a flower shop and bought a carnation
for bis buttonhole, and stopped almost immediately afterward to give the carnation
to a small child in a carriage, who looked at him dumbly, and then smiled, and
Mr. Johnson smiled, and the child's mother looked at Mr. Johnson for a minute
and then smiled too.
When
he had gone several blocks uptown, Mr. Johnson cut across the avenue and went
along a side street, chosen at random; he did not follow the same route every
morning, but preferred to pursue his eventful way in wide detours, more like a
puppy than a man intent upon business. It happened this morning that halfway
down the block a moving van was parked, and the furniture from an upstairs
apartment stood half on the sidewalk, half on the steps, while an amused group
of people loitered, examining the scratches on the tables and the worn spots on
the chairs, and a harassed woman, trying to watch a young child and the movers
and the furniture all at the same time, gave the clear impression of
endeavoring to shelter her private life from the people staring at her
belongings. Mr. Johnson stopped, and for a moment joined the crowd, and then he
came forward and, touching his hat civilly, said, "Perhaps I can keep an
eye on your little boy for you?"
The
woman turned and glared at him distrustfully, and Mr. Johnson added hastily,
"We'll sit right here on the steps." He beckoned to the little boy,
who hesitated and then responded agreeably to Mr. Johnson's genial smile. Mr.
Johnson brought out a handful of peanuts from his pocket and sat on the steps
with the boy, who at first refused the peanuts on the grounds that his mother
did not allow him to accept food from strangers; Mr. Johnson said that probably
his mother had not intended peanuts to be included, since elephants at the
circus ate them, and the boy considered, and then agreed solemnly. They sat on
the steps cracking peanuts in a comradely fashion, and Mr. Johnson said,
"So you're moving?"
"Yep," said the
boy.
"Where you
going?"
"Vermont."
"Nice place. Plenty of snow there. Maple
sugar, too; you like maple sugar?" "Sure."
"Plenty of maple sugar in Vermont. You
going to live on a farm?"
"Going
to live with Grandpa." "Grandpa like peanuts?" "Sure."
"Ought to take him some," said Mr.
Johnson, reaching into his pocket. "Just you and Mommy going?"
"Yep."
'Tell
you what," Mr. Johnson said. "You take some peanuts to eat on the
train."
The
boy's mother, after glancing at them frequently, had seemingly decided that Mr.
Johnson was trustworthy, because she had devoted herself wholeheartedly to
seeing that the movers did not—what movers rarely do, but every housewife
believes they will—crack a leg from her good table, or set a kitchen chair down
on a lamp. Most of the furniture was loaded by now, and she was deep in that
nervous stage when she knew there was something she had forgotten to
pack—hidden away in the back of a closet somewhere, or left at a neighbor's and
forgotten, or on the clothesline—and was trying to remember under stress what
it was.
"This all, lady?" the chief mover
said, completing her dismay.
Uncertainly, she nodded.
"Want
to go on the truck with the furniture, sonny?" the mover asked the boy,
and laughed. The boy laughed too and said to Mr. Johnson, "I guess I'll
have a good time at Vermont."
"Fine
time," said Mr. Johnson, and stood up. "Have one more peanut before
you go," he said to the boy.
The boy's mother said to Mr. Johnson,
"Thank you so much; it was a great help to me."
"Nothing at all," said Mr. Johnson
gallandy. "Where in Vermont are you going?"
The
mother looked at the little boy accusingly, as though he had given away a
secret of some importance, and said unwillingly, "Greenwich."
"Lovely
town," said Mr. Johnson. He took out a card, and wrote a name on the back.
"Very good friend of mine lives in Greenwich," he said. "Call on
him for anything you need. His wife makes the best doughnuts in town," he
added soberly to the little boy.
"Swell," said the
little boy.
"Goodby," said
Mr. Johnson.
He
went on, stepping happily with his new-shod feet, feeling the warm sun on his
back and on the top of his head. Halfway down the block he met a stray dog and
fed him a peanut.
At
the corner, where another wide avenue faced him, Mr. Johnson decided to go on
uptown again. Moving with comparative laziness, he was passed on either side by
people hurrying and frowning, and people brushed past him going the other
way, clattering along to get somewhere quickly. Mr. Johnson stopped on every
corner and waited patiently for the light to change, and he stepped out of the
way of anyone who seemed to be in any particular hurry, but one young lady came
too fast for him, and crashed wildly into him when he stooped to pat a kitten
which had run out onto the sidewalk from an apartment house and was now unable
to get back through the rushing feet.
"Excuse
me," said the young lady, trying frantically to pick up Mr. Johnson and
hurry on at the same time, "terribly sorry."
The kitten, regardless now of danger, raced
back to its home; "Perfectly all right," said Mr. Johnson, adjusting
himself carefully. "You seem to be in a hurry."
"Of
course I'm in a hurry," said the young lady. "I'm late."
She was extremely cross and the frown between
her eyes seemed well on its way to becoming permanent. She had obviously
awakened late, because she had not spent any extra time in making herself look
pretty, and her dress was plain and unadorned with collar or brooch, and her
lipstick was noticeably crooked. She tried to brush past Mr. Johnson, but,
risking her suspicious displeasure, he took her arm and said, "Please
wait."
"Look,"
she said ominously. "I ran into you and your lawyer can see my lawyer and
I will gladly pay all damages and all inconveniences suffered therefrom but
please this minute let me go because / am late."
"Late
for what?" said Mr. Johnson; he tried his winning smile on her but it did
no more than keep her, he suspected, from knocking him down again.
"Late
for work," she said between her teeth. "Late for my employment. I
have a job and if I am late I lose exactly so much an hour and I cannot really
afford what your pleasant conversation is costing me, be it ever so pleasant."
"I'll
pay for it," said Mr. Johnson. Now these were magic words, not necessarily
because they were true, or because she seriously expected Mr. Johnson to pay
for anything, but because Mr. Johnson's flat statement, obviously innocent of
irony, could not be, coming from Mr. Johnson, anything but the statement of a
responsible and truthful and respectable man.
"What do you mean?" she asked.
"I
said that since I am obviously responsible for your being late I shall
certainly pay for it."
"Don't
be silly," she said, and for the first time the frown disappeared. "I wouldn't expect you to pay for anything—a
few minutes ago I was offering to pay you. Anyway," she added, almost smiling, "it was my fault."
"What happens if you
don't go to work?"
She stared. "I don't
get paid."
"Precisely," said
Mr. Johnson.
"What
do you mean, precisely? If I don't show up at the office exactly twenty minutes
ago I lose a dollar and twenty cents an hour, or two cents a minute or . .
." She thought. "... Almost
a dime for the time I've spent talking to you."
Mr.
Johnson laughed, and finally she laughed, too. "You're late already,"
he pointed out. "Will you give me another four cents worth?"
"I don't understand
why."
"You'll
see," Mr. Johnson promised. He led her over to the side of the walk, next
to the buildings, and said, "Stand here," and went out into the rush
of people going both ways. Selecting and considering, as one who must make a
choice involving perhaps whole years of lives, he estimated the people going
by. Once he almost moved, and then at the last minute thought better of it and
drew back. Finally, from half a block away, he saw what he wanted, and moved
out into the center of the traffic to intercept a young man, who was hurrying,
and dressed as though he had awakened late, and frowning.
"Oof,"
said the young man, because Mr. Johnson had thought of no better way to
intercept anyone than the one the young woman had unwittingly used upon him.
"Where do you think you're going?" the young man demanded from the
sidewalk.
"I want to speak to
you," said Mr. Johnson ominously.
The
young man got up nervously, dusting himself and eyeing Mr. Johnson. "What
for?" he said. "What'd / do?"
"That's
what bothers me most about people nowadays," Mr. Johnson complained
broadly to the people passing. "No matter whether they've done anything or
not, they always figure someone's after them. About what you're going to
do," he told the young man.
"Listen,"
said the young man, trying to brush past him, "I'm late, and I don't have
any time to listen. Here's a dime, now get going."
"Thank
you," said Mr. Johnson, pocketing the dime. "Look," he said,
"what happens if you stop running?"
"I'm
late," said the young man, still trying to get past Mr. Johnson, who was
unexpectedly clinging.
"How
much do you make an hour?" Mr. Johnson demanded.
"A
communist, are you?" said the young man. "Now will you please let
me—"
"No," said Mr.
Johnson insistently, "how
much?"
"Dollar
fifty," said the young man. "And now will you—"
"You like adventure?"
The
young man stared, and, staring, found himself caught and held by Mr. Johnson's
genial smile; he almost smiled back and then repressed it and made an effort to
tear away. "I got to hurry," he
said.
"Mystery? Like surprises? Unusual and
exciting events?"
"You selling something?"
"Sure," said Mr.
Johnson. "You want to take a chance?"
The
young man hesitated, looked longingly up the avenue toward what might have
been his destination and then, when Mr. Johnson said, "I'll pay for
it," with his own peculiar and convincing emphasis, turned and said,
"Well, okay. But I got to see it
first, what I'm buying."
Mr.
Johnson, breathing hard, led the young man over to the side where the girl was
standing; she had been watching with interest Mr. Johnson's capture of the
young man and now, smiling timidly, she looked at Mr. Johnson as though
prepared to be surprised at nothing.
Mr.
Johnson reached into his pocket and took out his wallet. "Here," he
said, and handed a bill to the girl. "This about equals your day's
pay."
"But
no," she said, surprised in spite of herself. "I mean, I couldn't."
"Please do not interrupt," Mr.
Johnson told her. "And here," he
said to the young man, "this will take care of you." The young man accepted the bill dazedly, but
said, "Probably counterfeit" to the young woman out of the side of
his mouth. "Now," Mr, Johnson went on, disregarding the young man,
"what is your name, miss?"
"Kent," she said
helplessly. "Mildred Kent."
"Fine," said Mr.
Johnson. "And you, sir?"
"Arthur Adams,"
said the young man stiffly.
"Splendid," said Mr. Johnson.
"Now, Miss Kent, I would like you to meet Mr. Adams. Mr. Adams, Miss
Kent."
Miss
Kent stared, wet her lips nervously, made a gesture as though she might run,
and said, "How do you do?"
Mr. Adams straightened his shoulders, scowled
at Mr. Johnson, made a gesture as though he might run, and said, "How do
you do?"
"Now
this," said Mr. Johnson, taking several bills from
his wallet, "should be enough for the day for both of you. I would suggest,
perhaps, Coney Island—although I personally am not fond of the place—or
perhaps a nice lunch somewhere, and dancing, or a matinee, or even a movie,
although take care to choose a really good one;
there are so many bad movies these days. You might,"
he said, struck with an inspiration, "visit the Bronx Zoo, or the Planetarium. Anywhere, as a matter of
fact," he concluded, "that you would like to go. Have a nice
time."
As
he started to move away Arthur Adams, breaking from his dumbfounded stare, said,
"But see here, mister, you can't do
this. Why—how do you know—I mean, we don't
even know—I mean, how do you know we won't just take the money and not do what
you said?"
"You've
taken the money," Mr. Johnson said. "You don't have to follow any of
my suggestions. You may know something you prefer to do—perhaps a museum, or
something."
"But suppose I just
run away with it and leave her here?"
"I
know you won't," said Mr. Johnson gently, "because you remembered to
ask me that. Goodby," he added, and went on.
As
he stepped up the street, conscious of the sun on his head and his good shoes,
he heard from somewhere behind him the young man saying. "JLook, you know
you don't have
to if you don't want
to," and the girl saying, "But unless you don't want to . . ." Mr. Johnson smiled to himself and then
thought that he had better hurry along; when he wanted to he could move very
quickly, and before the young woman had gotten around to saying, "Well, /
will if you will," Mr. Johnson was several blocks
away and had already stopped twice, once to help a lady lift several large
packages into a taxi and once to hand a peanut to a seagull. By this time he
was in an area of large stores and many more people and he was buffeted
constantly from either side by people hurrying and cross and late and sullen.
Once he offered a peanut to a man who asked him for a dime, and once he offered
a peanut to a bus driver who had stopped his bus at an intersection and had
opened the window next to his seat and put out his head as though longing for
fresh air and the comparative quiet of the traffic. The man wanting a dime took
the peanut because Mr. Johnson had wrapped a dollar bill around it, but the bus
driver took the peanut and asked ironically, "You want a transfer,
Jack?"
On a
busy corner Mr. Johnson encountered two young people—for one minute he thought
they might be Mildred Kent and Arthur Adams—who were eagerly scanning a
newspaper, their backs pressed against a storefront to avoid the people
passing, their heads bent together. Mr. Johnson, whose curiosity was
insatiable, leaned onto the storefront next to them and peeked over the man's
shoulder; they were scanning the "Apartments Vacant" columns.
Mr.
Johnson remembered the street where the woman and her little boy were going to
Vermont and he tapped the man on the shoulder and said amiably, "Try down
on West Seventeen. About the middle of the block, people moved out this
morning."
"Say,
what do you—" said the man, and then, seeing Mr. Johnson clearly,
"Well, thanks. Where did you say?"
"West
Seventeen," said Mr. Johnson. "About the middle of the block."
He smiled again and said, "Good luck."
"Thanks," said
the man.
"Thanks," said
the girl, as they moved off.
"Goodby," said
Mr. Johnson.
He
lunched alone in a pleasant restaurant, where the food was rich, and only Mr.
Johnson's excellent digestion could encompass two of their
whipped-cream-and-choco-late-and-rum-cake pastries for dessert. He had three
cups of coffee, tipped the waiter largely, and went out into the street again
into the wonderful sunlight, his shoes still comfortable and fresh on his feet.
Outside he found a beggar staring into the windows of the restaurant he had
left and, carefully looking through the money in his pocket, Mr. Johnson
approached the beggar and pressed some coins and a couple of bills into his
hand. "It's the price of the veal cutlet lunch plus tip," said Mr.
Johnson. "Goodby."
After
his lunch he rested; he walked into the .nearest park and fed peanuts to the
pigeons. It was late afternoon by the time he was ready to start back downtown,
and he had refereed two checker games and watched a small boy and girl whose
mother had fallen asleep and awakened with surprise and fear which turned to
amusement when she saw Mr. Johnson. He had given away almost all of his candy,
and had fed all the rest of his peanuts to the pigeons, and it was time to go
home. Although the late afternoon sun was pleasant, and his shoes were still
entirely comfortable, he decided to take a taxi downtown.
He had a difficult time catching a taxi,
because he gave up the first three or four empty ones to people who seemed to
need them more; finally, however, he stood alone on the corner and—almost like
netting a frisky fish—he hailed desperately until he succeeded in catching a
cab which had been proceeding with haste uptown and seemed to draw in towards
Mr. Johnson against its own will.
"Mister,"
the cab driver said as Mr. Johnson climbed in, "I figured you was an omen,
like. I wasn't going to pick you up at all."
"Kind of you,"
said Mr. Johnson ambiguously.
"If
I'd of let you go it would of cost me ten bucks," said the driver.
"Really?" said
Mr. Johnson.
"Yeah,"
said the driver. "Guy just got out of the cab, he turned around and gave
me ten bucks, said take this and bet it in a hurry on a horse named Vulcan,
right away."
"Vulcan?"
said Mr. Johnson, horrified. "A fire sign on a Wednesday?"
"What?"
said the driver. "Anyway, I said to myself if I got no fare between here
and there I'd bet the ten, but if anyone looked like they needed the cab I'd
take it as a omen and I'd take the ten home to the wife."
"You
were very right," said Mr. Johnson heartily. "This is Wednesday, you
would have lost your money. Monday, yes, or even Saturday. But never never
never a fire sign on a Wednesday. Sunday would have been good, now."
"Vulcan don't run on
Sunday," said the driver.
"You
wait till another day," said Mr. Johnson. "Down this street, please,
driver. I'll get off on the next corner."
"He told me Vulcan, though," said the driver.
"I'll
tell you," said Mr. Johnson, hesitating with the door of the cab
half-open. "You take that ten dollars and I'll give you another ten
dollars to go with it, and you go right ahead and bet that money on any
Thursday on any horse that has a name indicating ... let me see, Thursday ..
. well, grain. Or any growing food."
"Grain?"
said the driver. "You mean a horse named, like, Wheat or something?"
"Certainly,"
said Mr. Johnson. "Or, as a matter of fact, to make it even easier, any
horse whose name includes the letters C, R, L. Perfectly simple."
"Tall Corn?" said the driver, a
light in his eye. "You mean a horse named, like, Tall Corn?"
"Absolutely,"
said Mr. Johnson. "Here's your money."
"Tall
Corn," said the driver. "Thank you, mister."
"Goodby," said Mr. Johnson.
He
was on his own corner and went straight up to his apartment. He let himself in
and called "Hello?" and Mrs. Johnson answered from the kitchen,
"Hello, dear, aren't you early?"
"Took
a taxi home," Mr. Johnson said. "I remembered the cheesecake, too.
What's for dinner?"
Mrs.
Johnson came out of the kitchen and kissed him; she was a comfortable woman,
and smiling as Mr. Johnson smiled. "Hard day?" she asked.
"Not
very," said Mr. Johnson, hanging his coat in the closet. "How about
you?"
"So-so,"
she said. She stood in the kitchen doorway while he settled into his easy chair
and took off his good shoes and took out the paper he had bought that morning.
"Here and there," she said.
"I
didn't do so badly," Mr. Johnson said. "Couple young people."
"Fine,"
she said. "I had a little nap this afternoon, took it easy most of the
day. Went into a department store this morning and accused the woman next to me
of shoplifting, and had the store detective pick her up. Sent three dogs to
the pound—you know, the usual thing. Oh, and listen," she added, remembering.
"What?"
asked Mr. Johnson.
"Well,"
she said, "I got onto a bus and asked the driver for a transfer, and when
he helped someone else first I said that he was impertinent, and quarreled with
him. And then I said why wasn't he in the army, and I said it loud enough for
everyone to hear, and I took his number and I turned in a complaint. Probably
got him fired."
"Fine,"
said Mr. Johnson. "But you do look tired. Want to change over
tomorrow?"
"I
would like to," she said. "I could do
with a change."
"Right,"
said Mr. Johnson. "What's for dinner?"
"Veal
cutlet."
"Had
it for lunch," said Mr. Johnson.
THE «EST 01 THE BEST!
For more than a decade Judith Merril has se-
lected the year's best science-fiction and fantasy
for her famous annual The Year's Best S-F. Now }
she has gathered the most outstanding stories
to appear in her first five anthologies. The result y
is the absolute cream of contemporary science-
fiction. Included are: f
BULKHEAD
by Theodore Sturgeon \
STRANGER STATION by Damon Knight
THE ANYTHING BOX by Zenna Henderson
LET'S BE FRANK \
by Brian W. Aldiss
THE PRICE
OF PERIL by Robert Sheckley
DREAMING IS A PRIVATE THING |
by Isaac Asimov J
MARIANA <
by Fritz Leiber jj
JUNIOR s
by Robert Abernathy
ONE ORDINARY DAY,
WITH PEANUTS
by Shirley Jackson |
and
twenty more science-fiction and fantasy gems—
3
all
personally selected by i
.IIIIMTH AlEltML
L'i
H